Hey Shooshimooshi, can you watch Orthodoxia from Guichry. Feat Flower please? I wanna know what the meaning is and maybe if you can react you can get some details out of it?
I have BPD and lost 70% of my friendships because of that. It really sucks because the smallest hint of rejection (that I'm probably imagining) can make me spiral and get really angry. It's either you like me or you hate me. There is no in between for me
@@justanomorifan3059It is most commonly diagnosed in adults, but the symptoms tend to develop in your teenage years. Most don’t want to diagnose teenagers with personality disorders as there’s a lot of hormonal/mood/personality changes within them and it’s kind of just depending on the severity of symptoms and the doctors people are seeing. It’s also a little hard for people to determine when exactly it develops in THEMSELVES because there’s still a large stigma around all personality disorders (even within medical spaces) and people are either not believed or shamed for having symptoms associated with them.
@@justanomorifan3059 Definitely. Still waiting for the day people weed out “psychopath” “antisocial” “sociopath” and “narcissist” from their descriptions of people who don’t actually have ASPD or NPD, just makes the stigma even worse.
This song isn't actually about a specific disorder according to Crusher. Just mental health in general. It can thus be interpreted to fit any condition it needs to. Including BPD, as is often interpreted. Also, fun fact, this song has a highly underrated official light novel! More people need to read it. Please... I feel like the only person in this fandom who has.
Omg you finally reacted to this absolute banger and vocaloid classic. Edit: On a more serious note as someone interested in psychology i always read about different people’s experiences with certain mental disorders/illnesses and everything ive seen on BPD is really heavy. Being in a constant fear of lashing out and not being able to control your emotions versus feeling completely empty and depressed at certain times makes the life of any individual struggling with BPD extremely difficult.
As a psychologist, I have come across several people with this disorder. It is incredibly interesting like you say it is. However, there are many more mental conditions I personally find more interesting such as BPD which is a lot like Bipolar disorder in many ways, but has an extra layer of "depth" to it.
I have BPD. And yes, the lyrics are very accurate. I think the better description of this mental condition is: "having an eternal war against yourself". As the lyrics says "My enemy's invisible, I don't know how to fight. The trembling fear is more than I can take, When I'm up against, The echo in the mirror" Crusher-P has another song called "Again" (with the voice of Gumi, by the way) that describes BPD even better, or at least, describes Better how it feels for me to live with this personality disorder. I highly recommend you to check out that song too :)
tbh echo also speaks to me as someone who deals with depression. depression makes your brain see everything as hopeless. you cant seem to find anything good to make the black that you life seem to be a little grayer, you cant see an escape for yourself besides you know. running away. burning your house down. as in killing yourself(i deal with frequent suicidal thoughts as well). you also stop seeing all the colors others see, everything is... bleak. meaningless. i also used to think i might have bpd but turns out depression can also result in impulsive decisions and a lot of pent up anger, irritation etc etc. back when i was young id listen to this song a lot and back then i wasnt diagnosed with depression officially but i found myself in the lyrics. also the song just objectively slaps lol. vocaloid is such an amazing tool to create songs like these that expalin experiences with mental illnesses so personally, it hits home very close and is comforting in a way. man vocaloid is great.
This whole comment just took all the thoughts and feelings I have and put it into words...I'm sad but also kinda happy I'm not the only one who feels this way.
@@RandomDrawer_tm yeah definitely the same for me! feels validating to finally understand what you're feeling and all these thoughts be put into words especially as a catchy song!!
as someone who has adhd I relate to this song especially with hyper focusing its either im all focused on something or im completely unfocused on something that should be simple
“My enemy is invisible i don’t know how to fight” hit so fucking hard for me i have BPD and never fully understand my diagnoses till i got older (duh) but i really was always fighting my own thoughts and emotions never understanding why they’d consume me so intensely while simultaneously trying and not knowing how to fight it/me. Life with BPD really is just constant suffocation of emotions or completely dissociation and emptiness. I feel bad for my younger self for not fully understanding what it was that I was always fighting. I’ve listen to this song since childhood and never knew the meaning till now cuz i never read the lyrics lol.
There's more thooo, there's "Again", "Wildfire" , "Monster" and then "Copycat". I think that's the order I saw in a comment once, so I think of this is a series. More Gumi for ya!
