Childfree by Choice: The Economics of Being Childfree 

Loved this, thank you for starting the conversation!

A lot of people hate the idea of childfree people because it reminds them that it is a choice, which maybe they didn't realize it was, and just follow the path everyone walked on without evaluating the real repercussions.

You also save hella time without kids and as a business owner time is money.

Married with two kids, and some of my biggest supports are my child free by choice friends! Nothing but love to all womxm and whatever choice they make for their bodies and their lives.

I can’t imagine living off of that money for a FAMILY of three. As a SINGLE (not married, no children, don’t want to have any) female teacher in San Antonio, I am living on $70,000 and can’t imagine having to spread my income out over three people. My best girlfriend in England does-and they are truly struggling. Actually, they have two children-on the equivalent of $5000 less than my income. Hence why I go to visit her and go to Europe on vacation versus her coming home to the US. They can’t afford it. They don’t go on vacations, and rarely go out. Because of the financial stress, they sleep in separate bedrooms and have given up on marriage counseling. They speak wistfully of their time “pre kids” and say it was so much better.

Sometimes I wonder if the women have kids and say such hurtful things aren’t lashing out because it never was presented to them that not having child was an option, and they’re angry. I know too many women with children who wish they didn’t have any. Anyway, everything you said is exactly where I’m at personally, financially, and ethically and I’m super excited to be the “fun aunt” haha!

It’s my money and I want it all to myself .

I don't get it. Why are women always seen as supposed to love and want children and be around kids all the time, or we're seen as child hating monsters? I swear. 😒

I think the conversation is still uncomfortable (inter-generationally) because "choice" is not advertised to women in the same way it is to men. Hopefully we see choice entering the narrative as the generations progress forward

I think it’s naive that people say “Not having kids is selfish”. I can improve another life via volunteering. If I want to better a kid’s life, I could volunteer with foster youth or tutor kids who are poor, etc. Or like you said, help friends with THEIR kids! It’s only selfish if people are 100% about themselves and don’t care about others.

Really interesting and informative! I'm 33, married but no kids (undecided). The amount of times people have blatantly asked "when are you having kids?" is so infuriating! Plus its totally acceptable for a man to say he doesn't want kids 🙄 whatevs

So much YESSSS! I'm child free and not married and an environmentalist! I'm a devoted follower of yours now

Great video! My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for a couple of years now (mostly because it's important to HIM), and I found that most of the work of fertility also gets placed on the female even though male infertility is at least part of the problem 50% of the time. I can't even tell you (bc I don't want to know) how much I've spent on ultrasounds, injections, supplements, medications, a totally unnecessary hysteroscopy then a hysterosalpingogram, acupuncture, doctor visits, blood tests, etc. None of it is covered by insurance. I've been thinking lately I am about done with trying and I will be perfectly content without a mini me, so this video is timely for me.

I am a non-binary lesbian who stumbled into being childfree in my late 20s. I am in my 30s now still feeling the childfree vibe & life for me! 💯💜🌈 Thanks for recognizing and acknowledging queer folks :) in this! I appreciate that.

Yes x1000. Bring on the child free chats!

Who wants to get killed in childbirth too or have a murderer kid. Having kids could kill you. Nah, want my freedom to do what I want. Some childfree are aunts so they may spend money on nephews etc. I would absolutely HATE to give birth, the pain, the mess, the indignity, the vulnerability and the risk of death. No way #uk

This is a really great, really smart video. I’m a childfree man by choice at 35. My Dad always complained about having kids and now he can’t understand why I don’t want kids. Lol.

We should organize ‘celebrate childfree life’ parties. So much fun 🤩

Thank you for sharing your experience and for advocating for those who are also childfree by choice!

You are absolutely 💯% right, I'm happy to see more people coming out about child free choices, it took me a long time to admit that I never wanted to have children 😀 now I'm pretty confident about this choice... cheers

Thank you for this! I’ve heard the comments on regret, and you cannot fully plan for kid so might as well just have one and not overthink it, and from my ex’s mom… “who will take care of you when you’re old?” I wasn’t planning on my kid being my retirement plan. I’m in my late 30s now, so the comments have definitely died down in more recent years. I just keep promoting my love of travel and saving for retirement. Everyone’s wants and priorities are different. I don’t judge those who want kids and I don’t want to be judged in return.

I’m a dude and I get shamed for my choice not to have kids.

