De-Influencing, Consumerism, And How To Shop In A Broken System 

As a 50-year-old woman, I've learned these three things about style: 1. You're never done. EVER. You're continually evolving, and so is your style. 2. Your house and/or closet can get cooler and more individual as you get older. To look at my house, you'd think I have money. What I actually have is a thirty-year history of hitting thrift stores. 3. Focusing on YOUR style instead of what's IN style saves you a ton of money. As a middle aged woman, I don't much care what's in style, as long as I love what I wear. Each of us gets to choose how much we engage with current fashion trends: a lot, a little, or not at all.

That bit about how we go to museums and can just enjoy looking without needing to own it: EXACTLY. That is my approach to shopping, I just enjoy looking.

I feel like we're losing our own personality when it comes to fashion now. There's so much copy/paste looks these days. I really like finding things that I'm personally drawn to and wear it as many times as I can, styled in different ways.

The conversation around buying a style without living the lifestyle that inspires it rings true. Subculture gets diluted as a result. Presentation thru style can signal to other people that you may likely share common interests, and it feels really bizarre and disappointing when you approach that person and realize you don't actually have anything to connect over; you just look similar.

This guest is an analogy QUEEN! 👑 Getting to know your clothes like you'd see a friend in different contexts, the sushi restaurant of style...those are going to stick with me.

I've never seen or heard of this guest before, but her communication and engagement skills are top-notch. Loved listening to her interview!

I absolutely love this, “is it style or is she just thin?”

The best thing about getting older with fashion, besides feeling much more grounded in my personal style, is I’m at the age where I can see trends come back around from a time that I can actually remember. It makes me feel so much more comfortable buying things in high-quality natural fibers knowing that even if I decide to put it away to keep with the trends, it’ll come back around eventually and I’ll still have it.

This guest is terrific, more like this please!

As someone who works in fashion "playing with silhouettes" is just a modern and more acceptable way of saying "styling yourself in a way that is flattering to you". It's completely okay to have a personal style that is flattering to you, and often we naturally lean towards styles that complement our body, undertones, hair styles, etc and PAIR that with comfort and environmental influences.

"Just because it isn't complete doesn't mean I can't be satisfied" wow I had to write that one down. Words to live by.

The tending your garden and dressing for your circumstance talk is giving me biiiig Hannah Louise Poston vibes! I feel like a group dialogue of slow fashion/mindful consumption creators would be amazing to witness (HLP, Heather, Christina Mychas come to mind)!

Wow! That really landed with me. As a 40-something feminist boy mom who loves fashion and art and yet, is also deeply troubled by the state of the world (consumerism and my own part in it, climate change, disconnection, etc etc), hearing the two of you talk for the last hour gave me such big hope for the future. My favorite interview from TFD yet.

I absolutely loved this conversation. I’ve been living like this for the past 5 years and not only have I developed my own style within my lifestyle, but I’m saving money by searching and looking for the ideal pieces that would fit into my life. Love the chemistry

I'm an "older milennial" and i still to this DAY shape what i wear around my alter ego - the pear shape.

16:36 “if we’re all naked, how do we express ourselves?” tattoos come to mind. ever since humans figured out how to do them. but then those can be even MORE expensive 😅

As an Arkansan with plantar fasciitis I appreciate this discussion! 😂 I do strive to be authentic with my personal style, and to find balance between trend/influencer led shopping and minimalist/capsule wardrobe dressing.

Thrifting is my favourite way to shop, but I'm so time poor now. I don't have time to browse through clothing and try them on. Using a personal stylist to shop for me and help me find quality, timeless pieces for a capsule wardrobe that reflect my style while also incorporating trends was a great investment.

I absolutely adored this video!! It made me feel a lot better about myself and the life I lead. Social Media can make you feel so bad about yourself. I see twenty-something olds running huge empires and making millions and sometimes it makes me feel like I should be doing major things when I don't. I actually love my job at the hospital and really enjoy fashion, even though I don't go to fancy events. There's always an excuse to dress nicely right. This video was so funny as well. You two have great chemistry and you made me laugh a lot!

The Robin Egg Blue Fox Fur Coat story, and aspirational pieces in general always snap my mind back to that movie “The Green Scarf” I think that was the name or like shopaholic movie. It was such a good film to watch and really understand hyperconsumerism and how it ruins our financial life but also our relationships.

