Thank you I will be starting a RU-vid channel in December I’ve been hesitant because of a stalker to his been stalking me for years I don’t feel Safe posting! But I will try this out thanks Sloan
Wilmer has a history of dating young, vulnerable girls. Not only vulnerable because of their age, but also because of their issues with addiction and mental health etc
It’s because there are seriously guys out there that think they need to do a Disney “save the girl” mentality. It’s gross that they can’t be a man when they NEED to be, so they will find someone vulnerable to fulfill their own needs.
At that age, I was also crushing on an older man, and I went far as to tell him how I felt. This man was passed 30; of course, I did not care, but he did. This man broke my heart, and now that I am 28, I am so glad he did. I now respect guys who can shut down a young girl no matter how many times she pursues him.
Yes I had a lot of crushes on men who were in their late twenties-early thirties when I was 18/19. I’m 24 now and look back at that stage of my life and I’m glad my mom and dad kept me protected because I was def very naive and innocent. Legal in the eyes of the law but so young and clueless. It’s the perfect age for a grown man to take advantage and groom
@@clorozweepvmundosalazar5153 reminds me of a 28 y/o man that had a young DAUGHTER, and he was talking to me when I was 18. I met him at a rave. He became very verbally aggressive to me when I refused to have sex with him. He also told me how he wanted me to call him ‘daddy’ and told me he liked me cause how petite my body was and my age 🤢 I was flattered back then. But I’m glad I got red flags and got creeped out when I saw how upset he got when I rejected having sex with him. It’s fucked up too cause he had given me his jacket when I was cold at the rave we were at and I left my wallet in there. Later, his friend told me that the dude stole my $ because he was pissed I didn’t sleep with him. The 36 y/o friend gave me me back my wallet w/ my ID and then asked if I wanted to stay and hook up. He has a wife and kids.
When working with the youth or people that you just have more authority over, you recieve training where they specifically tell you "hey, the people under you might develop feelings for you. It's natural. Don't abuse the relationship you have with these teens, young adults, or the people you're helping get out of a bad situation. You have this sort of Halo effect over you." I feel like more people should recieve this training. If it's truly fate and things are truly meant to be, that 16yo will still be there when she's older. Till then, go away. People are so controlling...
@@kaurov4411 nothing wrong with liking older men. But let's be honest here, all (no I won't use the word most or even some) older male young woman relationships dynamics are predatory and situations ripe for abuse to take place. And abuse normally does take place. Much older people have way more experience that makes it way too easy for them to manipulate their partners. And as is the nature of humans, if they can they will. I've dated Older men. Most of the time I felt gross doing it because It quickly dawned on me that oh, this person doesn't like me for me. They just see an empty vessel that they can occupy and mark up. Someone they can turn into whatever they want. They want a femmebot. Not a partner. They want control. A slave. Not love. Not a relationship. It's gross. Also, when too many older men begin preying on younger women it throws things off. It's just bad all around
Her talking about being 29 and realizing how inappropriate and predatory it was for Wilmer to have dated her as a teenager was relatable. Back in my teens and early 20s, I felt flattered when an older guy liked me, and believed it was because of my 'maturity' 🙄🤦♀️ At 25 I had my daughter, and it made me perceive those relationships/encounters in a different light.
I don't even have any kids but I'm realizing the weirdness of it now that I'm 23. 18 year olds are basically babies to me. They're still kids. They still act like kids most of the time. They're clearly not emotionally mature enough to date someone older. I'm actually emotionally immature and its even weird for me so I imagine for an emotionally mature twenty something, its even worse. My cousin turns 18 just 3 days after I turn 24 in February 2023 and I can't imagine her dating someone my age. Yuck. 😬
Same i was 19-21 talking to a guy who was 25 years older. When i stopped talking to him and started talking to my now husband i realized how gross it was. Yes i was "legal" but barely and i feel very much groomed
I was 15 and dated a 23 year old. I couldn’t see how wrong it was at the time no matter how much my mother explained it to me. But now that I’m 23, I couldn’t even imagine being interested in a 15 year old. Like it literally makes me squirm and cringe from disgust. I saw things in such a different light because my brain had developed. This is why grooming is so fucked up, they’re intellectually mature enough to know it’s wrong yet still choose to engage in the behavior
Literally the same exact situation with me lol. I was with him for almost 2 years before my mom got law enforcement involved. I lost my virginity to him. I was 15, he was 23. Once I turned 17 I finally found the courage to cut him out my life and move on, after that I ended up meeting another boy in my senior year of high school and we’ve been together for almost 6 years now. After turning 23 this year I look back and I think about it a lot, like what would I a 23 year old even have in common with a 15 year old? I’m old enough to vote and go out clubbing and drink alcohol legally not to mention have my own place, get married, start a family if I wanted to while they would be focusing on getting there permit and doing homework and chores. I would be doing college while they would probably be in their freshman or sophomore year of high school. I can never see myself being romantically interested in someone that age, not even being friends since that’s how me and him started out. I don’t hate him, but I do hate what he did to me only cause I can never get that innocence I lost to him back. Now I’m stuck with trauma instead, had to go to therapy for it.
