How Do I Respond if I'm Asked to State my Pronouns? | with Greg Koukl 

FREE Download of sermon I Don't Have Enough Faith to Be an Atheist!: 👉📱cutt.ly/cInI1eo

My employer has put signs up in all break rooms at all our marinas. "If you are in need of pronouns you are also in need of a new job" Thank you the management.

I was a mental health nurse for over 40 years, we were taught not to collude with the mentally unwell.

Dave Chappelle nailed it when he said “To what degree do *I* have to participate in *your* self-image?”

When my son's employer required him to put his preferred pronouns in his email tagline, he put "Freedom and Liberty". His supervisor told him that that was unacceptable. My son said, Of course it's acceptable." And absolutely refuse to change it.

I can't believe I live in a society where I'm required to concern myself over a mentally ill person's concerns.

Dear Trans Community: Don’t tell me I have to accept you for who you are when you couldn’t even accept yourself for who you were.

I woke up today and realized that I identify as the Queen of England. My personal pronoun is "Your Majesty".

When asked, I've always said "My Lord and Master, or Your Grace" their jaw drops as they walk away.

The fact that this conversation even exists is just bananas

We were once in a situation where we, my husband and I, were asked this question. Without missing a beat my man just said: "either you need to see a optometrist, a ophthalmologist or a psychologist"...

I was filling in a form that asked me to tick my preferred pronouns. I ticked the box that said 'other' and stated 'I leave it up to others to use their common sense when referring to me in the third person. This approach has worked flawlessly for the past 59 years'.

When asked my preferred pronouns I respond with “your majesty” or “Oh great one”. I’m usually told I’m being silly, to which I respond “well you started it”.

Always remember; you are not refusing to use 'trans-people's' pronouns, they are refusing to use their own pronouns

"It's not against our views; it's against the structure of reality."

Best response - "I am not mentally ill. What made you think that I'm crazy?"

I was asked for my pronouns in a client meeting, I took a deep breath and replied "No thank you, I'm too old for pronouns" and that was the end of that.

If asked, my response is, "My pronouns are obvious, but feel free to use any you like because I would never presume to control your speech."

I’m dealing with a woman at work who changes their pronoun depending how they’re feeling that day. Every morning she sends a message to the team what she is that day. She goes from she/her, they/them, xie/xue and, wolf/ wolfself… It’s chaos. If we misgender her that day, she cries to HR and we are being forced to watch a Diversity, Inclusion and belonging indoctrination video. So many people are fed up and we try to just refer her to her name to avoid this but naturally we slip up. In my opinion, she needs mental health. Not me. Thoughts?

I identify as a traditional grammar purist. I shall continue using the rules I was taught in school 60 years ago.

My doctor's nurse (we are well familiar with each other) was recently directed by the doctor to ask my preferred pronouns. We both smiled. I told her "she, her, and Your Majesty". The next time she came in the room she gave me a nice curtsy. We both laughed.

I did some work for someone in another country, who added "she/her" to MY email signature. I told her I don't buy into all of this and don't want them there, and she told me that it's quite common practice where she lives. But the very fact that she chose my pronouns for me negates the very point she was trying to make. Needless to say, I declined to work with her any longer. I honestly can't deal with this nonsense!

They asked me what I identified as. My response "I don't 'identify' I am an adult human female". Plain and simple.

When I used to teach in college, on the first day of class, I introduced myself as Mr. So and So and added, "but you may refer to me as Sir. I will refer to you as You." Saved a LOT of trouble.

He's totally correct. I learned in my psychology class years ago to always fight on your turf not theirs. Get them on your playing field and you will win every time.

We've been asked by HR to put our pronouns in email signatures and I've refused

A really good friend of mine just retired from being the HR Director at a mid-sized company....maybe 700-800 employees. She said that anytime she got an application or resume (whichever the position in question required) which made a point of including "preferred pronouns," it immediately went into the shredder. She also instituted a "two-interview" policy for all positions. Any prospective employee who insists on particular pronouns at the first interview doesn't get called for a second one. She, and a bunch of her colleagues in the HR business have learned from experience that people like this are not worth the trouble of having onboard. As for me, I'm still trying to figure out a way to include the F-word as one of my pronouns. I'm at an age now where I really don't care.

