Can a ‘Sleep Divorce’ Be Healthy in a Relationship? 

Sleeping in different bedrooms had been the best thing that ever happened to my marriage. Not because we were on the brink of divorce, but because we have different preferences. I loveeeeee strong aroma therapy, my husband is very sensitive to smell, I need silence when I sleep, my husband needs a sound machine. We come together, have a good time 😏 and then fall asleep in our seperate rooms.

My uncle and aunt have been married for over 50 something years… and they still love each other’ but sometimes needing space is necessary in the home ! I don’t see separate bedrooms or beds as a mean of a divorce or loss of intimacy !

My husband and I, after 12 years of marriage, finally decided to have separate bedrooms a few months ago and I absolutely love it! I am an extremely light sleeper and he snores. It's been refreshing having my own space and being able to sleep soundly through the night. Sexy time still occurs without any issues 😜

Marriage is much more than sleep. You are not engaging while sleeping so I don't see how this can be an issue. I have been married for over 21 years and we have very different sleeping patterns. I agree with Loni! It works for my marriage! Don't nock it till you try it. 👌🏽

My husband and I have being married for 12 years. I’m 39 and he’s 49. We go to bed together but halfway in the night he switches to the sofa bed in our bedroom. I snore and twist and turn. I used to hate it but I came to accept that he is a light sleeper. No issues with intimacy btw.

I have a chronic pain condition so I barely sleep and move about in the bed constantly. I’m intimate with my partner but there are nights I need space and him or me going to the other room has been a relationship saver.

garcelle looks stunning today! actually all three ladies look so good!

It needs a less negative title compared to "sleep divorce." Or jus no title at all

My parents have done this for a few years now and I have to say, their relationship is stronger than ever! There are times when my husband has an early morning and he’ll go in the other room and I get to stay up late watching my shows. I kind of love it! Its nice to have some personal time and then still have the love time.

I love this. I hope it becomes more widely acceptable. Sleep is oh so very precious to me.

I love Garcelle…’I’d like to have a different house’…😂😂❤️❤️! Agreed!

I'm a light sleeper and I now have to sleep with ear plugs I haven't slept all night in 2 year's. My husband snores and when we have the extra bedroom we are having separate bedrooms. Also we both are hot nature and do Not like to cuddle because of this. I love this idea and don't think it at all means you are divorcing. ✌

Seems kinda weird to me but everyone is different. When I sleep in the bed with my husband we enjoy each other's company. We have been married for 22 yrs about to be 23. Been married since the age 18 myself and him 19 yrs old. It's very hard to sleep with out each other. If I fall asleep on the couch he will either wake me up or come down there with me just to be next to me. I do the same. We lay in the bed and talk at night and early morning. We follow each other around the house just wanna be in the same room as each other because we like being around each other. My husband snores I deal with it because I like to just feel him at night or sometimes just enjoy watching him sleeping because I'm so thankful for him. When we open our eyes in the morning we just smile 😊 at each other and say good morning. It's just sweet sometimes. I feel if he was in another room at night I couldn't experience that. If he wants to be on his phone at night then he puts head phones on. When I fall asleep he turns the TV down. I think it should be give and take compromising for your partner to feel comfortable in your bedroom. I also where an eye mask when he's watching TV. Lol

Oh hell no!!!! Not Adrienne saying she's sometimes too tired!! I remember she had a full on debate with Tamar and Tamara about that..she said she would never be too tired..I hope she reads this lol..I'm surprised lonie didn't notice.

Do what works for your relationship. My hubby and I are too clingy for that. We like sleeping together.

I told my last ex (who is wealthy and has a large home) if we were to ever get married I wanted my own bedroom and bathroom. He agreed and said he would be open to that as well. Sadly we never made it to that point, but I found it refreshing to be with a man that valued his independence as much as I did. That is rare.

It's not always about just being apart. Sometimes it's about the fact that the other person struggles with sleeping and needs their own bed. Some people have insomnia like my dad and his mom.

My parents got married in 1957 and slept in the same queen size bed (mattress refreshes happened every so years) for 58 years! They went to bed at different times, but every night every day 365 days a year they woke up in the same bed. To each their own.

I am just feeling Adrienne’s All Black Entire , PeriodT 😍 !

I feel Adrienne on that part! Lol…like please, I’m tired!

YAAAAASSSS Garcelle! Get him a whole other house! 👏👏 Listen, when I tell you that getting separate bedrooms during this pandemic saved my 21 year relationship, I mean it. Women have had to bare the brunt of this pandemic. Teaching the kids, working, cleaning up after everyone, cooking 15 times a day because everyone is home 24 hours a day, securing the limited food and supplies that have been available, keeping everyone in a mask, a clean mask, doing for others when they’re sick. WHEW! When I say I was exhausted at the end of every day, I mean it! I have laid next to that man and listened to him snore to his heart’s content without a care in the world for 20 years and that is enough for me. It works for MY marriage.

