Celebrating the holidays when you're alone | Mel Robbins

Подписаться 2,9 млн

Просмотров 70 тыс.

50% 1

For some of us the holidays are all about celebrating time off and reflecting on the year with family. For others, it is a painful time of year.
It doesn't have to be.
I received this question in an email and I wanted to address the reality of being alone during a time that is celebratory for many of us. It doesn't have to be isolating or painful -- it CAN be a time for you to create a new tradition or rewrite a memory. In this video I explain some tools to do just that. I hope you have an incredible end to the year, and even if it isn't what the media paints to be a perfect celebration of the year, you can still make it YOURS.
---
Subscribe to the channel here: ru-vid.com?su...
---
Follow me here:
Instagram: / melrobbins
Facebook: / melrobbins
Website: melrobbins.com
Twitter: / melrobbins
TikTok: / melrobbins
---
Sign up for my newsletter written to YOU at: melrobbins.com/newsletter/
---
Looking for my books on Amazon? Here they are!
High 5 Habit: amzn.to/3fMvfPQ
The 5 Second Rule: amzn.to/3372Rl9

Опубликовано:

21 дек 2017

Ссылка:

Скачать:

Готовим ссылку...

Добавить в:

Мой плейлист

Посмотреть позже

Комментарии : 316

@CoolCraftyCreations 6 лет назад

I’ve been spending the holidays alone for years. I surround myself with lots of reading, reflecting, and enjoying my Arts and Crafting! I love it! If you continue to reflect negatively on things that don’t matter you will be depressed. Why be embarrassed, find ways to enjoy yourself.

@yolandayoung6519 6 лет назад

Cool Crafty Creations 💕💕

@ARLimitless 6 лет назад

Cool Crafty Creations that's the spirit buddy three cheers for you 🥁

@muzerhythm2242 5 лет назад

Awesome! I have VERY UNUSUAL new traditions and learning to feel ok with them. Like the not isolating...most people talk about helping the homeless. But there so many other charaties that are ignored...my heart is drawn to animals! So I volunteer with local animal shelter and even help with holiday mobile adoption events. My other things are going into nature. And like you Crafting! I look at my RU-vid playlist of crafts I'm going to work on "someday" and make the holidays time to work on them!

@spanishconyolanda3814 5 лет назад

Hi Cool Crafty Creations, Glad I'm not the only one who think this way! thank you for sharing.

@rubyrose2522 4 года назад

I cook, bake, sew, sleep, walk, avoid shopping centers like the plague, oh and stay out of debt. It's wonderful. I go church. Go drive in the country. Decorate a little bit. I just adore having no obligations. I use it as a time to hibernate like people truly were designed to do and I get close to God.

@paull.rogers4562 5 лет назад

NEver married, no kids. I got tired of being lonely one year and went out and got myself a tree, a gift, and some food for a great meal. Nowadays if I am alone on any holiday I celebrate by myself. I am rarely alone on holidays and I find it a chore to be around toxic people.

@jasenkavukelic5047 5 лет назад

Paul L. Rogers Same here! That's why I love animals!

@lots3799 2 года назад

I'm doing the same. Feels good 👍

@JohnM... 6 лет назад

I LIKE being alone. Talking to myself is usually the most intelligent and knowledgable conversation I can have.

@going-Easy 5 лет назад

this

@seven1873 2 года назад

ahahahahahaaa

@lots3799 2 года назад

With the people I know. Absolutely 💯%! There idiots!!

@HisaLight2mypath Год назад

That's lovely

@SoulMeadowOfficial 7 месяцев назад

This.

@deborah41541 6 лет назад

How comforting to know that I’m not alone FEELING alone. Strange but comforting. Thank you Mel. I needed this more than you know.

@Moonstruck292 6 лет назад

Deborah Haley me too, merry Christmas love I'm here with you 😝

@theauntofdragons 6 лет назад

I had to sit in my car last night and cry. I'm sorry, I just had to. I woke up this morning and just wanted to stay in bed all day. I'm glad I saw this video so I feel a little less "alone".

