God is Dead! | A Review of Reaper's Creek by Onision (Part 1) 

Everyone: The room was silent Onion: The room echoed with n o n - a u d i b l e n o i s e

"It's about a twelve-year-old who gets cool alien powers!" "Oh cool! Sounds like the kind of book I'd read as a kid!" "And there's a graphic sex scene." "WHAT."

“I’m not excusing him of being a pedophile, I don’t have enough evidence” oh that just aged like wine

There was technically a school shooting, he was firing arrows at fish. I'll see myself out.

james: the light arthur: the darkness gregniel: an entire shitshow

"Let's eat Grandpa." "Let's eat, Grandpa." Punctuation matters, Onion Boy.

Greg makes wattpad authors look like J.R. Tolkien

"Are periods an uncomfortable subject?" Of course they are for him. It means they're out of his age range.

Stones to Abigail; “This is the worst book I’ve ever read” This is why I hate you; “okay no tHIS HAS TO BE THE WORST-“ Reapers Creek; *FURIOUSLY CHOPPING ONIONS* “AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH”

James was a 'niceguy' Arther was an 'incel' And I'm deeply disappointed that Daniel wasn't a 'neckbeard' to complete trinity.

Greg's middle name is Daniel, just to let you all know. This is most definitely not a self-insert, right???? RIGHT???!!!??!!!

Onision is so unfamilar with periods, even his girlfriends don't have them.

We need to appreciate this man. Not only does he read these God-forsaken books so we don't have to, but he wears a Toothless shirt that says Sexy Beast and shows us the cat.

"God is rapidly ceasing to exist" Fixed the title

So is no one going to bring up the hypocrisy of. "My backwoods are like my best friends." After he tried the whole Gofund me for demolition work for the ecosystem behind his house.

Krimson Rogue: This is the WORST book I have ever read! Look at the notes I took and the tabs I used! Empress Theresa: Hold my 12 bottles of Coke....

"Hear a non-audible noise" I... I think that might sum up Onision's competency in writing.

The parts where he "accidentally" self-inserts himself as Greg reminds me of the scene from The Office where Michael wrote a script and made Dwight the dumbass character and replaced his name but missed one "Dwigt"

He turned off auto correct off because he was annoyed that periods kept coming after double spacing.

Greg acts like every single woman is attracted to him, I assure you, we aren't.

ahh, yes, as a sister I can relate to the first world problem of disappearing at random times.

He did it The absolute mad man. He wrote a trilogy of hot garbage.

Do I know Onision? Nope Is english my first language? Nope Am I going to sit throught two full video of a man absolutely destroying Onisions' book? Hell yes

"Now MY spring break was ruined becauase I had to think about a dead baby." That is the perfect description of how Greg's mind works. He is such a narcissist he cant fathom empathizing with anyone else's tragedy.

greg: my best friend is the woods uwu *insert clip of him bulldozing the woods in his backyard, illegally*

this book is genuinely less well-composed than a warrior cats fanfiction that I wrote in 4th grade

My texts to my husband asking him to get milk are more well-written and engaging than anything Onision has ever crapped out.

Stones To Abigale: "I'm a dark and brooding badass." This is Why I Hate You: "I'm a dark and brooding badass KILLER." Reaper's Creek: "I'm a dark and brooding badass GOD KILLER!"

This man reading Onisions book should be classified as self harm

Any decent writer: this dude died Onision: r a pi d l y c e a s e e x i s t i n g

The L kept disappearing from Phill's name because Onision was too busy holding it.

“God is dead, and Onision has punched him in the throat or something.” -Nietzsche, probably

this book makes me want to “rapidly cease existing”

When Onision has been raging on Roblox and it reflects in his writing: “Go commit rapidly cease existing”

Calling it now, His fourth book will be only tabs and everything is highlighted

I think the way I would introduce the stillborn baby would be something like: _By chance, I looked up from whatever I was doing. A distant red glow moved in a straight line, obscured behind the wall. It traveled at the speed of a car up our gravel driveway. "Somebody bagged a dear, probably." I perked at the thought of venison for dinner. The glow came up the driveway, came through the sliding glass door. On second thought, it was small. Like a chicken dinner. Less fun, but whatever. I could've used a break from homework at that moment. I rounded the corner. My face fell. It was a pregnant woman's stomach._ Shitty rough draft of a scene there, but I guess you get the idea.

I used to write stories a lot like Onision does. Then I turned 8 years old.

You look like someone tried to draw Keanu Reeves from memory and accidentally made him an English major

Other writers: *[usually] improves the more they write* Onision: *gets worse*

Onision doesn't know how to human. He can't write them because he doesn't know how they think. It's a common trait in sociopaths.

