The script Here at Dave's Creamery and Creamatorium, we like to keep things happening. Except for the corpses, those didn't happen, we swear, they were like that when you brought them here. We have our hand on the pulse of the ice cream world as well as the bodies due to that recent court decision. And one thing that is happening right now are those frozen yogurt places where you mix the stuff in. So, to keep up with the times, and NOT to distract you from the screaming protesters out front, we are happy to announce a Frozen yogurt bar, complete with mix-ins. Come on in and enjoy a nice cup of Goodbye Granny Smith Apple, and mix in a big heap of raspberries, strawberries, mini candy tombstones, chocolate pieces, dirt, fruity bobas, bits of granite, or nuts. And don't forget about our other delicious flavors, like Caramel Ripple Mortis, Chocolate Chip Cookie Don't Ask Why We Can't Visit Uncle Ted Anymore, Kids I Think It's Time You Learned About Death By Chocolate, and Daddy's Done For Dulce de Leche. But why stop at ice creams mix in's, throw in some colorful pebbles, tiny cars, yo-yos, lincoln logs, quarters, or those butterscotch candies with Grandpa's ashes and the kids won't be able to tell the difference from the real thing. So run, don't mourn, on down to Dave's Creamery and Crematorium, where the only thing colder than our tasty treats is the inevitable grasp of death's icy cold hand. It comes for us all, it comes for us all.
