Faces of Bipolar Disorder (PART 5) "Rapid Cycling" 

I hate being bipolar. It's great!

I am a ultra ultra rapid cycler. I actually swing from moment to moment. It’s so confusing to the people around me. I’ve been bipolar since I was 13 and I am now 50. Unfortunately, my disease gets worse as I age. My husband left me because he couldn’t handle my bipolar. He took it personally. I tried to educate him, but he wouldn’t listen to me. I am grateful to people who make these videos to educate everyone.

Up till last year I honestly thought everyone cycled daily like me. I always cycle throughout the day and thought it was normal for everyone who is bipolar, then I found out most people only switch every week or month and I actually got depressed because of it, I had the thought of "wow, I'm even crazier than other bipolar people" And that hit me kinda hard. So anyone who is close to someone like this, my advice is, supporting them is a huge thing. It's hard enough dealing with it on a daily basis, but if they are in the same spot as me and have not a single person trying to help, it becomes unbearable at times.

Rapid cycling is horrible! Today I did not get out of bed until 4pm asked my sister to come with my to get my weekly allergy shot.. on the way back I got very irritated and started yelling at her for no reason she even started to cry and asked me why I was mad and I told her “you know why” but I didn’t even know why... 15 min later we were laughing and singing like nothing happened.... then when we got home i ate a sandwich laid in my bed again got irritated again for no reason and now it’s 10pm I’m exhausted my head hurts and I can’t sleep😒

As a non bipolar i can't emphasize enough how valuable this channel is to give me insight. You deserve a medal my friend for sharing all this

Ultra ultra cycler here. I quit drinking about 2 months ago...alcohol is poison, but it’s especially toxic for those of us with bipolar. I never allowed myself to acknowledge this before. I’m coming to accept that I can never touch alcohol again; the chaos is too high of a price to pay. I’m on a mood stabilizer for the first time and back in therapy after being out for a year or so...finally doing the healing work after many years of push back/resistance/escaping. Both feet are in, ready to do the work. I actually want to change and it feels really good. Thank you for the video!

BPD1 with rapid cycling. I've explained it to my Dr as, feeling like you won the lottery then suddenly feel like your best friend passed away. It's so difficult to explain what it really feels like.

I can't believe you aren't a doctor or therapist, your channel has been so helpful to me. Every information you share is so concise, clear and well put. I'm also relieved to relate to all these aspects I thought only I experienced. Keep the work up, would love you donate to help you out!

I'm currently 23, and I got diagnosed with bipolar type II two weeks ago and I've journaled 21 different episodes in the last 6 months, oh god. Granted, a few of those (likey 4 of them, certainly at least 2 though from SSRI induced mania) were due to medicine, but still, oof. As far as onset with depressive symptoms, it was there very strongly by the time I was 10. I was just some kid who had no idea the things I was thinking and the bad things I wanted to do were highly abnormal. I just hope that for anyone out there who is questioning things... it does not hurt to journal your symptoms!!! I have found this extremely helpful.

I had no idea rapid cycling was a symptom until I got diagnosed with bipolar. I thought I was being misdiagnosed because my episodes weren’t as long as people say they should be. I will make appointments and start a new hobby and might purchase a lot of things in my first half of the day and then at night I drop to the floor and scream and cry and I hate not knowing how long I’ll feel good. I know it won’t last long and I hate it. Therefore I’m never able to finish anything like my hobbies or my chores because I cycle into a depression too fast to finish.

I don't have this illness but my daughter has, it's so very upsetting to see your much loved child in such turmoil, so much so that I may as well be a suffer too. Thank you kindly for your help and time in helping others to know they are not alone. Blessings.

I have been misdiagnosed with unipolar depression for almost 10 years and it's such a relief to have finally come upon your videos and this community you help build. Thank you so much.

I can’t believe I wasn’t diagnosed until my late 40s, your videos are true lifesavers!! Great job!!

This is me. I'm bp 1 rapid cycling. Pure hell. Glad I finally got on medication and my life is so much better.

I was misdiagnosed with major depressive disorder for many years and I just got bipolar 2 rapid cycling diagnosis at 58. I’m responding well to Gabapentin as a mood stabilizer. Also taking Wellbutrin for depression and BuSpar for anxiety. Psychiatrist sees me every month and I’m in an IOP (intensive outpatient program) 3 days a week for extra support. I’ve been sober for 38 years. I also go to OA to stay abstinent from binge eating to cope with symptoms. I’m stable with a lot of help and support. Thank you for your helpful videos!

