Dementia and Delusions: Why do delusions happen and how should you respond? 

Im so glad to have careblazer to get some help. Being a caregiver is overwhelming but it helps to know I'm not alone

My Mom lives with us, she has delusions every day, it’s EXHAUSTING!! I explain it’s her memory illness that causes this, she’ll ask questions and I’ll explain, she seems to accept the explanations and shortly after she forgets the conversation and her delusions return and We repeat the exact process again. Interesting enough, she does remember she has a memory problem. She gets obsessed with something and focuses on it.

Thank you so very much for making these videos and making them freely available to the public.

My mom with dementia is very task-oriented and likes to be 'in-control' even though she hasn't been managing her affairs for a couple of years. Our challenge is that now, she has this recurring delusion that she has another home "exactly like her current home" that she wants to rent out! She brow-beats us often to find out what we should do with the "other place"! We're like, THERE IS NO OTHER PLACE! Her personality unfortunately requires a response. We try to redirect, and I've certainly made the mistake of correcting her, but JEEEZ, it's so exhausting. I've always feared that going along with the delusion was dishonoring or disrespectful to her, but I may just go ahead and tell her that we are putting the 'other place' on the market! GO WITH IT!

My Mum has recently been diagnosed with mixed dementia primarily vascular but with some signs of early alzheimer's as well. With the vascular dementia her decline has been quite rapid & she's currently in hospital awaiting a permanent care placement. She's regularly experiencing delusions, and at first it was hard to know if playing along was the right thing, or if trying to gently correct and re-orientate her was better. I had a feeling that a different response may have been called for each time, depending on what the delusion/content of the delusion was. I was relieved when I spoke to Mum's doctors and nurses at the hospital, and found that my initial hunch had been correct. If my Mum is having a delusion where she thinks she's somewhere else, but is happy with her 'new' surroundings & is talking about all these excursions she's been on (when she hasn't left the hospital ward) then I will play along and agree with her about how lovely everything is, and how great the views are, and what a fun time it sounds like she had when she got to go sight seeing & visit all these nice shops. Or if my Mum is having a delusion that her house has been stripped of all its contents, and they've even taken the walls, and I've very quickly realised she's actually mentally time travelling back to three separate historical memories spaced from 20-40 years apart, then I know there's no point in correcting her and that reassurance & giving her a sense of 'don't worry, we'll work together and get to the bottom of this' is far more beneficial. If; however, it's a case of Mum having a delusion that she's in a different State, doesn't know the area, has become lost, & is talking about wandering along vast stretches of highways desperately trying to get home or find somewhere safe , then I will try to re-orientate her back to time and place by reiterating that she's in 'name of hospital', that the hospital is a safe place, and giving her a simple landmark that she may verbally recognise at least to reassure her that she is in a familiar area (for example: "Mum you're in 'name of suburb' hospital, name of suburb is where 'simple landmark reference' is, you are in a safe place, the people at name of suburb hospital will protect you" - repeat as necessary).

Thank you! Looking forward to the one on hallucinations as well. My Mom has both.

I work with dementia residents in assisted living.There are a few who get paranoid and have delusions about other resident's behavior.Sometimes I automatically try to inform them of reality, which causes argument.Thank you for reminding me of a better way to handle it.😊

The tip to go with the delusion and/or agree with the person is probably the most successful one with my person. Their delusions mostly have to do with people taking stuff away or days of the week. The days of the week is the hardest, because sometimes just agreeing with him doesn't work, but I think sometimes he is forgetting what he or I just said. I have also found that sometimes the delusions are a way to tell me they need something like a drink of water or something, and that usually will make it go away. Sometimes I try singing a song or talk about something he really likes too. I too look forward to the hallucination video. I do sometimes tell the person they are seeing to go away, and that settles it, and keep doing it until they are gone. I also try distractions too, and sometimes just go with it. Is it okay to just ask questions about whatever they are seeing?

