Borderline Personality Disorder | My Diagnosis 

Was your or your loved one's BPD diagnostic process similar to Sammy's? Access more mental health educational video series like this one HERE: bit.ly/2m6vYzx

Thank you guys so much for having me!❤️❤️❤️

Thank you for speaking out for those of us with BPD. It is largely still a mysterious & unknown mental illness.

MA Mental Health Counseling Student with Borderline Personality Disorder diagnosis here. 1. After discussing this with many other affected individuals, I feel that the term "Borderline Disorder" is so contested and stigmatized by now (I don't think it started out this way; the term was originally just that, a diagnosis, and not a punishment or derogatory term), that it needs to be replaced by something else. As somewhat mentioned in this episode, the diagnosis itself now creates almost more pain than it brings healing, as both society and clinicians don't miss an opportunity to shame and blame BPD simply for being "BPD." In my case, the diagnosis explained my symptoms and thus brought relief, but I find the entire concept of "personality disorder" problematic as it is shifting the blame - originally I was simply a person suffering with symptoms and great mental distress, after the diagnosis it became about me (my personality) being somewhat defective, me being "difficult," "dramatic," etc. Marsha Linehan also didn't appreciate the term and suggested "emotion dysregulation disorder" instead. Apparently BPD is also very much linked to C-PTSD lately (which would be helpful, as this concept focuses on the roots, not "personality" insufficiencies when it comes to analyzing distress and dysfunction). 2. I feel very much alone in becoming a MHC with a mental disorder (even personality disorder)! Even though I get a lot of positive feedback from my classmates about how my insight based on my history of mental illness is helpful and educating for them, I haven't found any established therapists who are forthcoming about personal mental health problems (especially regarding severe mental illnesses). It is still such a taboo subject - even though people with mental illness are exactly the ones who can help clarifying much of the confusion and mystery that revolves around certain diagnoses. Could MedCircle do an episode on therapists / psychiatrists / MHCs / etc. with personal histories of mental illness? Are there any support groups out there? Any "wounded healers?"

Kyle -- you are such a skilled interviewer -- and I so appreciate the work you are doing. You know how to ask a great question -- then listen -- not interrupt. You are the perfect person for this important job. Joe Laforsch

I was also misdiagnosed with Bipolar. I was misdiagnosed with Bipolar 2. It wasn't until I started seeing this amazing therapist, and the Psychiatrist of the place I attend therapy had diagnosed with me Borderline Personality Disorder. I am thankful that I have such supportive people around me that actually empathize and understand what I am going through. I have what is otherwise known as "Quiet" BPD

I got mine today. I knew it. I'm sad but also relieved and I need a hug. All the love to all of you bpd's. stay strong✨

I knew something was wrong and I researched different mental illnesses and I read bpd symptoms and I fit everyone of them. When I went to get diagnosed and they told me I actually burst into tears. It's a very hard life.

I remember that I was diagnosed with bipolar at 14 (despite the fact they aren’t supposed to diagnose it to those under 18) and getting told at 18 that I actually had BPD I got super mad at the new doctor with the correct diagnosis. It was unreasonable on my part. I went full denial. “No. It’s bipolar. That’s what they’ve told me. That’s what I’ve been treated and medicated for many years! Don’t just tell me that’s incorrect and it was all for nothing now!!!” Was my feelings then. But of course I couldn’t vocalize it then because I didn’t understand my feelings about it then and why I was angry. He tried to make me leave the room to tell my mother the diagnosis which made me a bit more upset but I refused to leave saying “I’m 18 now. I can stay in the room if I want now.” Thankfully I calmed down when he explained it to my mom.

I know someone that exhibits a lot of these characteristics.. it's so heartbreaking to watch them struggle with everyday things.. it is a vicious cycle. So proud of this young woman! You are strong and beautiful.. and well on your way to recovery! Continued good health to you! God bless you both.. and thank you for sharing your story with us.

Listening to you is like listening to my own thoughts out loud. It feels like a weight is lifted off my shoulders knowing there's at least someone out there that knows EXACTLY how I feel and me knowing they understand 🥺❤️

She is an important and strong person.

So sad the horrors some people experience. I’m glad she is finding peace, she’s working so hard. Kyle is so good as the interviewer in these videos. What amazing people

Sammy, THANK YOU so very very much for talking about this!! I’m 55 years old going through my 2017. I have just been diagnosed with BPD & CPTSD... after 38 years of trying to find a correct diagnosis. It’s hard but you inspire me!!!

