Narcissists are like chameleons and can change from one form to another. Narcissism is not static; some can be overt, covert, and malignant at various times and situations. In public, they may be covert, but at home, they can be overt and malignant to family members.
Well, for me I never knew myself very well. But having lived together with a female narc and everything around it really challenged me in every aspect of my life. I had to stood up for myself much more and stand my ground. This helped me to question myself more frequently and intensly. It forced me to work harder on myself. To individuate is a lifetime process but the narc will speed it up 10 times. Having went through the narcissistic experience changes a lot also about what other people mean to you like family, friends, professional workers and many more. And not always in a good sense.
No contact was the best thing I did for myself. Narcs are parasites. Evil to the core. They drain your soul. Took 2 years for my health to start to improve.
They are excellent actors who can play any roles at any times. I did expose him and ran as far as I could. He moved to another state.Very sneaky , liars, thieves.
I was in a narc relationship for 15 years. I only became educated about narcs 12 months after I left!!! Even when you're in the thick of it, it's difficult to know what's actually going on. That's why most people don't have a clue!! The governments should teach school students in their final year about relationships, personality disorders, codependency with as much importance (if not more importance) as maths, science and english!! This would help change the future lives of people dramatically!
So true. Try to make sense of it. Put it down to their quirks. When in fact it’s a complicated devious evil cycle based on psychological warfare with your destruction in mind.
I don't think government's around the world will provide narcissist education in schools as most of them are narcissist or psychopaths to begin with, that's a sad afair I know and a grim thing to think about but that's who I see it. That would work against them in the end so no joy there i would expect. The only way is to educate yourself and your children and your friends if they will listen to you. The good news is that this message is getting around as people are using the word narcissist more often now than ever which is good as they are becoming aware of narcissist but is bad when they accuse people that are not narcissist. I am hopeful that this will eventually benefit people with an understanding of narcissist and psychopaths too. I hate the thought of innocent people being a victim of either of the above two bad experiences.
I thought I had met my soulmate...once I had our son things started changing here & there..then eventually became crazy. I started researching the internet about what I was going through & all. I also saw the mask fall...pure evil! Covert narc!! Get away any way you can!! They do not care for you..they want to destroy you!! You Must Go Complete No Contact!!
I’m just so mad that they have no consequences. How do we stop them from hurting people in the future? Maybe not expose but this personality needs to be taught in school.
Exposed them! They need to be exposed! I did told him about himself. Causing a narc injury. Then binned him off. He still tries to hoover me back but im having nothing to do with that bullshit faker. Expose their ass to the world.
It’s not even a personality disorder. It’s a brain disorder. Their brains are wired wrong. Sigmund Fraud thought that schizophrenia was unresolved childhood trauma but we now know that it is the brain, the grey matter in a part of the brain, that is deteriorating. They see this on fMRI scans. We need better science to see it in the brain. In psychopaths, the empathy part of the brain does not light up when looking at certain photos. So the do see it, they just need to fine-tune it. We need to better it. Then we need to work on not letting them breed.
@@bonnielee316 NPD is a learned personality disorder. You develop it from severe abuse or neglect around 7-8 years old. Most people that have this PD are aware and know what they are doing. They lack empathy and don’t care who they hurt. Many times it will overlap with another Cluster B like sociopathy. Schizophrenia is a chronic brain disorder.
I so agree..this should be taught in school. They fall in the same line as paedophiles, to be wary of. They ruin families and lives. I wish we can sue for people like them
These covert spin stories, play the victim, act the do-gooder. But you personally know the truth. And slowly but surely others also see it as well. Especially when the number of their victims start to pile up. And don’t forget, Karma never loses an address.
Im glad. Karma is who im waiting for. The person im dealing with is my sons girlfriend who lives with us. She devalues me...treats me worse than I've ever been treatrd. Silent..devalue me ...i can't talk to anyone
@@jacalyntaylor6721 Stop letting her have so much power over your life!! It is your life. Expose her if you have too. I had one destroy my life! Wish I took my own advice before
@@Unlike230 my son just says its a woman thing. I cant tell him she a covert narc!!!lol. He hooked.....HOW DO I EXPOSE HER??? IM READY !!! She grabbed onto him when she was in a drug rehab...she is very pretty on the ouside...she doesn't do anything and my son caters to her every whim....very evil dark eyes....stares at me and doesn't say a word. Lol. I have just been ignoring her like she does me and im doing what has to be done in the house and working ...i did take it personal but now I just keep hoping ha ha...that my son can see her evil 😈 😢 heart and get her away from him.....my other son told him that she was evil.....he was here and left...my other son left too with his girl who said she walks around and treats her the same.....i don't get it. Lol 😆 🤣 😂 😹 😆 🤣 😂 😹 😆 🤣 😂 😹 😆 🤣
Yeah my narc almost had my soul. I didnt understand what was happening or why I was feeling like I was. I needed my mojo back. GOD snatched me from the throes of hell and said, "No not this one!"
