Everything Wrong With Assassin's Creed In 13 Minutes Or Less 

9:24 Sin 91 He missed the conveniently placed haystack at the bottom, which caused him to desync. Everyone who's played Assassin's Creed has done that at least once.

probably my favorite part in the movie was when the kid messed up the bike trick in the beginning

They could've done the story of Edward Kenway from Black Flag and used Chris Hemsworth as the actor and it would've been a killer movie. Like cmon!

One of the things that gave me nerd rage in this movie is how they don't even get the terminology right. The assassin's organization is called the *Brotherhood,* the creed is just their motto.

"Does he remember mundane things?" Well Ezio remembered collecting feathers, soo... yes. yes he does. XD

I don't get why game-based movies go out of their way to change everything good about the games.

Here's a real commentary on this movie: I saw this very video pop up, said "Oh, is Assassin's Creed out already?", googled the release date, and found it came and went SIX MONTHS AGO.

Remember when the animus worked like a VR headset, yeah good times, but hey movie drama

u think those credits are long?...in the games even the cleaning person in the Ubisoft toilets gets her name shown...and in every language the game is available

Let me tell you something good about this movie; it doesn't have blindingly bright loading screens.

This guy is a savage. I want him to tell me everything wrong with my life in 13 minutes or less.

1:12 I'm going to use a James Kidd quote, that he says when Edward misunderstands the phrase "Nothing is true, everything is permitted" "You parrot the words, but you do not understand them"

"Apple fans - annoyingly loyal since 1492" Killed it, XD You just got a new sub

Actually the statement "nothing is true everything is permitted" comes from the real life middle eastern Hashashin the Assassin's were based on. The motto is often taken out of context in the AC series. In reality its referring specifically to religion as "nothing is true" means the rules of religion are not real and simply rules made by man and "everything is permitted" meaning things usually considered unlawful and immoral (murder, thievery, suicide, etc.) were in fact allowed and not the rules of any sort of higher power. Also fun fact the assassins IRL actually worked WITH the Templars during the crusades not against them. Annnnd then got slaughtered by the Mongolians only 100 years after they began.

I actually laughed out loud at "his ghost mom, presumably named Martha" Holy shit.

A thing that really fucked up my nerves hardcore was that the assassins in the movie cut the ring finger on their right hand. Canonically, it's their left hand - portrayed in ac1, ac origins. Also by the 15th century they didn't need to cut their finger (unless it was part of the initiation ritual, which I doubt) because the hidden blade's design had advanced considerably by that time.

Really surprised you didn't sin/mention the fact that 95% of this movie took place in abstergo, and that about 15 min of the movie actually took place during the inquisition with the assassins

"You were supposed to destroy the bad video game movies Assassin's Creed, not join them."

I watched this and I had never played an Assassin Creed game. I had no idea who was the good guy or the bad guy. If your audience doesn't know who we have to root for, you know f^cked up. +1 sin

I am a huge Assassin's Creed fan, but the movie was just terrible.

I would like to point out that, if anything, the game's story is more batshit insane than the movie's. However, it is *cohesive* and although it gets a little pseudo-science gobbledygooky at times, it still has a *consistent* internal structure that the player can follow. The threads of Assassin and Descendant are interwoven in a way that is entertaining and easy to follow (if weird). Also the Animus is more like the Matrix. None of this suped up Vive shit where the Descendant is physically performing the feats of the Assassin. But I guess they felt like they wouldn't have gotten the most out of buying Fassbender's time if he'd been laying in a box for half the movie.

We're gonna make this movie about an Apple to make the movie seem like even more of an asshole

I get that they wanted to make a new story, but I feel like it would've been ten times better if they just did the plot of AC 1 with Altaïr. I would've enjoyed it a lot more even though I know the story already tbh

I don't think this dude has ever played an Assassin's Creed. Also, him seeing Aguilar is something called the bleeding effect which is also how he knew how to fight

I played almost every Assassin's Creed game, am a big fan of Michael Fassbinder, a huge fan of the character Omar from the Wire, but none the less - that movie managed to suck balls pretty damn hard. They'd be wise not to make a sequel but, they probably will.