Lol you should hear from my mom's mouth what she thinks I was "old enough" for at 16 years old - things that I wasn't ok with. 😬 So, my mom and I no longer speak. 😌
What’s so horrible about a legal aged relationship? She was far beyond her years, not your average 18yr at old! She lies and says 17 you were 29, Bitch you met at 17, he ran to the hills from her until she was 18, she stated this her self that he wanted nothing to do with her and she was relentless about having him but now the physcopath wants clout so she write and out right lie and makes It a song! She not talented, she’s destroyed herself, she doesn’t know if she’s coming or going if she’s up or down she’s a shit show attention seeking ho who will say and do Anything for a fix Of attention bc lord knows she can’t act and her singing is just yelling and she simply lost it she has zero talent and she has herself to blame! Day late and a dollar short demdogg go away no cares about your deceitful stories you make up in ur sick him her it she he head
I pray my daughter doesnt fall into the hands of some old ass creep, but not only that... i hope my daughter doesnt go after 30 yr olds when shes 17,18,19.... Not because that excuses a man in any way(i am 33 now and i honestly cant understand why a man my age would even look at young ladies, practically kids) but i also had to lie about my age when i was 19, i said i was 23 (i came clean almost immediately) but thats what i had to do to get my wife's attention... why??? Because dmbass little girls ignore guys their age, they feel "mature" and chase older men! Why??? Just why??? Older men that seek young girls arent looking to take em serious, yhey are looking to use and take advantage, and i fking hate that because i myself have a daughter!
Imagine pursuing an online relationship as a 22 year old with a 16-17 year old. When I turned 22, I realized just how predatory he was. I don’t hold a grudge against this person, but I can’t wrap my mind around it.
growing up as an ugly girl, it was beyond flattering to receive compliments from an older guy. i thought i was so special for someone that age to even want to be with me. and its so so sad how naive i was, and demi's song hits it right on the nail.
It’s so unfortunate how many girls relate to this. I hope and pray if I ever have a daughter I’m able to find the right words and guidance so she doesn’t make the same mistakes as me.
Howard Stern is so disrespectful, inappropriate, and super creepy! I am glad that Demi spoke up about this. Creepy men need to be called out on their sick behavior!!!
A man I am googling past and noticed predatory behavior of men has always been they hide with normal people. It's just now being talked about once we had rich country and time to think
This lie that women “mature” faster than men is toxic. Young women see themselves as more mature than the men their age because higher expectations are placed on women. Women are not more mature than men in their teens, men are just allowed to show immature behavior. A young woman is not matured enough mentally to date a guy with more sexual experience. It could be traumatic
I was 17 and he was 28. For years i thought this relationship was the healthiest, most loving relationship. I would never talk trash about him and never let anybody talking down about him. It wasn't until I learned what consent and grooming really was that I was angry and sad. He still tried to contact me and I called him out. I told him I stayed cause I didn't love myself. I ain't heard from him since.
So, I met a guy once and he seemed cool. Then I found out he was 19. He was a sweet guy, but you could tell that he was just figuring out life, figuring out himself. Everyone deserves to mature without the influence of an older partner. Its just not ethical. People need to understand that so much maturing has still got to happen until the mid 20s at least
These grown men act like there's absolutely no possible way that they could find a woman closer to them in age 🤣 who'd make them happy. They act like someone's forcing them with a gun to their head to fuck 19 and 20yos. Just say you're a predator and go. There are plenty of beautiful 25+ yo women to choose from. Leave the kids alone.
You honestly think the Hollywood actress didn't know better at 18? At 18 those women know more than any 30 year old. They hang out in shady places till wee hours of the morning.
@@mayc8674 their minds still aren’t fully formed at 19. Yes they are exposed to a lot of adult stuff but they still mentally are children. You are waaaay different at 17, than you are even at 22.