I am so sorry I didn't find help like this 25 years ago when I would say my mother first started with this awfull sickness ... because there was nothing to help our family and we were dealing with it blindly all the doctor would say at the beginning was that mum was a little confused that's the term that was used we had zero help ...as the years went by she slowly slowly moved from one stage to another. We would try an correct get angry argue with her @ get no where....noone helped it was a living nightmare especially for my dear father who. Sadly died caring for my mother so I pray people are taught about the beginning stages which are so hard to cope with without knowledge .. we are nearing the end of our journey with dementia we have literally been the crazy leading the demented into the unknown ....my mother is now stage 7 and we pray for a peaceful passing ...it's been tough and I hope anyone going through this gets as much support as possible .... good luck and God bless🙏p

If my mom believes she needs to get dressed and get ready for her mom (long deceased) and her father are coming to get us to go on a trip, it is very hard to defuse this by joining in on it. I get what you mean, im still trying to figure out how to deal with these situations. In one way, I am crazy fascinated with how this happens and in another its killing me inside to see it. You feel robbed. Thank you for the Videos.

Thank you. I needed this today. My mom accused me of stealing her money. She became really aggressive and wanted to call the police.

You have been so helpful. My sister has alcohol induced dementia, rapid onset.. The hardest is not delusion, as much as her constant confabulation. She lacks short term memory, but it is so interesting that she consistently retains all the details of her confabulation.

Thank you, I live with and care for my mom. I used to attend a bi-weekly elder care support group but it stopped due to this pandemic. During this shelter in place it has been really challenging with out a support group to recharge my sanity so I am really happy I found your videos and joined the Careblazers community. I also just requested to join your fb group and looking forward to it. This video is exactly what has been happening lately so I really appreciate it and will apply these tips.

Thank you, Yes with my Mother now. Been living with us for past 6 yrs and Boom💥 can’t believe I didn’t see it until now. Thank you . I have God to help but so hard. 🙏🙏🙏🦋

This is so very helpful, thank you. It is more upsetting for the other person. It’s ok for us to keep repeating ourselves. Yes, they are trying to make sense of the world. These videos are very important, keep going. 🥊

My mother-in-law is having delusions - a tooth on her denture was broken at the hospital. When asked, she said "some guy got in a fight with me on the street and broke it!" She has advanced alzheimers. She was moved to a nursing facility and today blamed a male aid for fighting with her brusing her (brusing was already there) & breaking her denture - Because she is agitated, combative & delusional with my husband (caregiver) I became reallv angry with her. Its hard to remaining calm- I am grateful I found your videos.

Thank you! This is exactly what I go through with my mother!

Thank you for the tips. They will definitely be put into practice, not just by myself, but also my siblings. I am looking forward to hearing your tips on how to deal with the illusions.

I think the most helpful tip is to respond to the emotion by reassurance and not to the accusation by correcting it. Every situation is different though.

Thank you some priceless tips here on how to deal with delusions. ‘Ignore the words, respond to the emotion - such brilliant advice to keep in mind always, thank you so much! 🙏

My mom was so convinced a family member had been in her house and stolen jewellery. She wanted me to call the police, she was obsessed with wreaking revenge on the person, she was so filled with hate and loathing for this person and just wouldn't stop going on and on about how much she wanted to hurt this person. Nothing I said or did got her off the subject. 5 weeks later after mirtazapine she has calmed down, but the blood drains out of my soul if anyone mentions jewellery. I've actually found 3 of the items she said were stolen and she yells " get them out of my sight, I don't want to see them" 🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

Thank you! Sometimes for me is harder when she asks rather than when she makes a statement, because when she makes a statement I know where her mind is at, I can play the game let’s say.... but when she asks things like: where is everyone else? I’m like: everyone else who? It frustrates me that when people come over she has a great time (and motivates her a lot) but then it’s more confusing ... she isn’t quite clear about who she lives with....

No one can stay calm and loving in the face of this, especially if your relationship was never good in better times.

One of the things we do is to continually try to resort to rationality when confronting our loved ones delusions to help us believe we are headed in the right direction, which is typically an incorrect response. It’s a learning process that will be long and difficult with ups and downs, I just need to remind myself that, your videos are helping a lot. Thank you.