Cathy McDonald female, The reason why people say, my narc is because back in 2018 there was hardly any information on them. RU-vid had like only a handful of youtubers that discussed this. They talked from their own experience with their narc and what their narc did. So one had a narc that showed no emotions. My covert narc sister has emotions. There was a huge debate on whether or not narcs had empathy. Finally I could see that they do have empathy for themselves and anything that was an extension of themselves, I.e. children, pets. But when it came to you, their target, empathy gets kicked down into the corner. When it comes to them wanting to be superior and you inferior and them kicking you down and keeping you down; empathy gets kicked into the corner because their illness overides it. They cannot feel sorry for the rest of mankind because mankind is looked at as objects and tools for their use. They feel self entitled to be self serving. So the problem of, the kind of narc, you were talking about had to be solved by saying, my narc. Because there were debates and one shoe didn’t fit all, that’s why. That’s why we say that; but we don’t need to say that anymore because people are getting really damn smart about them. Most of them, that we talk about here are covert narcs. A lot of us just title them narcissist/ psychopath. That’s what I do because most of them are sadistic and that’s where the psychopath comes in. It will be extremely rare to hear somebody talk about a true narcissist, what the original meaning is. The original narcissist is benign. He doesn’t destroy people. Nobody even studies that kind because they’re not a threat. And that’s it, this is too long as it is. But that’s the history on it. Just letting you know. Quite frankly, to me, this notion of, you own them, seems like something a narcissist was bothered by and started this myth to make people stop saying, my narc, because they don’t want to be owned, right? So, that’s how I see it.
They have 2 images public(caring and helpful) private abusive. They want to protect this public image at all costs. They play victim but never seen a vulnerable narc cry. They are cold and callous and vindictive,paranoid hypochondriacs. Yes some are quite sadistic and are very cruel. Then the dark triad makes it more difficult. Yes they switch from covert to overt.
100% my father. Very very devious and deceitful. Makes my skin crawl when I think about it. Hair trigger overblown temper. Prone to fits of rage. Sweet as pie if he saw someone he knew out in public but very ugly and abusive at home. Loved to play the victim but in reality he was the predator. Living hell living under the same roof as a narc and my mother being the co dependent keeping the abuse alive and going strong. Utterly toxic. So thrilled to be done with them.
Ed, you have described my Ex . He is all of the above! I broke up with him after four months of dating. He was totally insane. He could transformed himself from a little Lamb onto a devil. I am glad he is out of my life?
@@lilybellecepeda699 4 months and you left just about immediately, but others are ……decades and most never leaving; living different levels of pain for most/all their married lives…
Not only does karma never forget an address, but the covert narcissist is frequently too rooted to the spot to move out of the neighborhood, so karma will not have any trouble finding them when that fruit is ripe and ready to drop.
My mother is a covert Narc. It took me years to figure out why she was so evil and obviously why I gravitated toward people just like her. She could be nice one day and the next trying to see if she could put you in jail when she did not get her way. You almost feel sorry for them but their evil spirit won't let you. She is a classic covert Narc, gaslighting, smear campaign, jealous and envious. The world has to pay for her pain. The only way to have peace is to distance yourself as much as possible or completely cut them off.
I had to cut off completely after being abused for decades. I should have done it earlier. I did one time for 3 years. Then I gave my parents and brother another chance. I wished I never did that! Now I cut off permanently my life improved. I wished I didnt had to but they left me no other choice.
Excellent video once again.Yes,there are multiple flavours of covert narcissists and what I learned,like you mentioned,is at the first sign of gaslighting,silent treatment etc...,cutting them off of ignoring them and not giving them a chance at all.If it’s a co-worker,grey rocking them also works and while some people will find you rude,the covert narcissist will suffer from this as well because maybe some will doubt them and their reputation is the most important thing as they have no substance. I’d rather be labeled difficult than having to « play the game »with these monsters.
Walk away. No need to expose anybody, just walk away. There is enough material out here to determine if you are dealing with a covert narc. Classic signs, their actions do not match their words, texts or email. Love bombing. No empathy. Needing constant attention. If you have experienced these behaviors, walk away.
This is starting to be like a horror movie Narcissist are all dangerous very dangerous. Painful memories keeps flowing back. Especially since I still work with my Narc. After what I went through back then. I tell you she would have killed me if given the chance. Thank God for your videos. The type of person they are. They would push you off a cliff to save you and boast about how they just saved your life. 😔. I hate them
The narc of 13 years discarded me for my good friend of 20 years .shes the big ulgy bully on the block. How can you go from a beautiful sweet diamond for a ulgy big bad wolf.
