Good Fathers Are Vital

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Thinking about my boy's education and how good dads dad.
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A pioneer in digital filmmaking, Van Neistat made his first internet video, The Holland Tunnel, in 2000. He went on to collaborate with New York City artist Tom Sachs, directing a series of short films shown at the Guggenheim Museum in Berlin. Van has since directed dozens more films for the Tom Sachs Studio. In 2010 HBO aired The Neistat Brothers, an 8-episode series of short videos made entirely by Van and his brother Casey Neistat. Van Neistat’s directorial debut feature, A SPACE PROGRAM, co-written by Tom Sachs, premiered at the 2015 South by Southwest Film Festival and opened in theaters nation-wide in spring, 2016. In 2018 Neistat Directed the short film Paradox Bullets, co-written with Tom Sachs, narrated by Werner Herzog, and starring Ed Rushca. Neistat has written and directed commercial projects for Nike, Hurley, Kate Spade, Tory Burch, J. Crew, Twitter, Sleepy Jones and Frances Valentine. His work has been exhibited in museums throughout the world. He lives in Topanga, California.
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29 июл 2021

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Комментарии : 410

@vanneistat 2 года назад

T-Shirts & Sweatshirts: spiritedman.com

@determineddad7935 2 года назад

Mine is on its way! Can wait!

@adamfreed4015 2 года назад

Any chance that we'll get black or navy versions of these? I work a pretty dusty job and anything White turns to splotchy Brown in about 10 seconds and will never be cleaned.

@jonstuart4991 2 года назад

The system will not teach you about making money because the elite need their minions to make the money for them !!

@andymossey9174 2 года назад

Keep us in the loop on Heavyweight stock. Would love a good winter layer. Be well

@mvubu6823 2 года назад

The big mistake guys make is thinking they need to do major adventures to be a good dad. It's far more important to be present in the home, treat their Mom well, show discipline in behaviour and expect it in return. Giving them confidence in their home base, their own skin and their abilities beats adventures. But adventures are cool, if you can. But don't do 1 killer adventure a year and think that's the job done. And one more thing... Boys seek approval from their fathers. Show them you dig what they do. High five some small stuff they've done well and encourage them to do better. They are desperate for it. They'll seek tenderness from Mom, but that approval from dad is important. Any man who reads this will know whatever your age, you still seek approval, a pat on the back for a job well done.

@danielhayn 2 года назад

well said

@dirkbercks8830 2 года назад

Man. Those are good words. I've got 2 wonderful kids and I'm there for them every day. Greetings from Germany 👍

@into_the_wasteland 2 года назад

Not sure I'd call taking your son on adventures "The big mistake"...maybe instead you word it, "In addition to awesome adventures, also do this..."

@mvubu6823 2 года назад

@@into_the_wasteland I completed the sentence and the paragraphs as I intended I have lots of friends who are absent dads and think they can solve bigger problems with adventures or buying big gifts. It's not a fix. But like I said, adventures are awesome and they are important.

@piccalillipit9211 2 года назад

My father is a narcissist. He treated my mother like sh!t and never worked a day in my life. In a desperate attempt to prove I was NOT my father I worked like hell to be a "success" and I chose obviously broken unstable women in order to prove I could look after and provide for a woman. This lead to 30 years of wasted life working to be a success and 4 massively failed relationships - all to try and prove I was not my father... Yeah, bad fathers leave a terrible legacy on their kids...

@winstonzeb2842 2 года назад

Van, here's something my mom did for me that set my mind on the right path. She knew I was crazy ADHD and didn't learn well in traditional public school. So every week she would ask me what I want to learn about. I'd say "Mom, I want to learn how an engine works." She'd go to the library and spend a week learning, collecting info, making flash cards. Then the following week she would teach me what I asked to learn. It showed me how fun learning is, that set me up to enjoy self education going forward.

@Sjudit84 2 года назад

Wow! Props to your mom! That is crazy to think she put so much effort (next to I guess her daily tasks and parental responsibilities) to do that for you.