Robert - you know many people feel aided and befriended and profoundly helped by your videos. so.. what can we do for you? who helps you? your bravery is truly inspirational. would love to even in the teeniest of ways help you back. Very best wishes. Philippa

My mood can change drastically one hour to the next sometimes I am very indecisive sometimes I can feel the chemicals surge through my head and mood change

I may or may not have this.. I want to get it checked out

Excellent!!!! Hey! I'm a rapid Cycler too! Thank you so much! Love to you Rob!

I have learned more from you than all my councilors. Thank you

I finally was diagnosed in my late teens...up for a short time- I would be very active and felt like I could do anything,but then I would crash hard and I would go deeper still and stay there forever..I nearly ended it more than once.. I am in treatment now- it has saved my life!! Thanks for the videos,they are so informative and I have learned a lot about myself!thanks so very much!!!!!

I’m so depressed. This is confirmation of everything I’m going through. I just want to pay for my final expenses.

I’ve been struggling with severe treatment-resistant depression and anxiety for years. I’m looking to have my diagnoses reconsidered for bipolar. Your videos have been really helpful in learning about the condition and the various ways it presents itself. They have helped inspire Me to contact professionals and try and find better help. I love your approach to presenting the information and I appreciate the efforts to educate.

Thank you for these videos!!! I'm SO grateful for you and your channel!

Another excellent video, Rob. Thanks for sharing, man.

You’re the man! It’s tough making sense of it all it all so thanks for the breakdown.

Another great video mate! Your a hero with ya your efforts and your time

I dont leave the house that often. Im a rapid cycler. We also get really confused. And sometimes loose are mind.

Love your continued videos. Your new background choice is terrific, as well!

Hi. As a retired vicar who got diagnosed in 2003 and who retired early as a result in 2012 it's good to be reminded of which parts of me are my 'symptoms'. It's so easy to get confused whatever age you are. Greetings to all my fellow Bipolar Bears out there!

Thank you for your amazing research with this illness and how extensive you speak on the topics. Great videos!

I'm in tears. I am so glad that I found you. I'm in a better place now. I accept that am bipolar type 1. Now I have to find out what to do next. This disease is horrible and I pray for all those who are also afflicted with this. Thank you again

Thank you so much to hear, I really needed to hear that

Awesome thanks for the post much appreciated. I can relate very well to this channel. Iv spent over 20 years trying to help with my mental health, your explanation has been a huge change for the better with me. Thanks again Rob.

I'm so glad I found your channel, words can not express how thanful I am for all your dedication and all the information you bring.

Thank you so much for all of these videos!

I am so very very proud of you!!! I self meditation for years and it was horrible!!! I know longer do that and now I see my doctors and my meds are working wonderful🙏🙏 You are truly a blessing!!!

For the last few months I have been pretty much ready to go. I rapid cycle every week or so. I got out of my relationship of 10 years which was unhealthy and I have two kids. I'm 33. Started working full time after a decade out of necessity. And I just can't handle it. I know I sound not pathetic but you can't see the tears all over my face. I told my mom and my ex and they don't do anything to try to help. My mom says I am more than my diagnosis and says that her giving me money to help out is enough, and her watching the kids sometimes. But anyway, my mind has been made up for a while now and my point is that I've been using a lot of this time to collect mentally healthy memes and pictures and quotes to share with people. I have collected and posted thousands upon thousands over the course of this incredible depression I have felt for the last few months. Sometimes I don't sleep for days and I just collect them and post them everyday because it's helping people. And I just want to help people because I wish someone would have helped me. If you see this at any point in the future my name is iamthecomet and I'm on imgur. Hopefully I'll still be posting, but either way hopefully I made a difference.

Bless you for the great information you put out there. Helps carers immensely to understand the illness from a better perspective.

Rapid cycler here FML. Your videos help me get through. Appreciate it

Thank you for explaining bipolar in a way that the common person can understand. It is appreciated.

Me, 2 weeks up 4 weeks down. At least I get a holiday from the depression. Kept me alive till diagnosis.

Thank you for educating people on this very impactful disorder my whole family is affected by it keep up the good work

Thanks again Rob.

Wow. This has helped me alot. I didn't even realize alot of my behaviour are exactly like u described. Thank you and I'd like to support your channel.

