Dear YouTube, F*CK YOU 

This was incredibly well put together and expressed Ryan 👏 well done

It's been amazing seeing you grow through this entire journey Ryan. Hella proud of you. This video is such a gift :)

Bro this video really sums up the entirety of this year for me, its just been an endless battle of ctr and yt impressions bs and downwards analytical charts

Recommended blessed me with this. Holy shit my guy, you're one of the most entertaining creators on the platform! I wonder if you'll be able to pull above 1 mill

I heard about your channel from a comment and peruse over, expecting another filmmaker and i was right, but your unique personal take is something i havent seen in awhile in the space, idk if its the asian angst or the godly pacing + music choice, keep doing you man

I just came across your channel and I must say this could be the BEST video on RU-vid! This needs to be in a film festival, it literally was that good! The TIME you put into this is VERY evident! 😮 You may be right about RU-vid not being your bread and butter, it could be the big screens! I wish you NOTHING but the best and although I have never met you, I support you fulfilling your purpose! 💪🏾 💪🏾 Keep up the great work! 🙏🏽 😊

Great job! Such an introspective look into what it is to be a creator

Don’t give up on making videos wether it be on RU-vid or movies. I think you have a talent

playing on the mac is crazy ngl

This was beautiful, I’m so glad that I was here at this moment in time to experience it. I really relate to a lot of the stuff you stalked about here. Thank you. You make some really amazing stuff, I’m wishing you upmost success for the future!!

WOW i rarely comment on Videos, but this one of the best Videos i have ever saw on youtube. Thanks for sharing your story with us.❤

This was honestly the most colorful, cathartic, heart-on-sleeve reminder that relationships matter more than pleasing the algorithm.

Please don’t stop man pleaseeeee you are fucking AMAZING🎉

The king is back

This video inspired me a lot. Thanks man

Thanks. This was... helpful... and timely.

Good video, storytelling, cinematography. 🤝

what an absolute masterpiece this is ryan. so proud and honored to be your friend

You just encapsulated the routine of emotions that go along side being a story driven creator. I LOVE YOU DUDE!!!! YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I'M NOT CRAZY!!

I loved this video. A very good love hate story towards what it's like to be a creator in 2022. Thank you for making it

Beautiful vid Ryan! Creator camp gives such an awesome vibe!

Dude Awesome video! I think it's an important lesson for all us creators to separate business from art. For a business to survive and flourish, you have to "play the game", which can be the opposite of art. But being "successful" gives you more opportunity to do more artful projects. I think there's this narrative that you should NEVER sell out, but is being a starving artist really than grand? To me, selling out and swallowing my ego were two sides of the same coin. I can't expect people to want to watch something that bashes so hard against the norm of the platform im posting on. and I can't expect to find monetary success in that. But as a community grows, you can sprinkle in more of your personality and artistic vision and eventually just post full on videos that are completely not "algorithm friendly". You can see it in almost everyone's video from Mr.Beast to Casey Neistat. Even Natalie has a bunch of videos that went viral, but they are viral ideas and extremely well executed, and she was able to be her authentic self.

this is possibly the best edited video i’ve ever seen here. as a full time editor myself, this is a huge inspiration. i hope that everything you’ve been working for comes full circle. i love the content man

This is amazing bro, you just incapsulated how if feels to be a youtuber in one video. Im getting emotional 😭

There it is again that funny feeling 🎶

Never quit

Incredible video. A lot of people don't know what it takes to be a creator unless they try it themselves, but it's more stressful than most would expect.

Far more creative then anything Mr Beast has ever put out. I believe the reason you felt so depressed after your first trip was because you'd hit such a high. It's like a drug and those next few months were the come down. Just keep doing what you love to the best you can. You've already discovered something far more precious then subs and views, you've found new friendships. Can't put a price on that.

This is so well made, damn. Bravo.

This hit different. YT needs more storytelling like this. I’m sure people are getting bored of the gimmicks/clickbait trash and it’s only a matter of time people like Ryan will be the new stars the platform needs

You are the "Creators Creator" - thanks for making this. Your struggle is extremely relatable. I think every creator has these thoughts on their journey and every time an upload is a 10/10. I'm glad you've decided to keep creating films.

Incredible like always. Success comes from experience. And experience comes from failure. Thank you for this message.

watching this masterpiece for the second time.