The X narc was truly under cover. To everyone els they thought she was mother Teresa. But they didn’t live with her and have to put up with her mind games , lying etc. I’m shure she always told people her side of the story and I was the problem. Deflection was one of her traites and she was good at it. I discarded her causing a narc injury. It’s been 6 months and no word of her since. Not to say she hasn’t been hoovering around without my knowledge. She has or had a good job making about 58k a year. Last week I got 3 calls from the Court and Collectors looking to serve her. Looks like Karma is starting to work on her. When I found this out I actually felt sorry for her. I didn’t want to take joy in another persons tradgedy. But then I remembered how she lied and misled me for the whole time we were together . 12 yrs. So then I thought she is starting to reap what she has sown. And who knows what els Karma has planned for her. I can only pray for her. GOD says Pray for your friends And enemies. I can just wish her well and keep moving forward with the Plans GOD has for me and Not look back.
Turo Raego Yes, keep moving forward. Live your life! Through all that you’ve been through the one big lesson is to Love yourself. Love yourself enough to not get guilted, manipulated back into these types of relationships again..☮️💕
I hope my ex narc is getting his karma soon and my evil parents that almost killed all four of their kids with their evil covert bullcrap. My mom wanted all of us dead. She needs to be off of thus earth already but the strong evil in her keeps her alive.
After you have come out of the other side of a relationship with a covert narcissist & done your research you will spot coverts far easier. They will not add up under scrutiny & their language is fairly cryptic. They are quick to move on opportunity & quick to befriend those that will help them improve their position. I was with a malignant covert for 9yrs & married nearly 7 of those. The marriage proposal was hers & came within 3 months of our relationship. My ex wife also works for the police so they form part of her support network. I sent evidence to them & they ignored it. They are an absolute nightmare.
@@wendycook2524 Nah I'm fine Wendy. Once you figure out their traits & how they use your emotions against you it's a different ball game. Gotta lose your controls. Put your hands up & be honest & open. Anything that's embarrassing or your ashamed of lose that as they use it against you. Any love you had for them lose it & deal with them as if they mean nothing. Any fear then you face it & don't back down. Basically love, guilt, shame & fear will control you. You have to break their controls over these emotions of yours. Your are in control of you & you must act as such. They will play games with your perceptions & use their flying monkey's to validate their position. If you believe them or their monkey's you will never be free. If you sit back & weigh up what their trying to do your half way there. They will push & pull on your own emotions & they will make suggestions that your supposed to follow in order to deliver for them. Sit back & check all of your facts. Check your emotions & calm yourself & play out their scenarios in your head to see what their after. Use science, facts, evidence & truth from trusted sources & always ask your own conscience if it sounds right. Never feel guilty about saying no. Never be this good person they rely on you being. Don't be afraid to piss um off & never feel ashamed of anything you've done. Own up, put your hands in the air & admit to mistakes. Don't behave like that naughty child you remember being & feeling like your being judged or told off. They will try & make you feel like your that naughty child. Decencortise, stand up & put your middle fingers up & say fuck you & be proud. They ain't worth stressing over at the end of the day. It's you they put on to deliver what they can't. It's you they want to deliver as being the nice person you will feel guilty & do it. You'll keep your mouth shut & not want to rock the boat & they will continue to put on you even when your exhausted. When you blow they will put the guilt trip on you so you get back to trying harder until the next time where they have to shame you with other friends within their group that make out they do this, that & the other. When they fail with all these things then they'll threaten to leave or end the relationship playing on your fear. Finally when your that low they may discard you without reason so your left in an emotional no man's land. They will never give you answers as they they don't want to fix you. They like you broken for future purposes or for bragging rights within their tribe. Thing is you don't need their answers as they will be lies anyhow. Thing is if your honest with yourself you were probably fed up to the back teeth with them anyhow constantly putting on you & if your really honest when all calms down its way more peaceful without them. You probably felt like murdering them with some of the shit they were coming out with anyway. I know I felt like that. The daft bint was clueless & every idea shed come up with was all to cock & never made sense. You feel like your going insane but it's not you it's them that don't make sense & you can't dent through their outer shell which just winds you right up. Better off without them but make sure you break those perceptions. Not all is what it seems & alot of it is image.
Do you also agree that many Western women have narcissistic traits nowadays? Because after my narc experience I also have my antenna’s working and it saves me a lot of future problems.
I never knew what a Narcissist until I had to run for my Life July 5, 2017, Nice to me In front of neighbors but behind closed doors he's a Monster! I was with that Monster for 2 yrs he tried to drive me insane with gaslighting and manipulation tactics, in the end he tried to triangulate and Hoover me back into that Dark Cloud of his but I ignored any of his attempts, if anyone is with a Monster RUN forreal!
Not to mention.. their flying monkeys (mother and brother in my case) knows that he is a complete lier and abuser but will say nothing except for help the narc smear your name.....
