My pregnancies were extremely different from each other and I had two girls😉❤️I personally do not think there is any correlation with gender. I think every pregnancy is different and people tend to attribute these differences to different genders if they have one of each. Of course I never carried a boy, BUT I've heard people attribute all kinds of symptoms to each of the genders.
Thank you for sharing your experience Melanie! 🍀Her life circumstances where also completely different.. having a toddler during a second pregnancy..renovating a house... causes definitely more stress and probably also affects the pregnancy. So I would agree with you not to see a correlation with the sex of the baby. There are so many more factors that need to be looked at.
It’s also worth noting that pregnant people see a huge diversity of symptoms pregnancy to pregnancy even with the same sex - it’s not necessarily about the sex of the baby and some of this odd rhetoric about girl babies “stealing their mother’s beauty” seems like a bizarre gendered thing to place on an unborn child…
I think the lack of sleep with a second pregnancy is the killer that drains anything but bare survival. Caring for a baby while you grow a baby tips the stress bucket over. Hugs!
as someone with a birthday on December 24, the fairy lights definitely make my birthday feel more magical. Hope the rest of your pregnancy goes safe and well 💚🧡
Almost 10 years it's unbelievable! I've been watching your videos for probably more than five already ! It's so wild! I'd literally learned English with you, graduated, survived pandemic and now in med school ! As always you're such a lovely person and a great person to learn from ! Hope that this time around everything will be easy till the end and birth will go as planned!!! Stay happy and healthy 💚
It's crazy how time flies by ! I was around 18 years old when I discovered your channel, now I'm 25 and expecting my first baby due for beginning of next year ☺️ Very different stages of life 💚💚
So refreshing to hear your honest accounts. I followed along your first pregnancy while I was going through a horrendous pregnancy myself and couldn’t relate to your first experience. Love how balanced your perspective is now although hate that you’ve had such a rough time!!
Something that not a lot of people note except for those who have had multiple children biologically is that each pregnancy *tends* to be harder on the carrier (including moods). So what's interesting to me is that your first pregnancy with your son you were feeling brighter but that could be due to it being your first and also, you were in peak mental and physical health prior to becoming pregnant. So from that perspective, I think it's far more those factors than sex 😅 *edit*: just because I was interested, I asked family members about their pregnancies and there doesn't even appear to be a correlation. It seems like some people biologically have more difficult pregnancies especially older. Also with gender, people see what they want to see (the whole younger female 'stealing' the older female's beauty is classic sexism at its finest even in-utero.) Fascinating!
I DEFINITELY thought the first would be harder as I had never been through it before! For example, this third trimester has been easier because I’ve been here before … there were also certain horribleeee symptoms that I didn’t have this time! But having such bad nausea, and then prenatal depression, those are the two main things that have made this one harder! And as I said in the video there are sooo many factors that contributed to this one being harder to manage - a big one: running around after a toddler all day! Also home reno stress, health entry point being so different, definitely not all about the sex of each baby! BUT I know that so many people do experience (for example) worse nausea & depression on their boys or girls 💚
I’ve been following you for a good 4 years and I’m 20 right now, so I learnt a lot about mental and physical health and just adjusting to an ever changing world from you and I’m extremely grateful for that 💚
mel I can't tell you how much I appreciate you sharing your pregnancy experiences...it makes me even more excited for when I have my own kids, and also it's nice to know what to expect! xx
This felt more vulnerable than other videos of yours. Always appreciate your honesty. I'm so sorry you've had such bad mental health during this pregnancy and the insomnia. Pregnancy is no joke!!! You are strong and brave. My mother's second birth (me) was incredibly easy. Hope that's the case for you.
