My wife of 38 years just passed two months ago. She was my soulmate ,and everyone says she’s happy now. Well the ones left on earth are the ones who suffer
I feel for ya man. I was with my girl since the ninth grade. We got married right out of high school and were married for 33 years. Every day our love grew that much more. Cancer stole her almost 6 months ago a d it seems like yesterday in my mind. It has been really hard when the sun goes down especially and Im all alone with nobody. The things that keep me going are the fact that I accepted it, I realize I will die some day and I will see her again. I have 12 grand kids and one on the way. They seem to appreciate me more now that We lost her. I keep myself as busy as possible, focus on my health and appreciate the small things in life much more now. As much as I would like to find love again as my Wife really wanted for me it’s not as easy as one would think. Its easy to get in the dumps but when I do I just look at my to do list and try to take care of some important things so they don’t pile up on me. I also realize that despite what people said to me after the memorial service nobody gives a crap about what I’m going through. They have their own problems and we’re all pretty much on our own. We all exit this world alone but we must remember we have God who created us that will take us back a d we will see our loved ones again with a love that is indescribable. We must be patient and give ourselves a break. Crying it out several times a day is healthy. Cherish your beautiful memories and be kind to yourself and your loved ones.
@@jn3098 So sorry you lost your Wife but I know you will see her again. I’m also sorry about the heartless pricks that leave insipid comments on peoples posts when they’re hurting more than they ever have in their entire life. Let’s hope karma gives them the smack in their mouth that their Daddy never did.
I am so sorry for your loss. It is so hard and there aren’t words for the heartache….you are right….the ones left here hurt so much!! Trust God and keep taking a day at a time…I know it is so painful!!
Im so tired of feeling alone (social and situational) and lonely (emotional). Am I at risk for being a chronic alone/lonely? Yep. Am I gonna fight against it with HOPE? Yep! 🙏
It’s been 5 years, 3 months, and 11 days today. 12/31/23. I found your channel a few weeks ago. But I haven’t watched regularly. I’m 73 years old, I live alone in a nice, but rural area. Living on Social Security and hoping I can make my savings last. Thank you for explaining loneliness. Hoping to find more peace deep inside myself in 2024.
@@nancywest4094 hi Nancy. I hope you are managing. Life on social welfare isn't easy. But you sound like you can prioritize and your journey to inner peace will bring you to the right choices.
I am now widowed at 32, he passed away 3 days ago. I feel I am in emotional loneliness and still traumatised watching him die from pancreatic cancer. Thank you for posting stuff like this. I dont know how I will get through this, but somehow I can forsee I will.
Oh, so sorry for you dear. Be strong. Time will work with you and not against you. Accept as best as you can the reality, the loss, the love, the grief… it all works together inside of you. I hope you have a. Strong faith in God’s love and goodness. IT was kept me strong and believing that there is some eternal purpose for our losses and pain. The love you shared is real and will keep giving to you if you will allow it. Seek to embrace this new place as it has gifts to give your soul, too. This is a path no one really chooses for themselves. There are many of us here, though. Cry when you need to, wipe your tears away and get up and do something good for yourself, be patient, be strong… and never let go of the love you shared. Love is eternal. God is love and He will always be with you to show you the way. God bless and keep you in this time of sorrow and pain.
I’m so sorry your way to young to lose your spouse! It takes time. But every day you’ll realize that’s he’s ok now. I know you won’t be for long time. I’m feeling same thing except I was lucky enough to hav my wife for 37 years. God bless all my prayers
5 years Widow and at different seasons I remember my late hubby . This is emotional and it's spills into situational Loss where I isolate . I recognize vaunability in my soul and wish not to draw others into my tears , crying out to GOD to fill in my soul where my partner loss is located. Marriage is not just two walking in unity in this physical world but as a spiritual couple. This intimacy must be filled first with GOD so I will not become a prey nor a snare to others. The bible helps. We as widows and widowers are human so be open to get back into nature see beauty again laugh again and yes even cry at times too.