My mother said "I think I'll have to call my parents to pick me up and bring me home." I said "the weather is terrible, I don't think they can come today." They have been dead for decades, but she was satisfied. So let's have a coffee? :)

I've been sole caregiver for my aunt since a severe stroke 11 years ago. She has had delusions increasing in frequency for at least 6 years. Most of her delusions are about prowlers (in the attic, on the roof, around the outside of the house/driveway). This is only compounded by the fact that she was actually stalked by an abusive ex 20+ years ago, so there's a past factual basis for the delusions. The rest are usually related to theft of money (both cash on hand and from her accounts...I can't number the times I packed her into the car and went to the atm to show current balances), groceries (that she ate!), and an obsession with surgical scissors from her nursing career (which she hides in bizarre places because she thinks they will be stolen, followed by the inability to find the scissors and screaming fits/accusations). In the past, I have been the target of everything but her brother is now living with us after a divorce and has become the target (probably because he has a confrontational personality, a tendancy to shout due to hearing loss, and zero idea how to handle her without escalating despite my increasingly direct language). While it's a relief not to automatically be the thief in her delusions, things were actually more peaceful when I was. The sad thing is, I honestly think she is only now showing signs of progressing past the early stages of dementia. My dread of the future is without bounds. I have clearly drawn a line in the sand that is restated each time she has a fit: she can scream, she can wave her hands at me and stomp her feet, but the moment she hits me her world will change. She knows (still) that I suffered violent physical abuse from a stepfather as a teen and I have made it clear that I am an adult and don't have to take it anymore. She knows that she can't stay in her home without help and that nobody else can or will take my place, so if she drives me away she will have to go into care. I have no idea how long she will hold on to that awareness and while I wouldn't abandon her once she was in a nursing home, the guilt I feel about even creating that hard boundary is nearly overwhelming. Knowing that I need not and *should not* tolerate physical abuse on top of her current abusive behavior is no balm for that guilt. (Even if not completely unexpected or under her control, the behavior is still abusive and being extremely aware of her inability to control herself doesn't make that abuse any easier to take or less damaging to me as her target, given my history.) So, for the sake of what remains of my mental health and self esteem after years of this, yes, she will go to a nursing home when she hits me. When, not if. Meanwhile, each blowup makes me more resigned to the eventuality and is a push to keep up on my quiet research for a place where she will be well cared for and treated with as much dignity as possible, where I can simply be a watchful, caring family member and (maybe?) an ally rather than the designated enemy.

Thank you so much for the tips. I know this is going to make a difference. God Bless.

This message was very helpful ! Thank you.

Ughhh... My Grandma used to amuse herself during the beginning stage by sewing. She got to where she was leaving scissors, pins, needles everywhere and I was afraid for her safety as well as my grandfather's and my own. I did not respond in an appropriate way, but basically threatened to take away her sewing things if she could not keep from leaving them where somebody could get hurt (there was really no kind of caregiver boot camp at that time to teach me how to deal with issues like this). So whenever she would lose something, she thought I had taken it away from her. She would not be able to find her sewing scissors and thought I had taken them. So she started hiding them when she was finished with them. She would forget where she hid them, so she would be even more sure I had taken them. So next time (I had to buy her more than one new pair to replace these "lost" ones), she would hide them even better than before. I was finding hidden scissors for quite a while after she was no longer interested in sewing. That was a terrible chapter in our dementia journey. 😪

Thanks for the information.

Thanks so much for your so helpful videos!

My husband’s delusion is always the same, there are more people in our home, but not in a frightening way. Could be our sons, deceased family members or even pets from long ago. Usually is “where did ??? go?” So at this stage easy to answer without saying he is imagining them.

This is so helpful. Thank you Dr.

Thanks for posting! I had a family member that thought snakes were under the bed.

I just wanted to say thank you. I just started watching your video l have to say they helped me a lot.

