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@ Doamino41 I'm not justifying the hate of modern women but women today hate men because they are unable to admire them . They hate them because men do not dominate them anymore.
I just realized that I say some of these things to my husband. My intentions were never to tear him down, but I understand how my words could be taken that way. It really hurts me to know that I hurt him. Thank you for this video.
@Satchel McQueen Video That stinks. Don't let your wife treating you like crap depress you. She is judging you as if she can read your mind which only God can do. When she puts you down stop caring. When that doesn't work for her she might wake up. But do not get offended that she thinks so low of you because if you remove the significance of the offense that stops the cycle and you can be a man that is unmovable. Your wife may be mean as hell, but she will start to respect you more. You can set boundaries and tell her that when she does or says X it makes you feel disrespected and uncared for or whatever and that you aren't ok with that. Then ask her if she thinks it is ok to talk to you like that. If she says ok then she is admitting she is a monster.
Steelmonger888 maybe so but she is holding herself accountable and I am sure she will apologize and do better. Many women are not properly instructed on how to be a good wife before getting married. I’m glad these videos exist!
@Steelmonger888 ....forgive and continue to forgive. Human are not perfect. She could be a really good person and good wife and great mother. The most important is she's willing to change and avoid to use words that Debbie's mentioned in this video.
Love him, respect him, but especially-especially show him your appreciation for all the wonderful things he does for you. Open up to him and tell him often " thank you " and "you are wonderful to me " Women can certainly do all the above and should not hesitate.
No woman is ever honest or appreciative toward their husband or partner. Then, everyone wonders why the divorce rate is so high. When a woman can't show appreciation the guy needs to say goodbye
It's a power play, and nearly all wives who grew up in the Feminism era love to insult & joke about their husbands, and encourage their girlfriends to do it. (Mine does it, and enjoys it thoroughly.)
@@elwoodblues9613 You shouldn't have to suffer under it. Make it known to her that it is hurtful, disrespectful, humiliating, etc. (as you feel is accurate), and that you would like her to stop. If she does not love or respect you enough to stop, then I would reccomend counselling. First by a wise and trusted pastor or church friend(s) if you're Christian, but also by a professional councillor (Christian is still better here, as you'd best want one that doesn't consider divorce an option in anything but extreme cases, if you want to fix the problem). Best of luck to you. God bless you and your marriage.
I grew up in a household where the things Debbie is talking about was the norm. I married a woman that "always" did those things too... that marriage ended terribly. After learning a lot about how God created marriage and realizing His expectations for me, I was able to have the correct expectations for a wife and what characteristics to avoid in women. I'm very happily married to an amazing woman that respects me and builds me up constantly! I never knew that marriage could be so wonderful!!!
I’m sharing this with my wife. I’ve heard some of these and many others myself. I’m the husband who works at night and comes home and there’s no meal waiting on me. I help a lot around the house but to her it’s not enough.
Same, I've heard everyone I'm sure. I'm required to come home some nights and cook a meal for the entire family. She's gotten to the point where she works only 2 days out of the week, yet we put her through master's degree so she barely doesn't have to work, WTH? I get it, I need her for our children, as I'll agree I can't provide for them like a mother can, but I'm not seeing any reason after at this point.
@@unsearchablethings8167 I wish I could say that is all I deal with but not even close. She is very upset at me for only bringing home 87k per year. It's tough.
@@Bloom2Growthere is a difference between holding someone accountable and disrespecting them. Insulting, criticizing, or abusing someone is not holding them accountable.
Michael C also: Proverbs 21: 9 "It is better to dwell in the corner of a housetop than in a house with a contentious woman." Proverbs 21:19 It is better to dwell in the wilderness than with a contentious and angry woman. Check this outru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-IpxAcyBCEJY.html
"her ways are moveable, that thou canst not know them" Proverbs 5:6 STRONG accurate language from someone who had countless sexual partners and hundreds of kids.
I left my ex wife because she did most of the things you listed here. Luckily for me, I stayed in shape and in generally good looking, so I was able to find another woman that actually respects and cherishes me.
Hello, brother! The first time I saw this video I was married, and I learned that she was not my wife. I didn't show her the video. Years later I got remarried, and now my new wife compares me to other men, especially because I don't earn much money, while her exes did. Now I feel like I didn't progress or learned anything in those years of singleness, because I'm being told the same things. So it makes me hate myself even more. I'm also thinking of putting my wife in the same category as my ex. But I don't know. Any suggestions?
