For the first story, I would've escorted Karen out of the kitchen and said, "if you come in the kitchen again, I'm calling the police, and please get your disgusting feet off the table. Your in public, not at home"
I had something similar happen. Some guy just had to take his shoes off. His waitress mentioned to him that he wasn't allowed to do that. He refused. So me, big mouthed teen, came up to him and said, "It's a restaurant, not a locker room". He put them back on. His wife was laughing
About story 4: i used the wayback machine on the post and found the “personal thing” was sexual bite marks and hickes on OP chest. Not all that bad…until you find out in the comments that charlie showed up 2 hours late to OP’s Nice’s baptism because he was gaming, made jokes at OP’s expense and then when they git home he gave OP the silent treatment.
Thank you for finding it and explaining the missing pieces. The jokes at OP's expense in front of her family, not attending family events like baptisms that he's invited to, and treating OP poorly with silent treatment as punishment because her family are his biggest fans, are -to me- valid reasons why her family would be so hell-bent on excluding this boyfriend from what could be their last Christmas with OP's father. The fact that OP isn't telling the boyfriend that she can either spend the day before or the day after Christmas with him and his family, but that the 25th she will be spending it with her father (without the bf), as there is a genuine chance he may not make it to the following Christmas is so silly to me. If the bf actually cares about her and can empathise that she's scared and wants to spend quality time with her dad before he passes, then he'll be more than okay with her spending the day with him and the rest of her family and not including the bf (who isn't family). If he throws a fit and demands he either also attends or she spends the day with his family regardless of the chance that her dad could pass away soon.. well then he's probably not a healthy person to have around long term.
For story 3, I wonder if his position on appearance would be the same if the roles were reversed. If it was the girlfriend neglecting her appearance. Not shaving legs, wearing old clothing, etc. I find it hard to believe that he wouldn’t have said anything about it.
Imagine if he told his girlfriend that her hair is too long and thats annoying him, because it tickles and leaves a mess everywhere she walks and that she needs to cut it. Same thing here.
no the comparison would be imagine if she told her to lose weight because she looks better in his eyes when she's thinner, the comments would crucify him
Literally, It is not fair that boys don't get that much right in a relationship then girls do, and if you try to avoid that by saying no to girls asking you out, you are immediately called gay
Story 3- The guys attitude about being asked to trim what he called a beard shows how immature he is. If a male or female really like someone they want to look nice for them. She wasn’t asking anything out of line. My husband has had a beard for years! He looks very handsome with his (full) beard neatly trimmed and not all over the place or long! He trims on a regular basis and always looks great. He is the love of my life and I also try to look nice for him! Yes, he can make suggestions and I don’t freak out!! It’s called having respect for your partner/spouse and most of all for yourself! Grow up and shave everyday and look as good as she thinks you are ! Stop being so lazy -if she’s not worth 5 minutes - please let her go !
For any family gathering and someone being told they can't bring their SO, well my mom had a great retort. If SO isn't welcome, neither am I. My mom actually used this on our family members.
exactly. I don't know if OP just has a hard time saying no to family, but personally as soon as they said my bf was not invited I would've just said "Well either were both coming or neither of us are."
as a general rule if someone tries to give me an ultimatum like that, they just are the automatic loser, I don't need that, and so if that is what you think our relationship is, there is the door... related or not.
Story 4: OP should have elaborated about WHY they hated the boyfriend. Is is due to first impressions? Are they racist? Is the hatred due to him being not as financially stable as they want? That info will go a long way.
He mentioned that he purposefully left out why he left it out when narrating the story. The OP did say why, Am I the Jerk just left it out cause it was very personal.
She wore a bikini to a family pool party still sporting bite marks and bruises from adult fun time, which made the family think he's abusive. Then in the comments she went on to explain he's also rude, generally immature, makes her the butt of jokes around her family, is disrespectful of others time as he has been late to several things with her family usually due to gaming, and gives her the silent treatment when he's mad. Charlies mom is also over invested in their relationship, probably because it'll finally get him out of her house since he and OP are in their 30s.
@@mindmaster323 big oof Knowing all that new info, yeah OP's family is justified. I mean with just the bite marks, I would be agreeing with AITJ that it's none of the family's business, but everything else... if he's treating them poorly that's most definitely their business. leaving that information out completely changes the story and AITJ is the jerk for misleading his audience.
