I feel like life was better before social media. I don’t know anyone who feels good after wasting time on it, nevertheless we’re addicted. I can’t seem to do any chores without something playing in the background, for example I was doing the dishes while watching this exact video. Thinking back to the good old days where we were focused on the task at hand, even watching something you had to sit in front of the TV not carry it around with you everywhere, life was simpler and happier.
I feel social media has ruined society in general! I don’t use anything but RU-vid and follow a handful of women and groups who search for missing people in water, and Facebook on a rare occasion only to see what my extended family and friends from far away are doing. It sucks you in, gives you a false idea of what people’s pictures and posts mean theirs lives are better than yours, etc. And it has given people the permission to behave however they want and let go of some of their values and morals. Just my experience
Delete it!! I am only on RU-vid for content creation now. Or to watch videos about things to better my life. And my relationship with my spouse, bff and kids has sky rocketed 🎉. We don’t need to share photos with everyone. Or to scroll mindlessly. Just share with family and friends via text. It’s more personal that way. I swear it’s the biggest life changing thing I’ve done outside owning my own house.
I quit ALL social media a few months ago and I only allow myself to watch youtube videos when I am doing chores as company and background sound or to learn something new. Life is SO much better without it. and I was surprised how much I just lost my taste for it after about a week of detox from the FOMO. I replaced it with Masterclass and doing things during the day that help serve my family and community and church. I have replaced social media time with intentional relationships and 2 x a week I join other moms in person for coffee. It's like living in the 90's again and it's fantastic!
I too have done this! I got off social media a year, almost 2 years ago. I am happier. I do exactly like you, listening/watch videos to learn and keep in touch loosely with what is going on in the world. I meet with moms in person. I live in the "real" world with real relationships. I would highly recommend to all - dump social media. It is not worth your mental and emotional peace
I’ve been doing this for 5 years and love it. Haven’t been on social media in 5 years could care less what anyone else is doing. Staying in my own lane running my own race.
Something I've learned lately is that our modern lives are SO different from our great grandparent's generation. We are more isolated socially. We live far away from family and friends. We work constantly away from home. Great grandma never had to worry about a babysitter for an emergency because she was well connected with her neighbors. She never had to worry about who would care for her and her children if a new baby arrived because her mom and siblings were close by. She never had to worry about constantly keeping the home clean because she owned much less. She never had to worry about the morning school carpool because the kids were taught at home or walked to school. We are in an inherently selfish society. I personally don't ask for help from anyone because I know there is no such thing as no strings attached, and family members have their own agendas now, too. I don't have friends nearby. My church community is far spread. So as a modern woman I choose to take advantage of every technological advancement that I possibly can to keep up with the modern, isolated circumstances of my life. Robot vacuums. Car washes. Electric mop. Grocery delivery. Housekeeping help. Delegating as many tasks to other sources so I can stay on top of it all. But it comes with a price, and I'm not sure I am willing to pay it.
It's a lonely type of life.. and western societies are the ones practicing it the most. It's not that way where I come from.. One thing that comes to mind is that it must have happened with the emergence of a bit of a narcissistic generation of parents who didn't want to care for their offspring for too long which in tern produced kids that did not feel obligation to care for their elderlyarents and sending them in homes... Life should be a village.. of family and friends not isolation... I don't know why it has to be...
@@BlueBlossomsBluesthe only time I think it's OK to seek help with your elderly parent is if they develop dementia or alzheimers. Those illnesses are very difficult to deal with at home. Other than that, my parents are free to stay here. I just don't know how it's done when there's multiple of them. Between my husband and I we have my mom, my dad and stepmom, and his mom and dad. Where do they all go?
I hear ya, my roomba changed things. I hated vacuuming before. Now I will go around and do a deeper clean with the broom or hand vaccuum every now and then but the roomba takes care of the day to day and our house STAYS clean which I love. Technology can be a wonderful thing!
Even when I lived close to family it wasn’t a guarantee I’d have help or support. My grandma lived five minutes away and we never saw her. Sorry to be contrary, just sharing my experience.
Whenever I’m tempted to fall into the comparison trap, I remind myself that just because other people have certain things, it doesn’t mean they can afford them. Better to have less with no debt.
