AITA For Wanting To Divorce My Husband Because He Wants A Son? +UPDATES 

Imagine being pissed off and your sperm picked the gender! And to hit his wife so low… horrible

her mother and mil: "at least he wont mistreat them" ?? the expectations are so low. even the father loving his children is not a given

Hubby broke a table in a rage when he found out the triplets were girls. He shoved OP's brother when he tried to calm him down. He screamed for a bit outside. Then the following days he gave OP angry silent treatment. Any time he broke his silence was to verbally assault her & he spit on her. He would only get increasingly more abusive and violent if she stayed.

So, as a christian, there is the quote from Psalms that says children are not only a blessing, but a reward from the Lord. OP was blessed with hee babies and her husband chose resentment and anger. She did right by leaving a man who cannot cherish his own kids, and even more a man who verbally assaulted her, broke a table, spat on her, verbally abused her and then, literally admited to plan on child neglect. Thank God her community is strong and helped her out ❤

Leave that man right now........ Bro I'm actually happy that it's illegal to find out the gender in some countries because this can really affect people.

Dude is blaming her for 3 girls when when he's the only one who can provide the Y chromosome to make a boy. I mean, of course, they can't choose what chromosome they give the babies, but if someone had to take blame for all girls, it would be him

Bro.....does he not know how pregnancy works? Its 50/50 for the gender. There is no "oh you'll have a son or daughter next kid you have" its a "wait and see". You cant be picky about the baby's gender because thats just that. If you hate it so much then leave and find someone who might give you a son, dont b^^^^h about it and blame the mother who is just as hurt as you

As the daughter of an amazing girl dad who almost got into a fight with someone who insinuated that me and my sisters were mistakes, THIS IS ABSOLUTELY NOT NORMAL AND YOU NEED TO RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN. That man is a trashy misogynist and you will do right by your girls to take them out of the situation. He’s so stupid that he doesn’t even realize that men determine the sex of the babies, and miscarriages/stillbirths are not the mothers fault. I’m so happy that she has the support of her brother and his family. Also such a supportive church group! So many churches treat divorce like a terrible sin and blame women for not being good enough. I’m so glad that’s not the case with her.

Relatable. My father wanted a son. Didn't get one. He got my older sister and us. Quadruplets. All girls. My mother was a sahm when I was younger before she eventually left him and got split costudy. Still. He is a real piece of work. I'm personally haven't seen him for 4 years. He only texted for my bf and Lil new years but I never replied. Blocked him a couple months ago.

When she said when her brother came out. I thought she meant out of the womb. Not out of the closet.

No she should definitely leave. I’d be so scared he’d mistreat those girls because they aren’t boys, and it can cause a lot of trauma (Ik from experience of having a dad who always preferred having boys.) I’d be scared he’d abuse the mom and children (physically and/or emotionally and mentally. Edit: bless her community (church and brother) they are amazing

I genuinely do not understand people who try for kids then are distraught they arent the sex they wanted. Its a 50/50. You're gambling an entire future persons life and your own on a 50% chance you won't want it. At minimum 18 years child support on a 50% chance is crazy. Hoping for a boy or girl is perfectly normal, but if you cant cope with the fact its either, dont have kids. I genuinely think a lot of people dont value the opposite sex is as the same species or have just never had friends of the opposite sex to be so fixated on having a mini-me, as opposed to creating an entirely new person that could be anyone or anything.

My husband wanted a boy, we had a girl, while pregnant l could tell he was disappointed, but he never said anything. But the second our daughter was born that was it he was in love!!

Men determine the sex of the baby. A stillborn could happen to anyone. It could be likely his genetics that caused it. I’ve lost 10 pregnancies, we have 2 daughters. All we wanted was a healthy happy baby! Our girls are 14&10. I would divorce him if he did that!

Some of these comments are wild. "He'll maybe grow to love them." Tf? You're hinging the safety and well-being of CHILDREN on a "maybe"?! Hell no, absolutely not.

I think my heart just broke and repaired itself in the 8 min of this story. Best wishes and God bless the young lady and her 3 little ones.

If you're so deadset on one gender of baby that you will literally neglect them if they end up being the opposite gender, you are not ready to be having children. I'd love a daughter in the future so I can have a girl so she can grow up doing stuff with me, like what I did with my mom. But regardless of what I have, they're all my babies and I'm going to be overjoyed to have them. If I have boys and they want to be included in what I'm doing? Absolutely, join in babe.

