DETECT ENVIOUS PEOPLE: Robert Greene On Signs Of Envy 

NEVER,.... keep them away.

My whole family is this way! It’s sad cause I’ve noticed it my whole life and we have never been close!

They r by default enemies

@@not-even-german4892 what?! Go back and read what you wrote.

@@coimbralaw lol let's throw some punctuations that way

Just being attractive is enough to cause others to envy you. Humans generally operate that way, and there’s many people who aren’t happy and content with themselves. These are individuals to avoid as they can be quite dangerous.

I have a neighbor who I don’t know well and I have never met anyone in her family. I bought a new car and she said, “My sister would hate you for having that car!”

Are they? 😮 🤔

True!👍

I know a lot of envious jealous people. A lot of them are broke, or barely have enough money to get by, and live paycheck to paycheck, or off the government. Also a lot of people are envious, and jealous because you're not lazy, and you have the discipline to save, invest, and not blow your money on car payments, going out to eat, drinking, smoking, and gambling at bars.

I think we all had at least one of those friends that would be disappointed, irritated, or in some other way negative. So glad they’re out of my life. We all get envy from time to time but we have to mange that feeling so it doesn’t affect other people or the social dynamic (or whatever it’s called).

Envy is a good thing. It causes you to become a better person because it requires you to achieve more than the person you are envying.

@@samjohnson4846 What you are talking about is admiration, not envy. Envy is hateful and makes you want to destroy people. Admiration makes you want to better yourself.

@@AsAugustSleeps yes its true one of the fruits of envy can be admiration, but most of the time the admiration starts as envy.

@@AsAugustSleeps eventually envy blossoms into admiration. Sometimes, but not always.

I know the feeling. These are the WORSE kind of jealous people.

I think your way of living is terrific! Never let them change your emotionally healthy lifestyle. You have found what so many seek. Contentment within yourself.

This is so me, I have no job, no car, no house (I rent haven’t bought) and I’m single. Someone younger than me who has all those things hates on me like I’m living broke just to spite them. Absolutely CRAZY to me 😂

Same. It's insane!

Well said, Antoinette. And BlaqObysidian is the laugh emoji a defense mechanism?

Well said, Denise.

it is dangerous and as cruel as the grave. get rid of them

I've wanted to destroy people's memories in relationships. Most people are situationally ethical anyway and only care about what's personally resonating to them.

It's also about the type of energy people have towards you; that, in itself, can be destructive - they don't even have to do anything.

@@vernondodo6404 When I'm threatened my eyes, like a wild lion, diminishes my foe. Energy is very important.

Bro whenever i have a new job or what i get all the girls, all the attention, clients love me etc... Guess who instantly try to tear me down when in front of girls and spread rumours etc its hilarious Bc they don't even get the girls in the end lmao They just see you as the number one threat, they want you down because they KNOW they can never reach your level

Recovering from this. Ladies and gentleman guard your heart and don't look back

How horrible. You stay strong .

Hey, anyone here has a science proven theory that can explain how come we envy ones who are in the same peer, such as our friends, our career rivals?? ... Despite the horrible fact of human nature, I still don't think the enviousness, which possesses all of us, is that bad, so we have to to understand it. 👌

Same here, took me many years to begin to understand what was going on

Exactly. People need to understand that this is a real thing in society to protect yourself AND OTHERS from, esp when it happens in the workplace. I've seen too many good souls getting demoralized while evil people are get away with crazy shit, throwing rocks and hiding their hands.

Exactly. Enviers and jealous of their own children, even after they have grown up. Those people exist.

My mom was like that. It's part of my pretty privilege. 🤣🤣😭

people who envy their own children (sometimes contempt) are generally narcissists. A normal person would never envy their own children, they'd just be happy for them.

Thank you so much for saying all this!!! I was just thinking the same thing to myself yesterday. I see i was spot on the right track with what i thought based on life's experiences! Yes! Stay away because if they gossip, they will be gossiping about you as soon as you turn your back too 🧐

Mine are both family and friends. No safety within the close circle.

So true l have many siblings who are very envious of me because of my accomplishments but to this day l work hard to earn my living and sacrificed a great deal to get where I am today. One of my rotten narcissistic sibling lied cheated betrayed me and drained me financially, mentally, emotionally etc. and he’s happy he did it as he feels entitled.

