As someone wo is completely blind, autistic and has CPTSD, I’ve been told, “you’re not blind. You’re typing.” I’ve also heard, “everyone has a little bit of childhood trauma.” I’ve even had people dismiss my CPTSD and blame my behaviors on my blindness or autism. Mainly, I get denied about my blindness more than my autism and CPTSD.
SAME. I’m almost totally blind (I am legally, I can’t drive, use a cane everywhere), AuADHDer who often gets accused of faking it because I’m using JAWS or VoiceOver. Also the, “You’re too high-functioning to be autistic”.
@@ALittleSnowFairySaga i’ve even heard people tell people, you don’t have complex PTSD. You would be crying if you had complex PTSD and you were talking about your triggers. You don’t act like you have complex PTSD.
@@thetickedoffpianoplayer4193 I don’t understand why people think that people are faking their blindness. I’ve also been told, but you don’t look blind.
@@siennaprice1351 Yeah. Like, I’ll believe people because I know I go through it too. I just want everyone to be able to get the services they might need.
I self diagnosed as Autistic and ADHD and went to get tested but they wouldn't diagnose the autism because of the "unless it can be explained by another diagnosis" BS, so they diagnosed CPTSD and social anxiety disorder instead.
Kids usually need either a lot, or VERY obvious autistic traits to be diagnosed, that’s why so many people don’t get diagnosed until adulthood. All kids get ‘overexcited’ at birthday parties, have ‘tantrums’ don’t like their food touching, won’t wear a coat, line all their teddies up in order of favourite on their bed. It’s not until adulthood that you realise it’s not being ‘overexcited’ or ‘having a tantrum’ it’s actually being incredibly overstimulated and arranging your things in a nice way helps you to keep track of your things and feel at peace. ‘You didn’t seem autistic as a kid’ - no, I did, you were just too busy calling me a spoiled brat and yelled at for having a tantrum to notice 🤷🏻♀️
@@harveyandabeni I for one never had meltdowns as a kid and I was unusually calm most of the time. My autism wasn’t really that obvious to everyone in my life.
Yup. I liked to organize books because I was a big reader, so I would organize my shelves, my parents' library and even do it AT the library lol. It would annoy me when I saw a book series being placed out of order a t the local library. It's stuff that just flies under the radar because it seems so innocuous.
I was born autistic in 1977 to an autistic mother born 1955 to an autistic mother born in 1920s. My mother and grandmother would be ASD LEVEL 2. I am the one who diagnosed all of us 2 years ago. Im 46 and I've always been here, my problems ignored.
@CATMOTH-ml5fy I believe this person is referring to part of the diagnostic criteria in the DSM-5, where they classify diagnosis by: - Level 1, "requires support" - Level 2, "requires substantial support" - Level 3, "requires very substantial support" This is I think meant to be based on support needs (at time of diagnosis), but it can be confusing, especially given outdated language about "high functioning" and "low functioning" autism.
I feel like people don’t want to call someone autistic because that would mean they’d feel like an asshole for treating you differently and hating that you’re not “instinctively normal like they are” They want to believe it’s you making yourself a “burden” to them on purpose instead of accepting that people can be different
@Thomas Henley "Softening" directness or bluntness is best achieved by acknowledging others have a reason for thinking the way they do, just like we do, even or especially when we don't agree with them. Being compassionate helps. However, this applies to both sides, so respect and dignity can and must be demanded. This is called "standing your own ground". Thanks for bringing this up and keep up the good work and lovely insights!
True. You can tell someone "I know you mean well, but....". I think neurotypical people need this kind of "softening". And to be fair, some neurotypicals actually do mean well!
I like socializing around my hobbies because they actually want to know I have to say and let me speak. Generally socializing, I can't process fast enough to be able to contribute and it's hard to figure out when I can speak. It's exhausting.