“Non-audible noise” i just wanna hear how onion boy defends that line

This characterization is so bad that I kept forgetting Daniel was 11 and was genuinely shocked every time it was mentioned

Your cat was trying to save you. He says, "Pay attention to me!! I'm more interesting than Onion boy's books."

My fiancé listened to this part 1 and he said, “that...that zapped literal energy from my brain. I was energized when I came here. And now I’m tired. Onision has killed my brain cells and now I have to say...I hate him. I feel like I need to go get hooked on phonics. Like I need to read Plato. Like I need to beat Onision with actual books.”

As someone who grew up genuinely isolated and lonely, I do understand the whole 'the woods are my friend' thing, but like... they were my friend because I could wander in them and day dream for hours. Not because I anthropomophized the trees.

I can already tell that the story of Krimson getting a cat off of his chair will be an infinitely more engaging tale than whatever Onion-boy has for us today.

Power move on your part, releasing this the morning after Onision started copyright claiming everyone

so, fun fact: i impulse wrote a bad fanfiction in 2018 because i felt like it. there was no plot, foreshadowing, or meaningful character depth, mostly because i felt like writing and i was 13. in the first 25 (there were 50) chapters i consistently used the wrong their/there/they’re, your/you’re and to/too, and there were multiple pov changes and a few accidental tense changes. i wholeheartedly believe it is better than this.

“I can dream better than anyone.” Weird flex but ok.

Fanfic writers: Make real plans, work on making characters, work on making a sensible plot, may actually ask friends to proofread, will most likely take constructive critiscism Onion: nO cRiTiScIsM pLeAsE i DoNt NeEd It

Whenever I get discouraged with my writing, I remember that Onionboy will always be worse.

I'm so fascinated by the idea that anyone would actually say "illigal drugs" in their thoughts, like why do all his inner monologues sound like a lizard person?

watching this after onision being accused of pedophilia with heavy evidence makes me sad that we literally missed another warning sign which is that book

You and Strange Æons fire content is the only good thing to ever come out of Onision’s entire existence

this book makes me wanna commit rapidly ceasing to exist

“I’ll leave it up to you to decide what events really happened, and what is a product of creativity”: the introduction to a book in which an 11 year old boy meets aliens, is hunted down by assassins, gains godlike powers, commits genocide against an entire race and changes the fabric of the universe.

"Wow, these alien abductions are really getting repetitive" I actually WAS able to use that sentence - one time when I was playing the sims, one of them got abducted 3 nights in a row.

“He decided to double space everything” *i physically recoiled*

Onision book #1: it couldn't get worse Onision book #2: it couldn't get worse Onision book #3: it couldn't get worse

It struck me....all of Onision's school love interests have names that start with an A. Abbigale, Ashley, Audrey/Abrey.....

I really want "three, two, one- you're wrong it was aliens" on a shirt now.

Honestly I found the book inspirational. If someone can write and publish a book this godawful, then I can DEFINITELY turn the hacky bullshit I write into a novel. Thank you, onion-chan!

Part 1 is one hour. Krimson, you must be overworking yourself

“3, 2, 1, you’re wrong it was aliens.” Beautiful, this is a better twist than onision ever wrote

this book should be renamed "bold and brash" because it belongs in the trash.

Someone send a copy of this book to Chris Hansen in an envelope labeled "Evidence"

It’s like that one episode of The Simpson’s where Marge wrote a book that was a self-insert where she accidentally wrote the heroine’s name as Marge for like 5 pages

Onion wrote fanfic of himself, that’s a level of narcissism I’ve never seen before

Onision's books are like the perfect example of when Narcissists try to write. They refuse to let their work be edited, their work has unironically creepy themes with zero self-critique or self-analysis, the self-insertion is painfully obvious because they can't imagine the experience of anyone but themselves, and any critique they get falls on deaf ears and is chalked up to stupidity ("people are too stupid to get what I was going for") or haters ("people are just jealous"). Edited to include self-insertion

How to summarize this book in four words: *_This ain't it, chief._*

The 'rapidly cease existing' part made me think of the time where I read something online and instead of saying blood, they said 'life support liquid'

“I don’t want to die, I just long to rapidly cease existing.” This is my new life mantra.

*watches video* "Suddenly my Frozen/Mortal Kombat fanfiction from freshmen year doesn't seem all that bad."

You know what, as an English teacher I just found a good source to let students practice story writing: by correcting Onision-books. lol edit: I'm not serious about that. Calm down.

"Sometimes I feel like my real friends are the woods that surround my house, the creek that runs by it ... they don't leave me, they don't lie to me--" CRAWLING IN MY SKIN, THESE WOUNDS, THEY WILL NOT HEAL!

truth is, everything in this book was real, but Onision is such a humble god that he erased our memories of having steel fingernails and vagina teeth

so lemme get this straight, not only do i get End game, Game of thrones' largest battle to date BUT I also get you slam dunking on a emo man baby's crayon scribblings once again? THIS IS A GREAT TIME INDEED!

