Dear Wendy, please don't be offended by the staring. We stare - period. Not only at black persons. Many foreigners experience the "german stare", no matter the skin color.
i enyoyed the video, 100% true about being black in Germany, well somehow you get used to it, use the good stuff to make up for the awkwardness lol😂and yes the safety and security in Germany (not 100% perfect though) is applaudable
Awww…I’m so glad you enjoyed this💞💞 Absolutely, we definitely have to use the good stuff to make up😄😄 because Germany is still a great country to live in
Hello Wendy, They’re not staring at you, they are looking at you - because people are, in general, interesting to look at, and in Germany it’s done honestly and openly. It’s also called people-watching. And in your case, you are also very good-looking. I do find that many Germans forget to smile when they people-watch. ;-) (I acknowledge that there are some people who might actually be staring.) The reason that people ask where you came from is that they are honestly interested in you. People ask me that also, often because they still hear some accent, when I speak, even after living in Germany for 18 years and speaking German for 30 years. I’m glad that you feel so safe in Germany. I also feel safe here and it is one of the things I like the most about living here.
Hey girl, I’m Turkish in fourth generation born and living in Germany obviously I don’t look German but I can tell you that the staring it’s normal even I do this without recognising 😫
Depends on where you go. Also a good thing to keep in mind no matter where you end up visiting, not all prejudices are right and not all are wrong. It can be fun to meet people and just strike up a conversation. 😄 I heard we Germans can come off as humorless but that's not the case for all of us. Enjoy your time here.
A lot of white immigrants are telling the exact same story about the staring. So I guess that's not because of your color. Apparently we stare at all people. But men like to stare a lot at beautiful women. So just choose the reason...
We used to stay in a smaller city with very few black people. Initially, i used to be conscious, but i got used to it over time. Regarding being curious about our hair type, i can completely relate to that. I had a lady walk up to me in the mall once to ask if my hair was natural and how long it took me to braid my hair (i had extensions on), and i explained to her that it wasn't actually my natural hair and that since i braid my hair myself, it takes a little longer than normal. She appreciated the explanation and went ahead and told me that she's met a few black people who weren't so nice or patient to explain how it works but that she understands and is genuinely curious. I used to tell myself that i was doing them a favour seeing my natural hair out. Lol.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience! I guess the challenges of living abroad never ends, one can only get used to them. And it’s so nice of you to explain to the lady because I also know some of them are just genuinely curious.
Most of the people I know use the combination of facial features and hair style to identify the people they know. If you change the style you wear your hair even your friends may not recognize you on the street (happened to me with my first perm). Wigs or extensions are not very common as accessories but rather used to cover missing hair (by Europeans).
@@wora1111That’s right…the questions and comments about the hair has a lot to do with changes in facial features and appearance which is very understandable
The fact that people stare at you has almost nothing to do with you being Black. In Germany, staring is common among everyone. It's often a mix of curiosity and interest, rarely judgmental. It's just a cultural thing.
I have gotten quite a lot of interesting responses about the 'German stare' since I made this video, and I’m glad I did because now I know that the stares are often out of curiosity and interest…totally harmless Thank you for sharing your perspective!
I've seen multiple discussions in expatriates' forums that discuss "The German Stare", so I suppose that Germans really _do_ stare a lot when compared to other cultures.
As a German, I can say, we often don't even notice that we stare. At least I don't. I am always caught by foreign friends, who tell me: Stop staring? And I regularly say: "Did I stare? I was just looking around?" I think it is a different perception of privacy. If you are at a common space you are fair game to be looked at in Germany. Wich I realize can be kind of nervewrecking for other cultures. But again, I wouldn't even notice it, if I hadn't friends from other countries. And to be honest in my expirience we also stare at other germans, no matter the skin colour. When I lived in the city I had staring contests 2 times a day in the tram.^^
Thank you so much! I have also had a lot more positive experiences living in Germany. And yeah, I only got to know about the stares being harmless and just out of curiosity since I made this video…lol
Being stared at means you do not look like everybody else. That will happen to the girl in the boy's soccer team, the guy with tattoes all over his face, the new student in class or the guy in the wheelchair, simply because they do not fit the pattern. But this wears off quickly, and other attributes gain importance for referring to a person.
