Explain narcissism to others using the C.R.A.V.E.D. method 

True...i add to that therapist !!!!brave woman!!!!!

The Person/Therapist that can explanation the best way of a NPD!

🙌Yaaas!🙌

Hello fellow MM! Fellow surviver!

@@giraffefree6143 So true 💪🏽

And blames you 🙄

This should become a meme 🤣

😂😂😂😂😂😂 I am in stitches 😂😂😂😂😂

Great analogy...and funny! 🤭

Perfect analogy

Great visual. Thanks!

Thank you for this

Helpful mnemonic!!

You're the MVP! thank you

⭐️

One habit I got into to avoid talking to jerks is to simply not answer any number that I don't recognize. It's a bit inconvenient but I don't have to talk to narcs and telemarketers.

@@sparkygump i used to do that and I wish I could but I am my mother’s caretaker and always receiving calls from nurses and so on. Idk maybe I’ll have to change my number.

@@sparkygump I do the same. I rarely ever answer my phone and find that most don’t leave messages so oh well! 🤷🏼‍♀️ It’s much more peaceful this way.

@@MadisonWestfield I’d definitely change my number if I could. That would be a much easier option even with all the amount of updating I’d have to give to others. I would suggest that if you do change it and there’s common relationships in your life with him then, where possible, either infirm not to give it out or, if they aren’t healthy and safe for you to be around, don’t update them to keep you and your new number safe. Blessings to you! 🙏🏻💞

Way to go!

Thank you!

Thanks for doing that. It’s very helpful.

I totally agree with this. However in a court setting, HR setting, or a mediation setting, that is not always possible. These are good tips for beating around the bush for times when using the word "narcissism" could backfire against you.

Thank you NS...good advice

SO true... I feel the same way.

I don't know anyone that knows about NARCASISM other than people making RU-vid videos about it and I never talk with them.

That’s often a dream world or an isolated one...most don’t want to get it because it is too uncontrollable, and chaotic and therefore uncomfortable and taxing. Much easier to live in their world of cognitive dissonance because it’s not their issue.

@The Time is Now it just seems impossible to deal with someone like that.. you just can’t win

Yep, that s why no contact is the only way!

@@Crmsnvrgo150 same ! They treat you like crap, then wonder why you stop jumping though hoops for them !

That was it exactly for me. I refused to let my narc parents bleed me dry, and for some reason that made me the bad person.

@@om617yota8 I hear you on that one. Solidarity to the children who were abused and abandoned and then abused some more for not laying our lives down for our abusers later in life.

Please consider going to a a 12-step recovery program such as Co-dependents Anonymous (CoDA). There are CoDA meetings all around the world, in many languages, online, phone-in, and hopefully in many countries again when the Covid19 risk is lower, in-person again soon. These are helpful, supportive places to learn, share and grow, hear the shares of other members, and find healing. CoDA is a place where people who are victims of all kinds of abuse, people just like us, can find healing and learn we are not alone. CoDA and other 12-step recovery programs are free. There is such a sense of relief to hear others and know we are not alone. Although not specific to narcissistic abuse survivors, 12-step programs like CoDA can be a life-saving. All of us survivors have a right to our own self-care, healing, and no more abuse. Sending you positive energy and healing thoughts to all here.

Yet when I tell them.why and educate them (which is often taking so much energy)..they think I'm playing victim to denounce the narcissist. Drives me nuts

You nailed it... the humiliation is rough... having to tell others around you is hard. People dont understand how hard it is to figure out a covert narcissist. By the time you do, your hearts in it deep and it's hard to walk away.

I've started to look at it differently. I know, and if others can't get it, maybe they haven't empathy either. I know, and I know how to protect myself. Trying to convince anyone else is of no benefit to me and not worth my effort, I can be doing things I like! I now know my worth. Reframing it can help

@@villasoka884 100% agree! Why waste the energy trying to explain? That just prolongs the pain. Now that the fog has lifted (thanks to Dr. R) I see clearly, I can breathe and feel joy. Cheers!

Dark indeed !

Homeacre 😂

Yeah...and scary too... but very informative. Cuz they can be very dark and scary...

Yes, it’s absolutely like that. We need to be very careful about not joining “the big lie”. Someone is all dark, and we are all light. Not acknowledging our own human darkness opens us up to narcissists and makes balance impossible.

Everyone is a victim. Everyone is a perpetrator. This lady is telling you what you want. All of the psych people make up whatever works and their gospel is a river of unending misery.