I have aunt's who were all against me getting a mustang to drive. I finally worked my butt off and got it. Now all I hear is how much my insurance is and how they always are worried about me driving it. Yet they had cars like that when they were my age....

Yes. My mom makes sure to remind me that there will always be someone smarter stronger or faster.

Family can be the most treacherous.

So true.

This is so true. This woman I thought was my friend confessed that she liked attention. I explained to her that I wouldn’t be able to trust her & or be friends with her going forward. She still acted aggressive and insisted on coming to my home to speak some more. I told her that I wasn’t comfortable and since we were never friends (as she admitted being jealous of me & only wanting attention) nothing will be missed.

Yes, I heard that from one psychologist. And I remember moments when my friend's mother compared him to me and made him feel bad about himself.

It's true that older adult authority figures in the family i.e., parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts, etcetera, treat one child better than the other child because of abilities, features, looks, golden child vs scapegoat, etcetera, aka favoritism.

This is very dangerous. It has made disasters in my family. I was that kind of favourite son…some of my siblings are making me pay for it and in return I am punishing the elders who pretended to treat me differently. Luckily, I soon understood that it was manipulation.

Wow this is an eye opener bc my older bro is such an envious person but it dawn on me our dad had always praised me infront of them even as children. He would say things like I was faster, stronger more mature. I did things well, cook, clean and handle basic life’s stuff better than my siblings even the ones older than me. And truth be told, I did. My bro was street smart and dad trusted him to handle a lot of fam business including money and those things never really bother me until there was talk to open an international oriental food chin and only my bro was invited to those meetings. I felt a hint of envy during tht time bc I can be business savvy and would most likely carried fam business for generation to come. My older bro is jst as good but can get in his own way. On the other hand, my fam takes great honor in my integrity and would leave every penny to me to handle who gets wat and never let anyone of them know to keep me safe. They know deep down, my other siblings can be envious but reading this comment, I see parents can also unintentionally create this type of jealous spirit by complimenting one sibling over the other. We humans are prone to this type of behaviors so we’ve gotta be mindful bc you never know a common ‘you look nice in tht dress’ could be interpreted to another person who is likely to feel jealous of other ppl

A lot of people might do well to not have kids. If you were abused chances are overwheling that you will abuse your children. Marriages are happier & last longer without children. Extensive peer reviewed research has confirmed this repeatedly.

Bless you for the insight to change for the better!❤

Sometimes our greatest weakness can become our greatest strength. And with envy your weakness was not to be happy for others. So now that you have changed, and humbly admitted it, I think that you can be of great benefit to others for there betterment. You would be a person that people would like to be around. 🌞

society thanks you for your evolution

No worries there . I have been there and done that. Some time life is so rough we will be Shitty and toxic because of the stress and pressure. But in the end if learn and grow then it is a good thing.

You used to be? Just curious, what happened to make you change? And how do u know u won’t fall back into toxic energy or communication

I can forgive, but I can't forget how my former envious & jealous friend, betrayed me. I have what he wanted. I worked hard for what I have. He just 'bludges' & prefers to be envious & jealous of what me & other people have. He won't get off his backside & work for getting things ! I have moved on. I ignore him & refuse to talk to him again. 😊 I don't want 'toxic people' in my life !😄

We shouldn’t give up so easily

Yes. Envious people are dangerous and we indeed should stay away.

An envious person just exited my life and I feel a weight lifted 🙏🏿

@@alisonb5921 I was in a similar situation, but what was worse with my so-called friend was that he had more opportunities than I did and he was more educated. I had to compensate my short comings with being disciplined, positive and the willingness to grind. We were friends for years during our childhood, but even then his jealousy would slip through the cracks occasionally. I didn’t notice at the time, but people who knew us could see it….his own mother gave me a indirect warning. It wasn’t until we started working together is when I saw the jealousy and envy go full blown. Stepped all over me to get ahead, but it blew up in his face in the worse way. It started a chain of events that made his life miserable for some years while my life blossomed with occasional bumps in the road. He just recently got his life together, but he’s one of the people I keep in the rear view mirror of my life.

You’re right. They try to copy/ mirror what they envy of you( styles, hobbies, possessions,etc)and criticize you subtly by some stupid jokes to destroy your self- esteem. I recognize these narcissistic/ toxic people and I ignore their BS and just being myself, even being more confident, doing my things. Don’t let their BS get under your skin. ☮️

Nice .. thank you 😊

Go to an astrologer to find out the area of your life that has hidden envy. Most people are unable to identify envy in themselves. You expect it to be "black envy" when it could easily be "white envy" and you think it's you being inspired by someone. Just saying. Everyone at some point in their life experienced some form of envy.