Wow - Heather, I'm blown away by your maturity and the way you're living your life. I just turned 50 and I'm finally figuring out this stuff. I totally admire and respect what you're doing. Looking you up on IG right now.

What's hopeful that if enough young people get on the personal style and mindful consumption train, that's DECADES of items they never buy, compared to other folks who mindlessly consumed for a much longer period of time.

This TFC is one of the best I've watched. So organic and refreshing to see. Thank you!

Great guest and very interesting discussion 😍 Really enjoyed it!

What an incredibly well spoken person - I am so keen to follow her now. Thanks for getting people like this on the program!

This was such a good conversation. Very thought-provoking and I'm super inspired

what a perfect crossover, been fans of both of you for years! Great guest and interview :)

HEATHER!!!!! My favorite favorite lady on the internet!!! I’m so excited for this conversation 🥰💕

I work in the influencer marketing space and this was such a pleasant way to remove myself a bit and look at it with a fresh perspective for my own mental state. Loved this, thank you!

Yay love Heather! Such unique content and great advice for style.

First of all, Ive been thrifting since the 80s. Still buy a ton of clothes from vintage and thrift shops. Second, how do people pay for health insurance if you don't have a full-time job? I would be more willing to try to expand my business, but I don't know how I'd pay for health insurance if I leave my job.

The collab I didn’t know I needed!!!!

This was such a good conversation! Two of my favorite creators

Two of my passions combined together in the best way! Fashion and finance. Great video, love the nuanced discussion on how they intertwine.

Obsessed with this episode!

Loved this episode!!

Is there a list anywhere of some of the older women Chelsea follows? I'd like to surround myself with that, as well. I started following women in larger bodies (like myself) years ago and it has done so much good toward unlearning internalized fatphobia and self-hate. Would love to do this with aging, too!

This was so awesome they literally touched on EVERYTHING

You two were made to be friends :) A meeting of minds and a fun convo

What a thoughtful, mature and well spoken guest

I really enjoyed this conversation!

If I could like this video multiple times I would. Both of these women are so aspirational, well spoken with nuanced and mature opinions. I loved the conversation. I don't have tiktok, so I can't follow pigmami, I'm gonna miss out on her mantras and metaphores (eg: comparing styles to bus vs sushi belt), but I'm going to take the idea to use these methods to make ideas more sticky and easily digestible with me and adapt it in my work. Thank you both ⭐

Loved this conversation!!

Oh my lands Chelsea, THANK YOU for saying these influencers don't mention just how much of what they have as part of their aesthetic in life was part of brand deals as you mentioned. That is a privilege! I think if people would be open, transparent, and honest enough to say, "Hey community, I have X, Y, Z and it was part of deals and would cost about $$-$$$ to acquire. I want to acknowledge my privilege of being offered these items....", then there would be more trust. I actually started to lose interest in certain RU-vidrs because I noticed over time they don't acknowledge how their privilege got them to where they are in life. Let's be honest, as I speak with friends from other countries, specifically in South America, I have to acknowledge to them my level of privilege being born in, growing up in, and living in the United States. It takes courage, humility, and bravery for a person to call that out in a public format. Values, specifically humility, we have lost as a society.

My style esthetic is flare leg pants, jeans/yoga pants/tailored pants--a knit top, tees in summer, cashmere/wool sweaters in winter. I've developed that over years and it's what I stick to. I have a couple of skirts and midi-length dresses that I never/ever/ ever/ wear. I am 80 years old.

At some point the older decent quality clothing will be gone, so what happens to thrifting then? Most of the new clothes don't even last a season, much less a year.

Love love love Heather 🤍🤍🤍

"Taste is more than just an aesthetic decision." Holy moly YES! I cannot tell you how often I've seen influencer content that just does not ring true to me simply because I live in the frozen tundra of the Midwest and I know I could wear that outfit for about a week in July. It's not that I don't love the looks they create, simply it does not fit the lifestyle I lead or the person that I am. Well said.

Yes Heather!!!

the funniest thing is when you're watching Heather explain about fashion being like a sushi restaurant conveyor belt and youtube cuts in with advertisement that comletely disagrees. YOU NEED TO BUY THIS NOW

looove this video thank u

Pretty much all the stuff in my apartment is from Marketplace, Ikea, or both (vintage Ikea from when their wood was better). My girlfriend and I frequent the return-section to look for deals. We found a carpet that was great looking, with a great price. It's almost a year later I'm still not sure where it belongs, but we will make it work somehow.