Glad you made that point in the end (22:57) about being obsessed with self-help, self-love, self-improvement. It's making a culture of (sometimes) well-intentioned narcissists
Reason why I, so far, have rejected listening or reading to any type of self improvement advice.. Well, I guess except from people I’ve known for a while/know their lifestyle/motives/beliefs.
In terms of overcoming the apathy you talked about and feeling unmotivated, i heard something that really resonated with me from the Minimal Mom : movement is motivation. Once you are up and running it is much easier to be motivated
Full time working single mom, and so thankful to work from home now, as being relieved of the pressure of dressing for the office and being out the door on time is huge. But even still, from the moment I wake up, to the moment I’m in bed, I’m working… and always feel behind. But I make time to read with my kids every single night… it’s therapeutic for all of us, and I know when they grow up, they will always remember 💛 And we make time for prayer every morning and evening…. I know He keeps me going 🙏🏽🌼
Same friend. I’ve done it on my own 7 years. My baby is now 17. Older kids are 22 and 24. They DO remember and your time and attention will pay dividends. ❤🙏🏻. Stay strong in the Lord!!
I love what you are saying. It ring true for so many of us. I'm 50 now and my youngest child is 16, but I have to say that a lot of people who work outside the home really underestimate how many hours a stay at home mom does every day. Its not like an 8 or 12 hour shift of work then you go home...no, its a 24/7 work schedule. A homemaker does multiple jobs at a time. They are the cook, cleaner, book keeper, child care, pet care, shopper, manager , yard maintenance etc. They do so many things everyday and yet receive little to no acknowledgement because they dont work outside the home. A family household dont truly understand what the mom or stay at home person truly does daily that makes their lives easier. ❤
“ We were meant to live in small communities.“. Omg you are right! People were not necessarily meant to know what is going on on the other side of the nation, what some stupid Congress person said or what’s happening in Europe that is concerning… You are so correct
My Facebook was hacked and I could not get into it, turns out it was one of the best things to happen to me. I didn’t realize how bad it made me feel when I would check it every morning. You are so wise, thank you immensely for your videos. I always leave with encouragement on how I can better my family’s life and sometimes some hard truths to fix. ❤
I’m only 8 minutes in and honestly you are encouraging me so much and I can now see how I have fallen back into some bad time wasting habits. You are absolutely right about letting social media and news control the emotional quality of your life. I am currently staying off every platform except the channels on RU-vid I am already subscribed too so that I do not see more coverage of the war in Israel. I am praying for them constantly but my heart cannot handle the details while im caring for my own sweet children who only know that we are now praying for those people from the Bible who, yes, still exist. 😅
Your opening statement Ang- I used to feel so guilty because before I got sick 11 years ago I was ocd about my home being clean, bank stuff always updated, etc. everyday now I struggle to move or not feel sick due to pain and I have had to learn I can only do what I can when I can. Giving yourself a little space and grace is a big help
RU-vid can tell you all about the 3-second intro clips, but if I (adult with ADHD) want to watch your videos i am totally staying to watch! No matter what. It helps me clean, plus it helps me fully enjoy my “alone” time to have simple and beautifully done videos like yours running in the background. I’m not necessarily watching the screen, just learning and being thankful that you’ve recorded some of your wisdom. It gets me through longer days when I’m alone at home with kids.
Yes yes yes! Especially with the social media. I am also someone who can’t put it down once I get scrolling. So 2 years after my first was born, I deleted ALL social media (except RU-vid). Best decision ever.
So many of these points hit home with me! I’ve been a stay at home mom most of my adult life and now our boys are grown. My husband is not ready to retire and is also busy with rental properties that we own. I spend a lot of time home alone. I feel like I’ve completely lost my purpose. I’ve been out of the workplace for so long and feel like I wouldn’t have much to offer as techy as everything has gotten. I feel like every day is Groundhog Day with the daily chores and motivation is a struggle. Thank you for this video! It’s helping me re-evaluate things!
Could you find a place to volunteer? I’m nearing the end of homeschooling (been doing so for 20 years with 6 to go). I’ve been thinking a lot about what I’ll do when I’m done. I’m a nurse but really don’t want to go back to that at age 61 (how old I’ll be when my youngest graduates). I’ll help with homeschooling my grandkids but I think I’ll volunteer somewhere too. Good luck to you. ❤
I started substitute teaching. I am not a certified. The pay in my small town is not great but I get out of the house, makes some kids smile, and have a little extra spending money.
