Breaking Free from Codependency with Melody Beattie | The Mark Groves Podcast

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Themes: Codependency, Addiction, Relationships, Boundaries, Technology, Social Media, Spirituality, Self- Love, Healing, Authenticity, Belonging, Transformation, Mental Health, Grief
Summary:
Today I am jamming with self-help pioneer, Melody Beattie! Melody is the author of many bestselling books-including The Language of Letting Go, Playing It by Heart, The Grief Club, Beyond Codependency, and The Codependent No More Workbook. In 2009, Codependent No More was named one of the four essential self-help books of all time by Newsweek.
Melody Beattie’s compassionate and insightful look into codependency-the concept of losing oneself in the name of helping another-has guided millions toward the understanding that they are powerless to change anyone but themselves and that caring for the self is where healing begins. Join us today as we jam about the ins and outs of codependency in relationships, the challenges faced by those stuck in addictive or enabling cycles, the importance of setting boundaries, and how to break free.
Discover:
* Melody's incredible journey of overcoming codependency and how she turned her life around, finding freedom and happiness along the way
* What codependency actually means, and how people can unknowingly fall into its trap
* The importance of setting boundaries with technology and social media, and why connecting with real people is where it's at for our well-being
* Tips and tricks to break free from addictive and enabling cycles, empowering yourself to make positive changes and embark on a journey of personal growth and healing
00:00 Intro
00:33 The fine line between being human and a codependent
04:06 How writing ‘Codependent No More’ saved her life
12:31 The role of men and women in relationships
17:58 Healing the division
24:00 Choose your own circumstance
28:21 Boundaries for tech and social media
32:42 Unveiling collective codependency
38:02 Trauma reflecting in present-day anxiety
40:22 How to break free
46:38 Learn to love yourself unconditionally
49:26 There’s nothing human about technology
Links:
* Book: Codependent No More (2022 updated edition!) melodybeattie.com/books/codep...
* Website: melodybeattie.com/
Sponsors:
* Cured Nutrition | Use code CREATETHELOVE for 20% off all products at www.curednutrition.com/createt...
* Create the Love Cards | Use code CTLCARDS15 for 15% off at createthelove.com/cards

Опубликовано:

7 июн 2024

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Комментарии : 102

@dianapaloma3102 5 месяцев назад

Woah - I love that unconditional love doesn’t mean unconditional tolerance. Thank you both. Thank you Melanie for being there during some of my darkest times years ago with your book. 🙏❤️

@freebee9172 8 месяцев назад

I learned so much from this video one of them being disappointed from life is what it's called the dark night of the soul

@Yay_you 6 месяцев назад

I myself realized yes I'm a co-dependant, but realized too I got manipulated into relationships with narcissistic sociopaths who used me, prayed on my empathy to help them, and then so much focus had to be on them I didn't exist anymore.

@markgroves 5 месяцев назад

At the core of codependency is the lack of a self -- and that self worth is sourced from helping and supporting others. A powerful shift is to see yourself as the main character in your life. This isn't selfish, it's necessary!

@Yay_you 2 месяца назад

@@markgroves ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥🙏🏽

@susantalebzadeh9741 2 месяца назад

Absolutely! That was my experience! I got out. My mother is an alcoholic shell of herself in order to tolerate him. And in living such a life she has become increasingly pathological herself.

@p_tiffanii Год назад

I listened to the audio book a few years, ago. Anyone struggling with relationships should read her book. Especially, if you grew up with/around addicts.

