Why is the internet obsessed with "A Little Life"? 

But I already have 99 in everything!

Wish i could help man... but a sub, like and watching every last second of this excellent video will have to do as thanks

Ayyy got mine, tyvm :)

To be honest I don't understand what's wrong with Hanya Yanagihara's views on suicide. She's not telling mentally ill people to give up and kill themselves. She's critiquing the sanctity of life doctrine in medicine and psychology that cruelly forces absolutely broken and traumatized people to continue living and suffering. Nobody but patients themselves should have the authority to decide whether their pain and suffering is bearable. Nobody but patients themselves should have the authority to decide whether their lives are worth living or not. The world isn't fair to everyone and it's sometimes more humane to let people rest.

I definitely agree with you (Berserk, I'm looking at you)

@@annegiii3446 I feel like Berserk at least has the consistent throughline of the love between Guts and Casca that holds it together and gives it enough hope to keep it from sinking into pure misery porn. Berserk is dark as hell, don't get me wrong, but there is light shining through the cracks.

Definitely agree. It feels like there's a big trend of "Realism = The Best Art, and Miserable = Realism, therefore Miserable = The Best Art" and it's intensely frustrating because every step of that is wrong. I think people have just so romanticized the idea of the "tortured but brilliant artist" that anything that expresses depression or misery is automatically treated as if it's inherently better than things that evoke joy or happiness.

I will die on the hill that The Little Prince is the one of the most important books ever written. A children's book about not becoming a grown up even if you become old. And you don't need a lit degree or clinical depressed to read it

@@annegiii3446 I’m halfway through Berserk and while it is absolutely one of the darkest things I’ve read, there are many many moments of hope, hilarity, and happiness throughout. The characters have to go through a lot of crap to get it but it feels earned and genuine and you actually care about them because of it.

tbh these kinds of books are the best when you are going through a rough phase of your life. You feel as though someone finally understands what you have gone through, as if the author is right beside you comforting you with his harsh, yet tender words; words of comprehension, even if accompanied by suffering and despair. Plus, the moments of extreme sensibility are when we feel life in a more immediate way, leading to spiritual and/or existential experiences that shape us for the rest of our lives. It is a rebirth process that can only come with previous destruction, be it through critical or artistic means. Heck, a depressing book basically saved my life by impeding me of committing suicide (that work being The Sorrows of Young Werther, by Goethe). By the end of the reading, I felt as though I had understood myself on a more meaningful level, as well as if someone - Goethe - had hugged me and told me I ain't the only one suffering. But yeah, it's probably not a good idea to recommend such titles to everyone; this should be analyzed case by case (I mean, The Sorrows of Young Werther literally led multiple european adolescents to off themselves, so it's definitely something that should be treated with a little bit more caution).

btw, I haven't read A Little Life so I'm just talking about miserable books in general.

Finally it’s here… ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-T2JhSoRm-uk.html

not into... uh, _booktube or booktok_ much, but this sounds a lot like what people say about bojack horseman. which.. fits, lol.

@@SpiderMan-gf1lc naaaa. I started reading because I wasn’t feeling well and I basically sucked up the story, got through the book in 8 days. But when I was done, I had a full on depression for 2 weeks

is it bad or good? rate it on a scale of 5

0

@@goblinoide Liber Al VEL Legis, 1: 40-44. "Who calls us Thelemites will do no wrong, if he look but close into the word. For there are therein Three Grades, the Hermit, and the Lover, and the man of Earth. DO WHAT THOU WILT SHALL BE THE WHOLE OF THE LAW. The word of Sin is Restriction. O man! refuse not thy wife, if she will! O lover, if thou wilt, depart! THERE IS NO BOND THAT CAN UNITE THE DIVIDED BUT LOVE: ALL ELSE IS A CURSE. Accursed! Accursed be it to the aeons! Hell. Let it be that state of manyhood bound and loathing. So with thy all; thou hast no right but to do thy will. Do that, and no other shall say nay. For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way perfect." I like my version better.

@@tjenadonn6158 Good for you. You can take it to hell with you.

As a gay man, I'm glad someone shares this sentiment.

AGREED!!!!!!

Sounds like she was getting her rocks off then published it.

This is what happens in a lot of poorly structured amateur writing. I always think a sign of maturity in a writer (or artist) is knowing when to hold back and play your cards carefully.

And then a skeleton jumped out!

Unfortunately, therapy, is not effective for everyone. You're absolutely right, the human brain is capable of learning new coping skills. Sometimes, though, when you're really really sick, you can't learn stuff... there's evidence of hippocampal volume loss and changes to areas involved in emotions and learning.

