👌More videos can be found on this topic at ru-vid.com/group/PLcB3trehXswjMY_p7NThD4UjBHXpHcUH6&si=g_d8ofG2YCVddpDT ❤️Self help activities and worksheets and concierge coaching with Dr. Snipes can be accessed at DocSnipes.com 👍Online Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certification
This is worth THOUSANDS of dollars of therapy. (I’m in individual therapy as well but this is so concise and helpful). Thank you so much for sharing this.
I've just started the video. I've noticed I ruminate on areas of my life where I didn't stand up for myself, in abusive relationships. Where I've been gullible and my lack of boundaries ( which no one taught). My own education in this area has brought on persistent ruminating on past injustices.
@@southerncross3638 my boss always tries to put me down because i stand up for myself instead of letting shit go. I spent my whole life being shit on and letting shit go....had enough
15 Strategies- 1) Define your RML (Rich Meaningful Life) 2) Mindfully and nonjudgmentally notice and accept 3) Write it Down 4) Unhook 5) Evaluate the purpose of this self talk (safety and/or control, physical needs) 6) Create safety (trauma triggers) 7) Get the facts (not feelings or assumptions) Am I safe? Am I using cognitive distortions (mind reading, personalisation, magnification, catastrophizing) Is this a good use of my time and energy 8) Make time to ponder 9) Practice Forgiveness Self’s own mistakes and flaws Other’s mistakes and flaws 10) Practice Loving Kindness May your life be filled with peace, health and love 11) Guided Imagery Alternate script Urge surfing Support and safety Successful accomplishment (speech, asking someone on a date, exercise, waking up ‘happy’) 12) Thought Stopping 13) Mindfulness and grounding 14) Distract with activities 15) Get support
I think this is the video that's going to change my life. Been suffering from what I thought were intrusive thoughts for years but turns out it had been uncontrolled rumination all along. Thank you!!
Sometimes the sheer pull of the negative thought loops are so strong (due to the severity of the injustice), you try to stay conscious but all of a sudden you're replaying inner arguments for 30 seconds again before you snap out of it. Very frustrating to feel powerless.
Sometimes i have felt better if i did the right thing or stopped the abusor... Then when i ruminate... Oh, i did the right thing... But then why i ruminate about it? It s a compulsion, also has to do with the nervous system, plagued of abuse
People had to work in negativity onto u, you have to work to drown that out with positivity. As soon as ur mindful of a bad memory playing in your head -immediately think of a good one! Use your five senses to really feel immersive and overpower the bad one :)
@@xnyroxchannel Thank you. I'm actually getting better at NOT engaging with the angry thoughts. I've come a long way in a few months. I now have longer periods of no thought. It's a minor miracle.
Dr. Snipes, colleague here and it just doesn’t feel right stopping by without telling you how wonderful you and your channel are. Stellar information, endearing personality, sense-of-humor and wit…I mean it just isn’t possible to exceed top-caliber! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This has been a lifeline for me. I am a decade and some suffered of C-PTSD and Chronic Depression and WOW did I need this information right now. I am feeling controlled by my thoughts and Im suffering! Writing flashcards to keep on deck so I can remind myself of your 15 Strats! Thank you so much 🎉
I love Doc snipes. You are so thorough, experienced, and a sweet spirit. God bless you. Your work is taking my two years of therapy to another level. I feel like every video is of course educational. For me, it’s like an extension/ extended therapy session with soooooooooo much healing, wisdom , knowledge, and value. THANK YOU. Thank you🙏🏾♥️
That is so nice of you to say. I appreciate it! Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness. Bless you as well. I also have another RU-vid Channel: Good Orderly Direction | Practical Bible Study ru-vid.com/show-UCYYJCD94NU3_qdbkSEyHLrg Please consider liking and subscribing.
@@DocSnipes hey I absolutely NEED the videos you are putting out. I have more work to find myself again than ever at this time in my life. I am so grateful for these. I've shared MANY times. The one with this speaker on the impacts of trauma on the brain was soo good ice watched it 5 times already. You are helping the 🌎 and this is one small Thank you 🙏🏼💙
I have a very difficult time with rumination issues. I've tried many different medications. Some days I pray that these repetitive anger thoughts go away. Thank God for videos like this! It keeps me closer to understanding the problem. I've found journaling can help clear up my mind. I hit my head on the pavement several times about 10 years ago and I strongly feel that this has made my mental illness much worse and harder to treat.