GAH! I could watch you all day, Chelsea!

eight mile! i come for the financial talk, but stay for chelsea's references!

It’s from the great gatsby and it’s about how a man lost all his money

I should be taking notes while watching this. And then want to be an influencer securing the bag with sponsored content. Idk I’m scared Mom can you pick me up?

I live in Ohio and style is a completely different language here. The majority of the time, everyone wants to blend in with "safe and normal clothes" which is usually a standard set by what white college kids are wearing, very American Ivy of us. Modesty is also a huge thing here, and people will judge teenage girls for "showing too much skin" way more harshly than they would judge someone for wearing something "ugly". But I think people here are also a lot more afraid of negative attention than they should be, because when everyone else is spending all their time trying to look the same and you just put that energy elsewhere, it's easy to stand out in a positive way too.

Hehe, I'm a cosplay dork and often rotate pieces in with my normal clothes to fun effect. Why save that fabulous coat for Comic Con when it looks groovy right now? 🥰

oh wow I already followed her but didn't make the connection 😆 really great conversation!

The slicked back bun reminds me of a teacher I had in art school who was famous for her terrible character. She always wore this kind of bun, and had quite a prominent nose as well. I, being the mean girl that I was, nicknamed her the Goose. It stuck and she didn't really like me for some reason 😅. Wherever I see that hairstyle I remember the Goose.

I’m definitely at the point in my life where I want quality over quantity! I do buy the quality items when they are on sale as well. I’m 35. I got stuff from Boxing Day sales but now I probably won’t buy anything for 6months.

I am notoriously unaware of trends, I don't really care much, but really, I just don't pay attention. Only in my 40s did I become more conscious, found my style & started to allow myself that style. Psst...not trendy. 😉

Yup. I just sold my chanel classic flap bc that is an item that does not fit with the reality of my life. Sold it and will buy stocks

We are praying for you🙏🏽🙏🏽😇

“i had roaches” 😂😂😂 i love heathers honesty

What she mentioned about the person's wardrobe being like an archive of their life reminds me of why I love decorating my Christmas tree. This was my first year decorating with my husband and I loved telling him the little stories behind some of the ornaments. I'm not someone who follows fashion/beauty accounts to really know what is trendy, and I don't shop for clothes often. (Although recently when I started a new job that was fully in office I discovered I needed more cool weather dressy clothes!) I focus on what I like and what I think looks good on me. When I try stuff on at the store, my current point of view is that if I have *any* doubts about how it looks or feels while I'm still in the fitting room, that's a sign not to get it because I probably won't wear it often. All that being said, I am so glad flared jeans are back in style because trying to hunt them down when skinny jeans were in style was rough!!

Personally, I shop with flattery in mind first and then preference, but that to me defines comfortability. I used to live in trends, until I noticed how much I was spending on them! Now I am very much about what do I like on me and what defines that for me. If I am uncomfortable, no matter the item or trend, I say no. This inevitably makes me less trendy, but more “fashionable” because I am active about wearing what I like on me.

Thin is also relative. Y’all may not be BS model thin, but you still appear very much slender to my eyes. Hardy midwesterner here. 😂

“I had roaches”😂😂 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Really enlightening and reassuring listen :) thank you!

becoming poor really helped me to curb consumption. and I mean poor, not broke.

I agree- the "struggle BUN" not aesthetically pleasing

Great video, The first $100,000 invested was amazing. But when you hit $300,000 it’s like smashing the glass ceiling! I cried.

I love how they take digs at each other 😂

Slowly and then all at once is a take off from The Sun Also Rises. John Green is riffing on Hemingway.

Chelsea: 0:55 Me at home in MD, just getting back from my job on Wisconsin Ave: 😳 THE STARS ARE ALIGNING CHELSEA 😂 Way to manifest girl!! hahaha

Dumpster Doggy is the absolute best 🙌 💰

Diana Vreeland Vogue Editor from the 1970s said something like: "We don't just want the dress, we want the life of the girl who wears the dress." This seems to define aspirational dressing. I think it's understandable in the young, but in older people it's a bit sad. If you haven't refined your style to something more realistic, then you're just Miss Havisham, dressed in her wedding dress, suspended in time pining and, waiting for an event that is not going to happen. I mean this particularly about more expensive occasion dressing. But I know someone who regularly buys party dresses and extreme designer clothes which she never wears. She has a roomful of them. This strikes me as sad.

what's the name of the influencer that had a crazy life in la and new york? i want to follow her

sometimes i watch videos like this and wonder.... what Chelsey would think of my lifestyle. lmao

STELLA WHO? I WANT TO FOLLOW ALL THESE PEOPLE!