Has he learned one thing from biology? It’s him who decides the babies’ gender not her 💀

that brother and BIL are amazing. i have no doubt that her kids will live a happy life with their mother, uncles and cousin

As a man, we don’t claim that one. Hope she leaves him.

The component that men supply decides the sex of a baby. I can't be the only person who knows that. Divorce him and let him go demand boys from some other woman. You will be fine. Good on you for knowing that would be a horrible environment to raise any children. That would be hell for girls, and horrible misinformation for sons.

I understand the trauma of his lose, but what he said (the worse thing under that circunstance) is really hard to forgive, even worse to expect love afterwards. Hope he takes the offer of therapy to deal with his own pain (Kinda sad, cuz now he'll have to do it on his own) and maybe someday become a good parental figure. I agree with the divorce part, the girls will need a parental, present masculine figure. Had she stayed, there wouldnt be certainty of that happening. When it comes to your children wellbeing, u go after the best option, u dont play "maybe he'll change".

Big W brother

Im just glad ur village came throu and helped when everything happened

You have grounds enough for divorce simply because he's a controlling misogynist. My father wanted a son and was so disgusted I was born female. He never named me and told me I was a stupid, worthless girl my entire life. Spare your daughters that kind of derision.

Take a shot every time you hear "brother and brother in law"

The second part starts around 0:58

He needs therapy for being like that lol

Rare church W

You know you done fucked up when not only both the women’s and men’s Bible study groups kind of hate you, but even the pastor isn’t on your side 😂

Hope she exposes his attitude to his church

TF...? Yeah. It's over. Best to you, sister. And it's not 'just because he wants a son'. It's all his other behavior. Run!

Its literally his sperm that determines the sex of a child. So its fault and make known to him.

How rich is her brother????

Plot twist one of the babies is actually a. Boy

Girl, you better run right now.

Good ass brother and bil

Good for her cuz it sounded like he was gonna hit you

My dad had me, a girl (im trans but i was born a girl) and he was overjoyed and still is, he's the kindest ever. Divorce his ass

OP needs to find a new husband that is infertile..maybe a cancer survivor.

Think she should have had this plan as a back up and waited till she had her kids before making the decision. My friend was in the same boat but when she had her daughter the husband and in law changed they love that girl more than anything know.

Mother was right to treat your brother that way, also your brother is unmarried

People often forget that mother is not the only one who go through the pain caused by stillbirth, Did OP cared about his mental health after she was recovered from hers? From stoy it look like husband is the one who take care of her and pulled her out of her dark place but what about him?

Every body is an asshole. The husband for obvious reasons but the wife because her husband is clearly really not ok after their son died. He didn't get through it and as his wife it's her dame responsibility to help him get through it, fuck it's our responsibility as humans to help one another when in need so for someone that is close to us it goes double. Everyone in this dame situtaion is an asshole, the guy needs help because he is not okey after his son died, and that woman is not ready to be anybodys wife or mother because to show such neglect for your own husbands suffering is just plain evil. Like straight up disgusting type of evil. Every body needs help. Sorry for my bad english not my first language and have a good day.

I call BS that has never happened

There's no excuse for the things he said and did, but divorcing him is a bit of a rash decision. He is obviously in a state of grief for his son and he probably realized at the baby shower that he'd never have the son he wanted. He took out his grief and frustration on the wrong person, absolutely, but what he needs is both therapy for his grief and marriage counseling.

If the boot was on the other foot , she'd keep having babies until She got the girl/boy child She wanted Hubby lost His son AS WELL, He was Strong , when OP was suicidal, No mention of Hubbies brothers? is he the last of his line/name? Sons ARE culturally More Important for legacy, " a Man without Sons , is a Man without a future"

Idk I mean I can understand both side He wants a son to carry his name which usually happens with men so I can understand the frustration of learn his has three kids at the same age and they all turn out to be girls so it make sense there but is still a over reaction I understand why she would want to divorce but’s its not like he said he won’t do anything he said he’d give them food and shelter he’d probably love them still just not right away probably

Nothing could have prepared me for what that jerk screamed at the baby shower. That’s unbelievable. That’s horrific.