I am suicidal and working towards euthanasia. I'm sick and tired of professionals not listening to a word I said and trying to sell me life. I'm 45. There's nothing you can say in defense of life that hasn't occurred to me. This is what I want and I don't agree that "there is a way" in every single case. You just want to bleed me dry before I decide to forego the official and humane route. Please, stop it with the toxic positivity. It's destroying us.

@@AvanToor I'm sorry for your pain. I won't share my whole life here, but I think it's easy to assume I'm an outsider to this because I'm talking about losing someone else to suicide, but please understand I live with my own troubles and am speaking from a more varied experience than you may assume. I'm in extensive treatment myself for CPTSD. I live with chronic pain and insomnia. I'm familiar with the edge and the places where you become psychologically unreachable to yourself. Too familiar. I'm sorry for your pain and I don't take your experience lightly. I think there's a difference between sober hope and toxic positivity. I am not even advocating for positivity. I'm also not saying anything about everyone's chances. Wish I could, but it's not that simple. I'm not saying it's a lack of positivity that makes treatment fail or take too long. All I'm advocating for is seeing the difference between physical and mental illness when it comes to treatment, and not declaring a false parity. I've made my own choice to be here and keep trying and I'm often pained by it. It often feels too much, but I'm here and trying. It's not everyone's choice, and I accept that. Who can know your personal hell and tell you how to think about it. But don't tell me that possibilities for healing don't exist or that mental health professionals are immoral when they offer them.

@@amivanzyl8876 I've yet to come across one who's actively invested in solving anything, instead of maintaining a status quo. I'm figuring, the probability of me being that "unlucky" is so low that it almost certainly is a systematic problem. And I think all the labels in general and DSM V specifically are only interested in promoting that system.

@@AvanToor I'm sorry the help you've received has missed the mark. It's unfair and frustrating, and shouldn't have happened and the systems do have huge awful gaps. I think we're speaking past each other so I'll just wish you whatever comfort and peace you want and can find and leave it here.

If you view people as atomized alienated individuals that exist seperat from each other then you are incapable of seeing meaning in community. You can't gat behind that worldview because that worldview is fundamentally anti-human. There's only one thing that sees humans as atomized creatures with no bonds between them and we call that thing capital.

@@KarimElHayawan Oh my god, it's like Thatcherism but more woke. No society, just individuals and found families.

I’m so glad you mentioned this because as a bi and ace person, it was driving me crazy in the book. People don’t need to label themselves but, just how it seems technology doesn’t change and time is at an almost stand still in the world of A Little Life, it also seems like bisexuality just straight up doesn’t exist. When Willem has a hookup with a woman she’s surprised someone who is with a man could be with a woman too, when Willem gets into a relationship with a man everyone just decided all the many relationships with women never happened and he’s gay. I remember during Malcoms portion of the book he speaks about having a crush on both Jude and Willem and coming out as gay but then deciding no, he’s actually straight and marry a woman. Could he not have just been bi? Why was the book so insistent of acting as if gay and straight identities are all that exist.

This isolation is definitely an extension of the author's ideas about therapy and refusing help. Community is possibly the most helpful thing for anyone struggling, especially those with marginalized identities. We could not survive that struggle without it and each other, it's a lot easier to feel like there's no other option except ******* when trying to take on trauma alone

YES! its also amazing to me that jude actually has a great support net around him yet the author will willfully ignore that to drive into her point of how sad and miserable he must be

I want to offer a counterpoint to your thoughts on the author’s views on therapy. Obviously I don’t know the author or what their experiences are, but their views on therapy read to me as coming from not a privileged or ignorant person, but from a deeply depressed, hurt, and hopeless person. When I was in the throes of depression, I had much the same thought. I had the misfortune of encountering mental health “professionals” who were incompetent at best, and downright abusive at worst. They held life in such high regard, without any consideration for QUALITY of life- that’s how I ended up with PTSD from my stay in a ward. When you are repeatedly hurt by the people who are supposed to help you, it is easy to grow weary of being helped at all. Better to wallow in your own misery than risk making it worse by reaching out, no? That’s what this sounds like to me. Like this author has been hurt so repeatedly and so deeply by people who value life, that they have grown to resent life itself. And this book is a way to prove to people just how awful life can be- to share their hatred of it with others. Again, I don’t know much about this author, or their backstory. It’s entirely possible I’m completely off mark. But I think learning why someone holds the beliefs they do is an important part of having empathy for them, and possibly changing their mind. Edit to add: Regardless of their reasoning behind it, though, I want to be clear that their demonizing of therapy is not okay. Nor is their lack of research into trauma when it’s a major part of their book. That’s still shitty, no matter the reasoning behind it.