I love these updates! I started watching you 7 years ago when starting undergrad and coming into my bisexuality. Now I’m a med student wanting to be an OBGYN and just got a place with my partner so I’m loving this house and pregnancy content! Parenting content is great to watch too, my partner and I aren’t sure if we want kids but it’s very handy if we decide yes and we have nephews and nieces it can apply to💚
Loved this Melanie, I’m 18 and definitely want kids in the future. Always learn so much from these videos. Us women are definitely let down by the educational system 😅
Oh I’d say you are 100% correct! I’m just comparing pregnancies by comparing boy vs girl because I’m thinking of them that way (instead of first and second!) and only really because everyone in my life told me that if I had a girl the pregnancy would be tougher … people guessed I was having a boy last time simply based on my symptoms! Thought it was silly then, but there’s something to be listened to in the wisdom/experiences of people who have had many kids! Xxx
💚💚💚 I've been watching your video's since my first year of college so since I was 18-19 years old and I'm now 24! I'm nowhere near having a baby on my own but I've been loving watching every single video you've been making and I look up to you like to a big sister. You inspire me and your life inspires what I want my future to be. 😊 I wish you all the best on the rest of your pregnancy! 💚
I think I've been here for about 7 years, I'll be going on 22 in the new year, basically grew up with your videos! Best of luck with the birth and remainder of the pregnancy🍀 💚
Melanie I think you are going to help so many women with how open and honest you are in this video! I'm so sorry your doctor said that comment to you about the carbs. People can be so insensitive and unthinking. I also suffered from body dysmorphia with my 2nd - from being completely neutral about my weight gain with my first. I gained more weight, and faster, the 2nd time around...and it was harder to lose weight after giving birth to my 2nd baby. But I tried to be kind to myself. It isn't an easy road. It goes up and down. You are doing great
💚💚💚been following you since the beginning and you’re still my favorite! I absolutely love how genuine you are and everything you share. Especially your mommy content! I’m so so happy for you Mel! You inspire me!
these videos are so educational thank you! your last series helped me a lot to understand one of my family members better during her pregnancy 🫶🏻 and sidenote but you always remind me of someone straight out of a novel or something you're so pretty 🥺
I can’t remember how long I’ve been watching but it’s at least 6 years, probably 7 years. It’s been a joy watching your journey and I’m so happy for you and your family 💚
💚 it must be over 5 years at this point! I'm not planning on having children but your videos are always very comforting to me and I enjoy your pregnancy videos nonetheless. Glad the pregnancy is getting easier for you now!
I've got two boys and each pregnancy was completely different. My first son I had salty savoury cravings, felt sick and put on little weight. With my second son was sweet sugary stuff. I ate what I felt like but tried to moderate and combine with healthy foods too. I also had a miscarriage with my very first pregnancy (before my sons) and I was paranoid at only eating very good foods, keeping active and going to bed early, no treats that could cause any problems. Even when looking after yourself to the book sometimes just doesn't work either. So for those that may feel guilty about eating treats etc, it's a good thing. Balance is key.
I love watching your videos Melanie, they're such a comfort watch 🥰 thanks for always being so open and honest! I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes well for you 💛
So exciting and interesting how different the two pregnancies have been for you! 💚 Can't wait to see how birth goes and to hear if baby sister looks like her brother :)
Loved this video! I started watching you about 3 years ago. I first learned about you when you did that collab video with Hannah on being single vs being in a relationship. I love putting your videos on while I work. They're so long form and easy going that it's such nice background entertainment. Good luck with the last bit of your pregnancy. Wishing you nothing but the best! 💚
I'm 26 and have no clue if I want kids, teetering between 'yes' and 'no' over the years but lately more on the 'no' side but still curious and love to learn from you and Hannah Witton. I've been watching for 6-7 years now! First found you when I was discovering my queerness :D wishing you good health and smooth rest of pregnancy and happy birth! 💚
I had a girl last time and now we’re expecting a boy! I have a much easier pregnancy now. I didn’t have nausea with my girl, but this time I did. I was a lot more emotional with my girl, this time I feel very leveled. I craved chocolate with my girl and fruit now. Also I gained soo much weight with my girl and so far not as much as I had with her at this point. I had TERRIBLE HORRIBLE heartburn with my girl and this time very little, thankfully!! 🎉 I feel so lucky that I feel so much better in general. ❤
Been following you since 2016, you have been a huge inspiration and a window into well functioning family 💚💚💚 stay strong and best of health for all of you!