@andziagreen4922 2 месяца назад

I got the book and reading

@TerriLynch 8 месяцев назад

My daughter just gave me this book yesterday . It was in her rehab and she said it helped her so she passed it in to me.❤

@Allearsandeyes57 29 дней назад

This is a great conversation, so honest and real. Rediscovering my own deep rooted codependency, went underground for years, and resurfaced in a situation that was innocent and well meaning, a “once lover”, turned “friend”, holding on , realizing how afraid I am, fear of abandonment and rejection. My friend kicked alcohol 20 years ago, but wrestled w his own monsters… well, you know he patterns. THANK YOU p, both, for your work❣️

@marc2345 9 месяцев назад

I love what you both share. Thank you!! Taking responsibility on my contribution to how I react in all that goes on in my life has made living so much more meaningful and satisfying💜❤💖

@viccinagli3874 Год назад

Thank you Melody and Mark. I love your books. They've helped me and others endlessly over the years xx god bless xx ❤

@DelSunflower33 9 месяцев назад

Amazing wise woman

@lifeafternarcissism 8 месяцев назад

Yes she is ❤

@vonniemichelle3670 6 месяцев назад

Why do I want back in the pot? Good god, how do we break these patterns? 🙈

@bonnieramirez4701 7 месяцев назад

She is amazing ❤

@cathyjennings5580 3 месяца назад

Live to be inquisitive!!! Not curious attitude. Rather CHOOSE TO BE inquisitive & research GOOD POSSIBILITIES !!!

@BiggusDickus2 2 месяца назад

This is in my top 5 books that have changed my life. I learn something new every time I listen to it. It's like seeing the sun with brand new eyes.

@donaldbraugh2314 9 месяцев назад

"...When we're ready to do the deep work..". She definitively allowed herself to go through these levels (read her books 📚 ), yet I think when you're following the Creator, you go through it whether you're ready or ready - not, as the 12 step prayer by Reinhold states . Thy will not nine be done. But she has made a valid point, if not a genuine one

@divineverse7122 4 месяца назад

God bless Mark. This is an incredible interview. Through God all things are possible.💜🙏🏼

@erin3291 Год назад

amazing lady! amazing interview ..thanks Mark & Melody …lifesaving info 💞🙏🏻

@karmenchristensen9845 Год назад

Have just started watching. I can tell already this is meant for me!

@thewillowtree1127 9 месяцев назад

Great interview!!! Much love to you both. I am a new subscriber, so glad that I found you!!

@andrewgross1758 9 месяцев назад

Interesting but was expecting more on codependency.

@sherrycheek6768 7 месяцев назад

I have been a huge fan of Melody Beattie and have read many of her books. Very disappointing to hear judgements on political people woven into this talk. All with a smirk. How does that help the codependent who still suffers?

@gooseylou2 2 месяца назад

Absolutely takes away from the sincerity of it. It makes them look so incompetent.

@dianapaloma3102 5 месяцев назад

Thank you 🙏❤️

@iw9338 4 месяца назад

Thanks very much 😊

@juliettespoon 6 месяцев назад

Wow great video thank you

@debbiehorner5973 4 месяца назад

Was looking forward to wise words on codependency, which there was, then got off track.

@gooseylou2 2 месяца назад

I relied on this book codependent no more for many years many years ago. I didn’t start healing until I was able to recognize narcissistic personality disorder. Her book was no help. In fact, it made things worse. It keeps you stuck. It keeps you confused it keeps you thinking that you can do something about it. It keeps you blaming yourself. Such a great injustice. Once you understand, narcissistic personality disorder, you will see codependent no more just creates more confusion.

@josephashenofsky8266 3 месяца назад

Awesome job with this one

@dianapaloma3102 5 месяцев назад

We can not control people or make everything ok. So true and so painful. My mom had a stroke and I’m struggling because I can’t make it ok. I’m open to suggestions. I know I’m letting it take me down.

@markgroves 5 месяцев назад

It's hard to not wish for things to be different when they're incredibly challenging. Sending you love as you navigate this. Look for how you could ask for support, and what you need to hold everything you're holding ❤

@orfi73 4 месяца назад

Give your pain to God and you ll be OK.

@dianapaloma3102 4 месяца назад

Thank you 🙏❤️

@dianapaloma3102 4 месяца назад

Thank you 🙏❤️

@dianapaloma3102 4 месяца назад

Thank you 🙏❤️

@desireeanne916 11 месяцев назад

I dont understand why this has become political. Why? I didnt come here to talk about Trump. Dont use him as an example of whats going on in our lives today. I mean WTF! I came here to understand my life, no one else!