You so hit that exactly right. I earn 250K a year, spend next to nothing on myself (I get my clothes and glasses at the goodwill etc) and give my wife of 35 years every penny and it is never enough. At this point we live in the same house but sleep apart. We are cordial to one another. I have never nor will I cheat on God with another because it is to Him my vows were made. However, my wife has managed to get what she wanted, a detached walking wallet. The lack of appeciation by wives today is endemic. American modern women will have God to answer to.
Jr None I'm so sorry I advise you to continue praying for your wife and for the lord to convict her heart so that his desires may become her desires for a better marriage God bless you :)
Although I am not a Christian, however as Muslims, we do share many common core moral values with Jews and Christians. Thank you for sharing these valuable principles, I really appreciate it. May God continue to bless you and your husband.
I can’t like this enough. Lady you are influencing me to end this marriage. I’m always being put down and all these phrases are being used on me all the time. I work 90 hr weeks and provide everything for her. She hates me but loves to order me around. It’s good to know that there are clear thinking women in the world. Thank you, god bless
Be the man and put her in her place. Don't you know she is subject to you in ALL things (Ephesians 5:24)? Don't you know she must REVERENCE you (Ephesians 5:33)? Don't you know you rule over her (Genesis 3:16)?
@@kartboarder22g17 I don't care if she disagrees until she's blue in the face with orange polka-dots! As the husband, he should lovingly acknowledge her disagreement but remind her that HE is the head of the household according to Ephesians 5:23, HE rules over her according to Genesis 3:16 and that she WILL obey. If she doesn't want to obey a husband then she should have stayed single and not gotten married. Truth! 😄 I know my answer probably upset you, so go ahead and respond. 🤓
@@dennisallende7214 It doesn't mean she doesn't deal you divorce papers though, my friend thought the same thing as you and they have been divorced for years. What if you were two non-Christian people and the husband became a Christian and the Wife didn't telling her Bible text may or may not do anything for you. What if you both thought you were Christians, but didn't know the bible at least the verses you are quoting ahead of time before you got married and she doesn't care. Women have a lot of divorce power now days what do you do call her, out and then she will just say get lost?
@@kartboarder22g17 If she chooses to divorce and leave, then BYE-BYE!! SHE'LL be the one that has to stand before the Lord someday and account for divorcing her husband because of her hardened heart! WHO CARES if she has "divorce power"? 😆😆 Next question! 😎
Debbie, Awesome words of wisdom. So nice to hear a woman acknowledging this Behavior. Had to live with it for years before the ex divorce me and continues to try and keep it up to me and the children even now. I never believed any of it and neither do my children. I was lucky enough to have strong family support and Friends. Prior to being married I had 25 plus years of everybody telling me I was one of the best human beings that ever met. If it wasn't for that I probably would have bought into what she was telling me. It wasn't until about a year after she left the second time that the children's counselors brought to my attention that she was a narcissist. I honestly believe that anyone who continuously rips somebody down does it because they feel insecure about themselves and actually are jealous and feel that whoever they ripping down is a better human being than they are. Doesn't matter if it's a man woman or child there is no excuse for a constant barrage telling somebody that they can never do anything right. Hopefully more men and women will take your advice and the institution of marriage will grow strong again. God bless you for attempting to bring it to everyone's attention.
I really believe that the Lord showed me that the absence of respect always accompanies the absence of love. No exceptions. For example, You love your child but also respect them that they are a gift from God. To love them doesn’t mean they have any authority.
Thank you, ma'am. As a young husband, I pray and Hope that my wife, and future children will never see me as a failure. I will do my best to be a great leader, Husband, Father, Uncle, Brother, Man, to my family. Thank you for your encouragement.
My wife has said so many things to me that I would never say to her. I’ll admit that I have not always been the best husband and father , I have adhd and my wife has high anxiety and she says I’m never going to change my attitude. I’m trying to be a chef and I work about 86 to 94 hours a week I was over looked for a promotion that I deserved. I come home and the son is out of control and the wife is not happy with herself and it feels like I can never make myself feel better. I feel valued at work but not anymore and now when I go home I never expect my wife to be in a good mood or happy about the house idk. I take medication but I still feel like I’ll never be the person she wants. I’m man enough to admit that I mess up a lot and dont think correctly. I’m never touched or hugged I feel or pulled over for a kiss. Son won’t get off his iPad ever and wo t listen. I’m told by her that how can she be nice to me when she says I’m not nice to her. I’m nice and then she finds something that makes her upset and angry or the house doesn’t look messy out to her it’s a disaster. I’m not going to let my family break. Idk why but she always says when he’s 18 she’s leaving me. And she doesn’t care if she says this stuff infront of him….I’ll make the changes that I need to.