I’m currently 19 weeks pregnant with my third child (I have a girl and a boy already), and my pregnancies have gotten progressively tougher each time! I’ve had nausea and fatigue on all of them but it’s been worse with each subsequent pregnancy and I think it’s a combination of being a bit older and having another child/children to take care of! I have had two completely different births (first was looonnng and traumatic, second was really fast and unexpected, I’m planning a home birth for my third and cannot wait!) looking forward to see how everything works out for you this time and thanks for all of your honesty! ❤️
Girl first - easy preg I’d say, boy second - again easier preg despite older and less fit and tired! Both labours vag and fine - but no 2 slightly lazier and had to have little induction drip. But slightly quicker yep! 2nd degree year with no 1, less tearing with no 2. One thing I had with both though was awful perinatal depression around 4-7 months - debilitating and making me feel almost suicidal- it was awful. But cleared up after time/medication. Just the blues with both too… suppose a past /present ish history of mental health issues kind of meant these illnesses may have arisen at such hormonally charged times in a woman’s life! I love pregnancy - I feel blessed and forever changed.
I´m here for 3 years 💚💚💚 I don´t have kids yet and I want them in the future, but I´m terrified of labor. Have huge anxiety and was very afraid of watching your first labor vlog. But I trust what you said, that it´s worth it.
My pregnancies were very different from each other: With my boy I had really bad acne and prenatal depression, but I didn't have any nausea. The birth was complicated and traumatic, but postpartum was a wonderful time. With my girl I had beautiful skin and no depression, but giiiirl was I sick! The birth was SO quick and easy, but unfortunately I had postpartum depression and anxiety. Two days ago I found out that I'm pregnant with baby number 3, so I'm really excited what it's gonna be like this time around 🤭
You really make me changing my mind everytime on having a baby. I guess it will be time soon. I love your videos. You are the only one I like to listen to just talking and not having any vlog related content. Oh and 💚
💚 I've been watching you since almost the beginning (several years now), I'm no where near the age of having children but I love seeing how much your life has been blossoming and I'm so excited for you Melanie 🥺🥰
Thank you so much for doing this video ❤️😊... Am currently pregnant with my second and I can so relate to every thing that you've mentioned, the tiredness, the mood swings, not being able to look after yourself etc. I feel extreme pelvic pressure this time around since I had a 3rd degree tear during the first delivery 😢. Although I know it, feels good to be reminded that am not the only one going through this phase at the moment. Sending lots of love, hugs and positive vibes your way 💕💕
I was really scared of having a C Section but because my induction didn’t work, my little girl was born earlier this year by emergency C Section and I had a really lovely experience. The team were amazing and made sure we were really well informed every step of the way. Even though the recovery wasn’t what I’d hoped for, I’d be happy to have a c section with my next baby!
I’m currently almost done with my first trimester with my second. First was a boy and I don’t know about this one yet. But MY GOD, the exhaustion and nausea is just SOOOOOO much more intense this time around. I can’t function daily. I don’t remember it being this bad last time. However my mental health is definitely better this time, mainly because I have consistent therapy and support that I did not have last time. Also having a toddler makes things so much harder, and I have already been diagnosed super early with gestational diabetes. 😢 It’s interesting how similar our physical symptoms seem. I wonder if this is a girl? Haha. I’ll find out soon! Thank you for this video!!!!
I struggled with my stretch marks I didn't get them until my last week and then they all appeared on my tummy and surprisingly my thighs too. They did fade after a year or so but the ones on my thighs you can still tell they're there really. I also gained 35lb when I was pregnant and I was all belly so that's probably why I got my stretch marks at the end. I found loosing weight difficult too. It was a very difficult time for me and I was going through so much. I'd definitely recommend talking, don't keep it all inside.
My first birth (my son) was similar to yours, forceps delivery lost a lot of blood and gave me the fear of birth for years afterwards. My second birth (my daughter) was amazing, water birth with only gas and air and it was just so so nice, I would do it a million times over again. I was very sick in my pregnancy with my son, every day all day being sick, I had hypremesis and needed medication to stop it throughout pregnancy whereas I was sick once or twice with my daughter but was very emotional, cried a lot!! I hope you get the birth you want second time round, just know it can happen and can be the most amazing experience! 💚
Thank you for sharing this! I always wanted to be a mother and even though it is not gonna be on the table for a few years yet I love watching you opening up about the reality of it. I learn so much from videos like this one. 💚💚💚
So excited for you to have your little christmas baby! 💚 (since high school, im now 24) ive said it before but watching you grow gives me hope for my future ☺️
What a lovely real video x I had no 1 pre lockdown and no 2 in lockdown - I know where you’re coming from, it made the pregnancy and mat leave a lot less pressured! Yep 1 to 2 is a new learning curve, but as the kiddies get to be able to play and communicate together, it changes and becomes slightly easier? In a different way! You’re gorgeous and you’ll be fine x enjoy last stretch of the pregnancy babe!