@hblack998 2 года назад

Bless your mama. She’s a wonderful lady!

@---rg1gb 2 года назад

Damn. Thats a good mom. Love her

@andreaerdely1736 2 года назад

Amazing. The public school system has such a long way to go, but what we do at home (as a parent) has so much to do with it all, as well.

@mrnoname240 Год назад

WOW!

@Brumsey99989 2 года назад

The best thing my father (or just about anyone) ever did for me was read the classics to me every night for at least an hour until I was old enough to read to him. The Odessey was my favorite book at the age of six. When I was in fifth grade I had a better vocabulary than most of my teachers. I’m almost 50 now and nearly every good thing I have accomplished is directly related to my ability to concisely explain ideas in print...in spite of my mediocre grammar. That’s what he did for me, and I am forever grateful.

@shotoniphone5658 2 года назад

Awesome Bran. sounds like a sweet dad. Thx for sharing

@srai6433 2 года назад

What's the book about?

@shotoniphone5658 2 года назад

@@srai6433 I think his comment is less about the Odyssey (a work from Ancient Greece about so many things it’s a bit hard to summarize ) & more about the type of literature he was exposed to at a young age thanks to his dad and the positive impacts & memories.

@anthonyc1883 2 года назад

That's good to hear, that you and your dad bonded over the classics and that you learned a lot from them. Seems like the classics were pretty much dismissed for younger people at the beginning of this video.

@VlogEpicness 2 года назад

Nothing slips through your hands faster than childhood. Every year that passes, you will cherish this trip more and more.

@chrisblunt7627 2 года назад

My boy turned 16 yesterday. I can confirm from birth to 16 took only 5 minutes. Thankfully we have shared a lot of adventures in that time and I pray we can have many more.

@randbaldwin 2 года назад

Answer: Teach them beyond your means. First, everything you know, then beyond....

@CarcinogenSDA 2 года назад

Van, I just wanted to say thank you for every single video you’ve put out on RU-vid. It’s incredibly unique and exactly the kind of thing I needed to watch at this point in my life. Everything about it is just so… timeless and human. Like, I can’t think of any other way to describe it, and it speaks to parts of me that I feel I’ve lost in the current information age. I have watched every single video in order so far and I will watch them again. When I doubt myself and my dreams, yours and Casey’s videos remind me of what it’s like to have them and what it’s like to have a spirit, and what it’s like to love life, and I have a lot to learn from what you have taken the time out to share. It feels weird and overbearing to say all of this, but thanks. I’m incredibly happy there’s people like you out in the world.

@collidednb 2 года назад

Definitely can’t speed run raising a child! 😉

@Zanteeh 2 года назад

You should check Beau Miles. It has the same uplifting and heartwarming tone but with that bitter "what am I doing with my life vibe". My two fav youtubers atm. Van and Beau should be best friends

@spaert 2 года назад

As a man who is now a grandfather of two, I suggest that the most important element is time. Spending time with your kids shows them they're important to you, but also provides natural opportunities to teach lessons as situations come up. Equally important is living as a good man. It may not always look like it but our kids learn more from watching us than any other way. So it's very critical to actually live the way you're trying to teach your kids to be. If you act differently from the way you tell them to, they'll know you're dishonest. Because what you actually do is what you actually believe. I think all of those things (and also teaching your children to be disciplined and handle their responsibilities) will cover most of what they actually need to know. Just my two cents. Everything else they'll learn as they go.

@Howtogetfluent 2 года назад

Really good comment, BBFour :)

@LogicalWaste 2 года назад

"You go in" (*Please go in, I need the shot*)

@user-hd8ej8yx9p 2 года назад

kid goes in looking back like wut

@FallLineJP 2 года назад

“Education is not the filling of a vessel, but the kindling of a flame” - Socrates I think you’re definitely asking the right questions. Love this! 💪

@MercyKamauLifeWorkCoach 2 года назад

Best quote.How true.

