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Bill Burr - Fat Guy On An Airplane 

the Monday Morning Podcast Clips
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29 окт 2024

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Комментарии : 520   
@hallowedition
@hallowedition 11 лет назад
someone needs to animate this
@waddellkate101
@waddellkate101 9 лет назад
Best idea ever
@morrossey
@morrossey 9 лет назад
If I could pick a narrator for my life, it'd probably be Bill
@thescoutabout
@thescoutabout 8 лет назад
+ladsham Be careful what you wish for.
@CStrik3r
@CStrik3r 8 лет назад
+thescoutabout Morgan Freeman's voice and Bill Burr's everything else .. even though his high pitched voice does have an effect
@keithbecknell6994
@keithbecknell6994 8 лет назад
Him as a narrator is a great idea.
@OhHeyItsAlexx
@OhHeyItsAlexx 8 лет назад
I never realized the voice in my head was Bill Burr, until I listened to Bill Burr.
@MegaRez111
@MegaRez111 7 лет назад
that's a great idea
@essayboi
@essayboi 9 лет назад
"it was like sitting next to a planet with a head." Spit my food out.
@HurricaneRonnie
@HurricaneRonnie 7 лет назад
hahaha
@matthewchant9425
@matthewchant9425 6 лет назад
good keep spitting it out and you might lose some weight fatty
@discobadger3847
@discobadger3847 6 лет назад
+Matthew Chant lofl
@stevesmooth1010
@stevesmooth1010 4 года назад
If i could choose my cause of death, it would be suffocating on a bill burr rant. His delivery of anger makes me fight for air every time....
@Humpsterlicious
@Humpsterlicious 8 лет назад
"They should have to buy 2 seats, It's good for them, Then they have less money for cookies" OH MY GOD, I cracked up laughing at that part. haha
@SDeww
@SDeww 5 лет назад
he is 100% right, infact i think all people should be weight at the airport, and than pay by the kilo, the more weight in the airplane the more fuel it will cost, so the fat people make airplane tickets more expensive!!, why should i pay the same as a person twice my weight??.
@mathiaslizm9561
@mathiaslizm9561 9 лет назад
I love how most people would say "And this... hefty guy walks in" But Bill Burr just straight up says "AND THIS FAT TUB OF SHIT SLIDES IN THE DOOR"
@jackcarter3944
@jackcarter3944 9 лет назад
+Mathias Rask And every woman on the planet will try to tell you he probably has a metabolic problem. That it never has anything to do with how much he eats.
@rhythmisadancer8394
@rhythmisadancer8394 7 лет назад
Mathias Rask 😂😂😂
@Francesco-cj3oi
@Francesco-cj3oi Год назад
He's....round
@tylercarrell
@tylercarrell 6 месяцев назад
They are fat tubs of shit though and if that offends them they can always stop eating Twinkie’s and go on a walk
@ireviewshtuff
@ireviewshtuff 8 лет назад
you can hear the fear in his voice when he describes the back fat
@anthonymiller934
@anthonymiller934 8 лет назад
I'm in tears 😂😂
@Diomedes01
@Diomedes01 8 лет назад
"It was like sitting next to a planet with a head" LMAO!
@valejojohnson
@valejojohnson 8 лет назад
now THAT was fucking hilarious! lol..
@Udgrasil13
@Udgrasil13 8 лет назад
"The Roundness of this guy!"
@FRamps
@FRamps 8 лет назад
"...22 years of mistakes he's put in his goddamn stomach!" I died.
@noneofyourbusiness8252
@noneofyourbusiness8252 7 лет назад
FR amps looool same
@FilmaticMedia
@FilmaticMedia 4 года назад
Anybody else listen to this periodically? ... I swear whenever I need a laugh i listen to Bill's rants, this one is a classic
@classentransporthotshot1496
Same here😂
@KCMedia33
@KCMedia33 Год назад
Definitely have came back to this a few times for a laugh. It gets funnier each time
@Strikerage
@Strikerage 9 лет назад
"22 years of mistakes he made in his stomach"....... ROFL
@die.3695
@die.3695 8 лет назад
excuse me sir excuse me sir can you not sir in the sir please sir?
@MegaRez111
@MegaRez111 8 лет назад
lol that shit was funny
@lucidstargirl
@lucidstargirl 8 лет назад
i burst out laughing everytime.
@alexanderbenitez2922
@alexanderbenitez2922 8 лет назад
aaron cole I lost my shit at that part. I had to rewind it like 5 times I was laughing so hard.
@louokayyo3954
@louokayyo3954 8 лет назад
God that was gold.