Liar

This! The things you’ve listed are also things I keep in the front of my mind at all times. Envy is a feeling I can’t identify with. You only feel jealous/envious when you feel inadequate imo and I don’t feel that way. Learning how to be graceful and patient with yourself pretty much makes those negative yearnings no existent. Well for me at least.

Absolutely agreed. Perfectly put👏🏽 Wonderful writing!

Had me singing that old school song “Sparkle in your eyes” by cameo.

I totally agree, lived this experience one of my friend who is unhappy by her choice of spouse isn’t happy about anyone. I concluded its best to keep my good news to myself and not share with her alikes.

How do you know they are unhappy

💯

​@@juliettezea9507 Their pessimism would be so apparent.

Yep. Especially those who always have _lesson to tech you_ and feel like they are life counselors. They are good at concealing their envy.

Its the hardest thing to detect imo especially over text, as someone who is pretty good as reading people

When me & my little brother,(3 years younger), were kids, we didn't have very much. Our parents were poor. Dad worked & Mum did sewing for people. When I was 9, I wanted a bicycle, another neighbour taught me to ride a bike. I rode her bike a lot. For my birthday, I was given a 2nd hand bike. I was happy. I knew my parents couldn't afford to buy me a new bike. A few weeks later, my neighbour was riding a new bike, her parents bought her. I was very jealous. Mum told me "always be grateful for what you have, there's people in the world, who are a lot worse off than you". I stopped being jealous of my neighbour & her new bike. I told her "your bike is nice".She said "thanks, do you want to ride it?". I rode it & thanked her. We stayed friends for years, until her family moved away.😊

Luckily, with time, they'll show their true color, and you'll realize that you always knew they were envious.

That's why I don't subscribe with keeping your enemies close. Stay away from me.

Youre making a human emotion a label. Every person whether they realize it or not have felt these feelings to some degree, so spend enough time around certain people and you will see a wider range of emotion from there. People that really have certain toxic traits are easy to spot right of the bat if youve interacted with people long enough.

It's just unreal isn't it? I am extremely good at reading cues, so the looks of disappointment are crushing to me. From siblings and even a parent. I have learnt to play small just to avoid those hurt feelings as I am someone who feels a lot of joy for the joys of others. That's what love means to me, so it's a constant reminder that they don't love me. But actually when someone shows themselves as envious I then can hold bitterness against them.

And congratulations on your promotion!

Many many congratulations to you on your promotion. Hope you receive abundance in every aspect of your life,always.

Congratulations 🎉🎉🎉on your promotion

Congratulations you earned it!

The reaction to a gift that we give them is like what? Please enlighten me

@jala Jala like a funny coffee mug, a small wall hanging, key chain, or anything you buy, make, or give them. It doesn't matter what it is. The key is how they react. Do they appreciate your efforts, or do they act like they could care less.

@@MeeCee5204 aha thank u very much 🙏

​@MeeCee how about envious people reaction when we are in pain? Give me some insight please

​@@L4LA0412i dated a guy for 3.5 yrs who felt uncomfortable with receiving gifts from me. Come to find out he didn't really like me. He was jealous of me the whole while. He was unable to receive the gifts I gave because he knew how he really felt about me

It's a personality disorder of its own.

Welcome to a side effect of pretty privilege 😅

exactlayyyyy!

💯 ❤

Exactly

So true

I love your quote Spot on Well done😀🇮🇪☘️

The crux of being a humble non envious person. But one thing we can be sure of is we are Gods people.

If it is your boss in the workplace, it is very hard to ignore...

excellent advice! walk away. I talk about 5 types to avoid and how to deal with 'em but in the end, you nailed it: walk away or show them the door.

Was just about to say this

True but what if this person is a family memeber? Cant just cut them off, you might need them one day!

ya, good decision. am still trying to locate real friends. the duplicitous plague n shit.

I'm sorry this happened to you.

They are not your friends

❤

Sad guy he is.

You know the craziest part, he was one of the easier ones to deal with . They are often not that honest and much smarter with masking. Sad but true.

At least he told you, most people boil with inner rage and pretend they are friends. I never post anything good because I know some people will be jealous of me, even the "easy" ones to get along with.

