pray skyy pray God is a match-maker too and he knows people's heart. Sometimes we think we need a relationship when we are in a season where we should be focusing on healing, building healthy boundaries and growth for example. The best way to figure it out is to ask Christ through his word. So many folks are broken , deceptive or don't even know themselves,they will never be real about who they truly are so we need spiritual discernment to see beyond the appearance. There is a scripture that I find efficient to pray with when asking for revelation: Deuteronomy 29:29 "The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us" just asking God to reveal the season you are in and while dating to reveal the intension of the person and he will speak, I personally experienced it and one of my friend too
Great advice!! And this why you shouldn’t tell a guy “what you’re looking for” whatever you tell them they are gonna act up on it to get you close and attached to them
Love ya Lisette - Dating is such a roller coaster and its even crazier during this pandemic. Red flagsssssss from our lovely host: 1. Future Faking and Empty Promises 2. Love bombing too early 3. Says he "Loves"/ wants to "marry" you 4. Luhsetty's equation: action - words = ANSWER
This is why you shouldn't have high expectations or put your expectations or happiness on someone else. Maintain your own lifestyle, continue to travel with friends or by yourself. Keep them as an option and keep dating other people. You gotta play the game like they do.
This made me emotional! A lot of great advice Lisette, thank you for being honest and for expressing that you are no longer tolerating dumb 💩! I think a lot of girls and women needed to hear what you had to say! I am in a 5 year, very committed relationship, but I appreciate and can respect all your words! I know one day you’ll find a guy who is going to treat you like you deserve! 💖
Definitely needed this as a 21 year old. These men nowadays older and my age are getting ridiculous. However we r aware not all men are like that….until then I will be setting my boundaries and waiting/looking for my Russell Wilson.
You go girl!! If all women did this, men would have to straighten up. But the reality is, there will always be some women that don’t have any morals or boundaries 🙄
It's so sad and seriously unfortunate what dating has become. Idk if anyone else notices but it's literally like a war in dating. Men are against women so much that we have to protect ourselves at all cost. Most...and I mean MOST MEN are out to play a woman these days. Honestly I'd rather be happy and fulfilled alone if it means not having to run into any other jerks 💔♥️
the world is broken Kayciaz..if we look at the dating pool today and compare it decades ago people had more values into place (christian oriented, not addicted to porn: this one is a huge red flag too, gentleman on date and getting to know people for the purpose of getting married, emotionally mature) our generation isn't like that anymore many folks don't know how to date or ask relevant question for a healthy long-term relationship, women also don't know their self-worth and act up wild without thinking about the consequences on their reputation in the long-run (i'm a girl talking) and not too many people like to work on themselves: praying and letting the holy spirit help them with emotional trauma as well as therapist, learning communication skills, surrounding themselves with mature adult in healthy relationship hence the mediocrity of the dating pool
I dealt with a fuck boy last year. He was playing mind games with me. Treating me like we were in a relationship, but didn’t want the title and everything that comes with a relationship. The man was 30 too🥴 He has been forever blocked💯
I went through the same thing and he used me us like a freakin object…wait…He was 30 and still doing this bs?! Is there any hope for us?! Like do these guys ever grow up????? At the age of 30 they should know better! 🤦🏽♀️😒
12:31 Lisette seems to be a mermaid itself. She is getting prettier every day. Im obssesed with her astonishing beauty. Love her makeup and nails. Hair looks on point
"THE TRASH WILL TAKE ITSELF OUT!" Almost got up and ran around my house. SO spot on. These dudes really think they the 💩 and the smell when they really just ain't 💩.
This just opened my eyes 😭 just turned 20 in college and no one prepared for the kind of men I would be encountering. This felt like a big sis talk and it helped a lot!!!
