First thing is getting a legal Living Trust written by a lawyer that understand how Medicaid works and this protect what assets you can protect. As soon as my husbands cognition began to be effected we got our Living Trust updated, sold our 5 acre homestead and began downsizing. Then depending on your state anything in HIS NAME will be seized for his care center costs. We moved to a community with pretty good senior services and a great senior center and a MAX bus so he can have rides for his independence. (He no longer drives.) You will keep the family home and your vehicle. So this means his pension, his IRA, his vehicle etc. We started to spend down my husband's IRA to pay for our condo mortgage and HOA fee. This also means I will not have to manage a rural property (grass mowing/leaf pickup/snow blowing, large garden) all on my own. This trust protects my IRA and my savings that is my name only. I know (first hand) it is hard to see the money you worked so hard to set aside and save but there is no way that the government can pay for everyone's care center...that is just not possible. So make you plans now.
This country is a shit show. My mother and I have reached our breaking point with my stepfather who has dementia. He is almost too much for TWO of us to handle and his biological children won’t help us financially. I have autism and can’t work. We are barely getting by paying bills and putting good on the table… I can’t believe how hard my mother works to make sure we all survive and it disgusts me to know that things will only get harder when we have to put him in a home or leave him in the custody of his children. I’m terrified of the toll the stress is taking on her and I know she’s scared, too. I have no idea how anyone can think so fondly of this nation… I should be able to take care of my mom but I can’t even support myself… so we take care of him, together, and do the best we can. I can’t even begin to think about the possibility that someday she will need to go into care and… well… I will be alone and I’ll be even more fucked than we are now. Living the American dream…