Ty for making these videos 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

Thank you very much for this valuable information. Have you addressed hallucinations yet? I have looked and have not yet found your video on this topic.

This has been very helpful. Thank you

My friend who is with me everyday, thinks everyone has been looking at her money, is stealing from her, she thinks her husband has had an affair. She thinks he hides her things, she complains to her cosmetics lady that her products are terrible, but she has pulled all the make up apart. She talks all the time about horrible her husband is, but he is just stressed and exhausted, she is very nasty. She had a personality disorder before (undiagnosed) She talks constantly about how awful he is to everyone, even strangers in the street. I am constantly agreeing with her, but it's hard, as she tells him I agree with her, so exhausting. I lost it a bit last week, and stuck up for her husband, she threw a fit. She is also spending a huge amount, but it's her money, so he just true to warn her she will have less money, but she this be wants it for himself. Wow it only gets worse by the day!!!!

Very very helpful ty.

Very helpful.

My Mom repeats statements about weather. I counted the minutes in between. It is about one to 3 minutes. She stated the temperature this evening 5 times. I said wow that is hot the first 2 times, but then asked if there was any wind, she saw there was and told me about it. When I answer with more questions it seems to move her on to different subjects. Thank you for this video. It is so helpful. I don't feel alone in this.

My wife is "imagining" a feud between her and her 103 year old Mom. She makes up terrible conversations and attitudes about her mom which can't be true since she lives 2000 miles away. When she brings up her mom I just say your mom is trying very hard and is very old... Also I've organized a weekly Friday morning Skype call with her mom which seems to help a bit... I know her mom loves it. Further she has an Aunt that she "talks" to regularly..(died in 1998). Always has newsy and upbeat stories about Aunt Maggie... And she has conversations with hear dead father. She knows he's in heaven and yet maintains contact. Confabulation is a lifestyle around here

I watch all your videos all so helpful and well done

My granddad, remembers episodes from the past and then I tell him who I am he trips and believes we must of time traveled. Then he wants to smoke until he puked so don't argue right just let him smoke till he throws up. I agree with you to a point but sometimes, I just have to say no! And leave the room. Or tell him he just had a dream he did not time travel.

thankyou for tour advice will try some are sort of doing some of them

So much easier said than done. But I appreciate the help. But for my mom happens almost every night. She wakes me up in the middle of the night.

I know i'am not allone as a caregiver, those video's truely help me .

My mom believes she got radiation poisoning from her microwave and believes everything that is happening with her health is because of it. I did what you said and used this to get her to the doctors and testing for dementia. At first I argued but then I met her in her delusion and it has truly been helpful so thank you!

My poor father regularly has this as we've spoke before it's an absolute nightmare and he's getting worse as well we have tried everything I just doesn't work 3 in the morning being woken up to a man screaming and shouting terrified of bears and all sorts climbing through windows it's just horrible it's never ending it's sadly got to a stage last year he had to go back into care because he was just convinced 24/7 but there were all these horrible things after him

I am interested in hallucinations. I hope I can find that on the website archive . This was very helpful. Now I can understand more what the diff is. Thanks again and again.

Caregviver to two parents from 2007 to 2017 trying to get a job at a Parma, ohio nursing home,memory center...I wish these existed back then, so far many mistakes I made, that caused a great deal of stress and burnout.. Even if I dont get the job,,,these provide a great deal of empowerment.

I been thought all of this with my mother

Blessed

This video is very helpful. My mother is convinced her parents are still alive (deceased over 25 years) and was insisting the other day she had to call them. She believes she speaks to them daily and constantly mentions having to bring them over to her house to see her flowers, celebrate a holiday. This is extremely difficulty to deal with.

My dad had lots of serious delusions that eventually could only be addressed by prescription drugs in the psych ward, so when things get so bad there is that option as well.

Well I haven't quite decided if it's hallucinations or he's just sleeping real hard... my husband has started walking in his sleep... he also believes we shouldn't pay bills we should just save money... He gets very upset when I pay the bills so I no longer involve him with our bills... I hate being like that but it just saves a lot of grief... I am hoping the patch Works to alleviate some of this... Truly enjoy your talks thank you have a safe and great day.

