One thing that would help (if you are able to) when there’s no wifi for Craig is to always have something he’d like to watch actually downloaded to his *phone* . That way if it goes down & he can’t ‘self-soothe’ you could just go to where it is on his phone (don’t let him know, it’s like a secret weapon..lol) & YOU can put it on for him. 😁 Only to be used ‘in case of an emergency’ for him after all avenues of calming fail. If you don’t have the space on the phone you could also have *multiple* shows/videos/movies loaded on a flash drive too, I think you can get over 200gb drives now, so you could just ‘plug & play’. Hope this helps! 💜
I appreciate you and your family's vulnerability in sharing your lives with us. Your daily life is inspiring and fun to watch. Thank you and continue having a great day (a la Craig!)
I have no clue how I stumbled upon your videos, I also don't have anyone in my life that struggles with autism but it's an absolute pleasure watching these videos. I'm learning a lot about Autism but also enjoy watching your day to day with Craig. You're a very loving mother who reminds me a lot of my own. Craig is an absolute gem of a human. The thing that amazes me most about him is his memory of television shows, when he names actors and says the lines it just puts a smile on my face. Thank you for giving us a glimpse of your life!!
As someone who works in the mental health field, using the Minnie Mouse video as a way to access his tears is very good. In my field, we call the ranting hard pain and it can go on and on, but the crying is soft pain, which is like a wave and has a beginning, middle and end. That wave allows the nervous system to re-regulate. You are a beautiful person, Craig's Mama.
Yes, the ranting is just a way to process all the stuff that is put in my head. Especially when I am by myself. But when something is bothering me for a while, I can rant to other people and can come across as being complaining a lot. They usually think I do it because they are there...little they know how 'bad' it can be when I am by myself. I often get a sore throat of all the talking. And that is when my cat steps in, she talks back, asks for some attention and since I can't multitasking, I stop ranting and focus on her. It snaps me out of it for a while. 😅
As someone with Asperger's, expressing emotions is very hard and when things change or something upsets us our brain goes into a melt down and it is very difficult to focus on anything else other than the thing that's upsetting us. Crying is a great way to get rid of the tension and stress and clear your head so you can restart and begin to move on. I don't think Craig wants to focus on the things that upset him. I think that he just needs help moving past those emotions. And at least for me that is easily the best way to do it.
Both of my sons have ASD, my oldest has Aspergers and l often sit with him and just talk, it's very one sided though, he's a closed book 😂. I check in regularly to make sure he's doing okay as he's the quietest kid l have and he's the same, finds expression of emotion difficult.
@HellJumper Same here bro ,same here. Rather some pretty bird , anything but the thing that upsets me. Thank you for explaining it to me like that 😁never could put it to words exactly 👍👍
I love that you are asking questions & input from others. You provide such great insight into Craig's thoughts, emotions & processes. The story about the Ferry made me sad 😢... mostly for Craig, you & Joe, along with anyone who was around (I love that you acknowledge how others might feel). Your drink & food looked delicious. Oh my goodness, seeing Craig 😴 in Spiderman was so sweet... tell Craig I went & fell 😴 too! Reading to Livy & her asking for another read & Craig looking to you (with a tone like he didn't want to) & then already looking like he was going to read again for Livy was so sweet! It's so apparent he loves Livy & can't say no to her!
Meltdowns are not easy at home, but in public they can be very embarrassing. People think that the parent did something to cause it, like abuse. Interestingly, I am more of a disciplinarian than my wife. My wife takes the give in approach. As they get older, they are more likely to have a meltdown with her, while they are much more well behaved with me. Please know that we are all in the same boat. Children as well as Adults with Autism will have meltdowns. We all find it difficult to deal with, especially in public. All the very best from one parent to another and stay strong. ❤
Oh darn it that "Ma..Oh fine! " Was such a cute and funny moment. ❤. Those recliner seats are tricky. Still so so amazed how American movie theatres serves meals. Would love a meal like that in front of a good flick .