There are truly mentally ill people running around. Sick … what a sicko 😡

That sounds like my sister, unfortunately

Code Eater Me too. I am so sick of the envy.

What happened recently that changed?

@@NicoTNN I grew older and wiser.

Sounds arrogant and obnoxious to me. "Genetically blessed" Please elaborate.

@@JustDaniel6764 You wished you naturally looked as good a me.

AMMMMEEENNNNN I’m 1000% with you!!!!

Often parents who have themselves not understood their own envies and pass it on to their children. When I was growing up, my parents would compare to my sibling and use shame, "Your sister is always organized and does without asking, why can't you be like her?" And make these disgusted faces at me, also out in public if we meet new people, on the car ride home "look at Bill, how happy he looks, and look at you, cant even talk straight, why can't you be more like him?" So I walk around in life and automatically feel shame when someone describes their good news or think "why can't I be like this person?" Still working on it in therapy, would definitely want to grow into a person who can be genuinely happy for people and be the sort of parental figure who allows their children that freedom.

@@audy2174 I’m very sorry to hear that. I have family members that were raised like this as well and they believe the same things. I’m glad you’re going to therapy to heal from this because envy holds people back through trying to be other people instead of just being yourself.

I can answer that when you see your friends all married with kids and good jobs and their own cars and you have none of that it makes you angry over time.

@@brettvader1833 you see, this is my point. If you grew up comparing yourself to everyone of course, you'll get mad. I've had some dark moments in my life where I looked towards those people and it gave me hope and inspiration that I too, can have my own version of success. I think envious people don't have that. They want the version of success that belongs to others. Focus on defining success on your terms and you won't ever look at other people's lives and be angry again.

Don't envy. U can do it. Try....

.

He put into words what i always felt regarding this

True and he's right. Show gratitude ❤

Very well said and summed it all up. Thank you.

Doing that and nothing else sounds like running from the problem. Being envious of someone might teach us something about ourselves if we pay attention. Shifting perspective seems like the way to go. Thank you for the lesson reminder, stranger!

Lol that's one way to reveal on social media how self-unaware you are. Learn to distinguish black envy from white envy and you might see that you have, indeed, been envious at some point in life.

There are many of us...envy is not one of my vices.

Liar

I can do that too!!! and I have a lot of haters!!!: I think of them of having some type of chemical imbalance in their brain!!!

I've been studying body language and manipulation for more than a decade, it's fascinating!

if you have something good to share , do you even call them for a party to celebrate it ? And later send then gift for coming or helping them in any way ? if you don't then why should they care about you when you don't ?

Maybe people see the unfair advantages, networking relationships, bribery and extortion and realize they don't have a chance in life. Those of us who take the time to build a skill and develop our talents get cheated by liars, thieves and hoes who sleep their way to the top. It's not jealousy.

I agree with everything you said. I think that they may also grow up to become tragically and toxically narcisisstic. Excellent comment, CambieSweets! Thank you for the insight.

I agree with you

So true. You can be envious and still be happy for that person. Everybody is envious from time to time because because everybody wish they had something someone else has. That’s a part of life.

I dont understand one thing. I had a friend who was extremely envious but never showed it outfront, he would use passive aggressive tactics to get his own needs met. After he pretty much destroyed me emotionally and left me for the gutters, I had enough and started cursing at him for doing this to me…. How the fuk is what i did envy tho? Maybe i was naive that i didnt realise how much he impacted me over the years…. But those emotions were completely justified and they werent out of the blue for no reason. So i think they need to be more specific in these videos because victims of emotional abuse might misinterpret the meaning of the video….

"jealousy" was weaponized against me by my covert narcissistic mother, I could have no feeling of dislike for a female without her putting us in the ring against each other with me always as me as the loser. Totally fucked up my sense of my own judgement.

Yes, I had the same experience.

if you have something good to share , do you even call them for a party to celebrate it ? And later send then gift for coming or helping them in any way ? if you don't then why should they care about you when you don't ?

Are you sure your not living my life .I have the same sister lol.I also cut ties completely .

I also have a sister like that she was always horrible around me .SHE HAS A PROBLEM I HAVE NOT. GOOD LUCK.

Did you ever fake her out? I love needling these people.

Yet perhaps that`s the opposition. Focusing on yourself vs focusing on others. Additionally it`s possible to admire someone and be envious of them at the same time. I even would go so far to say that a person who envies someone, admires them in some extent by default.