The Narc in my life is constantly disrespecting me, he seeks power over me, he refuses to leave me alone but it cannot be proved because he is very very covert. He even has the police on his side. He will not stop persecuting me bacause he has powerful supply from my home. He just wants to live on easy street at my home. He does not discard me because he has abundant supply in my home.
Very accurate and informative video ! My Ex husband is the "Poster Child" for covert Narcissism , yet I truly believe that he is a "Malignant Narcissist"! Like you mentioned in one of your videos he is now calling me a Narcissist ! ( I am positive ) that he knows that I am not but, narcissists " Get Off" on us trying to convince them otherwise, when we try, try, try to explain that they are wrong about us , they feel Important ! Narcissists Are Fools ! Proverbs in the Bible speaks clearly about Fools ! The similarities are Eye Opening. Please , Do more specific videos about them , may i suggest The so called Spiritual Narcissist .
I have done one called 'Church are Hot Spots for Covert Narcissist' but yes I am hoping to expound more on the spiritual/religious narcissist. Peace and blessings💞
The Bible exposes the narcissists as "the wicked and the fool"...even down to their characteristics. Why do Pastor's not teach their congregations this? Could be because narcs love praise and places of honor....and many pastor's fit the bill.
I have a cousin who's therapist asked her to bring her mother in for a session. The therapist asked her mother why did she leave her daughter in Africa at the age of five and only brought her son's to America, and never came back to get her? She answered that my cousin was the strong one. The therapist said how strong did you think a five year old little girl was. The therapist wanted to understand the reason for my cousin's parents actions, and why they didn't even check on her? The mother started crying, and my cousin ask the therapist to stop. Then the therapist asked my cousin why is she protecting her mother? The therapist knew the mother was using crocodile tears to get a sympathy pass, she saw right threw her.
This is spot on! It is so frustrating that other people around them are so snookered by their smooth tactics and ability to put on such an acceptable façade that even if you were to reveal the truth about these horrible narcs, you would not be believed. If they are destroying themselves from within, why does it seem to take so long to take effect and they do so much harm to others in the meantime????
Whomever they work for will eventually see the mailipulation even though they are thrill of what it can accomplish for them they too will see the devil that lurk within. It bother me how other people fall for their victim bullcrap without really knowing the truth . Oh well I had to live it and it wasn't nothing but pure HELL.
I was married for 9 years to a covert narcissist. She at times could be an over narcissist, as well. She always played the victim card to get away with everything
My exwife covert 11 yrs married , when masked slipped it was just plain strange , I dated had a few longterm relationships never has a woman switched like my ex wife, I told people that it's like she looks the same but different brain , person I dont know who this person I was with for over 12 years she is gone when in reality she was never there to begin with , it really creeps me out how vicious and evil she is ! I have a 14 yr old son who has been terribly brainwashed but little by little as he gets older hes seeing what a rotten bitch she is ! But hes kinda stuck he cant run away and come w me because that's his house his town , friends everything plus he doesn't 100 percent believe his mother could be so nasty and lie it's very difficult situation, I do not talk bad about her too him it just puts added pressure on him , so I throw subtle hints to him so he can take his time and put the puzzle together! She will regret it when hes an adult no doubt about it!
Yes, they switch sometimes. Sometimes they can also become borderline. According to some professors in psychology cluster B personality disorders are one and the same disorder. Sam Vaknin also has this opinion and he can explain it very well which I can’t.
Hi, I'm new to your channel but not to narcissism, it has been quite a learning experience for me over the last 6 years of learning and experiencing it. My grandmother is a covert narcissist, she is very pleasant and polite with strangers, gives away a lot of gifts of things that she makes, but during the pandemic with us here at home she hoarded food and refused to share, gave us the silent treatment and called people and discussed all the lovely food she was eating while myself and others were starving. Eventually another family member brought us some food and she picked a fight with that family member. We can't say anything to her in an argument we have to let her argue by herself, anything we say is used against us later when she calls her circle of friends on the phone and repeats anything we say out of frustration with her to malign us, she never shares what she says or does to provoke us. You sound as though you are of Caribbean heritage, so am I. I look forward to keeping up with your channel daily, thank you for all the hard work and time you've put into sharing this information.
Hi Ardent. I am indeed of Caribbean Heritage. Many people have tried to guess my accent but you are spot on. You should check out my video the ageing female narcissist, your grandmother fits it. I´m sorry about your situation I hope your situation improves soon.
God allowed me to stumble onto a channel with this I ended up having to climb out of a bedroom window and hopping on a Greyhound bus to get away from his moods he was a Doctor Jekyll and mr. Hyde 🧐it's been 5 months no contact and I'm still hurting but I'm grateful I'm gone
(Jeremiah 17: 9-10) The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? “I the Lord search the heart and examine the mind, to reward each person according to their conduct, according to what their deeds deserve.”
