They only do it when the person is either their close friend or family or been there for years longer than you and if the person holds a higher role than you.
- they copy you: your writing style, your email templates, your revised email signatures, your work vocabulary, how you dress 😑 they’ll verbally tell you they notice changes with you and your work - they’re overly friendly (fake) but watch for the moments when they snap or have the jealousy stare - some will avoid you or won’t look you in the eye - they team up with other jealous losers on your team because small minded people feel powerful in numbers!
Never react. Be silent. Just be calm, composed and confident. Never show any form of reaction. Don't even look in their way. Treat them as if they don't exist.
I recently dealt with a jealous coworker by making a personal revelation about myself in a team meeting and let everyone say nice things about me. Not only did it take power away from her gossip about me, it put her on notice that all the managers now know about my personal identity and good luck trying to use it against me.
I wish I heard this sooner......I have gone through EVERYTHING you have stated here and more that I can't expose on social media........but guess what,I have come out shining through God's help!
I don't bite on any attempts to lure me into controversy at work. I smile & carry-on. I am secure & don't have time for those that insecure. That's their issue , not mine. Excellent advice as always 👍. Have a Great Day Jennifer 😀
Yeah sounds easier said than done. I did this and people don't react well to it. If.they have a position of power.and you.dont respond They will make you respond..or well..they did that to me by taking everything away from me and team with others to make me.crazy and bully me
@@M0101EP Don't let them sense your weakness or insecurity. You have to work on it if you're the "too nice" type. Once you're fed up completely, you won't take their sh*t. And yes, it is easier said than done. Good luck
This happens to me every job I've ever had. 1-3 guys hate me solely because girls like me, so they start spreading rumors, trying to make me look bad, and just being overall nasty towards me. It's not fair, because I'm a good guy and work hard, which is why I'm usually valued by management and get promoted.
Also be active in controlling the office narrative about you. If you made a mistake that caused trouble be the first one in your manager’s office to discuss it. The problem is that jealous coworkers will throw you under the bus by first telling your manager about the incident then finding fault with your performance when others issues might have been the problem like someone withheld information or opted to not train you how to do a task.
@@anonanonymous1970 Bullies don't respond to silence and kindness; they respond to power and consequence. The book Deliver Us From Bullies is Christian but the guy who wrote it is an expert on bullies and bullying. My first sentence is a quote by him.
I work in retail and my fem supervisor told me: Oh that was a easy sell 🥰 when I sold a high quality product. Now she stopped because I am constanly selling high quality products. Buuuuttt when she sold it too one time I came with the same sentence and her eyes popped 🤣🤣😁😁 I laughed sooo hard inside
When you have to work with a jealous colleague who is obsessed with you then all the advice out there is about trying to improve them by making them see their own value. But, it rarely works, and in reality you find their jealousy draining. Once its drained you so much you quit or get disciplined from reacting. There is another way. If you really think about it you know their weakness - jealousy. So whenever they are around make sure you are constantly doing things which make them jealous. If need be invent stories that make you seem amazingly valuable and be vocal so they can hear it. Just as they are draining to you, you are now draining to them. Work yourself into a state of mind where making them jealous is your drama, and let that dopamine flow. One of two things will happen. You will either drain them so much they quit, or they get disciplined when they react. Easy. A toxic employee tortures the talent, but the talent can also torture the toxic employee. And in that game the toxic employee quits first because they are the one with the hyper-sensitivity towards negative emotions. And its rarely limited to just jealousy. The funniest ones to torture are those who have to be in control. Boss them around.
When I first got hired at my current job I had to deal with this hot garbage behavior for six months until most of them had to leave to a different location. I literally had to get therapy because it caused cpstd. No it's not normal to do these things. It's also not normal to yell or scream at your coworkers as well. My personality changed from cheery and kind to angry and anxious. Jealous coworkers can be a sign of a toxic environment in general. These behaviors can be comorbid with other bad behaviors such as forming cliques, outright bullying, favoritism, harassment. Be careful out there.
I hate gossip especially in the workplace it creates negativity. I have had all the copy cat things happen to me . Thanks for these video s it made me see what’s missing in my life . I hate fake friendship s in the workplace .I’m a very positive person sometimes people don’t like this about me it’s weird . I love your videos
Being positive triggers people who are miserable. It shows them what they don't have - but instead of seeking out a path to cultivate positivity and happiness they stay miserable. I really feel bad for folks like that. Keep shining, Janna.