Good comment and reply. I haven't read the book, so I can't comment on it directly, but I share the concerns about the authors views on therapy. I understand why she equivocates on the value of treatment for physical and psychological symptoms, since at first glance it seems unfair or inconsistent, but I think it's really an unfair comparison. Not because one is less severe than the other, but because one is much more responsive to treatment than the other. Doctors may have a different perspective if patients could physical therapy their way out of permanent and intractable pain, or quadriplegia, or any number of debilitating physical conditions for which there is no lasting treatment. Psych symptoms can be awful and debilitating as well, but in most cases they can also be substantially controlled, if not resolved, from psychotropics and/or therapy. They may have to put in a lot of work to get there, but the chances are quite high that they will get to a place where their life is liveable. I think it would be highly unethical for practitioners to convince patients that they should give up and kill themselves when viable treatment options remain on the table.

I'm really thankful for this comment. I have severe trauma and I've had friends recommend me the book. I then asked another more trusted friend what her thoughts were, and she basically said, "Be careful, I wouldn't necessarily recommend it. It's a lot of misery porn." That seems to reflect a lot of the sentiments here and I think the book should come with a series of warnings for people with actual PTSD- author's views on warnings be damned, it can cause actual real-world harm, especially when it's not researched.

Also: to equate therapy with religion is just kind of a teen-philosophical take…

While I agree with Yanagihara's views on therapy, it's hard to understand why she would openly flaunt her lack of research into the topics of the book.

Same same same

Yo 🔥ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-rdJ9bsN7JAw.html

YES!

I was annoyed (and maybe laughed out of incredulity a couple of times.)

EXACTLY

It wasn't about mental health, though. Please tell me why you would assess the book by projecting your feelings onto it. It was never meant to be your self help guide.

@@jcon2060 Respectfully, trauma is a mental health issue. If you're going to portray someone who suffers severe emotional, physical, and sexual abuse to the point where they have no clearly defined sexuality and engages in explicit aggressive self-harm - Jude is never established as explicitly gay - then you are also, shocker, commenting on what you believe about that class. But more to the point, Hanya Yanagihara has been explicit about her intentions with the book and its goals since she wrote it. One of them was that she had an interest in a person who was irreparably broken, for which no kind of treatment would actually fix them. They don't get better in the end because she doesn't believe talk therapy is valuable. A narrative she thinks is prevalent enough to comment on it by making her character broken past the point of saving. And, finally, I can't believe I have to say this, everyone projects themselves into what they read. Books contain an inherent subjective element because they require the reader to put themselves in the place of a character and live in their shoes in a way no other narrative medium offers. So if I get aggravated because someone is writing about people like me to make a point about me, I'll get aggravated about it. Jesus.

Thanks for saying what I wanted to say. Sounds like she's fetishizing trauma big time.

@@jcon2060 what a stupid comment you have made.

@@Nemo37K Wow, color me surprised. Imagine not being able to differentiate between fiction and non-fiction. A book always tells a tale and it would also be best to separate the artist from his work. Criticisms about narrative structure and characters would be valuable, but the points made in the comment section are all completely invalid, and full of people just projecting their feelings onto a piece of work. Maybe this is why Metallica is getting cancelled by 12 year olds -- with their rose-tinted ideas of what the 80s were like -- because of events that happened three decades ago, when the atmosphere was radically different based on questionable sources and brain-dead interpretation of said events.

This is a really good point. People seem to want to be able to boast about having read certain books more than they want to have had the experience of reading then. This happens a lot with classics, but also sad books like A Little Life and books arguably leaning more toward the pretentious end of the spectrum like Gravity's Rainbow, which is very difficult to read, and that is the reason so many people want to, not because they want to understand the book or enjoy it. You're point links well with what Man Carrying Thing was saying in a recent video about capitalism making us want to have books more than read them.

I don't understand why you would ever pin the blame on anything but the readers for not being able to treat a work of fiction as it is - a work of fiction. One would need just a sliver of critical thinking to be able to analyse a story, come up to a conclusion and move on to the next. You spiel about "adequately warning" people is pretentious and unnecessary, and it shows when you assume the popularity of the book is due to its online presence which you deem problematic. All that matters at the end of the day is that people read stories, analyse those stories and move on with their lives. It isn't more complicated than that.

@@jcon2060 And one would just need a sliver of critical thinking to realize some people might be more affected by that kind of depiction if it's something that is particularly close to them or something they went through. In your defense, if you have lived a very easy life it might be hard to understand the concept of some things being unpleasant, however. Or... the fact that stories are meant to evoke feelings and thoughts, which is the whole point, and some people might not be interested in going through that emotion at the moment. So I don't hold it against you if you just have a lack of experience with any actually difficult, taxing situation.