Admiration can contain subconscious envy. You wish you were that person and you are not and by using a psychological defence mechanism of sublimation you make envy turn to admiration. Gratefulness comes from the Buddhist psychology/doctrine and is a cure to envy and self pity. It requires you to turn the defence mechanism of social comparison from comparing up to comparing down. A cognitive believe change that you do not really know how happy people are and what problems and difficulties they might have is another great tool to rid yourself of directing energy towards envy. An even easier way is to block social media on all of your devices.

@@elinasaksakulm5725I agree envy is when you compare yourself to others and are disappointed. Gratitude is when you’re happy with what you got, and don’t feel the need to compare.

I think he means it in a way to destroy envy feelings inside of us.

​​@@redrosin99ow nice insight and thank u for your share. 😀 I agree with you for some part. But honestly I don't agree on GRATITUDE concept these days. Many people unaware uses fake gratitude that lead to toxicity and dishonest to their own self. To covering and deny their envy and their inferiority. And many people uses fakes gratitude to feel superior than others. Many people even uses fake gratitude to boost their ego, how strong they are, how humble they are, how patience they are, how good they are etc. Example: when someone bought a new car and his friend came to his house said something like this: "Ooo nice new car dude! I'm not rich like you so i couldn't buy car like you, but I'm grateful and content. And thankful to GOD for everything" This seems so humble and kind but it's covert arrogance/ covert envious to makes the self looks better and feels good about our self and our situations, to feel superior in other hands. It will left uncomfortable feeling to the opposite person. If he don't have enviousness he simply said "nice car dude!!! Its awesome, bring me with your new car! I'm happy you can buy new nice car.🎉" Gratitude for me is pure emotion that NATURALLY arises when we finally able to see & realized what we have and what we can do. It can't be forced, it can't be pretended, it can't be faked.

Why be that way? Because, haters hate. Skunks spray. That's what they do. All we can do is recognize the 'tell-tail' signs and decide, "Do I want more, or less, of this?" Move feet accordingly. You don't get 'them' anymore than they 'get' you. It is what it is - choose well

They will never understand

@@not-even-german4892 I agree and it’s a shame!

Very well said

@@keelyross5127 Thank you :)

So basically you are a show off. A friend was worried about you during lockdown and reached out to you just for you to show her a list of your achievements, maybe she had a bad time or someobe close to her died and watching other people having a good time while se was down trigger her. In the end you are not better than people who has envy, you want people to envy you and be your personal cheerleader without having empathy and thinking what they might have been through.

@@Lili_ia You sound like one of those “friends”. Good luck to you. I don’t owe you any explanations. Move on if you have no comments for the video but the commenter

@@S.A.1 You sound like a narcissist that can't take a comment againts your story, you can take the likes but not an opposed observation. If you don't like to recive different points of views don't post anything on social media. Simple.

​@@Lili_iayou've never had friends before, or you have and you're the awful friend. Snake.

@@Lili_ia You don't know the person you replied to, and to call them a "show off" and to insinuate that they think they are "better" than other people is not a very nice thing for you to do. Your comment also includes a guilt trip / invite to feel ashamed which was based purely upon your assumptions, which is also not a nice thing to do.

I recomend the book « red flag» by H.G Tudor. And cut all narcissists out of your life. You owe them nothing, and they are never going to « change,listen,understand». There is also never going to be closure with the narcissist. Use your empathy on your self and other good people, instead of wasting it on these « humanoid» creatures