Ive been doing youtube since 2009, and i didnt get success until 2020, ive been thru the ups, the downs, the spotlight, the deep hole of the dark side of youtube content creation, losing my og channel and being stuck to rebuild on this new one, basically every phase that a youtuber goes thru throughout my journey and i must say. this video was the very embodiment of what ive been going thru lately. its like ryan and me where in the same apartment just two sides of the room. thanks for making this dude, i needed this.

You are brilliant and you're only warming up. :)

Shit man, you did it again. Articulating the thoughts that many of us have had. I can so relate to being forced to choose between success on this platform and authenticity. Such a bad choice to have to make, but I've slowly realized that expressing myself the way I want is much more important. Thank you so much.

You’re allowed to be both a masterpiece and work in progress at the same time 🙏

You are by far one of the best storytellers on youtube. Pure art.

What an awesome video. I can relate, probably along with most other creators. And the Patrick Bateman scene was hilarious and amazing The fast and the furious 10 movie will earn way more money and get way more views than a movie like whiplash, but we all know which one is the better film. I think the same can be said about a lot of RU-vid content Something I’ve done on and off over the past year is have someone else post my videos on my RU-vid studio account for me, and I never log in to look at the analytics - because I think that the positive dopamine rush that I get from a 1/10 video is just as unhealthy as the severe depression I get from a 10/10. I want to get that positive dopamine rush from having created something new and cool, regardless of how it’s received by The Algorithm. I want to get the positive reinforcement from putting in the time to practice and get better, rather than by how much attention it receives Having said that, RU-vid analytics does give some super helpful information that helps me learn to tell better stories. And none of us want to bore our audience. But unfortunately that positive aspect is far outweighed by the negatives. At least for me And maybe I’m wrong about all this and am just taking the easy way out. After all, that nauseatingly negative feeling that I get from a 10/10 can sometimes be the best motivator I know to work harder on the next video, because I’m so terrified of feeling that way again 😅

This documentary (yes, not just a yt video) should at least have a million views. It's so well done, edited, written and shows the true reality of being a content creator.

As RU-vid is a sadist, this was in my recommended, and it was incredible. Subscriber gained, excited to see the future of your storytelling. I was hooked the entire video.

Holy shit this is so good Ryan 🤯

this was incredible!! Creator Camp lit such a fire under my a$$ so thank you for making it happen

THIS HITS CLOSE TO HOME! recently had convos with my mom and grandma going like “you’ve been out of school and doing youtube for 2 years now, just quit it already”. you’ve encapsulated this feeling totally. Videos like this is the reason why a lot of us keep going. KEEP ON KEEPING ON!!!

Damn what a wild ride you've been on bro. The algorithm game is a constant headache in my life that I try to stay away from. Obsessing over analytics always ruins the fun of the platform for me. It looked like your Hawaii trip was a much needed recharge for your mental health. I always enjoy the effort you put into your filmmaking, which I appreciate more than any fancy title/thumbnail. Stay strong my dude.

Please come back in 2023!

This vlog is like a book I would reread over and over again. Literally, this is my second time watching this video as I’m writing this comment!! Your stories show how a place doesn’t make a place but the people using that space. Your stories show company, the right kind. Your stories shows self expression, now that’s art, not mastering a skill but mastering how to express yourself. I really enjoy how you let the audience create their own “ending” to each story of yours. That’s what I get out of it, at least :oo It’s like a poem that has MANY interpretations. Not just one ending!! Some people will get it, some people won’t, some people will remain curious and intrigued even if they don’t entirely get it!! I know I won’t entirely get it since you live the life you have with your own internal world butttt please know that you sharing those parts of your world, I am beyond grateful. Thank you!! Your stories stick with me and I shall pass them on 🤝🤝

This video is wild in the best way possible

This is such a relatable video. Trying to balance pursuing RU-vid as both a career and a way to platform your art is super tough. I love your content personally. And you could definitely make a career out of your content. You have elite-tier storytelling skills, editing, cinematography, etc... and that production quality alone separates you from almost every other channel. I do think that dropping your MrBeast-ified thumbnails and making your titles more accurate to your videos would help a lot tho, because they are too clickbaity and will attract viewers who aren't interested in such an introspective and authentic channel. Keep creating because I KNOW you can make it.

As a creator with less than 100 subs it's so much easier to just give up but I agree with you, who cares what the algorithm thinks. Authenticity is so important and this was just want I needed to here!

I have 7 years of ups and downs with RU-vid (this year being the hardest) and this video is the only video that matters at the moment! I wish you nothing but success in your RU-vid journey!

