At some point, many of us have felt an overwhelming attachment to someone, leading to behaviors that aren’t healthy-whether it's constantly seeking their attention or going to extremes to stay connected. This kind of obsession can take a toll on our mental health, sometimes leading to things like substance abuse or distorted thinking. We hope this video sheds light on these experiences and creates a space where we can openly share our stories, support one another, and encourage healing. If this message resonates with you, please consider sharing the video to help spread awareness. This could possibly save a life.
Thanks for posting i was curious why people are so obsessive with someone even they know the person they was obsessed is bad but still love them thanks!!
For timestamps for people who don't have time, and wanna know how to spot obsessive love: 1:12 Constant Thoughts 1:17 Needing Constant Contact 1:22 Jealousy 1:26 Controlling 1:30 Worrying about safety 1:36 Ignoring Boundaries 1:42 Sensitivity to Rejection 1:48 Difficulty with Rejection 1:54 Monitoring Behaviour 2:00 Invading Space Hope I helped!
When love becomes obsessive, you may begin to lose your sense of self. Your identity can become entirely tied to the other person, making you dependent on them for your happiness and sense of worth
You're absolutely right! When love crosses into obsession, it can really blur the lines between your identity and the other person’s, making it easy to lose sight of your own worth and happiness outside the relationship. It's such an important topic to talk about, especially when it comes to maintaining healthy boundaries in love. Would you (or anyone else) be interested in a follow-up video diving deeper into how to reclaim your sense of self when dealing with obsessive feelings? Let us know! 😊
many ppl seem to fantasize abt this like "i want an obsessive gf/bf" but the truth is, theyre immature once they realize the cons of having it, but many ppl seem to have issues of being obsessive the other way too, my personal experience
I'm not sure if it's just online, but there seems to be an alarming amount of people who just don't care anymore, and are desperate enough for someone like this. People think it would be worth it, even if the person obsessed with them would do awful, unspeakable things to them and their family, just because they now have someone who "loves" them. I pity them, and hope they do find someone who truly does care for them.
when people say they want an obsessive partner they don't LITERALLY mean they want a chick/guy who's crazy they're saying they want someone who is capable of getting physically intimate and romantic with them 💀.
I think that obsessive love should be a recognized disorder, obviously I don’t have any licenses in psychology but, it ruined my life, and still affects it now. I managed to partially get out of it but I still think about that person at least once every few days.
@Manzlaughterr I’ve been looking into this and other mental health conditions that are similiar~with that being said, do you think it was also possible that you were going thru “limerance” with that person? If you’re not familiar with the term yet-search it on here! It was mind blowing to me & discovering what it was is a game changer! Also, sorry to hear that you are still dealing with the effects of that relationship to this day…😢❤️🩹
And even if it "ends well" (I married this person) it doesn't really "end well". We've been together for 11 years and we both desperately need therapy. I think we endured this relationship for so long because we deep down know we are not ok. And it's fucking up with our own self esteem and personality.
im studying psych to be a therapist atm, and yeah i def agree. theres disorders that are kinda similar, but they tend to be a bit more specific than just a general obsessive love. but yeah i personally believe there should be a diagnosis for it, for sure. it definitely falls into the mental illness category due to how much negative impact it has on the individual's wellbeing, and the person involved. and when theres a specific label for mental struggles it makes it easier to treat
Thank you so much! 😊 We're glad you caught the Mirai Nikki reference! It's such a great fit for topics like obsessive love. We’re thrilled that you enjoyed it-and we're even more excited to share that we have some videos with Japanese dubs, perfect for anyone wanting to dive deeper into the language while learning more about mental health. We appreciate the support, and we hope you continue to enjoy the content! You rock too! 😂👍
I'm not obsessed with the girl i like, i give her space and i respect boundaries. She's my bestest friend, and sometimes i think to myself, there will never be a woman like her again in my life. She makes me happy and comfortable. She's a good friend and person. We met 9 years ago and our friendship is still strong
My bestest friend used to be an obsessive crush and now that's just went away and we are very close and the thought just seems almost alien. But now, there's someone else now recently, who I know I could be great friends with in other circumstances, but it's hard to navigate as they are dealing with their own issues, but it;'s hard to accept just being a friend and if that could change. The idea of being forever just friends seems a nice idea, but the overwhelming and rare feeling is so strong and it seems to make sense when I zoom out, just seems so difficult while I think about them so much... I haven't felt this intangible feeling in years and they seem far more compatible than anyone I've previously been infatuated with...