Story 4: Its kind of hard to judge this story because you left out what the OP's boyfriend did, and the whole judgement is based on those details. Next time just share all the details because it doesn't make sense to tell this story without them.
I did some digging for story 4, and it seems Charlie is kind of a dick. First, OP is from a very religious, conservative family, and the main incident that is not named involves Charlie liking to bite during intercourse, namely he left teeth marks on OP's chest area that seemed to have left bruises. While wearing a swimsuit, mother and aunt saw, and refused to believe OP it was consentual and feel she is being abused, and then told other family members this skewed take. So it seems that only the Aunt, Mother, and Uncle knows about that incident, but not the father or brothers. The OP says since that incident, he has stopped doing that, but the family still won't put it behind them, hence the threat of telling OP's father about it, since he and the brothers would "implode" over such knowledge. At first, I didn't see an issue, but then I scrolled to the comments and saw this from OP: "When I first brought him home to have dinner with my mother and father, he was two hours late as he was playing games and there was a lot of traffic on the roads. He arrived late at a family function (baptism for my niece). He makes jokes at my expense around my family. He left the table during my niece's birthday party and sent back his plate of food and it infuriated my mother/brothers. I went to my brother once when Charlie was giving me the silent treatment and was really upset." So it seems it wasn't just that one incident, and he isn't a very responsible person and hasn't made a great impression even outside of the incident.
I know right like if the original poster willingly shared such details I don't know why he doesn't just sharing this is why I do not like this narrator I like the other two because they don't show as much incompetency as this guy and this guy has a strange bias that seems to favor the original poster heavily of course there are times where when it's obvious your original poster is in the wrong their in the wrong but in all honesty I think this guy needs to take a a hike and let the other two take over
So I just found another comment from someone who found the original story. The parts that AITJ left out completely changes the story. First the thing that was "personal" was honestly not the family's business. however what *_was_* the family's business is that Charlie was just generally an ass hole and he treated everybody poorly including op and her family. in light of that, yeah I'm definitely in the family's side of this.
First story: NTA. This woman just went there to be an absolute Karen for funsies. Who doesn't hear that the restaurant doesn't sell what she wants? And the feet, gross. She just was a Karen for being a Karen. I hope her boyfriend sees the light one day.
Story 4 without the info as to what happened I'm pretty much siding with the mom. Op truly sounds like someone in a bad relationship that tries to justify bad behavior. And if that situation is the parents first time dealing with him, she would be extra in the wrong. I could be wrong but I've seen people do this and her pattern of speech matches theirs
I did some digging for story 4, and it seems Charlie is kind of a dick. First, OP is from a very religious, conservative family, and the main incident that is not named involves Charlie liking to bite during intercourse, namely he left teeth marks on OP's chest area that seemed to have left bruises. While wearing a swimsuit, mother and aunt saw, and refused to believe OP it was consentual and feel she is being abused, and then told other family members this skewed take. So it seems that only the Aunt, Mother, and Uncle knows about that incident, but not the father or brothers. The OP says since that incident, he has stopped doing that, but the family still won't put it behind them, hence the threat of telling OP's father about it, since he and the brothers would "implode" over such knowledge. At first, I didn't see an issue, but then I scrolled to the comments and saw this from OP: "When I first brought him home to have dinner with my mother and father, he was two hours late as he was playing games and there was a lot of traffic on the roads. He arrived late at a family function (baptism for my niece). He makes jokes at my expense around my family. He left the table during my niece's birthday party and sent back his plate of food and it infuriated my mother/brothers. I went to my brother once when Charlie was giving me the silent treatment and was really upset." So it seems it wasn't just that one incident, and he isn't a very responsible person and hasn't made a great impression even outside of the incident.
Story 1: I hate customers like that. The Karen is pretty lucky she didn't get something thrown at her for walking into the kitchen like that. Also, her bf is quite the weakling too. I wouldn't want to be seen or dating someone as vile as that. Story 2: The bf here is a complete lazy bum. I still would've told him off before blocking him on everything, if for nothing else to get a point across. Story 3: If the bf is that unkept, then he's either too lazy, or just shouldn't try to have facial hair. Its fine if its grown out and well managed, but in this case, he probably looks very scraggly. Story 4: I dont know what happened.... or could've happened.. between Charlie and the OP, but the OPs family are being way too overzealous, judgmental and somewhat unfair too. Their personal business is their own and the family should stay out of it, unless they are asked for help/advice. The added gaslighting with the dad possible last christmas was uncalled for as well. Talk about super guilt tripping. The OP's family sucks. Story 5: I'm surprised the OP has been with this guy for over a decade, if the mother is acting this way and he's doing next to nothing about it. I would've left this guy, and his toxic mother, in the first couple of months.... not stick around for over a decade.
