Do You Need Space? If So, You Are Being Inauthentic - Teal Swan 

I am over and paying attention to my surroundings while physically awake, people don't realize that I'm already paying attention to them and registering their words and noticeable actions. What bothers me are the people pawing and making a show to always have my direct attention, which most times is observing life as it occurs from outside my body. There are some in particular who have no desire to see their neediness and find their solution, even with the tidbits of wisdom and guidance tools I freely share. Living in the moment requires my attention, if one is in it, simply bring your presence that we may "be" and you won't need my attention. Needy people ugh ick ooo

Lol me too. Well said.

And THAT is authentic. As an ambivert who is an empath,I will not apologise for my need to RECHARGE

Exactly my thoughts 😂👍🏻

OMG I feel exactly like this

Supreme Gene exactly!

Supreme Gene right, especially if u can tell someone likes u but everyone keeps coming inbetwen that vibe saying dont speak to them... they are just assholes only in it for themselves. im sure at one point an time in their lives they ahve been friends with someone ebecame close and ended that friendship had people tell them never to speak to that person again, have theeir friends become friends with that person they said DONT EVER SPEAK TO THAT PERSON. so that person becomes jealous, needs to be the center of attention.... its all about them which is stupid. i dont care if the person was a trillionaire and had all the power in the world the right connections to have that person never speak to u again... if god willing, if god intends for u to ever speak to tht person again, not even a meteorite hitting the planet could come between u speaking to that person again... if god intends for u to speak to that person again... then god will allow it and make away.... i think it is bs... when people put up all these obstacles in life.... when they know god could alter their process. smdh.

Supreme Gene I wholeheartedly agree that being around people at times can be draining. I seem myself to be an extroverted "introvert." Likened to Prince, Beyonce and Michael Jackson to name a few. I relish interacting with people in doses and require moments of solace to Recalibrate from all of the activity amongst others (even my son).

I personally need my alone time because I hate loud noises. I love all my pets, but my “alone time” only includes my cat and not the dog simply because my dog is quite noisy.

Supreme Gene For sure !!

Haha, good one. I can imagine what happens...

Scary Stories LMAO ...Amen to that!

Scary Stories This. All day.

Yes, it's good for other people ;)

julieannboo yep I'm not much fun to be around when I've had enough of people-ing

Interesting

I feel the same Every moment alone is a moment with the divine and I feel deprived of that in the company of others. Wtf do I do cause there's people, family, and society everywhere and they don't allow you to be authentic or honour your needs that you feel you can only fulfil in solitude

Truth

Yes!

She's talking more about isolation instead of spending alone time. It was mentioned that alone time is a tool, that can be used daily. What she's saying is, you can also feel connection to divine around other people IF you feel free being yourself around them, like there's no pressure to be a certain way or simply enjoy silent company cause you see yourself as the main character enjoying your life regardless. When we isolate, it is to feel that freedom of just being without any expectations to "pretend" :)

How the hell am I finding you here?😂😁 I always love your Work Mama Tonjes. I love that we're both looking at this today 😂

Learning to love time with oneself does absolutely have value, yes.

If you find a partner or close friend who wants and accepts you authentically that is a luxury most people just dream of, I have borderline traits people who are borderline don't even know who they are with themselves

So nice to find you here ;)

In response to Meghan The statement you made is exactly how I see it.and people are different. Some people are energized by interacting more with people.such as most extroverts. Introverts need to be alone more because people drain them.alone time means recharging your internal battery.

Yes! 💛

Exactly! boundaries are known and built when we neutralize outter noise and tune within. Thank you for your reflective comment

🥰

A million times-- yes!

