How an Ex-Mormon Missed All the Red Flags (relationship horror stories) 

Always a good time with you, Amanda!❤ even if I’m making a fool of myself 😂 lots of love to you and your community!

"It was just after the monkey forest"... Great opening line for a horror story

Y’all are the Dynamic Duo!! I mean, your other guests on your respective channels, are darn good.. BUT when you 2 get together, it’s like I am sitting in the room with my girls, having a chat! It’s just so comfortable!

You are so right about the emphasis on physical beauty rather than inner beauty. Moved from Southern California to St. George, UT just a couple of years ago. Cannot believe the priority placed on plastic surgery and med spas here in Utah. Never thought there was a more superficial place than Southern California. At least most of the people in California are a lot more genuine on the inside and accepting of people of all races and faiths than the people in St. George. I learned early on if you are not part of the "LDS Inner Circle" you will be an outsider and discriminated against. Selling my house soon and never looking back. I do want to say I have had LDS friends all my life in 12 other states and faith was never an issue...only in Utah!!!!!!

Ladies, these bad relationships also happen due to youth and inexperience. I was not in any cult but I have my share of stories from my youth.

Can we get merch saying, " Maybe I'm just a whore and I'm kinda ok with that."😅 🙏

As an ex-mo, I agree, It’s a cult.

My ex-husband was great at being the "poor me" "she was crazy" One of his women asked me about it. I told her that he will say the same things about her when it all goes south. Guess what happened lol.

It's always the case of - that was the Amanda and Shelise therapy I didn't know I needed. I'm now at the bottom of my big ol' cup of tea.

Never forget but always forgive yourself. Sometimes you need to cut off people and move on. Hard at the time but good for your mental health and sanity

I love listening to your conversations. ❤ I'm 42. I was recently looking through a diary from when I was a teenager and I had a crush on a guy in his 20s. He referred to his girlfriend as crazy and I believed him at the time. Looking at what I wrote in my diary was a cringe-fest. 😅 As I read it I was saying to my teen self, "oh, girl, you're so naive." Now I've obviously had life experience and heard so many women's stories. When a guy says a girl is crazy it just means he's not able to manipulate her into submitting to his sh***y behavior!!!

Mormonism taught us to turn off our intuition and follow them blindly. I also got in a few bad relationships after leaving. It is hard to trust yourself, but you can get there by little steps over time. I love watching you girls!! ❤❤❤

I love you gals! Seriously, I am so blown away by your honesty and humor. You crack me up while talking about very serious issues. I’m 67, raised LDS, good parents and family. But, I made ALL these relationship mistakes. I love that you can see clearly and share with such authenticity and humor. The scary part for me is that every generation of females in our culture, and most others, grow up with these attitudes and beliefs about themselves. And, THE WORST is that we learn not to trust ourselves. I spent 20+ years learning and y’all are teaching your generation! THANK YOU!

Love you guys my favorite collaboration team ever.❤

You 2 are so awesome together. So informative. I learn alot about me too. Thank you both

Love you ladies together! Not a culty person and lucky to have a great family and no relugious trauma. But while straight and single have the experience of being friends with several narcissistic women and unfortunately never saw the red flags. But ypu live and learn and I am! And as for body shaming criticism and back biting I have found women so cruel to each other particularly in groups. Today Im single and living life on my terms and cutting people out that dont appreciate me for me.

Nailed it on the realtors. I haven’t watched that show yet but I do know my BIL.

Been waiting for thisssss! Love when you ladies collab .

I love u two together it's like just hanging out with your friends ❤😂😊 and chatting around the kitchen table love it

These two Queens 👑👑

This was like hanging out w the girls on Friday night, thanks for being so open and sharing.

❤❤❤ Very valuable conversation…. As an Ex-LDS member I have had 30 + of navigating minefields of interpersonal relationships!!! ….. totally agree

I really connect with and understand the whole "Falling for this stuff is easier than you think" point, because I've absolutely been there. If you haven't experienced those situations before, you don't know what it looks or feels like, especially when the person (or people) are very smart, practiced, and subtle about their methods. The more you understand human psychology, the more you realize how easy people are to fool, especially the ones who believe they'd never fall for it. Those ones aren't actively being cautious, they just assume they'd notice and won't fall for it, rather than actively watching out for it. Something I like to say is "You can't fix a hole in your wall if you don't admit it's there". Remembering that you can fall for anything if the circumstances are juuuust right is the best defense you can have, particularly when paired with knowledge on the things you need to protect yourself from.