If that person thought you were "too old" to be reacting to music (which is a huge wtf on it's own?) then... why were they in your stream to begin with? Also you are not even that old! Compared to me (40) you are baby!!! I think you're doing just fine. I love your reactions and personal insights on so many of these amazing songs. Vocaloid is for everyone! Music is for everyone! And I'm pretty dang sure you're not the only person on YT or Twitch doing things like this. Keep up the good work, Sooshi.
As someone with BPD, I can say it's very hard to deal with it due to how much tiny things can make you spiral and overthink it as if someone was "betraying you", and the aftermath also hurts cause you know it's you doing this to yourself but you can't stop it. This song and "Again" made by the same producer always gave me BPD vibes even before I knew I had it! I'm happy you touched the topic the way you did cause it's easy for people to end up talking about BPD as if people with it were horrible or "doing it on purpose" :)
FIRST OFF, thank you so much for explaining it in an empathetic and understanding way. i keep seeing people demonize bpd, and it hurts so much because we're really trying our hardest. it's so hard to manage the insane amount of emotions we feel every single day anyways, as someone who has bpd, i think this song represents it well. it's really hard because there's no in between. it's either i hate you or i love you, or I think someone hates me or loves me. it's very difficult to navigate when no one tells you what's wrong, but you're feeling all of these confusing emotions. It switches so fast too, it can be hours or even minutes in between. i think the bridge shows off the abandonment issues and impulsivity that comes with bpd. "im gonna burn my house down" impulsivity (sometimes dangerous) is definitely a symptom "i'm gonna run away now and never look back" there's a side of abandonment issues that isn't clingy, rather pushes everyone when they get too close. (that's what I have) I think they can also work together, maybe the house representing a relationship of some kind. I can't believe i never noticed 😭
My ex was recently diagnosed with Bipolar. I was with him for about three years and man what a time. We didn't know he had it. After trying to help him and have him realize that he needed to seek help at the time, I came to realize that he just did not care enough to do so. If he had sought help and taken me seriously I do believe we would still be together. But because he didn't take me serious enough to get help (I was 100% willing to go with him to make him comfortable) one thing led to another and the situation became dangerous. Yes diseases like this can become very serious, but ultimately the person needs to be willing to make an effort, and I get that it can be scary to do so, and as I personally don't have this I don't truly know what it is like, but effort needs to come from both people. Stay safe out there guys and dont be ashamed to seek help when you need it. It just makes you a very commendable person.
as someone with BPD, this song always comforted me, knowing that i wasn't alone. such a great song. it's amazing to hear someone bring awareness to this disorder
So I have BPD (relatively strong, was diagnosed at a young teen) and I can just say it's really hard to have healthy relationships. Especially with my partner (who also has bpd), since the relationship is so intense,when I am with them I am also really impulsive, and I've lashed out on them before as well.
Alright, before I go in deep, please give credit to CircusP for the tuning of Gumi! Circus and Crusher used to work together on songs before they had a falling out and I feel like Circus never gets recognition for helping with Echo! I am not diagnosed but I’ve been highly suspecting myself of BPD and I honestly completely relate to the song. I have a hard time making friendships because I perceive myself as a bad person for having such “black and white” mindsets. One minute I can be enamored by someone in my life and the next I was to call them out for all their bullshit. It’s characterized by intense changes in emotion that are felt to an extreme degree which makes it hard for people to control their actions. It makes it very difficult, especially when I get attached to others because I’m very bad at hiding my behaviors that I feel selfish. I feel like a bad person for even having emotions like this and I’ve pushed people out of my life because of it. It’s gotten worse over the year, like im so infatuated with people that I fell in love with my close friend of only a few months! Whether I have it or not, I’ve read up on people’s experience with BPD and it’s very heartbreaking because people treat those with it as manipulators or abusers when in the end, we just want to be loved the right way
Thanks for sharing this :). No yeah it’s a really complex and difficult thing to deal with for everyone involved. So yeah don’t lose patience or hope 😌. Just like I say in the video, it takes communication and a commitment to managing it as best as you can with the more you learn about it and yourself!
As a girl who has Dissociative identity disorder (DID) i dont even know what my real personality is. Im all over the place there isnt really a permanent me. Thats why its so hard for people to get through my skin.