Then there's one more way to see it. Like there's my mom, she's able to meditate even when there are people around, she can tolerate moderate amounts of sound while meditating. While i can't meditate when that is happening. And i feel like I 'consider' those sounds as a disturbance, therefore they become disturbance for me. I can't have a second person in the room while meditating. Same for working out. I've never tried a gym that's why. Tho i wana be like my mom one day. On the contrary, i can think complex things, process my feelings, empty my mind and all, yk the same things u do at the end of the day to unwind. I can unwind in the middle of a noisy crowd, even when people are talking to me. while my mom wants people to shut up when she's doing some mental work. So i think it is also about perspective. Because u think that YOU in your headspace is something separate from OTHERS in your physical space. as soon as u think 'others', they will become a disturbance. Technically every thing is energy, you, ur thoughts, people and things around u. Like she asked what's the variable between one life and another life? We can say, what's the variable between one form of energy and another? Our perception of it. Now obv considering here that some people wayy too chatty, mostly do small talk, repeat stuff, want your eye contact, seem like they have no job. They can definitely be an annoyance no matter what u doin lol.

Yes, this is also me.

I relate 100%. But I hate this fear I have of being judged

omg you nailed it.

Aw same :( I haven't had my own room my whole life, and I've been suppressing what I actually want to do with my time.

same here.

I totally feel that. I have a layer of reservation when it comes to people- my guard is always up and it’s not only exhausting but distracting.

Explained it perfectly

Unsafe? Think about this overused word. Unsafe means there is danger. You sound like you have a confidence issue.

@@ASMRyouVEGANyet there is plenty of reasons to use unsafe. It is the correct word. If Being yourself is something that your friends, family or people in general will struggle to except or not except at all makes you feel very unsafe eg. Being gay or atheist in a strict religious family can lead to serious consequences like being an outcast, thrown out or even beaten. You especially feel unsafe when people have bullied you or criticized you for being who you are. Please educate yourself.

Same

Cool

Me too! 🙏🏼

If you are tipped very far from center to the empathic side of the scale, you should re-center yourself. We are meant to be in the physical and comfortably so.

Boom 🎯

Beautifully said. Thanks ❤

Yep!

shailjanand jha - YES! I recently found out that I am overwhelmed by people who constantly talk b/c(proceeds to proverbially talk with herself out loud on youtube) I think constantly and rapidly and they are literally interrupting my conversation with myself. lol Sharing b/c it was a big relief to finally put that piece of my puzzle together and has already had a positive effect on my life. I love people, and I love listening to them talk when I am interested and they have important things to say, but I can't be around people who are just thinking out loud, gossiping, or making small talk. It is absolutely exhausting. I hope she will read through the comments and maybe post a follow up video about how she was incorrect about some things in this video, b/c, if I'm being totally authentic, it was a bit insulting. lol Ah, well, ya live, ya learn, and you let your dog out so you can work on that project that you've been thinking about all day. :P

@@jsmyth024 👏👏👏👏

totally

But teal says that alone time is a tool. It seems like you’re saying you need more alone time than most to reflect...which as an extrovert myself...is necessary for all humans. But pushing people away constantly is inauthentic

Sounds like you have a boundary issue

Agree! 👍

True right?

@@ys-kv3ug can you elaborate on that? Genuinely want to know

@@hanaheh I'm proud of you for seeking to know about such a tricky issue like this , it would be better if you do your own research on Google and read enough about it until you catch up with every detail instead of asking people

100% true

@@jimmysroom5132 you can't really face yourself without connection to others

Exactly

@@aslhanhanc8287 That's actually not true. We _all_ have relationships with others. You can't avoid that. You have parents, teachers, friends, etc, growing up...unless you were raised in a wolves' den 😅

@@aslhanhanc8287 this is 100% true. Other people bring out the parts in ourselves that need healing, which is essential if we ever want to know ourselves. Which is why we get triggered by people. All our feelings are telling us about ourselves, even if we think it's about others. Knowing this is liberating because we realize no other person can ever control how we feel.

Exactly!! This comment should be pinned.

No, actually you didn't fully get what Teal said. I did, because I am more enlightened. Thanks

​@@msdukaaa😂 what a stupid fool

And some ppls most creative and fulfilling years were when they were high on drugs. What's your point. Having meaning and purpose in self destructive activities doesn't make it less self destructive lol

@@user_abcxyzz nice strawman bro

@@lulubeloo ty

@@user_abcxyzz no problem, just stretch a little before doing so much mental gymnastics.