29 with a 17 year old? Oof. I'll be 21 in a month and I would never date a 17 year old. It's not the age gap, because at 21, I'd probably be willing to date a 25 year old if we meshed well enough. It's just the fact that at 17, you're still immature, learning about the world, figuring yourself out in such a fundamental way. I'm a vastly different person at 21 than I was at 17 and while I'll be a different person at 25 than I am now, I think I've got the fundamentals down.
I relate to this so much. When I was 15 I started "dating" a 22 year old man. I broke up with him on my 18th birthday. When I turned 22, the thought of being with someone that young literally made me sick. It wasn't until that moment when I realized what had truly happened to me.
It’s crazy because I have a super similar story. When I was 14 I started “dating” a 22 year old man and a month before my 18th birthday he broke up with me. And it’s the same as you, when I turned 22 it made me sick because I could never think of dating a teen.
@@jessicareiser659 literally NEVER!! I remember shortly after that, when I was 18 or 19, I met this boy who had a crush on me. He was 15, and I didn't even entertain it. The older guy spent our whole relationship saying things like, "I feel like you're wasting your teenage years on me, and if you don't want to be with me, I understand." And it's like he drilled it into me so much that I started believing it, and eventually when I turned 18, I came to the realization I didn't want to be with him. We still lived together at that point, and I had to call 911 on him twice because he kept shutting the electricity to my room off, and after he did move out, he and his friends TRASHED my apartment. Threw dirt and condiments over everything, broke and ripped things, including my senior year yearbook 🙄 to this day, he denies it, but I know it was him. So that just goes to show how immature he was and speaks to why he would want to be with a child. It's disgusting on so many levels.
I was 25 year old man at job. The 23 year old dues would date 17 year old and think they was cool and winning. One girl was 5, 5 and a 6 2 dude 23 got busted making out with her in house. No one saw a prob. God i pray for the owners daughter, she was mean to me but I understand
Ive listened to bits of her album, and my heart just breaks for her. I can’t even bring myself to listen to the whole thing, because of how much of her pain I can feel through her songs. I pray she finds true peace one day😔
I relate to Demi in so many ways. I was groomed / abused at the age 16 till I was 18 by someone who was 29/30. I didn't know it wasn't okay till I realized that it was not ok. I also got pregnant as soon as I turned 18 by someone who was 27. At the age of 16, I ended up OD-ing and taken advantage of then left at a friend's house and he took off... I never told anyone that. And I was hurting myself by doing multiple things. And watching demi lovato go from how she was to her now. It brings me happiness that she is healing her inner child and expressing the trauma she's gone through. She is my favorite artist❤️❤️ Shes strong❤️❤️
I’m on my mid 20s and couldn’t even fathom being attracted to someone 3 years younger let alone someone in their teens. Feel bad no one said anything, how oblivious we were.
Well, it's different for everyone. for example, I'm 31 and my boyfriend is 24. We met at work and share the same interests and hobbies. We also look the same age, ppl who don't know us assume we're the same age. But tbh before I met him, I also only dated ppl my age or slightly older/younger (like 1-3 years approx.) And when I fell in love with my current bf, I couldn't believe it at first. ^^ But love really is unpredictable sometimes.
@@91clarie that's still grooming. Someone in their early 20s is still figuring life out. You're in your 30s, you should know what it's like to be 24. I know a guy who got married at 25 to a woman in her 30s. He thought he was in love, now he's the same age she was at the time they got married and is looking to divorce because he sees how she took advantage of him. Dating anyone in their teens or 20s is grooming.
@@cariixxxx it's not grooming if both parties are ADULTS, you're out of your mind. By the way my parents have a 20 year age gap and are the healthiest couple I know!!
@@cariixxxx it's not grooming 🤦🏻♀️ it's LITERALLY not what the definition says, look it up if you don't believe me. Jesus Christ, age gaps get less important the older both ppl get
I can only imagine the kind of songs Olivia Rodrigo and Billie Eilish will put out once they turn 30 and "get perspective" too. The fact that these young girls are put in situations where grown ass men can prey, groom and date them so freely is angering and very sad, even sadder is that those kinds of things will continue happening.
thats probably why she's had so many identity issues. The trauma from being groomed. I've been in the music industry for about 6 years and i just got out of it. I was almost signed to a label and the founder of said label would constantly make sexual comments towards me. It made me feel so low and worthless. I'm thinking of becomng fully independent. There are so many amazing men in the world so I dont want to offend any men if they read this, but the men in the music industry and entertainment.. the ones with power... are straight up evil. They abuse their power , and gaslight as a means to avoid taking responsibility for the trauma they inflict onto younger girls AND boys. It's sad and you just gotta keep God with u, and if u dont believe in God, just keep away from bad vibes and lsten to your intution.