I've got rejected by a person who gave me illusions and it made me be obsessed with this person so it was basically a person who gave me plenty of attention and then stopped talking to me and rejected me. so this video just made me happy and made remember that there are more people in the world because this was my "first relationship" so thanks this helped me to move one :)
@@rosemarybiswas7708 I know! it's hard to move on and in my case It was my first "relationship" so i'm still moving on and i'm not good at It so I Hope you are doing it better than me ( i'm only 13 btw so I really don't know a los about this stuff) Ñ
Girl, future faking is a narcissistic trait. Just like love bombing is. These dudes out here sound sick as hell. I know I need to date, but I know it could be a shit show🤣🤣🤣
Im literally living this exact experience rn, like he stopped giving me attention the moment I opened up about my feelings. Everyone is saying that he’s playing and keeping me on line but still I feel so addicted and can’t stop myself from talking to him 😩 I decided to ignore him today but couldn’t decline when he called me after a long time. I feel like a little girl and a toy. I’m losing my own respect
I understand you! I’m so glad you atleast realise this. Trust me you’re not losing yourself. It is difficult. You’ve crossed the first step, you will soon throw him out pf your life too
Girl I was in the same situation you were for 2 years, so listen close, If you want to have a conversation about feelings, and the guy just dont give a fuck and ignores you or act like your feelings are not that important, or acts playfull, please! Get rid of him!! I was on a Long distance situationship with a guy for over 2 YEARS, he told me everything I wanted to hear that showed that he also wanted a relationship, and when I came to see him finally, and told him my intentions of having a conversation about dating, he got distant for 3 days and just said he would not come to see me anymore! Dry like this! And I came to another country to meet him, I am in his almost same neighbourhood, and he didn't even care, he just said he doesn't want a relationship! After 2 years of saying the exact contrary to me. So please, when a guy shows you who he is, just ACCEPT THAT. If he does the silent treatment everytime you want to have a serious conversation, and when you complain about things that are bothering you, if he always tries to turn things around to make it seem like is your fault in everything, if he never accepts his mistakes... all red flags that I closed my eyes to, because I was believing in his words. So please, HE IS NOT WORTH YOUR MENTAL HEALTH! .
An actual beauty queen 👑😍 Getting attached is probably one of the hardest things when you really like someone but one thing I’m trying to work on this year is becoming more emotionally mature because we don’t have time to be crying over guys who aren’t even ours 😩🤧
The dating world is confusing these days, the irony of it is when you do not care about about the guys that's when they chase you🤦♀️. Just don't invest too much in the relationships until about 6-8 months. If it's not serious by then walk away.
if you actually pray before even being official and ask God for discernment and revelation about that person state of mind you will kick him to the curb real quick💯
It’s sad that the dating life is that way nowadays ☹️ Personally, when i was dating a lot, i would set my boundaries right away and wouldn’t give more attention and wouldn’t get involved emotionally more than they do. I am a confident person so that would scare some BOYS (not men) 🙂 ps. I tried my best to write in english even thought i speak french
Yup so many narcs in society these days it is something else. We gotta raise better men but until that happens stay alert people. Set boundaries and see who won't try to cross them. You'll weed out most just with that. Look for consistency empathy kindness respect. Ppl will do or say anything. Sorry you went through this Lisette but glad you actually escaped without longterm complications and learned quickly. These are the only men I've experienced and some of us are stuck dealing with their bs eternally. Stay vigilant confident and at peace ladies. If they aren't adding more than they take walk away. Honesty is key. Much ❤️. Great video Lisette.
GIRLLL THE WHOLE GO WITH THE FLOW THING IS SOOO TRUE😭😭 So many of them don't even know what the want 😩"If you aim at nothing, you hit nothing." It's so frustrating to hear guys say that and I almost always back off when I hear them say tha, I want someone who knows what they want with a little bit of direction. Seems like too much to ask for these days smh and I'm not even talking about having a detailed, step-by-step 2 year engagement plan but like you said, dating with intention.