I am not _acting_ more autistic. I am being more authentic for the first time since it was beaten out of me at 9. Oh, I am actually lucky, though, everyone celebrated me being autistic, at first, until I was autistic with them and they were able to notice. Then all heck broke lose. I need help. And they think they are the victim.
My experience as an autistic adult: - "I think we're all on the spectrum" - "Yeah but we all do that" - "You need to stop labelling yourself" - "I think you've just got anxiety" - "my nephew is autistic but he has it worse than you" - "But you're so well spoken!" - "Omg you're autistic? I never would have known!" - "I think you're playing on it a bit too much" - "it's like you wanna have something wrong with you" - and the common one, talking to me as if I am a child as soon as they know I'm autistic 🤦🏻♀️
If someone says you don't look autistic, ask them what they think autistic looks like (other than the eye contact thing, or head banging, they seem to be the only ones everyone knows)
What I find the WORST is psychologists and psychiatrists who are against self-diagnosis, who put other mental condition labels on autists and drug them up for years (BPD, schizophrenia, etc..which can co-occur to, but that's not what I am talking about), and if you go to said psych professionals and say you are pretty sure you are, they DENY you the diagnosis (which cost you in some way either financially or with stress)...def. a GRRRR for me
I hear ya, was misdiagnosed bipolar from early 1980s to 2009. Getting a Correct diagnosis, getting off the Incorrect medication, and learning the Correct things I could do to cope with effects of autism, pretty much immediately solved several problems in life.
Yep. I’ve been “diagnosed” with BPD, bipolar 1 + 2, depression and all the things by professionals who don’t even know me. Always made things much worse lol
I find myself fortunate that though it’s not totally obvious that I am, I got my official diagnose at no cost to me and all I had to do was honestly say that I didn’t start speaking at all until I was 4 and barely spoke much until much later, and still have social difficulties. Also talked about being very sensitive like to light, taste, and smell.
Self-diagnosis is far far less accurate that a Psychologist. shitty one is still better than claiming you have something just because you exhibit the symptoms
My pastor didn't fake claim me, but he was confused how I could be autistic since I'm a big fan of tight bear hugs. I just had to explain the spectrum concept to him, and I think he got it, but I'm crud at reading people.
After watching your reaction video, it made me want to share with you the social side of being color blind and how its a little similar to being on the spectrum. Well obviously, its completely different in most ways but I will let you be the judge. People cannot tell that I'm color blind until some kind of social awkwardness happens because I don't understand some color cue. And the world is designed for color normative perceptions. Each time I have to decide if I will explain in these situation that I'm color blind because I know the "Questions" and possible "disbelief" will come unless this person has grown up with someone who is also color blind. The follow up responses are generally and I quote " You don't look color blind" "are you pulling my leg" "no you can't be color blind" and I've heard "only men can be color blind" and its almost always followed with a string of what color is this questions. If i get the color right, they say "You're not color blind, you're lying" and if i get them wrong, they say "You're lying" or if they do believe me, they think I only see in black and white and or "you are the first color blind person I've ever met" and believe me when I say this only scratches the surface. I could go into how it affects people who are color blind but don't know it, only find out later in life, schools, careers and electronics. and how it does affect people but isn't seen as a real disability and isn't worth any kind of meaningful accommodations. I have to accommodate for myself in most situations and I think it gives me the perspective that how I perceive the world isn't necessarily how everyone experiences it.
Bang, right out of the gate... I heard that from my wife. The wife that pointed out to me that she believed I was autistic. I was like "That is because after 46 years of masking I realized I don't actually have to do that anymore." I try to keep things in check to avoid being annoying, but I have absolutely relaxed the controls that I had in place.
I am technically autistic but i dont think autism is real the problem is the antisocial social spectrum is taking over so anyone not on that spectrum seeems weird but im pretty sure one upon a time autism was normal.