I have a friend who has BPD, and in my experience. it isn't that bad, it's just sometimes they manipulate me or exploit me. but really, they are very kind. love the video shooshi❤
It’s not bad for you, but for them it’s hell. It really bothers me when people only talk about how they’re the victim of someone with bpd, not realizing that it’s considered the most painful mental illness because we feel every emotion so intensely, and they switch up so fast. I can never trust myself, and if it’s bad, I forget that happiness is even an emotion i can feel. I forget every emotion but the one I’m currently experiencing, so I never even know if I’m getting better or not. When im happy, i question if im even mentally ill, but when something triggers me, it’s so horrific because I feel like it’ll be that way forever and I’ll never feel happy again. When I was doing research on BPD when I was first diagnosed, I found r/bpdlovedones and it only reinforced my fears that I’m actually evil and abusive for my disorder, despite the fact it’s 100x harder to live with than to deal with secondhand. You can leave your friend alone whenever, but they will be stuck with their own mind 24/7 for the rest of their life. It’s horrifying, and I’m not saying you shouldn’t talk about your own experience, but please understand this disorder IS “that bad”, even if your friend keeps it to themself mostly, like I do as well except for occasionally lashing out (which leads to severe shame spirals for a lot of us). 1 in 5 people with BPD attempt suicide, and 1 in every 10 people with bpd die by suicide.
Hey, no matter if they do it by accident or not. It isn't okay, maybe their bpd is a reason for it but it is not an excuse. - sincerely a person with BPD
This actually made me so happy! I have ASD, BPD and C-PTSD so seeing this made me feel alot better and less alone with this condition. It’s very comforting. BPD is very hard to go through.
This was the song that introduced me to vocaloid actually, I used to consume a lot of animated Undertale stuff on RU-vid and got into it after I saw a sans animation or something and my cousins who were already into vocaloid explained what vocaloids are to me and also gave me song recommendations and stuff. This was like 2014 or 13, the YTP and MLG phase of the internet.
I'm autistic and have BPD and adore this song even before I realized I had either and listening back to this song after the fact hits me like a truck because it hits so close to home
Im so happy to see you reacting to Echo. As someone living with bpd i always highly related to this song. I got my diagnosis about 5 year ago, and still have a long way to go in terms of theraphy, but allready improved on handeling certain emotions better. Its still pretty though navigating trough live but songs like echo help me feeling understood and not alone ^^
The splitting in my case, is 90% directed to myself. Like if i upset a friend, it triggers a fear of losing them wich causes me to see myself as the worst possible being on earth.
Man thanks for sharing this. No yeah I’m proud of you! Like fr being able to look inwards is a beautiful characteristic. Don’t lose patience. Keep pushin, keep learning about yourself and what makes you tick, and you’ll attract the right people who will stick by you
You should react to (Un)natural Selection!! It uses SynthV Kasane Teto (my wife) and it is absolutely amazing!! And you should 100% react to Teto Territory (which uses UTAU Kasane Teto) And GUMI is also the reason I wake up in the morning. She literally got me into Vocaloid and is probably the reason I even to started to watch your videos 😃 Also fun fact: Nyan Cat is voiced by Momo Momone, one of the first UTAUloids. It was originally sung by Hatsune Miku though so she gets all the fame
Requesting random vocaloid songs (if you’re interested) 1. Non-Breath Oblige 2. Gimme x Gimme 3. Magical Doctor 4. Sick of House 5. Unhappy Refrain 6. HITO Mania (That’s all I have-)
"You're too old to be reacting to this!" 20-year-old here. You know who got me into Vocaloid back in the early 2010s? My older sister. Who is literally OLDER than Shooshi. She's almost 28 and has two kids. We still jam, though!
hey sooshi!! if u ever do another vocaloid reaction, i'd recommend Karma or Copycat both by circusP, banger songs and it copycat is one of their most famous!
This song is so goddamn hype. I used to have this on as background music when I used to play Honkai Impact and watch the KIZNAIVER anime, for some reason this song always brings me back to that little blip of my life. It’s funny in hindsight if this is a song about BPD, cause the character I used the most with the song is Seele, and she kinda got that BPD thing going on with her alternate personality.