@@user_abcxyzz how do you equate addiction with alone time? Lmao. What a reach.

i hear u, but sometimes i want to fart or "adjust"

I really appreciate your input. Thinking on it I realized you're right, I really do need to work towards being more assertive and authentic at work. Not quite sure where to begin with this journey but at least it's a work in progress now. Thank you. :)

Change

Phill Simmer simplicity is relative.. thats your perception from millions❣️

Wow I totally reacted the same way you did I heard it a couple of months ago and didn't really hear it but today I really needed to hear this. It explains exactly what is going on with me. I guess I wasn't ready to hear it then. Now I am but now I'm really scared and bummed. I have A LOT of work to do!!! 😮 😢 😂

😂

Erin Spencer I really agree with your reasons , I get burnt out very eisely in a crowd .

Mike Lucas even then i get drained.

I too feel drained by people and feel that I might qualify as an empath myself. My social life mostly consists of posting stuff on YT.

of course they are not responsible, it is just what happens... I can be in a crowd with no fear whatsoever... I am not afraid to speak in public, to give a speech, at all.... but, I do think it IS because of our thoughts about the crowd... but, it does not have to be fear... maybe it is, for me anyways, a sort of snobbery... it's not that I look down on anyone truly, I often have great respect for many people with whom I have not felt a connection of some sort, but I guess that's it, I only want to feel some kind of connection and it is difficult for me to plug in or feel a certain vibration with just anyone... I suppose if I were surrounded by people I resonate with better, I might feel less drained... thre are probably people who don't feel this need to resonate so much, or are much more willing to go through a slew of conversations with strangers to find people they resonate with when they are in a crowd... perhaps that is the draining part... the sifting through to find the person you feel comfortable with... but, also I think I might put up walls and others sense it and then the crowd becomes draining, but it is my doing, my thoughts.... but, am I really putting up walls because I'm afraid.... maybe, but it does not feel like fear.... I don't know, but thanks for inspiring a direction of self reflection... I am going to look into that idea of the equanimous mind, never heard that one before... I did not look that up before posting my first reaction to your idea here.... Joy & Gratitude, Mike!

Why do you have this interpretation that anyone in this thread feels like anyone is doing anything to anyone?

Introvert is just another perception. Thing is, you're not born like that, it might feel like you are, but it's just a reality you've created that you can change if you want to. You don't have too, if you're happy being an introvert then by all means, but if you're the type of person that push people away to the point where you don't have anyone to be around you anymore and you can't keep a relationship even though you want to, then maybe you don't really want to be like that. We keep identifying with all these labels, I'm an introvert, I'm depressed, I got PTSD, I'm British, I like Xbox, but it's all just nonsense we make up in our head. And we can keep that nonsense, or replace it with other nonsense. It all just depends on what you want. I know it doesn't seem that way when you're in it, it seems like you can't really control it. I know, I was depressed and suicidal for over a decade. But that doesn't change the fact that I was the one creating that depression. Sure, there where many outside factors, but the only reason those outside factors could affect me was because I let them. Anyway, what I'm saying is that you're not an introvert, you're a human, and humans need to identify as something, you picked introvert. You probably picked this label because you related to how others with this label feel and think. But you never really stopped to question why you feel this way, instead you just took it as validation and went "that's me". The same thing can be said for extroverts of course, that's not "right" either. There is no right or wrong way to be, the only thing that matter is if you're getting what you want out of how you are. If the answer is no then you might want to change, if the answer is yes then keep doing what you're doing.

