Just made it 24 hours without a beer for the first time in 10 years. I know it's a poison and nothing more. Tired of killing myself slowly and it's time to start a new chapter in my life.
I've actively been trying to stop for almost 10 years now. Im a veteran, so I've been in and out of programs inpatient and out ever since 2015. Im disabled and have way too much time on my hand and keep finding myself at the liquor store. Idk wtf to do. AA SUCKS ASS, but i still go
Thanks Leon! This was really somthing to think about, a kind of revelation, esp. the part of avoiding cheap dopamin sources, and replacing them with the healty ones. The cheap electronic screen dopamin looks so innocent, and is so easy to find excuses for it. Thanks for the advice and your life saving videos! (That's a fact!) The illustration with science and the mice clip hit the nail right on. First priciples, boiling it down to the very core components, and making it easy and daylight clear to understand. I still need to take apart the old thought patterns sometimes, and avoid to fall back into their trap. I refuse to be like these mice!
Actually I think that people expected way too much of me. I feel that I have been overestimated, and the very only periods of me being free of ethanol abuse, were the ones I confessed to myself that I am not a smart guy. Being tall and having a serious deep baritone makes everyone around you think that your height matches your IQ. Im quite stupid and Im tired of pretending that I'm not. I need some time to digest complex ideas. That's not a sin I need to escape from.