Girl you made me cry I swear 6:55 you described my current situation TOP TO BOTTOM. The handsome boy, the making things clear about not being a hookup girl, THE PUBLIC THING, THE APOLOGY… and I haven’t heard from him in like 2 weeks, he just stopped replying… it’s like a goddamn pattern😔 the worst thing is that in my case he was my close friend, we had known each other for years and I was always there for him. He played me for almost 3 months, got bored and pretty much realised he didn’t needed me anymore so he left and broke my heart 🙂
@@norapeace6526 yeah it sucks😔 we had been friends for years only this time we kinda re linked our friendship but we soon started talking in a non-friendly kinda way. When I reminded him about not being a “hookup girl” he slowly stopped talking to me 💀
@@xoxogg4440 wow! That’s so sad… we always hear that men are not friends with girls for no reason, unless they grew up together. So he probably always wanted to smash and hoped you would just let him. But more power to you for holding your ground and morals and values and saying to hell with him because you’re worth more than that. And if he didn’t want a relationship with you, it’s his loss. You’ll find better even though I know it hurts right now. You’ll get through this girl. Don’t ever let him come back because you know what he wants. He’s a jerk
The part about giving you false hope by talking about your future together is soooo true! I had a long term boyfriend meet my extended family and say how he was planning on us moving in together and then broke up with me a week later saying that it was planned… oh yeah and it was at my grandmas funeral smh
Girl u look absolutely beautiful❣️❤️ I love your fit & nails 💅🏾 also. I’m so sorry to hear about your breakup again & all these F Boys , boys these days are assholes. I pray u find a man who will treat and love u right xo. Save yourself for the right one love and let god do his work. Love u girl glad to see u back ! 💖💕 Please post more I love your content & I love your vibe gyaal ! 😌
I’ve been saying this forever, but if every woman had morals and values and respect for themselves, men would have to straighten up. But because they don’t, men just go to the next one who doesn’t have values and morals. So even if a few girls are very strict with their boundaries, it doesn’t matter because he will find someone who isn’t. That’s why dating sucks….but I’m going to stay firm on my values and I know I will end up with a great guy
💯 unfortunately women have this "i can fix it" mindset when they see a red flag... I've been there, not only is it draining, you're the one that ends up hurt 😔
@@InshasChoice so true… I had a guy stop talking to me Bc he didn’t like that I brought up God when he thought God made things worse for him… & even though I really cared for him, he did me a big favor by walking away… I am a strong believer in Christ and I couldn’t date someone who wasn’t. But love/like will make u do some crazy things
I experienced this in high school around 16-17 years old. Even though I learned from it I still wish I could go back and warn younger me. But now I have someone in my life who has showed me what I deserve. I think it’s important to expose guys because women need it now more than ever.
Such a good talk! You’re beautiful and when you heal yourself and bring yourself joy and happiness, the right man will just come when you’re not looking
Hi Lisette I know it’s tough getting back out there into the dating world but don’t give up, I definitely can’t speak for all guys but there are still some of us guys that really appreciates a woman like you that is honest and up front about what she wants and her intentions, and would give you the love and respect you deserve not only through their words but most importantly through their actions
Girl you made some POINTS. 👏🏽 and you had me cracking up 😂♥️ Your stories are so relatable. I’ve had some of these experiences and this girl chat made me feel so valid and seen. I appreciate you for sharing this. And your video editing is so good!
This is making me think about dating on tinder and other dating apps just for experience 😭😭😭😭… but nahhhh, because those guys usually are looking for one thing and one thing only & treat you like you’re disposable and they’re going to make me dislike guys more than I already do 😭
11:09 that cut me deep because, I just got out of a friends with benefits and for some odd reason, it hurt but in hindsight this video just helped me get the me that I deserve. Thanks Lisette x.
Yo I literally experienced every single scenario you mentioned and then some. After the last guy I’m like maybe God want me to sit this season of dating out. I can’t 😩
I am from India I had this same kind of things happened to me .... Guys talk to me as if they love me and want me to be invested but then if they find an other girl they just dump you by saying u are getting emotionally attached and I don't want a relationship .... I was like what the fuck u could have just told me at the beginning "we could just causally hang out" instead you spoke sweet words like I wanna marry you .. you could be my perfect girlfriend I just want time to announce our relationship public why do you have to tell those things if u don't wanna be in relationship? ..... Now hearing lisette say this same thing makes me confident love u girl 😍
I absolutely LOVE this version of Lisette, so authentically you and unapologetic, you make me literally laugh out loud and smile so much. I been watching you since I was in like middle school and you had braces still 😭 my OG RU-vidr fr 🤞🏼
This made me feel so comfy omg I thought I was the only person who realised this with guys n I honestly didn’t know what to do cuz I can’t talk about this to anyone since I saw it as embarrassing but now I know it’s normal and I’m so glad that my boundaries were never “weird” in the first place tysm
My teacher told me back in the day that in life don't talk do it because talk does not bring success it keeps you back from actually getting that success 💯
Love love love this!! I’m happily married, but this made me think of so many exes I wasted time with 😂 the way you delivered this was perfect 💯 Thank you for making this video for women who are unaware of these red flags! I’m so glad you know your worth and I pray you find the man that will respect and cherish you forever 🤍
It’s amusing how our journeys are so similar. Your braces videos in the past got me through my braces period, it gave me hope. Fast track to the present, we were both in 3 year relationships that ended around the same time for the same reasons. And now, we’re both having the same experiences with these new evolution of f*ck boys. I’m so thankful for you Luhhsetty💕
You're absolutely right, and this is a video every girl should watch, sometimes I forget about this and get hurt but it's good that someone reminds you to stay focused and alert. You gotta act like you're the prize girl because you are 💅
Wow how do u know my life?! I’m going through the same damn thing right now so this hits home for me. Working on self confidence is so key to knowing what u want and what u don’t. Guys will really tell u anything and not care about ur feelings. It’s great advice that u are giving! Lots of love lusette!!