Thank you for creating this video. Today, I just spoke with a therapist about my ruminating thoughts. She gave me a couple of suggestions, but not as in depth as yours. I am going to try them because thinking about the same thing daily over and over again is wearing me out.
I do the same thing. My husband is having an emotional affair....could be more. I constantly check the find my phone app, etc. looking to see where he is...he is the ultimate NPD.
I’ve tried several different psychologists and never continue because I feel they can’t relate and don’t understand this, but you explain it perfectly. You should consider building a community, maybe group therapy to help with these issues. Thank you for this lecture!
So nice of you to say. I have been looking into building a psycho educational community. 😀 If it comes to fruition, you will see news about it on the channel!
This was absolutely terrific! Thank you! One thing I do to stop ruminations when I'm trying to fall asleep, or even if I wake up in the middle of the night, is to play an audiobook on a timer. That way my mind is engaged and I can't think of the ruminations! It really works! Thanks again!
Wow, really amazing talk... I cried to what you where saying, it was a relief because I didn't know what was happing to me & these overwhelming thoughts that keep repeating. Your right about trying to tune out of those negative memories or thoughts, it is most relaxing. Thank you soooo much for helping me! 🙏🏻👍💯😎
Omg thank you so much I could not deal with the rumination anymore. It has took alot of my time and energy and I have not been able to get my mind off of the cycle its like a circle going around and around. I feel free after watching the whole video. It is my first time going to a therapist this month I couldn’t wait longer. Cannot thank you enough for this video.😭❤️ No more waking up to ruminations, neither spending my day rumination. It was getting to the point where all my energy was being spent ruminating and thinking about the worse case scenerio and avoiding situations.
I just wanted to thank you ma’am n say may god bless you! I’ve been tryna get out my head for 6years n with just listening to you for 10minutes my life changed thank you!
For me, it's all about energy management and sorting, along with loving-kindness/compassion. Mindfulness is also very good, breath meditation helps calm down andslow thinking.
Thank you so much. You have already helped me this morning. I wrote my thoughts down and can’t believe that worked so fast! I will keep on listening and learning from you. Thank you. Judy
Great video! So happy to see your channel approaching 200K subscribers. I found your channel two years ago at the start of the COVID 19 quarantine. You had less than 30K subs at that time. Your practical, informative style is great. So glad you are reaching a larger audience.
This is amazing , I've struggled with this for years . I asked about this on your last live Q&A , Thank You Doctor ! I will use this as a tool to change the way I Think, This is going to change my life for the better
I just found your channel and I find you are amazing: knowledgeable, methodical, comprehensive, kind , caring and loving. I am learning a lot from you. Keep are the good work .
I find my self ruminating about an incident with an ex coworker. I called her after she left the company- didn’t realize she was at work! She has not spoken to me since. I don’t ruminate about her specifically but about the untimely phone call. Can’t get it out of my head but will say this video is a start to help stop the ruminating! This and meditation! Thank you Doctor!
I find giving yourself compassion and allowing yourself to be imperfect are key to beating that inner critic. Ruminations and obsessive thinking is an amygdala hijacking where the inner voice takes over.
Yes, self compassion and adopting imperfection are highly important in beating the inner critic. I actually have videos on that. Here they are: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-ZMJIkExQeJc.html ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-t32r-CJMXcw.html Also, here are some videos on taming the inner critic: ru-vid.comsearch?query=critic
Im so happy I found this channel. Thank you for these videos, doc. I supper from GAD and i ruminate and I worry. Been to therapy, both psycho dynamic and cbt for many years and been helped by that. These videos are a great resource on tecniques and strategies that can help and keep what I learned in therapy alive and active. Thanks!
I was catastrophizing this week. My bunny was sick and I worried for her mortality. I finally got her to the vet and they seemed like it was easily treated.
I just want to say "thank you, Dr. Snipes". This video was awesome and it was such a help. The part about "Did I lock the Door?" had the hairs on my neck standing up! My God, I'm not the only one. I found the way to conquer this was to take a deep breath and think to myself, "Chief you have had these thoughts 300 times and every time it turned out the Door was locked, why would this time be any different?", lol. I know it sounds silly but it worked. I am so blessed to have gotten treatment and therapy and I know this has had a positive impact on my Life. Great video and thanks for posting!