@@jcon2060 I feel you may have interpreted my comment in bad faith - I never suggested that the book itself was at fault for the way readers have treated it, in fact I directly said the opposite. I also definitely don't believe that a book's popularity being bolstered by the internet is anywhere near a bad thing, I wouldn't engage with bookish content if I didn't like people talking about books on the internet. The point I was bringing up wasn't really anything to do with the content of the book itself, but the way the internet has somewhat commodified the experience of having read it, as another commenter has put so well. Even just typing "A Little Life" into RU-vid, you'll run into a bunch of reading vlogs where the whole premise is "i'm FINALLY reading the sad book (because it will make me cry and I can show you footage of it for content)". Many people online seem to be engaging with this book not because they're interested in the premise or anything the book might have to say, but because it's infamous for being sad and reading it has become this "brave undertaking" - "it's the crying book that makes everybody cry, let's see if it gets me too!" It's not necessarily an entirely good or bad thing, but the view I was offering was that for those uninitiated with what the book is actually about, who only hear about it as the sad book that makes everyone cry, the "challenge" that this book has come to pose through the internet's treatment of it, or maybe just intrigue because of it's portrayal on the internet, might lead people to pick it up without being fully aware of the graphic content they're about to consume, as in the case of Hannah from A Clockwork Reader, who I mentioned before. Again, it's not the fault of the book that the internet has decided to engage with it in such a specific way, but given how many graphic and disturbing themes appear to be included in the novel, it's reasonable that someone going into it with the sole intention of joining a fun internet trend might find themselves unprepared and distressed by just how dark the book gets. I wasn't necessarily advocating for any sort of solution to a situation like this, just offering an observation.

I'm sorry but how does a book that's culturally known as really sad not implicitly indicate it might be 'potentially deeply distressing'. Seems like this is a really inane accusation to make of the faceless horde by a very dumb reader who doesn't research the books she's too fragile to read

You're really strong for still being here. I hope that you will have more happiness in life soon

you have BPD

I deeply felt your comment. The book has been on my want to read -list and I I got it from the library once, but now I'm definitely not reading it. I do not want a book feeding those kind of thoughts in my head. All the best to you, you're not alone.

im bipolar and i don’t necessarily stray away from reading books with dark subject matter either pertaining to mento illness or trauma. I often can derive meaning from them and find them to be cathartic or even depending on the outcome, comforting. *But what I will not do* is engage in sanist punishment and generally shit ideology.

@@kukachoo42 Same. I just read No Longer Human and it was dark and explored a tortured and cruel psychology, but it in no way tried to push a pro-suicide ideology. Highly recommend that book, but I don't think I'll touch A Little Life.

You'd think Fan Fiction would be more popular when books like this and 50 Shades of Gray blow up while using the same tropes.

@@NigelMelanisticSmith I mean 50 shades of gray was actually a fanfiction of twilight that got picked up by a publisher

@@Me-io3wg that's why I mentioned it. It seems like some people will only read fanfiction if it's published

It really does feel like a fanfiction or at least an OC fic. The focus on only putting the characters through suffering in lieu of exploring and developing them (and acting like making characters suffer automatically leads to an interesting or fleshed out character) is a pretty big sign. (also the focus on all the characters being gay despite the author being from what I can tell a straight woman but that’s another matter). Makes me wonder if it started off as maybe a Marauders or K-pop fanfiction or something. I feel it got such a reaction from the literary world because people from that side of things aren’t used to the tropes and don’t recognise the similarities to the average AO3 work and as such it comes off as very new to them (whereas for me I could only really appreciate the fact that the writing was polished because everything else to me seemed like it’d been done to death already, and better in many cases, so I didn’t feel the book had anything new to say or add. I also had many other problems with the book’s structure and some prose nitpicks so it really didn’t do it for me).

characters dont need to be well developed for art to be good art. literature is not script writing or showmaking or storytelling. literature is art. Not saying this sad attempt at passing sadism as a life lesson is good tho, just saying that characters dont need to fulfill "potential" they serve the art.

Yo 🔥ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-rdJ9bsN7JAw.html

Yeah, I think all his experience making 15 second videos really pays off when cutting down longer videos. I could have used a little more context, but I appreciated the conciseness.

Finally it’s here… ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-T2JhSoRm-uk.html

yes

Yo 🔥ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-rdJ9bsN7JAw.html

Is this conditioning ?

A little life is a very traumatising book. I’m not saying you have to love it, you don’t; but engaging with it does require some emotional honesty, like it’s very difficult to satirise the book intentionally. I personally thought the book was well written but also agree with man carrying things criticisms and I didn’t think this review was a skit. I thought this is genuinely how he felt about it.

