This should be in our public schools, doctor's offices, every university, where ever human beings are!! Sadly, many therapists even are not knowleadgeable about this work!!!! It is my life story. God bless you!!
My mother was viewing this wonderful, informative video with me and lost it when you pulled up Dean and Sam from Supernatural! She said she likes you now and wishes she could've attended your class where you talked about them.
Tell your mother I like her, too! I have used the Winchester family in a lot of examples in my teaching. They have such a rich mythology behind them and such clear intergenerational patterns. I'm glad you found the lecture helpful. :)
So how do you explain cut off in cases of pathogenic parenting, where it's not the person cut off causing anxiety but the third person is telling lies to cause the anxiety is never cut off?
Hi I just wanted to thank you for explaining this theory in such a clear, yet rich way. I'm a student in psychology and watching this was really helpful for my finals! Although, I have a question, why is the Cut-off a form of a high fusion ? in which way is it a fusion?
Hi Kate! Thank you for your comment and question. I apologize for not getting back to you sooner. Often, people think of cut-off and fusion as opposites because they think of cut-off as distance and fusion as closeness. From my perspective, fusion is about emotional reactivity--when people are fused to each other, they cannot separate their own emotions from others. If a relationship is so reactive that you need to completely separate (say, by moving away or not talking anymore), then that is a fused relationship. "Closeness" is about how connected people are to each other, fusion is about how reactive you are to each other. Cutting off is an emotional reaction. Hope this helps!
Hi Kate, sorry for the late reply but I hope it will still be helpful for you. I think of cut-off as a form of fusion because each person in a cut-off relationship is often still very reactive to the other, even if they don't have any form of direct interaction. Often, the fact that someone has to avoid all contact with another is a sign that it is an emotionally reactive, fused relationship. If we are not reactive to another person, we do not need to cut off from them. This is not mean to pathologize all forms of cut-off and I recognize that cut-off is sometimes necessary for safety.
Hello, I'm a SCWK student. Thank you for sharing your lecture with the public, this has been very helpful to me. Can you share with me what text you use in your course? I am wondering if it might be more helpful than the version my school uses.
Hi Rebecca, I use the book Extraordinary Relationships by Roberta Gilbert. Other classic texts I recommend are Bowen Family Systems Theory by Daniel Papero and Family Evaluation by Kerr & Bowen. There is a very approachable, self-help book based in Bowen's theory as well called Everything Isn't Terrible by Kathleen Smith.
@@ericae.hartwell9642 Terrific, Thank you for your response. I’ve taken note of them and am looking forward to getting myself a copy of each. Thank you so much! Happy Holidays to you.
Hi, I really appricate how you broke down Bowen's eight concepts. I wanted to know if you have any advice for a single person wanting to fuses Boweian Therapy and Cognative Behavior Therapy strategies to better understand themselves and how to navigate society while trying to figure out themselves. I don't have any background in counseling. I just really interested in understanding why i am the way i am.
Hi Jessica, I think that CBT techniques could be used to make changes based on a Bowen theory. For example, if you are able to identify some patterns you are stuck in in your relationship, or the common reactions you have when feeling threatened or stressed, you could use CBT techniques to practice changing those specific thoughts and behaviors.
I think all of us can certainly grow on our own using various methods (e.g., reading, attending workshops/seminars, journaling, talking with trusted others, etc.) but I also think that if you really want to work on yourself, it always helps to have a professional to support you through that process.