Omg i can relate. A 21 yr old male took advantage of me just after my 15th birthday, and after that i was just like "guess im ruined" and went with it

I would watch y’all chat about anything!

Wasn't raised Mormon but Seventh-day Adventist, and grew up incredibly naive... Still led to very similar relationship/sex/boundary/trauma problems later in life. Love you both so much, thank you for sharing your honest stories, especially knowing how difficult some are to tell. It's freakin awesome to see how far you've come and get some of your insight. Never let the douche canoes tear ya down! 💖

💯 these men do not value themselves so when you show that you value them, you are now devalued in their mind.

Love you, Amanda and of course love me some Shelise!❤ Thank you both ❤

Shelise and Amanda are THE BEST 💜💜💜

Relationship horror stories for real! It's amazing that y'all haven't let all this tomfoolery sour you for life. 💪❤️

Love watching you two interact!

Two of my favorite you tube ladies! Thank you Shelise for sharing your story ❤ you are both so inspirational ❤

You two have been through sooooo much! Thank you for your honesty and laughing at what you didn’t know!!!! Me too! Trust no one ever again! Trying and getting closer. Ugh. Being played is so confusing and embarrassing.

Absolutely awesome video. Love rhe both of you! ❤

I absolutely love this pairing! And Amanda cracks me up

My ex and I had a very open phone relationship. We separated, but still love each other very much. We both have unresolved trauma and needed to work on ourselves, but I agree Amanda. If I can't pick up you phone and use it as my own, you're hiding something and I don't want any of it.

My fave collabs! Maybe one day when I start a podcast I can interview you both! 🖤✨

I recently discovered CTC ... I watched the story of Chelsea and Lorraine today, and became more curious about CTC's host. I'm glad that I've now found this video, to learn more about Chalise (spelling...?). Thank you for this.

Very interesting interview discussing toxic relationships!

Wow that plastic surgery statistic was shocking lmfao

my fave gals back at it again !! love yall so much !❤

I had a massive realization at 26:40 when she said “you can’t just go out changing people”. All religions that proselytize expect you to do just that, ALL THE TIME. Is it really that far off that part of our suffering after leaving high control religions is in how we continue to try and change others (especially pos partners). Forgiveness works against us

I love this video! Thank you for sharing.

28:45 accept that what happened to you happened, but don’t blame yourself, don’t let it define who you are ………. and then get on with your life

You two are a power team👍☀️🎉 Thank you Shelise for being so vulnerable, open and being able to make light of the situation. Which shows you have grown above and beyond it. Thank you, Amanda Rae for being witty, charismatic and a shiny being. Your openness and honesty is a light for so many💖

I love this ❤ y'all should have a podcast or do more collapse I love the duo 👏

This is an amazing episode, I really enjoy listening!

Great conversation! Much wisdom and experience gained comes out in those stories. ❤

Subscribed! Thanks love you two together.

Very relatable Shelise! Even to the finding my no-mo on Hinge after just a few short months of downloading it and after years of the worst LDS dating experiences. It’s a true curiosity how we even matched - but I’m beyond happen I took the chance!

Love this!!❤❤❤ You made this engaging and funny, and there's something in this we ALL can learn from. Thank you ladies, your both awesome incredible ladies ❤❤❤

Great stories and wisdom.

Congratulations on having 60K subscribers!

I love you two girls together! The fact that you both now can laugh about those bad experiences, show that you've overcome it. This gives me strength for the future! To Shelisa: You didn't make a fool of yourself and you don't have to feel ashamed! I also have made stupid experiences, but wisdom/life experiences come from faults we outlived 😉 Therefore, thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your stories ❤

Can’t wait to watch!

Loved this. So interesting and helptul

Amanda, I am really sorry for what you have been through (being born into a cult and now...). I do have to say, you are so funny, entertaining and clever. You are a bright light despite of what you have lived through. I love listening to you. You need your own TV show!!! You have an amazing personality. Wishing you all the BEST.

This was SO good! Shelise, I appreciate your being real! Amanda, you're great at interviewing! Love you both! An 1:07:46 d even tho I'm way older, I'm right there with you- so many narcissistic relationships.