@@ManCarryingThing i no

Most of the people on youtube that I've seen rave about it fits into the 'basic-white-girl' stereotype - they say stuff like "this book broke me" - as someone with very bad social anxiety that I'm actively trying to work on , this book offended me and I'm not easily offended It's hard to explain but its like they feel good for feeling sad/bad about all the tragedy in the book? Like they just want to feel something since their real life is so far removed from any real tragedy It's ostensibly trying to take the subject matters seriously but it comes out hollow and exploitative - and I can't understand how anyone with any experience with trauma or know someone going through things could think this book is at all realistic I've read fantasy books more grounded in how people behave than this book

Finally it’s here… ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-T2JhSoRm-uk.html

as a survivor of the type of childhood abuse depicted in the book, when ever i see these "i read a little life" videos, i feel sad and unseen. because, it is, as you said, always well adjusted able bodies people who "challenge" themselves to read this book ultimately for entertainment and content. there are so many of us who don't "get" to be entertained or challenged by this book, because we lived and keep living with what this book tries to depict. and then it does it so poorly and manipulatively. and it makes me feel so unseen when people who have not experienced severe trauma then talk how this makes them understand it better. to have people base their understanding of trauma on this book feels insulting. and i know no one means any harm with the videos they make, and many youtubers i love have done those, but when ever one pops on my feed i just get a little sad.

Good thing about books, is that no one forced you to read it, or finish it.

@@boatsagainst i‘ve just finished the book and I haven’t felt the way you felt. Could you explain to me so I understand what‘s the issue with disabilities in her story?

I’m around page 230 and idk if I should finish it or not. I want to because I spent like $30 on it, but it’s been probably over a month since I read it because it’s such a slow burner and now hearing all of these thoughts Idek if I want to continue with it lol. I want to finish it to complete my own opinion, but I also just don’t know if I can be bothered atp lol

@@Sophie_Pea Could just read the wiki on it, or listen to someone else break down the story like this dude almost did. I honestly think this book is rubbish and uses cheap tricks while blundering through delicate topics.

@@Sophie_Pea please don’t just return the damn book because it gets so fucking bad eventually judas trauma becomes hilarious as a trauma survivor there’s nothing funny about trauma yet somehow yanigihara made the book and Judas trauma so exaggerated you cant take it seriously anymore

@@ugsubliminals man i’m glad I wasn’t the only person who found it funny. the first few bits of trauma were pretty horrifying but by the tenth angsty thing to happen it was just too much and it became unintentionally funny. (Obligatory disclaimer that real trauma and actual victims in real life are nothing to laugh at). I think the book did a serious disservice to actual trauma survivors everywhere, honestly

I found an interesting reply to this type of point you are making. Namely, that as readers we are put on the spot: at what point do we stop believing Jude‘s narrative? At what point are we mistreating Jude because we don’t believe him and how suffers? I genuinely believe that people can have a life similar to Jude‘s in respect to how bad it is. Not necessarily how it played out from the plot exactly, but I firmly believe there are people who have lives worse than Jude, but we don’t get to see them because not every life is documented and not every victim speaks out. So, not accusing you of this, I find these charges that I hear that the book is unrealistically cruel pretty stupid. That‘s exactly what‘s wrong with us: we find it ridiculous what victims tell us and don’t believe them.

thanks dude :)

The finality of accepting defeat and submitting to the Green Eggs and Ham and subsequently dying a slow death of radiation induced cancer

Finally it’s here… ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-T2JhSoRm-uk.html

At least when Thomas Ligotti did that he devoted an entire separate philosophical treatise to it outside of his fictional works. Seriously though read The Conspiracy Against The Human Race. For multiple reasons it's easily the scariest thing he's ever written, not the least of which is how convincing and thoroughly he lays out his case.

I’ve never considered this, and now I’m going to ponder on it for days to come. I’m so glad I read your comment

I think the inverse of this just explained why I can't stop watching Succession, a show about awful billionaires being awful to each other in incredibly funny ways (it's the sort of show where both the fandom and the awards shows can't agree whether it's a dark comedy or serious drama with comedic elements.)(The phrase "Gobbldey-go fuck yourself is uttered at one point, and the most healthy relationship in the entire show includes lines like "I would castrate you and marry you in a heartbeat" and "What was I going to use a soul for anyway?") I want to believe that those people are just as fucked as I am.

All human beings suffer.

@@bananachocopie this and sometimes I think people seeing other people suffer in possibly a worse way than them makes them feel better about themselves/makes them hopeful about their situation/distracts them from what they’re dealing with

thank you for putting this into words

Same.

