I wish you could be my labor and delivery nurse !!!! I'm due next month and I wish so badly that everyone involved in my care was as knowledgeable and as respectful as you are ! Thank you for your videos they are much appreciated 🙏
@@sarahlavonne Sarah's words will be there in your head, so it's like she's with you. I helped coach my wife through our first back in March thanks to Sarah! We did no medication, vaginal delivery of healthy baby girl 9lbs 1.6oz
This video just proved even more that my doctor very disrespectfully checked my cervix. 34 weeks. Didn’t ask. Just told me to undress. Didn’t say what we were doing or why. Is talking about something else, stands there until I put my legs up, sticks a qtip in me, didn’t say why or where it was going so I got tense and scared thinking about paps… I asked what that was for. He said the strep test so I was like oh okay… then sticks his fingers in me, no lube, it hurt and I was tense which made it hurt more… and just says you’re 1cm dilated, baby’s head is really low. And I leave and cry in my car. Very rushed. Felt very wam bam thank you ma’am. And if I had been asked if would have told them my preference was not to have a vaginal exam until 37 weeks at least.
Love the way you discuss anatomy and labor and delivery! I started watching you when pregnant with my first, and now I watch your videos for supplemental information as a doula! 💕💕💕
I haven’t watched you since I was pregnant with my daughter a year ago. And watching this is making me miss being pregnant, the excitement and learning everything. Ugh I can’t wait to do it again! Thank you so much for your videos I learned so so much from you and had a beautiful labor and delivery because of you. You’re amazing keep doing what your doing, you were made for this 💜
Could you please make that video you mentioned about how to be more vocal about what you want once in labor and at the hospital? I know myself and probably a lot of other women have trouble with this out of fear of creating tension or conflict - but would love some tips about how to be more in control of your own labor and having the freedom to labor how you and your body want 😁
When I was in labor last time, my nurses did a pretty good job of letting me know before checking me, but the on-call doctor DID NOT. I was in labor for 35 total hours, unmedicated, from start to finish. There were times where I was literally falling asleep between contractions because I was so tired and several times, I was WOKEN UP by fingers in my vagina. When I objected, the doctor told me to hold still (since I had jumped) and the nurses laughed it off and tried to make me feel better by making silly jokes about the doctor, but I just felt violated in that moment. I know he did not intend to hurt or scare me, but I was so exhausted that I couldn't think of how to bridge the issue and I ended up letting it go. I didn't realize how much that effected me until 6-8 weeks later when my husband and I attempted sex again and I realized that I was terrified! What is the best way to make sure that my labor team really knows that I must be ASKED before vaginal exams (and woke up BEFORE anyone puts anything inside me)?
I’m 37 weeks with my 3rd, and this was super informative! It was also really empowering. I love how you integrate ways to advocate for yourself as a patient and ways for HCPs to be respectful. Thank you!
My OB is a man and I didn't know he is the one who deliver my baby...38 weeks pregnant, he hasn't checked me yet, but I was scared. I don't want man. I thought at the end of my pregnancy I go to hospital and chose who deliver my baby.....
I'm not even pregnant or sure if I ever want to be (partially because I'm scared of what pregnancy and birth does to my body), but this was really helpful in getting to know my body and how it works.
Your videos saved me during my labor! I delivered at 38 weeks 2 days and the day before I was scheduled to take a childbirth class 🤦♀️ I watched so many of your videos beforehand and I’m so thankful for you!!
@@treelicker my plan wasn’t to go without an epidural but my son was born pretty quickly so I didn’t really have time to get one. He was born within 2.5 hours of me getting to the hospital and I was in triage for an hour of that not thinking I was progressing as quickly as I was.
I'm 37 weeks pregnant and this video really helps me to understand what im about to expect thank u for sharing this nobody explains it like u I really enjoyed this video
You look so pretty Sarah! Thanks for the wonderful video I’m 39 weeks tomorrow! ❤️ this is baby #4 for me, and I’ve never found vaginal exams to be painful at all. This video was so interesting to hear about different experiences and what other women may experience. So informative! Thank you!