Great conversations ladies. I enjoy watching you two together it’s an easy listen. Thank you 🙏🏼 ❤️❤️🇨🇦

Listening to you ladies being so candid is like hanging with true friends. Love you both! ❤

my two favoritesssss i go DEEP DIVING looking for more videos of you together

We all feel sometimes like we were stupid for the things that happened to us that maybeee could have been avoided. Thank you for being so honest and vulnerable because it's really helpful to see people we look up to (like you two) talking about similar experiences, I feel less alone/dumb lol ❤

10:39 my type as well. My husband is indigenous on his mommas side, german and irish on dads side. But boy is tan tan and has what i can only describe as seafoam green eyes (that blue green color)❤

my favorite dynamic duo

Thank you. I think you both did awesome. It is not easy to talk about past relatinships that went sour. So many traps to fall into: self-pity, justification etc etc. You also show one greatbasic injustice: being a woman makes you vulnerable in may situations, and especially so if you have been brought up in the both, damaging and sheltered cults you come from. And you are right: it can happen to anybody. Sadly, in our western societies, we tend to laugh at the gullible, at the conned. It is unfair and damaging, and deflects the blame from the real culprit: liars can tell other liars. Honest/trustworthy people do not have it in them to con others, therefore, they also find it difficult to imagine conning/lying. We should praise them for proving their lovely personality and trustworthiness...But we often prefer to laugh at them. It is not right. So maybe, we should cry that you both had to lose your innocence (not talking about virginity, which is nothing, in my eyes), I am talking about the ability to trust easily...But your life and your happiness are at stake, so it was necessary xx

Great "not so love" story and glad that didn't move forward.

Loved this so much😊

Yayyy Amanda and Shelise❣️❣️❣️

I love a good women-meet-up about the same guy story! I have a couple stories like this!

I read the title and thought “say less, spill the tea!” Boy do I have some horror stories I’d love to spill just to see the reaction of others 😂 I was young and naive but DAMN he did me dirty! Lmao

*sigh* bro ive been single and celibate until just recently and my brain is like deffo still messed up from past traumas like this 😂😂. When does the healing come 🤣🤣🤣

❤❤❤❤ love the colab

LOVE THIS ❤❤❤

58:05 omg! 😂 Girl! If he talks like that, run! He’s very practiced at it

Shelise 'love' life sounds like telenovela 🥴

Just girl talk, love it! 😂❤

I need a just you two podcast because why is it always the most comfy experience even if it’s the most horrifying stories ever

32:30 WIIILDD 😭😭😭

Love Amanda, I've been listening to her stories of her old life, so fascinating, nothing like it exists in Ireland. So very strange but interesting.

I would really enjoy a deep dive with all the tea on that salsa dance instructor ex!!! Oof there’s gotta be some good stories

I can't not ever think of what happened Winnie Cooper everytime I watch her on a podcast!

"what's your aunt's name?" 😂

Mainstream Mormonism what I call Mormon lite/diet Mormon. I'm exmo and I've dated guys just like this Shelise, so I relate to this so so much!!! I've got an ex that still tries to get in touch with me through friends & family.....

I love your episodes together!

I think young people in general struggle trying to navigate relationships. Cult programming definitely makes it harder though.

What I learned from this: trauma or not. The chances of meeting a single, emotional available, mentally stable guy is slim to none.

I'm an ex-Mormon and her experience was very true to form.

Ladies, any man would be lucky to be with such beautiful souls as the two of you!

If you've been conned by a conman/ woman , it's not on you! It only works if you are a trusting person. That doesn't make you a fool, it makes them a deliberate @$$hole. And trust your instincts! If there's a red flag don't ignore it ❤

Omg send a link to one of ur acting gigs!!

After hearing all she went through after leaving her Mormon world, it made mormonisim seem not as bad 😅

sewer rat :) lol I love your personality!

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Enjoyed the episode but the end reason for always trusting your gut seems wrong to me. You should trust your gut but not because you are always right about the reason. You should trust it because right about the feelings you have. So even if the person you suspect is cheating is not actually cheating, the fact that you feel unsafe is true and will impact every interaction with them.

If it’s “natural” only if it’s mentioned in the bible then going to the bathroom would be unnatural. Cause using indoor plumbing isn’t in the bible either

Ladies, please stop being embarrassed about bad relationships. THEY were the ones who acted embarrassing, not you. Shame and embarrassment is how abusers keep getting away with things because everyone's too embarrassed to say anything. Normalize talking about bad relationships without feeling like they're a bad reflection on you.

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Team going through a guys phone👋☝️

I'll do lie detector test if give me a date .... I can you 4 interviews my closest friends for character statements