I’ve also said ‘whatever you like, it’s not up to me’ and met with stunned silence. No one tells me how I get to think about someone else, especially if it’s a lie they’re requiring of me. But answering Male or Female is terrific.

Morgan Freeman once did an interview with Mike Wallace and the topic of ending racism came up. Mike asked Morgan how he thought racism could be ended. Morgan's answer was simply brilliant. He simply said to stop talking about it. Don't categorize things as black or white. Categorize them by what they are. Color doesn't even need to be put into the equation. Truth be told, I think the best way to shut down this type of dialogue is to not entertain it in the first place. Just walk away. People don't have enough sense anymore to just walk away from stupidity. There is a time to speak up, and there is a time to be quiet. Discernment is your greatest weapon. It's funny how you can plant a seed without ever saying a word. It shows that you're not buying into the narrative.

I once signed up to an online group for people with ADHD. It was supposedly a support group, I also have 2 children diagnosed so felt it may be a good resource and networking opportunity. I was asked for my pronouns as part of the introduction of myself (which had to be written in a message board) and I politely declined stating I used 'traditional' pronouns as a male. They gave me a warning, I held my ground, they then kicked me out of the group. I messaged them asking how was this 'supportive' and 'inclusive' to those who are neurodivergent, the called me a 'petulant child' and banned me forever. True story

I think the better answer is "I'm not unstable or arrogant enough to demand that other people use particular pronouns when they speak about me."

I worked for the NHS for over 20 years, 2 years back HR sent out an email saying the Trust support our use of pronouns so I put "Master" down ( I have been training in martial arts all my life and am an 8th Dan black belt Master, it defines everything about me). I got told off and in so much trouble for stating a fact on how I want to be spoken to. It was the start of being pushed out then told to leave.

I was REQUIRED to use pronouns in a graduate degree course, I had 17, yes 17 to choose from. Who knew we had so many scary options! I advised the professor that I do not use pronouns. He again stated to me that pronouns were required in his class. Second class came up and I still did not select my required pronouns. He announced to the entire class that I have yet to select my pronouns. I noticed that the drop down menu allowed you to fill in the blanks - which I did. I advised him and the entire class what my pronouns are with great pride - Human, Earthling Least to say the professor was not pleased. That same evening I dropped out of the program. Their loss, not mine.

If someone has to ask my pronouns, I know everything I need to know about them. Pronouns are for reference, not preference. The whole "assigned male/female at birth" is even stranger because male and female aren't genders; they're sexes and they're not assigned; they're observed.

Thank you for saying, "It's against the structure of reality" pretty much sums up this decade!

I am currently taking a course in leadership sponsored by my employer. On our first seminar, a woman (also a participant) suggests we write our preferred pronouns on our name tags. She gets a round of applause of course… Everybody starts happily writing their pronouns, but after the seminar people start talking about how dumb it felt. Why is this even a thing when a clear majority is against it?

"My name is Bill. You may address me as Bill whenever you're speaking with me. Whenever I am not around, you are free to use whatever words you like."

I am a Marine Corps veteran and speak on this subject with some authority. Somewhere on Parris Island Marine Recruit Depot, is a Marine D.I. (Drill Instructor) "Welcoming" his new busload of recruits around "O - Dark Hundred" hours - "My name is Gunnery Sergeant xxxxxx, and my pronouns are SIR !"

I just had some medical forms emailed to me for my doctor's appointment tomorrow. They asked for my preferred pronouns. I called the practice - that I have been going to for 30 years to tell them that they have just lost my wife and I as patients. We are not going that route and playing their game.

When someone asks me that, I just reply " gee, I never thought about that. I'll have to get back to you." Blows their mind!

Lord , master , your grace all of these will do

My job pushed before I retired. So my play along pronouns were “your majesty, her royal highness, and goddess divine.” Needless to say, they did not accept and publish them. They never asked me again and my signature block didn’t have pronouns.