The thought of having my cervix checked makes me want an epidural. Also my water was broken (at 2cm and before starting pitocin) against my consent. I was not a fan of my doctor
God, thank you so much for these videos. I’m someone who has anxiety of the unknown and I feel so much more relaxed about things since watching your channel!
I went ahead and got checked early at 36+4 bc I’m being induced at 37+5 due to gestational hypertension. And I’m already 2cm and 75% effaced and it’s my first pregnancy. I had no idea you could be this dilated and effaced this early
I'm always like 8-81/2cm by the time I realize I need to go to the hospital. I go to a midwife, so I don't get checked unless I show signs of contractions. Last time asked to be checked at 39 weeks (because of pressure) 0% and not dilated at all. I was 8.5 cm and 100% not even 6 hours later and pushing about 45 min after that.
Had my baby 7 weeks ago - I have to say, my experience with informed consent and people asking before cervical checks/procedures. I literally had multiple due to issues, and they just came in and said, "we are checking your cervix". If I had it to do over, I'd have been more vocal about my rights. Everything they did didn't sound like a choice for me.
I'm so sorry this happened to you! Definitely unacceptable and one of the main missions of Bundle Birth Nurses... change is coming it just takes awhile. You should have been respected.
@@sarahlavonne thank you! Watching your videos has helped me know how to use my voice if we have another baby! I wish I saw some of the videos before then. I love what you are doing, and hope things continue to change for the better!
@@blank_notyou that was mine too. It was awful. We plan on a second kid but the labor and birth process with our first one was really traumatizing because of how the hospital staff were. Stating they were going to check instead of asking was least awful thing I went through there. I don't know about staff at other hospitals but our experience was 100% they didn't want questions or no's to anything they said, because it meant doing their job differently than they wanted, and they wanted to put in the least amount of work and time per patient as they possibly could. It only took them asking if their students could be in the room watching what they did (teaching hospital) twice and me saying no both times before they stopped asking. The students were still coming in. They were just counting on us not calling them out on it. And we didn't, because we were so overwhelmed. Every interaction was so condescending and we had to ask repeatedly for an explanation of every single thing they did because they had no intention of giving that explanation again because it was too monotonous to them. They were trying pitocin and our baby's heart rate dropped a bit. With no explanation half a dozen nurses came storming in and talking only to each other about how urgent it was to roll me over to my left side, for the baby's safety. One of them grabbed my hand on top of the iv line and pulled and just crushed my hand in theirs during the flip her over swarm. I had bruising there for over a week. They got me rolled over, talked so.e more about no, baby's not responding, then they all walked out to tell the Dr. No one could be bothered during that 10-15 minutes to tell us baby wasn't in a dangerous or damaging heartbeat range, it was just lower than it should be and rolling on the side can sometimes bring it back up. We heard nothing from them, 6 of them, about anything other than baby's heartbeat is dropping. It took 20 minutes for the dr on call to get the message and get to us to explain. That 20 minutes wasn't the problem. The problem was half a dozen people running in, manhandled me, repeatedly saying the heart rates not coming up, then leaving. Walked out. No rush. Not 1 of 6 people could be bothered to tell us don't worry, baby's fine, we just need the Dr to decide what they want to recommend. Not one of 1 of 6 people even bothered to make eye contact with either of us. And it kept going downhill.
They sent me home from my appt @ 5cm’s dialated! With my 3rd baby😳! I went home and walked for an hour and a half on the treadmill. Contractions started at 6pm at a minute apart. I gave birth at 10pm that night
Extremely helpful video. I’m due in 3 days and nervous about vaginal birth. Your video was so informative that now I feel more comfortable and less apprehensive about the experience as I know what to expect. Thank you!