Clarice, you are giving the narc too much credit. I noticed something not adding up while I visited with him for the first time. Way off the wall. He asked me if I would go on a road trip with him, that he would rent a car. He then asked if I was afraid he would kill me. He asked me several times to go on a road trip with him. I told that is something I would not ever consider doing! Damn Sick.
Living with one now and trust me they are expert actors. 73 years old, very deadly. Told me when confronted, I am pretty sure I was speaking with the spirit controlling her. It told me with a smerk and boast that I am the only one who see who she really is and no one would believe me. It said to me that I am the only one who sees her this way. She knows she is putting on a great act that is fooling many. She pretend to care about animals, yet she wants none, and she pretends to care about children. She positions her self expertly. If you know what to look for the will reveal their true nature. Also once they are triggered.
Thank you. Your video is absolutely right. I have experienced the same from this covert narc who is overt sometimes to very dangerous extent. But he went separate after he realised that I became too strong for him to destroy me with his evilmindedness! I'm blessed in abundance by my savior Lord Jesus Christ to get rid of that demon, my living itself it's a miracle as he was too dangerous for my survival!
I agree on that. No two people can be exactly alike as if they came from a cookie cutter. They can be born in the same family with the same parents and a similar background, but they'll approach the world very differently. It's a scientific fact that every baby born already has his/her own temperament. In my opinion, babies may lack experience, but they are not a completely blank page- they have a soul in there. If a child is raised by narcs, there will be great differences because of the inconsistency of the narc parents and the blatant favoritism, scapegoating or any other evils they have to live with. Some will buy into the narcissistic package, as I call it- others will shun it and won't be forced into an assigned role no matter how narc parents may punish them. It stands to reason that covert narcs will have different approaches. They learn from narc parents and they learn what works with their parents- they take all that with them. I had a conversation with a very well educated woman who surprised me with an almost primitive fatalism. I was telling her about an obnoxious narcopath I wished I didn't know and how I had no compunctions about showing him up for the jackass he was. It was easy because this man was blindly arrogant. I couldn't tolerate him and his penchant to humiliate people. A lot of people accepted his line of bullshit about his fake image too. Sometimes I wonder if certain people are zombies. Her response was he was raised to be that way, and so, it should be accepted to a certain extent. My question to her was that if she'd been raised to be a buffoon, should she have accepted that? She told me that I'd given her food for thought. I should hope so. As you said, the more the narc behavior is accepted, the more they are emboldened, overt or covert. I can't understand why so many people are resistant to doing their own thinking as if it will hurt them. There's no doubt in my mind that anyone who lets a narc do their thinking for them is going to experience some serious pain. It's highly dangerous. I expect it must have angered you a great deal to see your father mistreat your mother that way, Clarice.
My sister is a covert narcissist. She stirs up abusive trouble; then distances herself from it, innocently & sweetly claiming, “I’m not in it; I don’t do negative.” For years she’s led everyone to believe & respect her for being an “occupational therapist” when in fact, she has not earned the educational credentials to be an OT. Hence she is only an assistant, which is honorable enough. But often complains that she is not appreciated by her co-workers, although she purports to know more about the job than them. Recently, she “took time off” from her career, then later could not get s job in her field. Personally, I think she was fired for insubordination. But, she would never admit it. She’s too busy snubbing her nose at those who are “clearly less worthy than she!”
No longer will I be in a situation with someone who only has excuses, lies, put-downs, and fake charm come out of their mouth. Man, these covert narcissists, know just how to avoid accountability and talk you out of everything by pretending to be your friend. The abuse comes in the form of getting you to doubt yourself for standing up to them. You can't trust them, cause sooner or later, you could "forgiving and forgetting" your way through a 40 year marriage with one.
It took me 41 years to find out that my daughter is a world class narcissist. Prolific liar, raging lunatic, and completely devoid of anything that remotely resembles compassion. It only took her 5 minutes of raging to destroy our little family, and she did it with glee. But I have video evidence that she doesn't know about, and I'm preparing to sue her. Does that make me a narcissist? You be the judge, but let me posit this: she came very close to placing my wife in a guardianship nightmare. I didn't see or talk to my wife for nearly 3 months. I hired a lawyer and in October of 22, I won a hearing that brought her home. My daughter was furious, and I LOVED IT! It cost me 9 thousand dollars in legal fees, and she continues to harass me. I feel that suing her is the right thing to do.