Me tooo

So so brave

What's tbr?

​@@lolwtfbbq111to be read, it's a list of books you want to read in the future

agreed 100%, it's just misery porn 😐

I never finished the book it was so much misery for misery sake and made no sense, it just made me uncomfortable and I've never felt that with a book before - with all the terrible things happening to Jude specifically I don't understand how he could function let alone become some top lawyer when hes described as someone whose always cowering in the corner alone I think the reason i felt so uncomfortable was because the author obviously was missing something and I felt bad for the characters as if they were real people being forced to go through trauma by some evil puppet master I just couldn't suspend my disbelief and at the same time the issues tackled are real but butchered by the author I feel like a lot of the young people who just LOVE this book has a very naive view of the world and have never gone through real trauma and can't spot the ridiculousness of it all

i hate trauma porn. I think it's really manipulative and cynical

Wow! Amazing comment

Upvoted just for 'Jake "Man Carrying" Thing'.

He’s the gore Vidal of our time

Finally it’s here… ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-T2JhSoRm-uk.html

Yeah. It’s like ryona.

"the limits of therapy" If the author is more knowledgeable, she would realize that therapy is constantly evolving and challenging its limits. Because that's how science works. Moreover, there are many forms of psychotherapy you could choose from. CBT, DBT, Rational emotive (?), etc. And why would she compare therapy with religion? Usually, you cannot question religion. With psychology, you have to question things so that you'll have research papers.... And why would she not research the main topic without taking account other aspects, perspectives, experiments, of the main topic of trauma? Sound like her point of view IS a religion.

@@Andy-gg4xw Yeah. When Jude finally decides to see a therapist at the end and then he's dead in the next chapter I think we're supposed to see that as an indication that therapy couldn't help him and his suicide was inevitable. Instead I was like "hmm, he could maybe have benefited from DBT or antidepressants or something but I guess that doesn't make for good misery porn." The Simpsons quote "we've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas!" comes to mind.

Well said and incisive.

THANK U . Agree

This is so lovely to hear, thank you so much

@@ManCarryingThing Thank you for helping me entertain myself again. I have felt much more whole by reading, before I did not have many hobbies. Thank you so very much for your response.

most gays become gay after being groomed by predatora. Also, I don't think Jude was gay and Willem was also a predator.

What was the other one?

@@Cuyt24 Where did you find this figure?

@@twokindsofovenfries32 The People in the Trees

@@Cuyt24 bruh

Yet friendships do fade and alter and ebb and flow over time...life changes and so does the centrality of certainfriends - geography, work, health, relationships etc...friends we have at eighteen may still be in our lives but in a lesser way, if at all. People become peripheral. I'm an old cynic in my late thirties, so perhaps I sound a little negative but I think the fact that Malcolm and J.B are not as central later in the novel is quite realistic of life.

​@@Journalistwoman Regardless of how realistic it may or may not be I personally also got a bit disappointed but because I had heard it being advertised as a story of friendship/ 4 friends going through obstacles and growing older together. I found Malcolm and JB interesting as characters and was disappointed when I found out we wouldn't really get to know them that well. I think I would have liked the book more if it was less Jude/ Jude and Willem centric and instead included a bit more from Malcolm and JB's lives too.

@@alcs-ir1ev I understand. It may have been interesting, say, to have Malcolm's point of view when Jude first attempts suicide. Malcolm's input in this section is to merely replace the blood-stained marble he initially designed in Jude's bathroom. How both Malcolm and JB found Jude to be so puzzling, wary and unusual as a sixteen-year old at university is briefly described but more insight and dialogue exchange may have enforced some of their (quite ephemeral) thoughts and feelings.

Keep with you plan. The book is ridiculous. The best thing about this book is this video essay.

thanks doctor!

Like at least Vince Gilligan knew when to cut it off with Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul. He made self destruction, while none the less devastating, fun to watch, with characters that find a degree of redemption like Jesse Pinkman and Kim Wexler, or score the emotional/philosophical victory if not the material victory like Nacho Varga and Mike Ehrmantraunt. It's not just a slog of misery.

@@tjenadonn6158 Not to mention those shows are surprisingly hilarious.

@@shamsham1229 Seriously, does "A Little Life" have a lawyer screaming "HE DEFECATED THROUGH A SUNROOF!" or mentions of the elusive Hoboken squat-cobbler? I don't think so.

I felt the same way about euphoria. It just became way too much

piggybacking off your comment and another, i agree that shows like shameless and euphoria have “gotten too much”. these shows started out great, there was room for improvement but a majority of the stories were compelling enough to want more…and then i feel the writers/producers put more shock value or kind of comedic stupidity and selfishness of characters we were rooting for all for the sake of profit and views. it’s one thing to write a flawed character and/or story, but it’s another to write a *good* written flawed character and/or story. idk. sigh.