When I was in labor - the WORST part of labor was the cervical checks. I literally got the epidural when I did just because I couldn't handle one more cervical check. My doctor breaking my water (I was being induced) was also incredibly painful. Like, apparently it always hurts, but according to my doctor anyway, it shouldn't hurt THAT bad. I was like, screaming. It was horrific. And even minor things like pap smears are more painful for me, getting my IUD in (which I didn't even want, but oh well I'm stuck with it for now) was nearly unbearable. Had a cervical biopsy once, that was insanely painful too. EVERYTHING they do that has anything to do with my cervix is way, way more painful that it should be/normally is/whatever. My doctor said she believes me because I'd scream/cry/flinch/growl (lol)/etc. when she'd do anything to my cervix even though I couldn't see when she was actually doing something. So she believes me that it's really that painful, but she has no idea why. Do you have any idea why that would be?? Also, for anyone about to give birth - IF you can avoid getting a catheter (especially by nurses that don't usually do caths on postpartum women) right after birth - don't do it lol. Like, if for whatever reason that's something they want to do but it's **optional** - I don't recommend it lol. I had to get one because of a severe hemorrhaging issue, but good Lord, that was worse than delivering my daughter lol
I feel you…same thing with me. Each check got worse and worse. I guess my cervix was high and tilted, but even at 8cm it was excruciating pain when they checked me. I ended up having an emergency c-section but for nearly a month after birth I still was in pain from those checks. I came here to see if that was normal- I started thinking maybe I’m allergic to the gloves because nothing makes sense. Hate that you had a horrible experience too.
Can you do a video on how to choose a midwife? I do NOT feel safe in a hospital after so many bad experiences, but I need someone to guide me through my first labor.
I was the same way. My state has stand alone birth centers, I went to a couple before deciding who would be my midwife. If you look up Birth Centers near you. The downside is that you do have to be within a certain distance in order to qualify. You also have an uncomplicated pregnancy
The midwife on call is the one who figured out that my baby was OP because of sutures and was the reason my labor stalled out at 7cm! I got an epidural after 5 hours stuck at the point (it was hour 21 of labor with pitocin!!), and was able to maneuver babe into a favorable position and went from 7 to 10 in about 1.5/2 hours then pushed her out!
Wow this is so helpful! I am a ftm and had my first cervical exam due to a unscheduled visit to L&D and I was totally NOT prepared for the pain. I now understand why it probably hurt so much: i was unprepared, i clenched my butt and literally lifted my booty off the table because of the surprise pain. Needless to say the whole experience sucked. I asked my OB super scared if I needed to be checked in the future and she said yes, so now I am thankful to have this info so that I can do something to hopefully make it less painful. Thank you so much for the info! Will deff sit on my hands, not pull back and ask her to wait for me to be ready after breathing. Hopefully its not too bad 🤞
I am rare one:) I have been checked and been nothing and an hour later been an 8. My 3rd baby from first contraction to him being born was less than an hour. All four labors have been precipitous labors and I'm expecting my fifth and final in the next few weeks
Same my body has did that before with my 3. An pushing with my 3rd child took about 5 minutes!!! Probably cause there was a whole group of medical students in the room they didn’t ask for my consent making me feel uncomfortable so I pushed quick and they left the room. Shows over!
I got checked about 5 times during labor. After my baby was born she got sick and then meningitis from an infection (also had seizures) they found in my placenta. The infection was of course from getting cervix checked.
36 weeks with my first and I have appreciated all the information and resources available. I have to say, this has been one of the best channels and I’m sharing it with the new moms that I know (it’s comical how many I’m in close proximity to lol)
I walked around 3-4cm dilated for 4 weeks before I went into active labor with my second. My labor and delivery that I could feel was 4 hours from start to finish. I had contractions earlier in the day but I thought it was Braxton hicks (I had them from 20 weeks on. Not painful and nothing consistantly timed). When I went into labor I had intense contractions every 3-4 minutes within 30mins my water broke. 1st hour of labor I i dialed 2cm (6cm dialated at this point). I got to the hospital got my iv 2 hours the anesthesiologist came in talked me through the epidural. 2.5 into labor I was getting my epidural. 3 hours had my epidural 9cm dialated. 3.5 hours 10cm dialated. 1 set of pushes (3) baby was in my arms. It was super intense. However my labor and delivery was a great experience 2nd time around! With my 1st it was a traumatic labor inducing and delivery 🥴. I went into magnesium toxicity 2ce when they were treating me for preeclampsia. 😭
Thank you so so much. I am 39.5 weeks and I've been doing tons of research this time around. This video and the How Do I know I am in Labour, were so very helpful to really make me understand this whole process and feel more empowered going into birth (with third). Thank you!