Evandro RedPhoenix I AGREE, like you said we express ourselves through our own words based on that which resonates with us coming from the center of our own universe just like how you are experiencing life from the center of your own universe and the rest is life that you are conceiving, constructing, and projecting. I would consider myself an introvert because that’s just my nature, however at the right place and with the right person I am continuously talking non stop and we are having an intimate moment with whomever it may be... it’s rare though:” 99.99% of the time I am trying to show them something... Anyways We prefer to be alone because we have our own aura and not the mixture of other auras. We are either choosing to express ourself or not, that’s about it. We do these on different degrees. *The real question is... What’s the circumstance? why are you expressing yourself to begin with? Are you hurt? Why or why not? Is it necessary? Will it change anything? These you should know instantly, if not then your not spiritually inclined or you don’t have a heightened intuition. We are on both sides of the scale and based on your environment and the placement of people, places, and experiences these will have an influence on the person and also based on their level of knowledge they will emanate their signature energy or not. *You could express yourself *or this is what i usually do and it doesn’t bother me at all because I understand others and I am always curious to hear others expression or not expression themselves and that’s about it. I could acknowledge myself and what’s going on at the moment around me and i could just be there and realize without any interference. I don’t express myself to certain people like my dad or brother or mother or friends because if I did I would over power them. Not consciously, but they will experience this more deeply because If I express myself they will not retain all the information and they will be lift speech less. This will not happen because their level of perception and feelings aren’t like that of mine because nothing disturbs my peace of mind ever. I smile because I see that these people are expressing themselves and their thoughts and feelings, so I appreciate this and I respect them for this. Because if I step in and if I ever say anything it will be to instruct them:” So I don’t want to seem like I am always advising them because they will realize they have to make a shift and adapt to this shift even though it will take time and since it takes time to get to a moment all it takes is a moment to change time 💥, then repetition for them because some things come easy to us and other things come easier to them so we have to acknowledge this and it is. We have to realize not everyone is the same no matter what they label themselves or what they express. They are who they are, and who they are is based on the observer. people are different and some work differently and they are wired differently and each person is like a Manuel book. You could either read them or, you could ask them[the author] to speak to you from his world. And from there you could be enlightened 💫

lol I needed space yesterday when I came home and one dog had an accident in the kitchen... so I let them out... and I stay indoors when it's pollen season...I laughed when she said we don't need space from animals and plants.. I definitely do at times 😄

@love Yes they can be

Me too. Anyone who says pets don't need space, obviously does not have a young/energetic dog. They can easily become too much to handle if you are less energetic.

Absolutely!!! Chihuahua owner here. Small dogs are extremely needy compared to large dogs.

Same, my dog, my husband gets so annoyed that he follows him none stop!

No Mike. It often means that people need to recuperate from loud noises/other people's energies. Most people are actually scared to be alone.

Yap true.

You are correct, IMO. I was listening to a guru speak on this just the other day. Being comfortable when you are alone with yourself is a huge sign of spiritual progression and maturity. Makes sense if you think about it.

Yes and constant entertainment takes away from meditation

Exactly! One can’t learn by just being around people all the time. Some times our paths takes us to the unknown and sometimes we need to be alone to become stronger. If we rely to heavily on each other that is a whole no situation that would not end well. Team work is grate but to the point we can’t function or even think/defend our selves? Yeah no.

I totally agree.

Totally agree. Teal seems to be coming from the second wave process where she seems judgmental. It's a first wave attribute to rise above dualism and see the whole picture. Since she is stuck in 2nd wave dynamics us first waved feel judged for our unselfish love for ourselves and others.

The definition of an introvert is someone who is recharged from alone time and drained from socializing. Now, considering that we’re social creatures, how is it a good thing to be around people who suck your energy?

Well said Iam a introvert and artist and My boyfriend is a extrovert who wants to spend every minute with me.Drives me nuts!!

@@cassandrareedy7369 some really good insights here.

ForViewingOnly I believe you answered your own question

Just try it. Yes it will be hard, yes you will lose your mind, yes you will lose your friends/family/job. But at least things are real now.

well u r authentic

I think she's making a point to stop putting on an act ...it's not helping your depression in fact I'm sure it's contributing to it. People who love and accept you for what you are will accept you when you are depressed as well. The others don't matter.

