You can try to find a cis or trans lesbian. You have the advantage of knowing what trans is about so it might be easier to connect with another trans woman. Just thinking out loud. My exe is trans and this is what he said to me, that he'll probably end up with another trans. I don't know how frequent this is in the community. If he mentioned it, he must see it often.
I'm glad I've found this video very early in my transition. It's hard not to gravitate towards stereotypical feminine norms in an attempt to pass by any means. I'm hoping to avoid this as I find myself. <3
Thank you for this post. I'm not alone! Pre-transition I was oddly jealous of my best friends periods. Post transition I had too many other worries at first, but after GCS I was purchasing and using tampons. But I never went as far as Roberta Close who used chicken blood to help simulate her periods.
Honey, the question for me was, ' am i attracted to girls or do i want to be a girl? Answer? Both ! Its beautiful ! - youre WAY overthinking it. fuck labels. be you, michele mtf ❤️💋
Realizing I am bi kinda saved my sanity lol, but these days I live more of an ace lifestyle because people are hella weird and controlling in every gender group.
As a society we need to make it acceptable for boys and girls to wear/act however they want- and still be boys/girls. Look at the backlash women had only a few generations ago when they wanted to wear pants
As a cis lesbian, I completely respect your openness and vulnerability here, and I understand that you can be trans and still be attracted to women, but I personally would not be attracted to a transgender woman and hope that there are solutions to this that doesn't harm the lesbian community or the trans community. I think being open does help both sides. There seems to be this notion that lesbians need to be open to trans girls to not be transphobic, but I don't think that that's true. Homosexuals can live peacefully alongside female-attracted trans girls if we communicate properly when intersecting in spaces. I think that a female-attracted trans girl should be able to enter sapphic spaces as long as they understand that in most cases, lesbians will not be attracted to them, and bisexuals are more likely to be open to dating them. Trans women attracted to women should also try to clarify their transhood when in a sapphic space so that there isn't so much confusion. I also totally support T4T!! I think that is awesome. For the record, what I'm doing here is attempting to suggest compromises throughout our communities, because the reality is that the traditional label for and conceptualization of lesbianism involves biological sex more than gender presentation, and regardless of how hard lesbians have tried to have an interest in the male sex throughout history, it just is not possible. Of course by saying this I'll be called all sorts of names, "transphobic", "TERF", yadda yadda yadda... It seems these words are being overused and losing their true meaning. Staying grounded in reality and working through REAL complications to see eye to eye is not transphobia people!! Anyways, I digress. Trans girls attracted to women do exist, yes, but we still need to establish boundaries.
Haha yeah, be attracted to who you want! Back when I considered myself a trans lesbian I got upset about it at first but realized over time women like you do us a favor by being honest. Now I took the exit ramp and walked away from our creepy sex defined culture drowned in booze and regrets on all sides, and I feel like a million bucks! Funny thing about coming out and being yourself eventually over time you run out cares to be like everyone else, and I learned to enjoy my own company. I am bi now but choose to live an ace lifestyle where I allow intimate friendship in if the person is actually worth it, no matter how they see me. Gender liberation is a fantastic ride and being a relationship anarchist is what life is all about for me.
I do really appreciate you being honest. I sometimes wonder about the world and it's obsession with gender segregation, like the whole you can't be in x space thing. At this point I just avoid those kind of spaces, I imagine in a hundred years gender segregation will be like racial segregation, but for now I get a front row seat to watch the culture war play out.
My only question is why let them in if it is just a token gesture for you. You may as well just be out and and proud with your exclusion if you all ready are willing to say all that other stuff. I find that odd.
@@OpalDruscilla When you're calling careful analyzing of homophobia and predation "exclusion" you know the world has gone askew. I am not saying this to segregate very rare instances and generalize people, I am saying this based on the wide-spread change occurring within society. Social contagion for one thing, has manipulated once free-thinkers into black-and-white, victimization mentality. The second anyone has an opinion that diverts even slightly from the mainstream view, people like you jump immediately to boxing others into particular labels and insults. I used to be incredibly left-leaning, and very much in the same position as you, until I got prayed upon multiple times by "trans" identifying individuals. If you were allying with the trans community or IN the trans community, you would at least HOPE you'd want to find ways to get rid of and wean out those fakers who misrepresent and pull apart your community, wouldn't you? But no, it is a consistent, immediate jump to defence for those predatory people because you cannot handle the fact that there ARE bad people out there who use the identity to cause harm. I wouldn't be saying all of this is so much hadn't happened to me. Until you've been sexually wronged by a "trans" individual, sexually harassed by another, and lost your detransitioner family friend to suicide, I don't want to hear it honestly. I probably won't even bother continuing this conversation to be honest, due to the immediate name-calling and box-segregation as a result of my politely shared opinions and propositions, I reckon the group-think is strong and that it isn't worth it to have a conversation here. There are more respectful, mature ways to debate someone, but it seems many have forgotten that. I spoke to a complete, religious homophobe the other day, and we actually had a really nice conversation. We politely shared opinions, asked questions, and ended the conversation having both learned from one another. That is how a conversation should go. But I see no use in that hear. All I can say is I hope you have a wonderful day and life, and that nobody approaches your ideas with such an immediate hatred as you have mine. Best wishes to you.
