Goodbye "Friend Zone," Hello Platonic BFFS 

In fact this type of relation is harder to come by and will continue to head towards near extinction in the more recent generations, as they view people only as means, and assess relationships on what they can gain. This is why people will turn away from any sort of relation that does not give them what they want immediately.

@@aaronbrown3820 Not sure. The more people who identify as Ace, Aro or both in the following generations, the more *platonic* will become normalised and just another option for relationships and friendships. I think it's about damn time, it had it's time in the spotlight.

I hear the mention of friends once and trust to believe that person is garenteed Psychopathic Shock Trauma out of nowhere and a large amount of mental health issues is garenteed to cause them a significant change to their operating program and systems in the First exposure session... is the retardedness really worth it for you?

It's not the cultural perception that that's the only thing allowed, it's the wisdom that it's the only thing that works.

​@@O1OO1O1for you

​@@clearseas2657In fact, the woman who befriends men is stupid

​@@O1OO1O1 stop projecting that the only thing that works is the thing that works for you. As a society, not everyone is like you.

​​@@fabio9936 Romantic relationships are a type of friendship, so anyone with a girlfriend already has a female friend.

Phoebe had a huge crush on Joey tho. And he did mess around with his sister

I really like Chandler and Rachel dynamic too

Yes but I ship them and they are filtred, on the show. I think in real life friendship like this, ended up relationship

Hell yes.

I like that this is being normalized and better represented now as well. I was a straight cis female who had a large number of both female and male friends growing up and through university, but most of the my hetero cis male friends disappeared after they entered into relationships - either because they didn't think they could be friends with me because they were in a relationship now, or because their significant others put a kibosh on them having any female friendships other than those related by blood/marriage.

@@felisd I understand. I have a handful of friends, mostly women. But I've lost so many female friends who have taken up with a male partner; this seems to be an unfortunate deal breaker for so many.

Agreed and likewise.

Me too actually but it is sometimes difficult to manage them when you have partners because they could get jealous and other things

@@DDZ516 Well, speaking for myself, I had a male friend of mine move in with me after he had a significant break up, and I needed someone to share the rent with in my apartment during the pandemic. We were acquaintances before that and met through a mutual friend, so I felt comfortable opening up my home to him as we were both flailing around trying to sort things out during lockdown. We're both in our mid thirties and have each done the dating scene. He and I both go on dates with other people, he and I have our own circles of friends with some shared people in common, we will occasionally go out to do things together as friends - grab dinner, see a movie, watch baseball, whatever - but we don't feel any attraction to one another, and we each enjoy having our own space to retreat to. He's never made a pass at me, in fact he has many women friends who he has no desire to sleep with (which might be why his last relationship didn't pan out), and I don't flirt with guys I have no intent of pursuing. When there's no "spark" there (cliched as that sounds), it gives you a chance to connect with someone in ways that can lead to a stronger plutonic relationship. I think the reason why guys tend to think about sex with any partner is because there's that desire for physical intimacy that comes with being in a sexual relationship. It's not necessarily about the act of sex itself, it's about the feeling of closeness and that human contact that unfortunately you guys do not get from other trustworthy relationships. Women hug, we cuddle, we touch, but if guys do that with one another, your masculinity and sexuality is called into question, so you just don't do it. Therefore, every other relationship a hetero guy has with the women in his life MUST be perceived to have some sort of sexual tension to it, because it appears the only time men receive physical contact from anyone is from a romantic/sexual partner. So I am respectfully rejecting your notion of "the friend zone" because it implies that you were put there, instead of choosing to remain in a plutonic relationship with members of the other sex. Also in your "poll" you say men would have sex with any plutonic relationship of the opposite sex, yet you also claimed your best friends aren't your "type" which means that there are certain boundaries you have established with your relationships to women, and that don't depend on physical appearance either. So I think one or the other things must be true, but not both. It sounds like you already do have relationships, or at least understand the concept and principles of men and women remaining in friendships without sexual or physical attraction.

​@@BrokeredHeart 👏👏👏

​@@DDZ516 Maybe it's just your social circle? If what you're saying is true for all guys, then no resonably attractive woman would ever be rejected by the men they like. And we are rejected plenty. I've been rejected romantically by guys who flirted with me HARD, like wtf... Sometimes you're just not that into someone even if they're attractive. Sometimes you are attracted to them but you want nothing to do with getting into a romantic relationship with them. And people don't want to deal with whatever "catch" that could come from "just sex." Life has consequences. You call those to women your best friends, so it is working, no? So what if you could have sex with them hypothetically? A mature adult can compartmentalize that and it seems like you're capable of that too.

​​​@@DDZ516 I dont think being willing to have sex with someone if given a chance means it's not platonic or you're in the friend zone unless sex is constantly on your mind when you're with them or if you're only hanging out with them in the hope of having sex with them. I'm a woman and ive had friends of whom i have thought of sexually but i dont think that makes us less of platonic friends. I think it counts as a friend zone situation if the primary feelings you have for them are sexual or romantic and you're only friends with them because you cannot be more.

That's awesome! I've been best friends with my platonic male friend for 6 years. We tried living together but that didn't work for us. He's one of my favorite people and I wouldn't change anything. I know he feels the same.

Oh yes! That was an epic pairing.

Funny, their British counterparts get no such reassurance.

THIS! Even Me who is into shipping a lot, had to double take and respect their Platonic dynamic the show remain consistent with regarding Sherlock & Joan. The younger me didn't really get that, and fell out of love for this during it's original airing. But almost a decade later, last year I decided to rewatch and finish the show. And I was so impressed, as adult I could appreciate more the need for such platonic relationship between male & female. The creators and the actors really executed so well in that show. man, Elementary is heavily underrated. It's really funny that majority of CBS's Elementary fans wants Holmes & Watson to stay platonic eventhough they are of opposite genders and it'd be just so easy to make them a romantic pair , while the fans of BBC 's Sherlock are determined to think of Sherlock & Holmes as two gay people who are unaware of the love they have for each other.