I used to feel like that until she left my life silently while knowing I was suffering for her, luckily she didnt let me obsess over her more so she did me a favor, she rather abandon me right there than hurt each other further but not everyone is like that I never thought she would just leave, you NEVER truly know a person or their flaws, no one is a good person, not even you or her, so don’t idealise her And if you end up alone, fight for your life and love yourself no matter how lonely or not worthy you think you are, you have no other choice
Where was this video two years ago.. I hope it helps someone to understand their feelings better, and, looking at the comments, it already did. For anyone, who is just starting to recover from obsessive love. Try picking up a new hobby, for me it was piano, gardening and photography. If you're feeling alone, reach out to friends you didn't talk to in a while. If you can't fall asleep because of constant thoughts, try turning on some vids on youtube. Go for walks, don't forget to eat and sleep properly. And remember, time really does heal.
This is one of the best Psych2Go video's ever. I have a friend who i feel an overwhelming sense of attraction to that's not reciprocated and will never due to the age gap if nothing else. The video explains why i have these feelings (childhood neglect i'd say) but i really value her as a friend and really want to just see her like that without these torturous feelings i have.
Thank you so much for your kind words about the video! It sounds like you're going through something really difficult, and it's great that you're taking the time to understand the deeper reasons behind those feelings. Recognizing that your attraction may be linked to past experiences, like childhood neglect, is an important step in processing everything. It's also clear that you truly value this friendship, which is a beautiful thing. It might help to give yourself patience and space to work through these emotions. Focusing on the qualities that make this person a good friend and setting healthy boundaries can create some emotional distance from the attraction, which over time may ease those feelings. Therapy could also be a good place to explore how past experiences shape your emotions and relationships now. You're already on the right track, and it's okay to take things one step at a time!
It's crucial to recognize when attachment crosses the line into something unhealthy. I believe having practical steps on how to detach and rebuild self-worth would add even more value. Learning to love in a healthier way is something we all can work on.
Timestamps 1). Obsessive love looks like 0:25 2). How to spot obsessive love 1:03 3). Love nd other drugs 2:04 4). It's not just about the person 2:43 5). Self-esteem plays a role 3:16 6). Attachment styles matter 3:45 7). Rejection makes the heart grow fonder 4:37 8). Healing is possible 4:58 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I think in times like these people tend to rush when it comes to relationships. In the end you have to find your own speed and a healthy way to deal with dating, first dates, sexual interactions and most important commitment as well as communication.
