Dealing With the Pain of Loss 

“Anybody that has the ability to bring us great grief when they’re gone, that was somebody who had the strength to bring us great joy when they were here, and so embrace the joy” loved that.❤️

As I sat at my mothers grave sobbing, I get the notification that you posted this. Your timing couldn’t have been better. Thank you

The price we pay for the ability to love is the excruciating pain we experience when that love is lost.

My husband dropped dead in front of me 2018. The pain I've been in since has pushed me almost to the point of insanity. My heart goes out to anyone here who is currently suffering the grief of any kind of loss. ❤

Grief changes us. The pain sculpts us into someone who understands more deeply, hurts more often, appreciates more quickly, cries more easily, loves more openly. ~Unknown

Dwayne, although I'm 49 and my father just passed in June of 2023; (I miss him sooo much beyond what I can explain), I receive your words as gold. Had I taken his advice when I was 19 I'd be retired now, enjoying my wife and children on the land with our animals. I'm a business owner and although I am thankful, I am non-stop going and wish I could just be on the land with them. I always loved talking with him and listening to him in the latter part of my life. Now that I will receive it better, he's unfortunately no longer with us.... I turn to your videos to fulfill what I still needed to hear from my father 😢 "only something capable of bringing us such great joy, can bring us great pain" 😢😢 Thank you sir

Just lost my good boy Nugget a black German Shepard this week. Only 6 months old but the best friend a man could ask for. This was a timely, comforting and wise message to receive. Peace and Blessings to you and all at your homestead sir.

I’m 20, I’m about to lose my friend Mr C, 86. He only has a few days left and I’ve been non stop balling my eyes out since I found out. Today I spent the whole day driving around listening to Frank Sinatra (his favorite), singing along, thinking about all the good memories I’ve shared with him, all the lessons that he taught me, all the stories he’s told. He’s the happiest most fulfilled person I’ve ever met in my life. Never complained, always had a smile on his face, a story or joke to tell. Just a ray of sunshine, an undeniably beautiful soul and an absolute joy to be around. Embrace the Joy ❤ I pray that the lord has mercy on your soul Mr C. I will never forget you. I will see you in heaven my friend ❤🕊️

Lost my Mom 3 years ago and it is still hard dealing with her loss. She was my best friend and my greatest mentor.

I lost my Grandfather 12 hrs ago, he was my everything. It was my highest honor to serve him in his final years. It hurts in an unbelievable way but I find solitude in standing strong for my family. People are depending on me, I would go through hell a thousand times for them. So we must move forward - if you're going through something similar I'm praying for you. Thank you for posting this video, it found me - not the other way around.

Lost my pops 3 weeks ago. I can honestly say he was my best friend, and I loved him dearly, but he left a mess behind. I've had to take on a lot of responsibility, and be stronger than ever. Looking forward to this well timed video. Thank you, Dewayne.

Thank you. Lost a treasured animal monday, and it's hard. Sorry for your loss.

Face them fears. I feared being alone So isolated from everything I feared hunger So I fasted I feared death because of my chronic illness So I contemplated it since childhood I feared weakness because I was the youngest and called "the baby" So I prayed for a hard life to make me stronger and give praise to the most high for all trials and tribulations I have undertaken and pray for some more I refuse to break under any circumstances.

I lost my mom on February 25th she was 68 and been battling cancer since past year, this last year was typically hard . I miss her soo much , I don’t want to do anything , just doing my duties for my kids and wife, but God, this hurts my heart so much 😢

I watched this when it came out a couple weeks ago. It actually really helped me with the loss of my 18 year old cat. Thank you. RIP Tigger 2006-2024

Just learned yesterday that my dad has 4 to 6 months to live. 1 year at most. This will help. Thank you

I am so sorry you had to put your horse down. Some pets and animals feel like your kids. It hurts when they die.

Thanks for loving your horse enough to put her down when you heard she'd never heal and be in misery. That is the kindest thing you can do for your beloved pets.

My mom passed in 2018, and I held her hand as she took her last breath. It hurt like hell. I didn't want to see her go, but in a way, I was happy for her. She was in a lot of pain and was very sick. I didnt want to see her suffer like that and she didn't deserve to. There's something that changes you when you see the person that gave birth to you die.