@jordanmlance 2 года назад

Imagine my surprise and delight seeing my old buddies Jimi and Martin showing your son how to fix a flat. The world is sooo small :)

@DannyLovesPolska Год назад

That is awesome! What a moment

@mszary 2 года назад

You can tell you found your place on YT when you benefit from the comment section as much as from the video itself. Thank you Van for sharing your spirit and hosting such a beautiful place on the internet.

@FreemanVashier 2 года назад

You don't, "teach him". You play with him, you take him places. some to your liking, others doing the things he likes. The learning happens all on it's own.

@DanRustle 2 года назад

you not trying to be their best friend. you are their father and you need to teach them

@FreemanVashier 2 года назад

@@DanRustle At that age? Dad and Mom are his best friends. There's plenty of years ahead when the father side of things will be needed. For now tho, Daddy (and mommy) rules. It's such a short window in the grand scale of things. Enjoy every second of it

@FlyingElbow 2 года назад

@@FreemanVashier I totally agree. You can't shape or mold children to your liking, as if they were clay. Most of their positive socialization occurs amongst their peers during pre-school, day care, k-12 etc. Have simple fair rules that you consistently reinforce with the least amount of force necessary to help civilize them. Aside from that, let the kids be individuals and expose them to enough experiences where they can find what they are intrinsically interested in and encourage them whilst they pursue it.

@FreemanVashier 2 года назад

@@FlyingElbow The biggest life rule my parents taught me b4 I was interacting with other kids was the old, Sticks and stones rhyme. Anytime I was teased I'd remember it and use it to fight back by teasing them harder after. Aside from that, the overall character of the household is what a child brings forward.

@adayinthelife5496 2 года назад

I agree. But I also expose them to some of my personal skills, sort of passive learning.

@MentholKratom 2 года назад

This video is so important honestly. We’re expecting next month a little boy. Thanks van

@brentlucke8713 2 года назад

Congrats, and best of luck!

@shotoniphone5658 2 года назад

Congratulations

@dandub9148 2 года назад

Congratulations! I had my little guy 2 months ago. Its been beautiful, your going to love it.

@Harkumar.Baishya 2 года назад

Hey, congratulations!!

@deeb8733 2 года назад

Congrats!!

@RyanLawless 2 года назад

As a Gen-X male who came late to fatherhood only a year ago, I struggle with all of this. School failed me completely because of a paradigm of ignoring learning disabilities like the one I had, and I find myself trying to be a better adult to my child and the children around us than many of the adults were to me and my peers in our era. Figuring out how to do that is my quest.

@saintchris5887 2 года назад

I’m in the same boat more or less. Be patient with yourself & your child. It’s okay not to be a perfect dad just try to be a good dad.

@fitzventure 2 года назад

You'll never be perfect. Never. Don't try too hard. They know when you're trying too hard.

@amyarnelle 2 года назад

You are over halfway there with this attitude. ❤️

@jungfrauzara 2 года назад

The essence of imparting life lessons via actual experiences is so vital to developing young minds to become confident and assured adults of tomorrow. You are a good dad Van.

@talkitup1 2 года назад

In parenting "“Hurry is the enemy of love” - Steve Biddulph, amazing Australian writer on manhood and parenting.

@DaliwolfBacon 2 года назад

Strong, brave, humble, and kind. Our country needs men like that more than ever. Be those things, and your son will learn.

@errhka 2 года назад

READING! the most important thing you can learn from your father. My father read to us every night, and encouraged our love of the natural world with his telescope and trips to national parks Kindness and a deep sort of courage ( standing up to your friends even when it is difficult) are other lessons I learned from him.

@roblibbert1052 2 года назад

Way to go. You don't teach, you include and do, and 3 is not too young. When my daughter was born, my main goal was to make her a "Burley Girl". She was skiing in front of me on a rope tied around her waist at 3 while I worked as a ski patroller, overnighting on the mountain at 5, surfing at 8. She and her younger brother built a snow cave they lived in for 3 days at 10 (he was 6). She went through high school masquerading as a "normal girl", swimming, soccer, homecoming court. But when she had the freedom to choose her path she went to West Point - not what we would have picked for her, but she has found her tribe. When we talk, it's not about classes or parties, it's about fast roping from helicopters, live fire bounding exercises and "being in the field". Its a far cry from her her bohemian upbringing, but it's without doubt a "Spirited" path. Her brother is is close behind. The bottom line here is do the stuff you do and take them with you, make them accountable, and push their comfort zone. The biggest mistake I see people make is stopping the pursuit of their passions for parenting, don't stop, include.