The movie was complete shit, but I'm mad that CinemaSins doesn't comment its huge historical flaws (for example they used a Spanish flag that wasn't invented until centuries after that or that the queen Isabel/Elizabeth looked nothing like the actual Queen).

"Apple fans- annoyingly loyal since 1492" XD

*"Apple fans-annoyingly loyal since 1492."*

people to Jeremy: "what are your qualifications of being a reviewer?" Jeremy: "I'm an asshole and I have a good eye for detail"

in the games if you don't follow what the ancestors did you desynchronize and lose the game

Please sin Resident Evil: The Final Chapter. You thought this movie had too many goddamn cuts? Resident Evil took one look and said "Hold my beer."

some of the sins could be easily explained: it's a fan service for gamers(doesn't make the movie better, but explains why it's there)

Apple Fanboys annoyingly loyal since 1492 ~Cinemasins

At 1:59 the father was speaking Arabic, NOT backwards spanish! He said: "لا شيء واقع مطلق", Which is pronounced: "la shay' waqie mutlaq ", and it means: "Nothing Is ِAbsolute..."

its funny because even people who have played ALL the games still didn't what was going on

As a fan of the games, I didn't really like the movie but I like how they included the bleeding effect.

"Oh Lord, wash away my sin" *Looks directly at the sin counter*

Yeah, about those 15 minutes of credits. I watched this film in cinemas with a friend, and we decided to see if there was a cutscene. We waited through the fifteen minutes of credits (I bet half of those names are made up) and were rewarded with some annoying logo of a dead bunny foetus or some shit. Then the guy who worked at the cinema asked if we had been waiting for a cutscene, after he watched us watch the credits for 15 minutes while he played on his phone, then, and my friend said yes, and he replied to him that we could've checked the reel or some shit and seen if there was another scene. This guy just watched us watch the credits for a quarter of a hour and only at the very end told us that we could've skipped it. Thank you cinema cleanup guy. Thank you

_I literally thought I had the Spanish version until 20 minutes in_

actually the reason it started on birds were assassins creed always had something about birds along with in ac origins at the end beyck had dropped a bird necklace and it showed to reason the assassin icon is the icon

At least the movie stayed true to the ending credits length of the games

When he was in the animus it's great but when he comes out the movie goes wrong

1:13 I don't blame you for not understanding the Creed's motto. You'd have to play the games, specifically the 4th, Revelations, to fully grasp its meaning. As the character of Ezio Auditore explains: "It is an observation of the nature of reality. To say, *nothing is true*, is to realize that the foundations of society are fragile, and that we must be the shepherds of our own civilization. To say, *everything is permitted*, is to understand that we are the architects of our actions, and that we must live with their consequences, whether glorious or tragic."

Well, calling "city" to Andalucia deserves a sin

This folks, is why one should never attempt to make movies out of games or animated series. Every time they fuck up the lore and kill the fans

he wasn't speaking Spanish backwards , he was saying the nothing is true everything is permitted quote in Arabic, the way Altair said it to Al mualim when he killed him ...that's a sin for you cinemasins *ding*

Aguilar speaks in Spanish: "The Apple is Everything" CinemaSins: "Apple fans - annoyingly loyal since 1492" LMAO

2:02 the man actually says "nothing is true, everything is permitted" in Arabic

Ah you missed a trick. When they open the box 13:37 you should have played the Apple start up sound.