Figure yourself out and raise your vibrations. Realize life is literally just an illusion or a game if you will. From my experience depression comes from an imbalance or blockages in yourself.

April Well said!

for real. I am always wary of people who are afraid of being alone/always want to be around other people. They usually can't function without someone around to perform for or entertain them so they don't have to deal with themselves.

Absolutely well said. I'm the same. I NEED and WANT time on my own. I do have a relationship but a long distance one and that suits me just fine. I'm very sensitive to loud noises (it's enough if I hear a child crying outside to set me off) and I am a writer which means I need peace to create. And yes people can be draining, because even though you are authentic yourself, when you deal with people there is always an exchange of energy. I have a friend who I find quite interesting to talk to but when we are together, we both talk in a high-energy type of way with lots of gesticulation and loud voices so at the end of the convo I am exhausted just by talking for hours lol. The energy between me and him entices us to talk all the time so the different types of energies and dynamics between people have to be taken into consideration as well

Well put!

I agree fully, and imho she def. has narc traits, thinks she has all the answers and loves telling ppl what to do and can probably NOT accept ppls Boundaries herself :D --the real ones, where they tell her they need Space to be allone at times, which actually is healthy and gives time to reflect and stay with oneself and own values and grounded. Never let anyone tell you otherwise. If you feel you need Space then that is what you do need.

people who get bored with others aren't engaging with what fulfils them because they are being inauthentic

You are so dense.

Nobody spoke of being with one individual all the time tho

Taking time away for yourself to do your own thing is natural and a seperate thing from feeling the urge to completely isolate yourself in an attempt to survive. It’s healthy to have your own space sometimes and then reconnect with people. What Teal is talking about is those who have gone through trauma where the relationships feels suffocating due to lack boundaries so people feel the need to isolate themselves and so the reconnection unstable and therefore the relationships are suffering. Being unable to communicate due to a lack of self awareness around other people (boundaries) is inauthenticity.

I understand how you feel 100%. I have been where you are. Hang in there.... slowly those feelings will start to change.

this😊

One Off + lol......Just don't get a cat then. They are notorious for plopping themselves down right in the middle of any project you try and work on.

I do the same thing haha : D

When I'm working I don't like to be bothered and I need space from my pets during this time to.

I also say it to my dog! 😂

Lol

50 of them to be exact xD

+Jimmy LeFirst That last line is what I said to a Narcisist. .

Jimmy LeFirst yeah take shrooms or lsd or dmt one time and then tell me that same paragraph.

yes! I always saw the grey areas in life but I was surrounded by Black and white thinkers.... these people never allowed me to be myself ,by always giving me advice, correcting me, or invalidating who I am... As a result I suffered from lost of identity because I was always directly and indirectly told I was wrong. Then I temporally developed social anxiety but Fortunately watching videos like this help me overcome it.

Some people see rainbows as well

Time with loved ones is great. Time to myself is great. Both things are true. And authentic.

Gerard Sanford if you need self reflection its because you have been inauthentic

She literally said that tho

That's what she meant by using it as a tool.

@@juliopena2098 I freed myself from the worry of being authentic, changed my name to Imaginary Universe and never allow myself to be seen in public without a mask. I hope you will keep my true identity secret. 😉

@@imaginaryuniverse632 haha I see do what you gotta do 😏

i disagree "staying alive" was written on a bridge

@@elisemartin8189 And most of artists do need contact so that they work is not abstract.

I literally actually wrote some of my best song lyrics on a bus. LOL.

@@CocoaErmine Try creating an art piece on a bus without person after person going; "What are you doing? Can I see? What's that? I can't tell what it is. You should have done this/that. Why are you drawing that?? That's really good but I have a friend/relative/whatever who draws and they are amazing, you should check them out. Basically that sucks. Etc. etc..." See how far you get on it that way.

It depends. Not everyone is wired the same.

Matt Kahn explains this beautifully... it's called the gift of space 🙌

Gr8 truth.