Talking about being simple is the new trend 😂

Yes🎉🎉🎉🎉😅

🤦 A fox fur coat?! I’m horrified but very curious to hear the story behind it.

Criticizes old money aesthetic… while wearing old money aesthetic

Smart, interesting convo but i found the constant disclaimers kind of annoying. Felt like both were constantly trying not to offend anyone over any opinion they had which betrays the childish, petulant nature of society rn. I agree with most if not all points, though. I personally find that style is almost dead in many parts of the US. Conformity is king and the ppl who "seem" stylish online are really just corporate sell-outs hawking free products for a check. They don't wear that stuff outside unless it's for a photograph/video/what have you. They're completely inauthentic and narcissistic which means their style is inauthentic and predicated on narcissism, or rather, it's entire formation/construction is made on the basis of being seen for likes and views versus a true expression of self. But, style cannot be inauthentic which means they have no style. They wear what they're told or what's trendy at the moment. Take Sabrina Brier on tiktok. Pretty girl, funny comedian. Every single video she wears a new stunning outfit. Every video there are 1000+ comments asking her where she got her clothes. Hmmm. How does a relatively new, tiktok comedian afford to never repeat an outfit? Hmmm. How does a new york comedian afford a big enough closet to house an entire store's worth of outfits? Is it really that she's that stylish and rich? Or are companies sending her free stuff to get tons of views and then have people copy her style and buy it? And, of course, this is all driven by rampant capitalism and corporations who want to make it normal to constantly be buying, to constantly feel like you don't have enough, to constantly feel like you need the NEXT big trend which is wildly different than the last one you chased. Buy buy buy. It's ruining the planet, ruining fashion, ruining individuality, and ruining our minds.

Personally, I disagree with the flattering vs playing with silhouettes. It’s the same thing… abolishing those rules isn’t helpful. I noticed in this talk there was a lot of pandering to insecure women and disclaimers like “it’s ok if everyone wears a slick back bun tho!!” No. It’s not. It’s not ok for everyone to have the exact same hair style. It’s weird, dystopian, and creepy. But unfortunately you weren’t able to stand on your real thoughts and beliefs. Also, no, it’s not ok to wear unflattering things just because you want to. It’s not stylish. Being stylish and shopping with intention takes these things into account such as shape, size, and even color. If you’re pale as hell then maybe a color you really like will wash you out and look horrible. That doesn’t mean do it anyway because you like it. Maybe that color is better for a ring or shoes and not all over your body. This comes down to understanding your body and simple style intelligence. If you’re 350 pounds maybe a baby T crop top isn’t the best option. So what if you love it? You’ll look like a clown. No one will tell that to you, but they’ll think it. Looking ridiculous and uninformed/clueless does not equate to empowerment or being stylish. Style is predicated on individuality, yes, even eccentricity, but it always SUITS and FLATTERS the wearer. Botched and ill fitting clothes are not stylish. Your body does not make everything work. And stop with the thin thing. A thin, flat woman with no breasts and no butt will NEVER pull off a voluptuous dress like Beyoncé or Megan thee stallion can. Nope! It will give cutting board and many people do not want to sleep with a cutting board. Different bodies work different clothes in different ways and if you don’t account for that you’ll look like a fool.

I pay RU-vid premium so I don’t have to get ads and it’s so frustrating to have the actual show insert all these stupid ads in the middle. Unsubscribing

Very confused how one can have a degree in kinesiology and public health? Kinesiology has no scientific basis and proven over and over not to work. This casts doubt on the public health component if part of same degree, or at very least indicates cognitive dissonance .

She’s 26?? No way! She looks late 30s.. god help gen z! They’re aging like bananas

📌Your channel is great MAte, the market has been dump!ng and pump!ng in this range for ages! It's technically just going sideways, sideways means generally stagnant. More emphasis should be put into day trading, as it less affected by the unpredictable nature of the market. Trading has been going smooth for me as I was able to raise over 4 BTC when I started at 1 BTC in just few weeks implementing Tan Bryson daily trading signals and strategy...