Babes are you reading my mind or what?! So spot on! I’m currently trying to start dating for a relationship and these men truly know how to just talk. Side story: I’m on a dating app and I tell this guy what I’m looking for and he says he wants the same. Cool. Next day he asks if I was free this weekend to drive to his place (3 hours away) just to watch movies……. Meanwhile I have never met this man before (public places only pls) Just say you wanted to hook up and I would’ve gone my way. So I say nah I’m good and he unmatches me. The trash will always take itself out!! I just don’t get why they can’t be honest about what they want like it’ll be easier for the both of us sir. Thank you so much for always being so open while also giving the best advice!💖💖 So excited to see the new projects you have coming up
I just went through a break up almost a week now. The first two days were rough but I got over him quickly (we were only dating for 3 weeks! Also he's only 19 and I'm 23). Watching your video helped me so much bc now I'm really questioning my ex and I's relationship to see if it was even real and did he actually care at all. I do have attachment issues bc I do fall for someone quickly and ik that's how I'm gonna get hurt. Reasons why I still have trust issues. I'm gonna take a break from boys for awhile and enjoy my own company. Definitely gonna have a hot girl summer💯
@@Hannah-zx2zp thank you!❤ Before I got into my recent relationship, I've been single for almost 7 years. Throughout those years, it has been difficult but I pulled through. I learned over the years and now it's best to be single and live my life. My time will come but rn I'm all bout taking care and loving myself💖
As a 20 year old I needed this advice because growing I never got any advice on sex and dating. So watching these vlogs and you talking about your past has helped me a lot, Cause I don’t wanna give myself to a guy who would not value me.
Yess I agree....date with intention....no going with the flow because it wastes your time. Guys say one thing but do another and when you confront them abt it they get aggressive and say its your fault. And yeahh....it gets lonely but its better than getting hurt. Keep being aware and stick to what you believe in! ❤
Girl, I felt all of this. Hopefully we'll both experience a more positive side of the dating world. Also, there are so many guys like this with the EXACT same red flags. Also, whats up with the "I love you" after 2 weeks? You don't know me. What is it that you love? 🤨 So good to hear someone else repeat the lessons learned from bad experiences. I need to implement the lessons and make better descisions next time
Lisette, this is the video I didn’t know I needed 😂 I’ve been in the dating scene for 3 years and the men just keep getting worse lol Thank you for sharing your experience 💖 appreciate your honesty :)
True advice! I'd just say 1 thing, (12:23) dating multpile guys at one time can be draining cause you're giving your time energy and attention to all these people and one might get really attached to you. So just know what you're in for if you do that.
Ohmygosh, I'm literally sitting here screamingggg!! So it's not just me that was confused and completely caught off guard😭😭Thank you so much for this girll x
Yes agree completely with the attention thing! 🙌🏽 you crave it and go crazy waiting for it. Empty promises is another thing that’s happened to me. Waiting around for things that don’t happen. It’s so bad that we all can relate to what you’re saying 🥺
Girl your hair looks so beautiful, healthy, and full 💕I’ve been watching you for years. You’ve gained so much wisdom 🧠 As women it’s important that we know our worth 👑 I’ve been saying the exact same thing about attachment! I no longer get attached to people, I just experience them. We aren’t in control in this cycle. In the beginning it’s very hard due to expectations, but from experience you learn and grow.