@markgroves 11 месяцев назад

Yeah a lot of people use him as an example. I hear you on this, and yet, for others this is their way of demonstrating a point. Whether it's left or right you see this being brought into lots of conversations. The moralization of political positions is rampant!

@everett8610 10 месяцев назад

@@markgroves You are saying you are neutral in your comment here but you aren't neutral you are on the left. We need to be honest if we are going to be able to have a discussion.

@smalljaws100 9 месяцев назад

Everyone has a political bias. They were talking about social media and trump was and is constantly spewing hateful rhetoric. I wish she had said he checks all the ones for Malignant Narcissist! He has brought out the worst in people 🤮

@sandrainontario6710 8 месяцев назад

I'm glad so many people commented that there wasn't much in here about codependents. I think I'll save myself an hour by not watching it.

@desireeanne916 8 месяцев назад

@markgroves yeah botton line you fked up. You mislead people, luring them only to be bombarded with your political agenda. . That's right Ill report you!

@lifeafternarcissism 8 месяцев назад

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

@TanyaBrowning-xs3hv 3 месяца назад

She just makes sense and I am a fetal alcohol syndrome baby 😢

@BladeSEnd99 6 месяцев назад

What are the other 3 essential self-help books peeps?

@cathyjennings5580 3 месяца назад

Business functions 😮

@BelovedShift 3 месяца назад

maga ❤

@iamtaliba.divine.love1322 2 месяца назад

YEP…The Divine Wisdom of The Great Mother!!!💙🙏🏽🧝🏾‍♀️🧖🏽‍♀️👸🏽🥷🏽🔥💦💯

@donaldbraugh2314 9 месяцев назад

Am I alone in seeing that this mod/ interviewer is indeed a nice guy but maybe has likely a few layers of his own quiet anger? I think anger is the problem, and resentment is its cousin. I like this discussion though.

@karilebarron18 6 месяцев назад

How did THIS beautiful, beneficial, deeply enrighing forum become a political crumble? Lack of professionalism is astounding. Too bad.

@tmking7483 5 месяцев назад

The shades of grey trauma_ having sex with contempt _ loveving hateing on you kind of thing_ like eating your own shit for desert.

@melissafoster9701 2 месяца назад

I voted for Trump because I'm awake not woke

@kaylabryson1932 5 месяцев назад

The voters voted for change in policies. Don’t dumb down a country of women. And he actually delivered. Now it’s undone and we are in a horrible place.

@veronicaguppy4786 8 месяцев назад

If your getting paid money for your help it can't last long

@chilloften Год назад

I thank Trump for exposing all of the corruption & extreme hatred. 🌺🦋🌲🌸

@Mezzie1957 11 месяцев назад

Don’t bring that sick bastard into this convo. Melody is no fan of Trump 😂

@rosietrobot 9 месяцев назад

True, Trump did expose the abhorrent amount of racism and religious intolerance of other beliefs that still exists in the US. Unfortunately he’s happy to fuel it for votes… but his encouragement has certainly brought these roaches into the light.

@benjipamkaplan796 8 месяцев назад

Yes Trump certainly is a bright light if corruption and extreme hatred unfortunately daily his calls for violent actions are very trying on all of us and particularly our unhealed within our communities. Thank you for bravely pointing out his obvious corruption

@merrybradley3574 4 месяца назад

Are you kidding,Trump is the reason our county is so divided and hateful...

@user-rc2fj9nx1l 3 месяца назад

That's what you took from this? 🙄

@melissagreer1591 8 месяцев назад

I was following until the god speak started

@leahnorman9629 6 месяцев назад

Wow, really? Talking personal derogatory opinions about others... (Trump) politic Really disappointing for the "enlightened" people you believe you are.

@lhmccool67 5 месяцев назад

This was randomly presented in my feed, probably because of my interest in relationships, but the title is click bait and I feel duped. There was almost no discussion of co-dependency at all. Disappointing.