Most people are miserable and unhappy in life in this world. That’s why they despise happy positive people and wanna harm us. A lot of them hate life that’s it,
Strategically build as many alliances in the workplace that you can. Remain professional, do your work, interact with the boss when necessary and be personable and kind at those times. This + the alliances you build will neutralize some of the boss’ behavior. Definitely do not confront this boss with accusations of jealousy or anything else. You’ve gotta give things time to play out. S/he may warm up to you, be promoted/fired away from you, or simply promote you away because despite not liking you, your work is solid and you have so many allies in the workplace s/he’d look like an azz to not promote you.
Yup, apparently I also "talk too much" according to my supervisor. Even though she knew my "work area was always noisy" her solution was for me to "wear headphones" 😂
I offered a toxic lead to fist fight rather than him gossiping , undermining, attempting to bully me. He uses our union to protect him from termination , while at the same time he is a snitch even if it's lies. So I asked him for a fist fight to resolve this, which he declined. He now shows more respect for me. He actually did not snitch on me for this , accept a street fight, he flat out got punked. He learned a lesson, but I risked losing my job.Human resources is very toxic at my work and favor who they want.i would not have went this route if our HR department did their job!
I had many co workers in my last job that hated me and were extremely jealous. I befriended the boss as soon I got there worked extremely hard and asked extra for extra hours which in return she cut the hours of other co workers. My co workers would try to provoke me but I’m not easily provoke, so I provoked them back and they would lash out at me and this caused them to give the boss a bad impression about themselves. I socialized and became friendly with everybody and the older guys there hated it, not that I liked everybody there it’s just that people like friendly people, in a matter of a few months I got promoted to assistant manager and that caused even more hate and I loved it. Bottom line is if your gonna have people jealous of you for petty reasons or because you work hard, give them a real reason to hate you, make them lose sleep because of it. When they walk in to work give them a wink and show your best!
They can be jealous if you’re an attractive woman to. If you’re pretty, work hard, and seem pure inside they’ll be intimidated. I remember I worked with older women and they were so jealous of me that they’ll mention my age so much. It was really strange or they’ll make me feel like I wasn’t there.
Wow, you just described my coworker. She even bought a new car when I bought a new car, got a custom plate when I got a custom plate. I presented an idea to on how to gather meaningful statistics to help better protect the university from cyber attacks using threat intelligence. She just shot it down by saying things from it is unnecessary, over thinking the problem, to it is too complicated to execute. I even said I would execute it first in the test environment and she could beta test it but it never went anywhere because she convinced the supervisor it was too complicated and unnecessary. Later she knew I was kind of down about it because I was looking for a project to utilize my engineering skillsets, have a resume item, and to have someone on my annual evaluation, and she basically told me I need to learn to "keep my mouth shut".
I have recently been accused of being my boss's favorite. I feel the hostility coming from all my coworkers. Trying to sabotage me and there's lots of gossip. My plan is to quit. I have gone above and beyond for the team and I have helped a lot.
My bosses are like that but I don't give a sh##. I know who I am and I am playing their game. Criticism is good only if it is constructive with real base. Otherwise, it is jelaousy and their psychological issues.
When people have no talent (or less than you), their talent becomes making your life harder. I had a co-worker who was able to male a self-deprecating comment which was actually targeted at you. A very good skill. Too bad he had no other skills.
My coworker sold her car saying they didn’t need two cars. I drove past her a few times whilst she waited outside work for her hubby to fetch her and all of a sudden she breaks the news to me that she bought a new car and I shouldn’t tell anyone. She’s telling me because I have the same type, which makes no sense. She bought the exact same model and colour.
consider that a compliment! I had the same experience with a good friend who bought the exact same winter coat as me! When I told her it was the sincerest form of flattery, she never wore the coat again-------jealous people rarely think things through!
Definitely. I don’t speak to people I used to work with. I leave them in a close chapter with that ex-job. I don’t carry or hold grudges but I’ll never forget.
Everything you said (except imitation) occurred when my team got a new manager parachuted in during a hyper growth phase. I was a well established subject matter expert who had a higher salary than my boss. Wow did that ever put him out of sorts. I was too busy working to realize the level of undermining he was doing and he really managed to damage me. Fortunately he was eventually laid off but his unfair and unsubstantiated attacks on me still stuck even after he was gone. You have to pay attention to office politics and gossip even if you don't want to play that game. Especially if you are a heads down person just getting your work done
I had a colleague who did this nonsense and collaborated with a narcissistic boss when I worked for the Transportation Security Lab. His covert destruction forced me out. After borrowing books and getting suspended for an ethics violation, he accused me of stealing my own textbook back when his manager gave me my book back as a nice gesture when the undercutting colleague was on suspension. Other told me of his hatred of me but he only showed it at the end when he raised his arm at me after I refused to give him his work. The place was toxic.