@demolitor2359
@demolitor2359 6 лет назад
aaron cole I lost my shit
@brasso4u
@brasso4u 10 лет назад
I'm overweight and I'm working on it. This guy is fucking funny and exactly right.
@bobmeyer854
@bobmeyer854 10 лет назад
Good for you man, keep it up.
@danelamoreaux5307
@danelamoreaux5307 10 лет назад
Right on man.You can do it!.The King Bill Burr for President.Awesome picture by the way.
@veeatemoder8695
@veeatemoder8695 7 лет назад
"I shave that ham right down"....best line
@nicholasgiordano7605
@nicholasgiordano7605 9 лет назад
I feel the anger in his voice, he's fucking hysterical
@TheEloquentEye
@TheEloquentEye 8 лет назад
'Have yourself a Sundae.. on a Monday'. That was amazing.
@KarmenTang100
@KarmenTang100 7 лет назад
"Dude, do you ever stop eating?" I FUCKING CANT!!!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@Soccercrazyigboman
@Soccercrazyigboman 9 лет назад
Have you ever laughed soo hard that it hurts to laugh. Like I mean you got lockjaw from laughing and your lungs can't take anymore or your abs? This is what I am going through right now watching this video
@Asdfgqedfglo
@Asdfgqedfglo 4 года назад
Lol yes!!!
@distractos
@distractos 8 лет назад
I feel like if Bill Burr wasn't a comedian, he would be a serial killer xDD
@feonor26
@feonor26 5 лет назад
But the good Dexter kind that only takes out the trash
@googleisillukinati8071
@googleisillukinati8071 5 лет назад
I feel like he is a serial killer
@prestohobo7685
@prestohobo7685 4 года назад
@@googleisillukinati8071 he is a functioning psycho like he admits before but he knows he wont do it just thinks about it lol
@maxcohen13
@maxcohen13 12 лет назад
"These fat people try to leave the arm rest up, but I'm not having any of that. I shave that ham right down" LOL!!!!!
@RanThaMan
@RanThaMan 7 лет назад
I'm howling over here. Almost choked on my coffee. Thanks, Bill 😂
@carrnil
@carrnil 8 лет назад
"Less money for cookies" Literally almost passed out - so out of breath because of this!
@MarquisGemini
@MarquisGemini 8 лет назад
"It was like sitting next to a planet with a head" Oh dear Satan in Hell im stealing that one hahahahahahaha
@superspecky4eyes
@superspecky4eyes 7 лет назад
"Dude, do you ever stop eating?" ROFL
@farishaddadin1
@farishaddadin1 Год назад
“His f*cking legs spread out like he was gonna give birth to a baby calf” 🤣🤣🤣🤣
@johnnydarvall
@johnnydarvall 9 лет назад
I love it when someone else rages on my behalf - thanks Bill
@arkinhk2019
@arkinhk2019 9 лет назад
Also. Planes are restricted based on weight. However, a tarb of lard who weighs 400+ lbs pays no more than me - and I am restricted to my 30kg baggage allowance. I honestly believe that we all should have a total weight allowance - personal + baggage. Much fairer. Also planes use more fuel with heavier loads - so being obese is actually environmentally unfriendly.
@jhr7190
@jhr7190 9 лет назад
Yeah, they say "We don't wanna embarrass the fatsos by having a weigh-in before each flight" -- but here's a way around that: you weigh the COMBINED TOTAL of each passenger with their luggage. If you're skinny, you get to bring more luggage. Your TOTAL of let's say $600 is what buys you a TOTAL of xxx lbs ("you plus your luggage being less than or equal to xxx lbs"), and *you pay extra dollars-per-lb* NO MATTER if you body-weight or your luggage-weight is what made you exceed your TOTAL allowance.
@taffysaur
@taffysaur 9 лет назад
Jeosef Broz That's actually a pretty sharp idea, but people would NEVER go for it (the loud people, I mean, the ones with influence).
@psychicbyinternet
@psychicbyinternet 9 лет назад
ARKINHK Unless they have a provable medical reason with a doctor's note.
@liamnegrete1120
@liamnegrete1120 7 лет назад
Genevieve55 there's no doctor note for being 400 plus pound XD
@aahyes9068
@aahyes9068 Год назад
One small airline could give it a shot. I bet there would be a lot of impotent rage protests on social media because let's face it, it takes a lot more energy to march at an airport than to march over to your computer. I also bet the seats would consistently outsell all the competitors. Of course, bear in mind you've just traded fat seat mates for a plane full of screaming, seat-kicking, diaper-filling babies & toddlers.