@fitzventure 2 года назад

I have spent the last 2 months (summer vacation for the 2 kids), packing and unpacking the Land Rover. Driving, unpacking, re-packing. Sleeping in tents, chopping wood, dodging lighting, enjoying the forest, rafting, pooping outdoors with a cool breeze on my tender white cheeks, explaining the intricacies of tribal land, hatchet throwing at 9:00pm in the Colorado wilderness, Spaghettios out of the can, and cleaning tents in the backyard for the next trip. It's a lot of work, but my kids will never forget it. "We had all these great adventures when I was a kid. My dad was basically a sherpa." This is what I hope they realize. Even if they don't, it's still worth it.

@isabel-rj4kd 2 года назад

This sounds incredible!!

@josephulbrich7523 2 года назад

Strong, Brave, Kind, and Gentle. Very important traits today.

@mibutler 2 года назад

So true Van! Boys need fathers, and they have to learn what's important.

@HowtodothingsBadly 2 года назад

This hit me pretty hard. although I have a daughter not a son, of a three and half year old still, trying to teach her the skills that will really help her in this world. is a bit over whelming. when I some of these skills, I don't think I properly learned how to do myself. and The day we found out that my wife was pregnant was the same night as the las Vegas shootings.

@scubaseppy 2 года назад

You can tell RU-vid is keeping the Spirited Man’s bank account flush.

@johnnysolberg 2 года назад

As they should.

@scubaseppy 2 года назад

@@johnnysolberg I’m a supporter, I love to see it and can’t wait to see what’s next.

@gagepompa8140 2 года назад

Van Neistat is the only person I have notifications for

@theovanzyl7133 2 года назад

My boy turns 24 this year. I still do not fully know how to.... I keep on learning and I know it will never stop. Great video Van and a very important message.

@chickenjungle 2 года назад

Strong and brave are good, but let's not forget kind, gentle, compassionate, and listening.

@parkerhyser3730 2 года назад

Please teach him to be curious as well. I know being strong and brave is important, but if it wasn't for the curiosity and love of learning that was instilled in me in elementary school I would have no aspersions in life, and I sure as hell wouldn't have earned my eagle scout.

@danielgysi5729 2 года назад

We have enough strong men. It's harder to be kind.

@morganaverynz 2 года назад

there's a lot of different kinds of strength

@DiligentDad Месяц назад

I agree, different kinds of strength. Strength and masculinity are also emotional. Weak men cannot control and regulate their emotions. They break down, not being able to accomplish responsibilities. They lash out and hurt others not able to control their own spirit. We need strong men. I would disagree they only need strength and bravery, as kindness and love are the purposes to fuel them.

@kenway9857 2 года назад

Thank you for the videos Van, they make me feel at peace. It's like you are able to make my inner monologues in video form, like you let me air out things and concerns i didn't know were there. Thank you

@desoussama5680 2 года назад

I have a lot of respect for you. I love your work and i always give a lot of attention to your videos because your stories feels so close to my heart.

@porterlandrum9319 2 года назад

Every installment just keeps gettin' better, man!! Extraordinary. Seriously. - Porter in Largo, FL

@mylifetimephotograph 2 года назад

These stories take my breath away a little. I am not crying. You are.

@MarcusTDM 2 года назад

Wow! This is a powerful video. As a dad of two boys, 8 and 3 this really struck a chord with me. Great video.

@JoshTiube 2 года назад

This one really hits home... could be a series unto itself. Currently expecting my first boy this December. Thanks for the wisdom, Van.

@elizabethemberley8112 2 года назад

This was my favorite one yet❤️ what a good dad. What a true spirited man.