@@Bibirallienot for Germans. In Germany there‘s staring out of curiosity and/or admiration and staring. One can usually see the difference and it’s the first most of the time.
@@jennyh4025 I'd say it's LESS rude for Germans, because in Germany it is customary to make eye contact a lot (during conversations), more so than in many other cultures, and it is generally not considered rude to look at people when you are in a public space. However, prolongued staring at strangers is still considered bad manners also in Germany. Many who do it probably aren't intentionally rude, they just have a look and if they see something unusual on a person, they get distracted and don't realized that they have stared at that one person way longer than it would still be appropriate.
@@Bibirallie I`m German. And a big NO, it is not rude. Not at all. I look at people. From any age, gender, color .... It´s quite normal. Guess what: I even looked into her face for several minutes in this video! People post RU-vid videos. From themselfes looking into the camera. Wanting the video to be "clicked", to be liked, want the video to be watched. Worldwide. They present their face over the whole screen. No problem if I click the video several times. They want the video to be shared to thousands other people via social media. But they have a problem when they sit in a bus and get looked at. (Maybe even by a follower of the RU-vid channel) Isn´t this weird?
@@klaus2t703 Hi, I understand staring is totally normal and harmless in Germany… at least from reading all the amazing comments under this video I got to learn a lot of possible reasons why Germans stare. However, it is also ok for me to feel uncomfortable when I’m being stared at since I’m coming from a totally different country where staring is perceived as being rude; especially when you just stare at me without saying anything. I am allowed to imagine a lot of reasons in my head why I’m being stared at. And there’s a big difference between looking and staring.
I have to command you making a video about being black in a country which has no black people heritage. BUT we germans like to stare. That is what also americans complain about germans. That must not have to be for you being black. When i see a black person in germany it is (close) to normal for me today. We live in a global world and black people, asians and so on are not that alien anymore as when i was a child. When i was a child people from turkey or portugal were alien to us. Now people from various countries live in germany. So, no one living on this earth is alien to us anymore. Maybe slightly more rare than others, but that's about it. There are two things i have to admit regarding your video. First the music is distracting. I don'T like it. I hope your next video i encounter has no music.😀 And the second thing i noticed is that i can hear from your accent that your are from africa. Don't get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with being from Africa. But why is it so noticeable in the pronunciation of african people that they are from afrcia? Why don't they never sound like black american people? And i hope that i haven't offended you asking you this. It is something i am asking myself for decades (when i started to get more and more fluent in english, while listening to movies and series produced in the USA and/or England). And i want to close my inquiry. 😀
Hi, thank you for sharing your perspective. I actually got to learn from the comments under this video a lot of possible reasons why Germans stare….curiosity, admiration, etc. Thank you for taking notice of the music…I also got that from a couple of people in the comments. My channel is a new one, barely 3 months old when I made this video…. So yea, it’s a work in progress; and I intend to keep making improvements as I learn with each video I make. Finally, the accent from Africans when we speak English is as a result of the numerous indigenous languages spoken in different countries all over Africa. For instance, there are over 500 indigenous languages spoken in my country Nigeria. Local dialects are spoken by millions of Africans. English came to be the primary, official, or secondary language because of colonization. So yea, even when we speak English our local dialects kinda gets in the way 😅. It’s basically the same way the Spanish, Asian, etc have accents when they speak English.