Guy here My situation was not as bad as yours However lots of similarities Mine X had ADHD so I do get you I cut her alot of slack at certain times of the day as I figured out her med regime Yes, I too made mistakes Tried to own up to them whether she pointed them out to me or not Anyway, we are not together anymore I never wanted this divorce So many inconsistencies Blessings to You on Your Journey 😢😢
Wow, this is one wonderful lady, her husband is incredibly fortunate to have such an insightful and sensitive lady for a wife! If more females were like her, the divorce rate would drastically plummet and MGTOW would cease to exist. How refreshing to see that there are some terrific women out there.... If more single females were like her guys would be entirely different. You've got to admire this sweet woman, she's nothing less than incredible! 💕😊
@Dee Cee In God's eyes , the women are guilty of filing for divorce in droves but husbands are guilty of not ruling over their wives anymore as he said in Genesis 3:16.
@Dee Cee How can you be a Christian if you cannot forgive an offense made to you ? You used the " man cheating" stuff which is not biblical in order to justify divorce , unbiblical again . This is what modern day feminized Christianity is told but this is not what the Bible teaches . If the cheating stuff harms you , you are offended . So , what should any offended Christian do ? Forgive . Divorce is the modern feminist easy way out but God does not allow women to divorce ! The one who could divorce would be the man , as head of the covenant . Yet , Christ tells him NOT to put aside what God has joined . Let alone the woman . Do you get it now ? If our husband turns to another woman once but still comes back to us , he does not divorce . So , who are we to divorce ?? We may feel offended , of course , but we have to forgive his offense . Remember that in biblical times , many men had more than one wife .
@@framboise595 that is one of the curses and consequences of Adam and Eve eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Please go back and read that in context.
I have an arrogant wife. It’s amazing how battle hardened you get and how you learn how to tune it all out and fear the people who can truly hurt you and not the one can only hurt you emotionally. I’ve learned over the past 20 years that women are the aggressor of the species, overall.
Over the years my wife supported other side in my conflicts and disputes even if i was a victim in the scenario. Sometimes by giving a negative statements about my point of view or the way i dealt with situations or encouraging the other person or opinion . Which made felt bad . Sometimes I felt that may be Im a failure . Till I realized That I am in a relation with a toxic person but it was quite late . Now i don’t damn care . As i don’t share any personal info as well as my opinion to her . I feel happy snd more comfortable . I always felt need of sharing ideas and discussion but that was my bad.
The more a wife guilts a husband for not mind-reading or meeting some expectation that he never knew a thing about, the less that husband will put effort into any future of the relationship. Also, the more effort I put into something, the more there is a focus on what I failed to do.
Not religious at all, but I can admire at the core what she's saying. You really shouldn't talk to EACH OTHER in that manner. I'm working hard, spending time to support my family and she is working in the home doing the same. Equal partnership. Equal respect.
(I am a man). I clicked on your video for fun, ok let's hear this, lol...but after listening to what you had to say...Wow, I have to thank you for all of mankind. Thanks. You speak wise words and I agreed with everything you said. I wasn't expecting that but...you stand out in the crowd. Most women do not talk like you do. What're you, some sort of Proverbs 31 Wife or something? I've never actually seen one of those before. All women should watch your video. Does your husband know what he has? Ohh but he's a lucky man. Not even 95K views in over 4 years?! Oh come on on now girls, this video is gold. Thank you, Mam. :)
Never ever say you should have done x. Should have is in the past and none of us can change that. Your either working WITH your husband, or, your working against him.
Thank You wise lady your husband is extremely lucky to have you! I didn't realize how depressed I have been in my marriage, until I watched your video(denial I suppose). I actually held back a tear or 2😐, my wife(of 12 years) has been doing this to me since I can last remember...
Listen to this at times, and just the thought that someone out there is even thinking the way you do helps me to find peace and happiness, thank you for your kind example.
My mother belittles my father in private and in public. It makes me sick. I once made the mistake of disagreeing with my husband in front of company and vowed to myself that I would never undermine his authority in public or in the privacy of our own home front of our children, friends or family. If there is something I need to discuss with him, I do so in private between ourselves.
Things that aren't said.. Neglect Rejection Ignore Loss of affection Or just playing on your phone when I walk in the door after work and not even looking up to say (how was your day) Or (Glad you are home) Damm right I am planning an exit strategy!!!!!!!