@tarashaw9418
@tarashaw9418 8 лет назад
I LOVE it!! I absolutely love it, he's a bloody comedic genius!! I'm so happy to have fund these podcasts!! :)
@Bmedeiros-youtube
@Bmedeiros-youtube 5 лет назад
Its ten times funnier when u realize how pissed he is and how progressively more pissed he gets though the video
@ican384
@ican384 7 лет назад
That armrest is the last line of defence
@joesoap81
@joesoap81 9 лет назад
Im 3'4 and 650lbs.
@PsykeMAJ0R
@PsykeMAJ0R 9 лет назад
Goddamn
@SuperLordHawHaw
@SuperLordHawHaw 9 лет назад
+billybob thornton A sphere?
@CharlesBartowskiHere
@CharlesBartowskiHere 9 лет назад
+billybob thornton *wolf-whistle*
@psychobillynumbnuts1
@psychobillynumbnuts1 8 лет назад
You even have a fat fuck name
@pantyosashu8137
@pantyosashu8137 7 лет назад
Your a little fattie.
@TexasBoyJc
@TexasBoyJc 5 лет назад
2:49 “Have a little bit of fucking consideration you tub of shitt” lmao Billy Redface
@Nick_315_Palumbo
@Nick_315_Palumbo 11 месяцев назад
Love Billy boy getting so riled up! Brings me so much joy! 🤣
@Early_Lately
@Early_Lately 8 лет назад
he said, "fat lat."
@digitalmorgan
@digitalmorgan 9 лет назад
laughing so hard i dropped my bag of cookies.....
@paintballman1o1
@paintballman1o1 8 лет назад
that less money for cookies joke made me lose it, bill is a genius
@dominicjamescunneen1740
@dominicjamescunneen1740 3 года назад
i still come back to this every now and then. one of the greatest rants of all time
@random-nz7dy
@random-nz7dy 2 года назад
I love when Bill recounts the story on Conan and says he felt like quint in Jaws trying to kick the shark away when the guy was walking down the aisle towards him LOL
@sharonloozz3271
@sharonloozz3271 9 лет назад
I am a 5'9 foot , 220 lb woman, so I am technically obese , and I totally agree with Bill, that the guy should buy 2 seats. He would be more comfortable, and the passenger's sitting next to him would be more comfortable. I'm sure he wouldn't want to be squished by someone else.
@iSquishMoths
@iSquishMoths 9 лет назад
Fat fuck
@cacophonicmusic2269
@cacophonicmusic2269 9 лет назад
HostDisorder Were u hoping to get a bunch of likes by having a 2 word douchie comment... Get a fucking a life
@bigmikeobama523
@bigmikeobama523 9 лет назад
Your obese in anybodys book do some drugs or have sex or both n don't eat til your skinny then just binge ouf one day a weeek or something if u have to but exercise everyday
@jackcarter3944
@jackcarter3944 9 лет назад
+Sharon Loozz You seem open about it, Sharon. Mind if I ask how you got so heavy? Cheers.
@matthiasschulze393
@matthiasschulze393 9 лет назад
+Sharon Loozz Ms. Loozz, you are very courageous to tell us about your physical characteristics. Even though we haven't met, you are the type of person to make friends with. I must admit I am a little worried that your health may be in jeopardy by being so overweight. But you may be a woman with many activities and outgoing, i hope you can keep it up.
@DBCooper01
@DBCooper01 8 лет назад
I laughed too hard at this clip, couldn't fucking breath
@iNF4mOuSxMiKE
@iNF4mOuSxMiKE 7 лет назад
Not many comedians can make me laugh, but Bill always manages to crack me up.
@SystematikSoundz
@SystematikSoundz 7 лет назад
"Excuse me sir? Excuse me sir? Can you not sir in the sir please sir?" hahahaha
@Marco-qw2sd
@Marco-qw2sd 4 года назад
I nearly choke out of air from the ammount of laughter. I had to stop paying attention to actually breathe back Thank you so much
@MegaRez111
@MegaRez111 7 лет назад
"making a shorter walk to the store... making them EVEN FATTER!!!" this guy is too much
@ffp08
@ffp08 9 лет назад
"i shouldn't have to suffer cause you ate all the cookies in the house" lol
@danilosaita2454
@danilosaita2454 3 года назад
This bit always makes my LMAO. Every once in a while I come here for a good laugh.
@deannaharby5677
@deannaharby5677 9 лет назад
I used to be 293 at 5ft 9 " --I did and managed to always get a window seat, so I could plaster myself against the window and Not invade anyones space. I had baratric surgery and now am 189 and it is wonderful and I fit great in an airline seat ! No more seat belt extenders !!!! Fat or thin--respect other peoples space.......