You and Joe are the best... I was worried that the haters would come out when you and Joe spoke to Craig's weight and food choices. These are people who don't understand how hard it is to get food into autistic children and adults. Please, don't let ignorance deter you. You are wonderful parents. Your love for Craig and your entire family is beautiful. This is evident in the way Craig interacts with his nieces and the entire family. The majority of people who cast stones don't even know what it means to volunteer. You all have it in your heart to give back...well done! ❤
In regards to Craig’s meltdowns, try giving him a sheet of blank paper and a box of crayons and encourage him to scribble his feelings onto the paper. It’s an active way to help him release, and a great way for you to get a visual representation of the scope and magnitude of his angst when you notice the patterns emerging. Everything means something, from the size and depth of each stroke, the direction (vertical and horizontal) and the colors he chooses to represent each emotion. Just explain to him when he’s calm the strategy and why it may help him and give him the choice if he would like to try it. Label each one as to the particulars of that event and talk about it with him later. It should, eventually, help him self identify recognize triggers himself so that he can possibly head some of those overwhelming feelings and emotions off. Or at least make them less severe. In the least, it’s a good coping mechanism. Good luck to you!
Thank you for sharing that, I was going to suggest almost the same thing. I love coloring, and whenever the internet is down, it's my thing to do to keep me from being bored. I'm not autistic, but I can identify with a lot of things that frustrate people, and they're no different aside from them having stronger feelings than most.
I'm sure this is something you would have thought of, but would having some favourite videos downloaded and saved on Craig's phone be able to serve as a temporary fix in an emergency?
❤ My heart sank when you were talking about Craig slapping himself. Coping with things is definitely the biggest struggle my son faces. We are constantly working at it all the time. Hugs to you all ❤
I think its so profoundly deep that he seeks out negative videos to get the emotions out, i think alot of people do that and dont even realize it. Sometimes what the mind needs is a good cry to let the emotions out. It shows he's human just like all of us.
I was amazed by the Minnie mouse story as well and yes it is just like putting on a sad song to scream and cry along to 💞 I love Craig and the whole family 💞
Thank you so much for posting daily (I’m not sure if it’s just this week but I’m new to this channel so I’m not sure)!! I really enjoy your Q&As, chats, and vlogs. So grateful there’s amazing people like you and your family!! I look forward to these videos everyday 😊
Dearest mama, please ignore the haters. U and Joe r wonderful parents. No one knows what u go thru. Tx for showing us ur lovely family. Have a good day!
Joe middle of the movie starts recording himself with the camera light blasting “Burgers good not enough cheese curds damnit” Family behind him SHHH’s him Throws his beer on them
I bet $20 if someone in that theater wanted to throw hands with Joe they would end up watching Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse with broken 3-D glasses and a missing tooth.
Wow! Ive never been to a movie theater where you can order food and drink and eat while watching! That’s so neat! Those really must be some comfy chairs for Craig to fall asleep during the movie. I probably would also… lol Thank you for your videos. I feel you are helping people out there who are going through the same thing and don’t have anyone to help or validate or explain things. You are an excellent resource for information and a therapy of sorts for many who are struggling and don’t understand.
Your granddaughters are so cute. Love their dresses. Glad you and Craig had fun at the movie. You’re a lovely and sweet Mama!🤗🩷🙏🏻. My heart melted seeing Craig reading to Livy. She really enjoyed it.
Love us some Craig, have fun!!! It happens, it happens with us. It’s sad that at this point along society hasn’t been more educated and exposed more in depth. I’m glad he enjoyed his movie.
thank you thank you thank you thank you!!! I love to see this video and I love that you are sharing your experiences with us. My son does alot of similar things that craig does as far as watching or harping on the negative or sad things in his shows and he will reverb and repeat the scenes from his favorite shows that he can relate to and he will even try to insert them into conversation (sometimes inapplicably) YOU made me realize that he could be doing these things to experience those emotions again i had never thought of it that way and you opened me up to that. My son also has issues with transition and coping, we have to try to talk through it with him and always tell him its okay to express his emotions. My son is highly functioning without intellectual delay 5 y/o. The drawing method works to help him alot of times (crayon or pen and paper) when he is anxious and out in public. He is very picky about his routine and very aware of what that routine is.
You guys are awesome parents. Craig is blessed. I don’t know much about Autism yet. But Craig is highly intelligent. I know it must be hard at times but he is a very intelligent guy. Must be something connected to the Autism. Thanks for educating your viewers.
Meltdowns are a hard thing to deal with, my girl will get a dazed look in her eyes, and it can be there for days, and it won't go away till the meltdown. Just like you said, it seems to just build up and needs an outlet.
You are absolutely right. There is the tens silence before a storm but also the peaceful emptiness after it. Many people underestimate how busy an autistic brain is. Always, it is never quiet. Except after a meltdown.