Marriage is work you have to ask yourself wither your making time to be together too, and if its just he talk to her as one adult to another and see what the problem is, modern technology is just a new challenge for relationships not every handles well, Ive played LOL man! If all else fails then seek divorce (im not assuming you have tried these things)
@@framboise595 I thought the womans meant to be the master of the house lol but cut the crap power shouldn't be given to one, all that's needed is mutual respect, communication and co-operation, its how so many people have relationships now, the divorce rates gone down to early 40% by the way.
@@informationyes A wife is to submit o to her husband in everything because the husband IS the head of the wife . Mutual respect , communication and cooperation never work with no head ! f the man is not in control , the woman will usurp the power seat very quickly and things will get awful . There is nothing funny . When a man lets his wife be the master of the house , he gets into big troubles and is no man anymore. Don't ever expect a woman who does not regard you as the head of the house to respect you because she will automatically feel superior . Women need to be in subjection , to be subjugated _ literally sub_jugated ie under the yoke - to respect and love a man .
I remain against divorce because the Word of God is against divorce, allowing it reluctantly in only two cases. However, there is a point in a toxic marriage where one needs to ask which is the lesser of two evils: being divorced, or staying in a marriage that cannot please God. For that reason, I don't criticize divorced Christians, because I don't know the back story, and I may have reacted the same way.
Glory Hallelujah! Thank you for this! It's because so many women don't treat their men well and don't believe in lifting up their men that I'm still single! Maybe I can find a good woman like you!
My husband talks to me like this! It’s been 14 years of my love, respect and dedication. Divorce is the best solution in my case. Toxic people, men or women should ended up all alone! 😏🇧🇷
Actually I prefer honesty even if at first it hurts. My soon to be ex wife has said to me that she wishes her dead husband was still alive so she can be with him. She was embarrassed to let her friends know she was married to me. I'll never fall in love again, what a chump I was.
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@@petermonn8352 you need Jesus and you need to repent of your sins and cry out to him and ask him to forgive you and give you a heart and soul and mind to him and serve him
My dear, coming from a man...we adore you, we love you and its people like you we will die for because you are beautiful to us and to the world. Bless you always.
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Caroline Watts you're such a sweetheart you realised your mistakes. I thank you for that. & please don't worry. It's not over yet. You can make a comeback & be a wife who would admire her husband for the things he has done. But you need to hurry a little. May god bless you & bring your husband back into your arms! ❤️
Men: do everything you can to become financially independent as soon as possible so you won't have to think about unimportant things. Hint: 'unimportant things'.
I’ve said ALL of those words to my husband. We’ve been together for 16yrs & sadly, our marriage is hanging by a thread. Asking for prayers & that I may make a rapid change to be a Godly wife. I struggle with pride & it’s hurting our relationship.
The only time I feel like a failure is when I would think of he woman I CHOOSE to marry. It's the ONLY thing I really failed at in life. Other than that I succeeded.
I am now a disrespectful wife but I had respect for him until he broke my heart. Now I don't know how to respect him again or show him respect. I feel awful after i say terrible things to him.
@@cmthoughts4803 Thank you. I don't know how to manage this pain but I don't want to be so mean either. The things that I have said diminishes my femininity. So I end up being disappointed in myself n still being angry at him. I will try.🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
@@cmthoughts4803 Thank you you are exactly right. I need to take a breath n sometimes just don't speak until I get control over my emotions. So I won't have to feel so guilty n make him feel so bad. 🙏🏾
Where can I find a woman like THIS??!!!??? I will take a plane to anywhere I can meet women with these values. @ long last... We need more good women like this one. Respect.
Im a Union Carpenter, I build America,..commercial buildings, schools,hospitals, and my Ex Wife told me to get a "Real" job,because i didn't make the same $$ she did at her job. Good Riddance.
