Cinematic Excrement: Episode 84 - Fantastic Four/Rise of the Silver Surfer 

You know what the best Fantastic 4 movie was? The Incredibles.

"It looks too real, it looks too painful. Can you be prettier when you cry? Cry pretty, Jessica. Don't do that thing with your face, just make it flat. We can just CGI the tears in" I......I don't........I can't even......Why did........What kind of....... I'm sorry, I need to lie down for a minute, that quote was too much for me to handle.

I wish Michael Chiklis could've gotten the chance to play The Thing in a good Fantastic Four movie. He deserves it.

I know that these movies are flawed, but after seeing Fant4stic, I have a new appreciation for them.

16:20 "So you regret trusting the superheroes who perform good deeds on a daily basis and are actively helping you to save the planet ... but you're willing to trust the murderous psychopath." Welcome to military intelligence.

Sue:"I still can't believe you made me do that!" Smeg: Neither can I! What was the fucking point? Fanservice, Sean. Fanservice.

at least the 2005 and 2007 sequel felt like Fantastic Four films, unlike the 2015 film which was trying to be a Scanners wannabe

The only explanation I can think of for General Dumbass is that he’s pissed at Reed for blowing him off for his wedding so he’s deliberately ignoring him out of spite

Oh, God. I do NOT wanna see how a Fantastic Four movie would turn out if directed by Raja Gosnell. **shivers**

My friend's sister was an extra in the wedding scene in Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer.

The Stan Lee cameo in Rise of the Silver Surfer has to be my favorite of his Marvel movie cameos.

I remember reading that Peyton Reed had a pitch for a Fantastic Four movie that would have been set in the 1960s and basically been a direct adaptation of the first few Fantastic Four comics. He apparently even designed a mock up poster for the movie that he included in his pitch that was just a recreation of the cover of Fantastic Four #1

Chris Evans was a horrible Human Torch. BUT HE OWNED HIS ROLE AS CAPTAIN AMERICA!!!!!

The way you described Human Torch in the first film, that kind of reminded me of Robin in "Batman & Robin."

Actually in the second movie the actor playing Doom couldn't always be there due to his shooting schedule on his tv show. When he is in shadow and masked, it is actually a standin

Great work, Sean. Your reviews are fantastic.

These movies were favorites of mine when I was younger. Nowadays they're guilty pleasures.

Note about Ioan Gruffudd: Last name is pronounced "Griffith". It's Welsh.

I actually kinda like the first movie. It's not perfect, but I felt was pretty fun for most part.

I remember te silver surfer cartoon, in that Galactus mind-wipped the surfer so that he would have no conflicts about being his herald, which would have worked as an actuall explanation for why he didn't think to betray Galactus.

17:17 = It's Captain Holt!

Hey Smeggy, I have both special editions of the Tim Story FF movies and I can confirm that the Kerry Washington/Alicia Master scenes were filmed and are in the deleted scenes features. In those scenes, Alicia showed Ben her collection of artwork and told the story of how her father taught her how to sculpt which would later go on to have a scene where Alicia more or less treats Ben's wounds and makes him feel more like a person. Not being at all funny here but it is a scene that SHOULD have been in the movie because it showed someone treating Ben like an actual person since the accident, even if she is blind. It should be noted as well that Washington's character would be brought over in animated for in the Moonscope continuation of the movie series and they would later bring back Puppet Master and they make the fact that they are related an important part in his debut episode as he asks her to join him, going so far as to try to emotionally black-mail her by reminding her that he loves her more than anything and nothing would stop that, even if they are not related by blood. 'A gigantic, galactic space anus'......so......Goat.se?

11:40 You should have said that you wanted to punch him in his perfect teeth (thumbs up if you got that reference).

I thought Chris Evans and the Thing were the best parts of these movies.

What’s kind of sad is that Ben’s fiancé actually stayed with him in the comics. Edit: it was the blind girlfriend who he was with. Never mind.

I have a good feeling in the next review, most of the video will be devoted to Fant4stic's infamous production history. Come to think of it, the production history was more fascinating than the movie itself.

I've heard they where going to play Galactus to be more accurate to the comics with James Earl Jones voicing him. But Fox figured that would be to stupid so they went with the giant space anus.

Looks like I owe Jessica Alba an apology. All these years, after seeing these movies, I thought she just couldn't act. Now I see it was the director tipping his fedora as he asked her to "cry pretty". A real director, like Stanley Kubrick, would have forced her to do the same scene 100 times until her tears were real. Sure the man was as much crazy as he was a genius but he got the shots he wanted.

Even as a 6-year-old, I thought "Yeah, Dr. Doom's story is a rehash of Norman Osborn!"