Good for you for getting out, that’s awful you had to go through that because you’re trying to build your career. And you are so right, always trust your intuition! It’s there for a reason. Good luck with everything!
Demi definitely has a lot of trauma from the industry. In addition to being groomed, she was SA'd by another actor as a younger teen. Plus their parents were addicts (Mom is in recovery, no?), and also all these Hollyweird executives taking advantage of them ... yeah I'm not surprised she struggled so much So happy that you got out of that situation, lovely! ❤️
I feel all of this so deeply. :’) As someone in my mid-20’s now, it’s repulsive to think of why adult men were trying to hit me up while I was still in highschool. Even like 18 - 22 year olds, I think of how much I’ve grown since then, it’s so hard to wrap my mind around someone not looking at a high schooler and seeing a child.
I’m 26, and that was the age my cousin was when he started to groom me when I was 13/14 years old. Thankfully my mom caught on and put a stop to it. Sometimes you don’t realize you’ve been abused or groomed until you come of the same age as the person was then. I think back now and I couldn’t even imagine hanging out with a 13/14 year old everyday when I’m 26.. 🤢
My first relationship was when I was 18 years old... My boyfriend was 25 yrs old. I didn't think it was a big deal, in fact I was proud that I was dating a 25 yr old. When I turned 25 I felt like I'd been punched in the face "how could a 25 yr old date a teenager!?".... its gross and I am embarrassed that I ever dated him. He was also an abusive, controlling, cheating narcissist, so that played a massive role in me leaving him when I was 21. Moral of the story, 18 yr olds don't make good decisions 🤨
Speak for yourself. It was literally a couple years difference you re victimizing yourself. I made better choices when I was 10 than u did at 8 ur just delayed. As a 24 yo female who dated a 26 yo at 16 honestly. All men can be manipulative all ages.
I'm sorry you went through that. Don't feel bad. It's crazy how mature we think we are when we're teenagers. Your pre frontal cortex wasn't even fully developed yet. It's evil that society tells adult men and young girls that these kinds of relationships are okay. I'm Demi's age and I remember seeing lots of social propaganda normalizing this type of thing growing up. Misogyny is so cruel. I'm glad to see more of these conversations happening. It used to be you were just a jealous old hag if you criticized it at all
@edub9930 Yes, you are, moron! 18 is a teen! Yes, you are legal, but still a teen! And you really need to ask yourself why a mid 20's man would want to date an 18 year old. My ex also told me when we were dated that he made out with a 14 year old when he was 24... He was a preditor!
I remember several interviews she did, where she said she met Wilmer at 17, and he rejected her multiple times. After her 18th birthday, he finally agreed to date her. She also thanked him publicly for helping her get through her drug addiction & other mental health issues & also thanked him publicly for not taking credit publicly for her sobriety. He was there when she was hospitalized for an OD, even though they had been broken up for years at that point. So this song took me by surprise, not gonna lie. Guess the truth will all come out eventually
I thought my ex was the best person I ever dated and only years after did I accept they were the enabler and booster of my self medicating and alcohol abuse and traumatized me to a degree I had deeply numbed within myself. Relationships with people who groom or abuse can be so incredibly chaotic and confusing and at your most vulnerable and turbulent times of life. It can take years to become clear enough to accurately perceive what you experienced. I had other more apparently damaging relationships, but this type was at such a subtle level I would never have seen it if it wasn’t for wising up on that type of subtle abuse and manipulation. I still have a hard time admitting this person was so truly disturbed and abusive, because of the subtlety as I said.
Meamwhile her parents + manager were too busy counting the money they made outta her while a 30yo was creeping on her. They failed to protect her and they are as disgusting as he is if not more.
ONE thing I agree with that DL has done. ONE. BUT, I AM SCREAMING THIS AGAIN- WHY DIDN'T HER PARENTS PROTECT HER? Write a song about them not protecting their child. #shame BTW, it does not matter if an underage person seemingly throw themselves at an adult, the adult must put a stop to it - walk away, do not communicate at all, etc
Her father was pretty much death and her mother emotionally exhausted, at that time She had to threaten Demi to go to Rehab while having two other daughters to take care of...
she paid the bills for a long time at that point. Also not a fan of the “what about the parents” argument - it’s giving, let’s divert the blame. Parents, even when they aren’t being financially supported by their child, infamously cannot tell their teenagers what to do.
From watching the documentary, the mom seems like she either can't, or won't, talk Demi out of an idea. She was either exhausted or maybe ignorant to what a big deal grooming really is. Wilmer is still the most to blame ofc, bc he was an adult & could've said no to dating Demi.