This is so helpful I do ruminating 24/7 unless engaged fully , it’s very destructive & when I’m driving I miss extra etc you have very useful new tips in this ! Thanks
My therapist recommended your channel. You definitely have a generous amount of supportive information. I was wondering though, if you could do an accompanying video on "maladaptive daydreaming" and imagined conversations with people you know.
I was diagnosed many years ago with major recurrent depression, for which I was hospitalized in the 1990s. Over the years, with help from therapy and at times, medication, I've learned how to get it under control so that I can function pretty well, but since around November of 2022, I noticed that depression was becoming more prevalent for me. This video has helped me identify the fact that I have been ruminating over several recent--some major--life changes that have caused stress for me. This realization has already reduced my angst, and I am highly motivated to put into practice the strategies Dr. Snipes has suggested. Thank you so much for this video!
Thank you Dr. Snipes. Very helpful. Very wise. Your films must be saving people's lives. You give hope to so many people. You make people turn away from the abyss.
Dear Doc Snipes! Thank you for your videos! Your suggestions and thoughts are very helpful und useful. Suffering from depression and ruminating both caused by trauma , and your knowledge is helpful to find the right direction for the day.
Wow you are extremely intelligent and knowledgeable, had to hit that subscribe button! I love how you are so in depth, detailed and thorough in your discussions. Am really looking forward to all your other content!!! 😊
May God bless you Dr. Snipes. This is the best video on ruminating on the entire net! I have a trauma bond from being in a mentally abusive relationship with a covert narcissist for almost a year. The discard was nine months ago, and I still constantly think about her throughout the day. It's a very difficult cycle to break. Even though I have forced myself to accept that I could never change a disordered person, there's still a part of me that wants to know why? It's almost as if the Cluster B disordered person implants a tiny tape recorder in your brain to record all the amazing parts of the idealization/love bombing/honeymoon phase, then when they switch over to abuse they simply press play, and let the "good times" thoughts loop, which distract from all the horrible things they do to you after. :(
I am sorry that happened to you and I appreciate you watching the video. What did you find most useful from it? Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ru-vid.comsearch?query=traumabond
Thank you so much for your kind words! I’m really glad you found the video helpful. Ruminating can feel like such a difficult cycle to break, but with the right tools and mindset, it’s definitely something we can manage over time. For everyone else watching, what was the most helpful tip for you when it comes to stopping rumination? Do you have any personal strategies that work for getting out of your head? Sharing your experiences could really help others in the same situation!
Very helpful. Now I know why as soon as I wake the problem that’s bugging me comes to mind, same as before sleep too. Now instead of carrying on and ruminating all day🥴 I’ll understand and try hard to focus elsewhere.
Thank you for this very educating video! Not thinking about a ruminating topic is the solution for me, but it took me a while to understand how it works. It feels soo hard and soo anti intuitive that not trying to think/solve a problem/thought is actually a way to solve it. It can really be scary how rumination can distort your thinking patterns into constant negativity.
I'd have to remind myself the narcissist just wants supply and ruminating is in a way giving it to them on a telepathic level because they will just say things to try and get in my head and cause anger, sleep deprivation and other health issues. I know if I can not give them any of those problems in my life it cuts them off. I've shown up to work the next day after a toxic person said something to upset me and when they saw me looking well rested and happy I could see the anger on their face because they knew their attempt to get me ruminating on what they did failed. Also, after watching your video I'd say alternative script is really important because if you have time to be ruminating at work over something negative you might as well create a positive list of things to ruminate about. This counter rumination will east a lot of tension and bring back focus on what's important.
wow that was an eye-opening thought for me...the narcissist trying to get in your head cause you pain...I was raised by a narcissist mother, I have relationship with her sister & cousin, and they are not straight-up cold & calculating like mom was, they still have a need to do exactly what you wrote, & now since I studied the sub-mind & narcissistic behavior, I am aware the program exists in the family - they are just more covert..they know how to be subtle.