This reminds me of how I behaved around an incompetent boss. The only thing I was jealous about was his salary, totally unfair given his competence level and the way he would take credit for his staff's work. He used to snipe at me and sabotage me and I would let off steam by complaining behind his back. Very toxic!
Ignore them and let your work speak for itself. At the same time strategically build alliances (especially with higher ups), do amazing work and be sure everyone knows it is your work (without being obnoxious about it). But also freely give others credit when warranted. Be positive and professional at all times. Do NOT go tit for tat. If necessary, have a 1-to-1 with the gossiping colleague (sometimes calling them out shuts them up) and/or write out your feelings in your journal at home. It will work out for you in the end. You need to give things time to play out.
The copying part is so accurate. Coworker got mad at me because I got my PTO approved for a weekend. He sent me a text during my weekend vacation saying, "why do you always get weekend offs?" I ignored the text and posted a video on SnapChat of a indie/alternative rock concert I went to. A few weeks later when his PTO got approved, he did the same thing I did, posting a video about going to a alternative rock concert.
Could you do a video about coworkers who leave the company claiming a toxic environment yet they participated in some of the things and through an entire team under the bus when they were actually the toxic one?
I had only been at that job about a year I don’t know if this coworker was jealous of me one day I made a flat out mistake please it was not a poor choice there’s a big difference.This coworker criticize me openly mocked me and talked about me right in front of the doctor I was in shock oh my God the immaturity that’s OK. It made me learn better coping skills at work to be a better person for myself and respond to idiots and not react difficult people are master teachers in disguise. I saw this terrible person as an opportunity for me to grow. I for gave the person but let’s not get it twisted forgiveness does not mean I forgot and forgiving does not mean I put myself back in harms way I’m glad this person revealed who they really are.I am very professional I have to communicate with this person because we work together I am a respectful mature senior I take pride in that. People may knock me off course and make me sad and I don’t want to come to work for about two seconds and then I say God what am I to learn from this how can I grow and be better than God leads me to awesome videos just like this! Thank you 🙏🏾
So i have this new job and i have this coworker that is unlike any I have come across before. She right away seemed to give off the vibe that this is her territory and I had to rise to her level to be “good” at my job. She is not my boss and she has been w the company less than a year. I am pretty sure I earn more money than she does but not by much so it shouldnt matter. It a mental health facility and the staff do not gossip so she shows her dominance by other means, like pointing out every short coming like how I bought too much creamer for the clients. She was also wrong yesterday when she tried to tell me, different role than her role, how to make a decision for my job role and she was overruled by the boss who said exactly what I had just said. Today she kept trying to defrost this meat for a meal by turning the faucet on and it was driving me crazy because I dont waste water. I turned it off twice before i was like, “wtf is she doing?” I finally said that it was more than 4 hours before dinner and for food sanitation, i wasnt ready to defrost something that was basically already cooked. She backed off. She also keeps saying “thank you” for totally random things and giving me “but you are doing a good job” after saying something bossy or critical. Its really strange behavior. Last week i thought she could be intimidated by me because a lot of people say they at first meeting think i am intimidating and she look anxious when she talks to me at times. Is this a jealous coworker or just a control freak? I am trying to see if she behaves the same or differently around others but it appears to be just me, the new kid on the block. Who engages in power struggles like a water faucet? I know I dont have time for that shit. I also told her, “you dont need to thank me” after she said thank you for zero reason, like i was doing my job and it had nothing to do with her. She turned around and said, “welllll…. (Pause) I am going to anyway” i have asserted myself so there is nothing else to do except let her try and irritate me. Do you think when i keep ignoring it, she will stop? What is she trying to do here? I dont understand the benefit to her behavior
I remember a coworker who said to me, yes yes I've heard all about you've got degrees in xyz. Bear in mind I never spoke about my qualifications with this person but my mentor told the whole team about my experience. My work also speaks for itself and I was poached from a different organisation. Jealous colleagues are just insecure people.