My grandfather was riding his bike yesterday and was killed when he was T boned by a pick up truck who wasn’t paying attention. This helps me so much thank you so much I’ve watched you for years and you remind me a lot of him and other respectable men I’ve had in my life. Thank you sir best wishes

Dwayne thanks so much for the story you shared about having to deliver devastating news to your son. The lowest point in my life was sitting my 4 children down in 2021 and telling them their mother had passed and was in heaven. It was deeply traumatic and still is. I watch your videos on a regular basis and I find strength,comfort, and knowledge.

I'd hoped I wouldn't need this video so soon, but... I've lost another Great Uncle. The other day, he passed in the morning. I've tried to keep my mind off of it. It hasn't been easy. Thank you, Dewayne. Your words have had a lasting impact on me and many others.

Animals might possibly be in heaven. I used to doubt it until I discovered the last words of Roy Rogers. 🤔 I believe he's with Trigger, Bullet, Buttermilk, and Dale. Just a thought, sir. My condolences and all the best to y'all.

The timing of this video, wow I can’t even explain.

We put our 10 year old German shepherd down last November. Oh man it was tough. He was a different dog. We've had many shepherds and he was just so full of love and loyal, More than any other dog we have had. He loved his family. Hope yous are doing well Dwayne. Its hard losing an animal.

Horses, men, women, family, etc with it not mattering what they are, but it is what they represented. My Dad passed last year unexpectedly and I still can't believe that he is gone. There are days where I see him walking with other families metaphorically around parks or towns. There are days where I swear I can hear his voice coming from somewhere else. It is crazy the hole that they leave once they are gone. To those who recently lost a loved one, talking about it helps significantly. It still hurts and it forever will, but at least time helps play a role in mitigating that pain as you get used to it. Honor their memory.

I'm so sorry, prayers for comfort. I lost my husband to cancer in '22, still doesn't seem real.

I've lost a few horses over the years. First one I lost was Thunder. Quarab. Bad to the bone horse. I was riding beside the road, heading back home because it started raining. A tractor trailer drove by and blew his air horn (peckerhead). Thunder reared up and when he came back down, he snapped his front ankle on the wet hillside. I then fell off and he ran across the road and then back towards me, but hit the guardrail and basically ripped his leg off on it. Sad day. My boy's mom told me they were shocked when they saw me crying because they'd never seen me cry. Of course the tractor was not working at the time, so I buried that horse with a shovel. I miss ol Thunder. Good to see ya Dewayne

So sorry to hear about the loss of your horse. I respect you for making this video, I believe it will help others. Mercy and kindness are virtues. You have shown us both by your actions of your guidance on this difficult subject. May God Continue to guide you. Thank You.

I lost my dog, Leroy from when I was still in school, he was the best friend I could've asked for, he was injured by an irresponsible dog owner who couldn't leash his dog. I took down the other dog, but not in time. Poor guy passed soon after. I miss him greatly.

Drugs are taking so many young people! Very sad times in America! The drugs are flooding our Beautiful country! People need to pay attention to the young people in their families! God Bless America

Grateful for good horses...we need to be good stewards of our animals , care for them, and love them....

Beautiful message from a beautiful human. Sorry to hear about your mare, sir.

Thank you for posting this I needed to hear this, this video was uploaded 2 days before my grandpa's funeral. He lost his fight with cancer and was a strong good man. I was thankful for me and my brothers to be given the honor to be the urn bearers at his funeral service.

I just lost my long term relationship of 3 years and I’ve been more lost than I ever been in my entire life and this video happened to show in my feed. I’ve followed you a long time but I needed this thank you

I really needed this. For several years I road a beautiful Percheron horse. The owner sold her and I have been grieving ever since. Loss comes in many forms... I am blessed with all the beautiful memories! Thank you for your kind words and helping me process the loss.

