You'll quit Jiu-Jitsu because of this, by Professor Ryron Gracie. DON'T MAKE THIS MISTAKE! 

Feels so different when Rener isn’t there to cut him off mid sentence

"Comparison is the thief of joy." - unknown - good one.

The most confusing thing about this video is why they hung the picture on a pillar when they have a nice flat wall.

Money, boredom, injury, goals reached, toxic environment, moving away, family life, etc. There are many reasons why people "quit".

49-year-old practitioner here. Got my purple belt this March. I had a realization a while back that REALLY took the mental pressure off and made my training even more enjoyable than it already is. One of the problems you run into as you advance is that fewer of your training partners can really push you, and the pool of people you get meaningful training time with gets smaller, particularly if you're in a smaller town or smaller gym. But that's the REALLY cool thing about new students that rocket past you. Your selection of effective training partners stays fresh. And if those young bucks that progress faster have certain mental or physical gifts, so much the better. You have more and varied ways to push yourself than you would have otherwise. It's like strength training - you can't build muscle playing around with the same old weight - you need progressive overload. So when you have a kid that's been training half the time you are start tuning you up, that is NOT the time to start doubting or feeling sorry for yourself. That partner just became your most valuable training asset, because they're bringing something new to the table that's only going to strengthen your entire gym. Shift your focus away from what makes you feel good, and learn to enjoy what pushes you to the edge. That's where it's at. PS: I am not - repeat, AM NOT - talking about training crazy and trying to match the athleticism of younger folks. Your first priorities should be injury prevention and harm reduction, followed by precision, efficiency, and control. Find your limits, but be smart about it. 😉

Their is usually one person in every class that thinks they are in the UFC when they are rolling.

I just started bjj right before the lockdown. I only have about a dozen classes under my belt and theres only 3 things I focus on with bjj. 1-show up 2-try your hardest 3- be respectful. I trust things will fall into place in due time if I keep doing that. Cant wait for my bjj school to open up again.

Wise words. Comparing myself to others is exactly what broke my desire to train.

I trained for 2 years and got my blue belt and then my goals in life changed, I started working 70-80 hrs a week to buy a house for my family. Now I’m in a more stable place and now my four year old, my wife, and myself are training. That line “comparison is the thief of joy” I believe I heard Bill Johnson from Bethel Church in Redding, CA say that.

Social media doesn't help sometimes. You see all these awesome people and expect yourself to be able to be as good when maybe they train 4 hrs a day 7 days a week, are half your age and dont have other responsibilities.

I think it’s all down to the instructors. If they promote a healthy, fun, safe BJJ environment I’d wager that their students stick around far longer than the ones that don’t.

The anecdotal answer that I have is the environment I trained in. We had maybe 5 students, all of which weighed more than I did. So when we would grapple, they never beat me with technique, they beat me with their strength. I wasn't advanced enough to beat them with my technique, so I would just take a beating while trying to learn. I would get picked up and slammed, slung around, and sometimes even getting struck when we wouldn't allow striking in most sessions. I got more hurt grappling than I ever had sparring. So my growth was stunted because my mentality was just to survive the round by bracing for impact and trying not to get injured. I love Jiu Jitsu, but my environment caused it to have a sour taste in my mouth.

This is interesting. When I've been faced with someone whose trained for less time and is better than me, I always think "Did you expect to be the MOST gifted Jiu Jitsu practictioner when you started? No." Yet I can't help but go to that place mentally when other climbers fall in the same category. I needed to hear this.

I’ve been training bjj for 12 years and I’m still a blue belt. Took a break for 4 years due to a divorce. Now that I’m re married and have a kid I have been back for 2 years. I currently run my own business as a truck driver and my job is super physical. I’m trying to save for a house and also weight train. Every time I go jitz which is once or twice a week I get a stiff neck or some sort of injury that makes me hate my life the next day. I find it hindering my life and causing unnecessary pain. I am thinking about quitting permanently or at least stop until my situation changes. Don’t feel bad to quit or take a break guys. It’s your life and no one can shame you for living it how you want to. Stay safe.