As always thank you for sharing your honest impressions! I've been following you for around 8 years now and I just love to see the place where you are at and all the things you've achieved! I'm a bit younger so not really thinking about pregnancy yet (nor in the near future I think) but it's really interesting to see you experience it. Greetings from Spain! 💚
I'm currently 39 weeks with my first bubba and I found this very interesting, thank you! Hoping for the best of births for the both of us, we've got this 💕💚
I'm watching your channel since 2013 you sometimes feel like somewhat of a big sister I can learn from (I have 3 younger brothers) and I'm so happy seeing you and your family grow 💚
As someone who had an elective c-section I feel the opposite way to you - a vaginal delivery is my worst fear ! I think people have this view of c-sections bc most of what they know of them is from emergency c-sections, which ofc are gna be higher risk & more chaotic & frightening bc they're in a rush & the baby or the mother are in distress. But when it's planned it's so much more calm ! Being able to schedule the birth in for a specific date & having the time to go over the whole process in depth with the hospital staff so you know exactly what to expect, & then during the actual procedure just lying there with your birth partner with you, waiting for only about half an hour in all, to have your baby there skin to skin on your chest the whole time they're stitching you back up (all completely painlessly too !), it's just such a relief to have all (or most of) the uncertainty removed !
Mine was classed as emergency, but it wasnt an emergency emergency, ie it wasnt rushed or under general or anything, they just preferred to get it done that day. I found it fine if a bit surreal. but the aftermath and recovery I found absolutely horrific!
@@kellyh3295 I hear a lot of ppl say that the recovery is horrific ! I can't really speak to that experience as my recovery was unfortunately going to be horrific regardless of my delivery method bc I'd already been made very physically disabled by the pregnancy, so I didn't know which bits were horrific specifically because of the c-section lol so I guess that made it feel not as bad in a way ?? :')
You have brightened my weeks since 2019 - a heartfelt thank you for that💚 I will always remember binging your videos the days after I had my first date with my boyfriend. We will move in together in 5 weeks!💚
💚 on my first pregnancy and been watching you since 2010 and I'm so happy for you 💚💚. Also my husband and I are contemplating (seriously) moving to Ireland in the next five years or so haha
In all honesty I think the criticism you are getting for framing it boy vs girl is something you should accept. Should people not take everything so seriously, absolutely, but it's just unscientific and biased and your opinion. If something rubs a lot of people the wrong way, maybe consider if it was necessary instead of doubling down on Instagram that it's true in your echo chamber so you can't be critiqued.
It was only a couple of comments and messages so an extreme minority. I didn’t say anything about science in this video, it’s a video about my experience & I know a lot of people have a similar experience.
@@melaniemurphyofficial I understand it's not what you meant but you defended yourself against people saying, they feel you giving girls a bad hand by saying, it's my experience but people around me and online think the same. So for the viewers that thought you implied girls were more difficult, you just confirmed it again. I don't think you have to interact with any of these comments, including mine, just maybe consider if the title was the best choice in todays social climate. Also I didn't read all comments, just when I scrolled by some of the those comments popped up, might just have been bad timing.
I can't thank you enough for these videos as someone who wants kids 💚 I'm always super interested by everything you say, and I love how honest you are! My mom had a girl (me) and a boy, and just like you, it was apparently much easier for her when she was pregnant with my brother. Also, about the C-section, she says she actually preferred it (she had to get it for my brother) because it was quick and easy and way less traumatic than my birth. So I guess it really depends on the person/the situation! I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes well, I'm sending you lots of good vibes! ☀
Not sure how long I've been here... Ever since the pandemic started I feel like each year blurs into the others 😂 But at least since 2018! Lovely video as always and so excited for you guys to meet your baby girl :)💚
telling a pregnant woman ''go easy on the carbs''??? telling anyone that?? wtf is wrong with some doctors honestly! I'm glad you've been in recovery for a while and you could recognize the BS!