I did some digging for story 4, and it seems Charlie is kind of a dick. First, OP is from a very religious, conservative family, and the main incident that is not named involves Charlie liking to bite during intercourse, namely he left teeth marks on OP's chest area that seemed to have left bruises. While wearing a swimsuit, mother and aunt saw, and refused to believe OP it was consentual and feel she is being abused, and then told other family members this skewed take. So it seems that only the Aunt, Mother, and Uncle knows about that incident, but not the father or brothers. The OP says since that incident, he has stopped doing that, but the family still won't put it behind them, hence the threat of telling OP's father about it, since he and the brothers would "implode" over such knowledge. At first, I didn't see an issue, but then I scrolled to the comments and saw this from OP: "When I first brought him home to have dinner with my mother and father, he was two hours late as he was playing games and there was a lot of traffic on the roads. He arrived late at a family function (baptism for my niece). He makes jokes at my expense around my family. He left the table during my niece's birthday party and sent back his plate of food and it infuriated my mother/brothers. I went to my brother once when Charlie was giving me the silent treatment and was really upset." So it seems it wasn't just that one incident, and he isn't a very responsible person and hasn't made a great impression even outside of the incident.
I agree with story 4 3 and 2. With one, I slightly disagree because I wouldn't blame the boyfriend, it probably is his first girlfriend. But with story 5 I STRONGLY DISAGREE. This is because he probably loves his mom as much as he loves his girlfriend, and for some reason, no girl ever thinks about that possibility... Something happened to my dad, and my grandma turned out to be right, my mom AND then my step mom cheated on my dad
Actually you can call in an order for sit down restaurants but you're supposed to tell them if it's dine in or to go. I often order Whataburger through the app to get my food a bit faster
The story regarding the ultimatum between the boyfriend and family is hard to judge bc we don’t know the context that made the family not like him. If it’s a case where your family witness some legit f up stuff then I would understand them not wanted your boyfriend around… they don’t have to love/like your boyfriend just bc you do…
For the first story, the boyfriend obviously knew that the Karens behaviour was awful, hense the embarrasment and the large tip. I can only assume she must be amazing in bed or something.
Story 4 mom is not the butthole my sister is the same even though my mom is nothing but nice but every personal thing she tells him and openly blames mom for all her boyfriend’s problems even though he’s cheating on her but she refuses to leave him shes 17
first story: what's the point in asking if you offer something or something else when you are already showing the menu? just read (maybe read is too difficult for a karen) and choose. make sure you beg your boyfriend to check for ingredients that you may be intolerant, or allergic, to. there's a high risk you are intolerant towards most of them.
That beard thing... Honestly I understand his reaction. I have a good looking full beard but I hate when my dad say that I need to trim it. To me it is like telling some fat individual to lose weight or to tell someone to stop using makeup. I love my beard.
My mother is always telling me I need to trim my beard cause it’s basically all over the place. But that’s the thing it’s too short when she says this to do much of anything to it beyond running a comb through it occasionally
Story 3: my dad has to shave every week and he has no problem with it. I chose to do that it’s not that hard. But I also think that the op is in the wrong as well. It’s his face and he can do what he wants with his face. I’m not on ether of their sides. I think the op should have not said that he needs to shave but the bf didn’t need to be that mean
Guy in story 2 has no motivation like me but instead am looking for a motivation that can help me keep on going childhood trauma stopped me from working hard and trying and am staying away from relationships coz I know this will happen to me but tbh really am not a leech I do my own things Edit: I forgot to mention if I don't do my own shit I'd get disowned
@@PrincessLadyy No because I take consideration of my appearance to people who are close to me. If there was an issues like having hair legs or arms ect I would have no issue in handling it. But this guy went to a whole new level of being a cry baby. And was bring it up when she didn't say anything so sorry if you are butt hurt about me throwing back the same energy Buh bye 🤭
Maybe he likes it that way snd your sitting here telling me its ok to bully your partner into doing something he doesn't want that you want him to do regardless of does hes beard look good or not and what do you even know about growing beard? Sometimes you have to let it grow yo fill in the patches on top of that its his darn face and his choice
With the facial hair, I'm like that too. My wife also doesn't like my facial hair and keeps begging me to shave, but there's 2 problems. One, it often hurts even with a quick shave, and it leaves me red for days afterwards therefore I only like to shave very rarely. And two, even if I do shave it takes forever, and also I just bought a new shaver and even it can't get all the hairs (despite being that latest brand and being advertised that it should get all the hairs, but I'm not taking it back as I ditched my old shaver). So yes you say it might be 5 minutes, but for a proper shave it takes me like 25-30 minutes to get it all. This guy might have the same issue (also I have depression as well so that plays a small part).