This mind set is so incredibly helpful and unfortunately it is discouraged in most schools. I find more opportunities to learn and enjoy rolling when I implement his perspectives of JiuJitsu.

I quit because I was paying $150 a month and got eye gouged by a blue belt and had to spend $600+ to fix my eye. In Judo, I only pay $45.

F. Scott Fitzgerald - "Comparison is the thief of joy"

Gym bullying. Getting older and body can't bang any more. Jiu jitsu Has just become a festival of popularness because of the tournament scene . i hate tournaments. Not everyone is a competitor.

I quit Jiu jitsu because I kept getting soft tissue injuries. My day job requires a lot of me physically. That and my gym was focusing on competitive applications rather than practical self-defense.

side control is the cause of 95% of people quitting jiujitsu lol

Let’s be honest: jiu jitsu is HARD. It’s hard physically and emotionally. I sometimes have to force myself to go just knowing the amount of work it is and that I’m going to get my neck cranked to hell.

I listen to a guy named Jordan Peterson all the time. I really like him. He has a statement where he says compare yourself to who you were yesterday instead of who someone else is today. I have always thought that for martial arts, especially for kids, part of the mantra should be something along the lines of I train to compete against who I was yesterday. Or something along those lines. Haven’t worked out the exact words for it but U get the idea. Great video by the way.

good lesson on ability to teach vs rank, id much rather a good purple belt teacher vs a black belt that can't

I spent lots of time and money. Even went on a Gracie cruise. Finally went to a convention in Atlantic City NJ where I was rolling with an opponent while Royce Gracie was at our feet. We finished and he told us we both got our blue belts. Me and this stranger looked at each other and were amazed. No one gave us a belt. When we asked, we were told we could go buy one. I was quite a disappointment.

As an older person starting it was difficult to roll with younger people trying to prove how good they were. I was trying to survive instead of learning the moves at my own pace. Plus seems I was getting hurt every other lesson roiling too hard. That was my take.

This is so true, I still do this and let it get to me. Thank you for this video. Thank you.

I have fun. I started martial arts 20 years ago and I still enjoy it. So many layers. I noticed very few people last.

I disagreed initially. The injuries and getting stuck at blue belt for an indefinite future were the reasons I would’ve chosen initially. But after thinking about this, I think he’s right. It just stops being fun. There are a lot of reasons that could happen but that’s the overarching point.

Injuries must be a big factor as well. I’m a mailman and I’ve contemplated quitting many times because I can’t get injured again. I love it, I love training. The injury factor is so stressful for me.

I called it! Fun! First thing you gotta learn is to let it be fun! Then the nerves start becoming excitement. Then the movements start becoming more liquid. You start tapping more because you’re trying more and failing (vs being afraid of failure). Fun was a HUGE turning point for me and it happened after a month-in.

EGO is the problem. So lack of proper guidance of how to deal with your own unique difficulties is what make people quit. They are not quitting BJJ, they are quitting having to deal with something they don't know how to deal with. Their shattered EGO. Their emotions, Their lack of maturity, lack of patience. Every person will have a different psychological monster to deal with. BJJ can be the place were you learn to deal with that monster. But if you don't have instructors looking out for you and trying to understand you for who you are, and what you are trying to do, you might feel lost and hopeless. After a few weeks of that feeling your brain will switch off and excuses will start to creep in without you even noticing. Face your demons, Face your emotions, Face your doubts, Face your limitations with a positive attitude. Whatever happen from there doesn't matter much, and you are now in the right path to fully development as a person. Controlling others shows strength, Controlling yourself shows POWER. Rickson Gracie pedindo pra ser enrolado no tapete de casa para superar sua "claustrofobia" é só mais um exemplo da necessidade de vencer seus próprios demônios.

Honestly, I was getting less injuries in kickboxing. I also got more W's under my belt with the after class sparring. Sometimes it's good to take off for alittle while. Just my personal experience. Still a white belt. Still rolling. Still love it.

Egos of guys coming in day one thinking the instructor will give them a blue belt if they just smash everyone. White belts with little technique and no desire to learn it bit just want to smash people and causing injuries because of it, terrible instructors or no curriculum. Start learning a loop choke on the first day and end up seriously hurt because some guy doesn't understand what a tap is. These are some of the reasons I have seen. Wanna be UFC fighters are the worst.