I've read SO MANY good things about Bojack, it's really interesting. I haven't watched it yet, but I do intend to, a this comment gave me one more reason for me to. I honestly don't think I've ever seen this happen with a tv show, specially an animation. Not even ATLA. Anyways, random comment, but yeah lol

@@r4.v3n I cannot recommend it enough. Its NOT trauma porn like this book, it's easily the most accurate and human depiction of damaged people I've ever seen. I'd suggest giving the first half if the first season your time, it takes a while to get going. It's also one of the most rewatchable shows I've ever seen, there are so many funny background jokes and witty lines that you can't catch them all on first watch.

He

@@r4.v3n yeah it does take a few episodes to find its feet and then it hits the gas and never lets up until the very last episode. Just be warned it can be emotionally draining at times. In a good way but still.

Two of the things I appreciated most about Bojack were: 1. He doesn't mess up a narratively satisfying amount of times and then have convenient character development. He fucks up over and over, and consistently fails to learn or fumbles his attempts at redemption, just like a real person like him would. 2. The series didn't end on some horrifically bleak note but a more neutral one about how you will have to deal with the consequences of your actions, that the hard work of being a better person is worth it but not always rewarding and definitely not a clean streamlined process like a character arc on a sitcom such as Horsin' Around.

Jude doesn't have a sexual identity but as you said "I haven't read this book in particular"🙂

@@hibellla tbf hanya has an obsession with mlm, be it gay, bi or unlabeled. so op isn't wrong technically

lmfao it’s crazy that you act like gay men don’t do this shit too. a gay man wrote american psycho which is full of unnecessary, overly bleak violence against women.

Gay men harm women… sexuality doesn’t take away the position they benefit from in society at the expense of women for being men. This may not have been said with cruel intent but it’s important not to forget this fact.

Omg I just read it. “The first time he [Jude] cuts himself, you are horrified; the 600th time, you wish he would aim.” Chu literally put what I felt reading this book into the most savage phrase possible.

​@@dasssass6227 I knoow! So simple, so awe-inspiring.

I've watched the London play too, yet I can't imagine going to see the play without having first read the book. Not a criticism. The play is a condensed textual 'sketch' despite the length of the performance and of course because of the (different) dramatic medium. I actually thought Willem's death scene in the play was questionable in how it was conveyed/performed (whether the actor or the script/direction - I think the script because Luke Thompson was excellent and should have played Jude in my opinion - apparently he was first chosen to read for the part of Jude and Norton for Willem). Neither the book or the play are 'torture porn' to refer to that now over-used tabloid like critique of a novel which I think is really interesting, and horrific in its subject, and pathos-ridden and frightening and awakening (as are many stories/books/songs and fairy tales etc). Jude's suffering is heightened but the continuum of abuse/abusive situations is not unreal.

That book is on my TBR, so I will be reviewing it soon

@@ManCarryingThing Ooh! I’m very excited to hear about it. Do you plan on reading the Juni Ito adaptation afterwards? I’ve heard very good things about it.

I just read both of these books, No Longer Human overall a much more solid work, even less fun read because of the relentless despair but better put together and shorter books often have less fluff. I think it's going to haunt me in ways that A Little Life will not.

The story is life affirming at some point but the point is to show that even when life seems to give you everything, there are people who are so scarred that they cannot accept the love and kindness they are offered. Jude‘s mind has been so profoundly altered by the abuse and manipulation he suffered that he cannot keep going on.

@@lendrestapas2505 yes Jude suffers toxic stress and ptsd and cannot escape his horrific childhood. The accumulation of wealth doesn't negate his ever-present imposter syndrome. Education, intellect and work are Jude's resilent factors and even though he is greatly accomplished in each sphere, wariness and fear are a constant.

I agree it seems f-tishistic, I've always gotten the vibe from this book that it's the same thing as men writing about the beautiful suffering female r-pe victim yada yada and they seem so turned on by it, this book gives the same vibe, the fact that Jude is so damn perfect at everything and intelligent and goodlooking even though he thinks he's so ugly it's just ughh..

What? Where do you get the vibes that it‘s fetishizing these things? In the book they are all portrayed as being an immense source of suffering and misery to Jude.

Beautifully written.