I was 16 when i was groomed by a 23 year old. i thought i was so cool and mature that instead of picking someone their age, he picked a junior in HS. i had always liked older guys. but its true, he was toxic and manipulated the heck out of me. now im 21, free from him thankfully i left him. i can see how messed up it truly is. i could never date anyone whos under 20.....im 21 girl. messed up man. the trauma stays forever.
i remember that when i was a lovatic we all (the fans) absolutely despised wilmer because demi was so young and i kept waiting that she would realize how wrong it was and she never did and always talked about how much they loved him. I'm glad they finally realized how wrong it was and are able to heal from that
She’s so brave for opening up about it. And by doing so she’s helped so many other people come out and share their own stories. Sharing her own experience has given others strength to do the same. It’s so amazing.
@@penskepc2374 my bad it was a honest mistake…getting over aggravated over a comment simply just having the state to notice someone’s pronouns..could’ve have corrected me in a different tone…like I said I made a mistake I didn’t get to watch the vid yet..I was just reading the comments
What she's going through with this seems to be common. I remember being 15/16 dating men in their mid-to-late 20s and thought "I must be really mature for my age since older men like me." Then I entered my mid-20s and saw things much, much differently. I have heard similar things from others who were young dating older people. (To anyone wondering where my parents were: My mom was suffering narcissistic and financial a bus e, my stepfather kicked me out; I was homeless. Older men often had their own place and I'd try to make the ones I liked fall in love with me so I could have a place to stay.)
@@MayISpeak Thank you 😇💖 It's taken a long time, but I'm now grateful as the bad experiences have helped make me the person I am today, and will hopefully help me with my own daughter as she grows up. Surely Demi opening up about her own experience will serve as a warning to many, many young people for years to come. It was horrible for her to go through, but if her song can help others avoid a similar path, then some good came from her bad. I can't speak for Demi, but I know if I was her and someone said "Your song and you talking about things really helped me" I would be touched and feel like it was all worth it to help that one person. And she'll definitely be helping way more than one person with this.
@gypsy woman……wow! I’m so sorry that you had such a tough beginning. I pray that life is much better for you now. Without going into it, I had a tough start too. The positive to it all is that it has made me a compassionate, very aware human. But I’d be lying to say that I’ve totally healed from it all.
Why didnt you go to a place that helps runaways who are young . They have lots of them. Instead you said you chose to try and make older men fall in love with you for a place to sleep.
@@allencanales1894 There was (and still is) only one youth shelter in my area. By 16 I was too old for foster care. The shelter could only keep us for 3 months at a time; it wasn't a permanent solution. But mostly I wanted someone to love me and take care of me, but mostly I wanted to be loved. Don't most people want to feel loved? I can't change my past and don't pretend I didn't make my own mistakes. I'm not a complete victim. I was young, dumb, and seeking love in all the wrong ways to compensate for not receiving healthy love from my parents. I know that now. But I can't change my past. All that aside; presuming the resources from your area are available everywhere (particularly when you don't even know where the person is from) isn't a great idea on the internet. We're all spread far apart. For example; I often wonder why there aren't more resources for males seeking to escape DV; plenty of help for women. Yet when I once posted a rant about that, others (I assume Americans, but may be wrong) said there's plenty of help for men leaving DV where they're from. Help for people in all kinds of situations *should* exist globally, everywhere, in every community, every country. But they don't. Certainly not in my general vicinity.
@@marymendicino9132 *HUGS* I'm sorry you've been through some ish, too, and the healing journey can be a real b. AA has the right idea with "One day at a time" it's so true for so many things when it comes to recovery. You're stronger than you may sometimes feel and you have a beautiful soul 💖
If her new guy doesn’t have substance issues but chooses to support her by not drinking around her I think that is incredibly supportive and hope that they have a beautiful relationship. She has been through a lot. She deserves happiness.
I can totally relate to this. I was 17 when my ex was 30. I thought it was normal and i stayed with him for 6 years in an abusive relationship and I wasnt proply matured and very naive. Now I'm 30 and the thought of been with a 17 year old is crazy to me! Makes me realise a lot
Wilmer dating both Demi and Lindsey in their youngest and most vulnerable stages of life (all while they both struggled with E/D and addictions) says a lot about his use of power. I can’t speak for Mandy as I didn’t even know they dated, but I’m sure it was the same for them as well.