@MsBevis-ib7fe 6 лет назад

Ashley Collins ...you might like Tony Robbins, Abraham Hicks, Walu Child, and Amber Khan...all on RU-vid. When I feel a downward teary spiral creeping, or even if I feel really fine, any of these people show me how life support works 😚🙂🙃🤘🎁🎄🌣🦄🔥💓⛆🌳💙💚💙

@chadwickwhite2735 5 лет назад

Ashley you don't have to be alone. Come spend Christmas with me.

@seonf4370 2 года назад

It makes me feel better I’m not the only one who feels this way

@seonf4370 2 года назад

@@MsBevis-ib7fe *spew*

@Black.Sabbath Год назад

Did you mean: everyday

@lisafoster3494 Год назад

This year I had to cut out my family out of my life due to their toxicity.....it was a hard step to take but I knew its what I needed to do for me. So today on Thanksgiving Im feeling the void. Thank You for the reminder that I am not alone in feeling alone that helps...

@SBOK41 8 месяцев назад

Being alone is the ultimate! No narc abuse 😊 No walking on eggshells!

@logun3678 2 года назад

I’ve been spending holidays alone since I was 18, I’m 25 now and living in a small town with no family or friends at all. So during holidays everything is closed and the only thing you’ll see out is families together doing holiday activities and for me seeing that just makes it worse.

@Black.Sabbath Год назад

I thought I was the only one, estrangement seems to be the common denominator

@melodiewood1315 8 месяцев назад

Ohhh I agree !!

@flybynightgirl 8 месяцев назад

I started to tip big batistas and give to those who make my life easier during the year. I also played an instrument at church and do community activities and it helps. Then the holiday is a day of rest. Even the mailmen/women appreciate a gift.

@lynnpatenaude5548 7 месяцев назад

Me too! My kids hate me! I love them!

@Goddess_Infinity 7 месяцев назад

Same!!

@AprilM2020 6 лет назад

I have been alone at Christmas/New Year for years but I have my wonderful pets and now I'm used to it. These tips are great. 👍

@jasenkavukelic5047 5 лет назад

Kitty Martin Just the same! My pets are my friends and family!

@cjay2658 Год назад

Much appreciated. I lost my husband and child. Family lives very far. Been the loneliest times of my life. This advice reminds me I'm not alone and not to isolate myself. God Bless you 🙏 ❤️

@mailbericht5718 8 месяцев назад

I am sorry for your lost. I Wish you a lot of strength, Love and blessings!!!!❤❤❤❤

@AllisonReece 6 лет назад

You're opening line, says exactly how I feel about those "blessed" people on social media.

@bloomingorchid721 2 года назад

3 years later and I found this video , I really want to start new traditions for my and amp up the self care . If possible buying myself a car for Christmas would be epic and enough for 🌬️💜 I m actually not stuck just something within me is nudging me to not travel home and try something new for myself outside traditional family gathering's.

@1forthepeople969 6 лет назад

@Mel: Another idea for those that are feeling lonely is to volunteer. Many towns & cities do a holiday dinner for those that are alone, elderly, shut-in or less fortunate. Our area does close to 900 dinners. That's both with deliveries or eating in and they could always use volunteers. Really enjoyed your video. Myself, I am not on any social media and I'm probably in the minority but that's O.K. I also haven't any T.V. and that's O.K. because the news is too depressing and there are now 4.5 minutes of commercials every 15 minutes. I have spent many holidays 'alone' but I am not lonely. Thank you for sharing.

@mykleine 6 лет назад

1 For The People So do you know X-Mas Loneliness from First place? Cant believe that. As a lonely Person you dont have the Power to Volunteer, believe me. You are completely busy with keeping your own head above the Water.

@jamilynn322 6 лет назад

I'm sorry this is your experience, but you have no right to criticize 1 for the People in this way - their way of dealing with loneliness may be completely different than yours. Instead of playing the, "I'm more lonely and depressed than you are" game, see if you can speak to a mental health professional or religious leader about counseling. Good luck to you and I hope you feel better soon.

