I’m 40 he’s 30, it’s been 2 years and I’m almost due with his first child. Never a dull moment, his energy keeps me going ♥️ He’s the love I never knew I needed.
My #2 husband is 17 yrs younger then me. I was 40 & thought he was around 30 after a few months I found out he was only 24. Everyone thought it was just a booty call & have us 6 mo's. Here we r 20 yrs later with an 18 yr old son. He considers my kids & grandkids & I know he loves them. Best man I've ever met & don't regret 1 minute of the last 20 yrs.
The age gap shouldn't be a problem. My wife is 44 and I'm 33 and we been together since 2015 and between us there's never been a issue but people seemed to have a issue with it.
I am dating a guy 20 years younger than me and have been facing since then tons of prejudices - MY prejudices, not his... He instead is very openminded and uncomplicated.
Yes I have recently started dating a man whom is 22 and he is such a breath test f fresh air it’s almost scary but I like it and I’m 32 and we are having a pretty good relationship and I pray it goes even better with time 💜😊
Thank you Mat and everyone who has commented. I feel so much better about my feelings for a guy who is 21 years younger than me. I was worried but now I am going to let go of those beliefs and enjoy the experience and hopefully the rest of our life in love
Well said! If you're wondering whether you're ready to dive back into the dating scene, check out our new quiz: 'Are You Ready to Date Again?' It might provide some helpful insights! 💖 mat-nlcmdzyq.scoreapp.com/
It's funny how men have dated women young enough to be their grandkid since forever but when women date even 10 years younger there was a weird stigma around it until only the last 5 or so years where people realizing age doesn't matter as long as you're adults
As a 41 year old, I had a wonderful sexual relationship with a 25 year old, this year. Now, I’m with a more marriage minded man who just turned 27. This year has been the BEST I’ve had in a long time. Both have taught me just as much as I’ve taught them. It’s an incredible feeling to be playful and let go, allowing them to give me their masculine energy. Happy Loving, Ladies!
I’m also 59 and my bo 25- I wish it were more excepted in general. People immediately assume there is something wrong with him or me… Beat chemistry I’ve ever experienced.
Men around my age (50) are damaged & I've not had good luck. Now dating a man 12 years younger & an exceptional communicator. I'm totally falling for him & so happy we found each other in this crazy world. 🤪
Sold!! 💓 I so agree with you, the 25 year younger man that I am seeing, has taught me to be free again, and reconnect with myself. I say go for it! Life is too short not to enjoy it!
HELLO beautiful Queen How are you single man no kids looking for one Seriously. 24 years old but age is not important for a good relationship with a woman
I love your videos. I’m 61 and he’s 44. We started with the intent of being casual three months ago. He has definitely taught me to be more vulnerable and open. I think I’m showing him that it IS possible to spend time with a woman who will support that he’s going to go sailing for a month or whatever makes him happy. He can be present because he wants to be and not because he feels he has to. He has been contacting me more often. He’s started sharing things he’s doing, showing me pictures. It has been an intense sexual experience from the start and we are now wanting to actually talk and get to know each other. Seems backwards, but what started out as hot sex is now evolving in a real interest in each other. The more freedom he has, without feeling guilty, the closer he has become. I’m learning a lot. Thank you, Matt. ❤️
I feel like younger men tend to lead with sex, that is, their libidos are sorta in control...but this becomes a terrific asset when we can get to know the beautiful man that is emerging in front of our eyes. As older women it is our responsibility to lead by example and I feel like my man (im 50 and hes 26) is eager to learn. I am always fascinated by him and his utter passion for life that hasn't yet developed into cynicism, and hopefully if we say together for a while, he will learn to set back and flow with it like I do. Im so happy to read stories like yours because I know I have a wonderful supportive community to turn to if I ever feel shaky or uncertain. Thank you again to Mat for facilitating the public that may not normally have a good network of support from friends and family.
4 years isn't a big age difference. Even 10 years isn't a big age difference if you're both over 30. However an age difference where the one person is of the same generation as the other's parents, that's where it gets cringe worthy.
I needed this. I'm 42 and started a relationship with a 28 year old. I have anxieties about the age gap. The things you mentioned put me at ease. Thank you.
