Funny how you guys always preach that side chicks don’t owe wives any loyalty because they didn’t make any vows but when tables have turned y’all turnaround and say wives owe you and your kids the world? Please be consistent
Moral of the story…condomise. Leave married men alone, cause they will always choose themselves and their wives. Heal, and healing requires you to take accountability for your actions in a situation that may have caused you pain.
Amanda bekathi ukhipha uFish emanzini and it backfired. The fact that a little birdy told her he was married and she chose to shrug it off as just a rumour says it all.
Yhooo one thing i can say is that immediately you make a baby with a married man just be ready to raise that child alone and don’t expect the wife to pull through she owes you nothing.The saddest part is that the person that suffers the most in all this is the poor child.
They blame the wife of their wrong doing. Husband and her behind the wife back and expected her to take huge responsibility for their actions the nerve. Ka earth shame
That man made a decision for his marriage without consulting his wife. Amanda became a willing participant in helping that man to hurt his wife! Obviously he lied about his circumstances to lay with Amanda. Amanda having unresolved emotional issues and traumas, fell for the lies. Now she has to live with the consequences. It is absurd to expect this man's wife to partake in something she was NEVER consulted about or given the option of whether she wants it or not. A selfish, inconsiderare choice!!!! That wife owes you NOTHING. Go to court and sue that man for child support. We don't get to hurt people and decide how they should respond or treat us. Go for therapy, work on yourself and teach your girls how to love themselves and avoid the same pitfalls. Children suffer for the sins of their parents. Period.
Dear Amanda, I wonder what your narrative would have been had the married man ended up staying with you after he left his wife, home and kids and stayed with you and your newborn for seven months. You sound so defeated by your own efforts of trying but failing to keep this married man to yourself that you are pouring unnecessary heat, hate and resentment on a woman who did absolutely nothing wrong to you. How does she owe you a co-parenting agreement? You are the one who owes your children a present parent. A real mbokodo as you called his wife at one point in your answers. The sad truth I do not hear you accepting is that You helped tear a family apart. You helped bring down another woman down. You helped confuse innocent kids. Own up, Amanda, Amen.
I love Mandy but she doesn’t seem to take accountability especially with the second pregnancy. You ‘knew’ this man was married but went with the flow, got pregnant and expect the wife to be civil with you while you aren’t even regretful of your actions. That’s so unfair but she’s doing great as a mom shame, we can’t take that away from her.
@@ShazyNobuhledeep down she knew the guy was married. She got herself pregnant hoping the guy would leave his family. They always lie and at they did not know the guy was married. Hello its year 2024, we won’t fall for that scam
@@nolundi.dzanibe_seale It's her wanting a sense of belonging from the households she is a side chick in. "The wife can leave her kids with her to run errands, they can take the kids to the same school to get a discount etc". She's delusional to think a wife cheated on will want to build a relationship with a side chick. Happens, but it's out of the ordinary.
There is always 2 sides of the story, I just wanna hear what the wife says and the husband. Something happened between her and the husband for him to hate her this much
Going with the flow. And not ask proper questions like where do you stay. Not going to the place where your boyfriend who you have unprotected sex stays. Things we bring to our selves
If you’re gonna give you body to a man, unprotected. It’s the LEAST you could do to vet him and ask the right questions. You don’t just “hear a rumour” that serious and just laugh it off…we are not children
It is hard to believe when you have never been through it, but it happens. I met and fell deep in love with a guy I worked with. He spent every waking moment with me. He slept over almost every night, we travelled together, had lunch together, shopped, everything. We were intentional, making a baby, at least I thought so. And then I fell pregnant. Suddenly, a bunch of women came out of the woodworks, including a fiancé and an in-service training kid in our unit. His friend came and told me everything. I have never hated myself like I did at that point. Everything I stood for was in total opposition to the situation I found myself in. Five months into the pregnancy, I was ready to move on without him, but I lost the baby. For the longest time, I could not talk about it with anyone, until just recently. MEN!
@@sibongisenikondleka196 you guys and these weird rules though. I had slept over many times. When an adult male asks to be your boyfriend, he intends to be yours. Sleeping arrangements could be of any sort.
😂😂This is exactly what I thought.. I was subscribed to her Chanel the way she speaks about the 2bd baby daddy.... She still loves the guy and her going through the church to find this guy sounds like she was on a path of destroying that marriage... Didn't she know this guy's friends or something?