@@juliea.244 The way to test them is go out to dinner with them, wait until they say something mean and then don't give them any emotional response positive or negative. That shows them they have no control over you. If they're truly narcissistic you'll see them do things in response that verifies what you knew about them. In my case my father started claiming he forgot to meet up for dinner as a way of attempting to hurt me. It worked the opposite because it helped me go no contact with him. It showed me who I was dealing with and I don't want people that behave that way in my life.
@@rwdchannel2901 thanks for the tip on how to test folks..they already failed & I know I have to cut the cord...also what you mention about your dad, my cousin once no-show on me to an important event, and every time I ever met her she was 30-60 minutes late...I just never knew this stuff until now, that's what they're trying to do, get in my head & hurt me, wow.
Thank you so much for this information, Doc Snipes! I am looking forward to implementing these tools; I often have ruminating thoughts and I believe they are keeping me stuck in patterns that I don't want to be attracting.
@@DocSnipes I have used a few so far! Just telling myself ‘stop’; replacing the thoughts with completely different thoughts/visualisation; bringing myself into conscious presence by acknowledging what is in my immediate environment; reasoning: “what is the worst that can happen? Is it likely?”, “what DO I have control over here?”. And today I also wrote it down, balled up the paper and just binned it 😊
Thank you, thank you, thank you! Thank you for saying that not all rumination is bad. So many sources now make it seem that any kind of ruminating is a negative sign, but I first learned the term with respect to philosophers pondering meaning or scientists conducting "thought experiments". I do have to say, as a person with ADHD, it's possible to be using a positive form of rumination (meditating on something good or helpful), and not be able to stop due to being in a state of hyperfocus. I've experienced this, and I've heard from others who have, too.
I have developed a driving fear after having panic attacks in the vehicle 6 years ago. I did better with this and was driving decent again just not as far then I caught covid last April in 2021. My panic attacks came flooding back! It’s debilitated me and I constantly think about it all day long. How it’s ruined my independence and how it’s holding me back from being free. I’m trying exposure therapy to get back to where I was but I ruminate all day long. It’s completely obsessive. I need to get over the driving fear and it’s all I think about. I also have generalized anxiety disorder. I do hypnosis and go to therapy once a week.
People can have panic attacks in vehicles, or after a motor vehicle accident, or negative event, partly because a vehicle is a confining space and/or they are strapped in with the seatbelt. The escape response (trapped feeling) can get triggered. HTH.
Getting COVID would also affect your breathing, struggling to breathe is part of an anxiety or panic response. So it sounds like there may be partly a physiological basis.
AAAaargh. I'm not sure how many times I had to replay the last few minutes while listening to this because listening to the topic of rumination prompted ruminations that drowned out what I was trying to listen to.
thanks a bunch for your show today and qualified expertise in these areas. pretty confident in hoping i'll be able to make progress on the things i mentioned toward the end of the show, wanted to add before the end that one of the things affecting myself and my progress was my abilities in modulating my exposure to media and technology that affects me in negative ways. sometimes the bad news, certain youtube/spotify/other streaming channels that are changing in polarizing ways from day to day, negative cross-talk through public discussions, social media etc, seems to have a way of keeping one back a step from the 2 steps forward of progress one begins to make. i think im going to try to work on (physical) notebooking/check listing/outlining and some time management techniques to help bring some time slotted diversity to my days. overall so far i've found this resource to be at the very least informative and a valuable and unique perspective for someone that's interested in being able to help oneself in modern times and navigate through these emerging new realities that we share. keeping attention to mental health without the negative stigma often associated with it seems like a good tool to add to ones tool box. thanks again, wishing you and your viewers and clients all the best. looking forward to your future content
Thank you very much for your videos. They are really helpful to me. I love your personality too so that makes the videos that bit better! Thanks again!
@@DocSnipes For me personally, at the very beginning recognizing what is going on and WHY- and thank you so much for listing all these great underlying possible reasons - and then "writing it all down" on a peace of paper, crumbling the paper and putting it aside was the absolute best! I am back to being my productive self again. I will be now regularly following up for more content and courses, so much amazing content, thank you!!!
Inner critic here! I've become so anxious and fearful over the years because of hyper focus on my incompetence, weakness and failures. Even times I misspoke, pronounced a word wrong or struggled to make conversation are frequent instances that haunt me at bedtime.