@storyzamtaa Год назад

My daughter and I have been celebrating the holidays alone for 7yrs because my mother was in another country. She's retired now and she even came with a plus one. She got married!!!! Hugs to all of you who feel lonely during the holidays..

@thatchertweed5594 6 лет назад

Like many others out there, I too have memories of Christmas past. This is not my first Christmas alone but at least this year, I'm not homeless as well, as I once was during this time. With that being said, too all of you that are either alone or struggling with the "Season" let me wish you a Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year 2018. Thanks Mel.

@Black.Sabbath Год назад

You never forget your first Christmas alone!

@jomearac 6 лет назад

Fight the urge to isolate....yes yes

@littlebeartarot7692 6 лет назад

First time I am alone in Taiwan after my divorce. Needed this advice. Thank you ❤️❤️

@jelineteneka9452 3 года назад

Same here

@ModernJewelryMakers 6 лет назад

thanks Mel - it is my first holiday alone post divorce - kids going to their dads on Xmas day - but I've already decided to plan a special day for myself - going to the movies & to walk through some Holiday light shows since my (adult) kids are too cool to do something like that. So there was a couple days where I was upset but then I made a plan & now I am looking forward to it! Thank you Mel for all you do! And for that 2017/2018 goal planning download - I printed off one of each of my kids too! Viki

@jamilynn322 6 лет назад

Good for you - enjoy the movies and take yourself out to a nice restaurant, too! Merry Christmas!

@dodgebullet7423 3 года назад

I’m sure your ex is better off now !

@MariMVP655 6 лет назад

omigosh SO GLAD you posted this Mel!!! My singing coach who has been an INTERNATIONALLY reknown opera singer confided in me that she spent last Christmas ALONE and sad. She is spending this year with us, spending Christmas eve night with us. I am so happy she told me so I could do something about it. If YOU are alone (not you Mel, someone listening, tell someone and yes, go do something!

@thatswhatisaidCA 5 лет назад

When this happens to me in future, I am ready with a plan: I am going to some European places with Christmas Markets. I love puttering around, even alone. Maybe pop into a pub and talk to people. Everyone is friendlier and love-y-er at Christmas time, don't be shy! Great vid, Mel!

@chee5935 6 лет назад

I was never really a christmassy person to begin with and then my dad passed away on Xmas day two years ago .He loved Xmas. The following year I could not bare the thought of Xmas day without him. So, we went on a cruise...best thing ever...no pressure..no commercialism..total stress relief. and I didn't have to hear the" awww your dad passed Xmas day, that's awful" thanks Mel

@aladdina20 6 лет назад

You are the BEST Mel, thank you!! I am not exactly alone, I will be with my immediate family. But I feel alone because I am not married and don't have kids. So thank you thank you. Social media makes me compare SO much and we all know that comparison is the thief of joy.Happy Holidays Mel!!

@jasenkavukelic5047 5 лет назад

Maria I know what you mean. I'm single and dired of questions about it. Hope things are better for you now... Best wishes!

@myplatemylife6813 6 лет назад

Thanks Mel!!!. .... Lost my mom in June, she was the backbone for holiday traditions!!!

@MentalHealthandWellness-dr6by 8 месяцев назад

So important to take care of mental health during the holidays. It can be lonely during the holidays.

@shree4641 6 лет назад

Thanks a lot 😁...This is what I was looking for...now I realize it's just normal to feel lonely and I am gonna work on it especially on the social media factor.

@vignettevlogs1571 5 лет назад

This is good advice for any time of the year.....because these feelings may be intensified at Christmas time, that doesn't mean that is the only time you feel alone or unloved. These steps will help on the normal day too and I'm going to apply them in my life. Thank you Mel

@shayasanova6272 2 года назад

This year I’ve been distancing myself from all my friends, since they’re all married and they make me feel like I’m not enough all by myself, therefore I don’t get invited to certain things, cos I don’t have anyone by my side. They make me feel like something is wrong with me for not settling … Even tho I always plan things and host but I get left out for Xmas. so next year I plan on making single friends. As Mel said, the holiday season makes you reflect and it did majorly this year. I don’t feel lonely, but it’s sucks knowing that you don’t have real friendships anymore….