What a moron! This is a danger of going to therapy with them.

I completely relate 💯. Praying for you! 💞🙏🏻

I can definitely understand...very frustrating and hurtful when you’re trying to get some help but your experience is minimized by the person supposedly there to help you.

You'd think we are meant to see them to make their lives easier. Growing up I knew they had to oblige to a rather archaic system. And for some they became swallowed whole and live it day by day.... No fu#king way! 👍

I agree as someone who has encountered this but also as someone hoping to practice in the field, I also see so many people abusing this term or just calling everyone this when it's not matching up accurately. I think the big thing is that therapists don't do enough probing and clarifying to understand the frequency, as well as see the "whole" thing. They focus on one tree indeed of the forest and assume it could be other issues like common collectivist culture issues or minor Narcissistic traits which aren't quite as difficult as being in a triangle especially if symptoms are high. I also don't think demonizing the individual with the issues helps especially if there's a power dynamic they need to consider like if they are paying for it...etc. I'm curious what is a way that someone can easily identify this issue since many therapists just go into CPT and PTSD treatment stuff which can help to work through it, but then you just keep getting retraumatized and needing treatment or end up in unhealthy relationship cycles endlessly, whereas if it was identified quicker, they can suggest stuff like this. It's also just tough when therapists can change up or if the issues are minimized, it just ruins rapport. It's also difficult when clients can't identify these issues accurately (i.e., people saying something is abuse, when it's really not can confuse the therapist more, especially if the client has their own mental health issues as well). Does anyone have any ideas on what you wish a therapist would have asked so that it could have been accurately understood sooner? I'm thinking that evaluating dynamics in multiple environments might help, as well as having enough facts and evidence from behaviors with others, that they also see, or even discrepancies in treatment between family members? That or even trying to understand if the client truly feels validated and checking in on them. Like if they're invalidated or feel like what's being described isn't matching up accurately enough to cultural situations or something else, that the therapists might try seeing if this description matches up instead?

Jess_if you have felt ‘broken’ for a long time you may want to look into Complex PTSD. I think Dr Ramani has videos. Also a book ‘From Surviving To Thriving’ by Pete Walker.

And the "E" for no/low Empathy!

Coercive control too. This is really instructive advice for explaining. to others

Yes! Goes back to rigidity

Yes! SO true. Thanks for this perspective.

Great discernment thanks👍

Love that distinction! So helpful.

Extremely well said. 👍👍😎

That's it exactly! !! Bullshit artists . And when it arrives on the plate in front of you, all that's there is an under cooked processed sausage.

Yeah I know the feeling.

And the dismissive eyeroll is like the icing on the cake.

Most people also have no idea what narcissism is so I use the term pattern of behavior.

So true.

You're right!!

sometimes just hearing their voice can exhaust a person

D - Defensive. Which, plus Disregulated, is extremely Draining .. and sometimes Dangerous. . .

Draining for real.

Yesss they DRAIN the hell out of you ,after being in conversation for like 5 min you feel you need something strong to give you energy

Yep they are definitely energy vampires

Yes! The constant negativity is so nauseating.

I do that sometimes, I used to say it alot as a teenager, everything was embarassing to me, I didn't realize until my adult years and through more and more therapy, that it was a way to avoid feeling shame from all the abuse I went through. I don't do it so much now. When the abuser uses it, it's to control and manipulate you. For them it's about what they do or don't want you to do. CPTSD is a very humiliating disorder because it makes the person feel crazy or like they're the one in the wrong and it's not the case....

Good point!

Idk why you find it so easy to say what they did. Usually the other person excuses what they did

Idk why you find it so easy to say what they did. Usually hard to describe and doesn’t sound that bad. And the other person excuses what They did

@@M_SC I don't about you, but the stories I have about what my narcissists have said and done to me are pretty obviously bad. I tell the story and people get it. My most efficient story for my ex is I tell people that one time while I was crying after some verbal abuse I can't even remember, he cooly and calmly came up to me and said "Hey, some guys like me marry and have children with women like you. I didn't DO that to you. You're lucky." And then he just walked off. I have too many other stories, but usually that one alone sends shivers up peoples spines ... forget narcissist he's probably a straight-up sociopath I was indeed lucky to escape.

Very good!!! WOW!

Narcissists could care less if you tried to anyway.