I’m 43 and my bf is 31. … so far it’s working despite things like He wants to have a lot of kids and thought at the beginining that I couldn’t 😱 of course I can
My partner is 25 years younger. It was only meant to be a summer fling but here we are 8 years later and planning to marry next year. We are crazy about each other, lovers, best friends and partners in crime. I didn't have much when we met as I'd been a single mum for years, so he definitely wasn't after my money! He has never wanted kids so that made it easier. I do sometimes worry about the future but he just says that no couple knows what the future looks like and whatever challenges come along we'll face them together. We rarely think about the age gap and our friends and family are so used to us being a couple they forget about it too. Don't know why there's so much hate online about AG relationships.
Hi Mat! You have become my favorite relationship coach by FAR! I just wanted to say that I have recently started dating a man 24 years younger than me and at 1st I was a little bit terrified, but he is SO proud of me, has already told his mother and all his friends about me. I have never felt so ADORED by a man and I cant help but surrender to the wonderful way I feel when I'm with him...almost like my first high school crush! I going for it, Im all in and wherever it goes, I'm going to have FUN the whole way!! I deserve it!!!
I just got divorced (amicable) form a man 21 years older...and now I'm dating a man 10 years younger! (it's brand new) I'm so into these beautiful, sweet, fresh younger men. I have a few I'm seeing, they ARE men, ladies, just younger. Many of them are serious and capable, don't write them off!
I'm shocked by the comments! Reading about women dating men 20 years younger than they are... When I spent 2 years wondering about if I should give a chance to a guy 6 years younger than me. Anyway, interesting video :) Thanks
I’m glad I found this. I’m crazy about a younger man. Everyone says no he’ll just break your heart. ♥️ Last guy I dated was the oldest and the least mature! He looked great on paper but he was so mean spirited. I’m willing to take it slow and see where this new one goes. The chemistry is fabulous.
Agree with everything you just said. My live in caregiver for my husband of 2 years passed and he remained in my home as a renter. He approached me with his feelings for me and I thought he was nuts! He is 39 and I am 71! A month ago I realized we have developed a strong friendship and compassion so took the step romantically. All I can say as he has taught me more then I have about being happy again.
Just turned 68 and he won't be 40 til September, over here! In fact, he said 40 at first because he knew that'd give him a fighting chance. Am I ever glad I did! The Universe has reminded me how it feels when two people are head over heels and too, that every man hasn't fallen for all society's messaging.🎉❤ I feel so seen and loved.
Im 61 and he's 29 going on 4 yrs together. Love him so much , everything you said here is spot on. Mine although young has had a lot of trauma but he rises above.
I divorced at 30 years old, and around a year later I met a lovely woman who was 42 years old. We both caught a lot of grief from family members who disapproved of our relationship. She had 2 grandchildren, and I had a 5 year old son. Her daughters stopped talking to her, and I had family members giving me a hard time. The pressure from both sides took a toll on the relationship , and we both agreed to part ways after a year together.
@@Mat_Shaffer well this younger guy is very mature in his thinking.. And he doesn't have baggage from past.. He's understanding.. He listens he likes to spend consistent time with me, he doesn't want children but wants to travel the same as me.. He's a man that knows what he wants.. He has good goals and he is a man that makes me feel safe.. I know that older men can be like this too... But I've not found any.
I needed to see this! I've just met this wonderful young man in his 30's (I'm 53) and he's fun, upbeat and very positive! So refreshing. There's a mutual attraction and we enjoy similar things, (like playing online MMORPG games, like Sci Fi, Anime, etc. (we're both geeks!) I'm looking for someone to do fun things with, and enjoy the good things in life. He makes me feel great! He's youthful, full of energy and ambitious. It's wonderful to meet someone not burdened from the harder experiences of life. I've been pretty much on my own for 12 years after the passing of my husband and he's the first fellow I've met that I can be completely myself. :) That question about whether he'd want to have a family (kids) in the future did go through my mind, but if this connection gets more serious, I will ask him about it. But for now, I just want to enjoy his company. :)
I'm 32 this year and connecting with a 28..meeting him soon. I've been going out with men older than me but so far he's the only one who can really communicate clearly. Interesting.
I am 46 he is 32 and our relationship is great. The best I've ever had. And despite the age difference, we are very similar and want the same thing. Remember that no relationship is perfect, everyone struggles with theirs, so age shouldn't matter. Thanks for your video, I'm a fan ❤️
@Marin Cuculic Yeah, cuz I'm not trying to chat up vague YT profiles, I like the lady I am currently seeing. Good luck with your recycled "charming" line, I guess.