"And his two sisters, one of which doesn't always exist." You know, if this was by a better writer, that sentence would fill me with optimism and intrigue. As it is, it's got me pumped to see Krim tear Onision a new one.

"darkness created by my own eyes. I opened them." this *sent* me

The whole 'self insert' bit gets so much more fun when you learn that Daniel was his birth name.

“Are periods an uncomfortable subject?” 😂 you are def my fave youtuber

“Greg if this was written for children i will be calling the police on you” *can* *you* *or* *someone* *else* *just* *do* *that* *anyway*

The autocorrect didn't work because he wrote it in Note Pad, not an actual writing app lmao. Like Google docs is free man even it has autocorrect.

I think the best “powers with consequences” story I’ve seen so far is Madoka. And the fact it blindsides you with pretending to be another “kid gains magic powers, monster of the week who threatens her city, she and her friends fight, everything turns out fine” deal at first is handled fantastically

Eleven year olds have the self preservation skills of someone whose met god and wasn't impressed

Speaking as an artist, there’s reason art evolution doesn’t apply to him. You get better when you learn from your mistakes and self reflect.

"God is dead, and we have killed him, you and I." -Friedrich Nietzsche to Onision after reading this book.

I love how much Onionman went after StrangeAeons so hard when she still had some semblance of civility. Krimson destroys his books (as one should) but I'm guessing he can't mock him for not being an unattractive chick so he ran out of things to roast him on.

“I sincerely hope this wasn’t written with children in mind.” Well with recent occurrences I’m pretty sure it was written with children in mind. Okay, I’m sorry I’ll see myself out.

I love the evolution of the titles: - Nihilistic Cringe - Second Verse, Worse Than The First! - *_God is Dead!_* Edit: HOLY SHIT!! That's the most likes I've ever gotten on a RU-vid comment tysm guys!

Weird he's friends with a creek considering what he does to his wetlands.

According to others I'm a pretty decent writer. Personally I'm extremely self conscious about my writing and practically refuse to publish anything I write...but hearing about onion boys books give me confidence

"3 2 1 you're wrong it's aliens"

As much as I hate Onion's books, I think feeding these books to an AI and seeing what it comes up with would be hilarious

With how much time Greg spends with them, you'd think he'd learn how to write prepubescent characters.

Ok listen up. I’ve been noticing a trend in how Onision writes his mom in the books, and I'm trying to illustrate this with my very own experiences. See, up until a year ago, I loved my mother like nothing else in the entire world, going so far as to stay with her when she moved out of my dad's house, even though I realized it meant a life in poverty (she isn’t earning much because she can’t be stressed, can’t even work the full 8 hours). My entire 15 years until that day I always loved my mom more than my dad, enjoyed her company more and even believed her when she spoke about how my dad was 'manipulating' her and all the bad things she spread about him. However, around February/March 2020, she kicked me out of the house, suddenly and without forewarning. With all the screaming and destroying furniture that comes with it. That night, as I was stumbling through the night without shoes, a phone or even a jacket (I leapt out of the window in fear, we lived on the ground floor), that was the single most terrified I’ve ever been. Every few steps I turned around, afraid she was following me, and I didn’t sleep two more days after that even as I was safe at my dad's house until I eventually collapsed. Now, a year later, I'm pretty sure I know what led to that. My mom has diagnosed depression, always had even when I was a kid, but that’s no excuse. She’d been manipulating me into believing the things dad did for me and her always had some malicious background. And around the time of her kicking me out, I’d started to hang out more with my dad, even openly questioning whether or not she was actually as much of a victim as she was making herself out to be. Hell, I even just realized that she was making fun of my dad when he contacted her about potentially suicidal thoughts. The point I'm trying to make is that I assume that Onisions mother abused him in an emotional way just they way my own mother did, but he just never came to fully realize it. And I assume that he’s unconsciously trying to process that trauma in his books. As I said, there is absolutely no proof to what I'm saying, it’s just the way I’d interpret how his mom always seem neglectful yet loved by his self-inserts. And, this was kinda therapeutic to talk about, so thanks for reading all the way through.

I try not to compare myself to other writers, but I’m thirteen and my fanfics seem like literary masterpieces in comparison Update: I’m seventeen now and a fanfiction writer on AO3. My writing isn’t perfect, but at least it’s better than Onision’s.

"3, 2, 1...You're wrong it was aliens." is my favorite line.

I wish the scene with the stillborn was much, much more serious. It's a heartbreaking situation. Imagine your friend is pregnant, but only for you to gain the ability and see the dead *glow* and you just so happen to see her stomach gleaming. How would you tell her? Should you tell her? It would be amazing internal conflict for the character.

Daniel is apparently adult enough to feel that drinking is bad but not adult enough to realize he's being molested... makes sense.