As someone who has English as a second language, I'm so mentally prepared for the opportunity when someone introduces herself as, for example, "Jessica she/her", to pretend I think "sheher" is her last name, and keep calling her "Miss Sheher" :) For bonus points, if she corrects me, like "no, that's not my name, those are my preferred pronouns, that's what I prefer to be addressed with", then I can still keep playing dumb, and ask, "oh, pronouns, like `you` and `me`? So when I address you, I should not use the pronoun `you`, so I should address you in third person? I mean, sorry, I should address sheher in third person?"

On forms and stuff, I have been putting beep/bop/boop. I love this for in person interactions!

I would walk away from delusional individuals. Do not engage in the first place. That's best advice as far as I'm concerned.

Hey, I was asked this question, "What's your preferred pronouns?" this morning in my school today, I feel like God sent me this vid prior to today and gave me the knowledge to answer back to the teacher in my homeroom who asked me and every student. So I responded saying, I don't have a preferred pronoun, I have a sex as a male. The teacher was processing for awhile and said so you have a preferred pronoun, and I said no I don't have a preferred pronoun, is not my preference is just my objective reality fact that I'm a male and automatically translate to he/him and not otherwise, because is not my preference.

I told my boss I was feeling attacked, because they weren't providing me with my 'preferred salary'. Surprisingly, the gender ideology wasn't applicable to my preferences..

When I am asked what pronouns are? I respond: "Thank you for applying but the position has been filled"

I get by with You and Me. They're a lot nicer than what I am thinking and they are correct.

“If you paint a dog’s tail into a leg how many legs does the dog now have? The answer is still four. Just because you change its appearance doesn’t mean you’ve changed the reality.”

Absolutely. Playing along legitimizes the falsehood. Reject it at every opportunity. There's men and women. Nothing else and they're not interchangeable.

Mine are always HRH and YM. "His Royal Highness" and "Your Majesty", as I say that I identify as one of the British Royal Family. It works a treat, even for online forms.

My favorite is "Master and Commander"

I tend not to run in circles where pronouns get asked for, but I was playing a game once where the game master asked my character’s pronouns. My response was, “He’s male.” It confused the guy for a second. I could see him wrestling with whether or not to press me for the orthodox phrasing of “he/him.” He chose to let my answer stand instead of risking drama at the table. It felt like a win for common sense.

An important rhetorical point I have been making for years now, I have no "preferred pronouns," I'm not proud of my sexuality either and I think it's silly that others are. Pride in the absence of humility is vanity, and I don't value that as social currency. I also like to have this question on deck when I'm faced with those dealing in gender delusion: "If genitals are no indication of gender, because it's all just made up by society, right? Then how does removing or mutilating them constitute an affirmation?" Also, "gender affirming care does NOT affirm one's gender, it affirms a delusion, demands the rest of us participate in it, and recommends amputation of healthy organs for no other reason than satisfying one's feelings/dysphoria."

Great job once again Brother Greg! I’ve learned so much from your winsome teaching. Thank you.

I always say "Oh I'm not a narcissist use whatever you feel comfortable with" ..... They never feel comfortable with that answer

I am a college student and when asked to write what my preferred pronouns are, I leave it blank.

Matt Walsh once wondered why we can't also have our own adjectives. If you can pick your pronouns, he argued, then I can pick my adjectives and my adjectives are handsome and brilliant, and every time I am referred to you have to include those adjectives.

Ahhhh, yes... The two main intellects that have formed my apologetic equipping, although years ago, so happy to see them going strong! God bless them both!

I can't find the clip, but there is a american senator who used the line "how entitled are you that you have to give me a manual on how to talk to you!"

The answer to "State your pronouns" or "What ate your pronouns" is, and can only ever be "I, my, me, mine." Because it's true. A person can only ever use these pronouns to refer to one's self.