@@OpalDruscilla After having explicitly stated my boundaries to many trans "lesbians", they have continued to breach them. Even close "friends" of mine have touched me in ways I expressed I did not like. When I said I was not attracted to amab individuals, they hadn't taken this as a hint, instead reminding me of their "lesbianism." If you think there should be nothing done to wean out these people from your community, I start to wonder about how you fit into all of this. More willing to risk predators thriving than admit there are issues in your community and solutions needed. More willing to protect those possible fake "trans" predators than possible "transphobes" (as you'd probably label me). It's a joke really. Is the comfort of a small minority more important than the SAFETY of a group of people? Do you prioritize comfort, or safety more? Because I as a lesbian am personally fine with being uncomfortable from time to time if it means more people can escape sexual assault, harassment, etc. I cross the street when behind another woman (though I am cis, I'm very tall and masc presenting), and if someone was feeling unsafe by any instances of LITERAL ALTERATIONS of language that have been proven to have backed up instances of unsafe behaviour, I would take time to listen to these people.
Do you understand that female lesbians want to date people without male genitalia no matter how they identify? I never thought that lesbians needed prostate gland checks? You must understand that women question your logic.
I dont know why but ive always been super creepd out by transbians, probably because the few times ive tried to make freinds with them irl they tried to grab me in a naughty way 😡
I hope your experience will never be mine. But every time I ever told anybody I was transgender especially at work it resulted in me losing my job. I even had a counselor tell me that I needed to stop telling people so that I could keep a job. So like I said I hope the world changes to where you don't have to experience what I experienced but now in my retirement years and I'm struggling. Oh and I don't have any friends.
I know it's really, really hard to live in a world that doesn't always accept or understand us, but I also know it's going to get easier. The amount of people who understand and empathize with what I've shared in this video gives me hope. We're all just people, trying to live our lives happily. There is absolutely nothing to feel ashamed of or embarrassed about, but I know society tries to tell us otherwise. You are loved, and it WILL get better 💛
These are female presenting heterosexual men. Trust me they can find straight women that like them. But Lesbians like biological women with biological female parts. So they're barking up.the wrong tree.
First of all: I think your voice still sounds great (definitely better than mine) despite the cold and I wish I could pass as well as you do…. Secondly: thank you very much for the video. It was soooo relatable for me in so many ways and it definitely made my week quite a bit better
I am so so glad this video was helpful for you. These are all feelings I had growing up that I never knew how to express. Turns out a whole bunch of us shared them. I appreciate your kind words. I understand the desire to pass. I didn't for a long time. It feels impossible in the beginning, but the more comfortable you begin to feel internally, the more comfortable you begin to feel externally. It's a nonlinear journey. 💛 I'm wishing you all the very, very best, and thank you :)
What you need to say to your sis is what if normal was considered by society as not normal, crazy I know, just ask her how would she feel in that context. Would she feel comfortable feeling normal when all of society wasn’t normal. Here’s the crux of this issue, all humans are not normal as normality is merely an idea or perception pertaining to certain conditions in place. But the list not the name really exists, only in societal perception. So if it’s your life, then it’s you reality, You know who you are so love and embrace and own yourself, and have great faith in yourself as you know yourself and your direction in life. If your sister or family cannot come to terms with who you are, then to be honest is their problem not yours ok. This is about your life, not theres
Just seeing this today, I’m learning more and this speaks a lot to me. Regardless of how far this message goes, it reached me. I’m new in this journey and my mind is already a mess. Thank you for speaking something, anything, that gives a few of us a voice and helps us put our own unique thoughts together. Stay strong and live long
OMG thanks for your video, you put some words on my feelings as well, except just form me my greatest regret is to been born in 1982 at a time when these subject was anyway kind "out of the line" because yes i always felt bad in my body and yes i love women and as you my first feeling was ok you love girls so your're a boy and at my puberty we were in above 1993 so no internet, not trans comunity, very closed gay circles nowhere to get exchange and information and then i forced me to boy life, musculation, martial art, i even ender to work as pruner and trucs mechanics i had girlfiends i been maried to a woman, i had a daughter, i divorced and now at 41 due to back probles i should stop working manualy i no more need to rely on a strong man body to live and guess what yeah my lack of acceptaion in my gender identity hit me again pricipally because i am now single for a wile and the clock turns. But hey i build a man life durin 30 years and genderly i fell like i always felt like doing the splits for too long, add to this that i am HP multipotential.... fuck my though and feelings are a fucking soup. But hey i decided to meet a therapist about this subject. Whait and see. But Thanks again Girl! Thank you so much just for this video.
i cant make friends with trans people, for one a transwoman is a male and a transman is a female. 2 i vote republican and it seems that to other trans people they are fanatics with politics. im transgender with surgery and 11 years of being that
Same. Big f-ing same. I don't pass, and probably will never pass, I will never be skinny and cis passing like so many younger trans girls. It sucks to feel one way about myself but not have any of it reflected back to me from other trans people and cis lesbians.
Boone?! Holy crap! I watched your younger years. I so wanted your hair lol. I'm a transgender lesbian also. You're not alone. I'm here. Unfortunately letting you know is about all I can do. But your old videos did help and they pushed me on. I still want that hair! I'm glad to see you're still hanging in there. Keep your head up girly.
