Are they disrespectful, lax with words, sexual and ghost you easily...? 

- The Santi Newsletter: How to Have a Good Relationship with Japanese Men www.onedayjapan.com/nljb

I think it comes down to how strong you are as a person and your values. I've dated all of those guys here while in Japan, but it was fine because I learned how to value myself more. You gotta evaluate Japanese guys the same way you evaluate other guys from your home country as well. Saying "I love you" or being overly sexual too early? Say bye. Being disrespectful? Tell him to cut it out or leave. Ghosted you? Rest in peace but also till death do us part. High-value people don't do any of this shit. Don't give ANYTHING to ANYONE until they deserve it.

According to psychology, mostly women are unconsciously attracted to men who are similar to their fathers. That means if a father was toxic to his daughter there is a high possibility that when she grows up he will choose the man who will treat her the same way. So dear men, please love and treat you daughters as a princess so she won’t deal with assholes. Dear women, please, if you got stacked in toxic relationships just run,run and run. If you don’t respect yourself, nobody will.

I sometimes wish all languages had the different words for different types of love like, Greek does: Agape - sacrificial "God" love, Philia - friend love, Storge - familial love, Eros - sexual love, Philautia - self love, etc. It would clear up so much confusion i feel like. Its unfortunate that in many languages, only 1 word is used for such vastly different types of love.

This is so timely, 2 days ago J guy who happened to be on tinder message me. At first, we had a good conversation, and then out of nowhere, he asked me if is it okay for me to see his private part in person and I was like WTF, the audacity and bluntness of this person. Ladies, a simple take away from this situation - if you meet a guy who is simply impolite, rude, and sexually vexing you CUT THEM OFF IMMEDIATELY. This is not just about a J guy situation but it could be from other nationalities as well, remember respect is a two-way street, if they can't give it to you as you do, its time to go no buts and ifs and YES THEY GHOSTS EASILY and let them because he is giving you a HUGE FAVOR, please don't forget to thank him for doing so.

I think there are a couple of things that could be factors. Two words came up while you were talking about these issues, especially the example of your acquaintance at the end: enabling and boundaries. Your acquaintance was enabling the abusive behavior, but the abuser was still making the choice to do it. The other thing about the original questions and the acquaintance, they sound like they need to set better boundaries around how they let people treat them. I speak from experience here (and I am still learning), settling boundaries is the best way to advocate for yourself.

It is happening to me now actually. HAHAHA the Japanese guy I met online ghosted on me too! But I’m lucky I didn’t get too attached to him 😂

- 14:25 - I don't think that exposing the body or a body part is sexual by itself, but it can be sexualised (either by yourself or someone else). Example: A girl wears something that exposes her cleavage because of the warm or hot temperature that she's exposed to. The clothing piece has a functional meaning here. It's obvious that a guy/girl will stare at her cleavage cuz he's/she's into boobs.

I don't mean to be rude but I think the problem isn't with Japanese guys, it's with the lady who sent in the question. She should examine herself honestly to see if she's attracting the wrong guys. It's not a racial/social thing as in "why do Japanese guys do this". It's "why do I keep ending up with these types of guys".

"i dont bullshit around." hahaha, i couldnt agree less santi.

I've been binge watching your vids, you're very informative and straight up. 💯 I have a Japanese friend and he's actually cool though.

I am very lucky to meet and became friends with Japanese people in person. I love them, they were very polite, kind, gentleman and TRUE TO HIS WORD. That's all i can say 🥰 Meeting people online is kinda dangerous, so i suggest you to visit Japan and see the beauty of the people, the place, the food and the culture. Everything is a work of art 🥰 PS: I LOVE JAPAN ❤️

Every Japanese guy,...if Santi is included....just enjoy🤣🤣🤣imao

I’ve heard a lot from my Japanese female friends that Japanese guys are really frustrating. This is not an attack on Japanese guys personally but from what my friends have said they think they are emotionally distant and not straightforward and it’s really annoying. I said that I thought they were cool and they were so shocked. Hahaha There’s definitely an impression that Japanese guys don’t take any initiative with women which is frustrating so I’m always interested in hearing what guys say about it.