I LOVED the fact that they did not pair them up. They are perfect as friends, even sort of family (sensible and crazy cousins kind of dynamic)😊

@@viktoriag.6961 they are 'just two people who love each other' 🥰

Yes, that would be nice. My brother drives me insane but I do love him. I have seen a lot of better relationships between siblings though, the really caring and sweet kind I wished I had.

Especially the sister dynamic from Fleabag, that is one of the most accurate portrayals I've ever seen.

I second this as a fellow ace aro.

Dittooooo

We do need better examples of healthy ex's that stay friends.

I am rather partial to Liv and Ravis friendship in Izombie especialy since neither of them is gay and it still never goes into a will they won't they dynamic

@@SingingSealRiana yes!! And her and Clive

Why did you use the word "pure"? I understand you want to see non romantic friendships, but why is romantic attraction "impure" compared to friendship? A romantic relationship is a type of friendship.

@@carloszapata847 I'm sure they just meant purely platonic..

@@bones642 I'm sorry to read that, you should never be pressured in doing anything! You'll definitely find a way! I root for you!

@@bones642 seems like u were pressured not just for marriage but kids as well. Hope u find peace soon ❤️

imo friendship is kind of the foundation of most relationships anyway, you gotta like someone before you love them. so it's weird that more emphasis isn't placed on friendships, it's definitely more rewarding to me lol

@@chaaaargh You're right, that's why in my case I'd rather build meaningful friendships without expecting anything than date multiple people and expect a relationship

I've been telling people that one for decades. Relationships come and go but good friends will last a lifetime.

I'm sorry for your tremendous loss 💔

so sorry for your loss. I hope you find peace and happiness

Sorry for your loss. Hope you're doing well now. ♥️

That's so awful. I'm very sorry babe

Omg I'm so sorry!!

I am also a sucker for it.. it just feels right...

Ditto

We're taught that for a good reason. You also have trouble for a reason. Don't be so quick to buy into what a 10 minute RU-vid video that makes money from content ad revenue is selling.

@@O1OO1O1 lol why are you so bent on trying to prove this dumb false narrative

Completely agree. That is why I never bother telling my family about my platonic friendships with guys, because the last thing I need is for them to tease me about a romantic relationship. Giving more room to those forceful voices in my head (from society standards) will only ruin these friendships- and I value these friendships too much to let them get ruined all because of misconceptions.

@@O1OO1O1 What is this good reason we are taught that guys and girls can’t just be friends?

IKR? Not every relationship needs to be about romance and/or sex.

She's also too old for him😂

@@couchpatotoe2214LOL!

Damn that sucks, and you’re so right about societal pressure. I wish we could all be collectively more mature lol

Yoooo hello Demi!

Sammeeeee! I’m in the same boat 😊

Demi sexual what is that, an option on the Starbucks menu?

@@MJ-py7dm it just means you need an emotional connection before the sexy parts can kick in for you. You can have sex if you want but depends on the person. You’re in the asexual spectrum. For some like myself, I get an emotional connection through close friends or best friends but it doesn’t always mean it’ll happen with them

@@MJ-py7dm lmaooo. It's when you don't develop sexual attraction towards someone until you get to know them first. It does sound like one of those bogus gen-z terms but I think there's some merit to it.

Well I don't think I personally agree with that!

YESSSS

no

Asshole trope

Pretty sure that trope is just called "he's an asshole".

This can fall under characteristics of the Nice Guy trope. That plot once pushed as romantic is now more frequently reexamined as having negative aspects or manipulation.

Unfortunately my previous male friend fell for a coworker who is in a relationship and it ruined our friendship because he just would Not let it go.

@@kayligo Sorry that happened.

Fellow aro ace here, sending ❤

Ace here, fully understand you. It's hilarious how most superheroes are ace until their meet their future [HELLO I AM SPOUSE] character. Goku is THE example.

@@falconeshield Haha very true.

@@falconeshield that's natural, they are not lustful, that's all. When the right time comes they select a partner. Like goku

"The sex stuff always gets in the way" does seem like the most logical interpretation of the movie, and probably the correct one, but I always viewed it a bit differently: men and women can definetely be just friends and for a while they were just that. When romance happened, it was the preexisting friendship that saved it, they got over the bump in the road and the awkwardness of what happened after they had sex thanks to the strenght of their connection provided by that friendship.

Depends on who I've known longer. Honestly I like to keep to myself either way. But I think it's because there is no fear that your vulnerability might be used against you

@@ayomidedareabel5525Your platonic friend would never weaponize your vulnerability against you.

@@andybotwin2113 lol you'd be surprised. Especially with male friends

Perfectly said 👌🏼

Nope will never make a girl I like a FRIEND… I will be nice, caring, teasing her at times. if she is NOT my type personality wise, and NO attraction, yes I will make her my friend, men have 15X the amount of testosterone running through his body, women have 1X the amount. MEN can’t be friends with women, I bet a bunch of her male friends are just waiting for the opportunity to slide in once she breakups with her current boyfriend, they would love to start a relationship with her given the chance. Don’t be naïve. Friendship and desire are blurred lines. Just because you saw them as just friends. They may secretly want to be with the girl. And are waiting for the current relationship to fail.

you don't understand what you are talking about.

@@KovacsZoltan12 if my post made you defensive, you’re probably the exact kind of guy I’m talking about.

@@wearesatellites91 i'm just allergic to stupidity., including easily predicted, meaningless "answers"...

Yup I’m always right lmao

JK Rowling has gotten good at ruining things.