You know, what I did like about this movie, is that the Spanish characters actually speak Spanish and not just English with an accent. I think just for that I can forgive some of the sins this film has. I'm a bit of a language and history nerd, so stuff like this actually make me happy

Assassin's Creed Edited on a Mac - copyright Apple 2016

They could've at least stuck with the original story I mean it can't be so hard to look for people who look like Desmond or altiar

Is it just me or did this moving NOT HAVE AN ENDING?

his ghost mom presumably named Martha lol

I wished you would have stopped around 9:00 to sin "Kristen Stewart" for the fact that she is a trained assassin, but during several moments of the fighting clips she couldn't even hold her own. She was a damsel for most of the fighting from building to building. Am I the only one who noticed this? How is she even an assassin?

he's not speaking Spanish back words he was actually speaking Arabic lmao!

watching the assassins creed game cutscenes is more entertaining than this movie

You know, in the sequel, they should focus LESS in present and MORE IN THE PAST

In the "inverse Spanish speech" part, he was actually speaking Arabic. :D

I've just been to Andalaucia, and its perfectly pronouncable and very geologically interesting XD

A sin on you cinemasins! Andalucía is a region in Spain not a city!

This movie is so beneath Michael Fassbender I can't believe it. You're getting one of the best actors I can think of and have him play a block of wood. Wtf

The thing I didn't like about this movie is how much of the games' lore they just ignored or assumed we all knew. They didn't once mention the Precursors, or Warren Vidic's creation of the Animus in the 80s, the Templar Satellite launch in 2012, Desmond Miles' time as Subject 17, what the Pieces of Eden could actually do, the fact that there's more than one Apple, EAGLE VISION, or really any of the moral and philosophical ideologies of the Assassins and Templars.

i was lost so many times during this movie. i saw it in cinemas when it first came out and i swear i still have no idea what was accomplished at the end of it

CINEMASINS. I BEG YOU TO DO SHARKBOY AND LAVAGIRL

To the idiots in the comments who keep defending this movie with the "you would understand if you played the games" argument: 1) A good movie should be able to tell a coherent story and take time to introduce characters we should care about on its own. It does not and should not use other sources as a crutch to tell who the characters are and what's going on. 2) I have played ALL the Assassins games and know the lore inside and out. None of the characters or events in this movie appear in the games or are even mentioned. So no, "just play the games" is not a good argument considering that doing so still explains nothing about why we should care about the story or characters.

The phrase "Nothing is true." is metaphorical, not literal. Ezio explained that "To say that nothing is true, is to realize that the foundations of society are fragile, and that we must be the shepherds of our own civilization."

I love how the movie expected us to know the most important features of Assassin's Creed but then just removes Desmond Miles as if we would be familiar with a new main character personally i would have wanted to see the story of Altair that wasnt shown in AC 1-3 after Altair became grandmaster.

SMH, i hate to admit it but all these sins are warranted.. i really wish they can get one game to movie adaptation correct for once!! please!!

The first game did a good job of keeping things vague when they needed to be. Also, the genetic code for free will is insane. In the game the apple was a device which could enslave or control people, it was also one of many. Movie is over complicating for whatever reason.

*fails jump* "dumbass" XD

they don't use time travel, he's not going anywhere in space or time, Abstergo is using his DNA to SEE into the past not TRAVEL there

don't forget, Michael Fassbender played as the titular character of the movie Steve Jobs. literally apple lover since 1492 hahahahaha

Lets just put it this way, the movie shat over everything from the games. Didn't even really follow anything from the games really. This was more like bad fan fiction as most adaptations seem to be these days. It didn't explain the conflict between Templars and Assassins, didn't explain the Piece of Eden. More like someone saw one or two of the video game trailers and noticed the Apple and thought "I don't know much if anything about the lore or conflicts within the game series and that's why I'm making this movie." It's just like when Ubisoft made Unity damn it. The movie is a failure to fans because it doesn't portray this shit properly and it's a failure to those who never played the games because they are not going to understand jack shit. So don't worry when 1/3 is over and doesn't explain a god damn thing. It doesn't when it's 3/3 over and it infuriates the hell out of me. I should have known something was wrong the second they showed them cutting Aguilar's finger off. I mean, sure, that was in the first game a thing, but this past assassin lived after the time of Altair and was basically during the time Ezio was becoming an assassin and they discontinued that practice when Altair took over. I assumed that this was like an older Animus when I saw the trailers, since each new one we saw in the games got more and more simple to now being basically a computer and an oculus. But no. Movie decides that it's going to take place in a universe where nothing in the games happened. Then sudden a new meaning to the maxim "Nothing is True, Everything is Permitted" comes in and I'm left wanting to punch everyone involved with the movie in the mouth.