The covert narcissist is very fearful; if you are confident in who you are, you may want to comfort them to share with them the way of love. But consider that a feral cat is also fearful and in need of love and often beautiful but if you get too close to them 🤕
Losing one’s identity-I attest. Yes this happened to me. I went to help my mother while my father was at his end of life. Keep in mind I was low contact for 10 years leading up to this point. I was completely strong in who I was before I decided to ‘help her see through’ another phase of her life. It only took 3 months being around this woman to have me return home feeling like a disheveled 14 yr old despite being in my 40’s with a high positioned job and many direct reports. I have had to cut her and the rest of the family off because their masks fell off (since they saw this as an opportunity to ‘bring me back to some role in the toxic family unit’). She underestimated me and thought she got me back under her thumb. I exposed her and her side of the family following the discovery, with evidence, her own admission, and witnesses of the illegal disinheritance of my father’s children, even her own. She thought she could bribe me and keep me quiet for getting me first class tickets to an extended family party in LA (only 3 months after my father’s death), to which I said no. What is so sad is that my mother has no idea who I am or what I have accomplished. I have flown first class and business class more than once in my life and besides my moral compass isn’t cheap, not even for the share I would have gotten if I was not disinherited, which my career affords me in a year. She does clearly believe I’m still the 14 yr old trying to figure out who I am in the world, believing that some seats on a plane will get me to be an accessory to her illicit activities. This woman must be so delusional to believe people can be bought this way…and if so perhaps it has worked for her in the past, to which I attribute to the idea that those people are not as accomplished, worldly, nor empathetic to oneself and others i.e. users, other narcs, and great pretenders. No wonder she took my 60 yr old NPD half-brother (her step son, one of the siblings who threatened to beat my face and other insidious verbal abuse inflicted on me and to this day calls it an innocent joke and abused me and has held me back from opportunities all my life growing up). My mother knows he is one of my abusers and so together they took pics as if they’re having fun when I reality they are just playing a game with each other: my mom pretending to care (because of said disinheritance) and my half-brother pretending to be loyal (in hopes that he gets money from her). Jokes on them, my IQ is above average and their tactics only work on children and people with no minds of their own. They are sad people. Ma will have millions in her bank account but there is no one left in the world who truly loves her who wants to be at her bedside before her boyfriend Lucifer comes to pick her up. And my brother who pretends to be a millionaire yet has debts up to his neck, has little to no savings, and works two lowly part-time jobs to fill his never-ending hoarding hobby. They hate me for knowing who they are behind their mask. I know everyone now behind their mask. Ex-‘friends’ too. Jokes on all of them. What absolute losers and space wasters on this planet.
Thank you for your share. Sorry for your experiencs with narcissistic people but very grateful for your perspective on this disturbing disorder. 22 years in and I feel the only way out is when God opens his door . For now I can only protect myself by continuing to educated myself.
Most narcissists live a double life. The three things that they care about Most is their image, narcissistic supply and money + power. Their public image is impeccable. They seduce you with their fake charm and friendliness but behind closed doors they are snake nasty and devious. They are master manipulators who have the evil capacity to destroy lives. Sometimes you have to stop seeing the good in people and start seeing what they show you. No one sees the abuse except the victims. Lives ruined and families destroyed and the victim is shamed and blamed for everything. My mum has NPD and doesn't know what love is and has never apologised for anything.. she never takes the blame for anything and doesn't even feel remorse when she hurts anybody. She hasn't got any insights into what is acceptable behaviour and what isn't. She has not developed or matured past childhood but she can get by in life without any help and won't accept that there is anything wrong with her. I've been no contact for 13 months and I feel like a weight has been taken from my shoulders and for the the first time in my life I feel a sense of freedom and I am actually beginning to feel happy for the first time in 35 years and yes I'm being very honest. I will remain no contact till she dies and I don't mean to be cruel but she's made my life a living nightmare. .x
This male was.... He was so sweet to people on the outside even when I tried telling people who he was and the abuse they didn't believe me. I remember 1 of my friend telling me that I have to change and smile more often because the narassist love jolly people but she wasn't seeing the abuse.
All of them show it and MANY others see it, its just that some call them out and expose them. While others just ignore it (Flying Monkeys) but all in all it's all a Very dangerous show for the Narcissist and their victims!!!!! I was a Witness... (KEY WORD) WAS!!!!!!!!! People use the word "Disgard" but all should know that it doesn't just happen when they get bored with you, it was SCHEDULED when they meet you! You just didn't get the memo of a date and time. But if you were discarded don't be offended or upset, fall to your knees and THANK GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In the working environment it is easier to spot the covert narcissist when an overt narcissist is in close proximity. The overt enhances the covert’s characteristics
@Desiigner they hang in packs, they have know true friends! They only hang around low hanging fruit, that's why the covert need supply from their victim's, they trick us because if the true self would approach a normal person we wouldn't be bother!