Just finished watching today's video... another great one on the books. Speaking to meltdowns, it was interesting to hear your interpretation about how Craig was trying to make himself cry. My niece has a hard time understanding the difference between facial changes for different emotions. However, we have noticed that she has started to have meltdowns more often since puberty hit. She just turned eleven. I am going to share your vlog today with the rest of my family. Maybe it will spark an idea for our Sophia. Thank you so much for sharing your view. Much love ❤️ 😊
The emotions can be overwhelming...Talking about it helps...You are a Special Angel...Just know this!!! We Love Your willingness to share your vulnerabilities and challenges with your Autism Journey!!! Stay Strong!!! Bless You!!!
Awesome eventful day as always! For the pot suggestion…Put the pot in a bucket of water making sure it’s fully submerged and drill out one hole at a time keeping your hand steady on the pot as you go! You and your family are beautiful and keep up the great videos ☺️
For me. I'm 35 years old. I have a mild Di George Syndrome, and born with a heart condition; and I get really bad melt downs; or anxiety. One time when we were at the front gate to get into Disneyland. My app says that I wasn't registered? My mom was, and I tried to kept calm; but sometimes its like a ticking time bomb. I suddenly cried, and get upset. The guy took off his mask, and looked at the manager for help. She rushed over. My mom was telling that we can go look inside the hotels instead, but a few minutes later. The manager fixed it with her phone that she let me put my email in. I said thank you, and we got in. The old man at the front gate said " we want to make sure everyone is happy," to my mom. It's just I find it hard to control my anxiety because it was just starting to get better. The stay home order from Covid made it much worse when I went back to work, so my employee gives me Calm drops to help me. Also my friends on Twitter suggested fizzy drinks like Sprite, listening to music, or sometimes an icy pack around my neck helps. Also my dad once told me that I got scared from this Mickey Mouse cartoon. I forgot what movie we were seeing, but they would go cartoons before the movie starts. Anyway. It was about Mr. Pete being really big, and I think you'll see an evil Mickey? I haven't seen it in a long time because it was a really dark cartoon. P.S I love your videos, and your traveling adventures. ♥ I hope to visit Iowa one day.
I googled and it says head slapping is a sign of frustration. I felt frustrated hearing how close proximity everyone was so I get it. Not your fault Mom and Dad, you probably felt uneasy too. Glad y'all made it through.
Omg listening you sounds so much like me son, I thought it was only my son! My boys is like Craig he's a big boy for his ages and doesn't know boundaries or how people feels! Sending all my love to ya'll ❤
Thanks for sharing ,it makes a world of a difference for me. I meet people here ,often autistifriends like Craig 🥰 Ps I like all people , but respect for the hometeam ❤️🤙🤙
When Nick was in middle school I got lots of phone calls from the school because of Nick's behavior issues. It seemed like at least 4 times a month. Then when he went to high school I received one phone call in 5 years. It was on a day there was a substitute teacher and there was a misunderstanding about lunch. On Friday (fry day) he always got French fries if he had a good week. That day he didn't get his fries and he had a HUGE meltdown. Any sudden change of plans, internet disruptions, computers breaking down, the electricity going off, or the riding mower not starting can cause a meltdown --but not always. Some days he can handle things and other days he cannot. We also have issues in traffic. If Nick sees that there is an accident he can handle a delay, but if we are on the highway and traffic stops and he has no clue why we are stopped he freaks out. Again, not always. Nick also uses videos to help him cope. Nick always recites the lines from the Sesame Street show about Mr. Hooper not coming back when he hears that someone he knows has died. When he is sad he sometimes sings the Veggie Tale song "I'm so Blue, I don't know what to do.... When Nick was in preschool Nick liked to watch certain parts of videos over and over. His teacher told us that we should absolutely NOT let Nick do this. We then went to an autism seminar and the professional told us that we should let Nick rewind the tape as much as he wanted because she felt he was learning language and social cues this way. She also suggested we turn on the closed captioning so Nick could see the words because he is so visual. Nick actually was reading before he started kindergarten. Also Nick doesn't have his own cell phone. Does Craig ever use the phone to talk to people? Nick doesn't like to call anyone on the phone -- I think it is because he doesn't know if the person will answer or he will have to leave a message. Sometimes when I call my husband Nick will leave the room, but then when he knows that my husband answered he will come in and talk. Also Nick has tried numerous medications and the meds seemed to make him more upset. Love hearing about your experiences and am amazed at how similar our experiences are. Blessings!