Thank you Dewayne

This video DID help me. Thank you for your time and wisdom. I'm sorry for the loss of Rae. I sure miss my Foxy At Heart but I did right by her. For 15 years

I lost a close friend in August of 2023 and he loved your videos. As I’ve been lost in my grief I’ve found myself watching your videos to find his voice in yours, this video did everything for me. I can see this video was hard for you but I want you to know the moment you mentioned losing a friend in a car accident (as I did as well) I knew he wanted me to see this. Thank you so much for sharing this 🤍🤍

My wife and I have been together for 34 years and we have always had dogs, cats and sometimes horses as well as a multitude of other things. Early on we agreed that we would always honor our animals by making hard decisions with the thought of quality over quantity. We have had dogs that have gotten old and maybe weren't living their best life but they still enjoyed being part of our pack. In those cases we always let them tell us when it was time and every single one of them did. We could just read in them when it was time, when they just weren't having fun anymore. Loss is hard, it just is. I agree with you that the way to deal with loss is to remember the more positive times. I know everyone has heard this probably hundreds of times but I'm going to say it again. Don't put off clearing the air or letting people know how you feel about them. Your time for doing and saying what you should will run out faster than you think it will. My Dad and I rarely saw eye to eye, both hard headed and neither going to be the one that took the initiative and started the process of healing the past. After he died, I hurt more because of things not said then I actually did from his death. He lived into his 80s and every bit of his life was lived his way. I think he felt like he had a good life and when it was over, I was at peace with his passing but I still deal with the fact that neither of us ever really told each other how we felt about each other. I love my Dad. I just wasn't wired the same way as him. Anyway, tell those you love how you feel and put those hurt feeling to rest while you still have time. Thank you for sharing this. I really like that you are mentoring, that doesn't happen much anymore. I could have used someone that would teach me some of these things when I was coming up.

Today is my mom and aunt's birthday (twins!) They both died years ago i was a child when i lost my aunt and barely a teen when my mother died. This video means everything to me right now. Thank you so much.

That really, really, really sucks to have to had to put her down!! Life is so unfair!! Poor, poor Horse! At least she's not suffering. May she Rest in Peace.

There's a Cormac McCarthy quote that was introduced to me at a time when I was overcome with grief: “It was the nature of his profession that his experience with death should be greater than for most and he said that while it was true that time heals bereavement it does so only at the cost of the slow extinction of those loved ones from the heart's memory which is the sole place of their abode then or now. Faces fade, voices dim. Seize them back, whispered the sepulturero [gravedigger]. Speak with them. Call their names. Do this and do not let sorrow die for it is the sweetening of every gift.” ― Cormac McCarthy, The Crossing So very sorry for your loss. I have next to zero horse experience, but one thing that has always hit me hard is how one could have a dog or other pet and it suffer an injury and there is a lot you can do to help that dog recover. But the size and the nature of horses makes those recoveries essentially impossible. Such a hard pill to swallow.

I lost my grandmother last month, in the day of my wedding... And these words really help

I like to think we'll see our animals again, as a wonderful surprise from our Creator...hope so.

I'm so glad you decided to do this video, your words have helped this grieving widow. Thank you💔

I’ve been following you for a while now. I’m just a 32 year old female in Kentucky. But when I woke up this morning scrolling on Facebook , a dear friend and ex of mine passed away last night. He wasn’t even 35 years old…..I literally just found out, then I go on here to find a video to listen to while I get ready for work and this is the first video on my feed. No such thing as a coincidence Thank you.

You are right. I lost 47 mares and 2 stallions. I miss them a lot… but they still alive in my heart and memory… I miss them a lot…

Sad story about your son's horse. Totally out of our control. Never easy to lose an animal that has been a companion.

Thank you for doing this. Perfect timing for me, having lost my gelding less than two weeks ago. His passing was a lot easier on me than my mare’s. He was gone by the time I got out to the pasture. My mare was down and wouldn’t get up even to get into the trailer. My vet didn’t make house calls on Sundays, so I had to shoot her. I don’t remember feeling recoil or hearing the shot, just seeing the muzzle flash.

Thank you, Duanne. I lost my first wife back in the early 90s. I knew what the end result was going to be. That was a little bit comforting but not much. I had a decision to make either sit there and more about it or carry on with my life, raising my young son. I had to choosebetween those two choices. Today I’m still kicking. Thanks. The father and my son has grown up now. It’s all about a mindset. It’s all up to you. God bless brother.

I don't typically buy books from Content Creators, as when I have, they felt very rushed and it was clear they were out for the money. But I can't wait for your book Dewayne! I hope everything is going well and I hope Mouse's brain is starting to wake up.