Definitely, she had hope that the wife will divorce. How do u want to do cooperanting with someone and then move in with the man afterwards. At least she is honest to say she would still want to take him back
@@bellasetshedi1351 you can never co parent with someone you secretly still want to be in a relationship with, there will be no boundaries and lines will be often crossed which will make the situation even more messy
I will always say this, Yekelani amadoda abantu, ladies break people's marriages and get pregnant for married men, when they choose their wives and families over you, you get angry and want people to feel sorry for you? Njani. We are adults, every decision has its consequences. Your intentions failed and now there's a child involved you want the wife to be understanding and accept the child? Haibo kahleni bo. Explain to your child the reason they are fatherless is because you decided to sleep with a married man and he rejected you simple.
LoL, a man will deny his wife in a second. Mine said I was his baby mama. As women we must pray and ask the lord to show us when we meet a man. This is the only advise I can give.
@@zeesays726i just dont understand why women get pregnant to married men and expect that the mqn will leave his wife and children. Nothing special about side chick or the side baby? Silly home wreckers
What i have learned from Amanda's situation is that...don't have kids period. Because men can switch up on you anytime. Live your best life, child-free and eat your money in peace.
parenthood is a personal choice, you cannot peg it on the other gender for you to be okay with it. There are even parents who switch up on themselves by refusing to be accountable for their choices. Parenting is a choice you must own and commit to and this is the hardest to do
The married-man situation demonstrates simply that she is not a good person. Even the first baby daddy may have been in a solid relationship with someone else; plainly, he was not in love with her. Sorry, no sympathy; she has earned what is happening in her life.
I mean it's understandable.....these men did not only hurt her but the child....one of the BD straight up told his own daughter that he doesn't want to parent her because he's focused on his other kids....I would be so angry as a mother
@@candy4087She does not listen well and she tries to bully these men into fatherhood. She doesn’t have a husband of her own. That’s where she’s failing.
She chose to be naive with the second baby dady. I mean you hear rumors, you don't investigate, if he's wearing a ring, the ring mark doesn't just disappear whenever he takes it off. Never been to his place? No man, this girl o re tsentsha skolo! She knew he was married, there's no way.😂
I'm 14 minutes into this video and all I want to say is, the sooner girl children are taught that men are not their friends, the better. Girl children need to grow up with a mindset that men are not nice people and that will help them to grow up, be successful and avoid a lot of traumas women go through in life. When they are much older and understand the world better then they can start looking out for the man they will spend the rest of their life with. Men are very decisive, they know what they want and they will never compromise themselves for a woman they don't love. So as women, if we want to be safe, we need to keep ourselves for at least the man that will prove to us through actions and consistently so that they want to be with us forever. Otherwise, if we don't unfortunately every man that comes will just be with us as a transaction, because they getting what they want which is sex, and once pregnancies come which is not part of the plan, especially when things were never discussed beforehand, then men will leave and we as women will be left to raise those kids. That's the HARD truth that every woman needs to know as soon as possible in their journey of life. If we want to look at this from the perspective of changing men, it will never happen. We as women need to protect ourselves!
Well said. Hence we need to EMPOWER the girl child. I am a victim of a narcisst giving me a child he didn't want, he just wanted to control me and destroy my dreams to literally make me a statistic. That time I am now determined to reduce the statistics of girls getting pregnant and being abused by men. Your wisdom screams that you understand this dynamic. We need to stop this nonsense as women
Mandy touched a bit on her dad, that he used to visit them and go. Was he emotionally unavailable? Is she subconsciously hooked to occassional love? They say a girl child's first love is her dad and for the longest time I was the chaser in relationships because I chased my father I put in the work for us to have a relationship. My sister sat me down and said can you please stop looking for projects and find yourself a good guy, all of your relationships are reflecting your childhood relationship with daddy. It was a lightbulb moment for me and i had to go back and deal with my traumas.
I'm am glad someone noted this. Her dad came to visit them. I'm not judging Amanda, but I feel the lack of a present dad in her childhood determined how she views relationships. Except the kids always suffer. I'll never date a married man cha.