How is this wrong? It’s just an advice. If I’d gain 40-50 pounds during my pregnancy, I’d sure as hell want someone setting me straight instead of being unhealthy. It’s no different than telling a diabetic to go easy on sugar, I had this told to me during my pregnancy and I’m glad I did. This is literally the JOB of a doctor.
You've clearly never been pregnant. Most people don't want to gain a crap ton of weight and get gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, giant stretchmarks everywhere and then have a hard time getting used to an overweight body (and potentially getting body dismorphia), which is generally harder to carry and puts strain on the pelvic floor. Also, reducing carbs is a way to reduce swelling - a lot of pregnant women have problems with edema
@@passingby8394 Respectfully, that’s not how we are trained anymore (at least in the US). Currently a second year MD student, and previously medicine has been very paternalistic but now it’s shifting to patient centered care which is what medical schools are teaching the new generation. The previous approach fosters distrust in physicians and undermines the importance of patient autonomy. Also, schools now are teaching trauma informed care. Saying this to someone who has a history of an ED is an example of what NOT to do when practicing trauma informed or patient centered care. Also, you’re supposed to work with your patient, not instruct them. Saying something encouraging healthier food choices instead of “go easy on the carbs” when carbs are essential to people living is not the way to go and doesn’t consider any reasons why the patient is gaining the amount where it’s a risk factor for complications. You want the patient to have intrinsic motivation so they make it a lifestyle choice, not because the physician chastised them. Extrinsic motivation doesn’t cause long lasting habits!
@@passingby8394 You inform the patient of risks that could happen if they do continue to gain the weight so that they are aware of the information and work with them if they have barriers to losing weight or eating more healthy. And if they don’t want to do either, that’s their decision and patient autonomy is to be respected. Hope this cleared it up.
@@passingby8394 my issue with her comment is that not all carbs are created equal, I ate plenty of carbs when I was super healthy and fit! It’s more-so just the demonisation of one particular food group that can have a really negative impact on people with EDs or a history of EDs xxx
I'm due with my first kid next Sunday. It's a boy and I do feel kind of guilty to talk about my pregnancy whenever someone asks, because it was kind of a breeze. I had a scare with early on bleeding and a marker in my blood tests, but everything turned out okay. The 'worst' thing were my ligaments pains, but even there my gyno perscribed some magnesium and it went away within days. Considering I'm over 30 I did expect a much worse experience. Never once felt sick, no mood swings, no other pains etc. Now at almost 39 weeks it is tiring, but pretty much everyone feels this way, so nothing out of ordinary. All I can hope for is that my experience with birth is as positive as with pregnancy, but then again I would hate sounding like one of these moms who talk about how the pregnancy was the most beautiful time & to set unrealistic expectations. I think some pregnancies are just easier& we're lucky and some are harder and all experiences are valid and important to be shared.
One smallie here at the moment and hoping for a 2nd very soon! 💚 Also 💚 for being here for many years now. I wish there was a way to check when you subscribed to channels. I'd love to know exactly how long I've been watchin :)
Gaining weight has nothing to do with developing pre-eclampsia. Just for anyone that is feeling vulnerable. Nor does gestational diabetes. Even an underweight pregnancy would be at risk of developing both those pregnancy conditions.