@Marin Cuculic She's older than me... So that why I watched this vid. I commented because I think your "charming" line is cheesey when its so shallow.... Just seems so thirsty. But hey, do you, bud.
i'm glad i stumbled over this video and read the comments. me and my boyfriend started as friends. it's been 5 years (i'm 30 now, he's 25) and he's talking about marriage and kids. i needed some advice from people who have been there ( i'm expecting backlash from both our families). and i realise now how lucky i am to find love and friendship in the same person.
So true Dr.Love!!!.... Love my younger guy to bits and I have learned sooooooo much from him. We do have a huge strength...he's a man man and I get to just lean back. We definitely have that dance down pat. I think what he looooovvvveeeesssss the most about me I just let him be him. I recognize the particular stage of life he's in so he has AMPLE room to grow and stretch....which makes it very interesting because I just let him come to me when he can. This may seen like a terrible thing to do but autonomy is something no one seems to remember about and since he gets that freedom with me I see not only the strength of his best self but I also see the other sides of his prism.. It makes me love him more and also I found it creates a stronger connection...
@@MonicaSancio nope...I enjoyed our relationship and stayed dedicated to him because that's what I wanted... If you find yourself needing to have options open then just date till you find what you want...💙💙💙
Thanks Matt. I really feel more comfortable around older ladies. i've tried dating younger girls but it just doesn't work for me. I really feel relieved after watching a couple of your videos.
I couldn't agree more with you, Mat....more particularly about point 4, I had a relationship with a man 28 years younger than me and I learned so much from him! He had an impressive knowledge and culture, it was a pleasure discovering things I didn't know in arts, science, tourism etc. I often told him how much I admired him for that (and it made him very proud, of course 😊).
I needed this today!! I’m head over heals about this guy that’s 33 & I’m 53,, no one understands!! My heart is so full of love for him! It’s not just a thing it’s been 8 months an my feeling haven’t changed at all! We’ve been together twice an it was beautiful! Trouble is I believe he’s fighting his feelings for me! I could be wrong but that’s what I feel with all my soul! I adore him and then I think rationally,,, what’s our future really?? Where could this actually go from here? My heart broken
Number 4 is absolutly right. We give each other knowledge on everything. I´´ ll miss him some day because the gap is high. but it´´ll be one of the best times in my life.
OK Mat... this is actually rather funny. All the things you listed off as to what a younger man can teach you, is EXACTLY why i prefer a younger man. To me i have a better connection to them then i do older men or men my age. Their energy level, their playfulness, the way they view things...i just find that i can feel free to be me without worrying about being told I'm too old to be acting that way or too old to enjoy my life and the spontaneous things that cross my mind that i do. If I decided to have a water gun fight with my guy then he's down for it... an older guy not so much. I get met with a grumpy fest over it. I may be 45 but my mindset still likes to play in my early 20s. 🤷🏻 lol ❤
He's 35 and I'm turning 43 it's just been casual but the goal for me is to go out on dates and see if there is compatibility that can develop... I don't want it to continue where I develop feelings and then he's found someone else to be in a relationship with. Been down that path way too many times
I am 40 and he is 32 and the longer it went the more feelings we got for each other. It’s been almost 2 years now. But… I worry for later in years… because I would be much more comfortable if it was on reverse 🤣
I Really needed this talk : I adore and have a very exciting physical relationship with a younger man. But want to not get hopes up for long term yet open to & enjoy each moment with.
@@tinadraper9143 why wouldn't he? People can't tell ages anymore. We broke up after a year and a half but my ex before was 24 and I was 42. We lived together for 2 years, he wanted to get engaged I didn't. Stop doubting yourself
I’m happily married to a younger man 8 yrs younger than me but before him during my single yrs mostly my suitors were younger men😄 . I never dated a divorced man with kids specially older than me because i don’t want to have competition and usually they look much older than me 😂😂
Thank you so much. My boyfriend is 22 Iam 31 and we love each other so much.it started like friendship now we are so so happy. And people say we are the same age 😄
OMG am even afraid his 22 am 27 already trying to stop it cause in African culture I'll be seen as a devil but he loves me I don't know whether to stick to it or
I am in a relationship with a man 12 years younger. The perspective of this video is very true in my experience. Going over 1 year. Not sure how long it will last, but who cares. I let go and we just have a good time loving and caring for one another one day at a time!
Grateful to read the comments here. I have been seeing a younger man who is 22 Yrs younger than I am off and on for 3 years….i was concerned about the age gap but after reading the comments here, I feel a lot better. We just have this attraction to each other and have learned to accept that age, height, status doesn’t matter. Life is short, been married 2x’s had my heartbroken, and admit friends have criticized me for only being with younger men. The youngest guy I was ever with was 38 Yrs yet I wasn’t looking for a long term relationship with him. After being treated badly by the ex hubbies I had, I am happy that the guy I now see said “age is just a number & I am attracted to you” that I gave him a chance. No relationship is perfect but I encourage everyone to be open to guys who are younger, because age is just a number. Bless all of you here.