I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching the video. What tips will you use first to stop ruminating? If you’re interested in videos on taming the inner critic, you can find them at: ru-vid.comsearch?query=innercritic Here’s the video on embracing imperfection: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-t32r-CJMXcw.html
@@DocSnipes thank you! I will continue to watch, learn and practice. I will start with asking myself if I can learn or improve anything for next time...if not then I will stop the thought and redirect it to things I'm grateful for. I will try to focus on facts not current feelings or emotions. Alotting myself a small box of time to ruminate each day and not at bedtime is a good idea too.
You’re most welcome. I am sorry you’re struggling with rumination. I appreciate you watching the video and I’d be grateful if you were to share what you found most useful from it. Also, if you're interested in more videos on the topic or if you want to explore my video library, you can use my AI: allceus.com/AskDocSnipes.
👍💯Thank you Dr Snipes for all your efforts and time. Simple language. Concise. Directly addressing the issue. Giving solutions to walk away with. Thank you 🙏 for the peace 🕊health 🩹⛑and love 💗 light 🕯
Exceptional practices and information! You give solutions. Wow! I appreciate the ACOA ones, even though, mine would be ACOC (Crazy or Psychological abusive).
@@DocSnipes Thank you for the recommendations. I am way past middle age and I would like to finally silence the inner critic. I don't want to be breathing my last and listen to the critic telling me I'm not doing it right.😀
I really am enjoying your videos so much. How do so make progress without therapy though? I have no health insurance and my boyfriend of 7 years broke up with me and I have BPD and am really not coping well at all. I don’t know what to do.
Your question was covered in today's live presentation, about 5 minutes into the presentation. It will be available on the channel page, by going to the live dropdown.
@Doc Snipes, have you done a video on coping with folks who won't get into treatment? Ex. Elderly folks with untreated PTSD who won't get treated but go on to dump all their issues whenever visited. This leads me to spend time trying to figure out the issues and come up with helpful info (which invariably gets rejected). Very challenging to get back my equilibrium but since this is a close relative I can't completely remove myself from relationship and seeing them in (pain, anger, frustration etc.) leads me to want to help, only to be rejected again and so it cycles on. Not exactly ruminating but similar, except not stimulated by my own internal thoughts. Hope you see this! TIA
That's a really good question. My experience of PTSD is that rumination is not a thing for me. Intrusive thoughts to some extent and these are usually about injustices I've encountered . What I've learned is that most people, even therapists, don't validate that you had these unjust injurious experiences. (Most people really don't care what you've suffered and therapists are often too keen to get on with formulaic 'treatment'). So you're stuck with injustice. It's like a pressure cooker that has no release. No one should have to just suck up injustice - there are rules and laws that are supposed to protect us and right wrongs. Too often they don't. If you've got a lot of time then I guess that sense of 'unrequited injustice' becomes rumination? If I need to talk about some element of the injustices, validation from a trusted source usually sets me right side up again. It's not the 'solutions' that sort me out, mainly because what's done is done and the time for justice is long gone. It's the being genuinely heard and the validation and empathy. It's as simple as that. Do you know all your relative's story? I mean ALL of it... It'd be interesting to hear Dr Snipe's thoughts.
IMHO I suggest you read about karpman triangle of pain and the caring triangle. You are playing the role of Rescuer for your relative only to get him playing the Persectuer over you. This is also called the drama triangle and it just gets you in constant pain. If you want to help someone try to turn off emotions and do not enter this triangle by playing any of its parts.
Thank you @Iggle and @Aya Elzarka, very helpful comments. Yes, the relative seems to be ruminating but you're quite right it is being used to make others feel bad. I will look for more info on Karpman's Triangles and make a note to just listen with empathy and validation to my relative. Maybe that will help me in my need to rescue/solve her problem.
It sounds like what you are dealing with is treatment resistance and resistance period. Behavior is communication. I encourage you to watch the video on addressing noncompliance and treatment resistance. It could also be a cultural issue. Counseling is not embraced by many generations and PTSD and the concept of mental illness is often seen as shameful or a weakness ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE--eimguk0bSE.html Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.
I would argue against turning off emotions. They are there for a reason. Mindfully accept emotions and explore what they are telling you. How can you improve the next moment as they say in DBT. Ultimately the only person you can control is yourself.