Story 4 If the the family do not like the things the bf is doing to the op. Then they have the right to say hey we don't want that guy around us. And the fact that he decided to omit what is going on. Seems to suggest that it is some rather aggressive, and weird stuff. So yeah he can't come around because. He just ain't are kind of folk, so suck it up buttercup.
The omission is probably they made love and the parents didn't like it. But I feel like there's a piece missing here. Surely they don't hate him just because he exists. There has to be something we're not being told besides the omitted piece
Okay first off no shirt no shoes no service so if you can take your shoes off either put them back on and get your ass out, and second barbecue chicken quesadilla it's in the name
I had a friend a long time ago who had a rather toxic girlfriend who demanded he shaved his face because she hated beards, but refused to shave her legs because "You can't tell me to shave my legs. That's sexist" -_-
The toxic mon is committing a hate crime against a disabled woman every time she says the hateful things she says. I would absolutely tell the boyfriend to either tell his mom to stop or I'm leaving. Prejudice is unacceptable in any form. End of discussion!
Last Story: I hope that O.P. is strong enough to Walk away when he proposes and says, oh don’t worry about mom. You know she’s just like that. Put that ring BACK in his hand! Say THANKS but NO THANKS! It’s going to Hurt like Hell, but he’s Not going to take you seriously until you DO! First thing he’s going to say is: just like that? You’re going to walk away? You can tell him, you have been begging him to listen to you for a Decade! You gave it everything you had, but he brushed your efforts aside. No more. Just, No more.
The last one with the dudes mom. It wasn't just 10 years it's his whole life, he's conditioned to it because he's never gotten away from her long enough to see it
We are at an age our son owes us nothing. We are in his life because he loves us. I try so very hard to let go and keep my imput to upon request. He is 21 he is a college student and employed. He owes us nothing. Yes he needs us right now but some day he won't. I refuse to be one of these just no MILs.
Dear OP of the last story; my ex's parents were the same way and after over 10 years of marriage they treated me the same way, as day 1 so I'd send the kids and the ex to there house and stay home, believe its not going to get any better no matter what Ya do.
i don't agree that ultimatums are always a red flag. however this one most certainly is. In fact if I had been put in this situation, I would've been the one giving an ultimatum. As soon as her mom said Charlie was specifically not invited, I would've said "Well either we're both going, or neither of us are."
So i just found other comments that elaborate on that situation on parts that AITJ left out. With that new information, the story completely changes. AITJ, YOU are the jerk for misleading your audience.
With the toxic mom situation, I strongly disagree, he probably loves his mom as much as he loves you and if you don't realize that he loves other people in life, and not just you, that's really freaked up.
Toy story racer it's a playstation game, brings childhood memories, i used to play it a lot and the toy story game where u are buzz and try to rescue woody
WHEN THE KAREN SAID, I HAVE HALF A MIND TO: I INTERRUPT AND SAY, HALF A MIND SOUNDS ABOUT RIGHT FOR A KAREN THOUGH JOE BIDEN IS ABOUT HALF OF THAT !!!!!!!
I have a long beard at at times but I always try to keep it nice and trim just for one simple fact Gentlemen if your beard bothers her cheeks what do you think it's going to do in other more sensitive places shall we say??? In my opinion the dude just didn't like getting any nookie 🤣
It's not that weird to call ahead at a sit-down restaurant. I used to work at a sit-down pizzeria, and we would get at least 1-5 calls daily to pre-order for a dine-in.