@kayluideeakakay2298 6 лет назад

Mel, thank you. Oh wow! This is exactly what I needed to hear🙂. It's my first holidays alone, single and child gone for the holidays😏, this message has given me a push to enjoy my own company and keep busy😉 during the holidays 🎄. Thanks once more👌🏽.

@tel5690 6 лет назад

Dammit...Mel...Please run for President....You nailed it...love it

@ARLimitless 6 лет назад

Telly Swain not only president serves we all do 😂

@stvkkkk11 4 года назад

I personally would be cool just spending time with myself and never feel lonely but I guess it might be a different story for the coming holidays. What she said is SO TRUE & relatable & wise. Planning my own new tradition

@missh4818 5 лет назад

I love you, Mel. Thanks for uplifting people with your one and a million ways. Happy holidays!

@billielith 7 месяцев назад

To the author : I remember promising that I'd buy "all" of your books if my situation ever stabilized. Well, it's not "all" of them, but now that my situation finally started stabilizing, I went and bought one of your audiobooks today.

@odetteuys1111 6 лет назад

You're amazing Mel! Great advice. Sometimes we can feel lonely and isolated with our people around us too....

@narongroad7916 6 лет назад

This was good advice. After many many years of experience doing the holidays alone (no family in the country) I love it. People invite me to their family gatherings but I never go because I don't want to be a spare wheel. And I feel obliged to be the perfect guest which always makes it uncomfortable. What I did the past couple of years was have a week of indulging in good food in mid Dec. Than I do a water fast to detox for about a week leading up to Christmas. Than the last week of December I hit the gym and and get out to places where it is not too busy. I do New Years eve celebrations (but don't over-do it on alcohol). Than when the new year starts I feel great. Definitely don't do any social media during the holidays

@Kickingitwithkeila 6 лет назад

Great insight. I'm used to being alone for the holidays but these tips will make it a lot easier.

@Goldengoods1111 4 года назад

Same...I pray this year is better for us🎄🎅💃🎅🎄

@carolynmillsap6292 Год назад

Great advice for sure. . When my husband died I started taking trips on the holidays it was magic just such a blessing and no sadness

@PatriciaGalo 6 лет назад

This is such a big truth, thank you for the honest straight advice

@JohnOhkumaThiel 4 года назад

All this applies whenever I’m feeling down, which used to be all the time. I don’t know how I figured this out on my own, I’m just smarter than all the narcissists who were in my life think I am-and smarter than them as well, which explains their abuse-but this seemed the natural way to go once I understood I needed to get my head straight before I could make any further progress in life rather than being stuck in the mud or even backsliding. I just spent my first Thanksgiving and Christmas estrange from my birth family, and I gotta tell you, it was pretty awesome. No painful phone conversations; no ridiculous travel just so I could be tortured continuously from all sides for two or three days; no obligation, no shame. I drank beer, watched Netflix, made awesome meals for myself, went cycling, played guitar, just all around me time. I’m happy to hear this frank advice which resonates with what I discovered.

@yolandayoung6519 6 лет назад

MEL, MEL, MY BEAUTIFUL MEL, I GOT YOUR BOOK AS MY GIFT, I HAD ASKED FOR IT!!!!!! And I am beyond happy to finally read it!!!! I’ve been watched nag every single one of your videos, now I’m so excited for your book!!!!! Thank you Mel, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!💕❤️😘

@jpskfg7183 5 лет назад

Mel I love, love , LOVE this!!! I lost my parents and siblings over the last 9 years and it’s been TOUGH! Thanks for the kick in the a$$ I needed to start fresh.

@xo7454 Год назад

I booked an 18 day trip to Quebec City for Christmas and New Years!!! 😊

@bonjouralliecat 3 года назад

"get out of your house and do things." and then it's 2020. fuck.