My 97 year old mom is in a memory care home. My dead father talks to her through her wall. He used to come stay overnight but now he just sings and talks through her wall. She thinks my brother is her father and her stuffed animal is very much alive. So far none of this is frightening to her. She does get annoyed with my father for not giving her any money. She is constantly wanting to pack since she is moving back to Shanghai, where she grew up. I never correct her. When she gets annoyed with her caregiver or the food, I just redirect. I live 2 states away so I only visit through phone calls.

My dementia family member has AUDIO hallucinations. He thinks that all the neighbors are talking about him. He putters in the garage and thinks he hears the neighbors talking about him. This simply isn't true, but I just say "Uh huh" so he feels heard, suggest that the neighbors respect him a lot and let it go, since he will shift attention to something else soon enough. Another time, he said something heavy crashed into the roof. He asked if I heard it. I said "No. Let's go see". So we went outside and there was nothing there and no wreckage." He still believed it happened, but I did not deny it or start an argument. I let him investigate it and validated it. In his mind, he hears these sounds, so telling him they did not happen won't work. If he asks me if I also heard it, I quietly respond with a no. But I respect him. One time he claimed people were living in our attic. I actually called our air conditioning people and told them the issue. They sent a friendly young man who checked out the entire attic and took photos. This pleased my dementia family member a lot because an outside authority told him that everything was OK. Sometimes all this requires creativity.

I just wrote a comment (book) to today's teaching about our situation. Condensed : my mom is bedridden and as example recently she and my sister didn't sleep for 3 days, my mother DEMANDING she get her out of bed to deliver mail. (Her 31 career) 20 yrs ago. All Jospice nurse says is give her more Ativan and Haldol. We can't go with delusion when she is demanding things we can't do even though it usually does nothing. Help or read today's longer comment.

I want to know more about paranoia with FTD

So true, its so defficould

I am early in this journey with my mother and I have embraced all the advice and tips in this video. I tell her I love her. I agree with her and answer with a super short response or just with an okay. Early on, Trump and the Russians were outside her window every night. Not sure if that was delusion or hallucinations. She has since moved on to equally strange scenarios.

Smelling something that isn't there is crazy ... happens as a epilepsy symptome pretty often to me since childhood.

Exactly what to do 4:35

The person with this illness lives in his/her own world....I've been in this 17 years so far due to a traumatic brain injury....he wants to ride his motorcycle and drive off...he's left side paralyzed and cannot walk ....it is sad and exhausting agreeing and being in his world I also know it's the kind thing to do...

My mother thinks there is water running down the walls and on to the floor and will flood the house. I just tell her not to worry and that its only light reflections. I do go and check the wall first and then explain that there is nothing to worry about. After assuring her several times she stops. Another one that she does is to call out when in bed claiming I have forgotten to take her shoes off. I just tell her her feet must hurt and show her her shoes by her bed

This was a great video! Thank you!

My mother in law Hallucinates..sees children animals..talks continually..not making any sense..very few times now when she knows what’s going on around her...always sewing in her sleep ..picking lent or insects off her clothes..won’t eat..when being fed..constantly wants to walk and getting into things..she has to be watched 24/7..it’s wearing her husband out 88 yrs old..she fell into a dresser had to have her ligaments repaired..now in nursing home for therapy..this is scary..

Very enlightening and helpful. Is it the same as hallucinations.

My mom suffers from paranoias and delusions. I live 1300 miles away from her in a different state. She thinks my husband is stealing from her and going into her home. She has also said that he is trying to kill her by causing her stress of not being able to find things. When I talk to her on the phone, I have joined into the delusion but then she says she is going to call the police and make a report on him. During our conservatorship hearing her attorney included this delusion in her court paperwork and I had to prove that my husband was not driving 1300 miles multiple times a week to break into her home. This was so upsetting that my husband was actually named as her antagonizer and her attorney went along with her delusion. I cannot seem to calm her down ever regarding this. I would love some help with this.