My Professor saved me from this. He told me fuck those thoughts all you need to do is focus on being a better version of you then you were yesterday. My other Professor saved me by calling me out and told me to just show up. God Bless everyone, keep at it, be better than you were the day before, stay safe OSSSS

Thanks so much for this video. I just got my 1st stripe after 3 months at 55 years. It means a lot

When i show up to any class for martial arts i focus on three things, in this order. 1. Goofing off and having fun with teammates first and foremost. Whats the point if im not having fun. 2. Learning. Trying to improve what i know im not good at. Try to weaponize what i know i am good at. Become a better fighter. Practice the mindset youl take into competition in your sparring. Etc etc. 3. Get in good shape. Happens all by itself so long as you do your best. I dont worry about trophies or medals. The better guy on one day could be a loser on the next. Nothing to be gained from staking your pride and ego off of an object that only means you looked good on a particular day. Ive had losses im more proud of that wins because i knew i learned something vs getting my ego inflated that led to much bigger consequences down the road. I dont worry about belts. Its mentally exhausting thinking of when i might get the next one. Be confident and happy with who you are, not what your wrapping around your waist to keep your pants up. Obviously belts mean something but you know what i mean and when i do advance im obviously happy about it, but i try to keep it out of mind. A lower ranking person can still beat you. A big person who is only half as good can still beat you. The belt doesnt mean all that much, its just a personal milestone marker for you and its only relevant at your school. Dont treat it as anything more than that.

It can be the school environment. Ive seen places if you don’t compete, no one puts any time into helping you. If you just want to do it for fitness, or, God forbid, self defense, “there is something wrong with you.” And if you don’t compete “you can’t fight.” Crap like that.

Can't wait to get back to grappling once we re-open. Striking is one thing, I can keep that sharp on a bag, but many multiple partners are needed to get any better at jiu jitsu and wrestling.

I work rotating schedule days/nights for 12 hrs @ a blue collar job also have 3 kids and a wife, and still manage to stay consistent. Been training for almost 2 years and it is rough. Excuses are easier to make! Can't see life without BJJ

Went to purple belt but got tired of always feeling beat up all the time. Finally just started getting back and this Covid thing kicked up. Hopefully I can get back and stay

The problem with knowing enough BJJ, is that it is a perishable skill. Granted I have only been training 2 years, so much the techniques I have not been introduced to, but the ones I have been are not as sharp as before the COVID shutdown. I would imagine when you stop completely the slow deterioration of your technique leads to massive drops after a few years.

I should have... I shouldn't have... What stories we tell ourselves. I'm enough. I'm whole.

That could be used as a life lessons if people figure it out .

Because of Rener always cutting him and talking all the time I didn’t knew he could express himself so well and was so wise

This would be a better conversation to have with blue and purple belts, not a whole room full of white belts. You could preach to white belts all day long about"keeping it playful", but they haven't stood the test of time yet. I know what he is means by " keep it playful" and don't compare yourself to others, but there are mixed messages in that statement. The core reason you practice anything is to improve at it, and it can be frustrating and discouraging if you don't notice any improvement. It's human nature to want feel as though progress is being made. Not to mention, it can be embarrassing to have lower belts and newer people constantly dominate you.

I needed to hear this thank you my buddy whom I've been training with half of my time as a jiu-jitsu player and as an mma practitioner which is about 2 years now I just saw he got his first stripe on his white belt and I feel like im staying stagnant because my aunt who I live with wants me to stay home cuz of the whole virus thing or whatever and I saw hes making all of these progressions while I'm stuck at home with no one to train with and it was bothering me so thank you