It’s very predatory behavior when i grown a$$ man or woman goes after someone so young. They take advantage of the fact they know nothing about life or about how bad of a person they really are and will let a lot of their bad behavior slide. It’s gross 🙄🤦🏼♀️
I’m glad she’s coming out and speaking on it. It takes a lot of strength and bravery to do what she’s doing. This is completely off topic but Sloan, your eyes are stunning!!!
when i was between 13 and 15 i dated a bunch of guys who were 17/18 and i thought it was pretty normal. once i turned 18 i had many friends who were around 15 bcs we had interests in common in high school, but i realized how different we were, and how 2 or 3 years of difference at that age made such a big impact in how emotionally and mentally mature can a kid/teen be
I lost my attraction for Wilmer when I noticed that all of the women he was linked with were incredibly younger than him. It put such a bad taste in my mouth about him as a teenager and young adult. The same thing happened for me with Adam Levine and Leonardo DiCaprio. These girls may be legal, but just barely. And I'm sorry, I know what the state says, but 21 is a kid to me. I don't know how anyone on the other side of 25 would want to date, sex, hell, even have a conversation with a 21 year old.
I was 19 when I met and started dating “him” and he was 34. I turned 26 this past February and finally realized EVERYTHING and broke it off. The relationship was abusive physically, mentally, sexually, and financially. He had just moved to my city a few years before meeting me. (He stopped me at the gym and reeled me in with a bullshit pickup line. Which now, I see that it really was disgusting). To get away and be safe from him I had to move states.
19 is legally an adult and it sucks. They should definitely change the age to 21 when our minds are fully developed. Just like the legal age to drink and smoke is 21 it should be with relationships with big age gaps.
@@Liztoofly the maturation of the brain actually starts at 23 and ends around 30. (It’s different ages for everyone.) even in your 20s your still vulnerable.
I see people questioning her about this with "Well why did she stick up for him so many times while they were together?!" The answer to that is, she was still being groomed. Everyday. She was still young. She was still naive to it all.... He needs to be CANCELED
I think her writing this song and talking about her experience is such a great thing. For her but also so that we as a society can talk about these kind of relationships and so young girls now can learn from women who have grown and have realized no, it’s not flattering, it’s predatory.
Even tho I’m not a fan of hers and her problematic self , I’m glad she’s exposing the people that have done a lot of harm to her and mental health. She should also add Trace Cyrus to the list.He was 20 when she was 16 and started to flirt with her.
I'm really glad people are speaking out, slowly but surely we will have a safer environment, I believe that. I still feel a very real thread of fear for everyone who does it. Seems like there's a ramped up desperation to keep things hidden, now that more people are aware of the corruption. I hope Demi stays safe and her art continues to be a release for her. Thanks for another one! 💗✨
and???? stop trying to justify old men preying on teenagers all because hes latino. no one gives a single fvck about his race when the topic at hand is how wrong and gross grooming is, IT DOESN'T MATTER THE RACE IN WHICH A PERSON IS WHEN THEY ARE INTENDING ON GROOMING A YOUNGER PERSON INTO HAVING A SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP. it's wrong, plain and simple. so you saying that is completely irrelevant to the issues being discussed here. sit this one out.
@@haileypeterson989 I work with children and after reading several of your comments I would mark you on the list of adults not allowed on school property just from this comment section alone. Please seek therapy something has happened to you and you’re not thinking properly.
@@dollinterrupted That's a horrible thing to say to someone. You do not know me. I work with children too...so your opinion based on a couple comments I made regarding ADULTS doesn't mean a thing. That is a very hateful thing to say about someone you do not even know. You should watch what you say to people.
Wilmer was called a pred back when he was on That 70s Show for dating and partying with minors. Glad that she came to the realization of his actions. Sad that she had no adults with morals around her to protect her from Wilmer types in her youth. Wilmer isn't the only creeper in La-La Land.
I ended up pursuing someone who was 32 when I was 17. I ended up going through hard stuff by myself. I wish he would have shot me down, and I wish he didn’t say all the things he said to me. The older I get the weirder I feel about the whole situation.
I hope more men realize legal doesn’t make it okay. At 18 years old my manager at the time (30) started wanting to take me and date me. He convinced me that I was mature for my age, that I was special. Luckily I didn’t feel right about it and ended all communication but reflecting on it now, I see how predatory he was and my gut was correct.
Projection. My 18 year old mother self was pursuing men 24 years old because I didn't have TIME to play games with men my age after being left and that was MY choice . So everything is circumstantial, nothing is black and white . Like ever lmao .
I disagree, an 18 year old is not mature. Even with a child. I’d almost argue being a mother makes you for vulnerable because being a single parent is difficult and there’s a desire to make the family whole. But I think that’s an even more dangerous position because if an older man, 24 years older than you is interested in an 18 year old, I’d say they’re sexual preferences are more for the playground. It’s wrong.