I am not able to connect with you through zoom apps. It is confusing me. Is there any shortcut way to connect with you Shafer? I am eager to know please help me to reach you directly.
I'll be 62, he will be 44. Our sexual-ship, high sex drive matches. Going on 15 months. Not dating, but that's what we agreed on in the beginning. So far, so good! Those limiting beliefs creep in at times, insecure thoughts and feelings. With being intimate, those feelings are real and an emotional connection has developed, even though he hides it. Not me...that's the part where he says, he doesn't want to hurt me. Well, I don't want to hurt him either. I take care of me and my home along with other things that go along with being a homeowner. Him too. So be it! And, so it is!
I love the energy of younger men, the openness, they are curious about a lot of things and they truly WANT to know how things work, how I work, what I feel and like and they have this willingness. Guys around my age (35+) is, in comparison and generally speaking, lazy and they just fall into old habits of doing things. Since dating younger men I find it really hard to even be attracted to men around my own age, they do not excite me even the slightest most of the time🤭 And most of my insecurities about how I am or how my body looks, after having two kids, is just what the younger men love so I’m learning to a appreciate and owning my body just as it is and I’m truly grateful for it💛
I am currently dating a man 27 years younger. He is more mature and puts more effort into spending quality time with me than any other man my age. It is astounding. You are spot on in your video. I am molding him into what I want and welcomes growing at my side. Society needs to stop judging and let live.
We're older. I am almost 75 and he will be 68 this year. One of the things he told me younger women only want sex or to use him. We have fallen in love, he wants to get married and I am hesitant and told him we'll know when the time is right. He is very independent and so am I
I’m 71, he’s 44, we began by becoming very close friends fairly quickly. About to enter our 9th year, been legal partners now for five and a half years. Best relationship I’ve ever had.
This gives me hope. My 62, his 40. Quite a span, and both of us have baggage, just different types. His kids (one disabled) demand all of his time right now. Praying that after we are able to live in closer proximity, things will naturally fall into place.
I deeply appreciate this discussion. It has let me accept what I truly need. After all the frustrations I have had with dating and marrying older men, I believe I will open myself to dating more younger men. I get plenty of attention from them, I just haven't taken younger men seriously...Sorry about that younger men out there.
Great video, Mat. Thank you! I met a younger man 3 months ago for work. I felt like we hit it off from the first time we met. He is fun to be with. I do feel younger. But the fact that he is HR is unsettling. I typically keep HR at arm's length. And head hunters usually do not care to get to know me, but he seems to be interested in knowing what is going on in my life. I sense that he is a major flirt and he knows he is attractive. So I am taking it slow. I do not share much and I am friendly, but not coming on strong. I need to see if he is worth my affection or if he is just a fun work friend. It could get complicated mixing work with pleasure. I am not sure what to do.
@Marin Cuculic He is still in my life. We talk less often. I think he still wants to get to know me though. He knows that I welcome his honesty and he can be more himself with me.
@Marin Cuculic Sorry for not replying sooner, got busy. If you only want to chat because of my age, then I have to decline. I do not choose people solely based on age. It would feel too contrived or calculated for me. It is just as odd as someone being intimidated because of my age. Thank you, but no. I hope you find what you seek.
@Marin Cuculic I appreciate your honesty. My decision is still the same. I want to focus my energies and time on myself and my family, especially during this pandemic. I need to be more mindful of me. Please accept my apology. I want to be fully present for my family right now. I take my responsibilities seriously.
Wow.. Didn't know i would fall in love wirh your content and change my perspective in this aspect so instantly as this ia the first video in watching of yours and ive already hit thw subscribe button too😄 thank you so much dear. This is the video i really needed... ❤
What revelation,i am 64 and going to start a relationship with a 36 year old man,i love him very much ,and he also loves me,we talk about the future,but it is always in the back of my mind that i am so much older,and he always says that age is just a number, so i will dive in because i don’t want to have any regrets to miss out on a great love,i’m going to enjoy him and our relationship.