Respectfully, She Is Right. Kindly, Wives / Mates, Should Be The Soft Place For Your Husband To Land, Trust, Cherish & Passionately Embrace. Thank You For Reminding Us. :)
I came across this great message in a blog I do not remember the name and I would like to share it with you : " A woman's submissive conduct can communicate in a way that reaches deeper into a man's heart and mind more deeply than words alone can accomplish and thus can achieve more than a great many words, and also that submissive obedience is extremely attractive and therapeutically calming for a troubled soul. When a man takes the headship in a relationship (i.e., he takes the role that God intended him to have) a woman will find that it creates some sort of deep resonance within her and in a similar way, when a woman takes the role God intended for her (that of submitting to her man) there will be a corresponding and undeniable resonance within the man's soul. It is something like the genuine smile, the genuine hug of affection ... you might not know or be able to articulate exactly why it should influence you positively, but something happens at a subconscious level that cannot be avoided and, ultimately, cannot be denied."
frexandbera Vinc What he said is biblically based. You cannot refute the Bible when it comes to marriage. Read all the verses on the right column in full context: www.qbible.com/references/ephesians/5-22/
***** A man must be humble enough to be ruled over by Christ ( God) and proud enough to not let his wife rule over him. A man was created by a God of ORDER as well. Men with no egos are not men anymore. They are like little boys in front of mommy wife. Male ego is necessary to hold families together.
Wow- my ex wife was guilty of all the demeaning things mentioned in the video. Most had no idea just how mean my ex was. I left her. She was also cheating on me again-yes 'again'. Some months after, she apologized. She regretted her bad choices. We are least on friendly terms but her sorrows are hers alone to bear. I am free.
My wife and I were out with a group of friends, and because I didnt cut short my conversation with a friend and jump to the bar to fetch her another drink (everybody else had 1/2 to 3/4 of theirs left by the way) I was told I was an embarrassment to be out with, because she was left without a drink when everybody else had one.
My wife does those kind of things in different ways. I think it's their deep insecurity issues and constant need to feel validated. They need to seek that from God.
I think most important thing is a take care of each other. They have to show up there feelings to each other. Arrogance and proudness will never last your family. Family means a team and you should both need to be faced challenges togather.
That's why men have mistresses. When they start to nag, move on. And they really don't like hearing the same criticism again and again. Women: if he is so bad, why did you marry him?. Or do both of you a favor and leave.
Debbie, you should do another version of this now that Covid-19 has created a lot of jobless husbands who are stuck at home. The whole “you NEVER”... “you don’t make enough money...” and the like is probably destroying a lot of men’s spirits. Another line is “you are USELESS”. That one is a killer.
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Wow! I have told my wife soooo many times that I have concluded I can make a million dollars a month and it wont be enough. I have told her I can't work any more constant overtime than I am right now. I made more money last year than I ever in my life thought I would and still feel financially strapped. The pressure to provide and grow a carrier for those at home. Still I feel I'm only just the family member that goes to work to provide while family takes place while I'm gone. It's like a marriage that's just a financial agreement roommate type understanding.
Strangely enough this is incredibly accurate. My in-laws love to using biblical references to get their way, but when I use this reference to stop my wife from verbally tombstoning me I am in the wrong. I’m at a point now where my heart and soul have been thrashed by my wife and she uses my daughter as a pawn to have things her way. It is becoming more clear why men have higher rates of suicide.
Been married 28yrs. The last 20 have been painful emotionally. All these things are said to me, and I started keeping track of the negative comments. One week, consisted of 40 negatives. And don’t think I don’t help around the house. I DO IT ALL!!! Cleaning, yard work, car maintenance, laundry, cooking. I’m exhausted. As for intimacy, forget it! It’s been over 4 years, and the last time she started any intimate contact with me was around 1998. I finally broke down. I tried to hug her one day in the kitchen, and she pushed me away. She said “what’s wrong with you!” I felt a darkness envelope me. And I had an affair. I’m not condoning my actions, I’m just giving my perspective of my breaking point. I’ve ended the affair, and an seeking professional counseling. I implore to you ladies, your words and actions hurt men more than you realize. And as for my affair, I’m so ashamed, and regret my actions. Everyday is a struggle, and I pray for strength and forgiveness.
Thank u very much. The message u gave definitely applies both ways though. A man should build up and respect his lady as well. And he shouldn't say those type of things to her either
Thank You Debbie. Thank you for admonishing women to live their Husband as Titus 2 instructs is. One of the biggest problems in the body is not only the attack the submissive wives via the spirit of feminism but the shortage of bold Wise woman who confront these issues. God is calling us all higher.
I'm not married, but I think this should go both ways. Underappreciation seems to be a big marriage killer, although too much attention might also be bad.