People all have their own Journeys, Maybe a full BJJ lifestyle is not for everyone. There are so many styles that Award a black belt in 1-2 years, (Taekwondo 타관도) Brazillian Jiu Jitsu is different as some people just want the confidence to protect themselves against others (Blue belt will suffice) Not everyone wants to compete in BJJ Tournaments or embrace the Gracie Diet. (I will never become a vegan) so many schools push this, it is becoming like a religion. While I enjoy GJJ I also understand it’s not for everyone. People have priorities and honestly GJJ is not my top priority, I can workout alone. I carry a Gun for defense however GJJ just adds to my non lethal Arsenal. Membership fees can be a problem, Contracts are probably the biggest problem. I can understand why many quit after Blue Belt and I cannot blame them, I chose to keep going but I always remember that GJJ is not even in my top priorities. I realize I will never ever attain Black Belt status and I am ok with that, I have devoted 20+ years of my life Training with the best from Rorion, Royce, Relson as well as others, I should have my black belt however I chose not to worry about this, I have my own journey and priorities. I started Training 3 Months after Ed O’Neil started. I am not into the BJJ for life, this is merely a hobby at this point.

So strange that they put this out. I don't even practice jujitsu. But I had recently been thinking about how internally cancerous comparison can become. It erodes the will and desire to excel, can even lead to depression.

Most important part is, to have fun! If you have fun, you will always have joy at what you are doing.

Imagine comparing yourself to others...and being a Gracie!! They would have all quit thinking they'll never be Rickson.

Completely agree. I stalled at 2 stripes on my blue then had a bunch of great brown belts get their black belt and they moved on. Classes then became less interesting, then injuries, then work, then kids, now I’m done and I really miss it but was glad to have the journey

I came into juijitsu with the mindset of leaving after I get my blue belt, and the reason for that is that I'm trying to get a well rounded skillset, I don't want to be the juijitsu guy, I already have a background in boxing and kickboxing, now when I became good enough at ground fighting I need to start working on my wrestling. That's the mindset I had coming into bjj to be honest. I'm not saying you should do that but I am saying you don't have to be the best bjj guy to defend yourself, if you're a good blue belt your good enough at ground fighting. For me I wanna be well rounded, and I think bjj is the least important skill in self defense and mma, I'd say wrestling and boxing are way more important. But it's still essential to learn bjj

I have trained boxing and bjj together. I quit bjj because it went from $120 to $170 a month in a span of 2 years. I stayed with boxing because its only 50 bucks a month.

Many quit a Martial Art to start with another one, as this is the only way to fully pursue their curiosity and passion. Time comes when an Art, teacher or fellows community has given all they could. Then, you realize further learning is elsewhere. I bet these patrinizing masters never speak this truth out.

Live without having to prove something to anyone or yourself focus on your own individual growth goals self development stay postive fun humble

Thanks dude. I was doing ITF TKD and my 4th dan instructor put me down by saying some stupid shit like “if you do thing to a black belt you will be put down”. My response was like “I would like to see that happen”. I left as he was not supporting myself but others to improve.

Sometimes you just realize that having a man between your legs a few times a week isn't working for you anymore. Might be fun when you are 20 but not so much when you are 50.

The instructors are at the center. I've picked up and dropped many things ive tried. But BJJ is something that I enjoy because the academy I go to promotes family and unity. And all the students I've trained with, even the higher belts are very respectful and eager to teach you. Culture and etiquette is very huge, its hard to retain people when they don't buy into your system. Another reason is lifestyle, let's be honest. Most people that want to lose weight or try anything new quite. Very few people stick to something and make it a part of their life. If you want to stick to BJJ, you have to go for your own reasons. And when doubts kreep up, just show up anyways. Showing up is the hardest part, once you're there its all good.

I quit Jiu- Jitsu because I felt that I wasn't improving. I found out that I was Diabetic so that was the main factor. I was also being made fun of by some people. I was 48 years old when I started and had survived a heart attack. I decided enough of this B.S.

Authoritism - Ancient false doctrines Why is Eddie B so hated, why was it so hard to change, e.g what one wears, why is he so loved by his students, he is the first to start stripping back my first points

If you find a muay thai gym and only spar with smart partners then you will get half the damage you would in bjj. I quit because I was always sore or had a joint tweaked and couldn't work out consistently. The joint and neck/spine damage you risk in bjj is usually a bigger risk to quality of life than boxing or kickboxing is as a hobbyist.

Want to have things that you cant have make you unhappy. Accept the situation and be happy

there is a period in a martial arts journey when you get good quick & then you have a "suck" period that can last a long time. A lot if people quit during that phase.