Why couldn't they do the story of Desmond miles and Altaïr Ibn La Ahad

The movie should’ve implemented the first civilization visions Desmond sees in the game like Juno, Minerva and the guy

Andalucía is not a city, but a region of Spain. *CinemaSins Sin Counter: 1*

Only 13 minutes? There's so much wrong with this film, I'd expect this to be longer than the actual movie...

1492 wasn't "badly coincidental"- it was the year of the Conquest of Granada, which is the whole deal with the last Sultan(or whatever) giving over the apple and the deal with the Inquisition. It WAS Colombus' year, but that's a good coincidence, not a bad one

Theres no horse there but the animus doesnt raise him up. So hes trotting like a man riding a stick horse, with a very serious look on his face.

This flick is shit but at least 85% of spanish people in the film are actually spanish. That's something XD

To be fair I love the assassins creed games, But this movie just makes me want hurt the people who wrote some of this script, not all of it

"Unpronunceable city in Spain"? "An-da-lu-ci-a"it's not that hard.

This isn't time travel. This dude never played an Assassin's Creed game.

Mad Max: Horsey Road coming to your theaters never.

As anyone pointed out that Andalucia is a region and not a city yet ? I bet someone as already. I will still point out that Andalucia is a region and not a city.

I was hyped for this movie I slept during the movie I didn't regret a thing

Assassin creed: So we have many characters that you can work with. And diffrent stories that the fans love. Hollywood: Yes Assassin creed: Which character do you wish to do and with what story line so we can help you guys set up. Hollywood: Nah we are only taking a couple of your things and making a brand new story that doesn't match up with the game/story. Assassin creed: ....??.. What Hollywood:*gives The money to company* shhhhhhhhh no one will realize. Literally almost everyone: How does this even fit in at all?????

How did they mess up this movie?? Just have them do awesome assassin stuff not put me to sleep within the first 10 minutes.

My 4 year old niece just called you "CinnamonSins" and now I'm dead..

Actualy, Granada was never conquest with a battle. The city was surrendered to the Castillian Queen. And there was an actual spanish flag, when it was created in the 18th century

Normal day on assassins creed Knock enemy out Put on boat Go to the middle of the ocean Throw in ocean Watch them drown Feed sharks

Andalucia is not a city in Spain, it's an autonomous community in southern Spain. Basically is like if you were saying "The city of British Columbia in Canada". *Sin removed for bad research*

Whoa! When I watched this movie there were NO subtitles. Like I had no idea what was happening for 3/4 of the movie.

You know what I find insulting that Ubisoft considers the movie canon when they make mistakes everywhere. - There are more than one Apple -The explanation for the Apple is not only garbage it also makes no sense in the movie. In the game it's from a ancient civilization but in the movie Sophie DAUGHTER of the CEO of Abstergo industries thinks it's for some reason perhaps a God. - The Templars come over as religions people but they are not. I could go on it's sooooooo annoying

The eagle is the spirit of assassins creed

"Cut! Cut! Cut! Cut!"

*Everything Wrong With Assassin's Creed In 5 Seconds Or Less* "This movie exists." _DING!_ Sin counter +1000

>_> as a giant assassins creed fan and I do mean giant I was pissed off at the fact this movie was made, this should have started with +900000000000000000000000000 sins for making this movie

to answer your question, rigor mortis can be early set on by exhausting your muscles before death(like fighting or strenuous work out.... see the standing death of benkei) meaning she's been fondling that necklace for hours.