He didn’t need to be exposed-everyone knew about this when they were together as they were in the public eye. Sad that no one stepped in to stop him. I remember I thought it was creepy and wrong at the time too
I wonder if he had any part in her struggles with addiction Since he was there during the years she was in most active addiction Poor Demi I’m glad she is free
My views on age gap are very all over the place. My parents are 10 years apart and they’ve been happily married for almost 30 years now. My sister and her husband also have an 8 year gap and they’ve been happily married for 12 years now. But at the same time I can see how it can be predatory if a man is always just after young females. Or sometimes love is love for others.
I don’t really like Demi (who cares lol) BUT I’m happy she’s come forward and I hope she can heal from this. I think a part of the reason why she’s slightly unlikable is because of the shit she’s been through. This relationship being a huge impact on her development and mental health.
I knew a guy I worked with a long time ago who was 22 and said he purposely would be the “older protective big brother type” and be there every time they had issues w their boyfriends and that way when they turned 18 he’d wait a little bit and then make his move that way he already made a relationship in which they feel like they could trust him. He really didn’t see this as grooming although it’s like the very definition of grooming. He thought he had a get out of jail free card w this tactic. He’d be talking to 15-16 yrs old and when others called him out on it he was so embarrassed he kind of shrunk in to himself he really didn’t see anything wrong w it smh 🤦🏽♀️
The mental difference between someone in their teens vs 30 years old is huge. That said there is nothing wrong with an age gap relationship between adults and has been proven to have a higher level of overall satisfaction than other relationships for several reasons. That said they were together for years and happy not sure why now Demi is saying she was groomed.
OMG, thank you!!! She was eighteen when he dated. It's not grooming if you are not a minor and you consent. May not have been wise, but to label him an abuser in reference to their relationship is twisting the reality to make him seem worse, than just a immature boy that wasn't man enough to seek out a woman with a sense of herself. But age gap relationships past the age of consent are not grooming. Some may turn out abusive, but to label all age gap relationships as wrong is not fair. And are we seriously still cancelling people. We comment on other people, but unless there is an actual crime, cancelling is the other side of the same bullying coin.
This was something that hit me at 19 years old. AT 15 I DATED A NEAR 19 YEAR OLD. Granted, I have always been genuinely mature, but now that I'm 19, I'm disgusted. I cant even fucking imagine being attracted to a 15 year old, like in any reality. Complete mind fuck
Depends, did she call him a pedo? Did he lose work? Is it true? Did she do it with malice intent to defame his character?.... See Amber Heard is a liar so that is exactly what a civil matter of defamation is for. If Demi is speaking truth then she has nothing to worry about
I was never a big fan of her but her call her daddy interview was AMAZING and that made me listen to her new album which is wow even more amazing I absolutely love when she has rock Sykes it’s just another level my opinion has changed!! And the song 29 is fantastic ❤️🫶🏼 she’s incredibly brave!!
At the age of 17 I got involved with a 27 year old guy, it whent on for years and I definitely see where she's coming from, at the time you don't see it as being wrong but actually girls are quite vulnerable at that stage of their life, I put up with a lot of disrespectful behaviour from that person.
When I was 16 I dated a 22 year old.. I wasn’t the first high schooler he got with, but I was the last because my mom reported him. For years I felt so bad for him and thought what we had was so great. Now at 27, I see all the fucked up things he would do and say to mess with my head. Im so proud of Demi for speaking up about this.. it isn’t easy, especially when we seem so in love and excited as young girls, but the trauma is being seeded regardless.
Hey MarissaH, I noticed your comment wasn't hateful or resentful so I feel safe enough to ask you. I dated older guys most of my life since age 13. I think the girl should also own the fact that when we fancy the guy, we also had intentions to seduce them in the beginning so it's not all the guy's fault. Now fast forward to me being 17 and him 23, I really seduced him and was grateful for the relationship. Never once did I feel the man in any relationship was taking advantage of my younger self. (This was more than a decade ago). There was sexual pressure occasionally, of which I would shut them down, but there's that sort of pressure in same age relationships anyways. I believe the legal limits of consent is for the general public's safety. But if on a case by case basis, a lot of the time, the girl is very into the guy and it's a mutually consensual relationship. What are your thoughts? And what are some examples of being seeded? I guess I'm on the other side of the fence where I'm not blaming my ex's for the past. Perhaps all my relationship power dynamic weren't so skewed - which was fortunate for me.