When they state their preferred pronouns just say "Sure" or "ok" and then never use pronouns for them again at all. From that moment forward always use their name and only their name when referring to them "What does Charlene think about this? You will have to go ask Charlene that" or "I was talking to Charlene yesterday, and Charlene said that Charlene wants to go with the cheaper vendor". Easy as pie. If they notice and complain, don't deny it, just explain that you are both respecting their wish not to be 'mis-gendered' while at the same time being true to your own belief in biological gender. Cut off any attempt to argue further with "I'm sorry, but I don't want to have political discussions at work, please respect that" As for being asked your 'preferred pronouns', the one time an emailer at work asked that I just answered "Sorry, I don't participate in pronouns" and when she came back edgy and (expecting my resistance) asked me to respect hers I said "Sure Charlene, will do!" See above paragraph 😁 Politically, to force someone to speak what they don't believe is an obedience-humiliation ritual. You are showing them you are boss and they had better comply or else. That is why communists in Stalinist Russia and Maoist China insisted the starving and impoverished population publicly and frequently gather for meetings to loudly declare that life had never been better since the glorious Revolution and they were so happy to live in the workers paradise! To be forced to say what you know is a lie humiliates a person, it shows who has power and who doesn't.

That’s what I say: “you can refer to me as whatever you want. It doesn’t change the fact I’m female” 🎤

Brilliant approach. Ask questions they’ll find very hard to answer. Your work is done. Civilly.

My wife at been seeing a doctor several times over several months. Then, on one visit, the doctor asked some inappropriate questions. One of them was, "Do you identify as male or female?" I might have answered, "Yes." My wife, however, has a mind like a steel trap. She thinks of herself as a bit overweight so she answered, "I identify as translender."

"What are your pronouns?" My response: "What a bizzare thing to ask a complete stranger." All the while looking at them like they are insanely bizzare.

When they say “you were assigned male at birth” I always ask them “who assigned it?” ‘God?” That usually gets them to have brain melt down and you don’t need to go further.

What does it matter? I’m not wasting my energy trying to convince someone of something they do not want to believe or hear. You do you and I’ll do me means exactly that. So long as them doing them doesn’t interfere with me doing me I couldn’t care less.

Resist compliance whenever possible. This is a slippery slope and if we bend the knee, it will never end… Embrace objective reality and science.

My pronouns are me, myself and I. They are the pronouns I use to refer to myself. How you refer to me is neither my business nor my concern. The words you use are up to you, and the words I use in reference to myself or anyone else are up to me.

When I’m asked what are my preferred pronouns here’s my response; Monday, and the date is an odd number, I prefer Kalugala. If date is even I prefer Schelethalatta. Tuesdays & Wednesday, Eeka during the day but after 4pm CST it’s Bergusch. Thursday thru Friday, Hamalamma-dingdong except for September and October when I prefer Hamalamma-dongdang. Weekends, He/Him but if I’m wearing anything with blue in it, it’s jambalaya. If they begin to write all this down of course I become indignant and belligerent, “What. I’m not important enough for you to remember this. You don’t like me enough to know this by heart?”

Love whomever you love. I don’t care what you do in your bedroom. So long as your private life doesn’t negatively impact my brand or me, we will get along just fine. However, don’t expect or try to force me to play along with whatever your gender/pronoun of the day is. You be you and leave me be.

Last time I got asked about my pronouns I told them, "I think you can see that I'm a man." It is important to no play along and voice that strongly for others to see that they are not alone. Just remember, they have no qualms of calling someone an old white man.

When asked this at a doctor's office I replied. "Mister and Sir." As my authentic self is polite.

Thank you for showing us very wise and tactical ways of dealing with this woke culture!

Set out perfectly. Thanks!

I hire. *If you hire, **_immediately_** chuck any resume with pronouns.* It's very kind of them to warn us of potential work issues & lawsuits & potential for Dark Triad behavior. Do them the courtesy of listening. I also recommend checking social media first thing. Get a signed release, check it, and don't say a word. Just thank them & dismiss if you see these red flags.

If your at work or on a meeting and they have people to state and their name and preferred pronouns I answer: Its important to have inclusivity and diversity but to truly have that you must have diversity of thought and I don’t participate in the pronoun game and thank you for being inclusive of my views .

Straight to the point. Thank you. For that, I have subscribed.

At my dentist surgery every time you go you have to first complete a form about your general health. One question is "Are you currently pregnant?" I always tick 'yes'. (I'm male) No-one has ever queried it. In the instance where I'm asked my 'preferred pronouns I'd reply "You" - unless you're going to talk about me to someone else..."