Thank u so much for these videos! They are helping me to understand my one & only sister better & to help her

Hi from Australia, I sincerely thank you for your informative posts. They are helping me come to grips with my disorder. Please keep them going 5 stars from me

Great videos, I only just came across this series as I was looking for good examples of information resources for other sufferers. Very pleased to see someone specifically look at rapid cycling, as it is an easily misunderstood (and often not even discussed) element of bipolar disorder which, as you point out, many of us suffer with. I, like you, are somewhere between ultra-ultra and ultra. Even with medications it is very difficult to stabilise. I still have mood swings, but they are now manageable.

You have taught me so much about my brain. I'm a new warrior and your matter-of-factness calms me as i wrap my head around this. Thank you thank you thank you!!!

You are honest and so courageous for helping people understand there diagnosis...

Hey, man. Just wanted you to know that I really appreciate you making these videos especially this one. I was diagnosed with bipolar at 17 and I could be manic then depressed in the same day. I hadn’t heard any stories like mine so I always had a pestering voice in my head saying I was over exaggerating everything and I still sometimes feel like I can’t relate to anyone else with bipolar. But this video really helped me see that what I experience is real and it happens to other people too. So thanks

Again well done, I'm trying to find your video on the 8 different types of bipolar I enjoyed it very much and have alot of family members who would love to watch it, thanks again

I was recently diagnosed at 34yrs old, your videos are awesome, you explain everything in a easy to understand, kind, calming way, that I find to be very helpful, and mood stabilizing. Thank you so so very much, you are a God send, best wishes and blessings for you and your family.

My prayers for all of you. May we all find our perfect places in life this new year. Perfect internal and external places. Bless you all.

You're an angel on earth in human form.

So much valuable info ! I enjoy watching these so much. My biggest problem is that I do not know what feeling “ok” or “stable” is like because I’ve been depressed for probably the longest period of time at the moment

Amazing summary. Was married 35 years to my ex who was an ultra ultra rapid cycler. Even after going to a top psychiatrist several times and him explaining to my ex what he was experiencing, my ex would walk out and deny the doctor said he even had it. I never understood why he denied it. He told everyone I was crazy and that I was misdiagnosing him, even though it was the doctor who told him in front of me. After many years of hell and him being unfaithful he took off with a much younger woman. We should have been multi millionaires but he would take dangerous risks not pay his bills and was always fighting with customer so we did not get paid, he turned my beautiful sons against me and we ended up destitute. Now I finally have my own job and can pay my bills and trying to rebuild my relationships with my son's who are adults now. He is still impacting us because my son works with him he doesn't abide by the rules as regards paying superannuation or taxes getting him to lift these huge slabs of stone but promising my son that he will inherit the business even tho it's not even in my exes name, because he has to trade in his new wife's name because of him never paying his old tax bills. He use to take out supporting walls in our house and insist on doing his own electrics in the house even though he was colour blind and dyslexic. He would not let me bring in a qualified electrician and he set up the gas piping in our house.when he was away I got in a safety expert and they shut the whole site down where we were living because he had put the gas bottles beside the hot water system which is a no no. They were also leaking . The gas experts said it could of caused the whole neighbourhood to go up in a huge disaster. My ex got home and exploded when I told him I was not allowed to cook or turn on the power. He had no concern for me or the kids. He was very clever but totally out of control.

Robert, thank you so much, this part of the series kinda makes everything makes more sense to me. it even answered my question in the previous part (cyclothymia), some people don't need a long time to change from one episode to another, and in this video i just learned that they do have name for that specification of bipolar which is 'rapid cycling'. thank you so much you really have done a great work, i am now having marathon of your videos.

I love your vids...so informative and you touch on a bunch of things that help others grasp what bipolar disorder is all about. I have Bipolar 1 (very rapid cycling) and have GAD with panic attacks. It is very difficult to deal with...I'm on SSI because of it, and I still have symptoms no matter what meds I am on, it seems. Sometimes meds will work, but then it's as if my body gets used to it and the meds don't work well anymore. Thank you so much for posting these videos. I have shared a few with friends/family on Facebook. Keep up the good work!

I'm just 31 seconds into this video and already I want to say THANK YOU! This rapid cycling is so hard to understand much less explain. You have been so much help to me! Now on to the video...

I AM VERY GLAD THAT YOU HAVE DONE THIS CHANNEL.I AM SURE YOU ARE REACHING ALOT OF PEOPLE WHO NEED TO KNOW MANY THINGS ABOUT MENTAL INNLESS ...THANK-U AGAIN JOHN...