My soulmate of 37 years died 5 weeks ago. I know she is at piece but I still feel angry, guilty but most of all LONELY!! I cope by staying so busy I don’t have time to think and I’m so exhausted I go right to sleep. I don’t know how long I can keep this up. I attend a grief class looking for help!
Dear Lydia, thank you for providing this platform for widows. I look forward to hearing you. It has be 4 1/2 years for me. I thought I was doing well, until the 4 year came around and it feels like I have only just begun to grieve. I had 3 children still living at home when my husband passed and I had to be strong for them. But now my youngest is a high schooler and doesn’t me as much. I find that the loneliness and sense of purpose in my life is glaring in me in the face. I don’t want to have another relationship to soothe this pain; I want to live my life and enjoy who I am… I hope to find other widows in the same place as I am. I am in my mid-50s. God bless you for sharing with us.
@@joanns7842 dear Joan, I can connect with your phrase of grief staring you in the face. I wake up to this empty hollow feeling every day and before getting off the bed I feel exhausted. I'm glad your children were at home with you during the early time, I'm on my own since my husband died last year april.
Joann - I’m so very sorry! Your path is almost identical to the one I walked a few year ago. Just want to let you know that I am here for you! If you want to connect, let me know. 🥰
@@widowtowidowcoach in happy tears just to know you have offered time to me.. thank you! Just knowing you have someone who understands without even saying a word is strength… Thank you.. I am just now seeing your response.. .not so saavy with youtube interaction.. :). I will follow more of your videos and get better acquainted! God bless you! You speak what I feel! :)
Dear Lidia, I have been married for 57 years to the best man on Earth. I was bereaved on the 19th of December 2022 and I’m finding it incredibly difficult to cope with the loss the loneliness and the love I still feel from my beloved Nicky. I have lots of coping strategies, mainly suggested by my amazing friends network, but I cannot cannot cannot reconcile myself to the fact that… I can’t even say it. you see?bye for now, Dianne
Dear Dianne. I feel for you. Me 42 years best man I ever knew. Miss him so much. But he would of wanted me to go on and live the best life I can. Try my dear to find some happiness Go out and bite the best out of life. Please find some happiness with in yourself .❤❤
That is where I am now and my Husband is alive,but lost to Vascular Dementia,in a care home and I stand on the outside of his life,unable to help.I come home every day,after visiting choking with loneliness.
Oh I’m so sorry! I am not unfamiliar with that burden. You may be interested in getting started now with my program. You can get more info on my website www.widowtowidow.coach
Thank you for sharing this video. I am from north east India, i am widow for 5 years. Last year i started a small widow ministry. Your videos help me a lot.
Thank you so much for letting me know that they are helping you - and thank also for helping the widows in your part of the world. It is a profound journey.
My wife of 20 years unexpectedly passed in her sleep almost 3 months ago on 1/5/24. We have a 14 year old semi verbal autistic son that needs 24/7 supervision. Throwing myself into full time parent mode has helped me get through the initial crippling pain of loss but I know it's not a viable long term solution. My closest relatives are 1100 miles away. My two closest buddies moved out of the area over the last year. So I'm definitely isolated socially, my only real in person interactions are with the staff at my son's school. Relocating to be closer to relatives (very small family) may give me a little social interaction and an emergency backup for temporarily watching my son in case something happens to me but I'll still be on 24/7 Dad duty. I'm trying to see a way to avoid the long term cronic issue but I don't see it yet. I'm getting past the initial FUBAR phase hoping to get into SNAFU sometime soon but I'm worried for the long term.
so sorry for your loss. You’ll be challenged in the days ahead - no doubt about that - but work on taking it a day at time. Look for a support group as well.
We were in relationship for 7 years from 10th standard but we knew each other from childhood, we married on 7 December 2021 and just after 7 months and one week he got into a road accident on 15 July 2022 , it'll be 2 year soon but I still don't have any idea what to do now, I don't have any direction for my life , I don't have any idea what's going on in my life, everyone has ignored me like I never existed even my best friend didn't even called me after visiting once, my family members they are forcing me to remarry as I'm only 23 but they never understand the pain and fear that's not leaving me, they never understand that even the thought of some other man touching me makes me cry
I’m so sorry - but I do understand what you are going through. If you are still feeling like this, please know that I can help you with all of it. Just reach and let’s talk.