I think we can all agree that,most people do not use protection. They just go raw and become suprised when there is pregnancy. The society must work hard on education people about this. The risk of sleeping with someone without even knowing his or her hiv status,STD's. Secondly, people must discuss if they want kids together before they can even have sex together. Guys protect yourselves eventually, kids suffer bcs of your behavior. Gi through medical exams,condomise and take a pill. It is not complicated. Talk abt this with your bf's and gf's,before sex.
Yoh Amanda took me on a rollercoaster of emotions and I was like I will unsubscribe but then I gave the podcast a chance. Listened to the end and she’s just a human being who needs grace. She was dribbled clearly and I am glad she’s in therapy and healing ❤ . Hope baby girl heals too ❤
I’m worried for Mandy’s state of mind, I can’t imagine facing so much disrespect and rejection from people you held so dear 😢 I hope she gets help Yoh 😢
The way chicks asumes they're the main characters and that life is being unfair with them when they were okay being a stone that life used to be unfair to the main woman is hilarious. Make your choices wisely and enjoy the consequences with the same smile. Funny enough,they expect the wife to be the flower girls coming to their rescue when karma takes its reign
@@keitumetsesithole and this comment is from a married woman who's husband sleeps around to make babies with single women? This episode was about absent fathers it's crazy what the comment section is full of. Two wrongs don't make a right, sleeping with married men is wrong, so is encouraging a husband, someone you claim to love not to be part of his child's life all because he hurt and betrayed you. What in the shitty marriages is going on here 🤔
you better choose the married man to trap woth pregnancies wisely...if you happen to come for my husband ...woman..there is no place for your bastered in my house.....we will wait for Gods judgement and see who will be burning. Halleluyaaah
I find it hard to believe that this lady didn’t know that the 2nd baby daddy was married especially if they worked together. Cos we know how much people at work talk. I find it hard that nobody at work knew that the guy is married and didn’t say anything to her🤔
I worked with men who are married but people don't know. Even at work they never talk. Because I was young and noisy and always on their cases about teaching me about the our field of work. So that's how I learnt about their marriages and reasons why they don't want people to know about😊
Lol how is it that you forgive your husband for cheating but not accept the fact that the baby is already there And you’re not the one who’s gonna do parent,it’s your man that you chose to forgive Because had the tables turned and your husband did not want your baby you were gonna not like it,clearly y’all are not mothers,the mortherly instinct to protect your child is real
And i understand also that if the man wanted to,he would take care of the child regardless of what the wife says so the blame is on the guy but the wife is also wrong
"Choosing yourself" would mean leaving the cheating husband , but should a woman decided to forgive and love her husband, she should forgive and love everything that comes with it. Let's face it , men can be kids sometimes , they need a little push from us. It's really selfish and vile to say another woman " you are gona be a single mom" but expect your kid to have a present father. Don't get me wrong , I'm not saying what Mandy and the husband did was right. But what's done is done all these people must just stop with the back and forths because now theres kids involved , kids who need happy and loving parents.
@@kgotatsothobejane6761 leave and go where? Married woman are not leaving their marriage especially if it has other benefits for themselves and children.
A man will almost never tolerate cheating in his spouse. He will never make friends with his wife’s lover or tolerate their love child. Despite my big age, it’s still astonishing to me that women are so often willing to tolerate this mess, or that a baby momma expects a wife to have dealings with and be a sister wife to her.
millennial mom knew he was married. Let's be honest guys...ai also why is the wife being blamed for how things turned out? Women get in relationships with married men and expect things to turn out rosey...come on!
It's so easy to find out if a person is married/cohabiting/in a stable relationship, only when u serious. Worse if there r rumours frm workplace. Ask urself why he dsnt take u 2 his place. If u do,definitely u'l c a hse with a woman's hand,only if u nt naive. Gal if ur hubby is gonna cheat with Bby Mama,whether u co-parent/not, he will if the Bby mama allows. So the wyf must just do what gives her peace. That hubby cheating will only b stopped by God & nt by co-parenting of a wyf with bby mama. When God says No, no1 will say Yes.
I love Amanda. She was naive and believed the lies she was being told and chose to ignore the TRUTH, but that’s how most of us are inlove 🤷🏽♂️. The wife is justified to not want anything to do with Mandy’s daughter but the man needs to come on board because this is his mess too.