So happy to find you on this platform! WE OUT HEREEEEEEEEEEEEE! Can't wait to see this channel grow

I'm surprised people still want to have kids these days..I personally think it's selfish to bring a child into this.

Yessss welcome to RU-vid Kara!!! We are SO happy you’re here!!! Love this video, this topic and all of the sides of the discussion that you raise. 31 and child free by choice to date. Loving my choice so far!!

YAASS I have always felt the same about quite literally ALL of your points that you’ve made in this video. But, I’ve always unfortunately questioned my decision and expected regret because of how many other people have told me I should have children. So validating to hear someone feels the same way about how scary birth is. Thank you for making this video! 🌿

Omg I JUST filmed a very similar video! I completely agree that everyone needs to take into account the hidden costs for (mostly) women, something that isn't reflected in that big $200k+ number. Love that you included this intersectional, historical perspective :)

You took the words out of my mouth! Absolutely feel the same way! Thanks for this video! 🥰🥰

I chose the childfree life at 17. It's nice not being in debt and retired early. Now at 63 it is sooo worth it! A lot of people my age are financially helping their adult kids or raising grand kids.

Great video! I was like you growing up - never had any interest in kids or babies. I could never imagine 9 months of something growing inside my body - and then the whole birthing part 😱 My relatives were always like oh just wait until you are older… nope! Maybe working in tech helped because I was usually dealing with guys, there wasn’t any questioning about babies phew! I does blow my mind when I see things like women couldn’t get a credit card in their own name until 1974 - I was alive then 🤬🙄 America does seem very backwards in the whole social safety net - health care, family leave, abortion(!!!), etc.

Neither of my children have kids which is more than fine by me. But I told someone that the other day and the woman was immediately confrontational and defensive. She has several grand-children which is probably the reason she was affronted that I was perfectly fine without them.

Your reasons for not desiring kids are very valid. I concur with you. Kids are not for everyone. The pressure is real for men and even more for women. These spaces are important. Great video!

This was a great kickoff video! So informative and honest. It really lived up to your title: bravely go. Brava! subscribed

I’m happily childfree by choice. But it seems it’s hard to find decent men who don’t have or want kids. Ps: I wouldn’t wanna pay more taxes just so people can go on parental leave. It was their choice to have a kid. Deal with it. Don’t put the burden on the rest of us cuz you wanna take paid leave. Use your annual accrued leave.

You hit the nail on the head. I’m in complete agreement and will be saving this video so I can share it with friends/family in hopes that they can better understand my views and personal choices. Thank you! ❤️

People: Who don't take care of you when you get old? Me: Money😂😂😂😂

Great video! I feel that being terrified of pregnancy and childbirth is not taken by most people - women and men. Excuse me? It's met with so much effing judgment, like I'm some sort of coward or selfish person for being completely, clench-in-my-chest scared of the pain. Being terrified is valid! And also I'm worried about taking care of my parents when they get old. Even in a country with universal health care like Italy, care for the elderly is hella expensive! (I'd love a video about the economics of an ageing population!)

Good video. I am scared of childbirth too. Even if it was not painful, I still don't want kids. I am not a nurturer. I don't really like humans ie narcissistic, cruel, criminal, untrustworthy, you name it. Every single time I see a horrific crime show, I glad my lucky stars I am not a parent of a criminal or a victim. I have never been interested in kids. I enjoyed the women's history of the US. My relative was divorced around the time of the Civil War and her husband was a slave trading scumbag and she lost custody of her kids as you say, that was done at the time.

I so appreciate your honesty and totally agree with you re: why you’re childfree! Thank you for helping normalize our choice :)

Also, capitalism isn't built to raise kids. If we had other system, that could support the raise of a child in a much easier manner, maybe that would help people to decide to have kids. But again, this is a choice for each one on what they feel it is right. I am undecided about kids, and my partner wants kids. It has costed us our relationship. And, I am starting to realize that child-free is looking more into my path... and my partner well I feel like she romanticism having kids a bit too much, we ain't even stable to tackle this. I wish she was more flexible about kids

I think that the stigma of chilfree people comes from higher levels because governments of all countries depend on people making babies. They need the working/tax paying force, many countries already experiencing demographic problems some countries are on the brink of a catastrophe (especially the ones that do not benefit from immigration like USA).