I was widowed suddenly at 48 .... its been 2.5 years and its hard ... im a bit more social but its still hard at home alone .. weeknights and weekends.
Yeah its tough. I’m a 53 y/o man. Lost my wife to cancer 2 months ago. Lots of red tape makes the grieving process all the worse and forces you to be in full survival mode. I’ve also been trying to have as much social life as possible. Just going to the store alone at first was a weird feeling. Ive done it a million times but at first it was like I was trying to walk for the first time again, lost like a magnet that lost its other half. Sooooo…..Im just trying to make the most of it in social settings and being receptive to looks from the ladies for the first time since I started dating my Wife when we were in high school. I’m staying busy, keeping my health and body a top priority and hoping the right lady might come along. This would make my wife happy because she kept insisting I remarry. She was worried for me and was always think ten steps ahead. I think staying busy and having as much social interaction is the best way to handle rediscovering yourself after losing your soul mate…it is hard bit the more you do it the easier it gets and the more you’re receptive to smiles, comments and glances from the opposite sex. Its a good feeling to get smiles from the ladies and Ive been taking really good care of my body and eating better. Even with all the crazy red tape Im still finding time to heal myself and the best healing for me has been the looks I get from the ladies and it has done a-lot for my confidence and helps me all around in my outlook on life and keeps me from being stuck in a dark place. I have to a wedding soon. My Wifes coworker’s Daughter is getting married. Im like and Uncle to this girl and she loves me to death. She texts me often and my wife was her biggest hero and she misses her alot. All of my wife’s co workers, all females will be there. I know its going to be really weird seeing them all again because I havent seen them since my wife’s memorial service and I know they’re all going to be awkwardly looking at me to see how Im doing and Im hoping none of them make any comments about my wife at all because I dont want to Lose my shit in front of them all…again. They saw me do it in the hospital with my wife and at her memorial service and all its gonna take is one of these ladies walking up to me with her eyes welling up with tears and that will be it for me. I know the bride is gonna cry as soon as she sees me. Its almost like I dont want to go because I know what will happen bit I cant miss it for the world because the bride has been texting me every week reminding me to come. My Daughter is coming with me for moral support. This is gojng to be tough but I figure if I got through my wifes memorial service I’ll het through this. I just don’t think Ill be staying for the reception, I’m gonna duck out to avoid people feeling awkward around me and me around them.
Thanks for letting me know - I hope it helped you! I understand how overwhelming and isolating becoming a widow can be (I've been there) and I'm so glad that i can share some of my coping strategies. Be sure to watch the other as well!
I believe I am in the chronic stage its been 11 years this month 1/12/24. Im barren as well. Im 63 with no hope. I'm sad, depressed and miserable. No friends or close family who cares, live near by.. I work byt it's a struggle every day and night. Do I really have a future? We were married for 32 years. I still miss him a lot.
Aw Cynthia - I’m so sad to hear this! No hope for 11 years must be a really hard way to exist.😥 You ask if you have a future. I’d say yes absolutely - BUT it’s up to you what that future will look like right? I’m hearing that you are not happy with how things are - so you need to do something different. I’d be more than happy to guide you thru this - let’s get you out of this rut so that you can breathe again!! If you are interested, you can contact me me at Lidia@widowtowidow.coach.
Oh Tracy....I’m so sorry. Do you know that I have a program specifically designed to help widows through their grief so that they can start really LIVING again? Go to my website for more info www.widowtowidow.coach
@@TraceyTraysea I’m sorry to hear that. If you are ready to try something different to get your life back, I have an amazing program that can show you how. And I have different levels of help available depending on what you are looking for. let me know?