@@anastasimankesemokgobu1724 It doesn't work the way , the wife does not have to be on board - its not her child , she wasn't involved in the making of the baby, it is not her responsibility. We need to understand that there are consequences to having kids with married men
The wife isn't justified hle. She's directing her anger at the wrong place. I can only imagine what goes on in that household once Milanis name is mentioned and it's not right for anyone to live like that more especially if she decided to continue life with his cheating husband.
@@kgotatsothobejane6761 She does not have to do a damn thing, it is not her baby. Amanda and the father need to take accountability for their actions and leave the wife out of it, Engani when they were sneaking around , they did not tell her. Its unfortunate but these are the consequences of having kids with married people .. Its a mess nje
One thing that I have learnt is, sex is not love. A man can be sexually attracted to you but not in love with you. It's important to always keep sex out of the way while getting to know each other
Women have kids with married men knowing full well that he’s married they don’t care a damn!! but ya your kid will care and she /he will call him and he will tell her shit 🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️
what intelligence and maturity? she didn't even learn from her first mistake that ,man don't give a fuck and that one should not have babies with them if they say they don't want a child? She can't even take responsibility for her lack of thinking, specially because she knew the man was married. Yall like condoning madness and cry when this stupid men do you bad......
To me this lady is equally cruel to her children,just like the babbling daddies. 1st baby daddy told her he doesn’t want a child and she went against that and her her and now the child is suffering the consequences. 2nd one,she should have learned from the past mistake but she overlooked the “rumour” that the guy was married and still got pregnant? That’s another cruelty to her and her poor child because she is also being rejected again. I commend you for standing up for your children and I hope you have learnt from your mistakes. I have learnt alot from this though.
I actually believe her,my husband got a side chic pregnant and he had earlier made lies about me to her until when she told him she was expecting..he abandoned her for weeks and the chic located me..i tried to leave him and he told me we must get wedded and i thought it was cool..now am here suffering with a 43year old cheat
Baby mamas have no place thinking that they can even ask to be one and co parent and except the wife to just be there merry and jovial, what? The child should have access to the father and the father must take responsibility but the audacity to expect anything from the wife is unacceptable and ludicrous. But she’s correct that the narrative of men being the prize gives them the audacity to act crazy then have the women fight amongst themselves, that’s foul.
The second baby daddy story is very messy. ☠️. As woman its high time that reality is accepted that making babies especially out of wedlock is high risk and should be avoided. Its like woman knowingly open themselves to man expecting a different outcome. 🤷🏽♀️
@@motherofcubs true I was married had kids in marriage 15 and 7 years. Divorced when children were 3 and 11 that's the last time they saw their father, he cheated and got married to the side chick and now the wife doesn't want him to be associated with me and the children🤣.... So am with you marriage or single doesn't guarantee nothing.
Such a hectic story...first baby daddy part is so heartbreaking....second one, she got dribbled but was also ignoring the "rumors" at work that he's married. It's easier to find out marital status of a person you work with than a total stranger....but shame he did her wrong still....honestly, I'm not a wife but I totally understand why second wife doesn't want to co-parent...it's such a complex story. Best wishes Millenial Mom❤all will work out
She definately knew he was married 😂. She ignored it on purpose and hoped for the best which is what sidechicks do and unfortunately the best never came. There’s no way you wouldn’t want to dig deeper after hearing that type of “rumor”
I also would like to se how she will handle the baby mama calling her and not going to maintainance court to get financial help. How she will handle drama of baby mama going through the church and her accepting the child and cooperanting with a baby mama who moved in with her husband after the drama.
I am a wife and have been a wife for 22 years. I would never co-parent with any woman and I would never allow any child to mix with my children if my husband was to stray and have kids outside. Also I would never remind him to pay for niks, I would not be party to a sin. Oh also I would not leave my husband. I doubt anybody falls pregnant for a married man not knowing so when you do, expect to suffer the consequences of that, period!!
Don't forget to sign out of community of property,wen she claims maintenance you will indirectly be liable,or u can change your matrimonial property regime but it can be expensive
Its sad what woman are normalising and accepting. Giving the man a lifetime visa to fuck around on us. After that we turn around and fight each over some "animal". What is it about man that makes even the most phenomenal empowered woman, go through moments of "brain fog". Dick is not that good😢. Be strong ladies, hopefully Jesus comes soon and puts us out of our misery.