Yes I was diagnose with bpd in 2018 and you have to be completely honest in order to get the proper treatment.

i was diagnosed a few weeks ago... without knowing. needless to say i was shocked! im so happy for everyone who finally found out the label that describes their struggles.

I started watching this channel about 5 months ago and 2 days ago I got my diagnosis for BPD. Thank you guys for the educational content❤️

Please do more on DID, CPTSD, and panic disorder

You have a great boyfriend! Thank you for being so brave to share so much with us. So helpful. Whish you all the best.

I notice she seems to be a bit nervous while talking about it. I'm the same way whenever I talk about myself.

I’m enjoying this series. It’s amazing Sammy figures it out herself .

Thank you for sharing your experience, Sammy.

Is it normal for people with BPD to have the same diagnosis reaction? Because I felt this exact same way, and I wanted to scream and cry but I was happy I found something

I got diagnosed with bpd after I experienced the worst major depressive episode of my life. I feel sorry for people who are stuck in that. It's really nothing like feeling down or blue. It's like been smothered by a lead blanket 24 hours a day

I've just had my life ruined by someone I loved for 13 years that I am now convinced has BPD. I have since had some very eye opening conversations with her family that showed me she had lied to me since the first time I met her. She convinced me they were horrible people and it was all a lie. The problem is we have 3 kids together and she is ruining their lives and teaching them to think and react like her. I need to find a way to get her to seek a diagnosis, but she thinks she is fine. I know inside she knows she isn't, but can't admit it. I can't let her ruins my kids lives like she did mine. How do you help them to seek therapy and accept what they are if they aren't there already.

This was very eye-opening. Very intriguing. Great job, Sammy. Love from your SamFam.

I was recently diagnosed with BPD and Major Depressive Disorder with Psychosis. I also ended up finding out for myself about this disorder and having that “AH-HA! Finally!” moment. This disorder is vicious and the damage it can cause is scary to anyone involved, ESPECIALLY the one suffering from it. The moment hits like when you pick up the fastest momentum riding a rollercoaster down its steepest slope and it doesn’t go away but you didn’t know it was there or expected it to last this long. Or you’re on fire and no amount of water can put it out but in reality you’re trying to put it out with gasoline. You sit there trying to dry the water from your skin but it keeps getting wet because you don’t know your hair is still soaked with water. Meanwhile you have no idea why it’s happening or who to go to about it because you don’t want to burden people with something you can’t even explain yourself. I had no clue what was going on. Where up or down was, why I couldn’t stop feeling pain after so many days. It doesn’t matter how many miles you walk, how many tasks you complete, or how many people talk or console you. You feel like you’re dying or not feeling at all. I do want to share a writing I did during a very dark moment so that people can understand what the thought process is during these times or know they aren’t alone. I’ve been dealing with feeling alone for a very long time. It was just a matter of when you want the help, which I’m currently doing at this point. But without the right help, it’s damn-near impossible to calm down someone who has this disorder. Here is the writing. It does have dark subject matter and offensive language so read at own risk. But this is what it’s like fighting with who you are without the proper help: Nose dive from the loft Where we left off Into the ground Being strong then so soft Standing beside myself lost Feeling no line I can't cross When I should stand behind it But I'm so blind with my eyes glossed From the poison of rage Blending all my days Can't hold onto a single thought In my chair dazed and crazed Should I keep on smoking Just blaze and blaze I'm not one who plays With your mental maze My velocity's climbing A downward declining Through the nasty hole Where thoughts have no silver lining Let's go even deeper Meet your sub-conscience reaper Who has the key to your cellar Grotesque rock bottom doorkeeper Who gladly unsealed the lock Opened the door when you dropped To relive every bad choice On the way to your fast stop Going passed that line You should have stayed behind But it's too late now Your home is the basement this time There's no chance of escaping My spirit is raped and I can hardly move All bound up, gagged and taped The smell of shit makes the nape Of my neck stand up straight But no way to move From this heightened and fucked up state This process should not be monotonous But with no inner cause it's because The claws when our path's crossed When I was lost and you held on Pull me right, then the left Straight up emotional theft Then throw the rope at my chest And say, "Go hang you instead" Starting to sink in the dirt In the basement beyond the Earth I need to pull myself out But I'm broken and too hurt Let it pull me under A much better slumber To drown in the basement Then let the rope do its number

Omg I want to cry with you! Everything your saying I feel like I can relate on many levels. For years and years I’ve only been diagnosed with depression.