That is positive as long as you’re part of the solution. We are all together, modeling being all together by acting in love for ourselves. Narcissists magnetize to people who have dissociated from their original attachment wounds. This isn’t about “them”. If we don’t get the lesson, we don’t get the boundary.

I think of a phrase I have heard lately--something like..." Don't complain, don't explain". There are so many narcissists around us. It is vital to maintain composure when meeting new people. If you "complain" you may be oversharing and it may be vindictively used against you. If you "explain" you instantly message your lack of healthy entitlement (that you need the person's approval). Or perhaps it is that you instinctively sense the persons potential for aggression and your "explaining" announces that you accept being the "one down" which reinforces the narcissist's control. Of course this does not apply to those who have earned trust and who are supportive, accepting friends or loved ones.

@@occallie Agreed… wasting your time… it is what it is no changing their ways… move on

@@WDBDWK Agreed… fix you first…

They really do! 🥺

My therapist didn't like labeling people so I spent 3.5 years talking about my ex who desecrated my spirit and poisoned me. But he had no label. Good for him.

That’s horrible.

@@Darkangel03975 hi i think i do get the plot of what u hav just described but can u plz edit and correct the typos as i wud like to understand ur writing better?

Im so sorry

Me too. More harmful than helpful

Worse yet, the "when" sometimes didn't even happen. My sister is trying to punish my mom for things that "happened" years ago that didn't even happen, she just clams it did. Now... my mom did fail her as a kid, but that's a completely different story, and mom was young, trying to raise three kids, with an unemployed narcissistic husband, her family of origin on her back, and a relatively small wage, it wasn't exactly easy for her either.

@@MultiSenhor It can go both ways, my mom couldn’t malign her brother enough for acting out resentments towards their parents, and then starts “getting even” with me as an adult for triggering her self-consciousness as an inquisitive child. Drawing the parallel for her (predictably) didn’t go well for me.

They NEVER let an injury perceived or real, go unpunished - a catalog is kept forever.

@@MultiSenhor their minds perceive and filter events and experiences largely as threats that don’t always align with reality. No capacity for empathy or genuine compassion either … thus no forgiveness for human failings

My nurse training led me to document the crazy interactions with the narcissist. Dates, what was said and done, - all there to look back on and see the patterns and BS. This has saved my sanity because all the crazy making is there in black and white.

Funny isn’t it. Because I’d say a Dr makes the same diagnosis in the same way, but just because of their title it carries more weight.

Never to late!!! You deserve it!

@@acemoto6232 Thank you. You are right. There is still some gas in a tank.

There is an old saying, "it's only to late if you dont start now"

I hope not!

Same here, and no, it's never too late. I'm 59 and although the healing process is painful, it's such a relief to know that I'm not the crazy one.

You are so right!

you are a wonderful friend...!

Yep that's been my experience. I don't use the 'narc' word anymore except with dear friends who are on the same page as me.

@@tenzen8334 Yep, it’s as if, the moment you say “narc” people act like the narcissist has a problem - and you’re that problem. I don’t speak at all about it anymore. You start to realize that, even when a person says, “That’s just HORRIBLE! I’m glad you left!”, they are waiting, with baited breath, for you to get back in the situation. Especially so, if you have an aging parent. People are so brainwashed by filial piety that, even if they really like you and have never met your parent, they can’t even see you, for the worry you aren’t doing right by an abusive parent. It’s sickening!

@@privateprivate8366 SPOT ON! I've stopped talking about it to anyone except my counselor. People are just so trained to defend parents, nomatter what.

@@themaggattack if they actually even saw that parent with a gun to your head, they’d chastise you for pointing it out and running for your life and would derive, from that alone, that you must deserve it. When it comes to dealing with having an abusive, narcissistic parent, you may as well be an escaped slave.

And then the listener turns into a flying monkey and betrays you. My ex used to cut my neighbour's grass. It was very anxiety producing last year. He'd cut the grass then show up at my back door. I had to keep the doors locked all summer because if I didn't answer, he'd let himself in!!! This year, my neighbout queried me about who was going to cut her grass. I asked her to "please not hire X again". When she responded with WHY?, (in a contrite way) I should have caught on..... I told her "he makes me anxious and uncomfortable, my anxiety goes away up.., and after 15 months he shouldn't still be hanging around,.......please don't hire him". She went and called him about the job!! What a miserable, petty, nasty, untrustworthy thing to do! He's just transient, but I live next door. I've helped her out a lot. But that has just ended. She fits what Dr Carter calls a Stealth Narcissist to a T.