@@singerjo5791 that’s funny you say that because that’s exactly what I’ve been thinking about doing. The Christian elementary school my boys attended recently posted that they are needing subs. My degree isn’t in education but they don’t require it. I’ve been struggling with it because change is always scary. Thank you for your response! I think it may have been confirmation that this is what I need to do. 😊
@@juliewright1895 I can totally relate to not wanting to return to your original field. I worked in accounting for years before my boys came along. My dad had pushed me to get an accounting degree instead of education because it would be more “lucrative”. I always felt like that was a mistake and that I missed my calling. I’m thinking substitute teaching may be an avenue I need to pursue. Thank you for your response and have a great weekend!
You could also take up a hobby 'job'. Like a craft you could sell on ETSY or at a local market. It doesn't really matter if it does more than pay for itself 😊
I needed this video. I'm a work from home momma to a 3.5mo old and I struggle hard with comparison & laziness/apathy. I have a fairly easy baby, but it doesn't change the fact that becoming a mom has been a big adjustment and it seemed like I saw other new moms who seemingly jumped back into routine like a week after having their babies. I started wondering what's wrong with me which led to not even trying which just made me feel worse.
Same girl!! Same … time passed and I allowed myself go with the flow(which was awfully hard) and now my oldest is about to be 6 and young one 2 and I look back and I see what stressed me back then doesn’t anymore and just recognizing that helps … so give yourself grace and just take this time to learn about you now and your baby, how you feel and how you think sending love ❤❤❤
I learned to be thankful with my little house with 1 bathroom. My perspective changed 8 years ago when I married and moved to Mexico. There's so much more to life than wanting a bigger kitchen or a bonus room. You are right.
This video was so good! Thank you for being vulnerable about your home reno/ money situation. We bought our first home a few months ago & it's still not "picture perfect" yet. Very encouraging to know that we're not alone.
This is such a valuable series, Angela. Thank you for taking the time to address these topics. This is just so relevant and needed right now, I’m super looking forward to the videos to come.
I work outside the home but I am definitely interested in your series on staying focused with productivity, house cleaning, etc. My time at home is very limited (evenings and weekends) but I am horrible about staying on task and prioritizing what order to get everything done! My kids are 4 and twin 2 year olds so all the help I can get would be greatly appreciated!!!
Home maker who home schools 4 kids… this resonated SO much. For the last few years, I’ve been on repeat saying to my kids, “One at a time, I can only do one thing at a time!” I thought maybe I was the only home maker out there who just can’t be the multitasking lady. It doesn’t work! So many other good points too!
OH boy Angela, you have hit the nail on the head with all of these topics. I have struggled with all the same things. I completely had to get rid of my social media because I could not control myself with reels and now can't even have RU-vid on my phone, because they now have reels. I do everything from my laptop which has to be plugged in all the time or it won't work lol so I can't just take it around the house. It has been both a blessing and a curse🙃 Life has honestly been so much better without social media. I don't compare myself nearly as much to others and I feel like I have allowed myself and my family time to slow down because of it. I feel like my relationships are more intentional as well. I feel like when I was on social media and people would post about things I felt like I knew what was going on in their lives already so I was not going the extra mile to check in. Now I ask people whats going on and now I go the extra mile to check in and have a real authentic relationship with my friends.
I feel like my mom when I was little had more to do as a stay at home mom than what we have to do now and yet less gets done now, even by people like my mom. My mom was a stay at home mom, she maintained the house, did the shopping, cooked, baked from scratch BC you couldn't get ready to bake everything, kept the dogs. Kids shows were off the air on weekdays by 11 and soap operas started which was when the kids ate and got booted to play, by 1pm soaps were over and the crazy shows like Ricki Lake etc came on and that's when my mom did self care and extra things around the house and outside, started dinner prep and she read a book every day or so. Now, I feel like what used to get done in a day is barely done once a week. It's so crazy! Then, we all wonder why our mental health is hit and poor physical health feels depleted bit it really comes down to "a body in motion stays in motion".