Thank you for clarifying the criteria and behavior included in rapid cycling bipolar!!! I have Bipolar 1 and much of the time I cycle rapidly. Crying in the morning then bullet proof by noon. I'm a recovering drunk and junkie but I still battle with not trusting myself much of the time. I feel like I will finally convince myself to pull the trigger. Thank you for the information and reminding me I'm not alone!!!!!!!! p.s. you do an excellent job speaking and presenting yourself!

I am bipolar and learning about my condition is eye opening now i am starting to understand ME!!

I really enjoy your content, it gives me terms for what I actually go through and I am able to help approach way earlier. currently in the process of trying to get diagnosed, have a great day.:)

Another job well done!

i just want to say thank you. you’re amazing. this channel is amazing. i’ve been looking for some kind of resource like this for years. i’m 16 and id honestly say i’ve been bipolar about all my life. i have the same as you the in between ultra ultra and ultra cycling. it’s so hard. all of my emotions are so over the top and over whelming. it’s mentally exhausting going between feeling invincible and on top of the whole fucking world back down to worthless and unworthy of love or life several times a day. hearing that people like me usually commit suicide makes me feel depressed and kinda wanna go ahead and do it tbh. but i know that’s just the chemical imbalance in my brain talking and that it’s not the truth. but quite honestly that’s got to be the worst part. having all these emotions and they are so legit in your mind but in reality they’re false and nothing close to the truth and yet you still can’t snap out of this mentality and if you do you’ll shoot straight up into mania and feeling incredible again even though you know that too is a false emotion. this is getting unbearable really. but thank you for all your help and information i feel myself growing and learning and healing just a tad bit already. i will contribute to your cause as soon as i can.

Great insights to help me with loved ones

I have learned so much from you. Thank you so much for the very important work you’re doing.🙏❤️

Just subscribed. Your videos are on point and informative. Good pacing and tone of voice. Most videos that cover these topics are robotic on tone or too hyper. Well composed and very professional .

I found your channel to help my mom understand me better - well you also ME understand me better! Thank you so much!!

To reinforce the idea that treatment is as individual as symptoms I am an ultra-rapid cycler who has been Lithium responsive. Now the anti-psychotic I'm on takes care of the rapid cycling and helps enough that the side effects of Lithium now out weigh the benefits. Thanks again for a super video!

Thank you for this, I am trying to learn all I can to be a supportive spouse and this is really helpful.

Thank you for sharing the information. I have recently been diagnosed with bipolar two/PTSD. Long story short I was bullied. It took five years to be diagnosed. I thought about taking medicine at first (mood stabalizer) but as I am learning more I don't think I am going to. Looking back I relize if it was bipolar or PTSD. The scariest past for me is in rapid cycling plus stress I have suicidal thoughts. But advice I learned was "It is a thought, do not entertain the idea". I am thankful for my therapist. Instead of going to vent it is learning how to manage my anxiaty, self care, ect.

as ever, thank you deeply for this vid and all. its a hard thing to take that the GP's at least here in UK for the most part REALLY dont get it. and by that I mean, they are completely and utterly unaware and their advice can often be, if followed, fatal. watching this video , as with all your videos, has given me renewed strength to somehow write about this, talk to the medical profession over here and so on and so forth. Thank you

I haven't been diagnosed with rapid cycling, just with Bipolar 1 after a hospitalization in my early 20s. But Ive never heard somebody explain and break down the differences between the all the rapid cyclings. I resonated alot with the ultra rapid cycling and ultra ultra rapid cycling, especially then in my early 20s as I was abusing substances at the time before the hospitalization as well. Thank you so much for these videos, the information and for letting us know we are not alone!

I am so glad I found u. I was told that I was bipolar when I was 40 by my family doctor. I am 70 now.

Thank you for making these videos your doing amazing work.

great job

You are more sensible and knowledgeable than all the doctors I have ever seen. I certainly think that you are a gifted “teacher” in relation to bipolar probably because you have the condition yourself. I am an ultra, ultra rapid cycler who has just spent the last few MONTHS withdrawing from lithium, antipsychotic and halving sertraline dose due to the medications causing chronic fatigue, cataracts, glaucoma, heart disease, diabetes, thyroid problems none of these side effects never having being pointed out to me by my doctors. I am now employing lifestyle changes eg diet, exercise etc to remedy these conditions plus my bipolar disorder. I realised through my own research that the medications were causing these problems. I certainly agree that bipolar should be treated in a multi faceted way and that patients should be made aware of medication side effects and interactions. I am 64 years of age and no longer blindly follow doctors’ instructions instead relying also on my own research and finally feel I have control over my own health.

Thanks

3:16 yep that’s me I cycle between hypomanic and depressive states basically weekly

thank you- your videos are so helpful!