Come back and tell us what happened?

Good luck.

@@dreamdiction Hey there. I actually wrote out everything in a Google Keep Notes, uhh, note (lol) after everything was over. I'll copy paste what I wrote below, and try to edit out my brother's name (if I miss a spot, I am so sorry 😅). July 9, 2021, 10:05pm: Alright, I had an interview with a guy from my town's local adult protective services, named John, with my brother, and a family friend named Sandy. We all went to the backyard of my house, while my mom stayed inside the house (she couldn't join because John had allegations against her, so he wanted to interview me and my brother without her being there to possibly influence us). Sandy mostly listened, but she did speak to answer questions about her opinion on what we were talking about. John asked us about the allegations, and we all answered truthfully according to what we knew and/or remembered. He asked if mom had touched me inappropriately, even naming specific places on the body, and I answered by saying all the times I remembered her touching those areas, how I felt about it, how I responded when I felt brave enough to speak up to her about it, and what mom did in response to me doing so. John then asked if we were afraid of our mom, and we said yes, because of her anger, being prone to yelling and cursing, and the fact she's threatened to both kick us out when she knows full well we couldn't take care of ourselves 100% if she did, and use her power of attorney over us to restrict and/or take away things like our money and medications. John then asked if we felt like wanting to move out of the house, and we both said yes, because of how controlling she currently is with things of ours like clothes and looks. John asked if we knew how to handle our finances, and we said no, because mom does them all for us. He asked if we wanted to learn how to do things on our own, like handling finances and cooking, and we said yes, but we don't want to be taught by mom, mainly because of her pessimism, and low patience. He asked if we wanted to get a social worker/caregiver in to help teach us those things, and at first we said no, because of mom's distrust in people and her tendency to yell and curse whenever we've done or bought something, with previous social workers, that she didn't like, no matter how small of a thing it was, even though we should be able to have the ability to spend a certain amount of our own money we want on whatever we want, and not be punished for it. John then gave another solution to stay in a foster care home, but with the drawback of that being where our lives stop improving if we did, so we disagreed with that option. Since we didn't want that, and didn't know how to take care of ourselves if we were to move out right away, we decided to stick with trying to find a social worker to help teach us things now, and eventually go to a college-like (but not actually a college) program to learn some IT skills sometime later this year (which we were originally planning on doing before the interview). We then went back inside and John gave a small summary to mom of what we said, which only included the fact that we wanted a social worker to come in to help teach us things, and that we were wanting to learn how to be more independent. Sandy did the same as John, and only mentioned those things, and not the things we were afraid of mom knowing. Although, the reasons John gave for the things he said were that we "felt trapped in the home", and that mom needed to teach us more about the things she was doing for us. Mom then responded by saying that she WAS in fact teaching us things, but we were refusing to follow through, or even refusing to learn some things (which is "technically" true, but we usually "refused" because of the WAY mom was ACTING when she was telling us to do things and tried to teach us things, which discouraged me from wanting to do them and/or be taught by her, and NOT the FACT she was doing them. But I can't tell her the real reason why, because then she'd take it personally, and use the yelling, cursing, and threatening to get her way no matter if we liked it or not). Mom also mentioned that we told her before that we didn't want a social worker (although she forgot the part where we said we didn't want one NOW during that time, but we're fine with getting one in AUGUST, the second half of which we said again today). John then left, as he had to go to another client, and said he'll see if he can try and get a social worker to come in. After that, mom had went over the same things she told John, and Sandy went over the same things John told mom, before leaving. A little over an hour later, mom had started expressing her anger (like she usually does), and saying how much she hated the situation. She claimed that John, as well as Sandy now (at least accounting to mom), believed that she was "being too nice" to us by doing so much for us, that she needed "be harder on us from now on" (Oh dear), and that the two of them were "too American" because she believes they thought that the fact she slept in the same bedroom as me and my brother (but in separate beds) meant that she was being too controlling, when to her, it's simply a Filippino tradition, because she's from the Philippines (even though the reasons she gave me and my brother in the past for that was because at an earlier age, we wanted her to, but when we got older and mentioned we wanted her to go back to her room, she said that she herself wasn't ready yet, and that she even liked it down in our bedroom.) She also mentioned that it we keep "refusing" to learn, then she'll not only have to write it down and document it to show it to John, but that she'd also be the one to get in trouble for it because everything falls back on her, that "It will be YOUR FAULT if 'I' get in trouble!". To fix that, she finally moved back up to her room, and said that WE will be the ones to get a social worker, and that we WILL learn how to cook more. She also mentioned that she wasn't angry at us, which even if it is true, I still felt like she definitely took that anger out on us. I myself got pretty mad at the way she expressed it to us, but unlike her, I didn't let a single bit of it out, because I know if I expressed just a tiny amount of what she did (or even if I just did or said something she only THOUGHT was that, but actually wasn't, with no one else being around to judge that but her alone) she'd then use the tactic of threats that I mentioned earlier. And I'm afraid if I pushed her further, she may actually follow through on said threats.