Great video. I disagree about animals not having a place in heaven however. The only reason I have to believe otherwise God simply wouldn't/couldn't make a true heaven for me if Roy wasn't there. A quick story that I'm sure will be lost in the comments, but: I went through a divorce several years ago, and I kept Roy. We got really close over the next few years and for a good portion of it he was my only reason for getting up every morning. I had to make sure he had a good day, and that got me moving. Over that time I found someone else, and got remarried. With no health issues whatsoever, he stopped eating and passed away a month after we got married. I can't help but think he was sent into my life at the right time to get me through the dark and into the good times again. He knew I was in a good place and he didn't have to watch over me anymore and was called home.

Your exhortation is so true. “The price we pay for love is grief.” -Queen Elizabeth

Wow! So sorry for the loss of your horse. You do have my deepest sympathy. However, Until one suffers the loss of a child they cannot truly feel the pain of loss. My son, at age 27 lost his life. He was beat up and left for dead outside on a snow covered sidewalk in 9 degree temps on New Years Day 09'. Brent's lungs filled with his own blood and he drowned. That is the pain of loss! Fast forward nine years. We had an adopted daughter, had her since she was 18 months old, such a brilliant girl, straight A's all through school, went to college on grants and scholarship's. But Maria seemed to lack common sense. Some low life guy got ahold of her and got her messed up in drugs. Well, long story short, Maria was found dead on May 3ed 18', stabbed 17 times! What happened to our sweet sweet little girl!! That is the pain of loss! Needless to say my wife isn't the same. Oh and at the same time of Marias death my wife had breast cancer! How does a guy go on with life? Minute by minute, Day by day.... It is a heavy load!!

Thank you for your effort. No one on RU-vid brings as much hurtful truth as you. God bless Dwayne.

Sorry to hear that, folks! Our pets and beasts can become like parts of our families!

Talk about loss. I've lost a lot. My Biological Mom at 8 years old and my Step Mom at 23 and the last 5 years my Dad. During the 5 years I lost my Aunt and Uncle too. It's been a very tough 5 years losing so many lose ones. I understand that now I'm 60 years old, I have lost many Aunts and Uncles along the way. It doesn't make life any easier but so much harder to try to live on without loved ones. It's all about the loneliness now. Even though I have a wife and daughter, we are not close at all. There is nothing there and after 31 years one would think a bond would be formed but it wasn't. They are more about themselves. Even over 31 years is half my life, I honestly think it's time to go our own way. It's a damn shame though but if it brings happiness then it should be done. I want the rest of my life to be happy, no drama. I hope it's out there! Thanks Dwayne for the eye opener!

Found this video at a time in need. You are very wise.

Sorry for the loss of your horse. Thank you for sharing and especially from a Christian perspective. I appreciate it!

When you have to put down an animal, that makes it so much harder than a natural death. It is always hard. Being the one that has to make that decision, is hard. So much harder. But, you have to do what is best for them. You give them the best possible life. And loving them. Making them family. And unfortunately, sometimes there comes a time we have to make the tough decision. Sometimes much sooner than we had planned. We have to do what is best for them. As hard as it is. Horse. Dog. Any animal. It is the worst part of life! Great thoughts. This is true. Great joy does not come without risk of great pain. Only knowing we gave them the best possible life. Can ease our pain. Thank you for sharing. Sorry for your loss.

Sorry for your loss. I’ve lost 2 of my most treasured horses. One I had to put down and my stud died while I was away. My nephew was looking after him for me and found him dead as he went to feed him. He was devastated as I was but he lived a very good life and was 23 years old. Never had any problems with him. He would stay behind a 3 strand fence form the mares and colts. Just don’t put a mare inside the fence with him. Lol

Lost Molly yesterday, my first jersey. She was 15yr old. She went lame and I’d been treating her for about a year because the vet said sometimes they will heal. Her stifle joint did not heal & she was on pain medication daily. She was one spoiled cow. Molly let me learn to hand milk and provided the best best milk to which I learned to make cheeses, butter, yogurt and such. Fattened hogs on whey and extra milk too. So many good memories with her in the milk parlor before dawn.

The pain i felt when to have my cat put to sleep at the beginning of covid restrictions was unbearable. I couldnt be with him. He was only 2. I cried and screamed. Im so so sorry for your loss and the way it happened. Your videos give me strength ❤

As a teenager I was too scared to say goodbye to my great grandfather on his deathbed. My grandfather told me with tears in his eyes that “He’ll understand.” I hope so, because I regret it.