I deal with a guy who always try to one up me , compete, undermine, and try to make slick comments to get laughs, he wants to be the center of attention , and is jealous of me because people from corporate all the way through the whole plant , even our customers know who i am, and it annoys him, and im constantly complimented on my work… boo yah!!!!!
I have a coworker who keeps asking me what I was hired for. I have a newly created position so the first time I figured she was honestly curious. But this is the third time and it's only been 2 months. I get an icky vibe from her and she gossips all the time. Can someone help me figure out what she's trying to do?
@@arielrose6361 always show up early to work, work extra hard, befriend your boss and be successful. It makes them hate you even more. Peoples hate for you is none of your business. Just thrive for success and the great things in life!! 👍🏻stay strong
1) what’s worse is when your director encourages drama by talking shit about a group or someone, during an official meeting. Then they try to see who takes the bait. 2) the copycat is so real. When they first join, they act like a know it all, or don’t listen to how things are done here. Over time, they start to see how you have excelled and copy how you are more professional. Ugh, just sucks that no one got the chance to see how toxic they were. 3) undermining goes so close to gossip. When they notice your boss doesn’t like you, they join in on the gossip about you, because both the boss and toxic coworker bond that way. 4) always make sure they give that useless, unconstructive criticism in front of other people. 5) sometimes we should be humble and admit what we need to improve on because everyone still has something to learn. So in all, it’s up to you to take it as useful feedback, or “stfu with your shady comment, toxic coworker.”
OMG.. you just discribed my co-worker! She seriously did ALL this to me! I joined this company 4 months ago.. she was here for a year already. It's a new team and she was alone before.. there was no data nor information absolutely nothing to work with! So I built the team from the ground up.. so now we grew and there are now 4 members in this team... After she did all you mentioned in this video it has now been decided to transfer her to another team.. if she f's up there she'll be fired.. she still has one week on this team but we haven't had contact for a long time so think she'll keep a low profile now ☺️
I sometimes get a little jealous for a promotion but I've never let get to me or use to harm. Instead I say to myself he or she probably work hard for it the new promotion and i can do it.
Love your videos, I’m kind of person I don’t give a dam to any negative hints but I wasn’t focusing they feel jealous people! Thanks a lot For this video
We can't control other people's feelings. We can give validation when merited, but their feelings are so often just a projection of how they feel about themselves.
Don’t be so entitled to think you know everything their are people who aren’t always direct and don’t say what they mean especially when it’s personal and hard to open up and then their are people who make up fake emotions.
I might be considered a jealous coworker. Typically, I’m not. But, sometimes, bosses set the whole thing up and just watch you or the whole thing crash and burn, then blame you. In my situation, my boss has hired someone, with less experience and skill, who is now getting almost of the work and who my boss wants my butt cheeks open, so I can transfer information, under the guise of us being a “team”. It is the classic scenario of actually training your replacement. Shame as, my boss would like for at least me to think we’re BFFs, when she’s really just an indifferent dummy, with myopic goals, probably to just have more people under her, while there’s not enough work for 2 people and there wasn’t since before this person’s hire anyway. I think she’s slyly put me on notice, however, to expect much more of the same, because she intends to hire many more people which, unless the company has some plans I don’t know about, while they have mass layoffs, will turn our group into a pasture of grazing cows, doing absolutely nothing, under her brilliant guidance. I don’t even entirely take it personally as, such an environment will cause all these new hirees to snipe at each other, which will be horribly toxic. But, this boss has been known to obliviously hire toxic people, then act like she doesn’t know what’s going on and, no, she didn’t hire me. But some wish she’d leave.
In my experience you’re only shooting yourself in the foot by being jealous of someone that is smarter and more experienced than yourself. I admire people that have more skill/ experience/ knowledge than myself ( because don’t we all want to learn and do better ?) and I have learned so much from these people . I’ve also learned so much from jealous / gossipy / bitter bullies and poor managers because as you progress in your career and take on roles with greater responsibilities where you might be managing others, your bad experiences come in handy - because they teach you how never to treat others . Always pass forward the good advice you leaned from positive mentors and go out of your way never to treat others in ways you didn’t like to be on the receiving end of . Workplaces that foster learning and career progression are always something I look for . A manager that is rooting for you to succeed and progress is priceless vs one that wants to keep you in your place so they don’t have to worry about having to replace you . Just my thoughts anyway 😆🤞
Gossip has a terrible negative connotation. What if coworkers are gossiping about a terrible coworker who is in fact lazy, incompetent, stupid, and not a good person? How is that bad gossip if it is in fact all true.