The eye contact thing really bugs me. I have strabismus, so growing up and into adulthood was hard to tell what I was actually looking at. I got “are you looking at me” a lot, but I never tried to make eye contact and nobody knew. It wasn’t until I had corrective surgery that I realized I have to try to make eye contact more because people are noticing if I’m not.
9:48 look up mutations of the MECP2 gene. my little sister has level 3, debilitating autism and she has a confirmed mutation of this gene. my mom has it too, but she’s more level 1, as am i.
I'm confused here. There are two people playing off on one another but still agreeing. I am totally lost. I know the guy below has autism but the guy on top im not sure? Is he faking autism or WTF.
By "unconscious" did they mean "you're doing it without being aware that's what you're doing"? Because I would say it seems likely if by "without being aware" one means "you don't expressly understand that's what it is" I would think "Yes." Because without the words for it you're just "trying not to draw negative attention" to yourself, via doing, or not doing, things you've found draw negative attention. You might realize you're restricting yourself, but without the vocab you're not necessarily going to realize all the implications or that you're "masking" per se.
I come from a family of twice-exceptional autistic introverts, and had the misconception that autists couldn’t be social. When I met my late hubby and his family, it seemed odd to me that out of the 7 siblings, 2 had never left their parents’ home, gone to college, or had jobs, plus hubby was right on the borderline of being able to achieve these things, but they were all friendly and athletic, so I figured it couldn’t be autism. I have since realized (in the context of our daughter’s diagnosis as ADHD-PI/autistic/dyslexic) that this is just a different flavor of autism. I suspect his parents are/were (his father has also since died; that was a very rough several months for his family 😕) both autistic, and possibly ADHD, as well (fairly certain hubby was both, like me). 🤔
I am saddened to hear of your loss and I wish you didn't have to lose him, I wish for you strength of heart to the point that you are able to hold your love for him alongside your grief and sadness and pain and loneliness without being incapacitated by it and you can still find joy and love and peace and comfort ❤ Please prepare for tonal whiplash. Why did you think that being friendly and athletic meant that they couldn't have autism? It may be a reading comprehension issue on my part and you've already answered my question in your comment, if so I apologize. Was it that in your experience autistic people aren't friendly and athletic, even if they can be financially, academically, and socially successful, because your own family was like this? So the people in your own family weren't very athletic or friendly?(this feels cruel to say but as far as I can tell that was what you implied lol)
I have the opposite problem of most people, I have an autistic therapist and coworkers who believe I could be autistic, when I’m fairly confident I am not. I’m told my answers to questions sound very autistic. I just do not have any major sensory problems, and while I am extremely introverted and basically have zero social life ever since I was young, i’m not like super awkward or anything. I’m pretty good at small talk, and do very well in crowds. I can people just fine when I have to. The tests I have taken point to not autistic. I’d have to be like EXTREMELY good at masking if I was. I think I just have adhd and bipolar and am also simply weird.
It's a known thing, that people with ADHD tend to have a lot more autistic traits than the average non-ADHD population, but most of them nevertheless don't have autism. About 30% of the ADHD-population have autism on top of ADHD. 70% don't, even though they may somewhat seem autistic at times.
@@user-ly3li3ex8c You mean 80% of autistics also have ADHD. That could be about correct. But it's not the same the other way round. The majority of ADHDers don't have autism. That's more like 30%. Or maybe you mean, that 80% of people with ADHD have autistic traits. That's not the same as autism.
Im a gained savant, I was running across the road about 15 years ago almost got hit by a car then jumped to the middle thing which separates one side of the road to the other and when I crossed the road, I felt gears turning or something going on in the background of my head and my gained savant didnt show until i hit year 1 of high school.
Why pander to a NT's lack of ability to use language properly? It only makes the problem worse. If we are all unique, typical is an insult. They should have more self respect and stop caving to the authoritarian voice in their head.