Aria Targaryen lol at times it’s so me

Wow, every time. I also imagine being filmed all the time and I get embarrassed about talking to my dog or dancing in my room like a total freak lol.

Iv been like this 37 now n realise its fucked up every single relationship. Got to point that I didnt know myself

breakingfoundations This resonates with me 🙏🏻✨❤️

triggered much?

yes you can because some people are exhausting . if we were dealing with 100% authentic people here, it would be easier to not need to recharge the batteries and have time for creative artwork . even if we had 100 percent angels I would still need my own to for inner reflection for self better ment and the betterment of my community and to create artwork... but we are surrounded by inauthenticity then we even more so need time away to purify our crystal minds ... to give authenticity back and recharge the whole system

you triggered much lol

I think so. I think the point she is making is maybe people who are draining is maybe THEY aren't being authentic and it makes you not be authentic too. Google Mirror Neurons. We tend to mirror people. I agree, sometimes some people I avoid because they are energy vampires and drain me with their constant talk, not conversation, but TALK. Maybe if we could be authentic and tell people, "hey I am really sorry but I can't talk right now" or whatever and get away from them, or even, "you are draining me with your talk", then we would be authentic to ourselves and that person wouldn't actually start draining us. Just my thoughts! What do you think>?

Yeah, you can. I found this video exhausting. haha #authenticaf

kkeep loving beauty

Lena Forsell You didn't understand the video lol.

Agreed 🙏❤️💜

Don't agree with this at all She's not always right ....... She's just a person with opinions, after all

Jaime Gribble I feel you .....no seriously I'm a empath too and there's a lot off life sucking vampires out there !! I need to recharge simple cos most of the folk I work with are babies in adult bodies and I simply can't be arsed we wiping their backsides 24/7 its their life lessons not mine ! I've got enough to be working on in my own life ...so I go home and recharge and mix we the few folk who r like me .Simple that's me and I AM .

preference of anything is not a boundary - she is talking nonsence at that point to justify her overstepping of healthy Boundaries!!!! Huge major red flag.

For some people, their preferences defines them (individualistic). They seek to achieve their goals. For other, it is how they make sense of things (nice people). They seek to achieve emotionaly harmonious environment.

Has anyone read The Betty Book where a spiritual medium deals with being thrown into a random environment ( by higher spiritual beings ) and remarked how she felt rapidly drained? In that she had to step back from the crowd to gather herself. I actually don't think teal is unaware of this at all. By becoming authentic with the outside world though about this issue is the only way it can improve. Eventually she was more vocal in her physical relationships with people who had self destructive tendencies. I think thats what Teal is trying to preach here: if we simply disconnect and don't communicate the truth of what we're feeling then the outside reflection of the world begins to deteriorate and we may become self absorbed to avoid the potenial pain of rejection or just fear owning responsibility to the world.

@@danielbarrera8391 yep finally someone got the meaning of the video

"Addicted to alone time" is pretty neat and accurate expression....

Love this thankyou 💗

agreed.

therefore teal swan never understands them.

Yes, smtms you do have to protect yourself. Point.

Queen Beast Of course she does.

i also caught on to that vibe in above vid. not all of it is wrong, it is important to be able to open up to another person, but this i will tell you who you are and how you should be patronizing, arrogant, from above attitude is allmost making me sick....but as allways those ppl are blessings in disguise for me bc they show me WHAT I DO NOT WANT and WHO I REALLY AM bc their BS causes a Reaction in me and i ask myself what do I want and how do I feel about this trully?

Actually small talk can be a very pleasant way to share energies in a casual way. I used to despise small talk but it is somewhat needed to connect with people. Words only make up a tiny amount of an interaction, after all. People you vibe with will pick it up fast enough and then your conversation can surpass 'small talk'. Eventually you open yourself up to connect with a wider range of people. When I do small talk it's more about probing mutual interest, and if that's absent I kindly move on. I used to be a loner and introvert, but by having a different perception of socializing it became much easier for me and also a lot of fun. And never about catering to someone's needs, but about sharing authentically, wich requires some guts. I guess also socializing is quite different for men opposed to women in some places. Ah well, drifting off, wich is good. I went from being socially awkward to being able to connect with a lot of people in a reasonably short time, and it feels good! Wanted to share. Best of wishes and love from the Netherlands

Haha

Now this I agree with!