Such an amazing and relatable video man! If there is just one person that you inspire/motivate/educate, then let that be the reason to keep creating (plus I think it's just a matter of time before you blow up if you keep creating videos like this)

Yeap. over 800 videos now and i'm almost done with everything. Sometimes i wonder if it's even worth it

You’re amazing Ryan! Thanks for sharing your story 🙌🙏

Can so relate to the struggle! My bedroom/office is getting more claustrophobic the longer I'm on RU-vid, halp.... glad you made some core memories and decided not to keep going! I love your content.

It’s crazy that great story telling like this doesn’t result in “making a living” and throwing heavy stuff off of a bridge does. Well put. I’m glad you’re not quitting 👊🏾

The algorithm has served you well! I am from the other half of the globe and the video reached me!

“Maybe my stories weren’t made for the social media age” I disagree with this statement. I think it’s because of social media and the internet that you could tell your story. Ultimately RU-vid doesn’t owe you anything if you tell a good story no one owes you anything because that’s not what the point of the website was. The point was for random people to upload whatever they want and even though it got commercialized that essence of RU-vid is still here today. You can still express yourself, you can still press the upload button and upload anything you want and it’ll be watched by either one person or thousands.

This is literally a movie. Seeing creators in the comments empathize in what you feel and encouraged by this story proves how you're making an impact to people who watch your vids. You may still have a long way to go but you've gone far already. So keep going Ryan.

this video hit so different. to point i'm crying

Thank you so much man. I’m in a period of my life where I’m trying to branch out and continue to grow and it is so inspiring to see someone else do it too. I’ve felt the grunge and insurmountability of everything but it means so much to see another continue to press on. Love to see your content! Keep growing! ❤

I feel the struggles, but you can always keep going

Ryan I love your mindset coming to RU-vid. it's very rare of creators that want to make the videos without worrying so much about the algorithm. You might not have the same success as the bigger creators but your free to make the type of videos you want to make without worrying about losing views. That to me is an artist and it shows in your videos.

you explained perfectly what its like making youtube videos, i feel this even as a small youtuber

Can relate. I feel like I'm the only one slacking off. But it feels good to know I'm not the only one struggling with doing something meaningful and trying to make a living doing that.

It's really amazing bro. Thanks for sharing all our stories in one video :)

I know how you feel. I think i'm in the same spot. I like to tell stories on my way, but at same time I would like to get a lot of views on my videos. Recently, I tried to publish trend videos, but I didnt like to do this tipe of videos. Keep it up the good work you put on your videos, I like a lot how you build up your storytelling and never ends like a normal story (the hero wins a the end). But it is a real end. :)

Solidarity brother

Ngl, this video is super inspiring to show that if you're going to make content on youtube, it doesn't always have to be about _finding a niche_ or _optimizing thumbnails_ , _being unique as possible_ , any of that. All you gotta do to enjoy it is make the stuff that you're proud of in the end, regardless of if it's the best you can do, if it's pushing your limits, or it's not getting the results you want in order to make a living. I think a lot of people don't fully understand how hard it is to keep that kind of workflow toward such a versatile passion project such as this until they give it a shot for themselves. I myself have changed my mind on what content I wanna make 3 times already, and I'm still under the 1k mark. It's stressful, it's demoralizing, it's so many of these things. Yet, at the same time, it still feels like things will pan out eventually. It's still fun to make content because it's fun to watch it later on and be like "I did that." It makes you feel like the effort was still worth it, even if it's not "getting results." Things like cancel culture, going viral, click through rate, return viewers, the list goes on... who gives a shit? Sure, we might do this for the entertainment of others, or we do it because we have our own stories to share, our own perspectives, experiences, inspirations. But at the end of the day, we do this because we were given a dream. And there's no better feeling than being able to live out the life we dreamed of.

So powerful. The biggest takeaway is this - I Love making content and I do it because I want to do it, but sometime down the line it starts hitting me how few people care because RU-vid decided my content is not worth it. Now all I think about when I think about working on my next video is "What can I do to grab people's attention". When in reality, that is not why I started my channel.

Hey Ryan, thanks for making this video! I'm going through the exact phase you mentioned in the video rn and I was omw to quit RU-vid and move on to something else.. But the last part of your video gave me motivation to stay here and create videos again! Thank you again ❤

Another incredible video Ryan. Your ability to relay your feelings so clearly is astounding. I'm excited to see where this channel goes in the future. Much love man!