@@wendyazubuike Thanks for answering to me that quick. People from Ireland or Wales have an accent. Also from Australia. That is what i call an accent, The reason i asked about the different pronunciation from people from africa is that i did not understood it as an accent, only asking myself why people from africa are pronouncing everything so hard and harsh. To my ears it sounded not like an accent, more like a minor flaw in the pronunciation only here and there that should easily be possible to correct.(please forgive me my bluntness, but that it is how it sounds to me). For example i heard you say "tumbs" instead of "thumbs". You did not speak the "th", at least i didn't hear it. A minor thing, that could be easy to correct (in my humble opinion). But you are right. If one takes the pronunciation of people from afrca when they speak english as an accent, then i can try to see it in a different light than before. Thanks for clearing it up for me 😀 Btw. i don't want to forgot to mention that in rare cases people staring at another person it can be that they are deep in thought and do not even notice that they are staring at another person. I recalled that this happend to me in the train a couple of years back. i was the one staring and noticing it at some point, but wasn't actually looking. And/or they like what they are seeing. A beautiful woman is always worth a look or two 😀
They stare because most of them haven’t been out of their zone before. They haven’t seen your skin color before and are amazed or even love it and are shy to say it. Thats it .
I totally understand that it’s out of curiosity for most of them, which is nothing bad But one can be curious whilst keeping the other person’s feelings in mind, because it’s usually embarrassing when you’re being stared at.😀
@GistCafe What village are you talking about? ;) Staring is just a general trait. We stare at everybody. And we all get stared at, as well. All the time. No matter which skin colour we have.
@@MartinAmbrosiusHackl I bet your response if for the wrong handle. Read who typed what? Did you see any village in my comment or assumed? Tag to the right person.
They have seen people of all skin shades, of course they have. Imigration started decades ago, Germans no longer look a certain way. Which is very good. You can be the only black person in a place but you will not be the only person whose grandparents where born in another country or that looks " different".
If you are moving to another country, you can eighter try to understand what´s different in this country or you can choose a negative, mostly complaining attitude. You seem to prefere the last one. When I lived in Asia, I was asked over and over again, where I came from and what specifically has brought me there. So what? As European, I was looking different and the people were just interested or curious about my home country. As long as you have no inferiority complex about your home country, it should be no problem to give an answer. Different from the US or some european countries with a long colonial history (Germany colonial history only lasted for about 30 years), there haven´t been a large black community). Due to massive immigration of refugees during the last 10 years, it isn´t something as a big sensation anymore to see people with darker skin; but for this reason, people tend to identify black people at first glance more as refugees than as students or businesswomen.
No, you’re wrong…I do not prefer to choose the negative and complain. If you watched my video till the end you’ll know that. I don’t think the purpose of this video is to complain about Germany…but to just share my experiences here. Just maybe anyone moving/visiting Germany would not find them weird, but normal…since I found them weird when I moved here until I realized that they were normal. And this is because of cultural differences, which is not a bad thing. And it has nothing to do with "inferiority complex” as well. So yeah, I don’t have problems with Germans or living in Germany…because I actually love it!
I've understood that it's just a cultural difference...some cultures believe it's weird/rude to stare, while others don't attach anything to staring. It's totally understandable! And thank you for watching!
@@wendyazubuike That whole black thing is an American thing. No one says I'm white they usually say I come from this country and end of discussion but somehow in the US it all becomes a he's just black no I'm more than that I come from another country. Also calling someone black is very offensive it puts everyone in one box which makes no sense when there are more African countries then European countries. Meaning Africans are more diverse than Europeans.
Thank you for sharing your experiences! To me it’s always interesting to see how people from other countries feel in Germany. Staring: yes, we do stare. But most of the time it’s not malicious, but curiosity and/or admiration. Shock at seeing you in a university setting: wouldn’t happen to me, because most black adults I met in my life (childhood and as an adult) were doctors or teachers. 🤷♀️ Questions: yes, we are curious and changing your hair changes the way you look a lot. And don’t forget many Germans do not spend a lot of time to do their hair.