My parents have been married 24 years and haven’t slept in the same bed for as long as I can remember. My dad snores really bad and my mom can’t handle it. They’re still happily married

A looks gives me throw back vibes of the cheetah girls🥰

Me and my partner sleep in the same bed but we have 2 separate duvets. So we have our own duvet for sleeping in. No pulling, no hogging the covers and a really good night sleep. We creep over and into each other’s duvets pretty often though ha

Yep separate beds is important 👌

I'm with Adrienne 🎶 🎤 Ain't no way🎙 🎶 And I'm a snuggler and I ain't ashamed of it!

sleeping in separate rooms is one of best marriage decisions we've made.... it's absolutely wonderful....sometimes we have sleepovers tho.... i love a chilled room, he loves warm, he likes a night lamp, i love complete darkness and so many other differences we can't compromise on! we luv it

It started happening because of marketing. Studied this as a case study in college. Basically, mattress companies wanted to sell bigger beds so they ran ads influencing culture.

I feel like people should just get a king size bed (to share) plus have separate rooms for being in throughout the day or if they want to work in there

I think its not a bad thing. I dont like my bed to move when im sleep, when there is another person in your bed somebody going to move too much.

I do this right now and I am only 36 ..my husband like to sleep early because he wakes up early and I like to sleep late and wake up late ..but I only stay in the other room until I get sleepy then I go to bed and sleep next to him for like 4 hours before he get up at 6 or 7 .. am up at 10 or 11 ..It works out fine for use I love my space and so do he ..

I mean I can understand sleeping in separate rooms. My husband decorative style is posters with anime and I love anime but not like that. Plus he love sleeping with tv on … I like it completely dark. So I was actually thinking of having my own room. Days where I don’t want to share a room I can go to my room , but he ain’t with it 🤣🤣

Since I got my daughter she’s cries and and wake a lot at night so me and my husband decided that he will move to another bedroom and give our daughter and I the space since she only breastfeed and never took formula so it was so convenient and I was so at peace that he understood and didn’t feel no kind of way. When she sleeps I would go spend time with him and then go back to our room! It’s been almost three years lol and it’s still happening and honestly it keeps the spice up between him and I ♥️

Sleep preservation!! 6 years BP down weight down. Full night sleep during the week. 10 out of 10 recommend

I have a great aunt & uncle that still sleep in different beds now. My first time going to visit them out of state I was so confused. Their beds are in the same bedroom just separate, like a double in a hotel room

Garcelle nailed it lmfao

When I get married, this will be a must.

I’m 19 I wouldn’t mind sleeping in separate beds with my future husband. My parents have been together for 24 years and sleep in separate beds because my dad is a snorer and my mom is a light sleeper and is VERY miserable if she doesn’t get enough sleep. Sleeping in separate beds helped both of my parents stay sane🤣

You there Loni! 🤩🤩🤩

Adrienne has said when her & Israel are not traveling that they "knock it out" before bed & when they wake up so I knew what her answer would be.

My great grandparents slept in rooms across from each other . My boo has a lot of body heat so when my hair is pressed , I don’t mind sleeping alone . I can wake up pretty . We also sleep differently. He works really late and I be hanging on by a thread . Trying to stay up with him gave me insomnia.

Do what works for YOU!!!!

Why does Loni always complain about James now? Ugh so stereotypical of her to do that. She better start respecting him more because he will leave her and she’s gonna be crying over it

I agree with Garcelle. Especially when you have completely different ways of keeping house. Separate house 😭😂

I've always said I want this. And I'm in my early twenties

Amen🙌🏼 if I need my sleep, I’ll see my baby tomorrow 🤣😂

I've really made it known if our current home had space I'd absolutely have a space set up. It's known that when we expand our home or move to new space that I need to have my own room. It can even be my beautiful laundry room 🤷🏽‍♀️. It's just for the sake of being able to sleep well and get a good night's rest.

My dad always fell asleep on the couch watching TV and would go to bed at 5am just to get up an hour later. Lol My mom would go up at 11. I think it's more common than ppl think. For some it's intentional and others it's happenstance.

society should stop putting a negative label on everything 😰 😅

I hate to say this but loni haven’t been talking about James “ positively “ now days I be don’t see them being together long

Yes I love the house next door! G IS SO WISE LMBO

I’m with garcelle. I’ve been saying this for YEARS.

This actually an old school practice. Couples used to sleep in separate beds, and some in separate rooms.

I'm trying to understand Loni's relationship🤔

We do and I LOVE IT!!!!!!🥰

Anyone know when Jeannie's due back??

2:32 YUP I LIKE G's comment ALOT 😂😆

This has been done around the world for centuries lol. I know a couple who are extremely close and loving towards one another, but they both have separate bedrooms and they swear by it.