Amen! so true.

This exactly to the tee what I felt. Thank you for confirming. Beautifully said. I notice sometimes she forgets that consciousness as it expresses itself on earth can often have extremely different realities that can be even beyond her understanding without actual experience, which is why there is no one person is right and knows all.

@@akashicrose5551 I find it funny how i also strongly believed teal was wrong generalizing this idea because i myself need space sometimes to meditate , reevaluate , analyze , re energize and draw conclusions helping me become a better , healthier and more understanding version of me. But after reading all the opinions that contradict teal here , opinions that i almost literally agreed fully on before reading them , they made me change my mind and approve this generalization without being pedantic. We , as " exception " of the rule , disagree with her this time but we forget that the truth and facts don t care about our feelings. My truth doesn t influence the fact that my inabillity to be me in the presence of highly tolerable or intolerable people does in fact make me be inauthentic regardless of the situation and context. It is entirely my choice who i deem realistically perfect to be my partner for life but that doesn t mean that my choice is the healthiest or best choice , it comes down to preference and limitated knowledge about myself and what i THINK i want not actually really need. If i can not be me without the need of alone time , unless it s a very brief moment , in my partner s presence then either i have work to do with my attitude , mentality and temperament or my partner doesn t or isn t capable of allowing me to not feel drained emotionally. Most of the time it is both more or less. If you actively search , really search people and can not find one single person that makes you feel seen , understood sufficiently during the time spent with them regardless of long or short then you either a serious problem at hand that you re complacent with and are in denial in actively accepting it and improve on it or you simply are incredibly unlucky to be in a very toxic circle of people. I , you and everyone else are as authentic as our traumas , character and intelligence allows us in the right kind of people. It s no shame to accept that there s a (valid or not ) problem with us and/or the people we choose to spend our time with. It s up to us to improve ourselves and/or help others who are genuinely interested to improve/become a better , more understanding version of themselves OR to be complacent and accept that hurting each other is more tolerable than trying to improve the situation we re all in emotionally.

i 100 per cent agree.

Actually, she hit the nail on the head for me, this is a problem I have been struggling with since i can remeber and I always thought it was because I was shy or an introvert. But I do have problems being myself because I was always so harshly put down yelled at and criticized with cursing and criticism

I actually disagree with this. Yes being drained around other people can mean you're not comfortable being yourself around them, but what if you're surrounded by really negative people who just want to destroy any sense of purpose or clarity that you may have. QUICK STORY: When I was in academia finishing an MA, I was ostracized by the department over an incident of bullying over social media where I was the target. My counsellor at the university also illegally released my health records to essentially feed the rumour mill. I filed a human rights case against the university but they denied doing any such thing. My family then turned on me in a similar way quickly after they started hearing about it from the "outside community" (disregarding the multiple times I attempted to speak to them about it). Anyway, I started seeing an energy / chakra therapist around this time, who told me that my amygdala was very heightened as I was living in a constant state of fear in my home. In a way, I can see this proving Teal's point that I was not being my authentic self around these people (family, community, professional colleaugues/supervisors). But is that really a state of inauthenticity or just an innate aversion to a hostile, negative environment? No one would obviously "just relax and be themselves" in this kind of situation --- or is that what she's suggesting? Is enlightenment then a disdain for safety and a total oneness with the moment? It's actually a curious question. Most ironically - I had 2 energy healers to help me cope with this / one focusing on chakra re-allignment, and another doing energy work. The first one told me I needed to drop all my friends because they thought they could disrespect me because of what happened and laughed, saying she couldn't imagine her friends "treating her like a dog.." (she was right, I did, and it was good), but again, how would you maintain authenticity in this? Both chakra/energy healers stopped helping me ultimately, the first one saying she believed she could help me, but it was too much to take on then because she had no time due to other clients and going on vacation. While the other one sympathized as she had gone through a similar experience of social ostracism, while being in a spiritual dance community where she lived with the members in a commune-styled house and had an affair with the teacher, causing her to move away to Hawaii for 4 years. However, since coming back she was rebuilding her life as a serious massage therapist / energy worker in Toronto, and didn't really want to be associated with someone the community had turned against. I don't blame these people or hold it against them. But it just goes to show, you never know who you're dealing with, and a lot of spiritual people are just as messed up, having all kinds of their own issues, and are consequently incapable of helping someone with any real degree of integrity when it becomes a community issue. If you really attempt to address these issues, most people will prove to be "inauthentic" in that, they will just shut you out or try to harass you. I guess it's not important and these "stories" are not your authentic self anyway, but I don't think it's always bad to seek out solitude. It's quite powerful and humbling actually, and if more people did it, maybe there would be more people with independent energies, capable of flowing above whatever is going on around them.