@@RedRose01289 known better about what? They’re still together and are married, he wasn’t weird, they liked each other, that’s it. He’s supposed to divorce her bc they met when she was 19? That’s a little ridiculous, she’s 4 years over the AOC, if she was 16/17 sure that would be weird but not someone /a 19yr old who turned an adult 4 years ago
@@RedRose01289 Every person is different some are mature and some immature. ”you will always hold these men accountable bc they know what they’re doing” That’s your problem, you are grouping all these men into one space and assuming the worst. I actually agree that we should warn young women about dating men in general, they’re abuse men old or young but we should also tell them that they’re great guys in the world. “Wasting someone’s youth” Again being in a relationship with an older guy doesn’t waist anything as long as they’re happy. Yes you shouldn’t bat an eye unless a person is displaying signs of abuse or grooming/one is underage. I agree that marriage doesn’t mean someone is happy, you can be married and be abused but clearly for most people marriage is a sign they’re happy in their relationship which is what I meant. Again I agree, if they’re happy then I am happy x
Hey Sloan, can you please do a video on Howard Stern and how problematic he is? The way he objectifies women gives me the creeps. I remember seeing a video clip on his interview with Anna Nicole Smith where he was calling her overweight and the fact that nobody was even saying anything to him about how wrong it was completely blew my mind!!
He also needs to be called out for the interview he did with Dana Plato. Said horrible disgusting things to her and she ended up committing suicide shortly after. He's a pig
Yes I really wish people would talk more about his problematic show in the early days when he would have playboy bunnies getting naked and doing really disgusting things on his show. He is really fake now and acts like he’s all about women and empowerment and respects everybody but in reality he is a nasty misogynistic pig
I am not a big fan of Demi. However, the amount of trauma and heartbreak she has had to go through in only 30 years is devastating. The adults in her life failed her. I’m glad she’s talking about her experience with Groomer Valderrama.
Enterprise won’t even let you rent a car until you’re at least 21…Even then, anyone renting UNDER 25 is considered a liability and has restrictions put on them. You gotta be 25 or up to not have any restrictions. Even though 18 is the age of consent in the state of California specifically (it’s younger in other states), it still seems super young to me personally. Just because one state has an age of consent at 16, doesn’t mean I’m flocking to them either! Laws take time to catch up. I think an age gap is OK, but when it involves someone under 25….yikes. But that’s just me. I’m not even going to date a 30 year old whose last GF was a whole teenager…
i was 15 and started dating a 20 yr old who turned 21 two months into us dating. he were together for 4 yrs & i now have a 5 yr old from that relationship. I don’t regret my daughter but god do i regret that relationship . i lost my teen yrs & was manipulated so bad. i’m 22 now & could NEVER date someone that young. It breaks my heart dude
People keep saying that Demi is just trying to get attention and why is she just speaking about this now. I don’t agree with everything that Demi does but this is legit victim-blaming. It can takes time for people to process what they’ve through. ESPECIALLY when they were a minor. That’s one of the reasons why things involving minors are so serious. It’s not like we didn’t know this was an issue. We saw it ourselves. We saw him date other minors or very young adults. It’s not the individual’s fault when we clearly saw it happening.
When I was 17 I met a man whom I thought was 23 online, we began dating and after we became intimate I found out via Facebook he was really 30 years old. I went through many emotions with this person because despite the huge age gap I was unfortunately already in love with him, it wasn’t until after I found out he cheated on me with someone my age that I decided to walk away. Believe it or not situations like that at such a young age can really fuck with your head for a few years, I’m still working on my trust issues till this day.
I'm not a fan of demi but I can empathize with her. When I was 15 I got pregnant by a man who was 25. When he found out I was pregnant he tried to convince me to let him take me to get an abortion but I refused bc it's something I don't believe in doing. Then he threatened me and to come to my house and off himself and I cut off all contact with him. He never tried to get in touch. My son is 16 now... and though the circumstances of which he was conceived wasn't ideal... I'm forever grateful for having my son.
I really hate the box people put those with addictions into. Its always about what your drinking, what meds your taking, who you are hanging with. Constant judgement. Who cares what they were drinking. Her healing and addiction are her business Stop putting her in a box of expectation. It will bring relapse .
The people in these comments makes me so sick. The victim blaming is horrendous. I pray this doesn’t happen to a female close to you people and you guys treat her like you treat Demi. 😒 it’s not right. Let that woman speak her truth please thanks.
I am not defending Wilmer’s behavior at all. But he def looks very young and seems very immature. These type of men cannot date women their age bc women tend to be more mature than men. Also… I am so tired of Demi always victimizing herself for everything.