I am married to one I had no idea I always made excuses for him for his behavior. The day I told him he wasn't bringing drugs to my house anymore. The more I would let him know he had to stop the more he would get it at the end of the relationship. So The day I said no he made my life a living hell. The last month I noticed to much that I had to be behind him which I did not trust him not even with the kids. So I'm the morning he still kept up that I finally blew up and screamed that he need d to get out of my house. As u finally broke down crying and screaming I saw him smiling and noding his head as I looked at his eyes they were black I saw this never ending tunnel no soul. I don't know if he knows I saw this please advise. No one understands me. He then sat down and laughed and asked me if I was ok.. shit of course not .I got my kids n left.bwhen I got home he was gone took everything.. I filed for divorce and he keeps telling me his taking my son away. I don't trust him now I know he had something to do with my 4 month baby death 10 years ago. After that I busted him having a over 2 year affair that's when all the abuse got worse. But it's over now I got my mental strength. And stood up to him I have always been strong don't know what happened. Please let me know my email is nmontoya72@yahoo.com.
Please check out this video. ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-FWoKFcFei8k.html What you witnessed with his eyes turning black is very common. Please read the comments as well. I will message you as soon as I can💞
My ex are a covert narc...but have some overt behaviours. She would try to hide/go silent with manipulation/gaslighting...but open about her control. She was overt with her over-spending and drinking...but tried to hide her sex-control...not very well as I was able to deny her sex for months...which only caused her to cheat several times. So she was mild with some things...but very sneaky with others. Her brother are also a narcissist with a heavy alcohol addiction as her farther whom also have issues controlling his addiction. Her behaviour of blaming others are very open...for instance revenge about money from her ex-husband. She would go to great length to make him pay only a small amount...and he hates her openly. His eyes are glowing from pure hate when he see her....and on the other hand he has some wink of brokeness in his eyes. I think he still loves her...poor soul.
Thanks for the video my dad was a grandiose overt narc so he was very overt in his abuse and stuff like that. I can now after 3 years of healing recognize almost all narc people really quick. Its in their draining energy and how they can't be reciprocal. After having my own good boundaries in place and connecting from my inner child with others i see how there are people that just need admiration and to dominate, and have a draining energy, I can also match that with their actions. That being said, i agree with you there are some coverts who are almost on the malignant side. Specially covert women, can be phoney in a way , that other women whom are codependent will naturally have difficulty noticing how much of a covert narc they are. When we see the covert narc for who they are, and start calling out there behaviours, yes they can cry crocodile tears etc, they will also as you mentioned try to act like its a one off thing even if there where 5 -6 things in a row you could mention, and once there mask falls off anyway you see who they are. Its like , manipulative and malignant. It sux that I have 3 almost years in healing, 1 year understanding more narc abuse, but some people fully drink the kool-aid for narc people still. So gotta keep my boundaries, and self-respect and healing, choose my social circle where there aren't any narcs, or enablers pretty much! Even if there are narcs virtually in every circle even support groups, atleast my personal support system I can make sure i connect with empathic people!
Coverts will steal all your friends by acting like victim of a crime , even when you tell them to stay away from your friends they believe everything you have belongs to them . You have to give then your bad friends if you want revenge lol..
From what I have been able to gather so far my son is a Narcissist, I think he would more fit the covert type but he does occassionally enter into the overt territory. He is very jealous of me, an example; My two daughters could be having marital issues or problems with their children. They do not go to him for advice and that really pisses him off! Even though they have both been married longer and their kids are older, he still thinks that he can offer just as good if not better words of advice than I can and so their not goingto him really has angered him in the past. I recently found out from my grand daughter, my son's daughter, that whenever she talks with me my son wants to know what we discussed and if she asked my advice on anything he always will tell her the opposite to what I told her, rarely will he agree with my words of advice. She also told me that he has told her to not listen to me and to only follow his advice. My son seems to enjoy making me look bad or making me look wrong about just about everything, it's as if he gets off on it. If he buys me a gift he wants me to sing praises about it, but if I get him something, it's not that bog of a deal.
I am still trying to put into perspective and make sense of 4 years of my life spent with a Covert Narc who hid himself behind a self Diagnosis of Aspergers.. Well played I was, continually forgiving and trying to understand an Aspergers affliction when infact, he was an emotionally detached Vunerable Narcissist.. Oh the lies, Manipulations, lack of accountabilities, omissions, confusion placed under the guise of Aspergers. SHAME !
I look at the Narcissist and Wonder how he can change like a chameleon He pretends to be good after a day when he has realised that I am not going to tolerate him and I have decided to leave.. So pathetic really for these people..🌹 Thank You 🙏🙏🙏💕💕💕
I know there is a familiar dynamic. His family played games with me until I shut them out. When we met I was threatened and told, "you better not make him choose between us and you because he will always choose us". That comment was very random so it caught me off guard and hurt me. 25 years later, I realize I was used as a part of their game. I'm close with my family and would never have separated him from his, but they constantly interfered. His nick name is "bubba", that explains more than I can! What I did realize, they tell you everything you need to know before you marry, you just don't "hear" it until your buried in it.