me too. As magnifite by this video as you. And it even makes sense in my story, bc basically I use that space to come back to people more streight inside myself and ao, more authentic. And I see and criticese my own fakes asnwers when they come.. is the way that gonna be right

dont listen to her. she is demonic

Yeeessss me too

lolololol

I love your comment! Very courageous to look yourself in the eye like that

Omg I thought the same thing, I initially got angry after reading the title but as I began to watch this video it was such an eye opening experience. I have a dismissive avoidant attachment style and this description fits accurately for me. Most dismissive avoidant attachment people come from an early environment of neglect so they believe that they have to give up on their identity to form connection with others.

🙏💖✨

I also believe there is a timing. We spread authenticity from the center of the self, so we have to first journey to the center of ourselves before we have anything to spread. We have no choice but to take this journey alone. We will share when we feel ready.

Aaaaand, when we are alone, we can work on certain things that help us with connecting when we are around others. In addition to getting in touch with ourselves, we have more uninterrupted time to explore our thoughts and feelings more deeply, to read, to write, to learn, to really develop and know who we are. I think most introverts can attest to this.

I think being alone to reflect is important, even for extroverts.

"I think there is some resistance in this video to solitude and focuses a lot on the shadow side of it rather than the light side of it." Yeah I agree about the focusing part (don't know about Teals resistance or not ;) ) Still, this video was a huge eye-opener to me, as I recognize my boyfriend having enmeshment trauma. He needs a lot of space, I need more connection. Now in the middle of resolving this (hopefully). There is contraction before expansion sure... but how lovely would it be to process through solitude together, to go inward in the same room, to just hold space for that, while you're together? I have a little bit enmeshment trauma, I can't really be myself with my mother, sooner or later I will need a lot of alone time away from her. So I understand what this feels like. I have identified myself as an introvert. I am now really wondering what introversion actually means. If it has anything to do with needing space. I think that Teals perspective that this is just enmeshment trauma/poor boundaries is true for me as well. Letting yourself be overstimulated because of that (in some weird roundabout way to connect by letting other peoples' energies in without any filter), and thus, needing a time-out. If I admit to my solitude in a room of people that overstimulate me, that I don't feel connected to, suddenly my boundaries are present again, I'm authentic, and I don't need any space anymore... AND I feel connected again. All of my needs are being met in that moment. I actually did this a couple of weeks ago and only now I understand what it means, because of this video, your comment and my thought process afterwards...

exactly!

Yes, that's exactly it: people have to be more uplifting to hang out with then yourself and your own vibe, and a lot of times that's a tall order, and most people aren't like that. So it's just easier to be alone and vibe out then deal with the hodgepodge of other people's thoughts all the time.

dani hydrant nope.

Silence is bliss.... solitude is bliss. Watch out. for Phony spiritual teachers.... Warning... Warning.

I love you !!!

Snaps