@GUnSNRoSeSrOcKzz 3 года назад

She's right. What a great woman

@sethjamison1 6 лет назад

Excellent video. People really tend to get caught up in themselves and it brews for weeks going into the holidays. I tell people to volunteer at an animal shelter or food bank. It is amazing how giving comes back to you 10 fold

@GuyOutside 4 года назад

It’s not the first time I spend the holidays alone and probably won’t be the last but for some reason each year it seems to get worse.

@jarrett7774 6 лет назад

I can completely relate to this. I have no family or friends to spend time with, so I'm doing volunteer work on Christmas evening. Thanks for the video Mel!

@narcissraimi3245 6 лет назад

MEL you speak the truth!!! I love you, your awsome, so inspiring 💗

@ridita5221 6 лет назад

Thanks for this video. You are amazing as always!

@azzir325 4 года назад

Started life alone, and sliding into the home stretch alone again. Been "blessed" enough already.

@chevonne8492 5 лет назад

I love this! Thank you for being so damn straight foward it's really helpful and awesome advice!

@joannekeeley2851 6 лет назад

YES. Thank you for sharing this!

@raee5513 Год назад

Thanks Mel! Your advise is always helpful!

@lizdelator4939 6 лет назад

Thanks to you. .more power

@heathersmith6593 6 лет назад

You are the best Mel! Great and timely videos..THANK YOU!

@JTChi 6 лет назад

Thank you Mel. I’ll be spending holiday alone.

@Kthpnd11 6 лет назад

Janet Tan this video sure does help us!

@GusDaCosta 6 лет назад

Great video Mel!! Thanks for sharing😍👍

@beagoodlearner657 3 года назад

Very rightly said Mel

@1960genius 6 лет назад

WOW! I loved this - Thank you!!

@LadyLovesHm 6 лет назад

Mel I FREAKIN LOVE U❤️❤️❤️😘 this video was just what I needed THANKS!!!

@tracy-annmartin9875 4 года назад

LOve the straight-talking! Thanks

@lucindagaskill7137 4 года назад

Thank you Mel. This info will help me because on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, I will be alone.

@propheticintuitiondiscernm9541 Год назад

Absolutely BEAUTIFULLY SAID!🤞🙏🥰

@JohnMartelotti 6 лет назад

I love this woman! Wish I learned about her years ago.

@sabrinarojas108 6 лет назад

Omg, the best video from you!!! Love u and you are so awesome. So true on every single point 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

@christinachristina8271 6 месяцев назад

Thankyou. So refreshing

@MiKeMiDNiTe-77 2 года назад

I'm typing this 11:48 New Years Night Aloooone. I love channels like this because it reminds you that other people get lonely too

@elangok7902 6 лет назад

Thanks Mel

@ufoufo9182 6 лет назад

Awww. Thanks Mel!

@9810127948 6 лет назад

Thanks a lot Mel. Wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Love you. 💖😊🍫

@hristinavaseva2632 6 лет назад

Merry Christmas,Mel! Thanks for this video 🎄❤️🎁

@chloegadrat 6 лет назад

Thank you very much Mel 👍✨

@aprilgeigley5913 6 лет назад

I love this! At the beginning of the video I thought maybe this wouldn't apply to me because I generally don't feel lonely around the holidays BUT I do feel lonely in my business sometimes and can play the isolation game! We can apply these principles in other areas of life anytime of the year, thanks for the great tips!

@gumsguey 5 лет назад

Thanks for this, Mel. Needed to hear this before my first Xmas alone. Hugs from CA.

@ruthhowser9222 Год назад

Hello. Mel!!! Yes this is very helpful and great advice thank you for your share!!

@stefanadamek367 4 года назад

Thank you Mel. ❤️

@cherylgentillon 6 лет назад

Oh my gosh, I just Love you!