Dear Ryan, if this ever reaches you, which will probably not happen, I still have a few things I would like to share. I have been watching your videos since the iphone commercial one, and would love to say that your videos have inspired me to get back into photography and not sit in my bed everyday thinking about life. I feel that once you start to feel like you can't get up everyday, it just stays. I have been trying to break the cycle for a while now and I am starting to do better, I just wanted to say thank you for all of your videos and how you can almost make everything in them not boring, Keep doing what you are doing and never stop. Bye for now, good luck on your journey.

Man, I felt this so hard! Been going through a rough depressive episode as well post-graduation working this job that I don't know if I love or not. It's good to see other Creators out there fighting the good fight!

Another great video, your videos are such an inspiration :) I can relate to this video SO MUCH.

You are my favorite creator on this platform and you have served as a huge inspiration for me. You are just ahead of your time and people aren't ready for this kind of content yet.

Ryan, this! I have not even finished watching yet but it is absolutely amazing. Your story telling, visuals…I feel like I’m on the journey with you. Bravo 👏🏾 (ok let me finish now)

Ryan, I feel like you and I literally have the same brain. . . It's so refreshing seeing your honestly and vulnerability. Me and so many other people, artists and creators of all kinds, can relate to you so much! Keep experimenting and exploring!! Best of luck to you ❤❤

Wow this hit the spot for me. I find myself getting extremely frustrated by thirst traps too, among other black holes of the algorithm. I decided maybe a couple hours ago that I'm only going to watch videos by true artists...and then RU-vid feeds me you! Well done that was a heck of a story.

This is exactly the kind of story I want to see. It kind of inspires me to learn the craft and tell good Stories to the world.

Aaron killing me 😂

I loved this! Yesterday I was actually looking through RU-vid "where is Ryan? Haven't seen his stuff in a while", and here you come with this. Perfect!

Honestly Ryan, I've made that decision before and must say from experience that it doesn't cut it in the long term. The "staying true to my art and not corrupting myself to the usual ways of success", the "the real me being heard", the "yeah maybe I won't be conventionally successful but it's ok" is not enough. First of all, I seriously doubt that you will actually stop caring about the algorithm, instead you'll probably just try your best to bury the concern, but it'll still be there. Second of all, eventually, the fact that you are spending so many hours to produce storytelling videos that receive one tenth of the attention and money will get to you, and the burnout you had in this video will most likely be recurrent because you'll keep hanging out with people who have a fraction of your skill and creativity but make a hundred times more views and money. If not physically, you'll keep seeing their videos blow up and it's a crushing feeling, to see your art's potential be overshadowed by the innerworkings of business. Now, I must tell you something: you are one of the best creators on the internet. However, resisting the way things work will eventually actually crush your dreams, unless you were born rich, in which case you can keep trying because you still have the resources. My basic advice to you is to TEMPORARILY let go of whatever pride you have in your identity as a creator and MAKE THE ATTRACTIVE VIDEOS ALREADY. You will build an audience that likes you. At the very least, make them in a "Ryan Ng" sorta way, make the stuff that blows up but with a touch of your art. Two of three years of this and you will have a big enough audience that likes you and the ones who won't have seen your older videos will be blown away when you slowly bring them back but this time better because you have more experience, both as a creator and as a human being. I mean, I looked around a few channels from the creator camp, others I already watched before, and practically all of them, if not constantly, often try to "play by the rules". They have attention-grabbing titles and thumbnails (including some of them just being attractive people that can just put their faces in there and boom, people wanna watch the video), video ideas that have been used a million times before, or just plainly piggyback riding bigger youtubers' names. Do it for a while, see your channel grow more and more and them tell us how it feels. These youtubers will praise your work and encourage you to keep going in that direction while they produce, maybe once in a while, a cheap copy of another cheap video that will land them in more frontpages than your hyper-creative ideas ever will. It's all screwed up but it's the way things go. I'm truly sorry if any of this is offensive to you, that wasn't my intention. Wish you the best, man.

Dear Ryan, I Love You. Don't stop creating art!

I'm sorry for what you're going through it truly speaks to me. I'm fairly new to youtube and video creation but I know how crappy it is to go back and forth between "I want to stay true to myself and make videos that bring me joy and don't compromise my mental health" and " I'm putting so much effort into this I need to see results." You are a great story teller so I hope you never stop.

I haven't been this moved by a RU-vid video in a long time. Really glad you're continuing. Thank you for reminding us about relationships.