@bullet4life25
@bullet4life25 11 лет назад
"with his legs spread wide open like he was about to give birth to a baby calf" - I almost died by laughing omgg ! lol
@AmeenAhmed1105
@AmeenAhmed1105 10 лет назад
Someone do an animation of this ASAP!
@manny6229
@manny6229 9 лет назад
that last joke was too funny. "Fat people are the new second hand smoke" you get thumbs up for that.
@clearfault9032
@clearfault9032 9 лет назад
never laughed so hard in my life.
@nickg887
@nickg887 12 лет назад
"you're literally consuming yourself right now" lol
@charliebrownau
@charliebrownau 9 лет назад
I am overweight but I am trying to change my diet , no more softdrink, chips , lollies, etc .... I love seeing American overweight people that complain they are overweight and they get picked on , yet they keep eating unheathly shit... I am walking 4 to 11 km a day to get exercise
@jackcarter3944
@jackcarter3944 9 лет назад
+charlie brownau So how is it working out, charlie? Are you losing weight? Good luck to you. It sounds like you're making a genuine effort.
@charliebrownau
@charliebrownau 9 лет назад
Ive lost 20 kg , I need to lose another 35kg, buying a push bike and soon to ride 14km a day (3 times a week)
@NamelessIncarnate
@NamelessIncarnate 9 лет назад
+charlie brownau Nice man.
@supastar25
@supastar25 9 лет назад
+charlie brownau keep going
@wackyfours
@wackyfours 8 лет назад
Respect 👍
@KCMedia33
@KCMedia33 Год назад
“Do you ever stop eating? (As fat guy chews his nails). Your literally consuming yourself!” 💀 😂
@rofl315
@rofl315 6 лет назад
"his fucking legs spread out like he was gonna give birth to a baby calf"! I have now two permanent dimples on my face from the laugh I got off of this shit! :D
@theMondayMorningPodcastClips
@theMondayMorningPodcastClips 11 лет назад
You're welcome. Keep laughing!
@glennhoddle10
@glennhoddle10 2 года назад
This is funny but I find Bill's most hilarious plane story was about the weird, wiry guy interrogating him on the flight to Indianapolis. Straight up *pure comedy gold.*
@eodico
@eodico 8 лет назад
"Fat ppl are the new scnd hand smoke Hey you be fat go outside!" LOL
@spencergerhardt7424
@spencergerhardt7424 5 лет назад
I was doing drywall work in my basement and I was laughing so hard at this I had to stop and sit down.
@MrDuneedon
@MrDuneedon 8 лет назад
"You gotta buy two seats -- you got less money for cookies." Perfect. Yeah, I was in this situation recently, too. Some guy next to me on a small plane, who must have gone 375-400 was in the window seat next to me, and I was on the aisle. At least I had the aisle. Still, he was all in my space -- and then some. Thank goodness that fucking flight was less than an hour.
@ianmccullough5910
@ianmccullough5910 10 лет назад
Over wieght people shouldnt be able to get PD license plates. They should have to park in the furthest spots from the entrance becuase they need the damn exercise.
@dre857
@dre857 10 лет назад
if you're over a max weight capacity for a flight, you should be required to buy two seats. let them stand on the luggage scale
@chodie4u
@chodie4u 6 лет назад
"I fucking shave that ham right down..." I lost my shit at this >.
@SelviaResearch
@SelviaResearch 10 лет назад
I love Bills fucked up analogies.
@tomtheeagle1
@tomtheeagle1 11 месяцев назад
This came up on my feed and I have just laughed so hard I feel sick! I have been there and it is so much funnier when it happens to someone else.
@frankiethetankie
@frankiethetankie 11 лет назад
I crack up when Bill yells away from the microphone, I crackup every time lol
@ElGeusinjo
@ElGeusinjo 11 лет назад
I'm on a 'Bill Burr RU-vid marathon' and i'm laughing my ass off. The delivery is perfect and i agree with most of his ideas/irritations...
@TheSlammurai
@TheSlammurai 9 лет назад
9:27 Politically Correct doesn't always mean it's correct.
@ravenflower
@ravenflower 8 лет назад
Fuuuuuck....hard to eat my soup while listening to this guy.
@ChrisGruen92
@ChrisGruen92 Год назад
Literally went through this on a flight from Hawaii
@ΝίκοςΠαναγόπουλος-ν4μ
8:31 that actually motivated me to go for a walk, thanks Bill
@gbhgvhgbh
@gbhgvhgbh Год назад
"h-he was on me!!!" 😂
@Banks4004
@Banks4004 8 лет назад
shave that ham right down hahaha
@Fallen608
@Fallen608 3 года назад
"I'm thinking oh god, not me. Please for the love of god don't pick my row" This is so fucking goddamn true. Every time you think you've gotten the 3 seat easy life some slow shit comes in at the last second to ruin it.