Hello santi i just want to ask you a question. my japanese boyfriend and I always going to date every weekend he always treat me on the date, eating outside going somewhere and after that i buy him some ice cream and sometimes i'm the one who pay in supermarket when we go to buy some groceries for dinner. Question#1 should i offer to him a split bill when we go on the date is it rude to ask a japanese guy a kind of thing? or should i insist to him treating outside? Question#2 I don't know well about japanese tradition since i'm in japan now and i'm turning 24 tomorrow i want to know more who's the one who treat meal when you have a birthday i'm just really curious about that haha because i don't know if should insist my japanese boyfriend on treating him a meal outside. but he told me just recently we go to eat outside and he's the one who pay. in philippines when you have a birthday your the one who treat a meal for your friends and family is it same to japan too? who's the one who treat? i hope you answer my comment as soon as you can santi san because i'm just thingking about that we're having a dinner tomorrow i hope you see my comment お願いします 😅 Question#3 I just noticed my japanese boyfriend just recently he's a little bit hentai or pervert when we are together not outside haha i've just see him through his action not in words haha i don't want to talk about that thing but i'm just curious about that because on our first met he don't talk too much and he's a bit shy at first but the day comes i just noticed he becomes pervert to me. is it normal to japanese guy being pervert to her girlfriend? thankyou santi san i hope you noticed my comment btw, i'm your new fan here i love your videos i currently watched your other videos and i'm really happy to hear your advice i'm interested in japanese culture that's why i watched your videos 🥰

Hi Santi! I’m happy watching your videos you are unique. Do you have a younger brother? Haha lol. I like your expression and honesty the way you show the real Japanese culture. Just hope to see you soon in Japan. Lol 😂

honestly speaking if this girl have some great qualities that a man would pursue then should be confident enough and be proud of herself. she does not deserve this kind of man. However if The man truly loves you then he will pursue you no matter what it takes, simple as that.

Hi Santi-san. I recently discovered your videos and I am still trying to work my way through them all. I know you say things as they are so I wondered if you could give me some advice. (I am trying to fit into normal Japanese culture, not stand out) (sorry if asking for fashion advice from a guy seems weird, but here goes anyway) Q: Can 30+ year old females wear shorts at all? like to a park? how about if they wear leggings or stockings underneath that? I know you said on a previous video no mini skirts; Is it bad even with stockings? Should it still be avoided? how about high waisted Plaid Pleated Mini Skirts? haha If it is bad, what is the shortest or most acceptable length someone over 30 can wear, while still being classy? Thanks for your honesty and helping foreigners adjust to Japanese culture better. Keep up the good work.

I didn't catch how she met these men, but it also has to do with the way the subscriber presents herself. Maybe wearing the wrong things, taking the wrong kind of pictures she posts. Because whether we like it or not presentation does matter and does send a message, yes even online! Certain things do attract certain people. So yeah Santi is right!

If men in Japan are so straightforward in their "demands" there should be no issue about low birth rate that I hear on news. But based on this video things are "complicated". 🙃 Hahaha.

I don’t think she has actually met any of these guys. She never refers to meeting in person, just chatting online and calling. This isn’t a Japanese guy thing, it’s a creepy guy on the internet thing. There are a lot of creeps on the internet from every country. If she’s not living in Japan, or working/studying with Japanese, then she doesn’t actually have any experience to make a comment like this. Just basing it on people online really narrows down the type of person you’re going to be encountering. Most Japanese aren’t going to be trying to meet foreigners online.

I think this kind of behaviouris typical for all men. Not just Japanese.

I dont even wear clothes that attract attention or try to be sexy, Japanese guys act normal with me until I say which country I'm from lol After I say where I'm from they automatically think I'm some kind of b****

Many Japanese men are quite emasculated. They let women run all over them. The few Japanese Alphas are business-running millionaires who are not available to the average woman.