I am so thankful for your videos. Being a nurse myself I take patient rights very seriously. I am getting ready to have my first baby and I want to know EVERYTHING. Thank you for being so informative!!
Thank you for this… I was checked at my dr appointment a couple days ago and never knew it was a painful thing, the pain surprised me so of course I made it worse on accident by clenching everything and nearly pulling away lol. I wish she would have told me beforehand that it would be uncomfortable because I feel like I panicked and then I kept thinking afterward that something was wrong with me!
Also, if your epidural doesn't work *completely* and only partially removes the pain, that's okay, it's easier (in my opinion) to push right if you can still partially feel it. Yeah, it hurts more, but not as much as it would with nothing. :)
@nibblez_the_clown Yep, precisely why it's kind of a good thing for it to not completely remove the pain. I could still feel almost everything (but luckily I don't think it was the full blown pain, but hard to tell) because mine only worked well on one side to begin with, and then on both sides, all the medicine ended up going down my legs b/c of the weird position they put me in, so my legs were super numb (esp the right leg), but my belly and everything were not. So I could definitely still feel while pushing, and as much as it sucked because it hurt, it was probably better that way.
I know I’m late but all of your videos have really pushed me to become a nurse and so currently I’m in school and hoping to graduate with a nursing degree and license. Thank you so much if it wasn’t for you and all of your videos I would’ve never contemplated taking this next step!
I’m 33 weeks & 3cm dilated, I went for really bad upper back pain on July 4th since my ob said to and everything else was closed. The hospital said I was having contractions but they’re far apart and not in any rhythm. Hoping baby cooks up longer. They ended up discharging me after 2 days since nothing changed thankfully.
Thank you saying not to worry about dilation. 39 weeks and no dilation but dr was able feel her head lower. Was a little discouraged but not anymore. Hoping something happens naturally soon!
My doctor started to check at 33 weeks because I was having a lot of Braxton Hicks and was 2 cm. Currently 37.3 weeks with almost 5 cm still a lot of Braxton... But no pain at all...
Omg I missed you. I'm 39 weeks and have taken your coping with labor course and ahhhhhh I'm so ready. Is it a thing to feel your cervix dilate? I can literally feel the pressure down there.... but it's not painful. Baby #2 😁
Hi, I had VBAC 3 months back in sweden.Delivered baby boy of 4.12kg at 41+1 weeks. When I went to hospital with painful contractions, they checked and admitted me as I am 4cm dilated. Same midwife checked 2-3hours later I was 4.5-5cm so I was having some progress. Next shift midwife when checked after 2hours said I was 3cm. I felt disappointed. Later I was in prolonged labor where I was stuck at 3-4cm for more than 12hours even with regular strong contractions 3-4minutes apart. Does this decrease in dilation happen?
Sarah I made it almost the entire way through being serious. But then I saw your baby with the broken neck 😂😂 when your holding it at the end its SO funny.
When I go to the hospital knowing I’m in labor I’m always sent to Triage were they want to check me to see how dilated I am. Now that I know I can decline being checked, which I never knew as it was not ever phrased as a question, must I be checked in order to get into a delivery room? Or can they look at my contractions on the monitor and know I’m in labor?
Yes that happens at hospitals here too. They check women and some hospitals will send women home if they are not at-least a 4. I know someone who went to hospital and kept getting sent home because she wasn’t at a 7!!!
Hi Alice, I had VBAC 3 months ago When i was admitted i was at 4cm after 2hours i was told it is 4.5-5cm by same midwife. In the next shift another midwife said it is 3cm and i was stuck at 3 cm for more than 12hours and had prolonged labor. Can dilation decrease?
Sarah I love this video. I’m a first time mom 9 weeks pregnant and I’m really nervous about the vaginal exam. When you’re 2 cm they aren’t actually going to shove their fingers in my cervix right? That is absolutely terrifying to me.
10 hours before I went into labor my Dr told me my cervix was "closed and tight like a drum" lol which gives me so much peace going into month 9 with my second
Is it unsafe for the baby to refuse cervical exams? If you wanted to avoid that sort of invasive stuff entirely (exams, catherers, stitches...), is there a way to? Would it be easier during a c section?