@boritami 6 лет назад

Great tips Mel! I was the one crying in the corners because I was away from my family, my friends didn't invite me to their parties, etc. This year I decided to contact a friend of mine and asked her what she was doing, and now I have plans. My thoughts were: "she is probably staying home with her husband, or she has a party with friends.." I was already creating excuses...so, I did 54321 and told her I didn't want to spend NYE alone... I believe it is a choice, which way should I go? Mel Robbins: You are a rockstart and thanks again for being you.

@Kayla-kd8ov Год назад

This is the first time spending christmas alone in another country. I never want to do this again 😅 Thank you for this video, it has helped me get through this time easier

@jacquelinelombard1475 6 лет назад

Excellent advice

@barrymcdonald4436 6 лет назад

Great advice xxx

@HolidaysCelebrations 5 лет назад

Great tips for those alone during the holidays.

@jdmannington4865 6 лет назад

Great advice thanks Mel.

@JuanAlvarez-ig5pi 4 года назад

The right video at the right time !! love it.

@teresaoneill7954 7 месяцев назад

This is all great ideas. Thank You

@Goldengoods1111 4 года назад

New Tradition for myself!!!

@peopleplacesandperspective5564 5 лет назад

Starting new tradition, and thank you for these good ideas. Yes, stay off social media. Face book, I don’t even like face book anymore. Glad I broke that bad habit.

@ccsnd77 9 месяцев назад

Very good advice! Thank you!

@s.guidry2222 8 месяцев назад

Thanks, my friend, Mel

@Scatter23 7 месяцев назад

I needed this today!! Thank you thank you!

@meganrose5069 7 месяцев назад

Same

@lindazeisky3845 7 месяцев назад

Thank you! 🙏🏻💚

@nicocervantes2156 3 года назад

Thank you for this 😌 I also feel like listening, watching, reading, and seeing romantic Christmas stuff too also is a key thing to limit myself, similar to the social media concept I hope this works during covid 🤞 Ty!

@teecee3441 5 лет назад

Haha....you're the best! I can so relate to you and your viewpoints probably because I'm a Bostonian. Happy holidays.

@user-sw4qd2up2s Год назад

Just what I needed to hear, thanks!

@cyclegrrl 2 года назад

Thank you for this!

@mariasalomao-schmidt5876 6 лет назад

Beautiful Mel, the other side of lonely is OVERWHELM when you have too much going on at the holidays. It creates a whole other level of loneliness... Loneliness within the chaos of endless expectations and obligations. Most of your rules still apply in that situation... the only addition I'd make is Don't MENTALLY Isolate. Sometimes we humans are in a crowd of people and still lonely. Find ways to connect when we are in front of people too. THANK YOU for these amazing points. I get the feeling that there will be many people who will benefit from them even though they will never leave a comment ;)

@AddieWagenknecht 5 лет назад

Yes. This is me .thank u

@jasenkavukelic5047 5 лет назад

This is interesting Point of view... Thanks!

@Misszumicat Год назад

thank you i needed to hear this now.

@RainRemnant Год назад

Tougher times during the holidays, here too, sending you hugs if needed 🤗

@andreaviola8675 6 лет назад

LMAO "I want you to get the f&ck off social media" I totally love her and I love this.

@alberttanner408 7 месяцев назад

Ben and Jerry in bed all day playing online games watching a movie or binge watch a tv show. Is far more comfortable and feel happier than family and friends that are opinionated and ask what your going to do with your life with that degree in mathematical Physics. Comfortable New Year and Christmas EVERYONE.

@Lariii_sa Год назад

Thank you thank you thank you

@ARLimitless 6 лет назад

I am subscribing to her now! It feels I should learn more everyday to serve my audience.

@moonbeam5188 4 года назад

Amp up the self care is the best antidote to self pity and loneliness and I don't mean self pity in a mean way because I'm alone myself and have to guard against feeling sorry for myself. At least I'm not in jail or in the hospital or a funeral home is what I tell myself. This too shall pass !!!

@HisaLight2mypath Год назад

Omg you're so right some people in prison But we are complaining that we are alone for 24-hours on Christmas