I really appreciate this video. Loss on a farm is hard to deal with, and not many people talk about it. Thank you

Your timing is impeccable sir. My family is making the decision to put my 15 yr old american eskimo down due to seizures and old age, we don't want our fella to suffer anymore. The good life he had outweighted the bad times we had.

Sorry to hear that Mr.Noel I remember when you picked Joey and I up at the airport you were telling us about how you just picked her up the day before. She was beautiful horse and after being there I know she lived the best life she could by being with you

I am 26 y.o and I have lost my mother since 9. Only now I begin to fathom the impact that such an event can have to a young adult, in his relationships. Be aware and experience the pain, only bad things will come from trying to bury the feelings.

Just buried my 16 year old black lab last year and I can tell I’m gonna have to burry my going to be 16 year old yellow lab this year! All that matters is they lived their best life’s!!!💪🦅💯🇺🇸

The video really helped me, thank you

Thank you for this video. It’s helping a lot of us who silently suffer with excruciating grief ❤

Thank you for addressing this difficult topic. You did right by Rae...by staying strong. This excerpt from 'A Horse's Prayer' has helped me thru years of loss. It underscores your wisdom and empathy: "....when my useful strength is gone, do not turn me out to starve or freeze, or sell me to some cruel owner, to be slowly tortured and starved to death, but do thou, My Master, take my life in the kindest way, and your God will reward you here and hereafter. You will not consider me irreverent if I ask this in the name of Him who was born in a stable." ~author unknown ~

A true man, smoking a genuine cigar beside the old good fire. Best regards from Spain.

I started watching your videos because my bought a place with 5 acres and fenced off with stalls and my girlfriend brought down her 2 horses she had at her grandpas farm. Not going to lie, I used to hate horses and was scared of them. Now they're just part of the family and I love sitting on the porch and just watching them. I hope you are wrong about not getting to see our animals again though I sure miss my passed dogs and cats.

We had to put down our Granddaughters pony on Saturday. It was a tough weekend. Thank you for the words of encouragement...

My condolences to you and mama. I remember when you brought Rae home. Some 48 years ago I lost my first horse, Tootsie Roll. I think I posted the incident on here. It was tough but we got through it. Thank you for talking about a hard subject. Cowboy up.

Thank You Dwayne. My deepest sympathy for the loss of your horse. I understand we all have an expiration date. Our Heavenly Father has been helping me with the loss of many here recently, my best friend Steve passed 6 months ago. Your video was confirmation of remembering the joy those special people blessed me with and to keep my faith that we will be together again. Greatly appreciate y'all. Stay safe. God Bless Y'all. Love and Prayers For All.

Thank you Dwayne. Sorry for your loss.

Thank you Dewayne for this message.

Thank you for posting this, Sir.

Sorry for the loss of your horse. That's always a tough deal.

🙋So sorry for your loss. 😢Bless her heart 🐎 and yours as well. Thank you for sharing. God Bless.

I needed to hear this. Thank you Dry Creek.

Thanks for your help!

Condolences to you and Mama.❤

Sincere condolences on this loss.

I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your horse. I know how hard that can be. Two weeks ago, I had to put a horse down who had been a personal friend of ours for many years. Ol' Tom was one of those rare horses; a friend, a teacher, curious and always into something. But finally, part of loving that old horse was to look after him when it was obvious that he was ready to go. It's part of having these magnificent creatures, I guess, but it's not easy.

You don't know how much you help me on my journey on spaceship Earth. I really love you, old sea dog. Love from Germany.

First, I to express my condolences to Dwayne. Sorry for your loss. I can tell this is tough for him in the way his talking. Whether or not there is an afterlife for us or animals it does not take away the bond we form with them while we are both here now. And sometimes that one or two come along and that bond is so great. I am getting choked up right now thinking about a beautiful soul dog I lost a year and a half ago watching this video. So, Dwayne and maybe your wife too, I wish you both so much comfort and good thoughts.

Thank you so much for this video...I needed this.

Thank you so much for your videos!

Sorry to hear what happened. Very sad. Thank you for your wisdom and perspective how to deal with the pain of loss.

Sorry for your loss, thank you and God bless y'all.

Thank you for sharing your wisdom with all of us. Your time and wisdom is much appreciated.

I am always greatful for your insight, Dwayne. Thank you for doing this channel.

Beautiful reflection, Dewayne.

Thank you Dwayne.

Thanks, this is what I come for when I visit your channel.

Dewayne I am sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on dealing with loss.