I’m gonna be honest, what *I* consider perfect is someone who can love me equally as I love them, it shouldn’t be imbalanced. If I’m obsessed, they’re obsessed, if I just love them normally, they love me normally. I think about it in balance, so once it goes out of balance is when it’s a problem! (Correct me if I’m wrong but do explain why :])
I felt content and secure when I began seeking relationships. After so many attempts of some relationships not working out, I found someone and quickly moved in with her, caught feelings quickly, we worked together, but simply were not “public.” She never opened up to me or reciprocated feelings, so I just started losing my self worth. I forced every ounce of myself to be worthy and seek security/validation, doing things at the cost of my financial and mental health. We had no private time away from each other, and both of us texted constantly, even telling each other when we would leave a location and arrive at another. The negativity, insecurity, and jealousy started to climb, and eventually we broke off this relationship path. I still suffer from the heartbreak, and it doesn’t help that we still live together. It’s much more painful seeing that she moved on or didn’t even react the same way I did. I still believe I can heal, but damn this shit hurts
This sounds pretty much like limerence, a concept originally coined by Dorothy Tennov (1979) I am currently working on that topic to develop an intervention for my master's degree, there is an article by Bradbury et al (2024) that might help :3 However, what I want to point out is that limerence is NOT love, it is obsession towards obtaining reciprocity and nothing else, it has mental rummination as the main characteristic and if anyone who is reading this feels identified then should work with that rummination through Acdceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Metacognitive Therapy or Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. I hope this helps ♥
I used to suffer a lot from obsessive love. In fact some symptoms are still there, but the personal growth I'm still undergoing really helps with the matter. Some of my crush's actions can still provoke anxiety. For example one day she's cheerful and smiling at me and the next day she's more cold and distant. However, considering the previous signs of interest she's shown, she might just be jealous. What doesn't help is that We're seemingly both emotionally unavailable and socially anxious, therefore both trying to play it safe. I know for a fact I suck at eye contact and smiling. But I'm tired of making presumptions about her, tired of being afraid, so I'm slowly but surely making moves towards her. What helps me a lot is switching my focus to other things. I try not to ignore my deadlines at the university, sometimes I read a book. I do still daydream about her quite often, but always interupt myself and remember that I have to keep grinding to never come back to my former life style.
I think another thing about the anxious prepccupied attachment style is that they admire an independent person for their independence. They envy that character trait because they don't have it. So, the love interest is a symbol for what they wish they had. Hence, the obsession.
I am experiencing obsessive love over a friend of mine. My life was sh*t before I met her, and ever since I've been obsessed over her, ignoring her boundaries and always being worried about her safety and general well-being. This costed me her friendship. This break-up nearly drove to end my life (I still struggle with those thoughts), but I need to learn to respect her boundaries and sense of independence. Still, it is extremely difficult.
I liked someone for several years, ever since I met them the first time I‘ve been literally obsessed with them. I knew they don‘t like me back but was always hoping that they maybe do after all. Today I finally brought up the courage to ask them out even though I already knew the answer and of course they rejected me and idk how to feel about it. I thought I‘d be completely shattered that‘s why I never asked them, and I do feel like my whole life has been torn apart. Definitely not sad or shocked or mad at them more like a feeling of emptiness, it tore a massive hole into my life but tbh I‘m glad that it‘s over, I know for sure that they don‘t like me back instead of always wondering
Yes, loving someone who barely knows you will DESTROY you. Just don't.. please. Stop it, you don't even know that they're already taken yet. I cried over this person nightly, even lost my phone due to thinking about em so much...then discovery happened
I used to be obsessed with my past crush and past partner but not anymore because I have my goals for my future. I know my worth and I'm setting my boundaries.
this video was super helpful bc i was tryna find out if my bf was rlly obsessed w me or js rlly cares.. turns out its option 1 😭 shouldve expected it tho. i know hes rly insecure abt stuff and especially abt me leaving him since weve broken up like 3 or 4 times already (the 3-4 times being his fault if ill be honest) so maybe hes js rly worried abt that? he also kinda blows up my phone if i dont answer for a little 😭 and tends to get extremely jealous of who i talk to or who talks to me or who i hang out w. this really helped and im so glad i finally know what kinda guy he is, thank you psych2go!!
Interesing thing is... I thought that I were here just to learn about how someone else behave, and I wanted to know it just in case, but... Now I just realised that i am the obsessed person, though not to absurd degree, gotta respect people's personal boundaries after all, but for the rest, it's actually me, and that creeps me out. Don't know if someone could ever relate to that, but if someone does relate - i wish you all good luck (and to everyone else too) 😅
Obsessive love can be triggered by low self-esteem, ambivalent attachment styles, and using the person as a symbol to fill a void in one’s life. Have a nice day to you
I've obsessed over someone before. But I came to realise that I need her more than she needs me. And if I truly love her, then I should do what's best for her and leave her alone. I still hope she's OK, and that whoever she's with, they both look after each other.