I want my midnight cuddles 🥰

I never heard of this before now. Sounds Interessting, but i can't do it.

My parents have done that they have different bed.They have been married for more than 45 years.Nothing is wrong sleep in different bed and bedroom.Just have a good time🤗 and see u in the morning 🤭

Honestly, I couldn’t imagine.

😂 yes G money. I’m with you on that.

When my partner sleeps over my apartment they actually sleep on the couch because I have a hospital bed because of a physical disability so they sleep on the couch and I sleep in my hospital bed but to me it is the most annoying thing in the world because when my partner is in the bed with me it's actually easier for me to doze off when I'm cuddling up next to them but due to extenuating circumstances we can't share the same space when we're sleeping but it is the most annoying thing in the world to me cuz I actually sleep better when we're snuggled up together in bed

*Most men snore (it’s biology 🧬 don’t come for me) loud. I understand because, it’s just 7hrs, don’t call the attorneys yet. It’s what works for you.*

Sleep. Rest. Sex....those are 3 different things. I'm all for whatever works best for folks. My Mom and her husband slept in a twin bed with a night stand in between. They shared a big bed at some point. I need my own bed to myself.

Good

My grand parents have never slept together.Atleast not in my lifetime and I’m 36.

I agree with Garcelle. Can we be neighbors? 😂😂😂

I wanna try this out when i get married one day.

I would like a different house too, I like my space!

😅😅 So Garcelle wants different Houses altogether ?? I bet with time they are like , 'And you look Familiar ?' to each other in the morning. She's damn funny.

I actually started doing this last year because of medical issues and the fact that me waking up every 20 mins my husband wasn't getting rest. I feel just because I'm suffering every night he shouldn't have to. I really miss being in the bed at night with him tho cuddling and being close😔 We have been married almost 7 years together for 16 years.

My aunt and uncle had a sleep divorce for DECADES lol. My grandparents slept in different beds. Some my Husband and I sleep in different beds. Sleep is important!! And this concept like Loni said isn’t new. And some married couples live in different houses especially celebrities. It’s your marriage set your own boundaries.

Sleep is very important. In extreme cases, a person could die from sleep deprivation.

I’m with G

I'm a big fan

My grandfather is 97 and grandmother 86.... Now that's he's old , he's beginning to give alot more trouble haha.... they've been married for over 70 years... The house has 4 bedrooms and so my granny sleeps is her own room....

A whole ass other house? I'm on board with that

My parents are in 60s one upstairs.. one downstairs been married almost 50 years. ! Umm they tax refund married 🤦🏽‍♀️

OMG...🙋‍♀️I JUST had this very same conversation with my big sister a few days ago...I'm still single but my sister is now a widow after almost 30 years married...and I was just saying the exact same thing as Garcelle...the older I get...the more I like and need having my own space. Especially when I go to sleep. Lol 🤣🤷‍♀️

I think it’s okay to have separate bedrooms, but sleep over at each others room once in a while.

I’ve slept in the bed with exactly one guy before and he snored. Or wanted to cuddle all night and it was hot, lack of air and muscles getting sore and uncomfortable lol. I slept awful every time haha. But well, it was temporary so I didn’t complain I’m someone who needs to sleep with earplugs every single night, sooo.. but I also would like to sleep in the same bed with a partner, just because I would feel more like couple

I can see this thing being a relationship savior for some couples, but it's not a thing in my marriage. I fall asleep easily, I don't snore, barely move and I sleep so deep my husband can have a party in the bedroom if he wants too.😆The only things that can awake me are the sound od someone crying and the alarm.

different bedrooms and bathrooms plz

I would love to have my own bedroom & bathroom & like Garcelle if I could afford it… my own house! normalize couples wanting their own spaces but still being together.

I love Garcelle’s idea of two separate houses lol. I’ve always said that’s what I want. 🤷🏼‍♀️❤️

Garcelle said different rooms ? Nah we need different houses 😂😂😂

...If we're doing this I want my own room.🤣🤣🤣

I want the house next door too. Ain't nothing wrong with that.

I love Garcelle. We think so much alike and tell it like it is. Yeah, I'm with her. I don't want to live with anyone. We can come and go to each other's home.

This is nothing new. again why do they continue to make dumb terms for certain things and act like it’s “new” 🤦‍♀️

I can't believe that this is the same Adrienne saying this! But yes it's real life 😂

No for me, I need to be with my spouse.

The thought of sleeping in the same bed as someone (nearly) every night is honestly not appealing to me. I would really know that I am in love if I were to reach that point.

For better or worse remember !!!!

I actually enjoy the idea of this, though I don't care too much for the terminology. "Sleep divorce" is just a turn off.

I'm still early in my marriage but I'm sure at some point it might make sense. We'll discuss.

A different house? HAHAHHAA 😂😂

To much reading may do harm to you unless it's control in substance sis's👍