@@Ikaros23 I’m aware of Tudor and Vaknin, as narcissists and a bevy of others who aren’t, but are EXPERT on the topic, such as Little Shaman, and a few others whose names I forget now. I have cut narcissists from my life, one by one. I’ve had them as family, bosses, coworkers, “friends”, and neighbors. I’m mostly comfortable with my own company, so I’m not shy about living this quiet and isolated life. I’m a creative so, alone time is mandatory, whether others like or feel comfortable with it or not. To a point, your advice is quite timely though, when you speak of never getting “closure” with a narcissist. Since my narcissistic mother passed last year, I’m nearing the end of probate with a far more active and capable narcissistic sister. As there are 2 mortgage free properties my mother owned, on the same street, each of us get one. Both are compromised, with the one my sister getting, being worse. Although she’d not been participant in family affairs, for many decades, when my mother started becoming abusive towards me, I went no contact. My sister moved into the other house, but no deed was never signed over. Although I know that my sister doesn’t understand anything about narcissism, nor why I left, she decided upon herself that she was estate executor and would “allow” me to live in the house our mother resided in. My guess is that, if my sister has half a wit, which she hasn’t shown much of during court proceedings, she was hoping I’d soon die and it would be seamless, for her to inherit my property, as next of kin. She DID NOT want probate. She also DID NOT recognize the wishes of the court. Even when he assigned a court-appointed administrator, she cut across him and said she was administrator. Cutting to the chase, as she seemed to be spending a lot of time at the house I’m getting, as I have still live in an apartment all this time, I asked the administrator if I could change the lock and it was approved. My sister disagreed with the administrator, broke into the house and had the lock changed again. My guess is that, she was so confident, she even left a bag of groceries there. The court reprimanded her for it and I let the police know about it. The only reason I couldn’t get her arrested,’is because I haven’t yet received the deed, which will occur over the next few weeks. Because I know how society works with narcissism, I also suspect the cops decided, “Hey, it’s your sister. Just a family squabble. Hug it out.” Wait till I get the deed. Let me find she’s been in there again. She won’t have to worry about the house she’s getting either, because I’ll make sure she loses it, while she’s sitting up in jail. I don’t want her on the same street anyway.

@@privateprivate8366 The important part is that you know who you are dealing with. I have the same issue in my family with my narcissistic mother and sister. When there is time for settling the affairs with property, i will let the lawyers do all the work ( it`s worth the money). They will do all they can to make our life a missery ( like theirs), with their silent treatments, stalling, lies, manipulation and so on. There is another youtuber now author " Elizabeth Shaw", that has excellent content online. There is not a case that she has not analysed about the narcissist. What i find high quality with H.G Tudor is that he is a insider as he is himself a narcissistic psychopath, it was his analysis of the nature of the narcissist that finaly snapped me out of the spell, doubt,gaslighting. Because of the total rawness of his analysis and his details of the insanity of they`re way of thinking. Reality is that we never had a " sister", they are con artists/actors who just used the " mask" of beeing a sibling to manipulate us. My sister was never a criminal, but she totaly lacks empathy and looks at me simply as a object/toy/game she can play with. It sounds to me that you see her for what she is, and your strategy with useing the law and your doubt about the police understanding is 100% something i can relate to. Most can`t understand the extent of the madness and lies of the narcissists and their enablers. You are not alone in your struggle!. stay on " team healthy", and never stray from the path of " zero contanct". These monsters never change

@@Ikaros23 by the time my mother died at the start of last year, I was well-versed in narcissistic behavior patterns.. i felt I could parse out the natural lack of understanding that my sister had about my departure and a person who had issues herself. As my mother had said, back in 2018, that I might need to take abuse from my sister, I can only hope that, in her last years she did. By the looks of both homes, with mildew, wildlife and squalor, I guess both decided to live in Hell and both deserve it. The law really hasn’t done much for me. Only one lawyer wanted to take the case, but she wanted full payment upfront, after a free consultation. I didn’t feel comfortable with that. Other lawyers I spoke with considered the case to be already contested, by my sister’s illegal claim to be estate executor, where she would neither renounce nor be co-executor. She has expressed in her letter writing that, when I left, I gave up everything - both houses, the family business including the website I built for it and anything else I’d done [while she’d been mostly absent and non-participatory for over 30 years]. That, as far as she was concerned, she was “allowing” me to live in one of the 2 houses. Obviously, this would later prevent me from insuring, selling, conveying the house as both homes would remain as part of our mother’s estate. But, as a result of having no lawyer, I had to learn quickly to write up the OSC, the VC and the Proposed Form of Judgement. Note that my background is in graphics. But this got us to court. Still, the court is not of much help as, this is not the first time that I’ve seen them operate on simply getting the parties to “agree”. As far as the court is concerned, agreement can even mean getting the plaintiff to agree to be socked in the nose by the Defendant. Then, it’s case closed. But, after a few hearings and case management conferences, the court drew tired of us, although they let my sister think she was on Jerry Springer. This also meant that, because my sister submitted actual receipts of monies she claims to have spent (although I believe it was from commingled funds with our mother), that I now owed her a few grand. I am unsure as to whether it was her breaking into my house and changing the lock or that the Surrogate office configured the amount as less, but the amount my sister thought she’d get was trimmed down by 1/3. Where law enforcement is concerned, they wouldn’t not arrest her, because I don’t yet have the deed to the house. But, the court-appointed admin costs us both and I have spent more than a year, paying for an apartment, while property taxes continue to escalate on the one property and, if I don’t pay it off before years end, it will go into foreclosure, like I actually wanted all this debt, for a “free” property. The only thing I can look forward to is a ton of work and the fact that my sister has worked her way out of me leaving her one red cent, when I die, as I will have explicit terms in my Will, that she is to receive nothing. Icing on that cake is that I already know she has no healthcare or retirement. I’ve said all of this because, don’t rely upon the law. I’ve seen things come out of the courthouse, that would shame a regular person. When I had a small claims case against a mechanic, the mediator said the court prefers that both parties come away unhappy. Because of all of the cases, they may only have 15 minutes to deal with your case also. Other than that, they can simply be derelict in their duties. Good luck in your situation and with the legalities of it. Narcissists are like vermin. If I move into that house, I will need to have security up to the 3rd floor - there is no 3rd floor.