Craig and I are a lot alike I have meltdowns too… especially when there are a change of plans and it’s hard for me to cry too. I have Bipolar Disorder and I like my routines. How I cope is breathing and calling my best friend he always knows how to calm me down 😊
quick idea about when you are at RM house, try downloading a pre set of videos this way they are loaded and ready and you don't have to pray to the wifi gods
How great was your visit to the 'pictures' (that's what we call cinema in Scotland)! A full meal, drinks and luxury seats with trays, amazing. If we have the same in the UK I've never been there. I'd fall asleep too! lol
One suggestion would be to download some of his favorite videos directly to his phone so that he does not need WI-FI to access those. That way, when Wi-Fi is out or just not good, he can still watch something until it comes back.
You can always download a few videos directly to Craig's phone that way he can be offline and still be able to watch something until WiFi is available. "Have a great day"
I have noticed that Craig is so fast on his feet, I am only just learning about Autism through you guys and i am curious ... is this because of his Autism or is this just Craig being Craig. Thank you for sharing your delightful Son with the rest of the world 🌎...Australia here, home of the Kangaroo, Koala and the meat pie 🥧
I don’t know why or how I stumbled upon your videos, but for some reason it’s just so nice to know that Craig has such a loving and patient family. I also think Craig is super cool and he likes a lot of the things that I like (I’m 29 lol). But I’m glad he has such a great support system. I think I also see a lot of my 8 year old nephew in Craig too as he’s in the spectrum as well. I sound like I’m digressing but thank you for your videos!
Thinking of Craig cry makes me cry! 😢 That’s a really interesting observation about him watching the Minnie Mouse video. I’m a special education teacher and I had a student who would recite Sesame Street episodes throughout the day. When something upset her, she would go to a part of the episode where a character (usually Elmo) expressed negative emotions. It was almost like she was expressing her emotions through Elmo. Craig’s Minnie Mouse video reminded me of this. Also, I’ve always wondered the same thing about flower pots! I guess you just keep it in the plastic thing it comes in (that has holes) and then put that into the pot? Then take it out when you water it and let it drain in the sink? I don’t know! This is what I do though! Lol
Thank you for sharing! It is actually pretty clever of them to figure out a way to deal with that emotion. I’m so glad that you shared that with me. Im hoping that in understanding Craig’s coping methods that I will be able to find a way to help him with those meltdowns
My sons meltdowns are very similar. Probably 75% of them are related to internet or apps not working. The rest are anxiety, waiting, or change of plans. Would it help if Craig brought his portable dvd player in when he does laundry? So he has a backup way to watch a movie?
You such wonderful sweet mon Craig such delight too watch he makes my anxiety go away i have best a friend she had autism too these video help me to understand more about autism God Bless
my parents would call that getting "Stuck" when you cant move on from being upset, sometimes you just need to let him process it in a healthy way, I know thats easier said then done, but maybe you can ask him how his favorite character would act in this situation, maybe it will get him to think about his favorite shows and tv just a suggestion. love your videos! thank you
I get really upset when somebody steals my seat or parking spot (at work). Or when my work routine is interrupted or suddenly changed. Sometimes when plans are changed. Yes, im on the spectrum.
Oh yes my son has them often in school and sometimes in family members homes. He doesn't like to wear clothes all day so he tries to undress everytime we go out. 😊 We try to keep him happy and family understands and we just bring pajamas or shorts and a t-shirt so he can be comfortable. Melt downs usually happen when he wants to leave the home where ever we go. It's too much sometimes but we deal with it. Just a week ago we were at his aunt's home and every chance he got he ran outside. Luckily each time someone was outside to catch him but, he did run into the street both times. I can't wait until he is at the stage when he understands danger. ❤❤❤❤❤
Craig had those phases too! When he was younger we have to have him wear jeans with a belt or he would have been naked most of the time. He also had a running phase which thankfully didn’t last too many years. Most people will never understand these struggles, but the will also never get to witness the joys and rewards that we do
Wi-Fi is really hit or miss at a lot of locations so I just use my data plan if I can’t wait till I get home. I think Craig should get an unlimited data bundle for Christmas
Not sure if it is just a feature of youtube Red (premium) but I would try to download some youtube videos before? Obviously I don't know Craig but that might work :)
If he has RU-vid Premium on his phone, he should be able to download stuff to watch when his phone is offline - an emergency stash if you will! Could be worth a try!
No worries you do a great job I have both ADHD and Autism I am in my late 40's and boy do have Melt downs I them when I am overwhelmed my roommate is super lazy they do no chores and that's when I melt down one of my house mates so bossy so again I have a melt down. I cry or I shunt down Sometimes I yell but I mostly cry or shut down ,when I shut down I refuse to talk or leave my room . I remember once my went to McDonald's and every got their food but workers forgot my food and I lost it sure my mom went back to get my food but at the moment I was angry.
