I don't know how Graham does it, but he is the best interviewer out there today. Might be because he doesn't interrupt and doesn't need to hear his own voice like so many interviewers. Whatever the case is...well done once again.
Guess that's true. But I think it's not only that, - he also asks really good questions. Seems his research/prep for the interviews, as well as empathy and conduct are 11/10. :)
You should watch the rubin report then ru-vid.com He interview a lot of interesting people, including diplomats, scientist, economist whether conservative, from the left or liberal
I just commented damn near the samething on another arnold interview. Graham is an amazing host. Intelligent respectful and genuine. Always seems like he really wants to just sit back and hear what the guests have to say.
I followed the same path as Arnold. I grew up in France in a poor family. I was dreaming about America. My mother was housewife. Her job was to raise us. I gave her 50% of whatever money I earned. I never hated. She could buy things she needs for her. At the age of 13, I watched "Conan The Barbarian" in movie theater and became a big Arnold fan. He motivated me to do sports. Few years after, I got my computer science college degree. Education is free in France. Poor or rich kids have the same chance to succeed. With my college degrees, I was able to come to America. I never came back to France. I became a proud American citizen few years ago.
It really put into perspective of when he was poor and had a negative background growing up showed his hunger for working and success and that gave him huge motivation. On the flip side, wealthy or I guess middle class can grow up in a negative household but still have the essential things for living which doesn't create their drive for motivation as the motivation while being poor would be for these essential things for survival. Wealthy and depressed would mean they can sit on their asses all day and be miserable because they have that comfort opposed to a poor miserable person who is striving for better things to get them out of this pain. The wealthy person will be striving for materialistic things as the poor person will be striving for comfort.
Hahaha. French citizens paid for your education and you left the country that supported you. So you didn’t pay if forward for any of your country people. I hope we never have free college education here in the US. We would become a country of free loaders. Eventually you run out of other peoples money.
I had an uncle who was a lot like Arnold. He was obsessed with sports and learning, even at age 75 and he had an iron will. But he would have disagreed with Arnold in one thing: not everyone thrives under extreme pressure, there are those who would be broken if their parents were so harsh with them. So, my uncle was always positive, always applauding every achievement and encouraging his children, nieces and nephew to go even further and do even better.
Your uncle is right. That's why Arnold's brother died as a young man in a car crash while intoxicated. Two brothers, same childhood, very different outcomes.
100% agree and I love this! The only thing ill slightly disagree with is I don’t think Arnold was necessary advocating to put people under extreme negative pressure to succeed, but rather how he made it work for him. But, I 100% agree with you
I've grown up with a very similar father so I always enjoy listening to Arnold talk about his uprbinging. Love or hate the guy, his determination is second to none.
@@topflightstyle4141 no one is succesful in EVERY area at the same time but if you have the right mindset you can be succesful in ANY area. Look at Arnold, he became the best bodybuilder then he let that go and became the highest paid actor of his time, he stepped away from that a while and he became a very influential politician so yeah... He can be whatever he puts his mind to but it has to be your priority. When you become your number one priority, you can help others too
I too often get sick and tired of constant criticism from my Dad (he means well), it just gets to a point where anything you do is just not good enough. Kind of makes you question yourself on your abilities in life. Really takes a special person to use that as fuel and not look back. Great interview.
Being a strict parent is fine, but there is no excuse for being a shitty one by embarrassing your child, or trying to quench their dreams, aspirations and achievements. You can give compliments and still set a standard.
very true, my parents are quite similar to the way he describes his the "you could do better", and my dad would always say "tough" if I complained and was always finding something around the house that needed done. Arnold was probably raised in a similar home to a farm, plenty of chores and exercise since he was young. to this day me and my twin brother are very strong and both were at the top of bench press for our schools football team with over 500 kids per class
Arnold reminds me of my father in some ways growing up in a village really poor and then becoming successful after coming to the states..truly the American Dream
The negativity worked for Arnold and that's why see him in an interview. We dont see the millions of people who were also raised by abusive parents who dont make it big but become miserable adults instead.
Max Meier Don't you think it definitely helped that he had great athletic genetics anyway? Not everyone would have that. Yes he worked extremely hard but only one in a million could achieve his build through bodybuilding.