I think the instructor does make a big difference in understanding that not everyone is there for the same reason. Also, there's opportunity cost. If I go to a 90 minute class, twice a week, that might be 5 hours a week with travel, changing, etc. We all have a finite amount of time and some activities go by the way side.

I stopped at 2:35 to answer this question. I am a white belt since 1994 yup it's true, most of you commenting will beat me badly in Jiu-Jitsu. I love jiu-jitsu like nothing else in this world. I grew up playing football, basketball, soccer, track, wrestled, boxed. I am 46 years old watched more jiu-jitsu tournaments and matches that most people who do jiu-jitsu, nothing to brag about. The reason most people quit is actually complex but I will give you the undoubtedly the most common reason: They lose interest. Anyone including Rener or whoever answers differently than that doesn't understand their clients. Much respect to Ryron and I love his Brother but as Juyama stated, it really is nice to hear to Ryon speak uninterrupted and I am exceptionally happy to see him and hear his words. You can tell he is a natural leader like Rener but he I noticed he has a much more endearing quality about him, he makes you want to listen, he entices you to participate and he demonstrates a unique power and quality to speak purposefully softly and forcing the enticed to listen is more. Rest assured one day, I will get back to it and yes, I am one of the few who never lost interest, I lost my life as I once knew it.

Just because I'm not there anymore, doesn't mean I stopped training. The Basics was too far for me to drive to. That's why I initially changed gyms. But I am still training. Even during the pandemic I am doing what I can. I appreciate having met Ryron and having trained at The Basics. Now I am training on the West Coast, several years after I started at The Basics.

I quit because I just wasn't interested anymore. I lost interest because the gym I was going to was 90 percent sport oriented and that just wasn't for me. I was there to learn self defense and I did a little bit. But after a year or so I just lost all motivation. I tried hard to stick with it and hang in there even though I was getting my ass handed to me lol but I stopped going to that school. I tried to look for other schools around me that were more self defense related and that didn't push competition so much but I was unsuccessful. It sucks because I really miss training and the folks there were very nice. It was a little clickish….but that's ok I guess. He is true about comparing yourself to others though. Hard not to do that.

A month used to be $35, now over $120, a gun is cheaper.

“Keep it playful” written behind Ryron 😎

They stop because there becomes a time where you feel pressure to compete so you leave.

Ryron a very wise guy was blessed to have done a 2 day seminar with him in Singapore

People train in martial arts for interest. But after a year they realize this is a commitment. Training in martial arts you have to build a passion so that you will continue to go.

The majority might stop because of the environment

My father is my sensei in Traditional Shoto Kan karate. I started when I was 5 years old in 1970. In 1981 my father relocated his dojo at the boys and girls club in Ottawa Canada. I was a brown belt. My father had me doing both kids class and adult class when I was 12 years old. We had many people from different arts come and go. They will get their black belt and quit. Why, They already had a black belt from another art. Cool. This way I can learn something new as well. It is called knowledge. Keep what works for you. By the time a person reach green belt or 3 years and they are getting the best out of you. You just found your future champion. Want some don't understand you are performing at max 30% while they are giving all they can. When I became a black belt at age 18. You have to be 18 and over to get your black belt at one time. Now it is 16 at our dojo. Some kids are just that good. I took time off for a couple of years. I was a musician as well. Doing one class A week and not teaching with my favorite sparring partner. Or we call it fight night night. Every Friday. Everyone one invited. All levels. One hour class for the children. 2 hour class for adults. The adults helps the children class show what they can do. And teach it rather then just doing it. I started this at Orange belt level. There are some better Orange and green belt that are better teachers and just less skill. Until they reach black belt they be kicking your butt all over the place. Good fighters, good teachers, are hard to find as one. 20 years at the Boys club. Was my past memories. I was a member of the boys club when I was 10 years old.