All 3

my mother thinks my son steals from her and she hates him since she believes that he takes all of the stuff she misplaces and it really bothers me and him. any advice?

Thanks!

This is heart breaking. Dad believes my brother beat him up, which never happened. I’ve tried to just go with it... saying my brothers getting help. I don’t know if that helps. What’s so awful, is dad is nasty , nasty and says horrible things about my brother.... his own son. My dad has become an ugly human. 😞

My wife is 49 and not getting proper help from mental health care in Ontario

my grandmothers delusions lately have been with the head doctor of the full time wing at the nursing home that he wants to marry her and put her on a plane she refuses to eat the food he brings to her. she thinks everyone that comes into the room (nurses) is sent by him to do his dirty work. she refused to eat her dinner Friday till I reassured and I started to cut the chicken and sweet potato and fed it to her and she ate most of the food besides a little bit of veg and gave her the drinks but will she go back to not eating and putting up a fight after im gone I cannot be there every day. I work a lot of the time. this is tough

it's kinda funny in a familiar way. It's really like how you deal with a child that's upset.

I look after my elderly neighbour with vascular and Alzheimer's. She used to have delusional episodes, where she thought she had travelled away for the weekend for a wedding or similar. Last year we took dairy out of her diet after keeping a food and symptoms diary to see if it would make a difference. She's a lot less confused and delusional now. Not recommended for everyone, but for her it made a difference. She went from saying 'I don't know if I'm coming or going' all the time to 'Do you know what? I think l'm getting better.' And that was the end of that. She then went on Donepezil tablets. There was an improvement but also a set back like someone was giving her dairy again. Again she started to say 'I don't know if I'm coming or going'. Turns out the tablet form contained low dose lactose. She's now on the liquid form without the milk and does much much better again.

I work in an old peoples home and one resident is scared often but what she's scared of isn't there so we can't do anything. I think of it like imagine the most scary thing you can. It's over there you know it's not real, they don't saying it's there is like saying that that photo on the table isn't really it's there I can see it. What their seeing is real to them

What if your loved one with dementia does not enjoy any activity at all? He is absolutely uncomfortable and upset pretty much all day long… Getting worse and worse as the day goes on. And every day it’s the same thing.

Grief for the caregiver and anxiety for the patient. Are there medications prescribed for helping with anxiety attacks?

We care for my grandma with dementia. In the course of 4 hours I am her grandchild to a paid person to care for her. She often has delusions. It's just hard to redirect or distract when she has little to no hearing.

Same. My loved one has delusions, and visionary plus auditory hallucinations. It’s very very difficult. This journey of caring for our loved one has made me truly terrified of growing old. Is is normal to be terrified of being the one with dementia in the future? I’ve often thought I’d rather end it at the first sign of dementia when I grow older, and then I realise how silly and selfish that it, then I flip back and forth with the thoughts. It’s truly terrifying. I’m currently 30.

How do you move on when your the only people in the house and the delusion goes on and on and on, each and every day? Same subject , no good answer.

My grandma had delusions because of her dementia. I personally have had delusions too but because of psychosis (I’m 15)

Hello. Awesome. Help. What specialty doctor will yield mother's《83》 best Dg? PCP: 25mg Seroquel.😳 Recommended visual hallucinations and physical. Headed 2 Chicago asap.

My father has started telling people his cat was born in 1974, and is 40 years old. He has been saying this for the last few months. She was actually born in 2004 and is 17 or 18, which my father used to know. Is this a delusion, or is it something else? Most of the delusions you describe seem more hurtful - such as accusations of stealing.