Thanks for your teachings my ex africain husband is a hidden narcissistic I am stil not free after 7 years that he has abandoned me he had married for having a permit to work here in Switzerland
I don’t play - I call it out immediately & this will ither make them stop playing or move on to others where they can start their lies all over again. Most move on
Good morning ms clarice. Could you please do a video on WHEN YOU Stay Up ALL NIGHT LOOKING OUT ThE WINDOW WAITInG FOR THE NARC TO CoMe HOME AND He OR SHE DOESN'T. My body is tired and exhausted.
You need to get your rest...this is part of breaking you down. Don't allow them to do this to you. It's all about pushing your boundaries. Please see this vid ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-kGuHY14JRbE.html
6and half years with my ex covert narc girlfriend 7months out left the same time has she disquarded me didn’t no about narsissim until I left they are excellent at what they do my nails c love or drinking but with a hat she loved to gaslight I would ask her to stop winding me up but she would keep going. my mother had a stroke 5 and half yes s ago my narc gave the impression she was saint. I thought to push my mum round like that in a wheelchair she loved me .?i thought she brilliant but she done very t to make her self look like a saint and boy everyone said what an angel . for me to go round saying she was a narc wouldn’t help . I tell people she went off with new fella which shocks people covert narc can are evil I would never have believed it unless the lord showed me a number of things first on partingbwe met for coffee over the table I saw a mask fall I saw her face contourt and written over head was the word harlot and there was the spirit of jezabel the evil hate it had for me .secondley she text me 2weeks atfter parting the word salad these texts were coming from a walking demonic meat suite .she text saying I would have looked after you . You abused me I text back. She replied there’s many forms of abuse.i texted back and said you were sleeping with other men. She replied there’s no one inside me at present. That was a spirit of mockery. She then replied and said she was special I replied ok jezabel .the conversation ended godbless you Clarissa for your great video mick
Simple yet up to the point . I had a relationship with one of them. I know about a typical narssist please contact me I will give you a lot of information and details which you can use it for greater good
Yes I live w/an dark_triad covert/overt.. female age 68. I self quaintined myself to avoid the situations as much as possible. But she sits outside my door, really creepy. Bangs on my door every 2-4 minutes, as I egnore, she pitches temportantrumes, calling people telling them I won't leave her alone. Crying Help ! Me! For Hours. (oh my Bob!). I turn up the volume. This insidious has a fatality all the time, one emergency after another. Amazing the energy that they spend being Mean&Stupid. Discusting
Oh my do they LIE LIE LIE.... hypocritical! Always making you think you are delusional when you speak on their repeated actions. Also my ex always ruins special occasions. I was doubting myself. So I finally started recording our conversations. When he snapped figured out I saw him for who he TRULY is ..HE LOOKED SO DIFFERENT AND ANGRY. He fulleg me ...I honestly believed he was a good guy ..5 years later I'm glad I'm no longer involved with him. I was mentally and physically drained.
There is a saying you are either part of the problem or part of the solution. I don't believe sticking our heads in the sand because we are scared of a narc and what they will do is a solution, If we know about how damaging these people are but are only concerned about ourselves then we are as bad as they are by not telling others. People aren't stupid they know these people are toxic it's obvious, so they won't confront them. What they will be armed with is the knowledge of how they think and operate and to realise spending as little time around these people will be far better for their mental health.
I don't think they are hard to spot. If. They provide you with irrefutable evidence. And you listen very carefully to the words they use and how these words are used plus the tone they are expressed in.
You know it's funny. I went round and around trying to figure out if my ex was a narcissist and it blows my mind there was so much crap everyday of toxicity. It's been 2 years since and i still feel like i am a recovering World War II veteran with PTSD. I didn't know humans could abuse so deeply. But whatever i may think inside, the fact is is that people can be downright ugly and brutal. You have to protect yourself. And call it out when you see it. I'll tell anybody now to back off or f*ck off in a heartbeat. I don't care nor am i optimistic about someone based on how they look.
I don't agree with not exposing them. Alot of people know there is something off about them. If somebody had told me what it was about them I would of been able to see through them sooner. It was interesting how I picked up narc traits but because he was a covert narc his ability to show emotions threw me. If somebody had told me about covert narcissism it definitely would have been an Aha moment.
I did a video 3 years ago about the Religious Narcissist ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-HBEHqoF8f0w.html And before that (4 years ago) I did a video on the church being a Hot Spot for Covert Narcissists ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-irrjjHJ2f4U.html
Pls , what you recommend me if I have videos how she sleeps with many man on the weeks , and her dother sleeping in the other room . She can be very angry and what can happen with me after.
Narcissist are unpredictable,I belive in spiritual stuffs a lot,to truely understand them you peoples get there birth date and find out there true personalites by the help of zodiac signs...