Well said Sis. You hit the ball out of the park with #2, and we must always mirror self in and thru all things. Blessings and gifts to you and yours. Time is a gift and may you grab and take hold of each minute given us.🙏
This spoke to me! I am a new mother with three kids! They are 4, 3, & 6 weeks. Idk if I still qualify as "new" but I've been struggling with almost all of these! I've been a SAHM for almost 3 years now and I'm struggling STILL to find my groove. I'm so looking forward to this series because I feel that I can take away a lot and hopefully improve MY life. ❤️
@@larissaalcorn3406 hang in there! Us as Mama's have so much on our plate! This is comforting in a way, I hope that doesn't come off wrong, but I always feel terrible when I feel like I'm not doing what I think I should be doing now that I'm 3 years in. I always feel like I should have a routine/schedule down and I don't. But I am working on it because I know the kids and I will thrive more if we have a routine. But one day at a time is what I try to tell myself these days.
Just discovered your channel. I am an older homemaker. I am a grandma and have seen so much over the years. This topic of attention is so true. At my age I have seen an increase in impatience and lack of attention.
Thank you I really needed to hear this. Iam a mom of 4 ranging for age 8-2. Iam 38 and have worked our side of the home until April of last year. I have struggled so bad adjusting to the transition. I also have Hashimoto's thyroiditis for 13 years now. I have struggled finding routines that I can stick to because most days is a struggle to even get out of bed. I think I may have ADD. I can't seem to focus on any one thing and bounce from one task to another without completing anything. I have done this for as long as I can remember. I create unrealistic goals for my self and become discouraged when I can't complete them. Because the last 8 years I had worked 12 hr swing shift opposite of my husband work has piled up around the house and I have become overwhelmed by everything. I also get discouraged when I spend all day cleaning just to turn around and see all of the effort destroyed in a second. I have workedbso long that I have lost contact with all of my friends and have only recently reconnected with two of my childhood best friends. This has been the encouragement that I have needed to fix my brokenness. I can not wait to listen to your other vedios. I like listening to them while iam cleaning because you give good seasoned advice that dosent distract my attention from what ever task I need to complete. Thank you and God bless you and your family
Very thoughtful and helpful video as always, thank you! I really like a tip from diaryofanhonestmom to focus on one of three P’s daily “Peace, presence and productivity” while raising little ones. Depending on how you’ve slept, what’s on the docket for the day etc. ask yourself what should be the main aim of the day and remind yourself of that throughout the day. It really helps to get some balance and not stress about achieving “everything” every single day ❤
I never subcribe to channels, but the content in this video is not just a repackaged version of the same old advice. I am so happy to have come across it because it really resonates with me, specifically the part about too many “productive” hobbies and looking at the comparison trap as a time waster… that one really uses an inordinate amount of my energy, even while doing productive tasks, and all too often contributes to my moments of apathy… Thanks!!!
“Self love can turn into a lot of self prioritization.” I feel like so many people need to understand that. “Self-care,” “me time” and the “boss babe hustle” can definitely become excessively self-centered.
I really appreciated how you approached this topic. We all need these tips and yet it’s so easy to feel like a failure as a mom and you didn’t make me feel that way at all. Thank you!
Maybe the odd man out but... as we are building our homestead I definitely care about the barns, buildings, and yes, even fencing! I don't compare ourselves but I definitely love getting future inspiration from others!
Love this topic! I have an attitude that I’m CEO of my home. Not to get rigid about life, but just to take all my tasks seriously and do my best with all my resources-especially time. Good categories and thoughts! Thanks! “And, oh! There’s a lizard outside!” Is that the Southern version of squirrel? Hehe! Have a great day!
The home making content you’ve been putting up is so encouraging and helpful! I have 6 children 9 and under, and we homeschool our biological children and our foster child goes to school. I have really had to learn to get my ish together recently.
Is your foster child required to attend regular school? I am seriously thinking about becoming a foster parent; however, my preference would be to home school so that is why I ask. Thank you!