Those in the comment section saying something is off what are they gonna do about it? 😂😂😂. On a serious note these are the people who silent women, thank you Amanda for this whether she knew or not this is her truth, the man can also come and speak his truth. I don't understand why people are suddenly detectives online if you follow Amanda's content you'll see what an exceptional mother she is to her two girls and that's the most important thing ❤.
My unpopular opinion is that if you forgive your husband for cheating after he comes back with a child then you should also accept the child. Leave if you don’t want anything to do with the ‘other’ child because chances are that he won’t stop impregnating other woman. You’ll go around resenting every woman out there and thinking they’re all trying to be you because of a man who refuses to respect you and your marriage. Otherwise, great conversation ladies🥰
Wife would rather hate the kid & side chick instead of realizing the husband brought them into this situation. Edit: And also the kid is a physical representation that their marriage is not authentic would like it to seem.
Yoh Mandy you're your Ancestors Wildest Dream!! Trust me you're not going through all these for nothing! Also you're so strong mama,i admire you for that. love and light 🕯️❤
How do you expect the wife to co-parent with you and then you admit you have feelings for her husband 😂😂😂 and then you mock her for thinking that you want her husband.
The wife did not have to react, she’s very well within her right to remain silent. Why must she react? Can she change the situation? No. That was weird to say that. How you talked about the wife was quite disrespectful considering that you were cheating with her husband .
I am sorry to say this. I thank Mandy does not want to own up. 1. First child. The guy said “I don’t want a child, do abortion. When a Man say I don’t “want” believe him. You are own your own. 2. I am failing to believe that she did not know that the guy was married. In this era? Girl🤔🤔🤔🤔
Lol have you met men???? If you’ve never been with a manipulator you’d think she’s lying. You can date a man for years and only find out in year 4 that he is married. Lena azanka la jola le di chief liar kea le bona 😂
You know why I am saying this Maidi😂. If you listen carefully, she said “she went through the 2nd baby daddy family via church. She said again, phela during the relationship and happy times we talk as partners”. So she figured that out, cos they talk not the married part? In 1 month of lockdown you never saw any fishy someone? That he’s married?? I refuse to believe her, every side’s excuse is “i didn’t know he was married’
I think he hates Mandy for keeping the child & thts why he wants nothing to do with the daughter. The detective in me would never allow me to not investigate a person I am interested in😂
I wish for her to get married and have a baby mama drama. She called the wife of the first baby daddy knowing very well that the man made it clear that he doesn't want the child, she should have went to maintainance if she wanted financial help. Worse y force a child into a family where u know that the father did not accept her, that's traumatizing ur child, exposing her to rejection. Second baby daddy she went through the church and caused all this drama, y not explain to her family that she had a child with a married man. Cause all this drama and expect the wife to accept the child and cooperanting. She took her back without seeing divorce papers. Even if it's seperation I would also want to see a divorce lawyer busy with the papers.
Women are NOT clueless about MEN, They just choose to be naive. .. Then get shocked cry a river and play the blame game. She made poor choices and it's affecting her children. Also the subject should never be about MEN. You are the SUBJECT, the staring, the heading the title the main character if you will . From the on set choose to see exactly what it is YOU did wrong. How could YOU have done things differently. Forgive YOURSELF. And use YOUR story to teach others. This (men this, men that) will never change. We have been told about men, we have been seeing similar situations about men, Yet we still choose to walk into the ditch with our eyes closed. Then point fingers? That's delusional
For Mandy to think wives should play family with baby mamas 😂 , leave the kids with her when going for shopping? Wives have nannies, that is why there is family planning
May we as women also remember that in the unfortunate event that the father is absent, spare the child from hearing about how you hate their father and stop name calling in-front of your children it is traumatising and hurtful. You are the parent that stayed but now you seem like you are burdened by your choice of staying.
True. Biological father denied me whilst my mom was pregnant. He actually said, mpa gaise ya gagwe. 34 years later. I'm here. I guess I was helped by the fact that My mom got married. So I've always had a father figure. I myself, I am happily married. I guess I told myself that, I will never allow my background to control the kind-of life I want to built for myself. His loss. He denied a diamond. Look at me now. Yeeeer..😊
This guy used you for staying with you whenever he had problems with his wife, he would come and stay with you. He was not paying rental, whenever he patched things with her, he would go back. So you were providing accommodation unknowingly.