"Don't do drugs!" ... Okay, that's just sweet.

The Thing is such a good character, that they only ruined him in 1 of the 4 movies they've made.

I await the day when a Fantastic Four film actually does the Silver Surfer correctly. Or at least competently.

A simultaneous review of arguably the most "faithful" and well received Fantastic Four movies published on my birthday. FANTAST- No, NO, NO! I AM NOT doing that dumbass trope! No, but seriously, thanks for giving me something awesome to close out my 24th with. You're AWESOME, Sean.

Smeghead: (About Galactus) His 1960s design is a bit goofy by today's standard after all... Eson the Searcher: Hold my beer.

+Cinematic Excrement speaking of Rasha Gasnel and the live action Scooby-Doo movie, I definitely want to see you review that movie!! I would love to hear what you think of that movie. It was a part of my childhood and I watched it all the time, but still I want to hear what you have to say about it.

Tim Story's Fantastic Four movies obviously tried to be like San Raimi's Spider-Man films. The problem is that the Spider-Man trilogy had great stories, likeable characters and a good balance between drama and humor, something that these FF movies lack of.

Both of these films are guilty pleasures of mine. and after watching fant4stic i have an new appreciation for them. it takes me back to when superhero films like spiderman were lighthearted colorful fun as opposed to the dark depressionary films we got after the dark knight.

Compared to Fant4stic, these 2 movies might as well be Citizen Kane.

THAT NIGHT VALE REFERENCE. 👌🏻

Love your videos. Been binge watching them for days! You should have a million subs! Compared to some “popular” review channels yours is waaaay better than most

All hail the glow cloud, but seriously loved the nightvale reference 👍

Yes, next time will be Fant4stic. Fuck that movie so much....

Love your reviews, cinema smeg..

I really hope the MCU does the Fantastic 4 better justice

Oh a double hitter today! Nice work as usual Smeaghead

I still feel very bad that Horatio Hornblower - Mr. Fantastic - got dragged down into these two movies.

God I love when you make that Nightvale reference XD

Holy shit I completely forgot Kerry Washington was in this

On a silver platter.. I see what you did there..😅

2:00 Actually, according to Thomas Lennon and Ben Garant, who wrote Taxi, the movie did great in test screenings, so maybe that's why Fox was impressed. Fox actually was so confident in the film they signed Lennon and Garant to a deal for another film, which they wound up using on Night at the Museum instead.

love your channel dude

I’m glad the FF are coming back to the MCU, and I hope Michael Chiglas makes an appearance somewhere in it.

Fox *REEEEALLLY* needs to give the rights to the Fantastic Four back to Marvel Studios.

On the subject of Victor going into space with them, my guess is it's a protecting investments kind of deal. The project could have serious benefits that would make Doom so rich he could buy several countries and help his company make several scientific breakthroughs, atleast according to Reed. Naturally it's crazy expensive and Victor wants to make sure it goes as well as possible. So it makes some sense.

“Bitch, you had a choice the whole time!”🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Cool that Doug Jones has resurrection powers in another movie, "The Shape of Water." And Sean, you could be Doug's brother, dude.

For what it’s worth, I actually DO like the 2004 Fantastic four movie. Sure, it’s not Endgame ; but as its own self contained thing it’s pretty enjoyable. That being said, I’m a HUGE fan of the Cosmic Marvel stuff, and needless to say, what Silver Surfer did to Galactus does nothing short of piss me off. I will give it credit for two things: Laurence Fishbourne/Doug Jones’s performance as the titular Silver Surfer, and having the good sense to not ruin Nick Fury for the following year’s Iron Man by having an original character in the Clonel.

I never get tired of that Welcome to Night Vale reference.

Well in comics Surfer could do pretty spectacular things and he has a huge range of powers. For example he once took radiation from Bruce Banner body so he was "cured" from Hulk. So it makes sense that he was able to left Johnny without his powers but yeah, i agree that moves itself never told us this.

At least we have some comfort knowing that the MCU's Fantastic Four will be different by being a period piece, and if the live-action One Piece is any indication, the stretchy powers of Reed Richards (played by Pedro Pascal) won't look that silly (especially since it could be set in the 60's)

I need to get myself a Fantastic Invisible Torch-Thing. Do they sell them at Target?

Uh, technically it's the Power Cosmic--he can just basically do anything. Oh God, I agree with you so much, Daffy my old friend. SOOOO much.

F-YEAH! Fant4stic's next month!

Well played, Smeg .. especially the 'cant stay mad at you' set up..

The fact that we even see Galactus' silhouette in the movie and the storm cloud is what we got?