Hi Matt, can you share or perhaps do a video on how to respond when a younger man asks you out and how or when to talk about the age difference please? I often have to repress laughing out loud because it catches me off guard. Your feedback would be so appreciated! 🙏🏻
I’ve just had a one year relationship with a man 23 years younger than me. It’s the best relationship I’ve ever had. I’ve never experienced so much affection and happiness. I’m the first long term relationship he’s had and I knew it couldn’t last. I’m struggling now with him not being around but I know I need to let go so he can go and live his life. I’m glad I had that amazing year with him.
😊 must say I’ve had some very interesting conversations with younger men . And trust me it was most definitely not a fling intention.. very intense... yeah
Is it common for younger men to want older women, though? How would you feel about doing a video about why it might be good for men to date older women - not necessarily for men, but to encourage older women?
I started seeing a 34 year old (I just turned 63) 3 months ago- we talk/text daily and he comes over every 3-4 days- you are so RIGHT! He has taught me to be present, not so rigid and judgmental- he leads in the bedroom and I lay back in my feminine energy- Ladies, if you’re considering a lover or relationship- let go of your inhibitions- you won’t regret it
I've subscribed to online dating just recently out of curiosity. And I wonder why there's a lot of younger handsome men who want to chat with me when there's a lot of younger woman who's more sexy and attractive. Now I know and understand 😚 Thank you Mat Shaffer💖
From my observation older men who date much younger women/girls are mostly insecure immature and expect women to throw themselves at them because of money and other superficial reasons. And lot of fake and unhappiness in those couples. However when older women are in love with younger men/boys, it’s usually genuine love and in happy and healthy relationships.
I agree with everything said in the video. I met an older guy from dating app whos 28 he was he was still dealing with a recent break up with a ex of 5 years. He kept bragging about how difficult it is and how’s he emotionally unavailable.
I actually like this guy who is 5 yrs younger than me. I thought we were the same age. But connection is connected. I will still date until I get a set date from my future husband.
İ'm dating a man who is 37(i'm 31) hə behaves like a 17 year old boy. Soccar and fruends are more important than me. I Was taklking to a 22 year old man, and damn he is so much more mature. Not in the way of Sex or something but in the way hə Sees life and his ideas.
Right dated a men 22 age gap older then me I'm 31 but he acted like he was 17!! I'm willing to date my age or a little bit younger than me ..I'm still not married or have children can't stand it anymore she is nothing but a number.
Very nervous about dating a man in his 50’s and I am in my 60’s. I am in shape and ready to date. We have a lot in common. Flirting right now and my heart is racing. After back and forth I asked him to go for a walk on this beautiful trail or coffee as he doesn’t drink. No answer. So, I did my own thing for 3 months. I had to reconnect for a job and did so reluctantly. Sparks are flying but nothing as far as a date! Maybe he just likes flirting, smiling and joking…hard to read him. He said it is great to see you.
I agree with absolutely everything in this video! I’m 48 and he’s 30. It started as primarily sex but now we’re in a serious committed relationship. He has even started talking about marriage. I think it’s been a great balance I think we learn from each other. I think it’s a very healthy relationship. ❤
I am dating with someone 12 years younger than me and everything works wonderfully between us, not only the chemistry, but also the balance of power between men and women.. we are balanced, we joke a lot, we have a lot of joint programs, he gets along well with my teen children!! I learn a lot from him, he is very open, he supports me in everything and what is wonderful is that he truly and honestly admires me and loves. I was afraid in the beginning..but already not.
The thing with older guys is true. I went to a social group not dating one and all the older guys I spoke to had a lot of emotional baggage and story's on how they were played. Very uncomfortable to be honest also I was the youngest one there.
This message is so inspirational, thank you. Spirit is introducing me very soon to my younger Kingdom spouse and I confess I have a bit of concern about our significant age difference and will keep this information in mind.
Plenty of women, like me, did not really want to have kids, either. I do not like the term "cougar" because we don't have a bad word for men who are 20-30 years older than a woman. It's not fair. Plus lots of older men are newly divorced and just want sex.
I've always dated guys younger than me because I have always had a young energy, I am quite this tomboy in my spirit who plays videogames to this day (I'm a 42 year old teenager lol)... but this year I fell in love with a guy who is 44 and full of baggage, traumas, and he can't even see the serious emotional hurts he has and that he bleeds all over other people, doesn't go to therapy and is not willing to change. I was deeply hurt when he broke up with me out of panick and the I decided I was going back to give more chances to younger guys (my lower barrier was 32, but now I'm giving chances to 20 somethings). I've had more mature conversations than I had in 2 years. I'm loving it and hopeful I will find my guy.