Not having someone to practice after class It’s lonely hard to improve. The most important person at the gym it’s our Partners teammate

I think it is mostly injuries hands down....some people get injured and then they can't work and generate income....no income scares them enough to not risk going back and getting injured again

I think the belts have something to do with that. Not all belts are equal... but somewhere, there's supposed to be a standard. So... indeed, the surest way to be miserable is to compare yourself to others, but at the same time, it's okay to compare, and okay if you suck after 20 years (in contrast to others). Don't let that cramp you. That too is part of training. Resilience is broad. You're still alive and get to train. Rejoice. Most people don't ever set foot on a mat.

I never compared myself to anyone in my dojo. It’s the money, the schedule, the kids I have to take care of, and the MONEY! I work graveyard shift (10pm -6:30am).... nuff said. That’s why I quit. I never wanted to quit but I have to make sacrifices to lessen the burden on my finances and health( for no sleep).

This is directly applicable to the battlefield of business also. Stay hungry!

Ryron has such a good philosophy on teaching. I would like to learn from him so that I can achieve a similar jiu jitsu philosophy.

I would agree this is the biggest reason. I almost quit a month in because I wasn't getting it and I was just getting crushed. Then I let go and started having a lot more fun. A year later I still get beaten up a lot, and being a smaller guy makes things difficult, but I've made many friends and am just enjoying my time.

Some people quit because they can’t afford it and unexpected things happen in their lives.

I quit because of the gnarly skin rashes.... staph and ringworm. The mats can be cleaned well but hard to control others coming in dirty. Otherwise I probably would have stuck with it.

I left my BJJ gym because of an injury but also because I made zero friends. As a smaller guy, I felt like the odd man out whenever it was time to partner up. I often had to roll with newbies or women who were big complainers. The few times I made a friend in class who wanted to roll with me, he would quit after a few months. It sucks. No rapport = no money.

i quit bjj at brown belt after running a gym for 7 years and training multiple cage fighting champions, because i turned 40 grew up and just don't care any more about it. your health is important but bjj isn't every thing.

I will start a new job next summer and I want to train in Jiu-jitsu because I want to lose weight, I want to feel good about myself and learn how to defend myself.

Wise words from such a respectful thoughtful person

I wonder if He teaches this to kids... this is a valuable lesson that kids also need to learn

Actually, comparison blew me away and is what drew me to BJJ. I wanted what he had. Knowledge. Experience. it’s addicting...

So it’s your fault not ours. I wish I could answer my business problems that way. Though it’s true, it’s up to business owners to come up with a solution to this problem.

I already knew the answer before he said it because it's exactly what I'm experiencing right now. I'm older, 45, and just learning so I'm rolling with guys more fit and flexible then me. I feel like I can handle newbies like me but when I go against striped white belts I get my a** kicked. I wonder if I'll be able to progress into being competitive rolling with higher belts so I contemplate quitting. However, I don't want to be a quitter so I'm trying to push through and hopefully something positive will come of it.

Everything my new gym coach has to say is with such a condescending attitude and the whole energy in there is so serious and full of ego. Been trying for months to create relationships and bring some fun and positivity but i just can’t seem to overcome it. Killing my heart cause i dont wantto give up

If you don’t enjoy the process, you won’t enjoy the process. If you’re in it to reach a goal like Confidence, you’ll stop. If you enjoy the process of getting better, you won’t skip classes, you won’t short change yourself, you won’t get disappointed if you don’t expect to reach a goal, you won’t drift away because you think class is not worth it if you enjoy the process.

I instruct in TKD/mma and this is a True statement for Most.

But you automatically compare your skills and strength to others when you compete. I did for 6 month judo and felt it wasn't for me, then I did 3 years karate and it was way more my thing but too traditional and then I went to boxing age 20 and it's with me since 10 years and will be with me till I die.

Because of ringworm? Some folks are dirty & roll on mats that don’t get cleaned enough!

That elbow escape analogy is so accurate. I've seen a kid get caught in a triangle and his dad was telling 2 in or 2 out. That doesn't help; obviously they know to keep two in or two out, shit happens and you yelling that doesn't help

I chose not to watch this because I don't want to quit.

I stopped because it wasn't fun anymore.

I have very little free money and I still make it happen, and I have to ride the bus at least 45 to 50 minutes minimum there and 45 to 50 minutes home well also having to wait sometimes 20 to 30 minutes for the bus home. And I still make it happen.