@user-uw2st5qy4k 2 года назад

The philosophical and thought out Spirited man videos are always the best.

@17yuck 2 года назад

as a kid who never had a father figure it’s the little things like this are what makes children happy

@slipweasel 2 года назад

Van, your content is so special. Thank you for your time.

@doctauglyd9861 2 года назад

Glad u made a youtube channel ur the only person I'm subscribed to that I watch all their videos

@thebennett2011 2 года назад

Oh I needed this. It’s come at just the right time. Thanks van

@JACKOJACKO121 2 года назад

I lost my father in 2020 He died young and suddenly. In life he was no saint infact he was a deeply falwed man, but dispite his flaws I think he taught me what a good father is. To me a good father is someone who teaches there son how to love and how to be loved. I rarely feel sorry about my father's death, because I know so strongly who he was and how he loved me and my sister. I think the confidence to be brave or to be strong comes stems from that love. It's different for everyone, but if my dad is anything to go by keeping it simple dispite what life throws at you seems to work Best of luck Van!

@lickingfrog 2 года назад

love this channel, life lessons all the way in. makes my mood better, always

@mouthbreathermtb4192 2 года назад

Man…what a good spirited video. This video really speaks to my concerns and aspirations for being a father!

@utopiasnow 2 года назад

thank you for sharing this

@BelaBraichi 2 года назад

Van, I'm so inspired by your work, your words, your ability to transform feelings into images. Thank you so much for the effort you put into this movies. Best regards from Brasil.

@NickSquaredTV 2 года назад

I say this on everyone of Vans videos- but I’ll say it again- it is a DELIGHT to see these pop up in my feed. So well done- so interesting- so personal- no doubt one of if not my very favorite RU-vidr. Thanks Van

@jonathanbinz7532 2 года назад

Oh what a nice Video Van Thank You so much you are the only RU-vidr that make videos like this in the very special way and it really gives you thinking . Thanks

@go2lucy 2 года назад

Love your POV, Van. So glad you're such a good papa for your boy. I'm a mom to 2 boys and agree, adventures and seeing other ways of living is a great way to extend education. Expose them to all the ways everyone lives and they'll hopefully develop empathy and compassion with a healthy dose of curiosity.

@IAMFamily 2 года назад

Bought two spirited hoodies and made a video about it! 😀 Love your work, Spirited Man! 🤗👏

@jasonpoe9054 2 года назад

These films are so good. Thanks and keep making them if you can.

@patrickdougan4066 2 года назад

Nothing better on your tube then your channel. Love your outlook. Peace brother.

@TotalHorseMedia 2 года назад

What you are teaching your kid is priceless. I proud of you!!! We need more dads like you!!!!

@BenLowers 2 года назад

Best episode so far. You are a master of the craft, and a good Father of your son.

@kilpatrick78 2 года назад

Wilderness Collective so amazing! Keep up the good work! I saw y'all had Martin as your guide. I can't say enough good things about him. I aspire to reach his level of chill, but at the same time control of any situation.

@kathyhoyer4586 2 года назад

That you consider HOW to raise your son and share it with us is something I so appreciate. Thank you! it gives me food for thought.

@kweag 2 года назад

I don't know why but i like that the boy has pink crocs. In my head i imagined Van might have pink crocs too. together they have pink crocs. pink is cool.

@thematturlookingfor 2 года назад

Amazing video, warm message as always Van. ALSO, holy shit this dude could teach a masterclass on the use of letterboxing alone. The variations throughout the whole video do such a subtle but amazing job at shifting emotion and intensity its just so damn cool.

@HitorMissHallmark 2 года назад

Wow...what a great experience its been discovering you and your channel. Such a great storyteller. Thank you Van!

@97JG 2 года назад

One of THE best things I’ve watched on RU-vid Very powerful

@michelleslifeonrepeat 2 года назад

This had me crying. Very very good.

@alexanderritznissen5100 2 года назад

"They used for silver..... they used to look for gold" - that shot was oscar worthy.

@ferndog1461 Год назад

Growing up without a father, but instead occasional having Uncles including me in activities, and employing me as a garage gofer , I appreciate this imagery.