@sjorbepo851
@sjorbepo851 4 года назад
2 best comedians without any doubt are bill and chappelle..no one is even close to them
@reaper0-122
@reaper0-122 5 лет назад
I am on the bus right now, sitting across from the exact description of what bill is talking about. Basketball ball shorts and all. I just finished dying laughing 😂
@AntoineMalveaux
@AntoineMalveaux 6 лет назад
"He was on me, the fucking guy was on me!"
@t000lish
@t000lish 9 лет назад
"shave that ham." 6:25
@DeltaNovember614
@DeltaNovember614 7 лет назад
"Fuckin legs spread out like he's gonna give birth to a calf"
@PhDTracyWalker
@PhDTracyWalker 4 года назад
The 22 years of mistakes part killed me. I'm gonna use that.
@TedBackus
@TedBackus Год назад
during the older episodes of 'my 600lb life', when they did the humiliation shower scene at the start of the episode, i LOVED laughing at that. i think the show creators caught on that people were having too much fun at the expense of the fatties, and they removed all the hilarious parts. fat people are one of the best sources of entertainment, its hilarious , until one sits next to you
@landon1086
@landon1086 7 лет назад
" I don't play that game, I put the arm rest down and shave that ham" lmfao I'm dying
@Frankiethegreatt
@Frankiethegreatt 10 лет назад
"No, I wear the Jordan ones, that come down over my little white knees"
@random-nz7dy
@random-nz7dy 2 года назад
5:15 "SCUSE ME SIR? 'SCUSE ME SIR? CAN YOU NOT SIR IN THE SIR, PLEASE SIR?" 😂😂😂😂😂
@JAlexandrG
@JAlexandrG 7 лет назад
"I fuckin shave that ham, right the fuck down." Hahaha
@angelinabrescia9593
@angelinabrescia9593 11 лет назад
Do I wear shorts with my milky white fucking legs and offend your eyeballs ? Bill is too fucking funny to exist, omg, I am crying from laughing so hard.
@ironphoenix5145
@ironphoenix5145 5 лет назад
"My giant microwave oven head is is out there." Bill Burr could make anything sound funny.
@aeromedical6750
@aeromedical6750 7 лет назад
OMG @ 6:35 -- "I love it when they try and put the arm rest up. Oh hell no, I shave that ham right down ....". I couldn't take it anymore after that.
@jamesloftus9193
@jamesloftus9193 2 года назад
"I shave that ham down" That set off a belly laugh for me
@kschambers70
@kschambers70 5 лет назад
I can't breathe
@turtleinashirt
@turtleinashirt 2 года назад
Lol as a fat guy I couldn’t stop laughing at this one. 😂 😂 😂
@2tonetouch
@2tonetouch 12 лет назад
"Hey you want to be fat go outside." Lmao
@eldude1986
@eldude1986 Месяц назад
I listen to this on repeat every time i'm sad
@seanmathews1826
@seanmathews1826 Год назад
My giant microwave oven head is out there! 😄😅🤣😂👍 Where does he come up with this shit?
@ActAccordinglyNow
@ActAccordinglyNow Год назад
Have yourself a sundae on a Monday .
@JamesShelnutt
@JamesShelnutt 8 лет назад
wow, you have such great luck with plane flights. This one and the one with the drunk guy interrogating you. Maybe you should stick to driving your own car across country. Of course then you'd probably get so irritated by the other drivers that you'd go into full blown road rage & we'd be reading about you killing someone on a highway somewhere.
@Brissles
@Brissles 8 лет назад
Spy Juice
@Dougsheehan95
@Dougsheehan95 8 лет назад
I don't think him driving is a good idea either.. "If I just leave my hand right here, nobody knows who I am.. I move it 2 degrees over here, I'm on the cover of Newsweek."
@JSalonsky
@JSalonsky 7 лет назад
so fucking funny
@MrAlexEart
@MrAlexEart Год назад
Bill is the Man!
@budczus
@budczus 10 лет назад
That's funny as shit. So damn true. A nice cold one for this gentleman.
@ygalel
@ygalel Год назад
F.cking brutal😂😂😂
@luisv.7428
@luisv.7428 8 дней назад
I think about this when i was in the middle seat trying my best to make myself smaller in consideration 😂
@Kafkaesque3
@Kafkaesque3 4 года назад
2:53 loooool 🤣
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