My mother has delusions quite often. She accuses me of stealing, misplacing her stuff, even sleeping with lots of men. The worst thing is she would accuse me of hurting our little dog, a Yorkshire Terrier, which I love dearly. So when she accuses me of beating him or scolding him or doing bad things to him, I don’t know how to respond. I know it’s futile trying to tell her that I would never hurt our dog but she is convinced that I do things to hurt him, which I don’t know how to respond because I cannot agree with her. She also has hallucinations, she sees people, ghosts, strange things or objects, she hears people talking or singing and people repeating what she’s saying which gets her so agitated that she would shout back, nonstop! Oh, and she smells things too, especially food, she always as if I were cooking late at night! I sometimes want to run away and never come back. I’m a wreck!

My wife has delusions hallucinations and I tried to tell her that I'm here nobody will hurt you but she doesn't stop she keeps on and on don't know what to do what to say if I agree with her it doesn't work sometime I just walk away then she said I don't care.

Could you comment on the effect of HYPERthyroidism on a person who is already suffering from dementia please? Thank you.

I really enjoyed this presentation; it gave me lots to think about. My husband was a university research biochemist and is suffering from dementia. He has stopped all reading/research/studying in his field and wanders aimlessly with nothing to engage him scientifically, which he always said was his hobby. How can I use what you mentioned--doing something in a different way--to have him continue with the life he loved--science? Keeping him engaged is a struggle, and he firmly refuses to play games/puzzles or what he considers mindless. It's scientific endeavors that interest him. Any help would be appreciated.

Its difficult especially now that mom is legally blind. Her activities are so limited because of the low vision. How to change a delusional person who is constantly negative. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

Once they start defecation on the floor,not knowing who any one is,becoming violent there is no help any more but medication,restraints and lock down.They are dead already do not put yourself or your children through this!!! The violence and abuse is not to be tolerated don't even feel bad. If it was not dementia it would be criminal behavior.A danger to themselves or others is pretty clear.

What if they stop taking their meds? How can you get them to take them?

I've lost count of all the symptoms and incidents my mother has had. I helped her provide end of life care for my father 1.5 years ago. 1 year and 1 day of his passing was when she had her 1st full blown incident. Ever since then she treats me like a liar and a thief. She disagrees with any and all that i say. She still after 8 months 100% believes that i did some really insane things like went ( big potty ) in the hospital elevator and played fetch with my dog in the 2nd floor pharmacy at Kaiser. 3 emergency visits turned admitted for 3-5 days and no diagnose or treatment. All test came back negative for stroke and she's healthy as far as liver , lungs, heart etc. Yet they release her not knowing why she's there and completely untrusting of me. 1 thing i was recommended to do is prepare for long term care. Meanwhile she's still driving managing her prescriptions and finances. I'm the only family member besides my 96 year old grandmother who is still independent at a senior apartment complex. I also care for all her needs like shopping and Dr. appointments. How do i get my mother to take the necessary test to confirm the cause of memory loss and eradical behavior? Before she harms or kills someone or herself..!

This is going to be a long one because I feel do helpless. My mother who is residing in Florida is being evicted because of her delusions saying people are stealing and breaking in her home and the landlord just can't be responsible for her delusions and paranoia. Well I live in Massachusetts and I am here trying to get her packed and moved with me and she doesn't want to go, she thinks she can just find another place and be fine. Well she forgets to take her medication, she keeps saying she is broke even though she has over 30 grand saved, all she eats is ice cream, she's half blind because of bad lasik surgery. She forgot how to use the phone. Now she is accusing me of stealing all her money, so since I only have until March to get her out. How do I get her to actually accept the move and get her in gear to spend some of her money to get a POD and Uhaul. I go to bed and just cry I have no help I feel lost and she is so mean. I'm not stealing anything from her in fact being the only child I may lose my place up there because I need to be there to work!

Hello this is going on

We join in the delusion regularly, it works very well with our Mom, she feels calm and validated. I still don't like lying to my Mom, but you're dealing with a delusion, not reality.

I'm going through this with my father. It's even more frustrating since all areas of speech was affected due to a stroke last year. It's so hard to grasp anything he's saying when he's agitated & irritable. I try to appease him but sometimes it's impossible. Interestingly though, all of the cuss words are clearly understandable. I feel so bad for him knowing how much of a talker he was before the stroke.