It's a shame that you have to resort to that for your own mental health and self preservation. I wish you well in all you do. Shine your light!

From 2 -6 were taught empathy 🙏🏽🙌🙏🏽🙌🙏🏽🙌

تحيّاتي لوالدتك .. في حبّها للخير للنّاس ميل لنشر الخير و حسن التربية في ابنائها ..سلوك جميل جدًا ليعيش الجميع في سلام و ا حترام بين البشر ... 👍🌹

Very good! 😊

If he is a narcissist, then aim afraid to tell you the bad news. You never had a brother. This narcissist is just a actor who wheres the «mask» of beeing your brother. They never change. And it don’t matter if you are family.

Narcissism, plain and simple. It's nothing you've done to cause his ugly, malignant personality.

Just stay away from him

It's not always praying and piety. Its also virtuous

🙏 and why do we create envious mirrors?

@@samxsara ​ @ManifesteavecSAMXSARA 🙏 In my opinion we are never creating mirror. We see the world and realities based on our own glasses. :) We see and feel the world based on our state of mind. We attract something that have same vibration and in tune with something inside of us (usually it's buried in unconsciousness state). If it's triggers us badly and affecting our emotional state, there is something in there that want us to look at it (to look deep within). It's in our darkness area, the area that we (unaware) refuse to acknowledge for very long times. :) It's hard to see but worthy if WE can find it. IT WILL CHANGES OUR LIFE! :) 'HONESTY' with our own self is the key. *TMI PART YOU CAN SKIP IT IF YOU WANT* 😂👍 Unhealthy Envious people are very insecure inside, feel small, feel loser, insignificant, inferior, deep shame, deep crave of attentions, jealousy, feel imperfect, feel unfairness and injustice, powerless, victim mentality, and many more. The question is, are we have those things too deep inside of us? 🧐 that need to be acknowledged? Need to be accepted as it is, nurtured, cared and loved and make peace with them?🤔 Many unhealthy envious people transferences and projecting outside of them. Their negative feelings, their negative emotions, their low self esteem, their broken sense of self & their negative self view (they try to be tall by cutting others head) so they able to feel sense of superiority, sense of power, feel significant etc just to covering and deny their negative feelings, negative emotions etc inside of them. Usually envious people are blind to see what they have, always busy to see what they don't have and always busy to see what others have. 😂 Busy to see others life. That comparation that makes them more bitter inside. 😂 And in my personal opinion, enviousness not always bad thing if we are aware of it, accept it as it is and focus to our own self. It can helping us to grow too. And sometimes we met "ENVIOUS" people (that often they are very close to us) just to teach us how to protect ourselves, how to respect & honour ourselves, how to draw line and set healthy boundaries. To not tolerates it anymore and to moves our selves from those relationship and situations that damaging our life, mental & emotional. To say good bye to them that couldn't give healthy, respectful and balance relationship as human beings. :) 🙏

It's not universal. It's a trait of narcissism and not everyone is a narcissist.

Lol this is such a toxic comment. Are you even aware that looking at those who don't have what you have can produce another toxic emotion such as pity and guilt, which on its own can ruin lives? If you tell you kid to eat their dinner bc kids in Africa didn't eat tonight, you're a toxic parent.

Exactly

Me too.......your just spiritually more enlightend I believe or no one has ever had what you want or you feel you can't attain yourself. Inspired or encouraging is what I feel and do.

