[To get a free worksheet (+KEY, +Script) just click here: drive.google.c... ]
A serious discussion on the subject is about to begin, when there is a question from the audience... If God does exist, why does he allow people to get hurt? More to the point, why did Rowan Atkinson nearly cut off his finger trying to feed his cat?? Simply hilarious! (Warning: The topic can prove sensitive with religious students). Level B2 -- C1 Topic: Religion
[NB: I do not own the copyright to this video clip. I have uploaded it here for educational purposes].
SCRIPT
[H: Hostess, R: The Reverend Andy Simpson, M: Member of the Audience]
H: Tonight we ask the important question: 'Does God exist?' And in particular we direct this question to our guest, the very Reverend Andy Simpson.
R: Thanks a lot, Angie. My answer, ladies and gentlemen, is going to be a predictably simple one: Of course, God exists; the proof is all around us. But I want to open that...
M: Excuse me! *
H: A question from the audience.
M: If there is a God up there controlling things, why does he allow people doing a good turn to get hurt? *
R: Ah; that old chestnut... Yeah... We're all sinful, in a way, arent' we? ..
M: ..Speak for yourself, padre! *
R: ...but we will all ultimately be rewarded in heaven. And I think...
M: ...Hang about, let's get down to cases. I got this opening a tin of cat food yesterday, ladies and gentlemen. I don't even like the bloody thing, but I opened its tin of 'Kangerchunks' (?) and nearly cut my bloody finger off. Now, why? *
R: God really can't be expected to watch over everyone who is opening a tin of cat food. I'd like to raise the level of this discussion and talk about Saint Paul who started out not...
M: ...how is it * a man can stab his wife 80 times with a meat cleaver and not even get a crease in his trousers, * while I nearly cut my bloody finger off trying to save the cat from starvation. * While there are other... other lazy.. lazy people sitting on their asses in front of the telly, watching songs of prayer * ..(?) when I..
R: ..Yes, well, God gives us a choice, doesn't he? I mean the choice to use our gifts wisely or foolishly.
M: Ah! You'll say I suppose it's my fault, is it? *
R: I'm reminded of the parable of the nine virgins. Eight of them were wise and used their tin-openers diligently, * but the ninth was a clumsy, loud-mouthed virgin who kept wittering on about...
M: Hang about! You're making that up! *
R: Look! There are 6 milling cats in this country. How many tins of 'Kangerchunks' would God have to watch over to make sure that nurks like you didn't cut their fingers?
H: I think the point here is that God can't really be expected to be in two places at once.
R: Yes, he can, he can; he's 'omnipresent' for God's sake! * Look: God loves us all!
M: ...he doesn't seem to love me very much... *
R: Well, amazingly he does! It's me who can't stand the sight of you, you...
H: ...I think we might have exhausted this line of questioning. Could we have the next question from the audience, please? It's a Mr.. yes, Mr Bentos from Cheltenham.
M: Yep, that's me! * I'd like to ask why don't they have a key, like they do on tins of corned-beef? **
7 сен 2024