For one she did not ask him to shave his beard, she told him to in a way that it almost look like asking. Two you do know 5 minutes a day, 7 days a week, four weeks a years is 1,825 minutes aka 30.4166666666 hours so I don't see where you get saying it is not long at all.
There's no problem with a guy not having goals or doing anything to improve himself. Of you're comfortable having a basic job and taking it easy in life then that's completely fine. Not doing anything for yourself, relying too much on others for everything and manipulating someone to bully another person is something else entirely.
For the charlie thing. I feel like we're not being told everything. I'm not referring to the omitted part (probably just Charlie and op having some intimate quality time and they were walked in on) but something not even mentioned at all. It feels like there is something Charlie did to cause this hatred. I doubt the ops family hates him just to hate him.
If he doesn't want to shave, he shouldn't have too. I'm sure she has something she does he puts up with too.... If if that much of a problem leave him but just because you feel he is unkempt doesn't really mean jack shit... And I don't really think he over reacted seemed more snide like most people would be when they're made upset about something
The ex from story 2 sounds like me, but more pathetic. I too lack motivation to do stuff, but I DON'T use women for my own benefits. Hell, I can't even talk to a woman without being a total introvert.
Yeah. Or if it was too long that she should cut it. It also smells of her not telling the whole truth. He clearly does care about his beard. I feel like its either miscommunication or ignorance And a growing beard does look messy. There is no way around. I Think someone has to tell her how beard growth works. And lastly Honestly. Let him style how he wants, he lets you do the Same.
1st story; why tf is the bf with her 3rd story; i personally dont care about my appearance much but i still keep my beard trimmed, especially my mustache
@@lelethemaddenlibrarian2217 it's not cowardice. You don't know why she went ghost. Maybe she didn't have the mental energy? Maybe she had tried saying something but to no avail and went ghost? You speak of accountability yet are attacking OP for doing something 100% justified and not going after the gold digging ex that 100% deserves to be ghosted.
@@tanandalynch9441 lmao if you don’t have the “energy” or control over your own mind, the only thing you can control in life , then you are fucked and life is gonna push you from place to place
What would happen if he judged her by her leg or just regular hair in general feminist Left and right would crucify the pore guy as a guy whit a beard myself it's not just some facial hair that beard means alot to a man and mans confidence its a self expression and basically for some guys who we are i had to shave my face Last year when my barber messed up i was depressed untill it grew back stronger. Let the man tame his own beard however he wants
If u stay with him then you are the one to bear the blame so I know it will hurt but u can get over it and find someone who really cares for you and not a gaint man baby
Story 2: just tell him he’s an absolute leech, inconsiderate, lazy, and a loser. Don’t defend yourself, don’t explain yourself, tell him he’s being an absolute leech. It’s the truth. Story 3: it’s his body hair, I think he should be allowed to have it his way. But, the way he’s acting ain’t great, he’s acting rather petulant. Maybe suggest some beard oil, it’ll make it less scratchy and more soft. I don’t think the OP can make their partner trim his beard, but I do think the partner is reacting in an immature way.
Story 3: Electric beard trimmer. Wouldn't even take 4 minutes. Wouldn't have to do it more than once a week... Or his course of action, but not moping and being passive-aggressive.
Okay the one I'm talking about is the very last story so I forget the guy's name but you need to man stand up for yourself into the young lady but all means get rid of them it's been 10 years and he is still not standing up to his mommy get rid of his punk ass you deserve better and as soon as you get rid of him you will find way better men are supposed to be there moments protector he's not doing that and he will never change so get rid of them the faster you get rid of them the better because that means the faster you can find a good man who's actually a man that will treat you good
Story 3 : what if it was him telling her to dress different or something else thats controlling but women can say or do anything that is just normal in my opinion even the person telling the story is stupid all 3 of them
*knocks* FBI OPEN UP hello person on the internet you were not first I’m sorry but the first police is arresting you for saying you were first when you were not first to avoid getting arrested by us you can always refresh the comments to see them please do not say you are first if you are not thank you I will now escort you to first jail
Idk about story 3 I’m a guy with a beard and my says stuff all the time about not liking it but I just say sit and spin I like my beard and that normally is the end I think he overreacted but still just cuz she don’t like it and says it’s unattractive that’s her problem
Story 3: she is the jerk, she should love him for his personality, not just looks, while both are acting ridiculously, she obviously just "likes" him for Facebook pics and whatever the hell