A line that sets the point, (and gets a laugh from people with a sense of humor). "I don't have pro nouns, I have amateur nouns" If they inquire more, "I'm not offended if you get it wrong."

Greg makes a great point to put the ball back in their court. Ask a question, “Why are you asking me to be inauthentic to my own beliefs?”

We're not required to live in anyone's mental illness or fantasy worlds. I truly don't care if that makes them angry or uncomfortable. It's not my job to be their surrogate therapist. Therapists get PAID to make you feel better about yourself. So it definitely isn't my responsibility to make anyone feel better at my expense. You don't get to bend or break the rules of reality just because your reality is broken. They need to deal with it.

I don't have a preferred pronoun, but I took a 2 day mental health first aid course, which taught me I am not able to actually help a mentally challenged individual , but its much easier to identify them.

I think if I'm ever asked what my preferred pronouns are I'll probably just walk away. No one I care to have a conversation with would ask that question. I've heard the argument "I was just being polite so I wouldn't offend you." I think it's offensive to assume someone you just met has a mental disorder or isn't smart enough to understand how gender works.

Nicely put! Ya know a very wise man once said: “When you have lost your language, you have lost everything.” We are living in a time where our language is being manipulated to fit “narratives”. Words are re-defined to fit these narratives. And all of a sudden you find yourself speaking on your core beliefs only to find that in the eyes of the narrative your are now WRONG!

I don’t recognise the term “cis gender” and will continually ask for clarification if questioned about this or my pronouns until the questioner gives up and goes away. I’ve found treating such people as though they have invented a nonsensical language has been very effective.

Beautifully stated thank you

This reinforces the policy I have when teaching. I refuse to issue to students a questionnaire concerning their preferred pronouns or to include any statement about pronouns in my syllabus. Those who promote doing such things understand them to be ideologically neutral, but they are in fact promoting a specific (and novel) gender ideology.

The public library that I volunteer at claimed to be creating a database and asked my preferred pronouns. I pushed back and said why do you need this and who has access. When confronted they claimed it was a big mistake and no database was being created.

Fortunately, I've never been asked. But if they did, my response is "I don't believe in pronouns. Use my first name whenever you refer to me. So "name/name/name's".

I tell them I never thought about it.. Then I ask them what makes them think it's any of their business? By that time they don't want to talk to me anymore and that makes me happy!

I love this video. I filed a legal case against my employer and the intake coordinator asked me what my pronouns were (hers were listed in the email), and I said "I don't have pronouns, but my license has my sex. I'm female." This video is great, it went with how I handled it, breath of fresh air

My response is, "I don't play that game". And that's it. Polite, but firm, and no apologies, and no follow up discussion. Conversation about it is over. If I find myself unavoidably having to refer to someone with play pronouns, I insert their name. That also makes the point. Fortunately, I'm not really surrounded with that business.

As a British male, of a “certain age”, I identify as a Ford Escort MK2 colour blue…..

A simple question I haven’t heard people ask is this: why is it okay to change the body to more align with the mind, but wrong to change the mind to align with the body? Or put another way: why can a doctor undergo surgery and remove body parts, but not for a doctor to seek to remove the thoughts and self perception? It would seem to me major surgeries and a lifetime of taking powerful drugs is far more violent than therapy

I see this on almost every medical form these days. The form asks that you state your assigned gender at birth. Don't overlook that if it offends you. Cross out the word "assigned". Then, write in "identified/confirmed". No health care worker has ever challenged me on that.

Thankyou for advice. Any followups to this question in case that 'they' person tries to throw the pressure back on you trying to be shrewder? How to you put pressure back on that person by asking questions that do not look like questions and how to find out which responses? I may not be devout, but I hate deception of this kind where they lead you into trouble. Thankyou for this most useful insight.

Bless this man. But I hate to break it to you, this is logical reasoning. That cannot enter into a conversation with these people. Somewhere along there the “rrrrrrreeeeee!!!!!” Would have come out and you would be called all kinds of names and they would be walking away screaming victory and you would be slowly shaking your head in disbelief. That’s where we are.