Oh goodness. So many thoughts. I’m so lucky to be in a place where I’ve always wanted kids, found a partner who’s always wanted kids, and had zero problems getting pregnant or giving birth. So much privilege. I, however, will never not be furious at the lack of education there was for what it will really be like when you have kids. If you’re giving birth, your brain changes. Literally, it’s science. Also, as you talked about, there is no structural or societal support for people who give birth or who have children in other ways. I’m going on 4 years out of the workforce, and it was a choice that I made when I didn’t have to, but now that I’m ready to go back, I can see how the odds are stacked against me. Options are so limited. And yes, climate change. I’m also furious I didn’t know as much as I do now about how incredibly fucked our ability to survive on this planet is. Definitely not looking forward to the conversations I’m gonna have with my kids. But as someone who faces existential dread every day, at least I’ll be able to offer support. Thanks for talking about this. I have so many childfree-by-choice loved ones who struggle to be seen and understood. These are such ridiculously personal choices, it hurts my heart that anyone should have to explain themselves for it, but once again, your talking about it is making something visible that so many refuse to see.

Fantastic RU-vid debut! I came from your Instagram and I’m exited to see where you take this channel. Your Instagram stories always left me wanting more. Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us.

I don't know how this came across my feed, but i don't blame you one bit. I completely understand why a lot of people are choosing not to have kids. I used to be this way. I told my family that I wasn't having kids unless I got married for years while growing up and in my 20's. It's HARD enough just to take care of one self let alone another life. I'd be kidfree if I wasn't married.

Would interesting to hear of a comparison with different parts of the country and other countries altogether

Yeah Kara!!! Thanks for this video! Looking forward to more videos from you and Bravely Go 💕

There seem to be a lot of women who got suckered into having children, and who now see how hard it is on them in particular (because women do most of the work) and they get mad at childfree women for not wanting to do the same. It says nothing about me as a person, they feel slighted because of their own issues with their choice to have or want children. People who go out of their way to tell childfree women that they are selfish are so f-ing hypocritical, rude and misogynistic. First of all, having children just because you want them is inherently selfish, so they’re hypocrites. Nobody is choosing to have children for the sake of society. Second of all, they never scold childfree men like that. I used to try to be polite when explaining my stance, but you get treated like you don’t know what you’re talking about anyway (even though it’s my life and womb they’re budding into). So now, I just match their energy. There’s a clear shift in society, that started with women having less children that had now progressed to women not wanting children at all. There’s also a lot of women I see, who want or have just one child. Society doesn’t like that much either.

So happy to see your channel, looking forward to supporting your content!

I’m with you!

Hi! Thanks a lot for this video. Im from argentina, and actually I am currently going through a separation with my partner of the last ten years, because i dont want to have kids. Its very sad, but ill be totally selfish to me to have a kid with the only reason for dont break the relationship. We need much people like you saying trulie facts about be parents. In my country the society dont think deeply whats mean have a child in a unstable economy. And here "born" a lot of problems, like crimes and violency. Thanks a lot for this videos. And sorry for my english. Cheers!

Thanks for the video it's nice to hear from like minded people ☺️

Thank you for this video. Your points are extremely articulate and thoughtful. I really appreciate your attention to this topic. The thing that always gets me is the point you made that society immediately assumes women who wish to remain child-free are doing womanhood wrong or don't even know what they want or can't trust themselves to know what they want. A lot of women get this reaction when they ask for sterilization procedures or even LARC birth control methods - like the assumption is you're GOING to want to get pregnant in the next 2 years so why even bother with long-acting birth control. This just contributes to poor health outcomes. Some states still have old laws on the books requiring husbands to be advised of a woman getting her tubes tied, or even to co-sign. Getting back to your point about economics and fertility being weaponized against women. This is so rude and obscene. You're right - a mix of pity, anger and suspicion for sure. Like you said - we just kicked their puppy. This is a ridiculous reaction that doesn't help anybody in the long-term. Unfortunately, my OB-GYN sees a future where our fertility in the US actually declines (even post-Roe) as more couples see the risk of trying to have kids as just not worth it because of our high maternal mortality rate, inability to pay for kids, and lack of bodily autonomy women must endure during and after pregnancy. American society makes it quite clear that if and when a woman has kids, she's on her own and could even be criminalized for her choices about when and how to parent. Compared to our peer nations, the US is quite hostile to families and women.

You’re gorgeous! Thank you for sharing. Really enjoyed this.

Omg I love this vid!!! I can so relate child free and an environmentalist, this motivates me to never change my way of thinking 🙃 and to keep ignoring the pressure and opinions of people. 😌 thank you for this!!!. Can you do a vid on first time homebuyers and or investing on a property? 🙏

This came up in my recommended videos (I've been watching tons of CF videos lately) and I feel the same as you on a lot of your points! Thanks for the great content.