@@Stephanie-rf9xs while I also homeschool my adopted kids, any school-age foster kids I do send to school and would do so whether it’s required or not. My thoughts being: the goal is always reunification and 99.9999% of the time (not a real stat 😉) if the child is reunified he/she will be attending public school so I want to keep a sense of familiarity. They will need to learn to cope and work with others in that environment. Likely different states have different rules on this but I’m not certain. That’s just always been my opinion for what it’s worth. Though I DEF prefer home education for my forevers ❤
Great advice Angela! ❤ I set so many daily goals and get disappointed if some are not done. I try to prioritize them, but often tend to still push myself and at the end of the week feel as if I was not productive enough, yet exhausted because I tried to do so much at a time, but getting very little completed(not speaking of housecleaning). My goal is to be able to check off at least 2 things per day as complete, so that I'm proud of me at the end of each week. I now need to start each week feeling refreshed in order to go forward with my week. Thanks for the reminder to self check, prioritize etc. ❤️👍🏼
Life is a process and I have chosen to breath and walk thru the process one at a time, being time is precious. what do you gain in trying to build a house in one day. I have chosen to handle life 1 day at a time. Tomorrow is so not promised to any of us.😊
These are all great points! The one that hit home the most for me is out of control hobbies. It's true that even if you enjoy them, they really can take up a LOT of time and eventually become an energy-suck without much in return.
Oh I am going through this right now as I’m a hobby gardener. Just bought 4 new raised beds and I’ll be filling it up with soil. It’s going to take me a few days to fill it in so I don’t kill myself 😂 Instead of relaxing this week on our spring break, I’m doing so much work outside. But I really love it though.
This message, I believe, was totally inspired. I have been thinking many of these things and to hear another mom voice them was very encouraging. You have such a beautiful and balanced view of these things and I really appreciate it. Thank you! BTW, I actually stopped trying to garden when I realized after 4 years in my new home, I just don’t get enough direct sunlight. It’s ok to give up that waste of time…for me and in this home! Sometimes even really “good” things can not be good for you in your season of life or your circumstances! Thanks for being vulnerable and sharing! I’ll be watching for the next video!
Reading a book called "Switch on Your Brain" by Caroline Leaf. She talks about multi-tasking as a brain destroyer! I thought it was a skill! She talks about training your brain to focus (I haven't gotten to that part yet.) I couldn't help but thinking of it when you mentioned #1.
The biggest realization was when I went off FB but kept messenger, yet only 2 people of 1500 "friends" outside my family, contacted me in 6 months! I took off all but 50 people and now maybe go on once a month to scroll or post and I am much happier and less stressed, my home is cleaner/more organized and I am trying new meals to cook.
I am home on Fridays and I have found that it is true that getting dressed abd getting ready for the day really helps me get things done. Pajamas give the sense of rest and make it so much easier to be lazy when we really do have things to get done. I make a to do list and include read 30 minutes on it so that I do not feel bad for resting during the day for a bit.
My home is a huge sticking point for me. It's very small and it means that we can't expand our family. I feel very jealous of all the lovely homes I see on Instagram. I'm going to try and give my home some TLC and turn off Instagram for a while. Thank you for this very helpful video.
Watching a video with a change of scenes every three seconds actually hypnotizes you. It turns off your reasoning part of the brain. So of course you will sit and watch and watch. Kind of scary and sad.
Love this series! I've been feeling so overwhelmed and overstimulated lately and it has had me questioning a lot. Yesterday I decided to not go Instagram or Facebook for the day, but I know I need to do more. So looking forward to this series!
Going along with your # 2 point with social media because of all the things people take in and the world's problems, it seems because of all that everyone has become so disconnected from actual compassion and caring about people they even know because of it ..its like a normal thing to see someone suffer that it's brushed off
Fantastic video!!! I will probably listen to it again to try to drill it into my brain. I struggle so much with focus and laziness. I have a horrible social media addiction, made worse because I’m always sitting at the table with my daughter while she (very slowly) does her schoolwork. I scroll so I’m not completely bored out of my mind.🙈 I can’t wait for the upcoming videos!
Will you still be doing homeschool videos? I’m proud to say I’m a minimalist and I include social media minimalism. I give my self one hour a day because I only need to watch what will feed my soul and will help my family. Also if I let me kids use screens for 1 hour a day I like to live by example. I wasn’t always like this. It’s been a 4 year journey but it is so worth it.