@@jonathanalpart7812 Thanks. 😌

Jane! Girl you’re the smartest!!!! Really. I could not have even processed all of that while I was living at home w a narc mother. So good to hear that you live in a county where social workers are paying attention, and trying to do a great job for you. Kudos to you for reaching out for help, listening to suggestion, and changing your mind about getting a case worker of your own to help not ONLY you, but your brother also. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🌺 There is NO POSSIBLE WAY I could’ve done that when I was in your situation! I just became angry , and was soooooo immature until I was approx 32!! I finally realized I needed some guidance and went to a codependency meeting like Al- Anon. It was called Gam Anon for friends and family of compulsive gamblers. GREAT JOB , JANE. GOOD FOR YOU!!! And good looking-out for your brother, also. You’re gonna be JUST FINE. Keep up the good work and take care of YOURSELF!!! Wishing you peace and love❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🌸🌸🌸🌸

Don't go DEEP for a CRAVED person.

Deep?

@@liviamoreiralima3536 Please watch this video: Narcissism and the deep technique ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-7HcU3sdrzU0.html

@@liviamoreiralima3536 dr Ramani’s other acronym.

@@liviamoreiralima3536 one of Dr. Ramani's other videos: Go D.E.E.P. with a narcissist: 1. don't Defend 2. don't Explain 3. don't Engage 4. don't Personalize I try to practice this like a daily prayer/reminder. It can be hard but there is much wisdom in the DEEP technique for dealing with narcs.

Bless your heart I understand! I also had Narcissistic parents, siblings and my ex husband, last relationship, and many ex Narc friends. All screwed me over. I am also struggling with my own issues. I am able to love myself and not settling for BS anymore but I'm so traumatized by the abuse I have no desire for a relationship again. Don't think I can trust anyone again especially after being abandoned with a baby and child when my Narc husband ran away with another girl. I'm stuck being a single Mom and it's hard. I choose to invest in myself instead of wasting it on toxic people. Other people who help me look them up, Richard Grannon, Aaron Doughty, Evy Pompouras, and David Goggins. Love and hugs to you, believe in yourself you're worth it and don't settle and pay attention to your gut feeling, if you get a bad feeling about someone cut them off! 💜❤️🤍

Keep going, keep trying.... improvement happens !

When I had enough! I felt broke! A 🔥came out of me that would torch anyone that I perceived as flying 🐒 I Quit my family!

@@vhayashi7369 thank you for sharing the youtube names.

The example addition is important.

Exactly its important to give examples under each letter of CRAVED...because even clinical psychologists don't like us using it as a buzz word, even if we KNOW by now clearly what is narcissism

Praying for you.🙏🏻💞 I’ve been going through it for 15 years. First sole custody was “won”, but the long game continued...creating a false narrative of blame and character assassination. Lost my children after 12 years...they never quit. So much trauma, destruction and chaos. These people are murderers from the inside out.

Ditto Esther! A horrible process to divorce a narcissist when you have been beaten down for many years!!!

​ @Tina Marie We always get what we are seeking for. Women like self-confident male's who knows what they want and who stick to their opinion no matter what others say, right ? It gave you image of a strong man, and woke up butterflies in your stomach right ? Then you got what you wanted, a man that sticks to his opinion no matter what others say. Why do you think that most narcissists are males ? Because women like such males until they know them better, but everything has it's price.

@@Temporalplace Women are not a monolith. I, for one, don't like don't like ANYONE who is so pig-headed that they NEVER change their opinion, given new information. I don't care what gender they are. Also, sure, the studies show that most narcessists are males, but that's only *diagnosed* narcessists. There are a WHOLE LOT of *UN*diagnosed covert narcessists out there, many of whom are female. In reality, narcessism is anyone's game. "We always get what we are seeking for" is victim blaming. Besides, if that were true, there would be a lot more rich, successful, talented, etc.. People out there in the world. And certainly no one would be living in slavery or destitution. Sometimes we get borne into or pushed or tricked into a bad situation that we weren't seeking for.