You are not alone. I used to get so excited about whatever success someone is having that I want to jump in and increase it and contribute to it. It took me a long time to even realise that people are envious. I was so naive. As a result, I also used to announce my victories like a child in a sand box not even realising I'm evoking envy in others but thinking that the whole universe is celebrating with me too. I'm cautious and guarded now because of what I have learned but I still feel and celebrate every good thing that even a distant person like a professional athlete achieves as though it were my own ... It IS my own. It is OURS as a collective consciousness. When we truly grasp this, we envy no one. 'One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind' says it well. The flip side is that every sorrow is yours too. But turn to the Joy that is.

I am truly happy when someone gets the nicer things in life, even if I got nothing. If I want what they have, I know the path, work for it. Usually, their path is not my path. I don't entertain jealousies. Life is just too short.

@the hood psychologist: They believed it to be fake probably because it's an emotion unknown to them. They cannot bring themselves to believe that there might be certain people out there who dont think and behave the same way they do. The funniest thing is they are the ones now judging your character. I know of some people who try very hard to invoke envy because they think you will react to their antics and some others who downplay their success thinking others around them might get envious if they expressed their emotions just the way it is..Honestly, I find both these very petty. I have always believed that I am blessed beyond belief irrespective of what's currently going on. It's a process and nobody life is all sad and gloomy or bright as sunshine all the time. Also, another thing...envy is earned. It's not an emotion I would waste on someone not worth it...maybe that is why it's not an emotion I feel easily..Admiration is not envy. I dont remember a single person I have admired, that I have been envious of..See, ppl will be comfortable around you as long as they feel they are better than you and if the tables ever turn, they will detest it and it will come as a shocker to you because that is not how you were to them...

​@@dabeezkneez8716i used to be this way in my early 20s. Now I don't tell a soul but my bff. I even tell my co workers I tske staycations even though I am out of the country

Your story sounds eerily like mine. As a child, my older brother got a lot of glee tormenting me with verbal insults and encouraging his friends to physically assault me. He was demonic. Karma now has him firmly in its clutches. I don't get pleasure from that. However a life of heavy drug use and alcoholism has taken its toll on his mind and body. He's done all the harm to himself. He's still devious and wants what I have. I cut him off when I asked myself if I'd have someone like him as a friend if he was not related to me. The answer was NO! I've had no contact for 12 years now.

Same

You're a good person who is likeable and usually that's all it takes

New money has swelled her ego

Now she feels like she’s doing better than you

That is envy LOL. It's a facade, though. She's not going to tell you the whole truth, only the glamorous parts.

Talk to her maybe she doesn’t notice

She's acting new. Dont worry karma will hit her for doing so

Of course

Boredom, too. I'm with you.

I think we all envy something. It's just that your nature is you upgrade yourself to have the thing that you envy on other people. Envious people will try to destroy the thing that they can't have and they will try to downgrade people who they envied

Admiration is usually born from envy. Very few people can honestly say they’ve never felt jealous or envious at all in their life

@@jc3productions362 how so?

Well said!!!!

poetic. cant digest what i eat. gonna put that in a poem lol

Exactly. I compete with myself. Like getting a lil more better each year. I don't have any time to mimick

"Don't contend against me in a competition that I didn't even know about" GOLD!

nodozhit You describe a long lost college classmate whom, upon reconnection, behave EXACTLY as you describe. After 1 1/2 years, as she tried to get me engaged in a conversation which was to make me agree with her as she tried to claim that *this* particular family's lineage is superior. Then, only social media contact for 13 months and then I was done with her constant one-upping.

yeh it sucks

Oh my sister always hated me because I won the genetic lottery. There's never real friendship with a sibling who holds envy. Never. Never real. The envy always surfaces sooner or later.

I've had people talk to me some kinda way when I mention my volunteer work. It's because they're triggered because they immediately make it about them, as though your good deeds are just to show them up as not good people. 🙄 A very strange, and gross, kind of envy indeed (envying virtue).

Is being on TV 4 times supposed to be the hallmark of success? Maybe stop virtue signaling and preaching to others about how they live their life, and just do you. “Nobody cares” because your motives are sanctimonious.

"Who come I've been on TV _4_ times?" That's not the reason you do it though right?..😅 You do it because you care about your community right? Not because some random people on TV will see you..🙂

She is not your friend. Why are you allowing this leech to keep draining your energy on your mental expense?

Congratulations!

I ignore reading anything in CAPS.

Good point/analogy

❤