girl, you are so smart!!! I just had a breakup and I can resonate with some of these things, I'm not looking to start dating now but will also have a lot more boundaries when I do. 🌸💛🌈
It’s very sad that young women in their 20’s are experiencing these men playing games and trying to manipulate them. I’m 49yrs old and when I was in my 20’s and 30’s I was proposed to 3 times- I couldn’t stay single. Young men during the 90’s and early 2000’s wanted get married and have a family. I want you young ladies to know that the dating scene has changed drastically. It’s not just the young men anymore- men in their 40’s and 50’s are out here playing the field now, so please don’t think that dating an older man will offer more stability. I’m living proof of it. I wish you the best sweetie. Continue to maintain your standards and boundaries. Loved this video…
Lisette....siiiissss........YOU ARE SPEAKING EVERYTHING ABOUT MY PAST LIFE!!!!!! Because everything you have said in this video, really speaks about the things I went through in my past life. The red flags I should've known and got out from long time ago. Back in August, I had to cut my ex best friend off because he was a narcissist egotistical verbal abusive guy and cutting him off after dealing with him for 8 years was the best thing that ever happened to me. Now, I'm in a healthy relationship with someone I reconnected with from high school and my glow is just better and better everyday. So watching this video, I wish you uploaded this video years ago because I would've have the strength to leave every one of these dudes before, but getting closer to god was pretty much what I needed to have the strength to leave. Lisette, I love you girl and I love your videos.
Yeeeessss to everything you said 🙌🏾 The dating game is really quite tiresome nowadays. This inspires me to talk on my next podcast about focusing on self, becoming a better person, and making sure that you make yourself happy because at the end of the day, that’s all that matters! I’ll love to see more girl talks! Thank you L, this was needed💗
11:24 "When you like somebody, that's when you know you're f*cked" LOL Girl, I died because...SAME! I'll be 40 this year. I wish I could say it gets better, but it seems as though the "men" here in Texas are on the same Fboy frequency as the others scattered across the nation. I've absolutely learned that paying attention to the red flags and "non-negotiables" are KEY. No more time to be wasting time!
You are wise beyond your years. I am 30 and still out here being disappointed. I agree 100% with you, take the situation for what it is, not an illusion for what it could be. It’s those happy chemicals in your head that make us imagine the potential of it all. I wish you good luck out there. Just manifest your Diamond in the rough and you’ll find him. I think the key is to love yourself and heal first.✨
OMG YES AND FOR ME IT WAS LIKE CRAZY! It ended SO BAD, I was in my late 20s and I too was up front and forward and they weren’t. And yup sis same game hot and cold bs. Like wtf. It totally is true to meet actions minus words. That’s how I found my partner of 9 years (on ok Cupid) ❤️
Omg, I just encountered a lot of them and I wanted to date one. I‘ve never felt so blatantly disrespected in just one day. He is hella attractive, goofy and has this charm to him but he was playing these dysfunctional stupid games you described and so I decided to friend zone him through text. 😏 Felt relieving but at the same time, I already got a little attached and so I felt a little upset about it. Fact is I know I deserve so much better and therefore it had to be done.
Thank you so much lisette…… thanks for all the advice and because of you I am aware of red flag and I also love the “actions-words=actions” and again thank you😊
Hi my granddaughter subscribe to your channel but when your video popped up on my feed I listen to it . your message was definitely meant for me in this changing world of dating. I'm 65 yrs old you were on point and gave great advice thumbs up for you👍🥰👠💄👑🙏
Amazing video. I dated a f*boy and I learned the same thing. He dumped me but when it comes to selfish guys like that I actually thanked him for ending the relationship.
omg this was so helpful! in the same situation of entering the dating game again after 3 years and now being in college. knowing boundaries and confident w/in yourself. thank you for being so up front ab your experiences :)
“you 30+ and you calling me up to watch the lion king” LMAOOOOO lisette is literally hilarious! 😭 i would want to be friends with you! i love that you know your boundaries and self worth! thanks for always being a bigger sis setty! 🤍
You are so smart. 💕 I met a guy who told me he wanted to just “scratch an itch”. He said he was too busy for anything else. I told him that I wasn’t a casual sex girl. However, I was attracted him. In fact, I felt a little ashamed of being attracted to someone who would say that to me. So, I told myself, if he got to know me he might think differently. Well, one day soon after we met, I was really having a bad day and I needed someone to talk too. I guess I thought I could steer the relationship towards the direction of friends first. I called him and his patience were really short with me. That hurt my feelings and that was all it took for me to not call again and throw his number away. You’re absolutely right dating is hard. You have to definitely stick to the boundaries you set for yourself. You’ll meet someone right for you eventually.