This is the core of so many TED Talks and life advice, the implication on the presenter's side or assumption on the audience's side that it works as a general guideline. Many success stories, when you cut right to the core factors, boil down to "I was lucky". One has to realize, and Schwarzenegger kinda conveyed that here, that when you have external factors pushing you, movement can become psychologically almost effortless. Life pushes you along or at least gives you a kick every now and then, and that's helpful guidance. There are much tougher challenges in many people's lives, and yes, they don't typically enter the popculture sphere unless success is reached. This can distort perception of the world. And while it can also encourage, that encouragement would still be based on such blissful ignorance which later likely leads to a kind of lack of empathy that is almost impossible to break through. Humankind's capacity for seeing the full extent of our suffering determins our capacity to make the world a nicer place, for that is what creates empathy.
The negativity worked for Arnold and that's why see him in an interview. We dont see the millions of people who were also raised by abusive parents who dont make it big but become miserable adults instead Most of us are never going to become movie stars or international sex symbols(not so much now, but Arnie was arguably one these-sex symbols, that is-in the 80s and into the 90s), no matter how hard we work, this is true. That said, Arnie's words here are interchangeable with much of the encouragement I've received regarding thinking of one's parents, even when trauma has been deliberately inflicted....Each of us is ultimately a mixed bag, neither completely positive or negative. For the sake of maintaining one's own sanity, it's prudent to cultivate a nuanced view of mommy and daddy, as AS seems to be conveying here. Papa Schwarz could be violent and cruel, yet also could display bouts of helpfulness. We can't change what happened in the past, but we do have immense power over our thoughts about these same events, and by extension whether or not we spend most of our adulthood miserable.
Alpha Male, what is that supposed to mean? If a person is born in a country, then they are not an immigrant to that country, regardless of where their ancestors were born. Example: A couple of Germans immigrate into the United States in 1981. In America, they give birth to a child. They call him John. John is not an immigrant to the United States no matter "how far back you look." He is a native-born citizen. A person's status is not determined by his/her ancestry.
Grew up poor in a country devastated by the war, his father was abusive, his brother died very early and despite all this Arnold became a legend. Respect!
Arnold is an awesome guy and using that negativity as a transormational force is a great idea and very helpful for me personally. But regarding some of your comments: Its 100 times better to have a great loving father than somebody negative always criticizing and never praising you. In the end, of course it can also be positive and strengthen your character, but there are some things in live you can happily forego.
Yep. Never forgive, but do forget as much as possible. Many say you have to forgive to move on...that's bullshit. Just deal with it, forget them, dont waste your time on them, respect yourself and what you'll take and move on.
Arnold.... Leaves his home. Migrates to foreign country. Becomes world's most iconic body builder. Learns English. Gains citizenship. Becomes a movie star despite thick accent. Marie's into U.S. royalty. Becomes Gov. Of California. Philanthropist..Etc..... Wow .... Wow..... Um.....WOW. Great man indeed.
Kevin Cook -compared to his many accomplishments who gives a fuck who he had as a side piece? That “maid” now lives a lavish life because of it. Arnold should be President! What have you done with your miserable existence?
I can vouch for being poor as a child being fuel for success, you either hate living like that and do everything in your power to get out or you let it beat you and you never get out.
Paul Harris extraordinary everything- motivation, intelligence, industriousness, talent, skill, etc. It takes a truly extraordinary person to do what Arnold did
1. Arnold Schwarzenegger is a name synonymous with the person who has burning desire, fire, whatever it takes attitude, going that extra mile to name a few and last but not the least SUCCESS..... 2. The way he answers host questions here, looking at his eyes, one can surely notice how he has gone through his worst days to earn his best days ...His eyes speaks and visualises the entire journey he had been through... 3. Perfect example of LEGENDARY MASTERPIECE...!!! 💐💐 HATS OFF !!! 💐💐
All the negativity from my own Czec father fueled my ambition to build a Real Estate Empire like Arnold from a young age. I'm astounded at the parallels. The fire behind my drive was to prove my father wrong - he claimed I would always fail. He died in one of my buildings living rent free for years.
Bad motivation though that will have resonated through your path. You likely won't be aware of how that caused damage in the background, out of sight. The whole sector of strife for great power is driven by such psychological pain, the perception of not being good enough. On the other hand, such a father can also sabotage one's natural potential and ambitions, so sometimes it might be necessary to prove oneself to others to get away from such prisons. Some might be able to to that. Others might be way too disgusted at that person to even enter such an energy dynamic.
His dad sounds exactly like mine... No wonder I pushed and pushed and pushed till I fulfilled his dream. But no matter what, I'll achieve my goals even if it means sacrificing my personal life. Period
Not so sure, if parents always mean well. Some are just jealous of their children's success or easy living and do what they can to diminish their achievements, dreams etc. Most children suffer from this emotional coldness - and I'm sure Arnold did also.
no, not so sure neither, unfortunately, it's just a childs justification for the parents, because you just can't realise, that your own parents want to harm you and don't love you a Bit. Arnold is a good guy. what he did is phenomenal. I love him.