Not according to literally every health service in the world. From the NHS: www.nhs.uk/pregnancy/related-conditions/common-symptoms/weight-gain/ (just because you can develop these things even if you don’t gain a lot of weight, gaining a lot of weight still significantly increases your risk)
💚! My birth story: with my girl Vivian my water broke at 11:40pm at 39 weeks. It was a slow labor, she was born at 6pm. I had an epidural which didn't work but other than that it was okay just tiring because of the time and I never ate anything since dinner the previous day. That first meal after birth though!! Yeees. With my son Jack, I had contractions after 40 weeks. We went into the hospital at 4am and he was born at 9am. I made sure to eat a little! The hardest part was that he was at an awkward angle and I guess his head and shoulder were stuck slightly but I was very determined! Because again epidural didn't work, I could feel everything and was very aware but he came out muuuuuch faster than my daughter but it was much more painful. I was shaking so long immediately after he was born from adrenaline and didn't immediately hold him because I was just in a different mind. He came out very bruised and battered because of how fast and furious it was! My recovery with him was very easy VERY Easy. I ended up with some post Postpartum depression afterwards and it took a while for me to feel a good connection, which I never expected. Now I have a 4 year old and 19 month old and all is chaoticlly well!
I really dislike the notion that we have to feel grateful for being pregnant all the time or almost apologise for moaning. We can still be depressed or heartbroken or fed up and not apologise because some people have cancer. Pregnancy is bloody hard, so is parenting. I struggled for years with fertility issues and am now pregnant with my fifth while doing long distance most of the time with a military husband & no support network, they’re two separate situations and one doesn’t make the suffering of the others any less. I have a 2 year old who doesn’t sleep and hits constantly (girl) and a teenager who is furious about everything (my other girl… boys are a lot easier in my experience 🙈🤣) and I feel the need to preface any complaint with ‘I love my children so much, please don’t think I don’t…’ Sometimes things are just difficult, and I’m glad you’ve shown that side because my 4th pregnancy was my first dreadful one and there was hardly anyone online talking about that ♥️
Hi Melanie! I have 2 boys. My first was an emergency c-section and I had an unmedicated VBAC for my second. I know you're scared about the c-section, I was too since it was definitely not the plan, but the recovery wasn't that bad. I know it differs person to person, but I was able to walk around a few hours after the surgery. I think that was key to not getting too sore and maintaining mobility. My recovery for both births were very quick and relatively easy so I hope that eases your mind a little. Fingers crossed you get your ideal birth scenario ❤
Most people who have planned c-sections seem to have pretty good experiences and a relatively calm experience and easy time healing. The healing from a third or fourth degree tear and forceps sounds equally as difficult to be honest!
It apparently is, but the worst thing was the blood loss, the feeling that brought! Intervention on second births is very low, baby is measuring average in size and haemorrhage risk is much higher with a section which is why I want to take my chances! Only after the hospital staff told me the risks & that I’m perfectly okay to go for a vaginal delivery. I think if they were very concerned they would heavily encourage a planned section xxx
My mum said that I (2nd child girl) "destroyed her body" she had a large tear that the doctor's botched so I'd blame them more for that one. I was around 4-4,5kg with very short white/blond hair and my older sister was tiny with very long almost black hair(now blond too). From stories I've heard it seems like the second pregnancy in general is harder but labour is easier
You are an amazing woman and an amazing mother melanie you are always glowing i hope you and all your family are all doing well love you melanie you and your family are always amazing
I'm exactly the same weeks into pregnancy as you are. With a girl as well. And it's been a very difficult pregnancy also unfortunately. I'm so excited we're almost to the finish line!
Hi Mel, my fellow cailin (fadas don't come up on my phone and I have irish named nephews 🤭). I had 2 girl pregnancies and had to have sections for both due to a heart complication during pregnancy. To be honest, I felt like I cheated motherhood because they were so easy, special and the recovery was so easy. Except for laughing!! That hurt. Also avoid getting a cough or sneezing. But that's probably the sane with a tear. We tried for our babies for 4 years and I had a keyhole procedure to check my tubes. Recovery from that was so hard that I dreaded the section. However, I was off pain medication by day 4 and day 2 and 3 was just paracetamol. Stupidly I was hoovering by day 7 but second time round, I made sure to take it easy. Having baby number 2 is so different in the sense that there's no transition to motherhood. It feels even more cosy because it's not overwhelming..... Til you get home 😆. Having 2 is absolutely well worth it. Admittedly I struggled a lot and felt overwhelmed for a good 18 months to 2 years but it's worth it seeing them together. Your heart will melt. Two things..... 1) he's going to suddenly look massive, the first time you see him once she's here and 2) try to soak in the hospital time as much as possible. You'll be dying to be all together but those few hours /days will be like being in a hotel plus will be your main time to just be the 3 of you. It's hard leaving your first little baby at home but you'll never get that time back either. Best of luck and you look as gorgeous as always. Irish love from Munich ☘️
I had two boys 7.5 years apart (also from different dad’s) and lots was different… some things were the same like spiky nipples, morning sickness, and hypoglycemia. Haha I was happier and calmer than usual during both. 💚
I have been following you for a few years now while living in London and it's so strange listening to you now i am in Dublin. Plus i keep remembering some things you mentioned in random videos that i am going back to now as they have a different meaning :) plus i am pregnant again with my second, again just a few months later then you (my son is 20 months) and it's just so helpful to hear your views on it. Especially as i am more scared now than in my first pregnancy which is a bit strange. Good luck with the last push and also with home reno!