Great interview hope she gets the best care

youre a real gentleman Kyle

Love Sammy & Brian ❤

I'm a poet too and with BPD, OCD, PTSD... and it is very irritating when my doctor judge me with my poems I hate it so muchh

It's a process we have to trust the process! Sammy your amazing keep shining bright beautiful! 💕#SamFam

"time to demonize a person" is what they think of these people. it shouldn't be in the cluster b cause you can have heightened empathy but kkkkkkkkkk

she's cool. smart. i think you got this girl. thanks for sharing your story.

At least they’re getting treatment and able to be treated vs wrecking relationships. It really does damage dating one but not as bad as a narcissist or antisocial personality. You’d never see those accept a personality disorder diagnoses. BPD is mostly formed in childhood so, don’t abuse your children that’s the most important thing.

Thank you Beautiful girl for sharing your story. 💜 I am so sorry your journey has been difficult, yet so graceful when sharing your story. I’m so happy you have answers.

Very helpful. You guys are heroes

Was also told I was bipolar and they threw medication at me and kicked me out. I'll never forgive the so called "psychiatrists". I had to self-diagnose. If there is a cultural revolution, the psychiatrists will have the same treatment as the billionaires and landlords.

When I was diagnosed with bpd I went on a mission to read and watch everything about bpd. I cant relate to anyone else's experience with bpd. I've been in treatment for bpd for 17 years and I've made zero progress. I feel more alone and angry since nothing makes me better. I even had to stop going to group because I was becoming more and more destructive to others in group that were making break throughs. Am I alone in this experience? I just want to relate to someone, anyone so I can for sure know what's wrong with me so I can become better.

Her 2017 is my 2020 :(

Honestly tho SAINT MARSHA dbt saved my life!!!!!! Samfam forever xoxoxo

I really need help understanding something that no one has yet known how to answer. I have full blown fabulous BPD 🙄... with paranoia, dissociation, and I have random psychotic episodes of various kinds.... They tell me its "transient stress related Psychosis" common in BPD..... Ok my damn question is... What is the difference with being diagnosed: BPD with Schizophrenic tendencies, BPD with Psychosis, BPD with psychotic features. 😑 They all kinda come across the same, but with different wording after BPD, so I'm super confused how they differentiate them. How do they know that maybe I have Schizophrenic tendencies and it's not transient stress related Psychosis. Or maybe I have psychotic features. I mean Psychosis isn't just hallucinations... It's delusions and other things too, aside from constant paranoia. Everyone just looks at me like 😳 when I make this point and ask... Like I've baffled them. But no answers. 😔 I'm also Bipolar... So in between those random episodes I'm dealing with crappy BPD. Then there's the question... Is it BPD stress related Psychosis, or am I Schizoaffective. 🤷🏻‍♀️ But, then wouldn't schizoaffective be Bipolar with Schizophrenic tendencies? Am I dealing with borderline Psychosis in between Bipolar episodes, or am I Schizoaffective? See, mind blowing...I think of this stuff and professionals are like 😳.

The Doctors did not have a clue. So they scramble and pretend they know. I ended up having to diagnose my ex-girlfriend though a process of elimination. Sadly she would not go to therapy, so the relationship ended. She was a comorbid Covert NPD. One of her dissociations was her "real self"; a beautiful person who I loved. But the sadist was dominant and destroyed the relationship.

very insightful!!! I'm trying to follow the meds- antipsychotic and a mood stabilizer so what was your associated. diagnosis...... DBT best treatment.... congrats and keep up the hard work

I was just diagnosed with BPD

very informative ❤

Can you have BPD under 18? I have 6 of the symptoms and I'm 13 so if anyone knows anything that would be helpful

So encourageing

Wow. Informative.

When I got diagnosed BPD I cried for 3 hours. Still can't get help in UK

Now I have went to multiple Physio therapist, after getting dissapointed I am diagnosing myself.

Really nice talking tbey are talking about

I say I have these problems but my doctor just ups my mood meds cause he thinks am just moody from my ocd but I have so much similar symptoms to this but I want a doctor to care enough to look at me same with adhd.

Just got diagnosed two weeks ago, I don't know what to do

What workbook did she buy off Amazon?

In one of her videos on her channel she tells her audience that she actually purposefully lies to her therapists so that she doesnt get hospitalized?

It also sounds like bipolar 2

is she is an actress or real patient?

Damn girls are awesome 😁

Is she implying Bipolar isn’t a significant illness? I have both BPD and Bipolar are they are both just as significant.

Ha fresh out of the drs office 😂

The one telltale sign of BPD......rage.

Sigh, everything has gotta be a disorder.. One day being a Genius is going to be a disorder... and they will treat it with stupify pills.

emdr and rem are very very different things.. 14:38