@movingonandup773 this is the unfortunate reality Most mothers are jealous of their kids, and subtly and not-so subtly sabotage their kids' lives The sons or daughters who dont realize this until they're in their late 20s or early 30s are the most damaged, because now their youth is gone and they just realized they should have excommunicated their parents at 18. Oh well. My conclusion about those sorts of parents is that they dont love themselves. Before mating with someone, ask your partner if they love themselves and be absolutely sure they do and that you do BEFORE creating children together. Or you'll be envious and spiteful just like Our parents are/were
His father obviously had narcissistic personality disorder, same as my mother, nothing positive comes out of those kind of people, you just have to get away as he did
Arnold is a perfect example of not listening to people that tell you 'you can't do that'. - Moved to America - learnt the English language - Become the greatest bodybuilder of all time - Become one of the most famous actors of all time - Become a governor and married into the Kennedy family. All of this combined is basically impossible for a regular American to achieve, let alone an immigrant to achieve, and to the level of success he did it. A real inspiration.
Can totally comprehend the way he talks about his Father. I’m 42 & my Father has always been that way. He means well, but goes about it totally the wrong way. Still has my respect though...🤝
I read Arnold's book and it was actually very good. Arnold's brother was the favorite son but Arnold also had a great education, lots of discipline from teachers and his parents, tough work ethic, and a lot of friends who encouraged him in athletics, achievements, do the right thing, etc. Arnold even tells stories about how he was a screwup in the military, he kept on crashing his tank. Still, the Austrian's let him out of the military early to go achieve his goals. In short, Arnold had a lot of very good influences to help him along his way. The fact that his father was a strict disciplinarian and favored his brother just happened to help Arnold as he was already strong in so many areas he could just add it to his fire.
The old school is amazing. I fight a constant battle trying to remain super positive with my boy even though being negative is required when teaching a craft to a young person. Kids are sensitive now. And you never want to lose a student. I will always admire Arnold. Incredible work ethic
You're wrong Being negative doesn't help, it only creates animosity and bitterness (in any era) Be respectful, don't be negative Firm but fair, but never negative
I find these videos to be very helpful in my own life, as a writer and as a short-film maker. Arnold said in so many words, that things that you want to accomplish sometimes don't come easy and that they take hard work and in other videos he speaks of "put-downs from others" and the lack of support that you can sometimes receive in return for expressing dreams that you may have, dreams that may sound a bit out of the ordinary to the average person. He had many struggles to get where he is today but the ambition drove him to think outside of the box in order to reach the end result that he has. I see why he and Stallone are such good friends, even outside of filming. They are both still highly motivated individuals that certainly don't need the money but they share a drive that does not vanish with age.
The key of everything is in the last part. He got his bodybuilding discipline and work ethics from his father and that's something to be greateful. On the other hand, He's right that some encoraugement from time to time would have been nice.
God gives us what we need to fulfill our mission. Arnold didn't need the encouragement from his father and that's why he didn't receive any. Out of all the fathers I would have chosen, I would not have chosen mine. But he is the father that God wanted me to have.
The edge between becoming a highly successful person because of having a tough upbringing or having lifelong psychological problems is really small. A psychologist would say, it depends on how many self-confidence you built up as a kid. A really ridge walk.
Absolutely. There have to be factors in place that negate the abuse/negativity. I'd argue Arnolds escapism to bodybuilding gave him self confidence among his peers if nothing else plus he had mentorship there in the gym, other father figures to inspire him. The commonly pursued dream of replicating anothers success is always doomed, because the variables are so many it's simply never possible. Yet we get told over and over that you can do anything etc. which while a positive mantra is actually a steamy pile of shit mostly entirely dependent on life circumstance, ESPECIALLY as a child.
Agreed. But I can't help but question the ways that western society values success so much. Why is success so important to us? Why do we measure ourselves by our past achievements? Is it just a way we are trying to find the love and affirmation we didn't get as children?
His dad sounds so much like mine! Tough times and situations can forge character or lead to ruin, depending on how the person takes it. Arnold channelled all that negative energy into work he believed in, and just kept going...and winning. Truth be told, I still do not have a great relationship with my father today, but there are so many things I would not have achieved if he wasn't such a difficult and hostile person. However, I believe that I can build my own children up and encourage them to excel by being positive and supportive. I don't want my kids to strive to do well just to get away from me - I want them to fulfil their potential because it is the best way to live; and because they see me as a solid role model.