He probably does have an issue with expressing crying. That is sweet and also sad about the burnt cookies video. We all gotta rant sometimes, and cry. His approach is his.
Love to hear something about steph and Craig's relationship over the years. How he did, how she dealt with him, and how they are now. The videos make them seem like best friends
Yes everything that u spoke of I go through with my two autisms boys trust me it’s very hard raising children and adult children with autism so that’s why I’m a big supporter of the Autism community because all of us parents now how hard it is raising them but we also have the good side of the autism also which is also rewarding because u see the good and beautiful side of autism children and adults and thank u for bringing awareness to people ❤
My daughter was 6 or 7, she was diagnosed with High spectrum Autism in kindergarten, she would pick q-tips and toothpicks, Kleenex. Toys all out of there containers to look at them, she would say so she could see them. She has gauchers disease, and before she was diagnosed she was very skinny, except her belly. The disease is what they call a starvation disease, it was awful. Well she was diagnosed at 3, so then she could get the treatment she needed. Well after her diagnosis I was told to feed her whatever she wanted to get some weight on. Well at 67 or seven they said I didn't need to do this any more, Well I cut her back chocolate and this was a trigger point for her, she started screaming and it was awful, Well I walked away because I had told her we had to cut back yo help keep her weight under control. Well due to her disease she got 1 of the worst bloody noses, since she was a baby. It was scary but I then told her this us what happens when you throw tempertantrumes so this has to stop. It scared her, and she never let that happen again.
Can u imagine daily meltdown for years? Yeah and not being married or engaged... I went thru this alone. Palm beach county has wonderful group homes for ones in need.
With a pot without a drainage hole you keep the plant in the plastic container it was bought in (unless you're reporting into a larger pot) put some small stones in the bottom of your pretty pot and set the plastic pot in on those stones.
I don't want to overstep. Have you thought about a therapist to help Craig learn coping skills. My son is 20 and is also on medication for his autism. Brian would yell and hit me and his sister or himself. It has helped him learn to express his emotions in positive ways.
Yes. My son would have these melt downs and it’s almost like a release for my son. He seems almost like a huge release needed. Yes. My son would make havoc if his internet isn’t working. He broke several phones. Because of being upset.
Flower pot with no drainage hole.. you put the plant or flowers in a plastic pot with holes in bottom that will fit inside the decorative pot. Place pea stone in the bottom of the decorative pot and place the plastic pot inside.
Sometimes I feel meltdowns are a repetitive behavior because they are aware of what's going to happen but still get upset if sequence is not followed. I have to walk the same way through a store or else meltdown. I decided everyday to do something off course to push my kiddo and although its frustrating because I don't want S.I.B I'm praying that coping skills will start to kick in. Today, it was a success shopped for blender then we went to tv section my kiddo loved. We had a few tears and shouts but no S. I.B.
You have done well. Your information is very helpful to many parents and people that may not understand what autism is about. Who better Then to explained then a parent who has children or child then the mother of an autistic child.
an idea: let him download some videos on youtube so he can watch them offline and establish that these are for times when his device does not have an internet connection.. might help?! good luck 🍀
Hi Mom, i switched from IPhone to Google pixel 7pro as apple slow the older models down. People think its internet connections, its a tough situation. You guys are great, i think you're doing a wonderful job 👓
3:48 oh yes! Sometimes I am done with trying to balance. Sometimes I just want to 'reset' and that is what a meltdown does. I like to compare it with a dam. To protect the valley, there is a dam. The lake above will collect all the sensory input and to prevent it from overflowing, there is a little gate that is always open. But we have to manage that gate, open or close it a bit all throughout the day and that is exhausting. So, every now and then I choose to ignore that thing and let it run its course. Which means the dam is going to overflow. And than the valley gets overflown and we loose control. And whilst that feels awful, it also means that the lake has dumped a lot of water and it takes a while to fill up again, so it gives some respite for a while. So WANTING the meltdown...not really. Wanting the relieve that a meltdown brings...oh, absolutely, you bet! There is such an amazing feeling of emptiness, of nothingness after a meltdown.
Maybe download some movies etc.... then no cellular or wifi watch whatever you have downloaded I am not a professional but agree with that emotional release...I do that in the shower sometimes too So happy U had a great movie day.