Good for you for being one of the few people including my odd ball self that isn't on TikTok. I love YT but I have to limit that, I love watching homeschooling videos. It can be overtaking and the news, yeah right now I don't watch any news unless it's life threatening to myself 😂
It’s like you read my mind with this subject.. Told a friend yesterday that I almost want a coach to come tell me what to do. Even said it out loud to myself: No one is coming! I think spending too much time in the same routine also contributes to the lack of motivation and complaining. The lack of aww makes me feel miserable. Bring on spring.. Hopefully some sunshine will also help with hormones and the gloom will dissipate. Thanks, keen to hear more tips. X
The only social media I use is YT, if that counts. I started by deleting the FB app from my phone so I would have to use my computer. And I would sign out so that I had to purposefully sign in to use it. But over two years ago I just stopped altogether. I miss some things about it but I’ve gained so much more that I don’t know if I’ll ever go back. I think it has ruined our society as a whole. And it is for sure a time stealer, among other things. I’m not a mother but I do not work outside the home. I choose to stay home and care for our home. I love it and have no desire to change it, and many of these tips apply to me as well.
I feel blessed to be retired at 70 son is 30 but I remember the day, but am with you time can stay one way always I hate springing forward I do wake up going to youtube first thing in the morning I look for you, frugal fit mom, and Mindy mom. each day
This is really good! NOT multi-tasking is definitely a skill I am working on! It absolutely is not helpful unless doing tasks half a$$ is your goal, lol!
I totally agree with the comparison game, I watch many RU-vid influencers regarding their home and their decorating styles and I find myself looking at my own home and not being happy and wanting to change everything. However, I also have always gotten board with the decor that I chose and I want to change it. So by watching my favorite influencers ( love you) I get the best ideas ever for change. I am 72 and from an early age just changing the furniture around in a room made me feel like it a new room. Now with the open concept I’m not able to move my furniture and I feel frustrated I love change and that was an inexpensive way to make me happy. Thank you for this video❤️❤️❤️❤️
Ya i think i should unfollow a couple you tubers i have been following for a couple year… i dont know why i got addicted watching a family who basically videos all the THINGS they buy and the multiple vacations they spoil their kids with… A few weeks ago I literally stopped myself and said, “what the hell is the purpose of this RU-vid channel? All they are doing is making people feel shitty about their own lives! They aren’t even offering any inspiration, it’s just, see what we get to do now!” 🤦🏼♀️🙄
#6 YES! Apathy. The other 5 can compound this. Comparing with others can make you think it’s pointless. Social media and hobbies suck up so much time and you leave you thinking you just don’t have enough time in the day, so who cares.
I’m a 63 yr old SAH homeschooling mom of 2 adopted grandchildren ages 12 and 10. At my age some days are a struggle! I appreciate your advice! The last few years have been rough with both of my parents passing and the drama associated with extended family. But I’m finally thru that and trying to get my focus more on the kids and their schooling and their lives. I have a tendency to get “obsessed” with whatever I get on my mind. For example: Ancestry. Working on that. It’s taken years but my sis and I finally figured out thru DNA and little clues my grandma had dropped here and there (she passed in 1984) who our paternal grandfather was. My bio dad passed never knowing who his father was. So I get on ancestry and then get side tracked because I will be searching for something and then see something else and think, “I better write that down while I’ve got it in front of me in case I can’t find it again!” So then I get lost for hours. And I don’t mean to. I pick up my phone to look at email or something and end up getting side tracked. Or now I finally am going thru my mother’s mess of old pictures (I need some of them for ancestry) and I can get lost in that for a day. I had the entire living room covered yesterday and the piano is still covered with pictures I plan to pass on to other family members. As a side note: while you are young, have someone older write down some of your family history. Right now it may not be on your mind but someday you will want to know it. Wish I had asked my grandma questions and other people in the family. I’m now in the oldest or next to oldest generation left in ours. My oldest son wants me to start writing a journal. So I will eventually. Around homeschool and regular life! Again, this video touched me a lot!
You don’t need to be on Instagram we love you hear. I too got rid of it for 2 months, and only checking in 2 X a week I get in and get the hell out, lol. It’s bad bad Instagram is a lie, the time it take to make a room over is not 30 seconds it’s 30 hours.
Goodness I needed to hear this! I work outside the home but I found this information very valuable. Since my time at home is very limited...the things that need to be done are still there when I get home from work. This cideo has reminded me that I need to be even more focused on my kids and all the homemaking things when I am actually at home. I'm a pittle farter when I get home at the end of the day 😂😂😂