Ok, I’m not as bad as I thought I was. I’m at least able to control myself, it’s just the thoughts really, becuz of my ocd. Also, this reminded me of a character I just seen in “Sugar Apple Fairy Tale”, he was very creepy, couldn’t keep his hands to himself, even when she rejected him more than once.
Literally going through this RIGHT now. My friends have been awesome and real with me. Now I have a BPD diagnosis and I'm getting into therapy to work on myself for myself.
I do not need to watch this video to say, in my experience, yes it can which is why I released the person from my life. I hope they can forgive me for the foolish thing I did, but I would never want them to go through what I went through. I loved that person that much. Now, I want to be loved in new and healthier ways to my psyche in order to be able to continue being loving.
If I knew I will not be here looking this video to understand myself 😂😂😂😂😂 Just remember one thing: stay where you are praise no matter your fillings, leave place where you are not appreciate Let self love and respect mixed with humility guide you ❤❤❤❤❤❤
Being excited and being ashamed of myself are two major emotions I have been dealing with since July end of this year. The time Mamta Kafle Bhatt the Virginia nurse went missing leaving behing 11 month child. I am still having an overdose of excited and ashamed states..
The _Psi Brain_ looks funny 😅Otherwise, good video on this subject 👀 I suppose I am good here since I am enjoying the time alone just as much as with those I like when they are around. Just.. isn't having constant thoughts kinda the thing about crushing on someone? Maybe I misunderstood that part but I think if one can't stop it, it's obsessive.
I I was once in the mental hospital and this one girl was OBSESSED with me and started to draw me and send me notes. It was creepy and she was weird...
A girl I really liked blocked me after tryinbg to reconnect, we ignored each other for a year, how to forget her. That is the first girl I ever invited to a date.
Does being obsessed with someone ruin you? Short answer YES! It’s not healthy to think about someone 24/7. When you eventually get them, do they live up to expectations. The only people you should be obsessed with is YOU!
I've had many relationships disappear over the course of my school life and I kept emotionally distant from others as a result, so when I managed to stay in contact with my only friend, I became obsessed with him. And still am. I'm dependent on his attention for affection, my goals mostly relate to him in some way, I often fantasize living together or giving myself up to him as an escapism from home and college, I sometimes cry about not being with him and get scared about him leaving me. I know it's unhealthy, but I'm not comfortable asking for help from someone who knows me, especially my family. Though I'm confident I understand why I feel how I do, I'm unsure what I can do to make it healthier, like if someone else can why can't I?
This hits home a little i did get a good set in of knowledge from the girl i talk to there were no clear boundaries it wasnt exactly a rejection but it was more of why i waited so long and she did kind of drop the bomb of how bad my first impression was but chose not to cut me out i did decide we should make boundaries when we meet next time by text and i been in this pattern mutilpe times it is always about the kindness i have i also know i wasnt raised in a consistent way guess need to talk to my therapist on this as well before the friendship we have take a unhealthy turn which i already afraid of
I was heavily obsessed in love with a girl for more than 5 yrs... We both lived in diff states. We used to char sometimes... But I never gathered the courage to telll her... Finally I met her after 5 yrs... And confessed my feelings and got rejected.. Which was obviously expected... 😅😅 Now I have moved on... But it still took me almost 2 weeks of depression, stress & eating disorders... 😂😂
Isn’t obsessive love more like an obsessive infatuation? Because a lot of what the obsessive person perceives in their mind of that targeted person is skewed. Especially to think the targeted would want someone like them to be all over them in any way. And it’s a disorder, isn’t it?
Suffering from Obessive love, Rejection sensitivity, please consult Psychiatrist. maybe he will put you antipsychotics and clonazepam. And take care !!!