Thank you so much for sharing your perspective! Yes, I understand that a lot of times it could be out of curiosity and admiration…at least for some people. But we can also agree that curiosity is different from being rude. I think one can be curious whilst keeping the other person‘s feelings in mind.
@queenazubuike931 it doesn't affect us at all, because we are used to it! 😂 We do it at each other aswell! I really don't know why! I guess its the combination of, other people are more interesting then the outside, try to check who could be dangerous and who would help or could need help or have to stand up first when old people took in and you are just in the view of the most comfortable headposition...and a deep down wish to TALK with you but being afraid to do the first step but try to give YOU the confidence to start a conversation 😊
"Where are you from: Why is it so important?" I watch white people traveling through Africa. What´t the first question in every village: "Where are you from?" What´s wrong with that? It is quite expectable. When you do something different, when you look different it´s just normal that the other people want to know about you. You may be a negative person and be annoyed by getting the same question again and again... or you may be a positive thinking person and be happy that so many people want to get to know you. Exchanging meaningful information is the first step to get integrated. That´s why it is important. And this is a good thing! It´s the first step to get friends. You can be proud of your heritage, you can be proud of your confidence to move to a foreign country, so you may proudly tell other people about you. You say this is ignorant. If you refer ignorant to "ignore" ... then they exactly do the opposite. They don´t ignore you. Instead they try to become familiar with you. Honestly your "they become shocked when you tell them that you are here for studying". THIS is prejustice ... but from your side. You are a guest here, get the school for free, so is it asking too much for acting like a guest? I´m far from being a racist, but how you act is food for racists. You come to Germany, obviously using the benefits, but complain about this and that. Don´t give the racists a reason to be a racist! Don´t make them even bigger. We already have too much of them. Don´t forget: Saying this, I´m on your side. Mind: Racists don´t ask "Where are you from" ... they prejustice just by your color. So let the good people ask questions and be happy when they are interested in you and your history and your stories.
Hi. I think you got it all wrong. Sharing my experiences that I felt were weird for fun is totally different from complaints. I mean it didn’t look like I was angry in the video. And about using Germany benefits, I moved to Germany to study, I paid my fees and still pay my taxes; so why not? Thank you for sharing your perspective!
It feels a bit weird that people are shocked a black person would come to Germany to study. In my experience the most common ways a black person came to Germany is either for study, American or Brits that served here as soldiers and decided to stay, or be abuse they were born here and are children of any of the people mentioned before. While you don’t see many black people in Germany, foreign students at university are quite common.
Being the only black person has become normal for me. One just have to bear it in mind. And for the staring, stare back at them 😂😂😂 For the hair stuff, I asked them to get use to me having different new styles😅. I also feel very safe in 🇩🇪. Great video Wendy!! You are doing wonderful 🎉🎉
I guess these are the challenges of living abroad. And what would life be without its challenges and leaving our comfort zones?😅😅 Thank you so much dear, for your comment and sharing your experience❤️❤️
I lived in Freiburg (south western Germany) as a student, and I have friends in different cities in Germany with similar experiences as well. Berlin probably has more immigrants in it, as you’ll see in any capital city. I‘m pretty sure you‘ll have a different experience if you move to a different city.
Hi Chris, I‘ve lived in Southern Germany for a couple of years and currently live in the Northern Germany… and this happened to be my experiences so far
@@wendyazubuike As a German, I'd say most of them don't take offense, but rather first find it odd, wonder why you stare at them, then they realize that they had been staring at you long enough to make it feel creepy and are emberassed about it.
@wendyazubuike I would say most of us don't take offense. I mean, we just did the same. We are most likely embarrassed and uncomfortable because you staring back makes us realize we probably stared longer than it would have been appropriate.
Why are you in germany Wendy? Why should germans smile, when they see you? Are you a qualified hard working employee re do you get social benefits, germans have to work for. Germans do not need your aproval, its the other way round. Explain and justify your presents in germany.