Yes yes yes!! Ryan you hit the nail on the head!! I’m ready to see where your art goes!! True and meaningful art can’t always be commodified, I started to realise the same thing over the last few months… I understand why it’s so frustrating, you are so talented and have such an intricate artistic style, your video style can be appreciated by anybody… yet RU-vid stays concerned about making money as always… but still, I’m so happy you have decided to continue doing videos, I love YOUR art! Not necessarily the art you create to be commissioned by RU-vid. Everyone is on their own journey, and you may be right… maybe there isn’t an army of people ready to hear your stories… but that doesn’t mean there won’t be one one day in the future…I said it once and I’ll say it again, you are going places!! follow your intuition and keep going!! Does that mean you might need to get a part time job for now… maybe but you’re art will be so meaningful and profound for it❤

So blown away by how introspective into the process this was. Seriously exceptional Ryan, keep going as the pioneer you are

This turned out SOO well! So happy to be apart of your journey and insanely grateful for our friendship! Much love man! :)

bro this video is a masterpiece

Argh Ryan this was so amazing and made me so emotional. I’ve been in a rut with my own ‘work’ by just procrastinating and so on but seeing you pull through has inspired me immensely! I love hearing your stories

10/10 vid

This is the most refreshing piece of content i have watched in a long time. This platform needs for of this. Glad to know I and many others are not alone ❤

This is DEEP and REAL. I feel like I keep changing, growing, and actually getting better - but the results keep getting worse 🤷‍♂️... One day, something will click💡=🚀🏆

I resonate so much with this video. Been doing RU-vid for the past 6 year, only at 300 subs. Most people would have quit, I also wanted to but a life where you don't try reaching for that dream until the end just isn't worth it to me. You are a very talented filmmaker, I'd tell you to have an active income by using your skills and making videos on the side. I mean think about it... maybe not today but maybe 10 years down the line these videos are going to do good so it's worth fighting for.

Hey dude, this is so life-affirming. Love how you're building this unique community. Keep your chin up. Can't wait to see what you do next.

Oh, man. I along with I think a dozen creators I know personally are going through this exact same thing. Thank you, Ryan. May we all figure out how we can navigate through this creator world！

RU-vid can be a rough ride. I'm coming up to 100M views now and make more $$ than I've ever seen, but that day in day out grind can wear you down, and you can lose your soul in chasing views, subs etc. Hang in there. I've said that being a RU-vidr is like being in an abusive relationship but the sex is freaking awesome but she knows that you'll never leave. All the best dude. P.S. I've done vids that took me 15mins to edit that have got 1M+ views too. RU-vid makes no sense in how the algo sends some vids to the moon and others into the ground. :^)

This felt like an entire movie. It’s the exact feeling every creator deals with, and I’m so proud that you made it past the depression. It takes real guts to move past all the “algorithms” and the “anylitcs” and just focus on what you’re passionate about. Because in the end, RU-vid was about exactly what you’re doing right now. RU-vid was intended to be a place where people could share they’re talents, not worry about the ad revenue.

I never thought someone could successfully create a video representation of the frustration when trying to think of a title and thumbnail for an important video that you really want people to see. Making the most attention-grabbing titles and thumbnails is hard enough for average videos, let alone videos that have heart and soul poured into them. Success on this site is not guaranteed for anyone, especially within a time frame as short as two years. No matter the amount of effort you put into your videos, or how good looking you are, or how good your image, sound, or editing quality is, jumping into this 'career' and achieving milestones is never certain. Ever. Some people are left in the dark with their high production quality, and some people gain tens of millions of views vlogging from nothing but their iPhone. I think the biggest mistake a creator can make is taking this site too seriously and following the algorithm. It restricts their ability to create what they want to create without worrying about if it'll get views or not. It turns what's supposed to be a fun job into a stressful one, and it can really drain a creator of all motivation if they let it. Making strict upload schedules, censoring all profanity, putting on a fake smile, making videos they feel like they need to create all for the sake of views, instead of expressing who they are and creating what they WANT to create. Chasing numbers instead of just... having fun making videos. Who cares if you don't consistently get millions of views? Who cares if your videos don't get recommended? Who cares if you don't make tons of money? Who cares if your thumbnail/title isn't the absolute perfect representation of the video you're uploading? Forget about the numbers and do what makes you happy. The numbers that matter will come in the form of the few people that stick around to watch all of your videos, and I think those numbers are more meaningful than the seven figure view counts. This was an outstanding video, and I'm glad that, for once, the algorithm put your video in someone's recommended. :)