Jennifer, if possible please consider also uploading video onto Rumble. It’s a fast growing platform to share your valuable content with even more people. Personally I find I’m on it more and more lately. Would be interested in your feedback. Thank you and still loving your input on important real world issues.
I'm currently going this right now. I oversee a program for a pilot project that I created and have contracted employees consistently undermining my decisions, ideas and overall authority. They dismiss the opportunity to come to me with concerns and go directly to my manager who inturn reprimands me. I've never experienced this kind of blatant disrespect and disregard from another and work has become highly toxic and unsafe. It sucks even more when your leadership sees this and chooses not to advocate for you and put a stop to it.
RU-vid reading my mind and recommending this after this same thing has been bothering me today. Deciding not to do anything about it and hope they see it for themselves.
nobody sees someone else as more intelligent than themselves, they more often than not see the other as pedantic, too concerned with the details, or in a different sphere of influence i would hazard to guess most people see their peers as one of the above. mentors and upperclassmen may actually get some credit. but i dont think anyone, as an individual, sees their "competitors" as more competent 😅🤔
I'm on my third week on a new job and I'm dealing with what seems like a jealous coworker. I think this because she will be smily, happy and joking with someone but the moment I ask a question, say good morning or thank you, I get stone cold b1t@h face. It started with a nice looking young man coming to help me with some boxes. From that momemt on she acts like any interaction with me is annoying her. Worst part is she has to train me for the department. I'm affraid she's going to try to sabotage me. I'm not even sure what to do to keep myself secure. All this because that young man helped me and says, "hello" when he has to come to my work area.
Your videos are awesome, and I really really appreciate them, but I'm not sure that protecting your vibe, and ignoring what's going on is going to be enough. For example, I just got a new job, and my manager is so terrified of me, that she is encouraging the whole department to be nasty and insubordinate. I can rise above that, but she is bad-mouthing me to all of her fellow managers. I have a lot more experience and many more qualifications than she does. The upper managers don't see the work that I do, and she's not telling them the truth. Is there anything else that can be done? I don't want to turn into the complainer, but if my manager is literally trying to sabotage my job what the hell can I do?
I recommend countering her negative words by letting your professionalism and work speak for itself. Establish relationships with the people she’s badmouthing you to-particularly the bosses. Don’t force it but start with friendly conversations that are always POSITIVE and PROFESSIONAL. In comparison, she’ll look jealous and small. When speaking with them, casually share the work you’re doing and projects you’ve completed. Collaborate with the colleagues she’s trying to turn against you. While working on the project, be kind, smart, friendly and PROFESSIONAL. Whatever you do, do NOT talk badly about her or try to fight fire with fire. You will come out smelling like a rose if you do this. She will look like a gossipy, insecure shrew. Be strategic in building alliances with the people she’s trying to turn against you. I promise this is your best course of action and will work wonders for you.
@@lumedeon8471 Thank you so... so much for your response! It came just in time too. I will very much be taking this to heart. I can't thank you enough... Best of luck in everything❤🌈🎈...
@@crystalcole888 Thank you! This worked wonders for me! Always be the positive person-complimenting others on their work and contributions. Compliment others loudly and in front of others (especially the bosses). That shows that you’re secure, positive and someone others will want to be around and work with! After all, everybody likes praise for their work and know that you will give it freely. How do you think she will look in comparison?
@@UnrealTournament420 dude, your mother's career path isn't for everyone. I think I'll continue to excel in my profession, and deal with the bitter people who are unable to excel.
I told you one thing Delete their number don't receive call from them.. If they are from client side don't involve as much as after if you are not working with them.. Because this situation is not good for future.. Left them and go for your bright future will waiting..
I've started a month ago to work in a hotel, im a quite person and focus on my stuff, don't seek for attention at work, im there to make money to reach my goals with it, in my personal life, soooo somehow my boss likes me, he gives me a task and i solve it without questioning it or asking to many questions, my co-workers noticed it that he likes me, now they put obstacles in my way or try to use the hierarchy card, to give me the feeling that they are above me, but i don't react or play their game, could it be that their behavior is a signal, that they want to get rid of me? 😅
I have a new co-worker who tells me what to do and when to do it. I'm a senior but I try no to complain but she tries to make me look bad by telling my manager negative things like who is doing this and why hasn't it been done. I hate her.