Mandy is likable and an excellent storyteller ❤ Give those innocent, adorable creatures your unwavering devotion; nothing compares to a mother’s love. Mommy, please use wise judgment in your future relationship, as both instances were highly avoidable and predicted. After my childhood trauma of not knowing my father, I would have opted for terminating the pregnancy without any hesitation. Regarding a married person, I would know within seven days of hearing the rumours because there is a significant likelihood that you are being played; finding out someone's marital status is rather simple. Ladies let's normalize vetting the other gender; it's a rough world out there. I understand that there are some situations that we cannot escape but let us love ourselves and be careful.
A girl must just focus. If you want to become a Civil Engineer or a Quantity Savayor , or whatever you had planned to become through EDUCATION, what do you want inside men's short pans. Read your books man , nxa ! You cant be a WOMAN and a GIRL at the same time. A woman sleeps with a man, but a girl STUDIES. Know your place please, . Be on your lane and stick to it.
@@TheMillennialMom1 mandy can you give some thought into having a single moms day where we single moms can meet , have conversations and bring our children along for a fun day for them please
"we are more powerful together than fighting" - Amanda Ndlangisa 2023 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉💐💐💐💐💐💐💐. Very much true, women are the most powerful species created on this planet earth. They can be each other's worst nightmares or forces to be reckoned with. It's all a matter of choice, hence I agree with my dear Amanda 100000000000000000000%
She will NEVER hence I unsubscribed on her channel, I was looking for growth as a single mother myself but hayi it's always the baby daddies, the wives the depression... Kuningi
@@beeelephant7898you’re the 1st single mom that’s not being biased and looking at things the way they are not because you’re a single mother yourself and that love n light,stay strong and raise that baby the best way you can ,God will see you through it ❤
@@keitumetsesithole thank you for the kind words ❤️ It's always work in progress... It takes a lot of work to account, heal and work towards being a better mom and a positive person in general.
@TheMillenialMom1 now this is the convo!!!! This is the convo. I have no complaints. Like now I get you completely. Coz now you gave the entire picture. Love and light
It will help women to understand men parent according to how they feel about the woman. Also as women we are terrible at taking accountability for our actions. She is a husband snatcher regardless of how she puts it. The wife was never the baby mama . Women like these honestly , and then they come online for sympathy
Husband snatcher how when he come willingly? These men lie please. How do you as a woman find out your husband had a baby while married to you and you decide to further y’all’s relationship? 😂😂 hectic because he will do it again
@@leratom8471 the wife has her own problems yes but it’s not her we are discussing here. Atleast the wife is married to the man while she means nothing to him . She does not get that . She has no girl code or empathy for the other woman so she deserves none. Very nice nasty and passive aggressive when she said she feels sorry for the wife. No she does not and if she could she would switch with her in a heartbeat
@@madhere0990 I hear you but when are we going to have men take accountability of what they do to us as women ? How much of a clown show they put us in ? It hurts when you see a man parent his other kids while yours gets kicked to the curb
@@leratom8471 you still do not understand . Men and women are created differently . They have a business like mind devoid of emotions in decision making unlike women. As a woman it’s your job to ensure you are married To a man before you give him yourself and a child . If after marriage he cheats on you, that’s not your fault but again accountability comes in on how you decide to handle this after you find out. Let’s do our part as women to understand how different men are and move accordingly. Or we can choose to play victim like this lady here
With 2nd baby daddy I can see most people are crucifying Mandy, we've seen married men cheat before but this 1 moved out of his house. Obviously he told her he was done with his marriage, and mind you before he moved in he was already frequently sleeping in Mandy's house like a single man... How did we conclude its her fault? Come on guys. Alwandes dad yena may Karma locate him.
@@tovhitshikororo1281 they don't think, they are told. Can we stop putting side chicks under the same umbrella cause with this guy his situation is totally different.
Karma is not locating him anyway just because you sqid. God likes families qnd here your prostitute goes breaking marriages? I hope her children will experience this kind of pain. I hope both of her kids get married and then bothe the husbands have kids outside and the side chicks may they try to break qmandas kids mqrrigaes. Only then will she learn how painful and destroying it is.....