`You're voting for trump, aren't you?' OOOH! SNAP! :)

If Fox had greenlit part 3, Chris Evans most likely wouldn't have played Captain America.

Love the welcome to nightvale references peppered thru your series lol

If there are 4 reviews of Fantastic 4 movies on Cinematic Excrement that would a Fantastic 4 Reviews.

+Cinematic Excrement I am so glad you did these two movies in one review that is AWESOME!!! Will you do more reviews like this in the future??

Nice review as usual Sean. After you review Fant4stic, could you consider doing these options as well? 1. Green Lantern 2. The Golden Compass 3. Mortal Kombat: Annihilation 4. The Lone Ranger 5. Batman V Superman What do you think? Reply if you agree Sean?

I honestly really like these movies.

God help you for the next one.

4:36. When Doom says "confidential", the footage reverses for a moment. That's incredibly weird.

Chiklis probably took a cue from Ana Steele to make "crap" his catchphrase

the first one is a guilty pleasure.

I dunno, I still like the 2004 movie, though it’s also the only one of these I actually saw, so...

Best birthday present I've gotten all day!!

I think if the Fantastic Four ever goes through *_yet_* *_another_* reboot, maybe they should just do what Marvel had done with Incredible Hulk and will do again with Spider-Man: Skip the origin story, just get to the point. Show them already with their powers, and already in action as the FF.

Honestly, I think the problem with Chris Evans' portrayal of Johnny Storm/Human Torch is that he was trying far too hard to be like Johnny Storm is written in the comics, and it clashes against his natural personality. Especially when compared to his portrayal of the humble, friendly, courageous Steve Rogers/Captain America, which feels like it comes more naturally and is more comfortable to Chris Evans.

personally in my opinion i feel like they screwed up the silver surfer and the power cosmic because that's not how the silver surfers powers work

I'm just curious, have you beaten the Silver Surfer NES game? I've beaten four levels from the game without save states or codes

I new episode! I needed this today :)

oh boy fan4stic that's going to be a fun Cinematic Excrement

Some of us had to strategically move our popcorn when Chris Evans abs showed up.

Nice! I really love youre Night Vale reference

Jessica Alba is STILL smoking hot! Does this woman EVER age?! Also Maria Menounos who plays the nurse in the first movie is gorgeous!

the best part of the movie is when the thing says its cloberin time and clobered all over doom.

One reviewer, whose name I do not recall, summed up Jessica Alba as follows: "she makes bad acting look effortless. "

I saw the first movie in theaters and I remember the invisibility scene on the bridge actually having a purpose. Sue went and grabbed Ben after his fiancé rejected him. Did they cut that out for the dvd or did I just fall asleep and imagine it.

Wait a second, is that Captain Holt?

To this day, I don’t understand why neither of the big screen Doctor Dooms are ruling dictators of Latveria.

Apparently, Galactus was made a cloud by order of then Fox CEO Tom Rothman (not the first bone-headed idea he had during his tenure). In fact, some pre-production artwork had him look closer to his comic book image: i.imgur.com/Smp8yEF.jpg

I don't remember if the second movie did this, but the main thing I remember about the first one is the absolutely balls-out insane amount of product placement they crammed into it. It actually puts Michael Bay's The Island to shame, and that's goddamn saying something.

Rise of the Silver Surfer is a huge guilty pleasure for me and, truth be told, I find it a little underrated. But yes, the problems still remain and Sean pretty much nailed most of my thoughts on it. Feel free to check out my review here: letterboxd.com/dvass91/film/4-rise-of-the-silver-surfer/ The first Tim Story movie, however, is fucking garbage - it's worse than The Phantom Menace, in fact (YES, I FUCKING SAID IT, COME AT ME, BITCHES!!!) - and almost killed my love for the Fantastic Four. For 2/3 of the movie the Four sit on their asses and waste our time until the climax when they fight Doom. And that's the reason why I won't ever bother with Fant4stic - because both it and the 2005 version are essentially the same film in terms of structure. It really is sad that Rise of the Silver Surfer is the best Fantastic Four movie we've got, but I'll take what I can get.

The only thing wrong in this video is that the Fantastic Four are not and never have been 'Super Heroes' in the classic sense. They are explorers who get into trouble and use their powers to get out. That has been their thing since day one. If they happen to save the world then so be it, but it's usually because they caused whatever it is that is threatening the world, or at least discovered it.

Yay! New Video!!!!

Since Doom got his powers the say way they did, shouldn't Johnny swap powers with him the moment they started trading punches?

Raja Gosnell almost made a Fantastic Four movie? Good lord, just imagine that parallel universe.

Michael Chiklis is awesome as usual.