@@Wookinpanub235 a 4 wheel drive AND a great sense of humor!! hugs to you! BTW - I have a great road map that can help you through - check it out! www.widowtowidow.coach/THEGUIDE
I have been married for 12 years,I lose my husband in difficult situations was just surprised me,I remember was Saturday night my husband came from work he was really worried,I try my best taking care for him all the tasks needed.when he done we was just chill and talked but he was worried and ask more Questions and told me if he died how I ll survive with his children alone and told me his has feeling he can’t make it tomorrow while still alive and that was true he didn’t make.he woke up in morning and bath and told me to get ready he’s going somewhere so he ll come back to pick me with children to go out but after people came with care his body death.I ll never forget that day was difficult day to me,I remember how he was talking with to night about death,I feel he was saying goodbye to me I didn’t know.that day until now comes to me like memories it has brought me hurts attack and anxiety I feel very lonely but I struggle very much to raise children alone.he died left me with six children.
Your experience is quite relate able with me. My husband died . And i have 1 kid girl to grown up alone. 😢😢 i am financially independent but still facing trouble when i face contradiction situation. My husband was my great motivator. 😊
@@mrsacademy1003 if you are still struggling with your grief, I have a super effective coaching program that can help you. You can go to my website to get more info! www.widowtotwidow.coach
hey - just want to let you know that you do NOT need to be on this journey on your own. There are lots of ways to get support, including through my program which provides specific guidance on how to cope, personal coaching and a community of other widows that you can connect with. If you want to hear more about how I can support you, email me at Lidia@widowtowidow.coach
I’m so sorry for your loss.Be very cautious about the chronic stage. You don’t want to get stuck there. And look - there’s no reason that you need to figure this all out on your own. I’m here to help if you want! Go to www.widowtowidow.coach and message me.
Hi Christine - you’re right about that - dating again is just hard anyway, but then finding someone who can not only RELATE to what your are going thru (ONLY someone who has lost their partner can actually relate) but that person also has to figure how to leave space for your deceased person to still be a part of your life (and their) life. That is a challenge. But not unreachable. Best of luck!
@@widowtowidowcoachYou are correct on all points. My mom went through this, she was inconsolable for awhile, I couldn’t stand to see her suffer, I helped out.
Hi Kathy - I get that feeling of being totally lost. How are things working out now? Just to let you know that there there is support available - I can guide you through this! Reach out!
Hi Dianne, that's the physical shock your body is feeling. What was your anchor and physical life/ live support system is now gone and your nervous system is in melt down. I had it really bad for about 8 months up to the first year. It's a bit less now & I do stretching every day to Reiki music to regain my focus. ❤
Attention please! Thank you! Would the person who declared that there are Five Stages of Grief, please raise your hand? Thank you! Hi! I think that a lot of us feel that we would like to add to your list, please? Those of you who can add to this list, please share a Stage of Grief you ha😢ve experienced that is not listed here because I want to know what’s coming. LOL! FunnyNotFunny.Loneliness. Panic. Primal Fear (that stage where we are super aware that we are alone and must tend to our own safety when we are out alone). Cocooning (isolation). Guilt (woulda-shoulda-coulda). Self-medicating. Comfort seeking. Spiritual searching. Confusion. Vulnerability. Hoarding. Purging (garage sale, donations, etc.) Not Dating. Dating Apps. Dating again. Dating App Trauma. LOL! Then my whole list starts over again. 😂. I have to laugh. It’s my last cling to sanity. You think I’m kidding. LOL! What would you add to this list?
Hi Laura!! LOVE THIS SO MUCH I don’t even know where to start! It’s * so easy* to break it up into 5 sections, right? The truth is that so many people offering grief advice for widows haven’t actually experienced it. I know that "how can I manage I’m so overwhelmed/pulled in too many directions/what the hell is going on/can I just get a few minutes the BREATH" feeling. It’s SO MUCH. And we are NEVER prepared for it. If you are looking for a guide to help you through, please let me know! I’ve helped so many other widows already - I’d love to help you too. ❤
Widow's need to refrain from dating someone who is ALIVE after losing a spouse. You'll always be less of a person than "he" was. Been there and done that. Run, guys!! I played this stupid game for 5 years--it does not change!!