@GEAE_Denny_L 2 года назад

My god, this was perfect. What a great dad you are !

@avstorage 2 года назад

love how you say 'strong and brave' as the camera focuses on his pink crocs

@JeffRAllenCH 2 года назад

Strong enough, and brave enough to cry.

@into_the_wasteland 2 года назад

Thanks for this one Van. My dad died last year and I think about him every day. He was definitely a spirited man in his own right without really knowing what that meant. I think I got my 'spiritedness' from him by just watching him and observing. Seeing how my dad reacted and handled situations taught me more than him sitting me down to 'teach' me ever could.

@JamesDevine 2 года назад

Thanks Van, as a father of 2 kids myself this really resonated with me. Now that I remember the best life learning experiences for me were all when I was out with my dad. He was born into the Silent Generation (born in 1939) and was old school in his ways when it came to parenting and as an early 80's millennial, I sometimes struggled to connect. But the life lessons my dad taught me are still with me to this day. From how to safely use a rifle & shotgun, how to fish, how to repair & maintain, how to cook an amazing meal, how to budget. These were the skills that were never taught to me in school. And they will be skills that I will pass on to my kids. Thanks Van! J

@anthonyc1883 2 года назад

Funny how the older we get, the smarter our dads get. lol!

@d1rty129 2 года назад

This is my favorite SM video...Thanks 🤙🏽

@dhirajdhotre393 2 года назад

your videography is amazing , keep up the good work

@biryaniboy7587 2 года назад

Great video… beautiful message!

@strongenough333 2 года назад

My Dad taught me how to plug a tire at that age too!! That’s really the knowledge and a time I remember and treasure most.

@4realoneil 2 года назад

Best one yet. Well done sir.

@johnsoprych483 2 года назад

Thanks for not disappointing me with this great video :)

@thetalkingfly 2 года назад

nice one!

@juanvalles8187 2 года назад

Much needed! thank you!

@mrjono999 2 года назад

Heart meltingly beautiful, Van, you dad well. I'm a spirited dad of 1 for now (1.5years) about about to be a dad of 2. This is my lament. peace and love.

@TheDetrimentalGamers 2 года назад

You’re a good man Van!

@crystal14w 2 года назад

Always epic content 💯

@jackrpool 2 года назад

Your videos are the best. So artistic and well thought out.

@exotichandyman 2 года назад

This is good. Please continue...

@hdlstns 2 года назад

this is a great video with some great advice. I wish I had taken time like this with my son while he was younger.

@michelleslifeonrepeat 2 года назад

Love it. Daddy’s teaching sons. Amen

@ByDylanYoung 2 года назад

Co-raising my own spirited woman over here. It's a whole vocation. Appreciate the logging of your experiences on this longest shortest time.

@roxannebennett5917 2 года назад

Hope the story continues on, I enjoyed it very much!

@TommyKinsey1972 2 года назад

great video. Thank you!

@robertsy07 2 года назад

Great video van, as a 1 year olds dad who takes him camping and in my rucksack hiking every weekend. I hear ya 👍🏻

@auston911 2 года назад

thank you for this family friendly episode - auston from bellingham wa

@goranbertils5700 2 года назад

Just Great! Thank You!

@KristofferLislegaard 2 года назад

This was a good one!

@MoonBaillie 2 года назад

Thankful for you videos.

@richierauscher5131 2 года назад

Van, your work is a treasure to behold in these times, and will be a true, honest look at the rigors of life in all aspects, for years to come. A role model for us fathers, creators, and doers who simply want to be useful to the world around us. Nearly 3 years ago my family and I came within seconds of losing our lives in the Camp Fire, and escape was not a given. Since that day it's been a mental struggle raising two children, one of which is a boy, in a world where every move and misstep is viewed with a critical eye, and a life sentence of condemnation for the mistake of making a mistake. Your voice sheds light on the reality of the unknown path we take as parents, men, and fathers, and how the only thing you can do is attempt to do your best. Please never stop.