Amen! Here’s the truth, “from the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks”. Talking down, insulting, name calling, disrespect, lack of love, attention, and support... men will put up with it for a while. Once they’ve had enough, they will leave. One thing my wife does is say “you guys” and then goes on to say something “corrective”, while taking to me and my teenage son. She lumps me into the mix like I’m one of the children. My reply is usually “There is no ‘you guys’, I’m not a child. So if you have something you need to say to me, then say it to me. But don’t lump he and I together, because you’re not talking to two children.” Always, every, and never are universals and, frankly, they’re lazy. When my wife uses these words with me I simply say “that’s not true. You’re using that as a universal term in order to exaggerate this single issue.” At the heart of a lack of disrespect is really a lack of love and gratitude.
When my wife said these things and made horrible false accusations about me over and over and over.....I resorted to horrible name calling. I am sorry I did that. But does that make me a bad person when I was pushed and pushed?? She brings up my mistakes from the past like 3 to 5 to 8 years ago all the time.
I see mostly men in the comment section, but a few women also, and with positive comments, even one saying thank you and " i need to change ". Great job . God bless you.
I'm going through this right now. Don't know what to do. So I had to swallow my pride and call my day last night just to tell me that it's normal and I shouldn't worry. I can relate.
@Frank Garrett+ It was a simple comment. No one was being disrespectful aside from you. It is 100% true; respect goes both ways, and when it doesn't, people like YOU arrive and spout immature garbage to try and prove a point...
I contend that if a woman was respecting and submiting to her husband like the Bible reveals. Then he would not say any of those things to his wife. Especially if he knows the Lord.
@ John Schulz There is no such thing as mutual respect in the Bible. Respect is the wife towards the husband , not the opposite. Because respect implies total submission .
In other words. Proverbs 14. 1. Every wise woman builds her house. But a foolish one tears it down with her own hands. Me and my wife both we was over by consequences of these words. Congratulations for the video..
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Best thing she ever said was “You provided a good retirement.” Worst things...I don’t respect you”, “You will have to prove yourself to me”, “I am jealous of you”. She divorced me. She didn’t work. Claims I abandoned her. She is now a millionaire with a house. Thank God I worked enough to take care of myself. I’m delivered and she is unhappy.
I can't say all men feel like failures but men do not like to be called a failure and don't like to be compared to other men..."Yeshua / Jesus is the way "
Never do for a woman what she can do for herself. Help is one thing, but when its handed to her she will expect it. When my wife asks me to do something she knows Ill get it done and always says thankyou. I ask for her help also but dont Expect it. She knows I am a shaker and a mover and I am intent on getting done whats important but there are things I like to do ( hobby) and she Never interferes. We discuss purchases and life changing events but my decision is final. My Momma raised me to think critically and make choices and live with them. She realized that the approach to raising a boy was vastly different than that used for girls. A good woman can teach a boy every good principal and virtue so he becomes a real man, and not an effeminate mindless twit that becomes a doormat for women. We as men should never be afraid of being alone. Im not!
This is where 99% of our fights start. I rarely initiate a fight with my wife. It usually begins with my wife scolding me about something, or strongly questioning me about something. The way a mother questions a teen who was out late.
@ Andrew Pena It is always women who initiate fights because they are psuhed to challenge their husband's authority instead of submitting and surrendering. The war of the sexes is a woman's thing , not a man's thing. It started in Eden with the woman usurping the man's authority and screwing our earthly paradise.
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Don't Nag..its that simple, ask whats wrong if you see him in a bad place and shows it on his face. Stand in front of him while asking and do something like hold him by the arms rubbing them, look into his eyes and give an understanding look maybe depending on the mood or setting and your unique relationship dynamic a playful but sincere peck on the lips, or running your fingers through his hair, a touch, something like that to show some affection. Ask and listen. How he'll respond is how well you know him and each other. If he says oh nothing he may well be hiding it because he doesn't want to hurt or upset either of you. 9/10 times men are afraid to do stuff incase it makes their partners mad at them. Sorry ladies, your just going to have to treat him like an adult more often, and remember this is a partnership even if he doesn't always seem to be pulling his weight 100% of the time or on his best, let go of the reigns a little, I know its hard for you especially, you want that consistent security and certainty in everything..but honestly...that's called being a control freak...and its gonna break you up, I know from experience. Trust is the keyword, learn to read the moment, don't panic or go off the handle and get over emotional or over react this raises cholesterol unknowingly in us to prepare us for fight or flight, over time with more and more drama it takes its toll on the liver and degrades our health, couple that with long work days and stresses, the last thing a man needs..is a nagging partner, cheers.
When I first got married I said to my wife that neither of us should ever use the expressions: 'you never' or 'you always' and she agreed. However she has used both regularly throughout our marriage.