@mrstoner2udude799 3 месяца назад

Misleading title

@dudette2c Год назад

Imo the title of this and the content weren't very related. This wasn't helpful.

@TheOlgaKay 11 месяцев назад

I agree. I'm 25 minutes in waiting for useful codependency material as I'm working on my codependency, and now we are discussing Trump, which is completely irrelevant to this conversation and none of the actionable information at all.

@dudette2c 11 месяцев назад

@@TheOlgaKay So disappointing, but there's many others out there. Hope you find the one that speaks to you. I'm still finding it myself.

@TheOlgaKay 11 месяцев назад

@@dudette2c there is definitely lots of other material on RU-vid. Good luck in your search and work as well!

@TheOlgaKay 11 месяцев назад

@@dudette2c Lisa A Romano and her channel is very good for codependency.

@dudette2c 11 месяцев назад

@Olga Kay I'll take a look. Thank you! Happy healing journey to you, too, friend.

@jamescooper1558 2 месяца назад

Unless is at the end or almost,yall have talked about EVERYTHING EXCEPT SHARING THE TOOLS WE CAN USE TO HELP US OVER COME THIS TERRIBLE SPIRIT.

@DeVonnaSeabolt-rs2yr 9 месяцев назад

Why bother pretending to try to understand people who would vote for Trump only to go on to insult them. Ugh. It was an interesting video until then.

@penny35 3 месяца назад

Please don't bring politics into Codependency :(

@mythsonmyths 14 дней назад

Honey, politics shapes absolutely everything. Maybe heal the cowardice you have to face and understand what you call "politics".

@campfirewoman7567 7 месяцев назад

I lost respect for this when you started talking politics. If you can't see the turmoil the entire world is in these past 3 years then you are deceived and I can't learn anything from you

@lisapearson4989 4 месяца назад

So disappointed to hear the Trump bashing. Ironically when the armchair psychoanalysis of his personality starts his message about what it means to love our country and the great experiment of the United States of America gets lost. Trump 2024

@lisapearson4989 4 месяца назад

The Trump bashing and negative analysis of the people who support him starts at 21 minutes and goes on for about 4 minutes. Don’t tell me who I am because I support him because you don’t know.

@anthonyavitabile2814 2 месяца назад

He literally said he had to remind himself NOT to make assumptions about a person based on the single fact that they support Trump, which is good because Trump supporters were painted a certain way in the media and he was trying to NOT fall for it and treat them as people he could learn from rather than dismiss as this label or that label.

@lisapearson4989 2 месяца назад

I am more concerned about his guest. She disappointed me deeply as she was an author that came highly recommended.

@anthonyavitabile2814 2 месяца назад

@@lisapearson4989 i hear you. It was somewhat helpful but not as helpful as I thought it would be. I also thought the title was misleading. Either way you and I probably watched it for reasons not all that different so I wish you the best.

@sandrainontario6710 2 месяца назад

Thanks for your comment. Now I know I can go ahead and listen to this and just get through that part. I'm not a supporter but I don't want to listen to it. That's not what I came here for

@kaylabryson1932 5 месяцев назад

Even as corrupt and inept, incompetent…. liberals still give a pass.

@sonyab2925 7 месяцев назад

Disappointed... The title is not relatable and why would you involve politics in this subject.... I feel like I've lost one hour of my life listening to this and haven't learn much if anything ...

@user-og4km2di8b 4 месяца назад

Wow having an ad for a THC product on a podcast featuring addiction recovery is INSANE .. more of the ‘medicate away my symptoms’ addictive thinking that so prevails throughout our society …geesh. I like this particular podcast but as a therapist and person in recovery longterm I won’t be subscribing to this podcast. Ugh.

@everett8610 10 месяцев назад

Ok thats enough for me now you're dropping f bombs and children are walking around my screen. PUT A PROFANITY WARNING!! And you guys are trying to teach us about good morals and respect....