​@@themaggattack "is victim blaming" Why can't anyone blame a victim if its really result of his choice ? There is no point to blame a lion or tiger after you entering his cage, because it was something avoidable.

100% agree too

Same. I’m visiting my 90 year old mother. Seems her personality has gotten worse with age.

I was just saying this to myself today.

Going through a divorce, this has made all the difference. She calls me a narcissist and accuses me of gaslighting without explanation, assuming people will just believe her. I describe the actual events without judgement or labeling, allowing people to draw their own conclusions.

I had been trying for years. I still haven’t found one. If you say you were in a abusive relationship they act as if YOU are suspect. I was actually asked by therapist conducting a required interview for medical purposes, “What did YOU do to them?” I would NEVER consult with that therapist even if I needed her while I was going through treatments.

Learn your own punishment. Saves alot of cruelty and despair in a world.

Thank you for sharing this! May Almighty God continue to give you strength and courage in your new journey of great hope, health, and healing! Love and Blessings ✝️🌺♥️

OH MY GOD 😳

It would have been better if he said he was a psychopath or sociopath people with NPD are not bipolar unlike people with BPD narcs can control their emotions they just don't care or feel the need to. Good luck for this person to prove his argument in court

Do you have any links to stories about this event? I believe you and all, but, I just have to check this out.

The system has brainwashed people to dismiss the truth.

Good luck! Be strong! You can do this :) I believe in you

@@DelphineTheWorstBladeEver Thank you dear! I am scared within myself. But I'm not showing it to outside. Especially when i think : what if they don't belive me, what it they think I'm exaggerating.. Etc. I'm scared, real scared he will try to make me the violent, because i have thrown things like pillows and coffee on him when i would lose my plot becsuse he'd never let go until i break. I regret so much for reacting that way, because he will most definitely use it against me. He might even try to take my baby off me.. Im terrified to death now. I'm just starting to bring this to the surface and get help. And I'm sure he will say im crazy and lazy, dangerous and what not. I'm not looking forward to it. I'm scared, but I'm still doing it.

@@sabat8068 omg, I used to do the same, I would throw things at him n then think I m evil. Until last year, after 40 yrs of marriage I decided I will not be gaslighted. I started meditation n would just leave the room. I totally distance myself from him and then he went for my friends, started becoming nasty to me in front of them n behave rudely with them. I have now had enough, I hv left home but want to be totally free from his clutches. Hopefully my dream of freedom will come soon. You hang in there and don’t waste your life, take the kid and go… good luck.❤️

Because the entire system is narcissistic and most of the people in power are CLuster Bees. They have manipulated the minds of the masses to dismiss the truth in almost every form.

when you're stuck at work and people don't let you LiVE! lol

.... relevance accurately describes the narc at work. She typically goes off on a tangent, talking about things that have no relevance and at the same time twisting words in a gaslighting way then morphing into a word salad. It's all very effective in both steering people off topic and in ending the 'discussion'.

Our family narc was a devotée of that Wayne Dyer kook in the late 70s and weaponized it. It's really bizarre and so tiring to see this potentially uplifting information used like this. Stay Strong 💪

It’s very true. I have many in my life like this. Truly crazy making. The blameshifting and ridicule is off the charts. Yet, they have this uncanny ability to look like a peach and smell like roses...if only people looked inside: maggots and treacherous thorns abide.

Just remember that it's very normal to think you might be a narcissist, and to worry that you have traits. While the real narcissists will deny it, and never worry if they are. Unless they're diagnosed, they will never understand. May I suggest a channel called "Mental Healness." Lee Hammock, the self aware narcissist who has been in therapy for 4 years, and has done a complete 180, and still working on himself. You get inside of the narcissist brain, and if you have any questions that aren't answered, he always does a wonderful job at answering them.

@@DelphineTheWorstBladeEver Thank you. I think I'll check that out and maybe pose my question to him too. I think this topic would be worth a whole episode of discussion, because narcs of this type can be the most dangerous, given their access to vulnerable people through their pop-psych and pop-spiritual venues.

It's called "projection"; placing your own negative traits or unwanted emotions onto others. But narcissists don't have a clue that their are projecting because they are worthless dirt bags with less than zero self awareness.