I have not been diagnosed it yet but i have it believe honestly because i check the symptoms and it's how i feel and even my friend who was learning to be a therapist she even agrees i wish i could... But it's... Really cool with the video
lmao this is so funny this song along with many other vocaloid songs were my childhood songs but this was the biggest one, i grew up and listened to echo again and i thought that the lyrics to DEEPLY correlated to borderline personality disorder, i related a lot to it too as i had a really devastating experience happen to me and i showed many borderline personality disorder symptoms for a while but i found out it was just my adhd making it seem like it. anyways im really happy you are talking about this as a lot of people say it's bipolar but honestly i think it's bpd
Love the video and amazing analysis! I've been a long time fan - ever since you reacted Aishite - and I'm so happy and proud of how far you've come! 💗 I definitely recommend reacting to Non-Breathe Oblige and Godish by PinocchioP, Heat Abnormal by Iyowa, I Want To Be Cremated by Abuse (same producer who did dogdog) and Shoujo Rei by MikitoP. YY by 23.exe, The Bubble Future by Negi Shower P, if you just want good vibes!
Really recommend you try react to some 傘村トータ(Kasamura Tota)'s songs, the lyrics of her songs are really really well written and it do hits you. I recommend you can starting from 贖罪(Shokuzai) which means Atonement. Hope you listen to it with lyrics on too. The 明けない夜のリリィ(Ake Nai Yoru no Lily) series also really well done, which includes 3 songs: あなたの夜が明けるまで (Anata No Yoru Ga Akeru Made) (Until Your Night Dawns) 明けない夜のリリィ(Ake Nai Yoru no Lily) (Lily of a Night With No Dawn) おはよう、僕の歌姫 (Ohayou, Boku No Uta Hime) (Good Morning, My Diva) 僕が夢を捨てて大人になるまで(Boku ga Yume o Sutete Otona ni Naru made) ( Until I throw away my dreams and become an adult) is also a really really good song Sorry for throwing a wall of text all of a sudden but really hope you can react to at least one of them. I believe you would never regret it. Not only the lyrics, the music even the sound of the Vocaloids are also so so well done.
I had diagnosed BPD when i was 22, and I lost a lot of friends and potential relationships because of something out of my control. I had ppl say I was crazy and toxic, and they even made a hate X/Twitter acc about me because of something I did after a manic episode...
I don't know if you pick recommendations for songs, but I'd really like your reaction to Kokoro, Kowase Kowase, Mr Schadenfreude and Diary of Underage Observation :3
Crusher-P's song Again is definitely the song that describes BPD the best, as someone who suffers from it. I went through a really hard time a few years ago and that song was my comfort song kinda
i have a literal banger of a song. which is love it? by biz and love eat, and love cat. the love trio basically and its so good. kinda a yandere song but a little deeper!
oh! have you seen that gumi has a new VB? she's a SynthV Vocal now! i highly recommend you check out the wife !! there's a song called 10 face! (originally came out like 13 years ago) its gotten a remake with her new voice!
i have diagnosed bipolar disorder but i dont feel the switches myself. its gotten so unconscious that i cant even relate to the lyrics of the song. its like a stranger feeling, i don't even know what is meant with switches. my therapists however tell me that i have those switches to an extreme extent. does anyone have an explanation for this?
( Topic ) I don't have BPD, but I read alot of comments of people who do have BPD, and I hope everyone that has BPD is/can be in a good state of mental and physical health. ( off-topic ) I don't think shooshi hasn't reacted to "chiri chiri juso", or "dust dust curse". ( I believe it isn't a vocoloid, but it is made by Kikuo. ) This song has been used in animation memes, so if you search dust dust curse, you'll find the animation memes. I've only listen to the part used in the animation memes, and i gotta say, it sounds good. I plan to listen to the video. ( it feels so awkward talking about this on a vocoloid reaction video about bpd. I don't want to sound insensitive, especially since i dont have BPD. )
I have always loved when I was younger, and I was listening to this the other day then I thought this song describes bpd well. Glad to know I'm pretty good at interpreting lol. (I never really look into meanings of songs)
I have a tiny suggestion for reaction material, Boyaketa. It’s a short song, but the lyrics leave a bunch of imagination of what could’ve happened to the singer.
I was wondering why you skipped ROUND 3 of Ailen stage or did you forget to react to it? ( Round 3 is on of my favorites and i really wanted to hear youe thoughts on it.)
This is so off topic to the actual video but when he was talking about how someone said he was too old to be reacting to vocaloid I just remembered a video of some man that looked to be in his 70-80s just playing corpse dance on the violin AND HE ABSOLUTELY KILLED IT‼️