Whenever people lack something in their youth, it creates a hole that they will spend their entire life to fill however, it can never really be filled, so they need more
Wow, this interview ment a lot for me. My father is also like this, his parenting is cold, but his lifestyle is warm... and that taught me so much and prepared me for a cold world, my dad ads fuel to my fire and that makes me work harder
when i was 15 years old i asked my parents if i could go to work in summer because i wanted to earn some money with my effort and buy something without the need to ask them for money, they dissuaded me saying that i could ask them every time i needed something. you already got the point i guess, in all honesty, since then, i always fought all my life to get the motivation to do something seriously, and i am a pretty talented person, now i am convinced that my parents gave me a very wrong mindset, they did it for the good of course but they didn't realized it was completely wrong. having parents that teach you to earn your stuff is priceless, you can hate them at the very moment but only after you will understand the real value of this, and arnold story tells us blatantly, he has to be really thankful to his father and he knows well
His dad Gustave once got stuck in an exploding building during a battle, and ended spending 24 hours buried alive! That would mentally screw up anybody.
Many people grew up like Arnold in that era. It was post war and most houses did not have running water or electricity in those regions. Most people were living in poverty because the economy was in ruins. Many parents had been in the war so kids had military fathers. What’s unique about Arnold is that he had a plan from very early on. He wanted to become a professional body builder from a very early age and he had the drive and determination to do it. He’s an exceptional human being who found purpose and set his goals early on and stuck to them. He was not distracted or sidetracked by the things most kids and young men are. He had laser focus and became obsessed with success. He’s also very intelligent and has good genes.
My father tries to compete with me, not in a good healthy way, but he tries to "alpha up on me" when he feels he's losing his power. He is a great man, raised me well but he's shy and insecure and calls me crazy when I give him advice on social anxiety, removing emotional baggage that's holding him back and taking more risks in life, then he turns all passive aggressive on me trying to appear and feel better about himself. He once told me all I have is lifting weights, reading books. My confidence kept intact, cause I know what I'm capable of, but to someone who's still building themselves up, that's a big blow. It breaks my heart to know that my own father secretly hates and wants me to be inferior to him, rather than him taking my advice and working on himself to better his own life, not to throw garbage in someone else's.
Sorry to hear that. Being torn down as a child has an effect for a lifetime. I hope you are able to get to know Our only Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. He can heal you.
Admiration for his workout ...not his damn womanizing ...my dad was a real womanizer...I am nothing like him...I've been married for close to 38 yrs...not like him at all ...he divorced my mom because she didn't wanna be part of his lifestyle ..
Trust me there’s nothing quite like having a parent that’s a bit of a hard ass to (while sometimes still good and supportive) help light a fire under you to go about your own way and the memories can help keep said fire lit
Arnold is talking about his father with the hindsight that his bodybuilding career turned out to be successful, and it lead to bigger things for him. The truth is, his experience is a one in a million. Thousands of people have tried to do what he did and failed. His father was looking at the odds, and he saw what every parent would see, his kid was wasting a huge amount of time on something that would go nowhere. Arnold's dad probably was a jerk, but Arnold's view of him is distorted.
Sure Arnold got lucky, however he forged that himself with an undoubtably great physique that no one could deny. However, in those days there was fuck all money in bodybuilding really, BUT it was his passion, so any good father would encourage that. Bet his Dad was a jealous prick, kind to keep his son down and never want them to be better because they're too much of a threat to their ego.
Graham has to be the best and most underrated interviewer. He's respectful, never misleading and responds genuinely. The lack of views is shameful when compared to how popular yet terrible some interviewers are.
Different people need different treatment. You can create a plain loser by spoiling a child, but, on the other hand, you can also create a plain loser by being a total strict parent, holding back your child from developing properly. I will coach my children to be a better version of me. If they have better plans for their future, good for them. Arnold's father seemed to be teaching him to be an updated version of himself, a strict military man. The problem here is the anachronism, you may be trying to create a person that won't fit the society he is living in, for you are thinking as if the world was the same it was 30,40,50 years ago.
Just saw this video and WOW. I wish I could talk to Arnold. Had no idea and my father is the same way. Whether or not he meant well, he never approved of anything I've done and always belittled any dream or anything I had or wanted to do. Sadly unlike Arnold, it just kind of broke me. I wish I could've had the fire or passion or whatever to stand up and use that to achieve my goals.
My dad and Arnold's dad are so similar and I thank God I have a dad like that. My dad never bought me toys, but he showed me how to invest and save my money and was never over complimentary.