Non-binary and I don't want kids. Children are wonderful, but I don't think being a parent would be good for me.

August 1 Happy International CHILDFREE Day

People need to stop thinking a woman's job is to have kids. Religion is a big issue . Pushin creation from young age.

I LOVE this video - I don't think I've ever found someone who is on exactly the same wavelength as me. All of my reasons are the same as yours 😂

Antinatalism for the win!

Thank you from Australia.

31 year old male with high functioning autism (Asperger's Syndrome) My own father put a guilt trip on me last weekend when I told him that my stance on not wanting children hasn't changed and won't change. He then said "Son I'm disappointed in your decision that I won't get to be a grandparent!" - This came across to me like I'm obligated to owe him a child with my future girlfriend/wife :/ I'm sorry but should I be angry that he's attempting to guilt trip me into something I know I don't want.

Child free for me. Why? If the numbers don't crunch, there is no lunch

Totally agree!! Specially reason number 2. Saludos desde México.

How does 29% go to housing???? That makes no sense. I already live in a house. I didn't add another room in my house.

❤EXCELLENT COMMENTARY

Great video! Keep them coming.

Fire first RU-vid video! I feel the same. Thank you for making this video! Sending it to my child free by choice friends!

I thought these things about imposing marriage , childbearing , child raising ONLY AND ONLY LAY ON WOMEN these things happen ed only in India Surprise surprise these shit happens around the world especially in far more DEVELOPED countries tooooooo

That's why i'm walking with head held high and shoulder back. I'm a millionaire! In seriousness, It's the children that taught me: They taught me how to deal with stress at 2 AM. They taught me how budgeting for family. They taught me how to prioritize tasks and eliminate the distractions. How to conflict resolution with the unreasonable people (think 2 years old). How to make sacrifice. How to communicate with the uncommunicative. How to be leader and lead by example. No lazy chair for me, at least. How to be steward to the environment. Yes, i'm the dad who turn off all the light after leaving the room. Remind my kids to turn off faucet while brushing teeth. Only dad touch the thermostats in the house. We plant two pear tree this spring and looking forward for their fruit 4 years down the road. How to teach and care for one another. How to love and forgive because sometimes, father forgets. and last and not least How NOT to give in to easy choices. But rather take life challenges as memories. Remember the time when i had to drive to different drug stores at 1AM to find infant fever killer. I'll remember when my boys hesitated on first day of school and held on to my fingers begging me to stay. I remember when i taught them to read a whole word DOG at the age of 4. I remember when my older son tell me, he wants to be like me when grow up.... Parenthood is not for the everyone. Only those whose bold enough to walk the narrow road fill with constant challenges as they go on the journey.

New subscriber❤️

Its all peachy until you meet your partner who has two small children..

People with kids get huge tax breaks. That’s how they can afford them

I certainly understand that easier to invest in some dog or cat instead of human. Very smart calculations!

CFBC checking in

I'm totally with you on the part of climate change. I mean no parent would want to take their children to an unhealthy and chaotic place. So if I'm not ok with the way the society is, why should I bring my children? Anyway, aside that, personally, having kids isn't really my thing, except unless I'm the only fertile female on the planet that can do so. So for now, since there are many fertile female who are happy and ok to have kids, I don't see why I should go out of my way to displease myself!

Whats your opinion on Stop Having Kids vegan-childfree-antinatalist community?

Men and woman not having children is at its lowest in 30years In some states daycare more then rent

I like to have children, yet only after 35. I don't want my children to bury me early, though, so I guess you see my problem here. I've always been a late bloomer, the type who's much behind anyone in life. Yet I realized it is not a problem at all, I enjoy my youth even if I'm not super young anymore cause who cares.

I don't want to be on a planet with all the smart ppl gone.

7:58 8:00 what about the Middle East?

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Is it possible to have children OR to not have children without Virtue Signaling?

I did not agree with everything you said but you argued you're points very very well and for that I gave you a thumbs up I look forward to listening to future podcast from you

Committed relationship ...if we broke up.

Soon as you got political I decided it was time for me to end this video. Why do so many of you have to bring politics into this discussion?

"I am childfree, and i am also unmaried". You already lost me there. I am glad you chose to be childfree.

Why you need a house or too much money if you dont want kids? For buying luxury cars and purses? That is so selfish.