Hey Sarah ! Is it normal to get pregnancy symptoms when your postpartum? I’ve had a bunch of pregnancy symptoms but negative tests so I’m just wondering if it’s the hormones and normal ?
Question!!! 37.5 & my provider checked me. I’m 3cm dilated. When I got home I checked myself…..I could easily put 2 fingers in but what I found absolutely was NOT a circle. Is that normal? 😥Doctor didn’t say anything & I can’t find anything about this on line. Please, help. ❤️
plz reply my question plz plz. I'm 5 and a half months pregnant and my baby makes it’s maximum moves in my right side. Is it ok or not? And today I feel pain like giving a light pinch after a while.
HY UM 42 WEEKS PREGNANT N I HAVE NOT YET FELT ANY RELIABLE LABOUR PAINS AND UM AFRAID THAT SOMETHNG MIGHT BE WRONG WITH THE BABY...SO WAT DO I HAVE TO DO WITH THIS KIND OF SITUATION PLS HELP MI
Listen dear with my first child i ws having very worst contractions n had lots of pv's but didn't dilated......why it happened?? N when dilared aftr 12 hrs i didnt felt anything in my vagina nor my provider told anything...it just they saw crowning then they took me to d labor room...
Okay so here's my question that you may have already answered (I apologize if you did). I had my baby on May 2nd (she was born prematurely at 31 weeks due to PPROM but is healthy and happy now). She's home now but we are finding that she hates sleeping flat on her back in her crib (literally will wake up the second she is placed down in the crib). I know everything says that babies should sleep flat on their backs with nothing in the crib (and I agree) but what are the benefits of babies sleeping flat on their backs (besides decreased risk for SIDS) and what can be done for babies who find sleeping flat on their backs uncomfortable? Thank you and you should know that despite it being a scary time because of the baby being born prematurely, your videos helped me get through my labor. I appreciate you!
My mom got me a crib that was slanted... Or like on an incline because I am the same way... I still cannot stand sleeping flat lol...but that really helped me to sleep and I LOVED sleeping... I still do... Ofcourse you put their head on the inclined part and their feet on the declined part... But I think it helps with breathing and less gravity put on the front of the lungs... I AM NOT A DOCTOR OR NURSE... I'm just saying what my mom has told me she did for me over the years... Oh and idc what anyone says TRUST YOUR MOTHERLY INTUITION ALWAYS
I had a 4 hour labour with my first child and 20 minutes after my water broke my baby came out. Labour started 37 weeks and 6 days. Will my second perhaps also be around the same time and be as quick as the first?
I’m not sure if I’m dilated at all but I’m currently 37 weeks and the baby is measuring at 39 weeks. Do you think he’ll come naturally or should I be induced? I really don’t want to have a c-section due to him being so big. But I also don’t want to rip from one end to the other. Should I be concerned?
I am 37weeks right now and just done my Veginal Exam but I'm bleeding right now like I have period, is it normal? Dr. said I'll be in labour this coming week..
Do you allow or recommend moms to labor down? I'm 37 weeks and my next appointment is one week from today and I want to ask my CNM if they allow moms to do this at the hospital I'm delivering at. I'm a first time mom and have a million questions about birth lol I just don't want to be pushing for hours.
Hey! I’m a doula also and one of my last births the mom labored down for about an hour before pushing! And only pushed for about 5-10 mins! I definitely think it can be beneficial 😀
I have a cervix that likes to act up no funneling but with past 2 kids the outside part of it is already open a bit and have to be on progesterone to help it stay closed. An get cervical ultrasounds to keep check of how long it is.
Just started this video, but I’m going to watch the “your rights” video as I’m preparing for my first hospital birth (3rd baby, 2 prior planned out of hospital births). I’m wondering if you can refuse the fundal massage…
The first time I had a stretch & sweep I was soo nervous but the lady didn’t look at my vagina at all and it made me feel so much better. The second lady stared right at it and it made me feel so uncomfortable.
I have question mam can we hv viaginal delivery after c section dr told me that is not possible beoz of c section stitches it would get tear during normal delivery during pushing of baby is it true