Grade school I started getting really scared to order food at Taco Bell. I don't know if one specific traumatic event occurred. I really wanted my parents to talk to people in order for me because other people's behavior was so unpredictable. Every Thursday to miss an entire day of actual credit earnings School, how to get enrichment at the fitness center for creative arts in Hamilton Ohio. Being bussed to go to Garfield junior high as we cross the bridge over the river. I think contrapoints observed ones that when people are on the Spectrum they'll find people who are more observably not considered normal or somehow like it's that fear of missing out psychology of being mean to people you see when you have an advantage. I wish I had a sociology degree by now I'm enrolled to study environmental science probably will have a tool in journalism or public policy or something like that. Then after being in service industry at a nursing home in a hospital, talking to people and performing physical tasks in person is an absolutely core part of that job, schizoid after the years of my teens and after dropping out of high school and being on online forums so the music communicating was by typing on a qwerty keyboard, now when voice to text on a cellular device as possible. Oh this started though I was going to mention being an outpatient psyche at a hospital and the lady leading the group I said something about not wanting to make eye contact and she just basically made a show of his comment about the dominant culture like and substitutions you're going to have to make eye contact. Actually it's a funny story back when I was in my early twenties it was going to be the first presidential election I can vote in cuz I missed out on voting in 04 by 4 days, and dropped out of high school the Monday after the Saturday I turned 18. So I was at my parents house on an afternoon either didn't have to get up for work yet or a day I didn't work in a dish room where I worked like cleaning up dinner then closing shift in the dish room, play this young man knocked on my door I forget exactly what he was asking about but he made some comments about my dog was racist just cuz he was barking at him like. I understand where John McWhorter is coming from sometimes about professional victimhood. I've been smoking weed so I was actually capable of considering answering a phone and talking to someone right away when it rang instead of freezing and suffering as it rang and I felt like I was denying someone access to me, African-American man knocked on my door and I answered I did make him since I contact and he made a comment about having eye contact and then said something about like is your dog trained to be racist like he didn't raise it exactly that way but I know it was what he was getting at. That was a joke because he can tell I didn't have any animosity toward him and my dog just barks at people we don't know when they come to the door. My uncle walked in like I have a family members who are abusing foster care so like they have a little more PTSD that might come out and how the animals around them respond when there's someplace.
I have one grandmother who died in institution in Cincinnati in 1980 before I was born to be able to meet her who was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. Uncle who ended up having to live in different institutions depending on if he had a PTSD outburst which obviously was diagnosed with medicated is paranoid schizophrenia and bipolar, after he couldn't live in a two-bedroom apartment with my oldest Uncle anymore and then another Uncle who's a twin of one of my parents he was able to work part-time at a grocery store bagging and then take care of a bedridden wife but also was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia and I think it was then revised to bipolar. I saw them have movement disorders and parkinsonism from the medication and the one Uncle who was institutionalized himself so morbidly obese that affected his health and quality of life. I'm trying to figure out a way to afford medical cannabis now that legal in my state I even have a car and my income is just too small for me to have learned how to budget yet between paying my bills feeding my cats and then having money left over for that type of medicine plus if I actually want to buy anything else at the store.
My mom had me diagnosed when I was 2 and I have Asperger syndrome and I speak this no one should claim they’re autistic until they get diagnosed by a professional and I grew up knowing that I am I swear everyone self diagnose without going to a actual psychologist and it’s honestly stupid
Are you saying your mom had a suspicion of your autism? That is all self diagnosis is - a suspicion. The psychologist, if they are trained well enough, (and some are not) just confirms it. It has to start somewhere. Not everyone had the luxury of knowing so early and suffered thru life until their own "lightbulb moment" kicked in.
@@scotthrich I’m not lying to you. She took me to a therapist. She told me to a psychologist. She’s a nurse. If you think I’m lying I’m really gonna be angry.
@@scotthrich she had me diagnosed. I didn’t diagnose myself. I never had. I couldn’t have. She’s a nurse. She’s was a single mom. She had me diagnosed.