​@@lendrestapas2505your comment doesnt contradict op at all tho. Also, op is not stating his opinion as fact, so chill

I think it’s about capacity to give consent

​@@bruhmoment1761when you say capacity to give consent, can you clarify what the consent is for? I'm not sure I understand what you are saying

hello !! I am not sure where I stand on "not all mental illness is treatable" yet, however, I think it's an incredibly valid and discussable point, specially because, as you said, there are many people who seem to be beyond any kind of help. You asked why it was wrong to point out those "limits" when they present themselves, and I think the problem lies on WHERE those limits are, and how anybody could pin them down. How could you possibly decide when the things you've gone through make you beyond "saving"? Although they didn't elaborate, the person above mentioned consent, and I think there's a discussion to be had about if people who decide to take their own lives are level-headed enough to even make that decision; not to mention what the author said about professionals assisting with the endeavor. In my personal experience, when looking back at my attempts and the thoughts that led me to them, I was NEVER thinking clearly. I was always pushing my own ideas about myself that were not true, and even though people in my life proved me wrong time and time again, I could never see it. When in that state, I NEVER saw a way out. I thought there was absolutely no way I could ever recover or even feel happy again. But, sometimes, a little, even if just a tiny tiny bit of light, shined through. I pushed through because I thought there WAS a way. What I mean to say is that even if there are "limits" to what a person can go through before becoming absolutely unsalvageable, I'd say MOST people with any experience with suicide think they're at their limit; that there's no way out. That's where I think that line of thinking becomes almost impossible in practice. If we told all the people with suicidal intention "Maybe YOU ARE truly unsalvageable", I believe it'd be terribly irresponsible. About "What is inherently wrong with taking one’s life if one is suffering that intensely?", I don't think people think badly of the person who takes their own life usually (aside from a select few, who think they're "selfish", will go to hell, or some more nuanced situations like a parent leaving a child alone). And "What is inherently noble about living a life of pain?", I think the admiration comes from a person willing to work through their struggles instead of simply letting go. However, I think it's interesting how this admiration does not commonly translate to hate when a person DOES decide to let go. Albeit, I didn't understand these questions well in relation to the original argument, so if you could elaborate a bit more on them I'd love to listen! But, that's why I don't like this book at all. Sorry, I know you don't mention it lol, but I just wanted to say this. I saw so many reviews of people who read this book saying they felt relief when he died because they felt it would just be better. I've actually dealt with a similar situation before, when people thought a dear friend just dropping dead would be "better", and, I think nobody gets to decide that. To me, it's almost insane to say that someone would be better off dead than trying their hand at any kind of recovery. In the book, the fellow tries to heal multiple times, but the author just kicks them down, time and time and time again, as many people have said, to an almost "comical" degree. It angers me how the author says that living through those issues (which they did absolutely ZERO research on) means that you SHOULD just die because it's better that way. That's absolutely insane to say about things you don't know a drop about, imo. I don't think I would dislike it nearly as much if the author actually poured some research on the book, because THEN maybe they would've read about people's story of getting better, or getting worse. Anyways, sorry if this was long or all over the place. I hope it came off as respectful because that's what I intended; I think the questions you raise are very important and need to be discussed. Nothing should be dismissed without discussion just because of its controversy. And lastly, if you liked this book that's fine !! You can find comfort where I don't. thanks for reading if you did !!

Lots of great things happen to the main character in the book as well as suffering. Read it, then make the judgement.

thank you for saying that! i liked a few parts of this book but feel so weird saying that because everyone seems to hate it so much (for good reason but still) even though some of it showed real promise.

​@@christine0382 same here! I completely understand why this book is so divisive, and why so many people hated it (especially considering the author's lack of research and views on the very serious issues in it), but there's just something about this book that's stayed with me since I first read it. Like you, there are just certain parts that I liked a lot too. But yeah, even though I love this book, I think it's really important to acknowledge and be critical of a lot of the problematic aspects of it as well.

@@michelledoesstuff yeah definitely, i agree, the book is flawed in a lot of ways

It's because of something that you both have in common. Pleasure from voyeurism is an inherently female trait. Murder shows, trashy shows, this ignorant, ridiculous, stupid fucking book. It's a pattern. Accept it.

@@michelledoesstuff This is what is amazing about reading, it's totally subjective. There will always be people that doesnt like a certain book, there isn't a book that everyone objectively likes - its impossible. Every book has flaws, because there will always be that one person that thinks about that certain flaw. This is something you have to come to terms with yourself. You make your own subjective opinion. If you like the book you like it. Don't let other people influence your opinion.

I think sometimes people want to focus on a certain aspect of something and blow it out of proportion. I could say I felt the same way after reading this book; I felt a renewed sense of the people in my life and how I should appreciate them more.

Oh be quiet you, you are not a survivor. You don't have PTSD. You are a weak narcissistic child and you need to grow up. Just stop it.