💚 It has been such a magical experience watching the things that you share and seeing how much you and your beautiful family has grown, thank you for sharing this with us 🥰
I had my son by emergency c-section. I would have had a planned c-section but my water broke a day before. I ended up going into labour very quickly and was dilated to 4 cm by the time i had the c-section. It was wild but wonderful at the same time and i would do it exactly the same with my next if i could. My recovery was easy and i felt fine after about 5 days. My son is healthy and happy and so am I
I think a big part of the issue is that it comes across like you are defining your children by their gender by implying that your pregnancies have been different BECAUSE of their sex and nothing else. You have talked a lot in other videos too about how having a girl will be so different from having a boy; perhaps your defensiveness towards the feedback you've gotten on this video is because subconsciously (or maybe consciously) you're already thinking about your girl very differently before she is born. Not a criticism, just an observation. I'd likely be the same, but I'm not speaking about it online for all to critique after spending years presenting oneself as very open minded with exemplary growth mindset and having a reputation for always backing up statements with evidence x
I’m just really not sure what I said in this video that requires ‘evidence’ … I’m simply sharing my experience. Made a joke or two about common myths. And to be honest, yes I am thinking about my children differently, because boys and girls have completely different life experiences. To deny the extremely difficult experience of growing up in this world as a girl - to me - is utterly silly. To pretend that the world won’t treat my son and my daughter differently would be to live in fantasy land. All I can do as a mother is to love them both hard and to do my best to teach them to be kind, resilient people. Before I had my son I genuinely didn’t know what I was talking about when I talked about kids, it’s nothing to do with me being more ‘close minded’, I’ve witnessed in him, his friends, his cousins, biological differences. Boys and girls are the same in many many ways when they are younger of COURSE but to me it’s a very strange thing, this insistence that we are all the exact same … don’t have different needs, different biology. It’s utter bollocks. Even when it comes to trans rights. If bio sex didn’t exist, nobody would be trans, because we’d all be the same. I can’t wrap my head around it! Anyway … I called this video what I called it after editing it and I’m happy with the title because it reflects how I mostly spoke in the video, I’m clearly primarily thinking of my pregnancies in relation to the sex of each baby and literally so what? I tried very hard to use terms like ‘first and second pregnancy’ but as I explained on Instagram that felt weird because in the back of my own head I still count my miscarriage even though ONLINE this is my second pregnancy. There are too many layers there to even go into so I’m presenting the chat I’m having in a way that’s honest about the video content. If people like to think of babies as sexless blobs they truly don’t need to click on a video like this. I experienced the same few negative comments about finding out the sex this time … zero regrets. It’s helped me hugely to bond with my baby ahead of birth.
@@melaniemurphyofficial I think it's because whether you intended it to or not, this video implies that you think the differences in your symptoms are due to your baby's sex. Then this is backed up by your comments about the experience of your friends/family (subjective rather than fact based) which contradicts you saying you're not making this generalisation. Pregnancy is always going to be a sensitive topic for some people. I'm personally not offended by this video or the way you speak about your children, I'm just hopeful you'll see why others might be xx
@@melaniemurphyofficial You say make a joke or two about common myths but then at the start of this video contradict this and state how many of the myths you never believed in have been "it" so you are in fact saying that you believe in a lot of these gender based sweeping generalisations. This all just seems like you doubling down and contradicting yourself instead of admitting you got it wrong.