You strong so helpful to me I’m on so many meds and I also rap cycle I was also a drug abuser which does make things worse I really am proud of you for helping others you seem so tog and strong and intelligent you give m incentive to try and recognize my symptoms and try to act out on some crazy thoughts 😊🥰🥰🥰

Thank you so much...I am able to use these to show my husband what I go through. I am having daily cycles right now.

Robert you are truly a gift and a blessing to all who need to educate their self or for care givers to educate their self. You may not be a doctor but I’ve never seen or heard anyone speak with so much knowledge and kindness on mental illness or on RU-vid. You deliver your message with such soothing and effective outcome. You should seriously consider going to school for psychology. I think you could be a game changer.

Haven't finished watching, but wanted to take the time to say thank you and express how much I appreciate the time you take to do this and help others. My mom was manic depressive, and I've felt I was as well recently. My mom passed as of 10 years ago, and I didn't realize exactly all her condition entailed until searching further into my diagnosis recently. I always thought it just meant severely depressed. This has shed much light onto bipolar for me, and also helps me continue advocating for my mom (as we unfortunately were cursed with family that has no desire to educate themselves on this). It's been a long road, and a very lonely one as well since I've lost my mom, but I'm happy that in learning more on my own journey, I feel I'm also learning more about her even though she's no longer here to share with me. Thank you a million times over and again!

You are truly AMAZING!

You and I really have the same goal. I've been putting myself out there. I don't expect anything back from it...but it would mean the world to me if someone could be spared years of unnecessary suffering. I definitely wanted to watch this one...I'm a rapid cycler.

Thank you so much for this! I’ve been diagnosed with rapid cycling bipolar disorder at the age of 14 now in my early 20s I’ve managed to understand it more and found a good cocktail of meds that works for me 😊

I am bipolar 1 and I have found your videos really brilliant. My family dont really believe in mental illness and depression. I get the sentence: Get your head right and just stop being moody/get up out of bed! I have made a page on Facebook (Two sides of me) and I am posting your videos. Thank you for educating me and all my followers. I find it fantastic and your info is spot on and well studied. I hope you dont mind me using the videos but Polar Warriors is the type of channel that might wake my family up.

For a few months I was ultra ultra rapid cycling. Im surprised that i survived it... I would pace back and forth all night switching between laughing and talking and dancing with myself, to crying my eyes out, slapping myself and peering hatefully at the people outside my window while planning my suicide. Like 10 mins up 10 mins down... I ended up hospitalized.

You are amazing. Thank you.

I was diagnosed with Cyclothymia about 15 years ago. I smoked pot for many years knowing that I had Cyclothymia. I was ultra ultra rapid cycling. It was a disaster. I'm now on the proper medication, and I have not smoked pot for about a year and a half. I am 1000% better. My moods are within range for the first time in my life. I actually feel good almost most of the time now. Such relief.

Thanks!

You're very sweet my dude thank u so much for your videos you're truly saving my life ❤️

Thank you so much for this channel ... and for every video you've made ... and will make. My daughter has type 1, rapid cycling bipolar for 20 years (she is 35). Try as I may have, I couldn't understand her or this terrible disease. God bless you and the work you do, shedding light on bipolar.

This just helped me so much

Your videos are the most accurate and educational of any others I also see so many symptoms in myself when you talk about them your videos are better than any threrapist oh pshyciatrist I speak to and believe me that’s been plenty 😊👍

Hey mate, just discovered your channel and been watching your videos all day (I’m currently in a very low state). I’m not diagnosed with bipolar but have been pretty sure that I have it for about 3-4 years. My dad has bipolar so I’m very familiar with it and what the experience is like for family and friends it was honestly not very nice to grow up with a parent that has it. Up until this stage I’ve just been trying to deal with it because I’ve never wanted to admit that I have a problem and I know by going to the doctor that I will have to admit it and tell others. It’s really starting to affect my life. If I could be the person I am when i am on the “upper” all the time, I would have achieved so much in my life by now. But the “downer” periods of my life just throw it all away and reset it all. I’ve decided I’m finally going to see someone and made an appointment today. Thanks for your videos and the good you’re putting out into the world 👌

I can see parts of myself in most of these videos. The fact that bipolar is out of the closet is reassuring to me & validates that it is a physical disorder rather than a character flaw. I was diagnosed 47 yrs ago. I've seen mental health treatment advance more than I would have thought it could, now we need to stop stigmatizing ourselves. Thank you for the videos & please keep them coming.